A/N: Don't know when this became so dark, tell me if it's something you all would like? Or should I lower the tension a bit? Poor Kai...

Ps. Appliepie, did you recieve my PM?

Ch 12

(Pressure)


He suppressed a yawn as he made his way downstairs, albeit sluggishly, his fiery untamed hair falling into his eyes, giving him a deceiving innocent look.

"You fucking did it"

"I did not"

"Yes, you did"

"I didn't"

"Yes, you did you fucking twerp,"

"I didn-"

"WILL YOU TWO SHUT THE FUCK UP?!"

The two voices quietened down as the blonde gave them a scolding, muttering under their breaths, most probably calling each other every name they had collected in their impressive vocabulary.

Tala rolled his eyes and sat down on the chair opposite to Bryan, raking a hand through his hair, eyeing his two teammates who were bickering like kids a minute ago.

Every morning, the norm was that he would wake up to find the two, the falcon and the shrimp, in a truffle, and the Spencer would be trying unsuccessfully to get them to stop from tearing each other's throats, until they'd rile up his nerves too much and he'd have to deal with them.

You think they'd really obey?

Of Course not, the fighting would continue once again until they had well gone deep into their sleeps, and even then, in their dreams, they'd be cursing each other.

Guess it wasn't so easy, but he found that he didn't really mind it, he never had, actually, their constant quarreling filled the days with a weird kind of feeling that he felt almost nostalgic at the thought of it being gone, because if it were gone, that would mean that they weren't there with him, and he was all alone…

"Enough now, Cap'n, snap out of your mind"

A hand waved in front of him and he heard Bryan's voice, before sighing and pushing the hand away.

Bryan gave him a look before biting on his bread, humming an idiotically mismatched tune along with.

Tala looked up as Spencer placed a cup of coffee and a plate with some scrambled eggs in front of him, nodding thankfully at him.

He picked up the mug, the same black one, and wondered if the blonde ever got tired of taking care of them. After all, he was the captain, so he was naturally supposed to take care of them, but being taken care of was also nice.

His thought strayed to Kai and a frown formed on his forehead. At the moment, he was the one who had no one to take care of him. Who knew if he had even eaten or not? He was already unhealthily thin, and being busy with work was bound to make him skip meals. He swore if Kai returned back looking worse than before, he'd kill him by force-feeding.

"Easy there, Tala. The poor fork is gonna break," Ian's voice boomed in his head before he looked down at his hand, noticing the bent fork, releasing the death like grip on it.

"Something on your mind, Tal?"

He glanced at Bryan, before shaking his head.

"It's just… Kai"

"Who else would it b- Oww, Spencer, that fuck was that for?!"

Spencer eyed Bryan dangerously, daring him to continue speaking, before turning to Tala.

"What about him? Did you talk to him last night?"

Tala nodded.

"What did he say?"

"Nothing much really"

"You seem worried," Spencer's eyes were digging into him, he looked down to escape from having to face them.

"Tala… is there something wrong with Kai?"

Tala shrugged his shoulders, his face neutral though they could notice the troubled expression in the way his eyes flickered around worriedly.

"Tala?"

Tala shrugged again before looking back down, "Something weird is happening, but I don't know what"

Bryan raised an eyebrow, before rolling his eyes, "Well, he is a fucking weirdo, so it's natur- fucking hell Spencer, why the fuck do you keep kicking me!?"

He rubbed his shin before muttering some more and eventually falling silent as Spencer gave him a no nonsense look, while Ian smirked at him, which nearly made him want to punch his face.

He looked back at Tala who was still staring down, slapping him on the shoulder, urging him to continue by saying, "The heck is wrong with him now?"

Tala gave him an annoyed glare, "You were right there, Bryan. How the fuck do you not know?"

"What the fuck don't I know?"

Tala muttered something incomprehensive while pinching the bridge of his nose. Talking to Bryan was like talking to a five year old – literally – he could already feel a dull ache appearing in his head, no thanks to you, Bryan.

He sighed irritatedly before snapping at him, "Last night, when you barged into my room, and interrupted me, don't you fucking remember?"

Bryan looked like he was still trying to comprehend which language he was speaking before letting out an "Oh"

"Will you stop fucking talking in riddles, just tell us what happened, god damnit!" an impatient voice sounded, coming from the shortest one of them who now sat giving them frustrated looks.

"Yeah, just tell us, Tala. Is he alright?"

Tala shook his head in denial, a frown appearing on his pale forehead.

"What happened now?"

"Another panic attack, induced by a nightmare."

Silence spread over them, none knowing what to say.

What could they do, anyways? As if they themselves weren't so twisted up already, that they would be able to help another with such issues as Kai was sporting.

Kai had said leaving would help, and they hadn't held a grudge against him anymore after knowing the situation. What more could they do? They weren't exactly fit for verbal or physical affection, so how were they supposed to do anything about it?

No one knew the answer.

Spencer broke the silence, "Did he say he was taking any medicine or whatsoever?"

Tala shook his head.

"He didn't say, and most probably, he isn't taking any. He wouldn't want to tell someone about it, even if it's a doctor."

"Did he say if something else was bothering him?"

"Nyet, though, I'm pretty sure he's lurking in his self-loathing. He is just blaming himself for everything."

"But what does he have to worry about anymore? The abbey is destroyed, Boris is dead, Voltaire is behind the bars, and he gets all the property. What does he even want anymore? He's just being too spoiled for his own sake," the dumb words came out of Ian's mouth before anyone could stop him.

Spencer and Bryan looked abruptly as the china plate made compact with the chair on which Ian sat, cowering under the seething glare of the redhead.

Said redhead made ready to jump over the shrimp, but Bryan caught him by the waist, pulling him back.

Tala kept screaming all kinds of colorful profanities at the small boy who now hid trembling behind Spencer.

"Calm the fuck down, Tala!"

"No fucking way, the fucking midget is gonna have it so bad," he lunged forwards again, which resulted in Bryan punching his abdomen and knocking the breathe out of him.

The redhead seemed finally to calm down, though kept his glaring eyes pointed towards Ian.

"Let me go!!" he tried in vain to pry Bryan's hands away.

"Not until you promise you'll sit your ass down calmly," Spencer said, crossing his arms. Their rage outbursts were seriously a straight way for getting headaches. Not that he had signed up for this.

"Fine!! But keep the twerp away or he'll be dead," he spat out. Ian still took Spencer's aid in shielding himself from the icy looks he was receiving from the wolf.

Bryan finally let the fuming redhead go and sat down with a 'hmphh'.

"You know already Tala, Ian just doesn't think before speaking. Why would you get so offended?" he looked up at the questioning blond before following Bryan and sitting down too, his energy drained out from him, no longer glaring Ian to death.

"I am just worried, okay?!" Tala let out hoarsely, his voice sore from having screamed at Ian earlier.

"I am just worried, he has no one there to look after him, what if he just lies to us that he is eating properly and getting decent sleep while in actual he isn't? Who would tell us? We can't observe him that well over the phone, and he might as well just hang up if we nag him about that and not pick our calls at all. How would we know if he's dead or alive?"

Bryan sighed exasperatedly and slammed both his palms on the table before looking at the redhead.

"You're being too fucking overdramatic, Tala. And really, we wouldn't know if he's alive or not? That would become one heck of a piece of news. I can just imagine the headlines. Wonder what they'll read though."

A pale fist banged hard on the table which made them jerk before staring at Tala with wide eyes as the seething eyes of the redhead bore into Bryan, who seemed oblivious to it as he kept staring at the opposite wall with a non bothered look.

"You just want him dead, don't you?"

Ian flinched and turned his head even lower, regretting every word that he had let come out of his throat earlier, while Bryan yet had to acknowledge the hateful looks he was getting, before finally meeting the eyes of his captain, which screamed murder.

"I didn't know you hated him that much to even imagine what the headlines would read, tell me, is this what you've been thinking of all the time since we met him? Right, Ian?"

Ian snapped his head up before shaking it vigorously, pleading eyes looking at his own hardened ones, "No, Tala, I swear, I didn't mean anything I said earlier."

"Even then, what is the probability that you don't hate him?"

Ian's eyes, if possible, turned even more desperate, before he got up and rounded the table to stand next to Tala, clutching the cloth of his shirt and pleading once again like a child.

Tala pushed him away and stood up, "See, this is why I don't fucking like telling you anything about him. You are just going to make fun of him, it's not like he matters, anyways. I bet you also hate that I care."

He eyed Bryan once more with a venomous look before storming outside, slamming the door close behind him, leaving the other staring after him.


His footsteps echoed lightly on the cold stones of the pavement as his roaming eyes searched around.

He swore he had heard a sound.

Another pair of steps resounded behind him and he jerked back, eyeing the shadows that hid his follower.

His eyes narrowed as his ears registered a huffing breath, before a figure emerged.

"Kai! Dude, you walk too fast! Wait for me!" the brunette panted before covering the little distance and coming to stand beside him.

"What do you want?" his voice sounding colder than he had intended to.

Wyatt frowned.

"Nothing, I just thought you could do with some company"

Kai rolled his eyes before starting to walk forwards, Wyatt following close behind like a loyal puppy.

They kept walking for some time before the path ended to a large tree, the area secluded and silent.

Wyatt himself would never have come to such a creepy place at night, but Kai's presence erased his fears somewhat.

A shuffle of feet brought his attention to Kai who now leaned on the huge stem of the tree, his arms crossed and eyes staring at something invisible in the dark.

"Kai?"

The bluenette did not seem to listen to him, worrying him more. He recalled the day before when Kai had entered the classroom looking so ... unlike him. And afterwards, he hadn't spotted him for lunch or dinner either.

"Kai?" he called again, shaking the other's shoulder lightly.

Kai seemed to be shaken out of his thoughts and stared at him, "What?"

"Can I ask you a question?"

Kai raised an eyebrow, but nodded nonetheless.

"Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," once more, the lie, though Wyatt hadn't the experience to know if it was a lie or truth.

"Okay. I just, you seemed a bit off yesterday," Wyatt said a bit hesitantly, he didn't want Kai to turn him away just because he was being too nosy.

"As I just said, I'm fine, not that it's any of your business," the bluenette's voice seemed irritated. He straightened himself and made his way back to the dorms.

Wyatt walked behind again, his steps slow, unlike the bluenette who just wanted to hide in the privacy of his own room.

Staring at Kai's retreating him, he frowned once again.

He knew what everyone said behind the bluenette's back, rumors always kept flying fast in this school, and most of them were far from pleasant. He just hoped Kai himself wouldn't know what everyone talked about him, and what words were used to refer to him.

He didn't know why, but he didn't see the truth in any of them. For him, Kai seemed like a lone wolf who pretended not to care, but deep down he did.

Kai definitely didn't seem alright, and he didn't know why he was so bothered by that fact...


The door was snapped closed with quick movements before a figure leaned on it, his breathing a little erratic, light perspiration shining on the pale skin.

Why the fuck was that kid following him around everywhere?!

Up to now, he hadn't gone one day without the stupid kid almost stalking him. What the fuck did he even want from him?!

He shook his head before straightening himself up and walking to his desk, sitting down on the chair heavily, a hand coming to rake through sweaty silver locks.

His gaze settled on the opened notebook in front of him, reminding him that that was the only thing he had done towards finishing his homework, just opening it.

He picked it and brought it closer to his eyes, more trigonometric problems...

How the hell was he supposed to focus when he had a pounding headache and his eyes hurt every time he moved them? And the sweat clinging to his body made him shiver unintentionally, reminding him to take a shower, which he put away for the moment to focus on the work in front of him.

The night grew long as the bluenette sat hunched over his desk, the strokes of the pen and occasional cursing the only thing to be heard. The process was slower than it should have been as the splitting headache and lack of sleep made him lose his focus every now and then, just wanting to rip the pages in front of him, but suppressing the urge to.

By the time he was done, it was already five. He shakily stood up and made his way to the bed, all but slumping down on it and let sleep overtake him, even if for a minimum of two hours.


Several days following, it became a routine, during the time after school, he would fight every nerve of his not to evoke another attack, trying to split his attention by studying or taking random walks around the ground, but purposely avoiding blading, as he knew it would lull him to a certain bitbeast whose presence would create a haphazard – as he knew that at the moment he didn't have the self-control he had used while battling Spencer, and that if he were to blade, he would immediately go for the black phoenix – all the while avoiding the nosy kid, before coming back exhausted to his room and starting his work, when it would already be dark outside.

The whole night he would focus – or rather try to – to finish his work before falling on the bed, sometimes four, but sometimes, a mere one hour before he had to get up again to get ready for school.

He ignored any and every call or message he got from the blitzkriegs, not really knowing why, but he told himself that he didn't want to appear too weak in front of them, not anymore. He had taken enough of their pity, didn't need it anymore.

His sleep deprived mind barely got much attention onto whatever the teacher would be talking about in class, but his grades barely got affected, so the teachers had nothing to complain about.

As the days wore on, his health decayed to a point he was losing most of his muscles, his arms resembling a dainty girl's, and his stomach sank in, his body at a very dangerous level of weight.

The lesser hours of sleep made him take a rest from nightmares as his mind became too tired to conjure up events from the past to scare him.

None seemed to notice this though, except Wyatt, who tried every way to get him to open up, but would always meet a door slammed into his face, or a punch if he tried to get too close.

He was relentless, but Kai was better...


Another night, similar to the ones gone before, found the bluenette again indulged in the lifeless boring book as he tried to make sense of the text in front of him. The words, though, seemed to jumble up and down, and he rubbed his eyes to attain his focus on the task at hand.

His eyebrow ticked as the phone rang yet another time, making him want to smash it against the wall and shatter it to millions of pieces.

Instead, he stood up in a manner so unlike him, cursing every living being along with the non-living ones to eternal death before taking slow shaky steps and going over to the bed, searching amongst his sheets for the annoying device, before his eyes narrowed.

24 missed calls in a row, it had never been that much.

It rang again, and he finally decided to break his record and put it to his ear before returning back to the chair.

/"Kai?"/

"What?!"

The other got agitated by the tone he was using, /"The fuck do you mean what?!! Huh?? Where the fuck have you been?! And why the fuck were you ignoring our calls??! Do you know how fucking worried we were?!"/

Kai closed his eyes in frustration as a headache seemed to appear along with the redhead's voice.

"I don't have any time to explain anything to you."

/"No fucking way, you bastard, you're gonna tell me right now what the fuck is going on?!"/

"No I'm not," he tried his best to hide the irritation in his voice, because deep down he knew he was just exaggerating it by ignoring them, but he just couldn't be bothered anymore.

A few moments of silence, which came as a surprise as he expected Tala to almost tear his throat screaming at him, after which came once again the stupid questions that made him feel so pathetic and weak with the mere sound of them.

/"Kai, what is happening with you? Did you have it again? Are you even getting enough sleep? You sound like a zombie"/

"Look Tala, I don't have the time to laze around like a fucking sloth, I'm too fucking busy."

/"No you're not, Kai. You're just doing this all on purpose. But why?"/

"Why the fuck do you even care? The bigger question is, who the fuck gave you the right to interrogate me like that? What are you, my mother?"

/"I don't have a fucking clue of what you're onto, Kai. But all you can do is appreciate my care."/

"Appreciate your care? Does annoying me with your meaningless and useless shit seem like care to you?"

/"That's it. This is why I hate talking to you!"/

"I didn't ask you to fucking bother anyways."

He hung up the phone before throwing it roughly onto the bed, grabbing his hair and letting out a frustrated growl before striding towards the bathroom for a much needed shower.

A reckless fight with Tala was all he wanted. Great…


Tala stared down at the phone, his eyes filling with rage the longer he did. In order to vent it out, he smashed it against the opposite wall, the poor device falling apart into shards.

What was the bluenette's problem, anyways? If this was what he was gonna get for caring, then the other could go fuck himself because he wasn't doing the same mistake again.

He was ruining his bonds with his teammates, the people who had always stayed by his side, for someone who had left.

He was doing that for Kai...

How foolish...

Vaguely he remembered it was a gift given from Kai, which he had taken him along with to get after Voltaire had been put behind bars.

Thinking of it, everything was a gift from Kai.

His seething eyes took in the room, the carpet, the bed, the cupboard, the ceiling, the door, the pillows, the wardrobe, every fucking thing, gift from Kai.

The house, the food, the money, the clothes, gifts from Kai.

What was theirs? Nothing.

The longer he looked at everything, the word 'gift' transformed to 'pity'.

Pity...

He didn't like the sound of that. He needed to get out of here, away from everything that belonged to Kai.


Spencer looked up as hurried footsteps descended the stairs and a fuming redhead came downstairs.

He was just about to ask what the shouting was about, but Tala jerked open the door and hurried out, the bang of the door closing resounding loudly throughout the entire house.

What had happened?


Thanks for reading!

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