Chapter 8.

Cas was relieved to notice the reduction in speed after he gave his promise. Dean's tendency to drive fast never bothered him. Nobody could drive better and angels were not fragile, but sudden acceleration for no reason betokened anxiety or anger and he didn't want either to be caused by him.

They didn't talk for a while but that was fine, because they had spoken honestly to each other and an agreement had been reached tat was acceptable to both. He had feared Dean would indeed find Chuck and go in, as he tended to do, angry and protective and easy prey for Chuck,.

Cas suspected that Chuck still hoped to die at Dean's hand, to have that honour, that ending, that moment of dedicated attention from his hero, since he could never have his love. If he could goad him to it, he would, but failing that, he would hurt him in any way he could and it was ridiculously easy to wound Dean, for all his strength.

Cas had hoped to keep them all out of the situation, but this was the next best thing. By talking to Dean after his visits, he could be a shield between them and Chuck's malevolence. Talking was not a wholly bad idea. Dean understood more than he had expected and there were times when he needed to tell someone.

"Chuck knows nothing about how things are at the bunker." he said, breaking the silence, "I've been careful to tell him nothing he doesn't already know. He asks a lot of questions."

"I'll bet." said Dean. He turned his attention from the road ahead to bestow a rare look of approval. "Well done, Cas." He looked at the road again, which was a good thing, as Cas was unsure how to arrange his expression.

"The way I see it," he said, "He has no right to know anything."

"Damn right, he doesn't." said Dean. He was quiet for a moment, then he said, "But you got together with Jules when he was still omniscient, so he knows about her, right?"

"Doesn't seem to." said Cas, fiercely hoping that he was right, "He always had something of a blind spot about me. I was irrelevant to the great plan." Even under these circumstances, saying it was hard, admitting to himself that he had been nothing to his father.

Dean scoffed a little. "Irrelevant? He may have been omniscient, but he was dumber than a brick. I'm glad he never saw who you were, because you did more to get us free than anyone and you couldn't have done that if he'd known your head was as free as it was."

"Unless my rebellion were always part of the plan." said Cas. It was a thought that worried him a lot.

"It wasn't." said Dean, "I saw the way he looked at you when he talked about all the other Castiels."

He didn't want to be reminded of that. "Every other one of me failed. Every other version just followed blindly." he said.

"One, we only have his word for that and b, there are no other yous. There's only you you and he is frickin' awesome. The others had your name, but they weren't you. I mean, you think the loser with the man bun was Sam? You think that trust fund baby was me?" Dean began to accelerate again, then seemed to realise and slow a little. "You're the only you. What you do is all that matters."

"Thankyou." said Cas.

"No, thankyou, for always standing by us. We won because of you."

"I was in the Empty when you won."

"Having saved our lives. Besides, who do you think made Jack who he is?"

"Jack is a Winchester."

"We all are, Cas," said Dean, who probably had no idea how being included made Cas feel, "But you were the biggest influence on the kid. You're the reason why he was strong enough and good enough to do what he did and look at the deity he's become. No smiting, no sexually harassing women in various animal forms. Just a good kid, quietly doing good things. He takes after his father, the best of his fathers."

"I agree," said Cas, "But I disagree about which one that is."

Dean chuckled. "Dumbass. You know, I bet Chuck never looked to see if you were with anyone. Never entered his head to consider it. He made you all junkless. Only a few ever took the tie to check out the human equipment and make use of it."

"Speaking of which, all is well with you and Anael?" said Cas.

Dean nodded a little, keeping his eyes on the road. "Yeah, things are great. We're good together."

"I'm glad and you can talk to her?"

There was enough of a delay in the answer to tell Cas that Dean knew how important the question was. Cas needed to know that Anael was a true partner, like Jules was, that Dean was finally not trying to deal with a lifetime of trauma and loss alone.

When Dean spoke, it was with disarming honesty. "You know what, Cas? Sometimes we spend a whole night talking. I tell her stuff Sam doesn't know. Sometimes, she must get sick of me talking, telling her dumb feelings I carried over from being a kid."

"No, she doesn't." said Cas, speaking from experience.

"Seriously, I bet she does."

"You have no idea what a privilege it is, to be allowed to know you."

"Angels are weird." He said and Cas knew he didn't mean to fire off the barb, but if struck home anyway.

"Don't say that to her." he said, keeping his tone as light as he could.

"I try not to. I try to pretend she's not an angel." said Dean. Clearly, it was still a contentious matter between them. Cas wished he knew how to change that when he had, until very recently, agreed with Dean on the issue. Jules had made him understand that the transition that he regarded with horror and dread was genuinely Anael's deepest desire. He had no way to convince Dean of that, But if Dean and Anael were talking late into the night, maybe she could.

For now, it was enough to know the relationship was a happy one, brining his two loneliest friends companionship and peace as well as passion. "You're making her happy." Cas assured him, knowing he often doubted it.

"I hope so." said Dean, "She was so excited about the scan of Sam's kid today. It's a girl, by the way, but you knew that already."

"Yes. I have no choice but to know."

"Well, thanks for not spoiling the surprise. They really enjoyed telling me. I guess Anael knew too."

"Maybe, maybe not. She tries, as much as possible, to dull her angelic senses."

"Is that why the lights never flicker?"

"That still bothers you?"

"No, of course not." Dean glanced at him to see if he believed the lie. Old Cas would have. New Cas knew him well enough to pretend to. "I'm curious. That's all. Don't worry, I don't ask her this stuff."

"You're turning out to be pretty good at loving an angel." said Cas.

"It's worth the effort. Besides, one of my brothers is an angel. Well, archangel."

"Still very much an angel." said Cas. He was okay with the archangel power and influence now, but it still didn't feel like he had changed much and yet, sitting in the car with his human brother, taking about relationships between celestial and humans and knowing God was living as an unemployable slob in St Louis, he had to admit, the angel he had been when they had laid siege to Hell would not have recognised him.

"And every bit a Winchester." said Dean. Old Cas would never have interpreted that correctly. The Cas of now heard it as, "I love you." clear and unequivocal.