I.Q. 2.0
The rest of the impromptu Parikrama was practically without words, for the group of four misfits would chant on their beads and counters as they walked within the dust path, sometimes going as far as to shamelessly roll in it. It was during one of those dust baths that Zero had realised something amazing...
The Dust made him feel...cleansed and experiencing a bliss that went beyond anything he had ever experienced before.
But… for Christ's sake, it was finely ground sand!
But then, despite being in a layer of reality away from the overwhelming numbers of Pilgrims going over the tiny, Red,cream and blue hill top, it was clear that there was something in this dust, something that went beyond some naturally grounded minerals clogging his vent and getting into each and every crevices of his body.
Goverdhana hill was a wonder on conservation in itself, for the entire hill, save for the valley in the middle holding a bustling town, was surrounded by a sturdy barrier, protecting the natural beauty of the place. he could see Hogs, wild cows , dogs and monkey playing on the crest, at one place, Zero saw a temple, and got the instruction not to go there.
A Gaudiya-Vasishnava would rather die then to touch the supremely sacred hill whit his feet, for it was both Krishna himself, and his best of servants.
Needless to say, Zero, after some attempt to wrap his CPU around that particular truth had to, shamelessly, admit defeat.
Bathacharia had then told him, with a grin that literally reached his ears that the Divine realm was above and beyond the mundane laws of Physics governing this world.
Right… Right, this place was special. Like… even more special then his sun totting 'Mother, The gentle and childlike Omega, Karuna and family, and San.
Sanatan Das Babaji, ambulating skeleton with the funniest puns ever.
Eventually, after stopping at many pastime places of the Sri-Sri-Radha Krishna and bathing in ancient ponds; the group of saints...plus Zero arrived at punchari, the tail end of Govardhana hill. There, it was decided that it was time to rest, for their legs were tired, and the sun was close to its zenith.
Meaning...they were hungry and thirsty. And yet, none did anything to get any sustenance...save for a few clay jugs of water that dotted the way, an offering for he numerous pilgrims, no doubt…
Well, San could make food, but he was busy lounging on a chaise , listening to prabhupada's class about the glories of the month of Kartika.
For his part, the red failure just wanted to keep walking. He had already finished chanting the amount of rounds Mandodari had asked of him, and he loathed to remain in one spot for too long.
When he would move, he could forget his past and move on… and it was easier to ignore the ghostly image of X... and his scream of pain.
The same scream that haunted Zero at night, the same one he had heard when he would die...when Elpizo would kill him...the same...the same...
"Oh Krishna!" He heard a loud and Familiar voice break through his horrible memory. And just to make sure he was truly out, he felt a little divine, love-filled missile hit him...
No...it was just Mandodari. And she wore red instead of blue...and she was hugging him...
She was so soft...and so warm.
too warm.
"Swamini...your internal body temperature is too high, you need to cool down." Really fifty degrees was not normal for any creature.
He heard the saintly woman laugh, it was clear she was crying.
Usually, seeing tears in a girl's eyes would annoy Zero to no end. But for her...it just made him worried.
And indeed, she was wiping her tears away, a happy smile telling the red failure that everything was fine... but still, no one should have such red cheeks.
Privately, Zero... had appreciated the embrace, for it felt like a benediction… but his heart also told him to fall at her feet...and he would, if not for the fact that he was paralysed with...
Bliss? Awe? Reverence? Emotions that were beyond his meagre ability to emote?
All of the above?
…his lack of arms?
Probably.
"Zero, that's normal for me… but how are you? How did you manage to get out of..." Then her big blue-green eyes got bigger, and she began to address the hill as the picture of sweet anger.
"Oh...oh, you sweet jerk. You let this happen just so he could meet Sanatana Prabhu." she joyfully scolded the hill, to Zero's great wonder and amusement. "No… don't try to deny it, Krishna. I know you… I know what you can do."
Zero looked at where Mandodari was wagging her finger… he could only see the hill.
He tilted his head and changed his viewable spectrum...
He still couldn't see Krishna.
After the invisible Supreme personality of Godhead was duly chastised, Mandodari turned her attention back to Zero. Inspecting him with her glance.
"You look better." She commented.
Zero inclined his head as he took stock of the saintly woman.
She wore a black hoodie despite the fact that the sun was rather strong. And the world's most interesting umbrella.
It was upside down, inside the canopy was a river of stars. and the World's most perfect stick.
It must've been a shared opinion between them, For Mandodari touch the golden piece of Unknown Wood to Zero's head. "There, no more ghost."
"Thank you." he said, grateful despite his confusion.
"Do you like the umbrella?" Mandodari asked the reploid, moving the mesmerising tool up and down.
"Yes..."
"What do you like about it?" Mandodari asked again.
"It protects you." Zero elaborated. He had no idea why, but he didn't want this intriguing woman to be burned by the sun… or drenched by the upcoming rain.
He cared about her… without any rhymes or reason… save maybe that she resembled X somewhat.
"It can protect you too. You just need to get under it. Goverdana hill's God's umbrella. Krishna-ji held him up on his left pinky fingers for seven day and night as King Indra tried to drown the whole of Vrindavan what eh rains of devastation. But he failed, since, you know, Krishna's God and his Love for his vraja-vasis would never let him loose… so what happened to you?"
Ah, a report...
Zero then proceeded to explain his bizarre adventure. From the nightmare, the ghost… X's repeated appearance… or what he thought was X, meeting Sanatana Prabhu, the ice cream... meeting with Balabhadra and the black Vanamali Swami...
"Wow...Ok, That's like, Vrindavan's flexing hard on you, my friend." Mandodari informed the reploid as they sat under the shade of a tree by yet another reservoir of water. " I remember my first time visiting vraja-dham. nothing that intense happened, thankfully. I did find my stick and got a Gopi skirt by this one shop owner by the name of Lalita by radha-Tila. oh, and I saw a sadhu doing a 64 dandavat parikrama and the Russian prabhu doing Dandavat parikrama of Radha-kund and all the temple there. My second Visit to india tough… but anyway, that a story for another time."Prema-Sarovara, she had called it, a lake of divine tears.
"I don't understand how a location could… 'flex' on me… but I supposed I did meet with many interesting beings."
"I'll say… and you're talking more, that's for sure."
Zero paused… right, he did feel… more open, for lack of better word. Not only that but… he felt better, as if he had finally reached the end of a long and dreary tunnel.
Well, he still missed X and still longed for his partner, wishing for him to be here in Vraja...but, It was not as bad as before.
'Am I… Am I betraying him? Would he… would he forgive me if I moved on?' Zero wondered, his good mood evaporating as guilt flooded his being. '... I can't let him go… Not yet… Not… no...'
Then… Swamini Mandodari held her stomach and made a face. Saving Zero from drowning in an ocean of shame "Oh Krishna… must be noon."
"Swamini?" Zero asked, his hair flaring to detect what was wrong with the glowing woman.
Her temperature was too high, and by her blood sugar, Zero knew she needed to eat and...
"You have a fever... a very high fever. You need to see a medic right now." he informed her; doing his best to ignore the hallucination.
He didn't need to say who it was.
Mandodari, instead of looking properly concerned, simply gave a belly laugh.
Her face lit up, her eyes closed as her glorious smile reached them.
"Oh Prabhu, I'm fine! I'm just running hotter than most humans nowadays." She informed the reploid. " I… Nothing short of Krishna can kill me now. And I received a fiery legacy from a friend." Here usually jovial countenance turned sombre. "You don't have to worry about me, Zero. You won't lose this problem anytime soon."
"You are not a problem to me, swamini."
Zero was about to ask Mandodari to elaborate when Sanatana intruded.
When the skeleton noticed the saintly woman, he gasped with sheer joy and fell at her feet. Uttering the same prayer he did when meeting Vanamali and Balabhadra… and another one that escaped's Zero's translator.
Mandodari also let her rotund body hit the dusty ground of Vrindavana, belting out the same prayers before she began to roll in the vent clogger.
"Hey, Guru-ji Mandodari, I didn't expect to see you here!" Sanatana addressed the saint. "How was the trip?"
"It was great. Some turbulence, but I still managed to chant all my rounds and I have no jet lag." she informed the skeletal Vaishnava who just kept smiling... "I arrived… oh… um... Ok, so we found Zero last Wednesday, so… ah..."
"Three days ago… you revived me three days ago." The red reploid informed Mandodari.
Mandodari appeared embarrassed by this statement. "Ah… Right. and this took plenty of my bandwidth. I'm sorry I didn't contact you, Sanatana, I had… well, the Montreal old Mataji Ashram finally collapsed around me. there where not casualty, thankfully, but now, I don's have a place to stay, on top of more temple politic drama."
"Oh, eww." San cringe. "Main reason why I moved away too/ I know it got better eventually, but my false Ego still has a few bones to pick."
"Huh, you'll need to leave those old bones soon then, you can''t carry moochi thing tot he supremely pure abode."
"Yeah, I know. but short of baiting a group of Monkey"
"Please don't, those poor creatures have enough on their plates as it is." Mandodari said as she exposed her soft heart.
Zero remembered those monkeys, those where in groups, would fuck wherever, steal whatever and where just… a bunch of screaming menace, and nothing could stop them either.
"So, are you the one who fixed Joe?"
"Joe?"
"yeah, you know. Johnny-five-alive!"
It was clear that Mandodari's brain was… and there we are!
"Oh, your'e talking about Zero!"
"Who? Guru-ma, I hear you say nothing."
"I said… right." The woman looked miffed, and Sanatan's usual grin fell.
"Oh dear, I'm so sorry, Guru-ma. I couldn't help myself." The skeleton apologised, going as far as to fall at her feet.
"hey, it's… Hare Krishna." the saint folded her palms as she blushed in shame. "Sanatana, it's fine, my brain's missing neurons and you're fond of puns… and 's name's just too good of an opportunity to skip."
Sanatana's creepy blue eyes grew wide, then he bowed again.
"Once again, Swamini, this was masterful. Now, what did you do to fix him? from what I'd gather, our man got toasted!"
Mandodari shrugged."I didn't do anything just… googling how to repair a reploid core and just chanting Hare Krishna." She admitted as she scratched her head. "Didn't find anything, other than some badly written cosplay tutorials. Obviously, it was Uttara who repaired Zero. She even re-melted His old core into the new one... how does it feel?" she asked.
"It's function is more than adequate. It's like new, to be honest." Zero admitted. "How did you manage to make an Energene?" he asked.
Mandodari averted her eyes... "Uttara fed you... you know...like a mama bird her young." His red cheeks turned even redder as Zero remembered a particular conversation he had with X over bird matrimony and the sacrifice they would do...
It was one of those conversations that would happen like clockwork. He would always have an interest in ornithology when under Marc Cain's tutelage...
'I will never hear this, anymore...' A wave of unwelcome emotion flooded him, and yet Zero still managed to remain neutral in all of this.
Then...after some silence, he realised that he had once again become the centre of attention.
Sanatana strongly patted his mangled shoulder, somehow, his skinless face managing to convey a surprising amount of compassion.
"C'mon Jon... Let's go take Prasadam." He invited me. "I got your favourite."
"I don't have a favourite."
"Ice scream...fifty flavours, all for you." The skeleton whispered conspiratorially.
Zero would've loved to decline, but...
how could he... He didn't want to stay alone...
He... Didn't want to think... He
... Lost everything...
Back in Mayapur, Omega had come to the stage of acceptance. Zero didn't want to speak to him.
Oh, he knew his twin wasn't dead from excessive damage, a certain Ishani was sending video reports everyday.
Zero was moving, he was walking and talking. But sometimes, a deep melancholy would crush him.
Mother Mukhara had explained to the murderous reploid that this was depression, and that it was normal for Zero to go through this. He just needed time, love, and understanding.
Omega would admit that he had never seen someone with depression, but it sounded terrible. Especially after Yavata had explained to him in excruciating details what it entails. With Karuna and Mukhara's help, of course.
This just served to fan the spark of the God of Destruction's protective propensity toward Zero...
Zero was broken, inside and out. His outside and internals may be somewhat fixed; but his inside, his emotional body was struggling. In other words, Zero had been mortally wounded, and he now had to heal. But unlike how their bodies would be repaired, the subtle body took time, and one false move could make Zero tumble again.
He will get better… with time, prayer, and Krishna Mercy.
And the easiest source of Mercy came not from God but from his Servants.
And thus, after Omega's first disastrous first visit to the temple, the G- the highly destructive reploid had learned how to give respect to everyone on his way there. Whether an animal, a plant, or even the numerous mosquitoes… until he saw those blood suckers harass Yavata and Mukhra more than they had any right to...
And so far, God didn't seem to mind.
So… Omega could not kill humans, animals, or bugs… but he could kill mosquitoes.
It was better than nothing, and killing those diminutive drones was definitely harder then it seemed.
Still, he had to be sneaky since Devotees didn't like to see anything suffer.
Where was he? Right. He began to pray to God everyday for Zero's recovery. And as Kripa had told him, serving Krishna's devotees and pleasing Gauranga by the constant chanting of the Hare Krishna Maha-Mantra would make Him more favourable.
And this was what Omega was doing, giving all the results of cleaning the trash, petting the cows, and chanting the Maha-Mantra to Zero since...
Since he did care about him, despite the fact that he had no idea who he really was. Hell, Zero might still despise him since Omega was not X.
Nevertheless, Omega loved Mayapur. Never in his life had he seen such a vibrant and bright city in his life. It was filled with people of all colour, provenance, trades, and ages.
He loved to listen to them and ask questions, he loved learning from them about the world and everything else Weil had sworn to destroy. He also loved to learn about Karuna-Sindhu's family and those he cared about.
Mukhara was his mother, she was also the appointed ruler of Mayapur and the main councillor of the King of Bharata-Varsha, meaning she served everyone there. She could hear the ten desires of the living entities and was a very good book distributor, and she also spoke all languages in the world, a trait she had given to Karuna.
She got four of her limbs eaten by demons in a place called Old Hell, and those demons became devotees of Krishna.
Karuna-Sindu was Mukhara and another woman's son. He was about to turn twenty and he was also extremely powerful. He loved God with all of his heart and his only goal of life was to please him. He had a few friends like Gargacharya das Brahmachari, a tall human from Mikado,, Ken...a guy who had no face and the second most beautiful woman in the whole world... The first one was Srimati-Radharani.
Seriously, she looked amazing beside Krishna and her eight girlfriends.
She was a princess from the moon planet. and very old too.
it was then that Omega learned that normal humans aged, got old and died and that, no, the wrinkled ones where not a different type of humans, just old ones at the end pf their lifes.
There was also a little Rabbit girl that was attending Kamika Devi Dasi... A certain Tewi.
One was from the moon, the other from earth. Meaning the super beautiful moon princess was an alien from a rock… that really wasn't a rock but a heavenly planet filled with numerous essences of trees and plants.
he was also married to Yavata and showed his love for him as publicly as he could without being… cringe, as he said.
Apparently, Yavata had almost gotten kidnapped by the now defunct Japanese special stargazing group for nefarious purpose, and panicked, Karuna had proposed in the middle of a busy airport as Yavata was about to board a plain to places unknown, probably to more pain and torture.
This worked, for Yavata, thinking quickly, played along so wall that it moved a liberal senator to tears, and the two where officially married.
Yavata… was supposed to be adopted into the family as Karuna's brother, funny how that panned out.
in private, karuna was still pretty cuddly with him, holding his hands and just being vey, very gay in general… and scary like a Yandere to ward off anyone wanting a piece of Semi-god to bring home.
it worked, despite the controversy it triggered.
but such was life.
Then there were the two ghosts that live in Yavata's head, he told the so-called god of destruction that he used to have more ghosts, but that they all had been driven out by Nava-Yauvana das and his Girlfriend, Nalini Devi Dasi.
Apparently those without a body could not marry, but they could still serve one another. Those two were the internal guardians of Yavata, and would drive away any ghost that tried to take advantage of the Yaksha.
"And then there's you!" Omega joyfully addressed the man on the screen. He was a fresh young man with golden cat-like eyes, cat ears, very black, soft curly hair that was tied in a high ponytail, and a very caring smile. In the background, the of the newly born kittens met Omega's audio. "I never thought humans could be so nice and... I never met a psychologist before, are those always so nice?" He asked with a tilt of his head.
It was raining in Mayapur. And while it didn't matter for Karuna, Omega had more than enough of the rain and the mud, thank you very much.
Mukhara had given the reploid the room at the very top of her house. She warned him that it may get a bit too hot during the spring and summer season, but that he could still sleep on the roof when the weather permitted.
Oh and that her home was protected from lightning by a vajra-guard. A few tall towers that would catch the terrifying bolt before it dared to strike the roof, and Omega's room.
Inside this room was a soft mattress covered with a clean bed sheet, a few windows to let the fresh air in with a screen to keep the mosquitoes out, a commode, a bathroom, and an empty altar.
Omega had bought it in the temple Gift store some very pretty pictures of the Absolutely MASSIVE Pancha-tattva. (Advaita, Nityananda, Sri-Krishna-Chaitania Mahaprabhu, Gadadhara, Srivasa Thakura), Then Radha-Madhava and their eight Sakhis and finally Lord Mayapur-Narashimhadeva.
For the half-lion, half-man, Omega hadn't held back, he bought the holographic, back lit picture with a golden frame that lit in the dark.
The reploid had at first desired a five-metal deity, but Mukhara told him that he had to start with chanting Hare Krishna and start worshipping the picture, and, when the time would be right, the Buddha of Carpentry would make her ward a custom murtis if he was still inclined.
Needless to say, Omega took a vow to follow all of the Hare Krishna principles. Most of them would naturally follow them, so he changed it to not killing anything as long as it didn't harm a devotee, hunting down perverts who would prey on women, and protect all matajis with his life. Not spend all his money on useless shit, protect the cows and... well, the no intoxication part was a bit hard to substitute since nothing much could mess with a reploid.
It was a nice and breezy room, and it was easy for him to go out and bask in the sun when the sun was out, and Mukhara told him he could also plug in any outlet, for she had her own private generator.
She had also gotten the ancient reploid a big cell phone with a sim card...
The microcomputer was alright, but Omega had more interest in the tiny chip that gave him access to the internet.
Basically, plenty of information about humans, but after five minutes and finding more about reproduction and care then he cared, Omega figured that he could also call people, listen to music, and holy books.
Actually, any books he wanted, but he was a Hare Krishna, and thus would read everything about Krishna and Krishna's devotee's.
a mere human would never have a life long enough to read everything.
Then...he managed to contact Mandodari but after talking to her and Uttara (she was so nice and sweet...and protective of Zero). She had also dared to scold Omega for how insensitive he had been and for the destruction he had rained down in his prison... Because this was the best way to get killed and she didn't want another son practically dead.
She had called Omega a son… as he had soon come to learn that that type of scolding was done out of love… just like how Omega wanted to beat the tar out of Zero.
He paradoxically wanted to kill him for almost dying on Omega... it was a rather peculiar experience for the A… for the reploid.
Then Mandodari, the ugly-cute and very red woman had told Omega that he should contact Phalguni, a psycho therapist... and Omega did.
He… liked Mandodari. Not the way he liked Karuna, Yavata, and Mukhara… and definitely not how he liked Zero.
No… this amazing being had a different like...
Nevertheless, he had contacted the man... and they had spoken about many things.
Oh, and he was the husband of Radha-Shyamasundara, Mukhara's Godsister. And she was the one who had the eggs who then hatched into a litter of kittens.
Omega had checked the internet… and no, he had the right to be baffled, for cats where mammals and mammals didn't lay eggs… except for Platipies.
Phalguni had explained to Omega that Radha-Shyamasundara Devi Dasi was a Kasha, or a spirit from Hell that was tasked to drag the sinners to Yamaraja. And that she could take either the shape of a flaming cart, a cat… or a woman.
And he… was neither a human or an animal, he was a servant of Sri-Vishnu that had been tasked to bring some very special souls on this earthly plane of existence... and this was how he appeared to the general population.
Uh...
It was now very late in the morning. And Omega had finally run out of things to talk about. He was still concerned about Zero though.
Then...
"Say, Phalguni - do you think you could talk to Zero too?" The Reploid asked the amazing being. "I'm happier and... less worried. And Zero's... Zero's not happy."
"I know." Phalguni's cat ears drooped. "Believe me, Omega - I am well aware of your twin's situation." He sadly stated. "I've been following him since Mukhara contacted me four days ago. He's fluctuating a lot, he wants to get better, and he's doing his best but… It will take time." The cat-eared therapist admitted.
"How long?" Omega asked.
"It can take up to six months to years... and some never really recover." Phalguni warned. " What he went through was extremely traumatic, Omega… and if what you told me was true, then he may never be a hundred percent recovered."
The red reploid grunted. Not really happy to hear that but still appreciating the fact that the truth was not hidden for him. "Will Narashimha-deva help him?" He asked...
From what he had read, the beautiful Lion-Lord of Mayapur was especially merciful, having healed cancers, healed dying babies, and freely given protection to those about to die...
And yes, He had even told one of His Pujari to chill, He would not kill him…
yet.
From his tablet, he heard Phalguni chuckling. "Sorry, my Friend told me what you wanted to do… and Yes, Sri-Hari really is a big softy." He admitted. "Really, some even call Him the servant of his servants." Phalguni proclaimed.
"I know! I heard about this in class today!" Omega happily chirped. " Udharana-Data Prabhu was telling us how Bhakti was about out-serving God... But since Krishna is God, we can't win... but because we can't give it up, we also can't lose!"
Those words made the black haired youth bark in laughter. "Yes, while the materialist and Atheist tries to ignore Him, Krishna will still serve them as the unknown 'cosmic power' no physicist can explain, and through the Gunas."
"But we know better!" Omega smirked.
"Yes... we do." Even the psychotherapist agreed. "Alright, Omega. It was a pleasure talking to you. I know you are frustrated with your ribbon, but I'm sure once you learn how to control your anger and aggression, you'll be able to remove it yourself. Now, I have some other patients to take care of." he bid off. "Hare Krishna my friend."
"Haribol!" Omega waved off at the not really human being.
He really likes him... and he hoped Zero would get a chance to speak to him. It made Omega feel better about himself, even if the therapist had informed him that his killing spree and aggression toward everything was neither healthy nor wanted.
Oh well, another challenge!
Omega got up and made his way downstairs. While he had to control his aggression, Phalguni also told him it was alright to wrestle and fight with those who were equal in strength to him... And Karuna, since he could hold back.
The crimson reploid doubted the last part, for the only reason he was still alive was due to this… spell card rule and nothing else… since the plant-like being had trashed his body with a glee only Omega thought he would feel.
Still, it had been the most fun he'd had in a while.
Suddenly, the sound of a taxi van coming up the road met Omega's audio, and the reploid remembered that they had been waiting for Karuna's sister, a certain Komala Devi Dasi. The powerful plant-like Vaishnava had warned Omega that she was very powerful and could control other people's emotions.
Oh...and that she was not human. She was a spirit whose body was sixty-six masks... or something like that.
Apparently, there were many beings that could qualify as reploids.
Omega went to his window, the rain was still pouring down with less force than this morning. And sure enough, a very muddy van pulled up in the driveway, Mukhara (under an umbrella) and Karuna (no umbrella) were already out. Yavata was still inside the house, probably cooking soup or something.
Karuna-Sindhu walked to the car door, followed by his mother. And out of the van came out a woman with purplish pink hair. She had pink eyes and quite a few Japanese masks floated around her. She wore a blue japanese dress decorated with some sort of pink flowers and she had a pair of wooden sandals over a pair of white socks. And as Karuna and Mukhara had warned, she was quite powerful... but not like Karuna.
His warning system was quiet, but Omega knew from experience that those who were in contact with God, Krishna..or any of his bonnafide forms held a power beyond anything comprehensible.
The otherworldly girl looked right at Omega, catching his glance in her emotionless face, a woman's mask floating beside her face.
And then the mask changed to that of a golden one...of Sri-Krishna Chaitania... and a great hope flooded every fibres or Omega's build.
Yes... everything will be fine, everything will work out in the end... and Zero will be fine... He'll get better.
He felt miserable...
His whole body felt... so heavy...
He felt so empty inside.
Zero... had tried to stay strong, to but up a normal, absolutely fine front, a brave face... to man up and just power trough whatever feeling he felt.
he'd always felt his missing better half, X was everything Zero wasn't, everything Zero aspired to be. and he...
Yes... Zero could say that He'd loved the Robot master more then he cared for his own life.
and now...
this half... this missing half was confirmed to be gone.
Gone for good.
Outside the rain fell...
He felt like the weather...he wanted to cry again... but he couldn't.
He had no tears… Unlike X...
It was funny, really. It took this very awkward conversation about how Uttara had fed him on his first night to finally realise that... that he would never see X again.
Sure, every time he destroyed Omega, X would sacrifice himself to purify the mother elf... but he would be back after Ragnarok.
And when Zero would remember... sometimes he would just forget about the whole Resistance and just speak to him... Open up about everything, telling him about the repetitions...
He couldn't remember if X believed him... but he remembered the night he and the now intangible blue legend would pass...
And sometimes... sometimes Zero would ignore Ciel and Copy-X in favor of the Original. The red failure would find him, take his body and...
And he would let his battery run out if Harpuia didn't get at him first.
But with every death, X would be back, Zero would be back...
And now that all was over... X was well and truly...
It was... there was this pain... that didn't come from his body... it was a hole that would not close... a grievous wound that...
They said time heals... But Zero knew time also killed.
"It's alright Yi... Things will get better, I promise." Yashoda spoke soothing words as she lovingly ran her delicate fingers through his hair. "You will survive... as painful as it it, he would rather you fight and live then die of a broken heart."
It was a new morning... and Zero barely had any idea how he managed to come back to Mandodari's and Uttara's shared flat... everything was but a grey blur with nothing but pain...and the reality that everything truly was gone!
It was gone...
it was all gone...
He could move on… and yet...
He had lost everything... and this time, it was for good.
Ciel was as good as dead... for she would only find the Shard that held the vile will of Albert only to die later... yet another suicide he had been forced to witness.
Pandora and her brother... would they even exist?
And Giro… he would have a very short life... and he wouldn't have the power to save his twins.
But... this was not the first time he had lost everything. When he had sealed himself for the second time, this had been when all he knew had disappeared. He had woken up to a post-apocalyptic future in which X had been dead for a good while, existing as a ghost... and people had moved on!
And it was not the first time X had died but now...
Now it was over... it truly was over... he was free... He was free...
he had no idea what to do about this freedom. he had no mission control to guide him, no navigator, no one to tell him where to go and what to do wiht his life.
in essence, he had no reason to right, no goal, no aim... nothing but his pain and grief.
And Omega was free...
Omega...
He clenched his teeth... in a rare show of anger... and even this small burst of emotion seemed to drain him more than what was permissible.
"It's alright, my son. It will pass... everything is temporary, and everything will get better soon." Yashoda assured him. "You are sad and suffering... for now. Nothing lasts... and you will get better, my son. Just be patient"
"..." he had no strength to even speak or move... was he sick?
No... everything was in his head... it was just him that was unable to move one with his goddamn grief...
"Zero... No... Hou yi. Just change how you think... don't let those dark thoughts take over your mind. Fight, my warrior!" Yashoda spoke barely above a whisper. "You... You have been wounded for so long, my son… You are not alone in this fight, we are all with you.
Fight...
Fight...
Why? He tried to speak... but everything... he had no energy despite a fully charged battery. He had been fighting forever... without a break, without stopping. Violence had been his only recourse… and now he wanted to sleep...
What else was there for a failure? After all, he had failed the most important person in his life...
'But… If I give up... how would Mandodari feel? And how about Uttara? And San?'
'And... Why do I care? I'm useless to them...'
The image of Mandodari, her face and eyes red as she cried and sobbed, met Zero's cloudy mind... Uttara, weeping over his corpse... Yashoda, begging him not to leave...
X... no, he would feel nothing, for he was already gone!
The soul would be somewhere else... and Zero didn't have to ask where.
Maybe... he would follow his lover?
Hell didn't seem so bad then... but then, after all the sacrifices X had done, it was clear he would go to Heaven while Zero plummeted (again) to Hell.
Weil would win...
'Let him win...'
Sigma would win.
'Let them all win... for they didn't fail...'
"No... Zero, Zero, listen to me." He heard Phalguni's voice in his head again. " Crap...He Bhagavan, give me strength...Don't listen to them... remember, Sanatana Prabhu has invited you over for a movie night. He has a movie about Srimati Radharani, the personification of love and her sacred lake... Do you really want to miss that? Keep fighting, mighty warrior, there is nothing in the world worth killing yourself over! FIGHT!"
'No... he won't be there to see it... He will be gone soon... There's nothing for you here... you're weak, Zero... So weak... just let it go and die like the dog you are...'a voice spoke… child-like and oh, so cruel…
he knew this Voice, didn't he?
'Zero, don't listen to him! You are better than a mere dog. You are the glorious servant of Srimati-Radharani... and Radha-Ji won't let you waste this precious form of yours because a drop of urine is trying to bring you down!'
'Just die... there's nothing left for you but oblivion.'
" I don't want to die..." He realised... he felt empty, and hollow... and his mind kept whispering promises of relief through oblivion.
But... He... no... no...
NO!
He could not...He would not...
"I... Need help..." He managed to force through his lips... "I... Can't..." it was painful to admit... "I... I can't do it... alone..."
He was weak... He was a coward... a failure... And he was unable to recover by himself.
And he wanted to live... to recover... Despite the fact that he really didn't deserve it.
He had... He had another reason to live, his mind be damned!
He would live... For X... And for... For Mandodari... For Radharani and Krishna…
he had nothing to lose, he'd seen it all, did it all. this was the only option worth trying now.
"Good... Then fight, Hou yi… just fight. We will win for you, we will… hah… I mean, We will help you, we will fight with you, you won;t have to sacrifice anything, just let us help you. Just hang in there, help is on the way." And after those words of encouragement, Yashoda began to chant the Hare Krishna Maha-Mantra.
Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna, Krishna Krishna, Hare Hare
Hare Ram, Hare Rama, Rama Rama, Hare Hare...
Zero closed his eyes... blocking out the sight of the blurry and colourless altar, focusing on the divine sound vibration.
No... He would fight... he would fight... He had a reason to exist... He had a mission... He could not… would not give up this fight…
And he would win… not a lone win, but with a team.
A bit later, Sanatana came in, and seeing Zero's wretched state, ran out to get Mandodari, only to learn that the woman had left with Uttara and Nandarani to drive the overwhelmed Ishani back to Ukraine.
"Nandarani... can't you go faster?" Uttara asked the driver, all hunched and cramped up in her too-small seat.
"No can do, home sli- Queeny. The weather's terrible, and I wouldn't want you to suffer a crash."
"yeah... your Prabhu won't be happy to learn that his wife and baby died because a sinful raven-crow could not wait to return to Vraja-Mandala." Uttara awkwardly stated as she jittered in her seat. In the back, Mandodari slept, lulled by the movement of the car. he neck braced by a shamelessly Indian neck pillow. something she got at the airport.
Something was going on with Zero, the bird just knew it...
Yesterday, he had returned to their shared flat like a widower who had just lost his wife, he looked tired, and while he never smiled since arriving in vraja, his overly neautral face told the one who ate a sun-god that... he was upset, but put on a brave face. but... this brave face didn't last, and the crushing sorrows that followed slowly but surely sapped whatever life was in her son, he didn't even protest when she was preening and feeding him. It was like... whatever fight he had was gone.
At first, she had thought Infinity was just exhausted after the eight and a half hour walk around Goverdana hill, and San being San.
But this lethargy had remained even when she woke him up. There had been even less protest than yesterday when she bathed him. He didn't even stand up!
Then she had made a mistake... a big mistake; she let him be. She just left her baby boy on the couch and went with Mandodari and Ishani for a Japa walk, thinking Ananta needed some time away from her!
Then this Japa walk turned into a goodbye party since Ishani couldn't handle Vraja. And this goodbye party turned into a driving party because they wanted to see the saint off... and Uttara had followed them since Ishani, despite how weird she was, was still a good friend to her.
And she had let her in India despite the red tape. (She had already told the officials that she was the empress and thus had the right to travel, an if she wanted to go at the supreme motherland, then only Bhagavan could stop her!)
And now... it was already late morning and the rain had not let up yet. It was so humid and cold... Kind of like her Ananta felt like.
Her only saving grace had been to have plugged in the Egg Generator into his system. He would not run out of energy...and Uttara could easily monitor him.
He was sad... like, a very huge cloud had entered his heart and ripped it to shreds.
He was mourning his mate... and he had realised that he had lost everything.
Uttara had contacted Sanatana Das, asking the Ebotien to go and check up on her son, for he had also lived in a similar situation.
Birds of a feather always flock together, for they knew the same things and would not start a war.
And yet... she knew how a mated person would go through once their mate had died... it could go two ways...
Suddenly, Madodari woke up with a start. "STOP! STOP THE CAR! STOP THE CAR!" She half-slurred, half-yelled.
Caught by complete surprise, Nadarani had no choice but to comply, stomping on the brakes with all of her might as she sent her passengers careening forward.
Thankfully, all wore their seat belts.
"Hey Pudge! What's the big-" But before the expectant blond could finish her question, Mandodari was already out of the car and into the downpour.
Then... without much of a forewarning, one of San's shortcuts opened... right in front of the Goswamini. And indeed, the skeleton got out... his eternal grin had changed with a very prominent frown.
'Oh no.' Uttara followed suit, entering the freezing rain as she stopped her way to Zero's friend in Vraja.
"-SO happy I found you, Mataji!" Sanatana addressed the human Vaishnavi. "Jonny's... Zero's state just got a whole lot worse..."
Uttara's breath caught in her throat... she knew something like this would happen.
"How worse?" Mandodari managed to ask over the din of the downpour.
"He's not moving, he's barely reacting and... He Radhe, He looks like a dying man again and... He asked for help." San spoke with great emphatie " Listen, I know a warrior when I see one, and for them to ask for help means they're beyond the point of death..."
"Unyu! It's all my fault!"
"Ah Kalifice!" Mandodari swore. "That door leads back home, does it?" She asked, as she already stood by the threshold.
"Yes!"
Mandodari bolted into one of San's Shortcuts, quickly followed by Uttara and the honorary Vraja-vasi.
When they emerged, it was in the hallway at the top of the stairs, the front door of their rented flat was open and...
Inside the pleasant room, Zero laid unmoving, his head in Yashoda's lap. His eyes were dull and unseeing...but his lip kept vibrating as he followed Uttara's old mother's recitation of the Hare-Krishna Maha-Mantra.
" Oh Krishna... thank you for not leaving my son in such a trying time.' and how!
She never seen someone so... damaged!
His body had been a mess, and it truly was a miracle that she'd managed to somehow fit it. but him subtle body...'That's it, after Kartika, i'm bringing him to mom, he need his grandma!'
She practically flew to Zero's side... But the moment her Tsukumogami-like son layed eyes on Mandodari, some life returned to his eyes.
"M... Ma...n...do..." Oh Krishna-Bhagavan, what happened to his voice box?!
"Yes, Zero. I'm here, how may I serve you" Mandodari said as she kneeled beside the tsukumogami.
Once again, Uttara's son tried to speak, but his voice failed him, only the helpless fear in his one remaining eyes was enough to clue everbody in as to what was happeneing.
He was being attack at his most vulnerable.
Uttara bristled, puffing her visible feathers as she growled. using her thirsd eyes, she could see the boyis demon's bear claw in her Ananta's heart.
She grabbed the paw, only to realised that this was merly a hat, and the demons escaped the grasp of the troublesome flames of hell.
'Oh, just you wait, you little filthy, sinful snake-like snack. once we get you out of your dank little hole, I will fly you myself to Yamaraja! mark my word, spoken in front of Jagannath, the Lord of all Universes!"
Then she turned to Uttara. "Uttara, please unroll my bed in the middle of the room... I need to work on him. "
Uttara didn't even ask why she needed the whole bed... so she just laid the mattress on the floor and kept a pillow.
Yashoda took the small (for them) form of her wounded son to it gently, laying him down on his back, his head cradled by a pillow.
Mandodari then grabbed the box containing the shoes of their spiritual master. Putting it on her head before removing the holy relics and applying them to Zero's own.
Then she put them back where they belonged, in the silver box.
"Alright... Zero, listen to me." She addressed the languid tsukumogami. "IYou just got attacked by a Hermite... he Bhagavan, I never tought this would happen, in Sri-vrindavan Dham. but Vrindavan is about to disapear from our collective visions so it;s not that supr- Mando, focus- ok, so your douchbag of a hermit when and struck you while you where down, Uttara scared him off, thank, Uttara-""No problem-" " but the asshole... like the guys a wet, wet fart and Bhagavan won't let this offence slid, like how dare he do that- so he dammaged your subtle body but me and Sanatana das babaji are level three Reiki master... actually, San and I are like level five since we serve the servants of the source of the universal cosmic energy, Krishna, and by his mercy, we will be fixing you up. you just have to believe, Zero. we can't do anything if you don't let us work, you understand?" She explained the best she could, desperation taintinig her words. "Believing in something beyond your sense perception is not blind fate, you don't trick your brain into thinking a placebo is working, you just give God carte-blanche to pull crazy stunt because you won;t deny it's His amazing doing, you hear? let Him work trough us, don't push us or Krishna's love away, and I swear upon the sacred shoes of my spiritual master that tommorow's gonna be a whole lot brighter, okay? please, let Krishna's love in, He can's... He's crying for you."
Well... Madodari was crying now, she was always super sensitve despite ell the bullying she got.
but then, the mark of a pure devotee was their butter-soft heart.
"Ra...dha?" Zero managed to murmur, his dark gaze never leaving Mandodari's face.
"Yes! You're right Zero, Srimati-Radharani is Krishna supreme potency, and we are all be Her instrument... Oh Zero, just let Sri-Radha heal your heart. Can you do that? Can you accept her?"
Zero made a noise at the back of his throat... a kind of weak gurgle dying man would do to convey something.
Once again, Uttara swore to Bhagavan and Bhagavati that she would personally drag the warlock by the hair down to the path of hell, letting the bugs and hell hounds bit him as the sun cook his entrails on his way to be judge by Yamaraja and Citra-gupta. and knowing Mukhara and Karuna, this evil sennin's reing was at it's twilight.
Twilight... the time the Narashima-Avatara descended to rip apart the great demon Hiraniyakasipu whit His lotus petal-soft nails.
"Alright, now I'm warning you; you may get emotional...like, you may want to cry, shout, laugh or sleep. If that happens, allow it and don't hold back... got it?"
"Ah...yes...swamini."
A small smile tugged at Uttara's lips. Yes... He was in good hands.
She got up and left the room before Mandodari even had the chance to ask her, for she knew the energies at play were subtle and her presence may disturb them.
