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Alwaysand- That is exactly what is happening. thank you for the review.
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Danny's POV
From the minute I woke up someone has been following me around, it's like they think I'm going to break down any minute and honestly I don't blame them. I can't be anywhere near the other group without feeling guilt or remorse at what's happened. I've sat as far away from them as I possibly can in the courtyard as Beth walks around rocking the baby in her arms.
I told Lori to go inside, it was my fault Herschel wasn't around when she needed him the most. I could have covered them as they ran towards me but I was just thinking of myself. It was easier to just get them out the way so we could clear the Walkers out than have to worry about where they were. The Sheriff mentioned the front gates being opened when the generator was turned on but I didn't think about any of the internal doors.
Carol, Sophia, Merle and our two new guys are unloading our car, taking our stuff into D block but Daryl is sat behind me on the picnic bench I'm resting on. He's taking apart my gun and cleaning it. We haven't spoken to one another at all, not even one word. I don't know what to say. The loss of Lori hit us all, even with us not getting along but no one else seems to want to talk about it so I don't want to bring it up. It seems like they're all just willing to move on and forget that it happened, but I can't.
Carl is stood beside Beth, gun in hand watching her every step. He's making sure absolutely nothing happens to his new baby sister or the girl who seems to be making sure the baby is fed and changed when it needs to be.
The Sheriff hasn't emerged outside since he disappeared yesterday, I'm guessing he's somewhere deep in the prison letting out all his anger. When we took his group in it was obvious there was a rift between him and his wife, never really saw them interact other than when they had to but she was still his wife, still the mother of his children and it must have broken him to be told that she's gone.
A hand gently touches my bare shoulder. "Hey". I look down at Daryl's hand but I don't turn to face him. "I know what ya thinkin' 'bout and ya need to stop".
I look back over towards Carl and Beth. "I should apologise to them".
His fingers grip my shoulder a little tighter like he's ready to restrain me if I try and stand up. "No ya don't. You haven't done anythin' to them that requires an apology from you."
I finally turn in my seat to actually look at him. "She went inside because I..."
"No!" He cuts me off. "You tried to help them and get them out of the shit storm they were in. They didn't have to go deeper into the prison, that was their choice, not yours."
I turn away from him again without saying another word, there's nothing he can say that will convince me that this isn't on me.
He snatches his hand away and then somethings slams against table but I ignore it, he just doesn't understand.
I look back over at Carl who is now staring straight at me. The look on his face is pure hate and I do not miss the flex of his fingers that are resting above the gun on his thigh. He does understand, he blames me just as much as I do, it's written as clear as day on his face.
Daryl is suddenly beside me, he thrusts my gun into my hand and then he's forcing me up by gripping onto my upper arm.
"We're gettin' out of 'ere". He doesn't let go of me as he pulls me towards our car.
Merle frowns when he see's how Daryl's pulling me towards him. "What's goin' on?"
"We're goin' out".
Merle glances down at my bump, "Ya think that's a good idea?"
"She can't stay 'ere. Grab the others, we're all goin'".
Merle walks off towards D block as Daryl opens the passenger door and practically lifts me up into the seat. "Stay 'ere". He leaves my door open as he jogs after Merle and then disappears inside. His mistake.
I get back out of the car but I don't actually have to walk anywhere because Carl is already stalking towards me.
"Carl, I..."
"Why do you get to survive? You're weak just like she was. The only reason you're still alive is because they protect you. You shouted at her like you knew what you were doing and in that moment she trusted you, we all did but you... you were just protecting yourself. You sent us inside so she wouldn't be a burden to you, you sent her inside to die".
My heart feels likes it's hit my stomach , the pain in his voice and the pain on his face just breaks me and I realise he will never listen to an apology nor accept one, not that he has to. He should hate me for the rest of his life.
He carries on talking when he realises I'm not going to say anything. "Your baby's gonna get to have a mum who is alive because they're gonna make sure it happens but I wish more than anything that you and my mum could switch places."
I take a couple of steps back as my composure just breaks. I watch through blurred vision as Glenn forces Carl away, Merle is now standing in front of me shouting at them while Daryl once again forces me into the car. He clicks the seatbelt into place and with one last look at me he shuts the door. The other doors open and close as Axel, Oscar and Sophia climb into the back and Merle slides into the drivers seat. Daryl pulls his bike in front and then Carol is climbing onto the back.
Herschel is talking to him but Daryl just revs his bike and pulls away.
I stare out the window watching the scenery fly by. The silence in the car is deafening. I had noticed that Merle kept looking at me like he wanted to say something which is when I had looked away hoping to get across that there is nothing I want to say to him nor is there anything I want to hear from him.
"I know ya gonna ignore me but I don't need you to talk, I need ya to listen." I keep my head turned away from Merle. "He's grievin' I get that but he was wrong . Her dyin' was not your fault, she could 'ave died with or without Herschel's help. She bled out while Maggie was doin' a C-section and your decision to get her out the way was valid, ya fully believed that being inside was safer".
I still don't say anything which causes Merle to let out an aggravated sigh. To stop any more attempts I reach into my bag for my iPod and then turn the music up to drown everything out.
Daryl leads us to a small strip mall and pulls into the car park. As soon as Merle has stopped the car I immediately climb out and swing my bag onto my back. They all congregate around me.
Daryl holds his hand out to Carol. "Do ya 'ave that list". She hands him a piece of folded up paper. He reads what's on it then hands it back. "We should be able to find most of that here, if we need to we can make another stop on the way home". Carol rips the list in half and hands one half back to Daryl. "You with me", he directs that at Axel, "You go with Carol and Sophia". Oscars says okay and then they start walking towards the first shops entrance. Daryl grabs my hand and basically pulls me after him, "Merle, you stay out here".
"Will do".
We wait the desired amount of time to see if any Walkers come to the front from the sound of Daryl banging against the door, and then he's pushing open the door.
We split off into our two groups, Carol, Sophia and Oscar splitting off left and then I'm following behind Daryl and Axel as they go right. The sweep doesn't take long and we don't come across anything inside so they all just start filling bags with the things Carol wrote on her list. Daryl holds out the list for me but I don't take it instead I just run my eyes down the items on it, baby ointment, baby medicine, baby soap, maternity pads, wipes/cloths, formula. I'm guessing Carol's half has all the clothing, nappies etc on it.
I pick up a packet of wipes but I put them down just as quickly. I don't want to do this. It feels wrong somehow.
I turn and walk away from them, I snatch a bottle of water of a shelf as I make my way back outside. Merle stares at me but he doesn't say anything as I walk past him. I twist the cap of the water but I struggle to open it and then the next thing I know I'm throwing it as hard as I can across the carpark. As soon as it hits the tarmac the lid pops off and the water spills out.
"Ya gotta stop this shit". Daryl steps into my line of sight. "Ya actin' like this is all your fault and they see that. That's why Carl blames you, ya makin' him believe it and you need to stop thinkin' like ya gonna suffer the same fate. You aren't".
"You can't say that".
"Yes I can. because I believe it and you should to".
"Put ya fuckin' hands where I can see". I quickly pull out my gun as Merle shouts from the across the carpark. I zone in on where he is but whoever he's speaking to his hidden by the parked car.
Daryl runs past me and tells me to "stay put" as he goes. I listen to that instruction for about a second before following after him. I walk round the car to see who it is. It's a woman and she's looking petty worse for wear. I look over her, looking for the injury she must have and see it on her leg, I can't work out what's caused it but there is a lot of blood.
Daryl's crossbow is aimed right at her. "drop the sword and get up". She hesitates and looks between the three of us, her eyes land on my bump and stay there for a few seconds. "Now!"
She drops the sword and tries to stand but her leg doesn't hold her and she lands back onto her knee. I slip my gun back into it's holster and step closer to her. She holds up a hand silently telling me not to come too close.
"Who's done this to you?" She doesn't answer me but we need to know, what if they're near by, still looking for her.
"She asked you a question", I cast a backwards glance at Merle, he's scaring her. I push on his gun to make him lower it, he does albeit reluctantly.
I turn back to the injured woman. "We can help you, we have a doctor", close enough, "but we need to know if these people are still close." We can't help her if it puts all of us in danger.
She shakes her head. "They're dead".
"Can I talk to you?" Daryl nods at me and then I'm following him until we're out of ear shot.
"Ya want to help her", he ask before I can say anything.
"She's bleeding pretty badly Daryl. We can't just leave her out here like that. There's nothing around for miles".
"We don't know her or if she's dangerous".
"I just want to have her patched up, I'm not saying she come live with..."
"Hey, guys".
I turn to the sound of Merle's voice to find the unidentified woman lying on the ground, unconscious.