"Pursue Voyager." Mechanical eyes watched the intrepid class ship from a view screen. "It's time we speak."


"Come on."

The Captain's hushed words made her heart flutter. Her hand was soft, skin warmed by the fire as it took hers, and she couldn't help but wonder if the rest of her felt the same way.

"Computer end program."

Seven barely noticed the command or the program as it fizzled away. Her eyes stayed on Kathryn.

The Captain let go of her hand as the doors opened to Voyager's hall and she stepped out, slipping her hand into her pocket.

The hall lights dimmed to sixty percent usage in the evening and remained so until the morning shift started. At night, one could walk the entire length of the of the ship and not pass anyone. Yet, the Captain kept their familiarities to a staunch minimum when they weren't protected by the privacy of a closed door.

They stopped at the turbolift and Kathryn pressed the button to call it to their floor. With her gaze down she stepped on as soon as the door opened.

"Deck 3."

The doors closed and their arms brushed where they stood side by side. The look on the Captain's face was enigmatic, her demeanor somber but acceptant. A shiver rushed down Seven's back at the Captain's odd silence. 'She thinks I don't know what I want. That my intentions are indecisive. I have to show her they're not.' The doors opened and they strode down the hall in silence, every step arousing Seven's desire as the Captain's quarters came into view.

Sensing the Captain's presence, the door to her quarters opened without command.

"How long did you regenerate?"

"3 hours 46 minut—Enough." Seven found her words through thickening breaths as the Captain peeled off her jacket and tossed it over her desk. She huffed a sigh and started to the replicator; Seven turning the opposite way, venturing to the bed.

"…water."

Seven smirked at the Captain's grumbled order to the replicator, and disappeared around the partition that separated the sleeping area from the living room, a neatly made bed on the other side. Kathryn wasn't lying about not being able to sleep, the sheets were untouched.

Laying down seemed strange but the majority of sexual situations were conducted from this position.

Seven touched the bed and slowly sat. She was just here watching the Captain sleep, but tonight she wanted something more. A kiss was only the beginning of further exploration, used as a prerequisite for a sexual encounter. That's what her research proved. The archived information didn't mention much about how she'd know when to initiate the encounter, but it didn't need to, the "urges" were enough. The need to feel the Captain drove her desire again and again.

Humans were aroused by the sight of bare skin, for some reason. Would some primitive, biological factor in her brain enliven at the Captain's naked form?

The Captain mentioned early into her stay on Voyager that because humans valued privacy, the act of removing one's clothes was intimate in nature. Seven couldn't relate to feeling shame at the sight of an exposed body, but quickly realized it would turn many heads if she suddenly decided to abandon her biosuit and walk the halls in her natural state. For her it was the kiss, feeling the Captain in her grasp, that made her body flush with heat and that ache start between her legs.

But the moment was always snatched away, by interruptions—often menial—calling the Captain to duty, by Kathryn's apprehension, or recently, by her fear. The constant cycle was maddening, frustration would simmer in Seven's chest. Just one night she wanted to have the Captain in her arms and not be disturbed. Chakotay could handle captain duties while she had Kathryn to herself. She suspected that's what he wanted anyway, to be the captain of this ship.

Seven took a chance. She laid on the bed, stiff at first but relaxing more as she rolled to her back.

"Strange." She watched the ceiling, the smell of Kathryn amongst the sheets easing her slightly. If she focused she could picture the alcove behind her but she had to admit, this was comfortable.

"Seven?"

She looked over meeting the Captain's startled gaze and sat up on her forearm. She waited for a response but could tell the Captain was gathering her bearing as those blue eyes travelled along her body. "Is something wrong Captain?"

This would be an opportune moment to remove her biosuit, but no, not yet.

"It's…just…"

This was taking too long. Seven reached out and grabbed the Captain at the waist, pulling her onto the bed.

"Seven!"

The Captain landed on top of her, in her arms, and Seven smirked at the wide gaze watching her. "I believe it is commonplace to do this lying down."

The Captain's eyes widened a touch, one of her hands gripping the outer edge of the bed, the other at Seven's shoulder, gently pushing distance between them.

Seven scanned the body over hers, pleasantly amused by the Captain's heightened readings. "Do I fluster you, Captain?"

Janeway turned away.

"I take that as a yes." Like she'd done many times up to now, Seven took Kathryn's uniform into her hands and pulled her close, taking in Kathryn's smell, her lips brushing Kathryn's ear. "Pinning you to a wall would be inefficient." She said soft but sly, smiling over the Captain's shoulder at the racing heartbeats against her chest. Humans were easy to arouse.

She touched Kathryn's cheek and pulled Kathryn's gaze to hers, pressing her lips to Kathryn's. Kathryn didn't respond immediately, but Seven wasn't letting go this time. The Captain's heat warmed her biosuit; their clothes insufferable layers that kept them apart.

'Do you love me, Captain?'

The Captain's hands tenderly touched her face.

Seven turned on her side to get better leverage and pinned the Captain beneath her. Finally she was the captor, and an amusing game it was to play.

Seven winced at the strike of pain through her head. 'No.'

"…refrain from emotional simulation…"

She heard the Doctor's warning in her head but hugged the Captain to her. She expected to fight the Captain's concerns, but this time the woman said nothing and followed her lead, adding "fuel to the fire", as Kathryn once remarked.

Aches emerged in different areas, most in her head, some elsewhere, starting as subtle throbs that intensified with each moment she pushed. Her breaths deepened to fight the pain as the Captain's hold on her firmed, reassuring her doubts. Did Kathryn feel as she felt? Did heat swell between her legs too?

This exhilarating moment, Seven wanted to live and feel every bit of it. She followed her instincts, allowed them to show her what to do.

Seven tugged the Captain's shirt from her pants earning a throaty chuckle from the woman who smiled into the kiss. Her palm met the captain's bare abdomen and a jolt rushed up her arm. The kiss was subsequent to the warm life under her hand. She felt down the Captain's ribcage. Her fingers traipsing over the curvature, making note of the Captain's anatomy as she went. The Captain arched slightly to her touch and Seven found herself wondering, what other ways would the Captain respond to her…explorations? Taking control was tempting…and so satisfying.

Sharp, stabbing. Agony crashed against the front of her skull, the pressure inside growing unbearable. Seven froze in the kiss, her eyes squeezed shut. 'I won't give in…' Her muscles tensed at the overwhelming pain. She held a grunt in her throat and broke away slow, resting her forehead against the Captain's shoulder.

It too would pass, she just had to wait. But this time it felt different, the pain intensifying instead of subsiding. Around the Captain's waist her fingers clenched as a seizing wave hit her. She grunted through gritted teeth, unable to hold it back any longer.

"No more." The Captain breathed and took Seven's face, her eyes widening with concern as their gazes met. A ginger hand touched Seven's cheek, wiping away something from beneath her right eye.

Kathryn pressed a tender, lingering kiss to the stressed vein running down the center of Seven's forehead. "Come on." She sat up, the ledge of the viewport at her back.

The pain slowly quieted as Seven helplessly endured her fate, immobile with no energy left in her body. None to lift herself from Kathryn's lap, none to fuel her will either.

"Do you want me to get the Doctor?"

A machine always needs fixing. Seven narrowed her gaze at the Captain's pitiful tone but doing so intensified her discomfort. No, Kathryn didn't look down on her, she already proved that she saw her as so much more. Kathryn told her she was beautiful when others feared her, came back for her when escape was Voyager's best tactical option, and continued to fight for her.

Seven relaxed with a soundless sigh and closed her eyes. "No."

Snatched away again. Their moment doomed from the start.

Seven's hand stayed under Kathryn's shirt, wrapped around desperate but clutching weak at the Captain's waist.

She was so close to love, close to proving her truth to Kathryn. She nearly had it. Everything she felt was real, was hers. Kathryn had to know she felt her fear, her excitement, her need for reassurance. Their goals were inline, were one. She was more than a drone, and more human than the crew understood, but also perhaps not. A machine is bound to fail eventually.

Kathryn's hand rubbed soothing circles into Seven's back. The pain withered slowly and Seven relaxed at Kathryn's touch. How many different sensations could spur from the same person? It intrigued her. Was it a difference in the manner of touch, or in the emotions that followed it?

Seven bit back the sour taste in her mouth and laid her hand atop the Captain's thigh, her eyes narrowing. That procedure couldn't come soon enough. She could've called the doctor and forced him to start now. The sooner the better. She couldn't take it anymore. Her sentience meant little if someone else was in control.

Weakened, she lay still. Moving took too much effort from her drained body. Her immobility reminded her of the Borg Queen's all-too-real simulation. She could still feel the Captain's dead weight heavy in her arms and the Borg Queen's control coursing through her, rendering her body useless.

The Captain's eyes were black in death. Empty, with not a semblance of the person she was left in them. The image haunted her.

"Seven?"

The Borg had no concept of death. In death, a drone's memories lived on in the collective. But what about the Captain? What happened to organic life that ceased to be? What did they leave behind?

"Seven."

The voice above her sounded again, pushing this time. At a squeeze to her shoulder Seven blinked back her unsettling thoughts, her eyes noting how her hand clutched the Captain's thigh. With an exhale she loosened her grip.

"What's wrong?"

Kathryn's hand stroked her cheek.

'Seven of Nine.' The Borg Queen's voice came next. When was the voice real? When was it a figment of her thoughts? She didn't know winced at the sudden painful ache in her head, hiding her face so Kathryn wouldn't catch it. After a moment it dulled, quicker than the episode before. She gently sighed, her brow remaining tense.

"Seven…"

She waited to answer, mulling over the Borg Queen's voice and the thought it conjured of something the crew mentioned about the Captain's fate, something she once brushed off. Her mouth growing dry, Seven started. "The crew have…mentioned that the Captain goes down with the ship. Is it true?"

Kathryn didn't answer right away, starting after a breath. "…should any untimely peril strike Voyager and render it a dead ship—"

"Dead ship?"

"Destroyed beyond repair."

"…continue."

Kathryn took another breath. "Should Voyager be deemed inhabitable, it is the captain's duty to evacuate the crew…and resign to fate with a smile." Kathryn did so with a lifted chin. "Not much else you can do in a situation like that. As Captains we learn to accept that term of our oath wholeheartedly early on, so it's easier to take that last breath." Kathryn remained silent, her gaze turned to the viewport.

"Seems unwise." Seven softly said.

"It's a respected tradition that originated with maritime officers centuries ago."

"I would not allow that to happen."

Kathryn smiled at Seven's stubbornness.

"It is an archaic practice, that promotes unnecessary loss."

"It's a tradition of honor."

"To attach oneself to a material object and perish?" Seven said, a moment later squeezing her eyes shut against a wave of pain tearing down the front of her skull; The Captain's hand warming the back of her neck.

"Have you ever heard of the RMS Titanic?"

"No." Seven replied with a strain in her voice, her clenched expression softening with her breaths as the wave passed. "Explain."

"It was a 20th century ocean liner…"

"Ocean liner?"

"A seafaring ship."

"Like in the Doctor's story?"

Kathryn chuckled. "Yes, but less romanticized."

"What happened?"

"Its hull struck an iceberg in the middle of the night…"

"Was it repaired?"

"No. The ship took on water, eventually split in two, and sunk to the ocean floor. Where it stayed for centuries."

Seven's brow tensed.

"The captain perished along with almost two-thousand people."

"Your attempts to console me are failing."

"Look at it this way. Imagine you were one of those people about to die. How would it look if the captain abandoned ship?"

"…selfish."

"Exactly." Kathryn's chest rose and fell with a deep breath. "I like to think that in their final moments the passengers saw that not as an act of sacrifice but of solidarity."

Seven focused on the warmth where she lay. A gentle, measured thump caught her augmented hearing, as did the subtle intakes and exhales from the Captain's nose.

Attaching oneself to a person obligated to die seemed futile. That death could come any day, who was to know. Kathryn's proclivity for risk and adventure made her death a likely outcome. A lot could happen in their forty year journey to Earth.

The Collective never allowed Borg to ponder the finality of life. There was nothing to ponder. No thoughts could spur from an absent concept. Maybe that was one of the conveniences of a limited state of mind. Her heart never sank at uneasy thoughts.

"I am responsible for the lives of everyone aboard this ship. I am the first on and the last off." Kathryn tilted her head back and closed her eyes. "It would be a breach of honor, integrity, and every reason I signed up, if I abandoned ship out of fear for my own life. It's not a choice I have."

"Then I will stay. Your chances of survival are greater with me present." Seven said softly and closed her eyes, a void consuming her bit by bit.

"…I'm sure they would be." Came Kathryn's flat response along with a sigh. Seven tried to sit up but Kathryn held her movements at bay, those gentle circles at her back starting again.

'Captain.' Seven's world darkened as she followed the subtle rhythm of that thump and Voyager's hum, until they drifted away too. Her grasp around the Captain slackened, her fingers unable to maintain their hold. The Darkness, it grew, taking her more with each passing moment—

Seven jolted, eyes wide, her heart pounding.


At the jolt in her lap, Kathryn opened her eyes and sat up from the viewport. "What is it?"

"I don't know." Seven swallowed her apprehension and tried to sit up, but again that hand at her back stilled her effort.

"My eyes…they felt…I can't keep them open."

Kathryn slowly smiled and slid to Seven's level, propped on her side. Face to face they met; Seven's gaze drained but watching her with a questioning look. Kathryn caressed Seven's cheek. "You look tired." She started soft.

"That is not possible."

"The Doctor did say much of your human physiology continues to reassert itself, and you've had a long night." Kathryn pulled out the apparatus holding Seven's hair in that immaculate updo and set it on the nightstand beside her. 'Wow...'

Golden hair cascaded to Seven's shoulders as a sleepy softness fought to take hold of Seven's features. Kathryn's eyes locked onto the beautiful sight she'd never seen.

"What are you suggesting?"

Seven's voice brought her from her musings. "That you close your eyes…" Kathryn's hand covered Seven's eyes, hinting that her guidance was to be followed.

A second later Seven's hand latched to her wrist. "No." Seven pulled Kathryn's hand away, her chest heaving and eyes darting. "I don't like that feeling."

"Why?" The Captain's arm slid over Seven's waist.

"It's dark…permanent." Seven struggled to put her feelings into words, but Kathryn held her soft smile.

"Trust your instincts."

"They're saying I won't wake up." Seven tried to sit up but Kathryn pressed a gentle hand to her waist.

"Then trust me…"

Seven looked into her eyes and tentatively relaxed.

"…I'll make sure you do."

Seven's focus drifted. She sat for a while in contemplation, her eyes finally closing but opening again.

"I Promise."

Seven closed her eyes one last time.

Kathryn kissed Seven's temple. She stroked Seven's golden tresses, amazed by how her fingers combed through them with ease. They were smooth like gentle flowing water. Another example of Seven's pristine health, enhanced to near perfection by technology. Hell, the only time Seven ever looked out of sorts was after a battle knocked them around. But even then, Seven's bad hair days managed to look good.

"I think I'm in love with you." Kathryn whispered then quickly caught her breath at the thought of Seven's immaculate hearing. She paled then relaxed a moment later when Seven didn't respond.

"Doctor to Seven of Nine."

The Captain stayed quiet battling with the decision of whether to answer for Seven or not. But she figured the Doctor would try to locate her if Seven didn't respond.

"Doctor to Seven of Nine."

Kathryn gently slipped the combadge from Seven's uniform and tapped it.

"Seven can't answer right now."

"C-Captain?" A huff came from the other end. "I specifically told Seven to refrain from any type of emotional stimulation." He grumbled. "I knew something was going to happen after I left you two—"

"She's sleeping doctor."

"Oh?" His tone brightened. "Really?"

"Yes. Is this news something you can share with me?"

"Just a few odd neural readings." He paused. "For which I now know you were the cause, but…she seems to have stabilized."

The Captain's guilty silence reinforced his suspicions and he sighed.

"I guess I need to give you the lecture too about why it's important that she maintain her self-control."

"You don't, I get it Doctor."

"The procedure is tomorrow"

"Why so soon?"

"Her request."

The Captain looked to Seven.

"No need to worry though as I am sufficiently prepared."

"I'm sure I don't need to talk to you about the confidentiality of my relationship with Seven."

"Of course Captain. I respect your privacy…and may be fearing for a few of my subroutines."

The Captain smirked. "Thank you Doctor."


0400

A looming threat woke her. After nearly twenty years in Starfleet and a decade as a senior officer, she knew the eerie feeling of "something isn't right" very well, and quickly learned to trust it. The intuition stirred as dread in the air and filled her chest.

Her eyes opened and she sat up at the green hue glowing against the partition, emanating from the living room. Her instincts perked, her sleepiness quickly forgotten. She moved but stopped at her arm pinned beneath the sleeping woman's head. She tried again, moving slower, carefully wedging out from beneath Seven and slipping off the bed.

She stepped from behind the partition and froze, paling at whose ghastly presence watched her from the middle of her quarters.

"We meet again, Captain."

"What are you doing in my quarters?" She said and grit her teeth. Her eyes narrow beneath a sharp furrowed brow at the Borg Queen's tame smile.

"Her loyalty to you is puzzling me. I don't know what she sees in such…disarray." The Borg Queen sized her. "I told her I'd deactivate her if she told you."

"But you can't, can you?"

"Don't tempt my hand Captain. We're closing in on your whereabouts. You've used her for your purposes long enough."

Janeway sized the Borg Queen's figure, studying the translucent green hue. It was just a hologram. But even that begged the question of 'How?'. Janeway didn't dare question it out loud. The Borg Queen didn't need to know her weaknesses. But the sight of the projection, hologram, or whatever it was standing in her quarters, soured her stomach. This wasn't good.

"I came to suggest a truce. Aren't you tired of fighting us Captain? We will always adapt."

Janeway stared into her eyes. She'd never back down, especially when it concerned Seven.

"You stole something from us and we want it back."

"Seven is not an object."

"She is unique. But she is still mine." The Borg Queen started closer. "I have foregone many opportunities to destroy this ship—"

"I'd like to see you try."

"I've shown you and your crew mercy, Captain." The Borg Queen stopped less than an arm length away. "Return Seven of Nine to me, convince her to come willingly, and I will not trouble you further."

"Like hell I will."

"I can offer you something greater."

Janeway lifted her chin.

"What if I told you we knew a faster way to get you home—"

"I wouldn't trust you."

"Foolish Captain. I'm offering allyship, unfettered passage through our space with no threat of assimilation."

"You must be desperate."

"My transwarp technology alone can reinvigorate this meandering ship. You know that, you did try to steal it from me before."

"And I succeeded."

"One coil is not enough. I'm offering something more, something you haven't discovered yet, and predict it will eliminate an additional 30 years from your journey."

The Captain grit her teeth behind thin lips.

"One person for the deliverance of your crew. Seven of Nine would understand the logic. Besides, you yourself said you were "losing focus". " The Borg queen paused with a slick smile on her face. "I'm offering you reprieve."

Janeway's gaze widened in anger her lip twitched. "Get off my ship." The Captain seethed with disgust.

"You don't know her as I." The Borg Queen came closer. "I watched her grow and mature to what she is."

"You tore a human apart to fit your sick image and shackled her to your will. I'd hardly call that growth."

"I perfected a species. I made her better. You can't deny that the enhancements I've given her have been beneficial to your journey, and I am willing to see value in the changes you've made."

"Changes." Kathryn scoffed, tired of listening to the Borg Queen liken Seven to a piece of hardware.

"As she is now, her potential is incalculable. She is the first of a new generation of Borg...but your recent...teachings regress and destroy a perfect mind."

Kathryn furrowed her brow to a dangerous point.

"Without us she will never see her full truth to fruition."

"What truth is that? A life of violent assimilations and tearing apart worlds? I see only deception."

"Are your dreams and fallacies any different—"

"She has a Life here—"

"Empty existence."

Kathryn approached, standing nearly nose to nose with the Borg Queen. "I will rip those tubes out of your head and destroy every piece of you if it is the last thing I do. You will never touch her again."

The Borg Queen lifted her chin to the threat.

"I know your tactics, and you should know better than to intimidate me. Leave. her. alone."

"Your stubbornness will lead to your demise Captain. Hers as well." The Borg Queen fizzled away and Kathryn quietly released the shaky breath from her chest.

That demise concerned her more than she wanted to admit. She'd fight like hell for Seven, but the Borg were a formidable adversary.

Why couldn't the Borg Queen let Seven go? She had thousands of drones yet couldn't let one go.

The Captain turned and slowly walked to the partition, stopping for a moment to watch Seven's sleeping form with a sullen gaze. 'How do I protect you?'

Seven turned, opening her eyes to the empty space beside her. "Captain?" She found her leaning against the partition and their gazes met. "Is something wrong?"

Kathryn shook her head and climbed onto the bed, her hand trailing up Seven's arm. She laid down and pulled Seven close to her, kissing Seven's temple.

"Are you sure?"

Kathryn kissed her again, and her arms wrapped around Seven's frame.

"Captain?"

"Go back to sleep."


A.N. I teared up a little when I finished editing this because I love this story, and it has been so long since I released a new chapter.