Winter's Refuge

Chapter Forty

JED 'KID' CURRY

Whatever the doctor gave me, I had no dreams. Just feelings of darkness, anger, and the alert tension of holding a gun in my hand. I have the feelin' of havin' slept for a long time. The room's dark when I open my eyes, but when I look toward the window, I can see light from the bottom of the curtains. Sun or moon, I don't know. Dizziness clouded my vision, but I force myself to look around the room. There is another hospital bed back under the window, where mine used to be, and a third on the far wall. Both are occupied but I can't see who is usin' them.

The dizziness forces my eyes to close. This time I dream of the terrified look on Chrissy's face as she hid in the corner of the room behind Juan. And the frightened Aiden as he was forced into the hall at gunpoint. It just keeps repeatin' without movin' forward until I finally feel the pain in my legs as I ran forward to get in back of the men. Then the pain in my back becomes more prominent as I straighten it and take my gunfighter stance. I did it without thinkin', it's my natural reaction when facin' off. I held Heyes' gun in my hand firmly. My muscles in my shoulder, objectin' to my stance and the grip I had on the gun, responded by tremblin'. Most of that is hidden by the hospital gown. I don't know if I have the physical strength to pull the trigger, but if my family was in danger, I would find the strength somewhere. The fear on Chrissy's face dominates my dream and pushes out anything else.

HEYES

Speed of Flight is still here. The foreman was a bad man. He wanted to hurt Chrissy. And he held a gun on Lom. Now he's going to be on trial. Lom sent a telegram to the Circle E to have someone pick her up. I don't know how much he explained.

We have one mare from the Box Hickory Ranch coming day after tomorrow. Her name appears to be Becky's Baby. The writing on the letter is messy, but that's what Chrissy wrote in the log. Me and Lom worked late last night and all morning to get the other guest stall ready for her. The breeding paddock is ready, too. Chrissy had put a ? in the log for which stud we were to use for breeding. The second letter appears to say they would pick when they arrived and evaluated our males. The only thing Chrissy's notes were very clear about was the fee we were charging. She signed the letter Mrs. Jed Curry again. I don't remember going to the wedding, but she does wear the Kid's ring. I watch them together; they are in love. I'll have to try and remember the wedding.

Lom isn't taking any chances. He asked the construction supervisor, Russell, to come armed and stand with him when Becky's Baby arrives. I'm glad he didn't ask me. I don't like new people. I see each one as a threat. I do carry the knife in my boot again.

After we finished cleaning the paddock, Lom went into Three Birds. He is riding with Sheriff Birde into Bridgeport today. They are escorting the man from the Circle E who tried to kidnap, or kill, Chrissy there. That was only yesterday, but Lom said Sheriff Birde had two US Marshals in Three Birds within a couple of hours. Lom said that the Birds have strong connections in this state all the way to the governor. They made sure there won't be any newspaper stories about what happened and the arrest. The trial will be this afternoon and closed to outsiders. Any publicity would give away Chrissy's location and put her in danger. Lom will testify to what happened.

"Heyes, you gonna be okay here without me? Like we talked about yesterday, Russell will stay until I get back. It might be late tonight."

I found my chalkboard and wrote, "Alone good." I was afraid to stay alone, but if it would help that man be put away and keep Chrissy safe, I'd do it. I just hope no one comes to pick up Speed of Flight. I know that we were already paid for the stud fees, but I don't want to meet a stranger. Strangers are threats.

"Go." I wrote. "Back Becky's Baby?" I asked, suddenly worried about that too. I can write a little faster now but it takes a lot of effort.

"Yes, I'll be back before she's dropped off and everything's ready for her. Just take care of all the horses in the afternoon. Follow this list. That's all you need to do," Lom told me.

"Careful," I wrote, then I said, "L…Lom."

He smiled. "Nice, Heyes."

JED 'KID' CURRY

"Chrissy, hide. Chrissy!" I tried to touch her in my nightmare, but pain in my shoulder stops me.

"Miss Chrissy's fine. She's sleeping." Juan's voice was comfortin' as I struggled to wake up.

The window was open. That light was the only brightness in the room. Juan was playin' solitaire on a small table by the foot of my bed. "I'll get you some water."

"Thanks…and food. Real food." I smiled at him.

"You mean no more of that thin broth? I wondered when you would start objecting to that." There was a laugh in his voice. "I'll bring you a meal from the diner."

"NO!" Chrissy's voice joined in. I saw her sit up on the bed on the far wall. "Ask good doctor first." Her tone was firm, and I didn't dare cross her.

"Permission granted." Aiden's muttered words came from the bed under the window. "Get some lamps lit in here," he grumbled. "Need pain medicine."

In the light, I could see he had two black eyes and a very swollen jaw and realized that the pain medicine was for him. His arm was bound tightly to his side. He sat up on the side of his bed. He started to rest his head in his free hand but jerked it back when his jaw touched.

"Guard! Guard!" he called, and suddenly I felt like I was back in prison. Aiden looked at me and then Chrissy. "The guards are here to protect you, not restrain you," he explained. Still, I felt the need to sit up, then stand up, and walk toward the door.

A large man with a uniform and a gun blocked my exit. "Sir, we'd prefer if you'd stay in your room so we can better protect you."

I bristled at the 'sir' and stopped for a moment as Aiden called to them, "Please tell the nurse I need another dose of the pain medicine. Now!"..

I didn't pay attention to the answer. I pushed by the guard and started walkin' down the hall.

"Sir, sir, please come back here!" The man was polite but insistent. I was just as determined not to turn around.

I was saved by a familiar female voice askin' the guard, "Sir, I was told you could direct me to Mr. Jed Curry's room."

Turnin', I saw a lady I knew, Mrs. Beverly Birde. And my resistance to the guard disappeared as I was picturin' all the different scenarios that could happen next. I needed to warn her who was here and let her make the choice who she wanted to see. "I'm down here," I called and waved. "Come walk with me." I was careful not to use her name so no one would know she was here. With a nod to the guard, she hurried towards me with a giggle.

"Mrs. Birde, what are you doin' here?"

She gave a small giggle. I ducked inside an empty room so we could talk before she encountered anyone from her past. "I'm tired. Let's sit in here," I told her.

"Oh, that's fine. Should I get the doctor for you?" She still had a giggle in her voice.

"No, there's just so many people hoverin' around me. Well, Chrissy you know is here and Juan Ortiz brought her." I don't know if she realized that Juan was the younger Ortiz brother before. "And then there's Juan's mom Marina and his older brother Paul."

"OH!" She sat down in the chair suddenly and her hand moved to her stomach. I was afraid she was gonna be sick. "Do you need some water?" I moved to the pitcher on the table.

"Yes, yes." She looked as if she were gonna tell me something, then changed her mind. I handed her the water and went to look out the door to be sure we were alone.

She giggled. I must have looked confused as she looked away when I looked at her.

"Mr. Curry, you do realize that except for a couple of ties that hide your back, your hospital gown is open in the back, right?" She giggled even louder and put her hand over her mouth.

"What? WHAT?" I reached around with my good arm and pulled the cloth around my bottom. "Mrs. Birde, I apologize for my oversight. I…I…" I was mortified. A word I learned from readin' that fit this situation so well. I thought of yesterday when I was holdin' the gun on the intruders. My back was to Juan, Chrissy, and Marina….and none of them never said nothing. "I am sorry. I didn't realize." I made sure I stood with my back to the wall.

"I understand." There was still a smile in her voice. She stood and handed me a package wrapped in brown paper. "I came to bring you that from Mr. Heyes and Sheriff Trevors. Well, I guess it was all Mr. Heyes' idea, from what Frank told me."

Still embarrassed, I was glad to have something to look at. It was a new white shirt. When I thought about it, I had no idea what had happened to the shirt I wore out of prison. I smiled. Heyes was thinkin', another step forward.

"Mr. Curry, what do you know of me?"

"Not much." I was lyin' and couldn't look her in the eye, so I played with the buttons on the shirt as I talked. "You're married to Frank Birde, one of the Birde brothers. I heard your father was a banker." I didn't want to give away what I had heard from Marina Ortiz. "And you're particular about the metal birds on your gate."

She scrutinized me closely. I hadn't thought about keepin' my thoughts from my face. "That's right," she said softly. "Is that all you know?"

"Ahh, well."

"It doesn't matter. I think you know more than that. I appreciate your discretion. Thank you for pulling me in here to talk. I know that's what you did. You're not tired. Sore maybe, but not tired. I'm just not sure how much you know. I would like to see Marina, I think, but not the boys or Chrissy. If my history was known in Three Birds, it would embarrass both the Birde family and my siblings from my pa's second wife. Do you understand?"

I nodded; afraid I might say too much. "I'll send Marina in here."

"Mr. Curry, may I share another confidence with you? Something I'm not going to tell Marina, but I'm going to burst if I don't tell someone."

"Mrs. Birde?"

She blushed. "I would not normally tell a man this, but you'll hear it anyway from Frank. I came here to see Doctor St. John. She confirmed it. Frank and I are going to be parents! We never thought we would be blessed with a child." Her face showed her joy. I knew she was a lot younger than her husband.

I wasn't sure what was proper etiquette in this situation, but I knew the smile on my face was big. "Congratulations!"

Still holdin' the back of my gown, I slipped out the door smilin'. I don't know what they said, but Marina Ortiz and Mrs. Beverly Birde talked in there for over half an hour. I didn't see Mrs. Birde leave.

One of the guards had moved to stand outside the door of the room Mrs. Birde and I had used. As I left, I gave him a dirty look; he just shook his head. "Dr. Arden told us that our job is to protect everyone on this floor and your job is to relax, heal and get well. We ain't going away."

"Just don't like the feeling of being guarded all day and night," I growled back at him. I was going to need to talk to Aiden about this.

LOM

I'm worried about leaving Heyes today. I'll be back tonight, and Russell said he will stay until I get home. Still, when Heyes gets lost in his thoughts anything can happen.

The ride from Three Birds to Bridgeport was done mostly in silence. Two US Marshals accompanied me, Frank, and our prisoner, the Circle E foreman, Norwood Brown. Their eyes never stopped searching the road we were traveling, as well as the landscape on both sides. I didn't think anyone was going to try to rescue him. If they tried they wouldn't be successful with four lawmen guarding him. Frank and I brought up the rear.

The judge and lawyers were waiting when we got there. Frank got in contact with the Nebraska governor and the whole thing was kept very quiet. I made sure my testimony was confidential. Chrissy's safety was at stake and the whereabouts of Hannibal Heyes would be a draw to reporters. So, he was only referred to as my ward in the transcripts. And it was made clear multiple times that Christina McWinters was not there.

The state lawyer was a very charismatic and competent man. He got the defendant to confess his associate, Jeremy, had scouted out the ranch and the house. A man Jeremy didn't know hired him, paid him well to see who was at the ranch and get information. Jeremy had gotten a look at the breeding calendar. The foreman of the Circle E was a familiar name, one he knew had been a bounty hunter. Nor Brown jumped at the chance to split five thousand dollars. He made it clear he thought he was after a legitimate wanted dead or alive bounty and that he had no qualms killing his target if she resisted.

The lawyer for the defense kept objecting to each question and each answer his client provided. His client ignored each objection. Norwood Brown liked to talk. Especially when he kept insisting his poster and bounty were legitimate.

The rest was in my testimony. The defense attorney pushed hard to find out the name of my ward until the judge told him to stop or be held in contempt. Norwood Brown was sentenced to five years in the state penitentiary in Fort Madison, Lee County, Iowa. Frank told me on the relaxed ride home that the governor had assured him that Norwood Brown would be buried in the Iowa prison for the next five years.

JED 'KID' CURRY

The guard followed me back to my room. I held my gown shut.

"Aiden, we need to talk," I growled.

He looked at me with eyes blurred by pain medicine.

"What is it, my friend, Jed?"

"I need my pants!"

Trying to laugh through a swollen jaw, Aiden ended up almost cryin'. But my patience was short as was my sympathy.

"Yes, my pants. And food, real food…and I want to go home!" I yelled, stomping my foot.

"OH!" I heard Chrissy's voice to my left. I never let her see this side of me. The side I have to keep locked inside of me, the side that holds my temper. I turned to face her. "Sorry Chrissy darlin', I just want to get out of here. The guards outside the room..."

"Chrissy darlin' scared of guards," she said, starin' out the door at the armed man there. I saw her tremble. So, I opened up my arms to her and she ran into them. I turned to put my back to the wall and held her tight. As she buried her face in my chest, I felt her cryin'.

"Aiden, can the guard be moved to the bottom of the stairwells?" I asked quickly. I would have preferred they were gone altogether. I felt I could not breathe with them around.

"We need their protection." I heard fear in Dr. Arden's voice as I realized he found comfort in the guards.

I needed them out of the way, not just for me, but for Chrissy. With Juan and Paul on alert, I felt safe here. "Aiden." I looked at him over Chrissy's head leanin, on me. "They can stop anyone from comin' up the stairs. That's as good as havin' them at the door."

"But…" I heard the doubt now in his fear.

"And me and Juan and Paul are on alert now. We ain't gonna let nothing happen," I said forcefully.

The doctor still looked doubtful, but I gave him my outlaw stare and he turned away. "Guard!" he called.

Chrissy slipped behind me, and I reached to pull my gown closed. I needed my pants.

"Please station yourself at the bottom of the stairways. No one allowed up here except the two nurses you have seen. NO ONE!"

HEYES

Russell checks in with me so much it's annoying. I know he doesn't know what to make of me. I did the chores that needed to be done and went to my room. I left the door open. I read the paper Russell brought this morning, but I am trying to listen to everything. I keep looking out my door. What I want is not in this paper either. I leave it on the kitchen table for when Lom returns.

In the late afternoon, I grabbed an apple and went out with the horses. Speed of Flight needed grooming and it relaxed me to do it. I gave her my apple core and she thanked me with a nuzzle to my neck. Then, I heard the gate open. It was too early for Lom to be back and too early for the construction workers to be leaving. I went to look for Russell. He had heard it, too. He was armed and standing in the open front door.

I gave a sigh of relief when I saw it was Tommy, the telegraph clerk's son. Then, a wave of panic hit me, and I started to shake. Something must have happened to the Kid. He was hurt, maybe he took a turn for the worse. Maybe he died. I watched Russell take the telegram and tip Tommy. I don't want to read it. Don't want to know if the Kid is dead. If he is, it's all my fault.

"Heyes!" Russell's annoyed voice broke into my thoughts.

He was handing me the telegram. I took it with shaking hands and just looked at it.

"Heyes, read it!"

I looked at him and then at the telegram. I opened it slowly and gave a sigh of relief as I read it. Then the panic returned. I handed it to Russell with shaking hands.

He read it out loud.

Curry Ranch

Three Birds, NE

Will collect Speed of Flight today after four.

Ralston Q York

I backed up until my back hit the wall. Russell hadn't said anything. He didn't look like he was angry at me. He looked like he was trying to work something out in his head.

"Heyes, what words can you say?" he asked.

I shook my head. I backed up. I didn't want to meet this man or any stranger.

"Heyes, I can't handle this myself and I don't have much patience. WHAT WORDS CAN YOU SAY?"

He was yelling, he was demanding. This is still the prison; the other was a dream. If I don't do as he says, he will hit me with the billy club. I don't remember what he asked me to do. My knees buckle.

I hear a sigh. I look up and it's not a prison guard in front of me but Russell. I try to control my breathing. "I'm sorry I yelled, Heyes. I need your help with this."

I stood up. He didn't ask me to do anything. Just tell him what words I could say. "Kid. Lom. N…no," I said.

He thought. "I'll do the talking. He already paid the stud fees, right?"

I nodded. And then I thought of two more words. They didn't come out right when I tried to say them. I wrote, "Practice get horse ready."

ASJ*****ASJ

I spent the next few hours with Speed of Flight. I was going to miss her, and she patiently listened to me practicing my words. Russell had sent one of the workers down to the gate to wait for Mr. York.

I heard the gate open and close but couldn't hear the conversation. I knew what I needed to do. I had to control my fears. The Kid controls his fears and his pain. I can do this. I only need to bring the horse out and say two words. Russell will do the rest. I finished Speed of Flight's travel preparations and laid my head against her nose. She seemed to know I need strength and wants to help.

"Mr. Heyes, would you please bring out Speed of Flight?" I heard Russell call as he told me he would. A shudder runs through my body. I breathed deeply then put my shoulders back and tried to stand tall. I had seen the Kid do this. I walked the horse out and over to the two men standing there.

"Mr. Ralston Q York, this is Mr. Hannibal Heyes," Russell said the line we had practiced.

I steadied myself and reached out my hand. "Hi," I said.

"Wow! Hannibal Heyes! It's a pleasure to meet you." I nodded and tried to smile through my fears.

"Mr. York, we strongly believe that Speed of Flight is pregnant." Russell said he would try to keep the conversation away from me.

He smiled broadly then it faded. "I want to apologize to you for the actions of my foreman. I knew he had been a bounty hunter. He told me he wanted to give it up and I thought I was giving him a chance to do just that."

"We understand it wasn't you." I heard Russell's words but was glad he was armed. Two of his workers came and stood behind us. I found comfort in their numbers.

"Thank you for that." I thought Mr. York seemed contrite but I didn't trust him. Speed of Flight likes him; she's happy to see him..

"Mr. Brown's under arrest and will stand trial. Fool's errand though. His target's not here." Russell had told me he wanted to enforce that Chrissy wasn't here and make it seem like she didn't live here. But Ralston Q York was just embarrassed. He had no poker face, even I can read his emotions.

However, I saw real emotion for Speed of Flight in his face. And the horse returned his feelings.

"I'm heading back to Bridgeport now. Want to catch the evening train. It looks like you took very good care of my girl. Very nice breeding operation you got here."

"Thanks," I told him. After using my only other word, I retreated to the stable.

"He's got other horses to attend to," I heard Russell explain. I hid in the first stall and watched the men shake hands. I held myself in control until I heard the gate open then close. Then the trembling was more violent than it had been since I was in prison. I shrank into the corner of the stall and sat. The world dropped away as I started rocking in my own safe world.

ASJ*****ASJ

"Heyes, can you hear me?"

I heard a distant voice, but I'm safe where I am. I want to stay here.

"Heyes, it's Lom." I felt someone kneeling in front of me. They put their hands on me. They're going to hurt me. I rocked more intensely to get back into my safe world.

But the hands moved to under my elbows and forced me to stand up. "Heyes, can you hear me? It's Lom."

It was a trick. Lom was not in my safe place. No one was in my safe place. I'd let the Kid in if he asked. But he's not here.

"Let's go into the house." The hands led me into my room in the Kid's house. "It's Lom, Heyes. You're safe."

Lom? Lom is my friend. I trust Lom. I try to listen to what he is saying but it sounds so far away, like he's talking to me underwater. Someone else has come into my room with us.

"Sheriff Trevors, I'm sorry. I don't know what happened. He did so well meeting Ralston York." I know the voice, but I can't remember his name. I can't remember if he's a friend or a bad man.

"Heyes met with Mr. York?" Lom asked with surprise in his voice. I stay quiet. I can't remember what happened. Maybe they'll say so I can remember.

"Yes, I told him I needed him to help me. Mr. York would have been very disappointed if he didn't get to meet either Kid Curry or Hannibal Heyes. Heyes did very well, shook hands, and said hi.

"Heyes shook hands and talked to a stranger?" Lom asked.

"He did very well. He was quiet, just petted the horse. It looked like he was talking to her, but I didn't hear any words," the voice answered. Russell, the man's name was Russell. Was he a friend? I remember trying to be strong like the Kid and control my fear.

"Heyes, you did all that? I'm proud of you!" Lom tried to look into my eyes, but I looked down.

"He even said thanks when Mr. York complimented the ranch," added Russell.

Lom was talking to me again. I'm not sure what he's saying. But I remembered doing what Russell was saying. It was hard. But I did it. I didn't let the fear get me until after, when I thought about what I had done. I didn't know if Mr. York was a threat or not when I talked to him. I still did it.

"Heyes. Heyes!" Lom needs my attention. He's the only one in the room with me. I know where I am. I look around and find my chalkboard. "Feed horses," I write.

"I'll help you do that in a few minutes," Lom told me. "You did very good today, Heyes. I'm proud of you and I'm sure the Kid will be proud of you, too, when I tell him."

He means it. I did good. There's something I should ask him. I can't remember. Then I remember and write, "Trial?"

"Come on, I'll tell you about it while we take care of the horses."

LOM

I thought I was coming back to disaster when a pacing Russell met me by the blacksmith shop. He started by telling me Heyes was sitting in the corner of a stall in the stable rocking aimlessly and he didn't know what to do. He couldn't get his attention. He left one of his men to watch Heyes from a distance so that he didn't hurt himself or something and came down here to wait for me. While we walked up there, he started to tell me the whole story. I knew this was another one of those tipping points for Heyes. I wish I had some guidebook that told me how to talk to him, what to do. When Heyes is lost, I feel lost, too. I wish the Kid were here. He has patience. He just seems to know what to say.

I know I have to praise Heyes for his actions, but I'm devastated to see him rocking vigorously. He doesn't hear me, doesn't respond. I step outside of the stable and curse the Wyoming Territorial Prison system that thinks men must be broken, not reformed. By all standards, the Kid and Heyes were reformed before they went to prison. I wish I could have made the governor see that earlier.

Finally, I got Heyes in his room. I keep telling him I'm proud of him and that he did good, but I'm not sure he hears me. But then he picked up his chalkboard and told me he had to feed the horses and asked me about the trial. He was back, but I wondered if tonight's occurrences had tipped him toward recovery or to the world in his head.

JED 'KID' CURRY

Dr. Arden let Juan bring us food back from the diner across the street. I had them bring dinner for the two guards, too. I know they are just doin' what they were hired for but then so are the prison guards. I don't take to human beings guardin' each other, even for protection. I'm strong. I'll take care of my family.

"Aiden, I really do want to go home," I said over dinner in front of everyone.

I thought a frightened look wisped through his eyes. "You're not ready, Jed. Your fever spiking at night still concerns me."

I thought for a moment and came up with my solution. I needed to get home. Heyes was weighing on my thoughts all day. He looked so guilty when he was here. I knew Lom would take good care of him but I think he needs me. "Well, I'll tell you what, Aiden. I'll spend tonight and tomorrow night here if you promise I can have diner food."

"Done."

"But the next day we're goin' home and if you don't think I'm well enough to leave, I'd appreciate you comin' to the ranch with us." I didn't say it, but I thought the ranch would be a good place for him to heal, too. And a place for him to stop bein' frightened. I hoped he thought of it as a safe place.

"Agreed, although I'm sure your night fevers will not be gone by then and I will be accompanying you home."

Paul talked to me later that night and said he and his ma would be leavin' when we did. Chrissy and Marina had rekindled a friendship, although guarded on Chrissy's part. She was always listenin' to make sure Marina said nothing negative about me or Heyes. Mrs. Ortiz had asked me to call her Marina, like Chrissy did. She thanked me, quietly, for her 'visit' earlier that day. I know she had tears, I hoped of joy, in her eyes when she came into my room after visitin' with Mrs. Birde.

Juan brought a newspaper back with breakfast the next mornin'. He had it folded so I couldn't miss the story on the bottom of the front page:

WARDEN OF WYOMING TERRITORIAL PRISON IN CHEYENNE

RELIEVED OF HIS POSITION

I read and reread the article. I tried to sort out my feelin's about this man that had tried to kill me. He certainly has something against Kid Curry. But I don't know him nor the name Fitzjohn. Maybe he was on a train we robbed. But he left Heyes alone in prison and beat me near death. It's me he hates. I kept that puzzle near the front of my mind but knew I had other priorities now.

Now that I knew when I was leavin', I worked on getting' stronger every day. I walked the corridor for hours. I asked Juan to buy me a new blacksmith hammer a pound heavier than the one I had. I had been needin' one but never had the time to buy it. I swung it around my head and down to my knees in circles. I brought it up and down and found my muscles protestin' then startin' to regain their strength. I cleaned Heyes' gun and gave it back to Chrissy to carry. She knows guns and gun safety. I'll be glad to be home.

When it came time to leave, my legs still hurt but they were recoverin'. My temple was healin' quickly, and the constant pain was finally gone. But my back healed slower than I would have liked. Swingin' my hammer helped with my strength but I know the movements had caused some of the lacerations to bleed. Chrissy tended to them each night and I asked her not to let the good doctor see them.

And I was angry, something else I am working hard to control. I told Aiden that I was angry about Warden Fitzjohn. I don't know why he hates me because only hate could drive those vicious lashes with a cat o' nine tails. And the warden had never before whipped one of the prisoners himself.

Finally, the morning arrived, and we bid farewell to Marina and Paul. As I had thought, Dr. Arden had decided he needed to accompany us to the ranch. It was only a little over a week since Heyes and I had left there headed for his second parole hearing; it seemed like an eternity.

HEYES

Lom doesn't understand, but I also need to read the old newspapers.

"Heyes, I found out some of the older newspapers are in Three Birds. Frank Birde says the mercantile keeps copies in the back, but they don't have anything too old. The ones they had archived there were all lost in the fire."

He says it so casually, 'the fire'. That fire almost killed the Kid, my cousin, my best friend, my strength.

"Heyes, did you hear me?" Lom reminds me when I start to get lost in my thoughts. He used to yell, now he just talks loud.

I started thinking about what he's said. The fire was five or so months ago. What I needed might be there. "When?" I wrote. I didn't have to hesitate between letters, the letters flowed out.

"When was the fire or when can you go there?"

"Go…g…go!" I felt proud I got the word out.

"Nice job, Heyes. Have you been practicing that word?"

I shook my head. I don't try too many words. I'm embarrassed about the nonsense sounds that usually come out when I try, even in front of Lom and the Kid. Why would Lom think I wanted to know when the fire was. I know when it happened. The Kid was burned so badly he couldn't visit me. He saved Juan and Jeff Birde's lives. He was a hero. He said he just did what anyone would do. But no one else I've ever known could have done what he did. But he almost died. I was sure he was dead. Sometimes in my dreams, he is dead. I am alone and I get very frightened. He's my best friend, the only family I've had since I was young. We're going to grow old together. Now the three of us will grow old together, the Kid, me, and Chrissy. I need to ask him how the burns on his foot healed. Everyone forgets when he's hurt; he hides it well.

"Heyes, are you with me here?" Lom intruded through my thoughts. I looked at him blankly, I don't know what he had said. I think he's starting to lose patience trying to talk with me. I looked down, ashamed. "If the paper you're looking for is not in Three Birds, you can find it in Bridgeport. They have every back issue they ever published there."

First Three Birds…but not until the Kid comes home. " Soon?" I wrote.

"I'll send a telegram to Juan and see if I can get an update.