Winter's Refuge
Chapter 41
HEYES
Lom told me he got an update on the Kid and he should be home in a couple of days. Dr. Arden is coming home with him. Lom didn't know why. The Kid must be hurt worse than I thought if he needs a doctor to travel with him. I went down to the blacksmith shop this morning and cleaned up the back room. When we were there before with the kids, I saw they hid another bottle of whiskey and more cookies under the cot. I should have remembered earlier. The cookies will attract mice. Lom told the Kid we should get a stable dog. I think we need some cats to control the mice.
Russell told Lom I did good when Speed of Flight left. I practiced and used two words. I pretended I was talking to the Kid. But afterwards, darkness crept into my mind until my thoughts were consumed, and I was in the dark cell with no way out. Lom saved me, again.
Me and Lom are riding into Three Birds today. We are going to the new mercantile. Older newspapers are there. The old mercantile burnt down. I want to ask Lom how the fire started but I don't have the words. This is my first time in the town. I feel safe on the ranch. I'm not safe here. People are staring at me. As we ride down the main street, out of habit I look for the sheriff's office. Panic hits me at first because I recognize the name, Sheriff Frank Birde. I want to turn around, but Lom just keeps riding. Then, I remember Sheriff Frank Birde is the Kid's friend and Lom's friend. And I'm not wanted anymore. This is the first time I felt that freedom. The panic doesn't leave me, but it lessens enough for me to control. I'm not really free; I'm on parole. I can go right back to prison anytime I break one of the rules, and there are a lot of rules. I checked on the map that Three Birds is in Cheyenne County, even though Lom assured me it was.
I look down at Fall's Bell. He's a good horse, steady and reliable. I think everyone is staring at me. If I look at my saddle, I can't see them and I'm safe. I let my horse follow Lom's. I keep reminding myself that I need to see the older newspapers and I can only do that here. My eyes are drawn up to what must have been the old mercantile. There is little left of the building. I can see it used to have two stories. It doesn't anymore. This building tried to kill the Kid, but he is strong, strong enough to save Juan and someone else. He got all three of them out of that building. Now it is just a blackened mass of twisted wood.
"Heyes!" Lom's voice stops my thoughts. He didn't yell, just spoke loud enough for me to hear. I looked for him. He had turned down an alley and I had not followed. Where are we going? Isn't the mercantile on the main street? Is this a trap? I can't do this. I have to do this. Lom said we have to do this today because Becky's Baby is coming tomorrow, and the Kid will be home any day. We're waiting for another telegram to tell us when exactly. And I need to see these papers.
Lom has brought me to the back loading dock of the mercantile. There is a man I don't know waiting for us. I don't think Lom knows him either, but he smiles and says, "Hello, you Jeff Birde?"
"Sure am. Glad to meet you, Sheriff Trevors, Mr. Heyes."
He sounds friendly but I don't trust friendly. I don't trust many people and not a friendly stranger.
Lom dismounted so I do too, grabbing my clipboard and a notebook I found at the ranch. "Nice to finally meet you." Lom is talking to him and shaking his hand.
This Jeff Birde smiles at me but does not approach or offer his hand. I know the name. The Kid has mentioned him as a friend, but that doesn't mean he won't hurt me.
"I got a place set up in my office that you can use, Mr. Heyes, private and all. Sheriff, would you help me move the papers? My arm ain't recovered all the way from the fire."
I remember. Jeff Birde is one of the people who the Kid saved from the fire. I looked at his arm. I couldn't help myself; I reached out and ran my finger along the healing skin from his hand to his elbow. He didn't pull it away, but I realized what I had done and stepped back and looked down. I shouldn't touch a stranger, especially an injury. I don't think that's one of my parole rules, but it's something my ma wouldn't like.
"Mr. Heyes, it's okay. You can touch it. It's sensitive with all the new skin but you didn't hurt it." Jeff's voice was friendly. Maybe I hadn't done anything wrong. "If it wasn't for Jed pulling that beam off of us, I would have lost my life, not just injured my arm."
I was trying to process what he was saying. I wasn't in trouble. He wasn't mad. I hadn't broken a parole rule.
"HEYES!" Lom's insistent voice broke into my thoughts. When I hear him say my name like that, I know I got lost in my thoughts, again.
"Mr. Heyes, please come this way. If there is anything you need, just let me know. We are a mercantile, you know." He sounded like he was joking and he was smiling, so I try to grin. I wish I were back at the ranch, but I need what's here. I need to read these papers.
LOM
Heyes settled comfortably into Jeff Birde's office in the mercantile. He seemed to know a lot about how to handle Heyes. The Kid probably talks some to him. The office seems to be a place Heyes would feel safe. It's brightly lit and private. I helped Jeff carry the newspaper archives into the office and stack them on a side table.
"You got everything you need, Mr. Heyes?"
Heyes looked around carefully. He takes questions like this very seriously now and thinks hard before he responds.
"Good. Th…thanks," he finally answered. He held out his hand for Jeff Birde to shake and quickly withdrew it when they touched.
"Good. That's a word I haven't heard you say in a while." He looked embarrassed so I quickly added, "Door open or closed?"
It was another question for him to think about. He looked up and down the hallway leading to the office thoughtfully. He found his chalkboard and wrote, "Open," and held his fingers together to show 'a little.' He sat down behind the desk and picked up the top paper. I don't think he noticed when we left.
I knew what I wanted to do, needed to do. The same thing Heyes had done when we rode into town. I hadn't been in Three Birds in six months until I met Frank and the US Marshals here. Then all of my attention had been focused on transporting the prisoner, Norwood Brown, to Bridgeport.
Now I could take the time to look around. I'd go back and check on Heyes in an hour. I was afraid reading the stories in the newspapers he would get lost in his thoughts and forget his purpose. I still don't know what he's looking for, but he seems like a man on a mission. I like to see him with purpose. It's good for him.
It's a nice town, looks like it's growing. I see new buildings. Name Birde is on a lot of things. I cross the street and stand in front of the burned down building that was the old mercantile. The Kid had told me it was one of the original buildings, built by Jeff's father. All I can think of is the horrors of that day. In my mind, I can hear the screams coming out of there. One of the support beams is still standing and I wonder if the one the Kid lifted was as huge as that one. Frank told me the whole story when we rode back after Nor Brown's trial. Said that he never saw anyone as strong as the Kid, and no one so stubbornly determined. He was grateful he had saved his nephew, Jeff's, life. Said the Birde family owed him a great debt.
I'm sure the Kid just shrugged that off. Since he's been in prison, he's strong and focused, determined to take care of his family, but his own self-worth is low.
I walked around to the back of the building to the door where the Kid, Jeff, and Juan exited. Even after all these months, this close I can still smell the burnt wood. I stood outside that door for a long time imagining the Kid inside, lifting a beam no man should have been able to lift. He carried Juan out and led Jeff. I have seen his burns on his temple and shoulder, his knee, and his foot. I never heard him complain about any of them. He groaned when he was asleep, but when anyone was around, he never showed his pain. I wondered how much of that pain he was holding inside. And now more had been added.
It had rained since the fire, but it had only added to the stench of the destroyed building. I thought how Heyes had traced the long burn on Jeff's arm from elbow to hand with his finger. What was he thinking? Did it make the fire more real to him? He had seen the Kid's burns two weeks later. It's hard to tell how Heyes' mind works now.
I realized I spent over an hour looking at this pile of twisted wood. I went to check on Heyes. I called him when I first entered the hallway so I wouldn't startle him. I need not have done that. He was absorbed in his quest. He had a new stack on the desk that I think was the ones he had read. He had made a lot of notes on his paper and was absorbed in his reading when I knocked on the open door. He looked up guiltily, then down submissively.
"Heyes just checking on how you're doing?"
He looked sad as he wrote, "Time go?"
"You done?"
He shook his head, but started to pick up his things.
"If you're not done, it's not time to go. Like I said, just came to check on you."
He looked confused as he processed my answer, then gave me the grin I used to see all the time. "Good. Thanks. Lom," he said the three words slowly.
"I'll be back in another hour just to make sure all is well, but take all the time you need. You find what you are looking for yet?"
He nodded and pointed to his papers. He returned to his reading.
I left him and went in search of Frank to see if he wanted to have a drink with me.
HEYES
I took my time and tried to concentrate just on the articles I was searching for. But I found a lot had been going on in these last few months. How much have I missed out on in the last five years? I found a brief article on one of the back pages about how a local hero had saved four people, including two young boys, as a side collapsed during a barn raising. Said the local hero had experienced a leg wound from the falling wood, but everyone he saved was fine. It didn't mention the Kid by name, but I knew it was him. I was proud of him and, when I thought of it, I was glad his name wasn't mentioned.
I found four articles that were just what I was looking for and wrote down every detail mentioned. They gave me a starting place. Near the bottom of the pile, in one of the oldest papers, I saw the headline, "Three Birds Mercantile Burns to the Ground." The smaller headline read, "Heroic Local Man Saves Two in Miracle Rescue." I knew that the Kid was that man. I must have heard the details of the rescue before, but I didn't remember. The article was short and didn't name the Kid or Juan, just Jeff Birde. I reread it twice and couldn't contain the tears from the horror the Kid must have endured that day. I saw what's left of the building when we rode in today. I don't see how he survived, much less saved Juan and Jeff Birde.
He has always kept things inside of him. I had to force him to talk about things ever since we were kids. Since we grew up, I get him drunk when it's just the two of us. I drank little on those days but because I never knew if the drunken Kid wanted to cry or fight when he finally talked about traumatic events. We need to talk about a lot of things, but I can't talk. Dr. Arden said he had tried to get the Kid to talk to him, but he politely refused. I need to add this to my list of things to do and not forget to do it.
I cleaned up the office and stacked the newspapers in reverse date order. I made sure each was folded neatly. I packed my notes and my chalkboard in my satchel. I sat and waited with it on my lap until Lom came back for me.
LOM
I stopped by the telegraph office to pick up the ranch mail, a job Juan usually does several times a week. Today there were two telegrams waiting for the ranch.
First, Becky's Baby was going to be delivered to the ranch tomorrow by the owner of the Box Hickory Ranch, Calvin Yankoff Senor and his son Junior. Frank had sent telegrams and checked them out. The ranch did not need any more unpleasant surprises like Norwood Brown. It did not give a time, but everything was ready for her.
The second telegram was from the Kid. Juan probably sent it for him. We finally had a date. They were taking the train home tomorrow.
HEYES
"Heyes?"
I stood up when Lom called. He had been drinking. There are times I'd like a drink, but I'm waiting until the Kid tells me we'll have a drink together. I haven't forgotten he was mad at our first reunion. He said we'd talk about it when the time is right. He'll tell me when the time is. I still don't know why he was mad.. And when he's not busy. He works so hard and he's doing good. He's made this ranch our home.
"Heyes, do you think you can come into the store? There's something I'd like to show you." Lom draped his arm around my shoulders. "I'll stay right by you."
I didn't want to go, but Lom was pulling me there without waiting for my answer. We entered the mercantile through a dark green curtain and stood in back of the counter. I looked around but only saw Jeff Birde, no customers.
"I've closed the doors for a minute, Mr. Heyes. It's just us," Jeff told me.
Still, I let my eyes roam over the store, looking for movement. This could be some kind of a trap. I have to be on alert.
"Heyes, look here." Lom motioned me to the middle of the counter to the display set up there.
I looked closer and picked up a detailed belt buckle. Turning it over, I saw the Kid's mark. I looked at each object in the display. Belt buckles, window hinges and locks, a knife with a whittled handle in the shape of a cougar and a set of candlesticks. Each had the Kid's mark, a C with a tiny gun hidden somewhere. "Kid?" I asked Lom. Where had he found the time to make these? Each one had delicate, intricate, time-consuming details. This must be why he always had more money than I thought.
"They are so popular, I can't keep them in stock. He does beautiful work." Jeff picked up a belt buckle. "You ever see that buckle my Uncle Frank wears? Jed made that for him."
Lom studied one of the hinges. "If only he believed in his talent," he said sadly.
I found my chalkboard. "When he time?" I wrote and showed it to Lom.
"Probably at night when he's in the blacksmith shop alone or early in the morning. He doesn't sleep much anymore, does he?" Lom looked at me to answer that question and I realized he was right. Me and the Kid had made a deal months ago that I would eat the mush in prison, and he would get some sleep. But he doesn't sleep much. He goes to bed at the same time as Chrissy and me, but he roams the house early in the morning. He's up early, often before the sun. The Kid I remembered could sleep deep anywhere he happened to lay his head. He can't do that anymore. Prison changes everyone. Another thing I need to talk to him about. Even a strong man needs sleep.
JED 'KID' CURRY
I sat on the bench on the platform as Juan bought the tickets for me and him and Chrissy and Dr. Arden to go to Bridgeport this mornin'. I'm embarrassed to return home. People there called me a hero, but now they'll see I'm nothing but an ex-con pretendin' to be good people. The hard bench hurts my back. I've lost weight so my pants are looser on my thighs, but it is still painful to wear them.
I need to get home to the ranch. I need to get back to Heyes. I miss him and I'm worried about him. I don't remember much of the ride from the prison to the hospital, but when I think about it, all I see is Heyes' guilty face starin' at me. I remember him bein' the one in the hospital room at first when the pain was all consumin'. Then he was gone. He was horrified when I took the choice to spend the night in prison, but we didn't really get to talk before they took me out of there in shackles. I think the shackles hurt him more than they hurt me, hurt his spirit. I did get to tell him I was proud of him. I can't imagine the courage it had to have taken for him to confess to the board like that. So, I'm excited for us to be together, again. We are always better together. But I worried how he had fared at the ranch with Lom.
HEYES
I'm excited. I found some of the articles I was looking for and they had the details that I needed. Three Birds was not as bad as I had expected. I know Lom and Jeff Birde were protecting me all they could. I said, "thanks" but that's not enough. I need more words, but I have a plan I need to work on first. I start to review the things I had learned today.
LOM
"Heyes, you did good today," I said as we rode side by side out of town.
He nodded. I thought he had a good day. He appeared to have found what he was looking for in the newspapers. And we saw the metal and woodwork the Kid produced for the store. I think he got lost in his thoughts when reading some of the newspaper articles, but he came back to the present quickly when I called his name. And his darkness was absent. Maybe he was tipping to recovery.
"Heyes, a couple of telegrams came for the ranch today. The first one confirmed that Becky's Baby is coming tomorrow. They want to pick their stud when they come. Can you help by bringing out our boys for them to see?"
He looked at me in fear and shook his head. Then he stared at Fall's Bell's mane.
"Is there some way you can figure out, so you bring out the horses, maybe without the owners seeing you?"
Heyes shrugged his shoulders but did not look up at me. I hoped he would try and figure out a way to help me. "Frank checked the family out real well. They're no threat."
He rode in silence. I didn't want to say that's alright, you can go hide. I want him involved. I told him about the second telegram. I thought it would make him happier.
"Other telegram said the Kid, Chrissy, and Juan will be back tomorrow and they're bringing Dr. Arden with them."
He looked up at me and his face was frozen in fear and guilt. I didn't know what to say so I stopped my horse next to his. "What's wrong?"
His eyes were pleading with me to understand but I did not. "Kid…Kid," he said quietly as if lost. He took out his chalkboard and balanced on the saddle in front of him. "Kid say H go away leave," he wrote. And I remembered we had this talk when we first came home.
"Told me the same thing. He just wanted to sleep. Remember, we talked about this already?"
I don't think he remembered. He was distraught. "I still here."
"You're right where you are supposed to be. Right where the Kid expects you to be."
Slowly, he shook his head. "Leave," he wrote.
I pulled Fall's Bell around and put my finger under his chin to raise his eyes to mine. "No. You live here with the Kid and Chrissy and Juan. The Kid was just hurting and wanted to sleep, that's all."
A flicker of hope crossed those brown eyes. His emotions showed on his face now. We stayed there quiet until he finally wrote, "Stay now. Ask K tomorrow."
JED 'KID' CURRY
The train ride to Bridgeport was uncomfortable. I settled Aiden next to the window with his broken arm toward Chrissy sitting next to him. I took the aisle seat and propped my legs up on the empty seat across from me. Juan sat next to my feet. A middle-aged man, probably a salesman, had the window seat next to him. Sittin' straight and a bit forward relieved some of my back pain but stretched my leg muscles. Each time the train jerked or went around a bend, I had to brace myself to try and keep my back from the seat. It didn't always work. I was grateful for the shirt Heyes had sent. I don't know what I would have worn otherwise.
Like I used to, Juan fell asleep almost before we left the station. Or at least he appeared to. He was the only one of us armed as I knew he had his knives in his belt and boot. Well, really, Chrissy was armed. Heyes' gun was back in her pocketbook. I had taken the bullets out, though, to avoid any accidents. Three of them were in my pants pocket, just in case of trouble. I closed my eyes and just tried to rest when I heard the man next to Juan speak.
"Hi, pretty lady. If that man leanin' on you is bothering you, I'd be happy for you and me to go for a walk to the dinin' car and I'd buy you a drink." I knew Dr. Arden was sleepin' on her. She said it was good and that he needed sleep.
I didn't open my eyes, but I growled, "You speakin' to my wife, mister?"
I heard Chrissy giggle and the man sputter, "Sorry, ma'am, I didn't see your ring."
He tripped over one of my legs as he tried to step over them in his hurry to get out. He grabbed the armrest of my seat to steady himself. I opened my eyes and gave him my best outlaw stare.
"Sorry, sir, sorry. Innocent mistake," he said, as he hurried down the aisle.
It had felt good not to be polite to someone, to growl and show my irritation. Juan was awake now and chuckled as Chrissy giggled again. "Good. Jed be Kid Curry."
ASJ*****ASJ
Juan had suggested that he rent a wagon in Bridgeport and, although I bristled at the suggestion at first, I saw the wisdom in a wagon ride to the ranch after fifteen minutes of being jostled on our train journey. I tried to close my eyes, but my thoughts kept me awake. Worries about Heyes were foremost on my mind. Then the ranch and the visitin' mares. I couldn't remember if new ones were comin'. I thought of the beautiful mare, Speed of Flight, that was there when I left. She should be back to her home by now. And I thought of the ranch and our horses. We had two pregnant mares of our own due to foal in a couple of months. And I thought of reopenin' the blacksmith shop and all the people I had let down by delayin' my return for about a week. They seem impatient when I'm away for one night in Cheyenne. And I thought how they would greet me, a bald ex-con back into their community. Even the floppy hat Juan bought me and the bandanas I tie around my head in the smithy ain't gonna hide that. A flash of shame ran through me, and I lost some of the straightness in my back. I did what I had to do, I told myself. It was my fault. I hadn't reported Heyes had picked up the gun when I should have. I deserved the punishment. And I could not stand to see Heyes have to go to a roomin' house for men on parole without a job. He wouldn't have stayed out of prison for a week. No, I told myself, I had done what I needed to do to keep Heyes, my family, safe. All the pain was worth it. I'd do it again to keep him safe, to let him heal. I was lookin' forward to givin' him a bear hug when we got home. Don't know if I can swing him around right now, but the bear hug should set things right between us.
When the train got to Bridgeport, Aiden was still sleepin' leanin' against Chrissy's shoulder, his arm restin', protected by Juan's jacket, in her lap. She didn't seem to mind. "Good doctor need sleep. Chrissy darlin' good," she repeated to me each time I asked her how she was doin'.
Juan had to lift my legs off of the seat next to him as they got stiff durin' the ride. That movement started the cramps. I stood up and stretched. It gave me some relief, but not a lot. I ignored the cramps and reached up for our travel bags, but Juan grabbed them first.
"Got the bags, Jed. You help Miss Chrissy and Dr. Arden off the train. I'm goin' ahead and rent that wagon we talked about." He looked at me with a question, but I nodded my agreement. I couldn't have ridden a horse right now without pain.
HEYES
The Yankoffs, from the Box Hickory Ranch, came early the next morning. Russell and his crew were just starting the ever-present noise of saws and hammers. I was so used to it now that it was comforting. I had milked the cow and carefully gathered the eggs. I have to concentrate when I gather the eggs. If I get lost in my thoughts, I drop them. Lom doesn't show it but I know that makes him mad. I didn't sleep last night trying to think of a way to help Lom and I thought of a way, if I could set it up in time.
I went out and divided the breeding paddock into two. It was made to do that, but it took me an hour to get the boards in place so that the horses could not see each other. They could still smell the other's presence, but it was fine for our purpose. Lom was busy with Russell this morning so I cooked breakfast and left it on the stove so he could eat when he had time. I looked out the front door when I heard the gate open. It was the two men bringing their mare.
I tapped Lom on the shoulder, pointed to the front door. I heard his sigh as I went out the back.
As I heard him greet Calvin Yankoff and Junior, I led two of our studs into the divided paddock I had created. I saw Lom and he nodded to me.
"Here are our two proven studs, Summer's Song and Fall's Legend," he told them. "Both have produced extraordinary foals."
From my hiding point in the stable, I watched the men approach the horses.
"Magnificent, just magnificent both of them," the senior Yankoff exclaimed.
"I like that one." Junior pointed to Fall's Legend. The men all moved closer to the Fall's Legend's side of the paddock.
Quietly, I moved Summer's Song back into the stable and replaced him with our newest young stud, Fall's Whisper. When done, I knocked on the dividing wall hoping Lom would understand. Then I retreated into my hiding spot in the stable. The Yankoffs seemed friendly and safe. Still, I didn't trust them. Lom didn't either. He's wearing his gun.
They decided on Fall's Legend after all. No one could argue with their decision. He's one of the most magnificent horses I have ever seen. Lom told me his sire was still at Winter's Refuge and even in his senior years he was still elegant. I watched the younger man, really no more than a boy of about fifteen, whisper to his father. His father smiled.
"We heard that Kid Curry owns this ranch. Is he here? My son would sure like to meet him. He reads all of his dime novels."
Lom cast a glance to where I was hiding. How did he know where I was? I needed to decide if I was going to come out. I had done it for Russell. Lom is my friend; he will protect me. I left the stable and went to stand in the paddock near Fall's Legend. I felt safer with the fence between us.
Lom looked proud of me. "Mr. Yankoff, Junior, the Kid is not here today, but let me introduce you to Hannibal Heyes."
Junior's eyes grew big. "The Hannibal Heyes, leader of the Devil's Hole Gang with Kid Curry?"
I put my hand through the fence, "Hi."
Mr. Yankoff stepped forward and shook my hand heartily.
Junior's excitement spilled into his words. "The kids at school are never going to believe I met Hannibal Heyes! How is it to be partners with Kid Curry?"
"Good." I grinned, happy to have been asked a question I could answer.
Lom stepped over and handed Mr. Yankoof an envelope. "Here's your receipt and the contract. The rest is due when you pick her up. Now don't you two have a train to catch?"
JED 'KID' CURRY
The wagon ride home was uneventful. I rode up front with Juan and Chrissy sat in the bed with Aiden. When we turned up Old Cummings Road, my responsibilities dropped back on me almost like a yoke on an ox.
I stared at the closed blacksmith shop and took a deep breath. I'd go down there tonight and make sure it was ready to open in the mornin'.
"Gate's open!"
At Juan's exclamation, my eyes snapped around to the road ahead of us. "Slow down." Nothing looked wrong, but I could see two horses I didn't recognize leavin' the house. "Drive normally but be on alert."
As we got closer, I relaxed a bit. I could see Lom standin' near the breedin' paddock and I thought I saw Heyes standin' just inside near a horse.
"They don't look like a threat," Juan said of the horsemen.
"Bad?" Chrissy asked, her attention, too, focused on the men ridin' towards us.
They pulled their horses in front of our wagon, forcin' us to stop.
"Kid Curry!" The boy jumped off his horse and ran towards me. "Nobody will believe me, meetin' Hannibal Heyes and Kid Curry!"
Lom was headin' towards us. Heyes had disappeared. I realized these men must be droppin' off a mare.
"Becky's Baby?" I heard Chrissy ask from the back of the wagon. She had moved to the far side of the wagon bed and Aiden was sittin' next to her protectively.
The older man took off his hat. "You must be Mrs. Curry. Your directions got us here very easily. Thank you."
I climbed down from the wagon seat, hidin' my grimace as I jumped the last foot and my thighs protested.
"I'm Jed Curry. Thank you for choosin' our ranch." I reached my hand up to the man on his horse.
"Calvin Yankoff. My son, Junior."
Lom had arrived by our wagon. "Well, looks like you got to meet Kid Curry after all. Don't you have a train to catch in Bridgeport tonight?"
Lom's reminder made the goodbyes quick, and I sighed in relief as they left. Juan held his hand for me to get back into the wagon.
"Think I'll walk the rest of the way. I think I saw Heyes out in the paddock. He met with those men?"
Lom nodded. "Kid, before you see Heyes, need to tell you something."
"I saw. He's makin' progress!"
I couldn't wait to see him and tell him how proud I was and broke into a very gentle trot headin' for the stable. Lom said something behind me, but I didn't hear.
"Heyes! You here?" I called as I entered the stable. I saw movement in the visitin' mare's stall and entered.
"Heyes!" I saw him brushin' the new horse. He looked up at me in surprise. No matter, I took a few large steps and swept him up in a warm bear hug. He kept his arms stiff at his side. I wasn't recovered enough to swing him around in a circle, but I tried. I was so happy to see him well and healin'.
It wasn't until I set him down, that I saw the look on his face, guilt, sadness, and fear. "You scared of me?" I asked, probably a little too loud.
"Sorry, Kid, sorry."
I gave him a big smile. "Nothing to be sorry about, partner. I broke the agreement. It's done. It's the past. We don't need to talk about it. But look at you. Three words together! And I saw you meetin' with those men! I'm proud of you!"
It was so good to be home. Chrissy and Heyes were home to me. I'd dreamed of bein' here when I was in the hospital. I needed to be here.
"NO!" Heyes yelled and left me standin' there lookin' at his back.
ASJ*****ASJ
Lom explained to me Heyes thought I wanted him to leave, to go away. I wouldn't have understood if I hadn't seen his reaction to my arrival. He had gone to his room and stayed there.
Chrissy and Juan listened to Lom's explanation, too, along with the promise to expand on their adventures while we were gone. I stayed at the kitchen table after the others had gone about their lives, tryin' to think of the words to say to Heyes. More than anything else, I was angry, ANGRY at his response. And hurt that he would think I would ever ask him to leave.
Finally, I stood, stretched, and went to Heyes' room. The door was open, and I heard Chrissy's voice scoldin' him. "Why you think Jed ever want you to leave? You know that wrong."
I could hear scratchin' of chalk on his board.
"No, no, no. Jed no tell you to go away for good. He just want sleep. Jed tell Chrissy darlin' to leave, too, when he wanted to sleep in hospital."
More chalk scratchin'.
"Chrissy want Heyes to stay and Jed needs Heyes to stay. Partners don't leave."
Quiet while more chalk scratched his board.
Good!" Chrissy said and I figured it was time to enter the room.
I threw out all of the things I thought I would say to him and let my feelin's show. He, and maybe Chrissy, were the only people in the world I would allow to see them.
I sat on the bed next to him, rested my elbows on my knees and my head in my hands. "Heyes, I am so sad with you right now."
I couldn't see him, but I heard him sigh and write on his chalkboard. His writin' had improved in the last week.
"Sorry still here," he wrote and held it in front of me.
His words were the last straw for me, and I couldn't hold the tears I had been holdin' inside for months from flowing out. I looked him in the eyes. We used to be able to communicate without words. I hoped we still could.
"K…Kid?" I saw in his expression that he was confused. I also saw what I thought was hope.
I put my hand on his knee. "Heyes, how could you ever think I wanted you to leave? It hurts me so deep that you would think that." I couldn't look at him again. "After all I've tried to do for you. Heyes, don't you know we belong together? Partners forever? I thought you needed that as much as I do." My voice got louder. My frustrations were just not aimed at him, they were aimed at me, too.
I stood up abruptly, but my right leg shook with the sudden movement. Heyes was quick to support me. He pushed me back to sit on his bed. He closed the door and came and sat next to me. This time he put his hand on my knee and I could tell he was puzzlin' something out. My emotions were so close to the surface right now that a few more tears left my eyes. Heyes stood up, went to his drawer, and pulled out a clean bandana. I reached for it, but he pulled it back and wiped my tears away like he had done when we were younger. That simple gesture, reminiscent of how much he had taken care of me when we were on our own, brought us back together
K…Kid good?" he asked tentatively.
I raised my head and looked at him. I felt my smile fightin' its way through my gloomy mood.
He reached around his back and found his chalkboard. I had forgotten the frame was broken. "Kid still proddy?" he wrote.
That made me laugh. "Haven't let out my emotions like that in years. Needed to, I guess. But when Lom told me you thought I wanted you to go away, to leave, somehow I just broke. That really hurt deep."
He put his arm around my shoulder and back, and quickly pulled it off. He lifted the back of my new white shirt and studied my back, touchin' the newer, healin' lacerations.
"Thanks," he said, gently puttin' down my shirt. "My fault," he wrote.
"No, Heyes, you did so good. You took the responsibility for what you did. That was such a big step. I told you I was proud of you and I am. What followed was my fault for not followin' the rules. Always had trouble with rules."
I didn't convince him, but he didn't argue, just reached up and rubbed my bald head.
"I know, Chrissy said she missed my curls. I tell you, just havin' my head shaved made me feel like a worthless prisoner, again."
He nodded. I relived my time in prison for him. I needed to talk to someone about it and he saw that.
When I was quiet, he wrote on his board, "Why warden want you dead?"
I looked at him. "At first, I thought that was in my head. Until he sent two men to kill me in the hospital."
He looked at me with alarm. "W…W…What?"
"Yes, we're all good, thanks to the knife of Paul Ortiz and Chrissy havin' your gun in her pocketbook."
"Chrissy's gun. I no touch," he wrote. Then he erased that and wrote, "We figure who try kill Kid. Careful. I watch back."
Lom
I waited until the Kid had been home two days before I said my goodbyes. Juan had things under control with the horses. Chrissy would have coddled the Kid all day and night. He politely refused her nursing except at night and started into chores right away. Heyes tried to trail him and anticipate what the Kid intended to do. The Kid's patience was thin, even with Heyes. I figured he was still recovering mentally and physically from his recent prison experience. I don't think he ever worked things out from his time in Arizona. The mental part was what I worried about with him. He's holding it all inside. I hope he can work it out slowly or it's going to explode out of him.
Chrissy turned her ministrations to Dr. Arden, her good doctor. He wasn't hurt that bad, by outlaw standards. But for a city doctor, two black eyes, a swollen jaw, and a broken arm were traumatic. He welcomed Chrissy fussing over him. The Kid seemed to just want to be left alone and work, work, work. But I needed to find him and talk to him alone before I left. I found him in the blacksmith shop working on his stockpile of horseshoes. I watched as he swung that heavy hammer with precision in the heat from the forge. I knew that movement must have caused pain on his back.
"Kid?" I stood outside the building, but I still felt the intense heat.
He looked up to acknowledge me but returned to the horseshoe he was molding. I watched him, thinking how he never wanted work that was hard on the back. It took tough decisions to get to where he was today, wielding a heavy hammer in the heat.
When he finished the horseshoe, he stretched his back, removed his gloves, and looked at me. "Come to say goodbye, Lom? I can't thank you enough for what you did for Heyes while I was gone." He waved me in the back room and took a long drink of the water there. I could see something close to exhaustion behind his eyes. We had talked about the intruders and his meeting two of the customers and most everything else, dark and light, in the last few days. Most everything, but not everything.
"Working until you drop is not the answer to anything, Kid."
"When I'm workin' hard, I concentrate on what I'm doin'."
I think he meant when he works hard, he doesn't think about how tough life has been for him. Yet, he's sitting here smiling at me. He was genuinely happy to be back with Heyes and here at the home they are building.
"Need to talk to you about something."
"Something about Heyes I need to know?"
"Well come to think of it, yes, but I forget about it in all the confusion. He's obsessed with finding something in the newspapers. Even went into Three Birds just before you got back. Jeff set him up in the office at the mercantile. He had light and privacy and he read the backlog of papers."
"He rode into Three Birds?"
"Not willingly, but there was something he felt he needed in those newspapers. He did spend a long time looking at the burnt building and he touched the burn on Jeff's arm."
"I'll talk with him about it. Tell him I'm proud of him and make sure he's okay." The Kid said the last as much to himself as to me.
"That's not what I came down here to talk to you about."
He looked at me and waited for me to continue with such tired eyes I almost didn't want to tell him, but I needed to.
"Kid, I found the picture in your drawer."
His shoulders went down as his back straightened. He became defensive. "What were you doin' in my drawer? Heyes see it?"
"I was looking for your shirt size so Heyes could order that white shirt. No, Heyes didn't see it. You never told me you knew. You get it from Winter's Refuge?"
I saw the flash of guilt in his eyes and almost fear that was conquered quickly. The Kid had suffered in prison as much as Heyes. I'm sure submission and fear were beaten into him. It takes immense self-control to put that behind him. He has matured. He's not the brash kid he was before.
He looked me straight in the eyes and said, "I stole it when I was there. I saw it by accident."
"You stole it?"
"I did." He was honest and I didn't see any guilt. "But Marina and Jose Ortiz figured it out and understood, even if they didn't forgive. They'll never forgive me for what I did to Chrissy. Hard to reconcile that my biggest regret is also my biggest joy and hope for the future."
I left him to his thoughts for a minute.
"Did you see the other picture? The one in the envelope underneath?" he asked.
"No, just the framed one."
"When Juan came back and Jose came with him, he brought me another, more current picture. I spend hours just lookin' at their pictures."
I knew he was thinking of those children right now. He hung his head for a minute.
"Lom, I was mad at Heyes for a while, but you made me understand what for comfort not passion meant. If I had died, I would have been glad they had each other. I've decided no matter what, those children are mine, me and Chrissy's. They'll be raised as Currys."
His words were determined, but his eyes were begging me to bless his decision.
"They'll be lucky to have you two as parents. Have you talked to her yet?"
"No."
"Then you better hide that picture somewhere else. She just might go in there to get you a shirt."
He nodded. "I been waitin' for her to say something first, but I see it's gotta come from me. Not sure I can handle it right now." The honesty in his voice pulled at my heart.
"You alright? You want me to stay a few more days?"
He showed me that charming smile he's had as long as I've known him, a true smile. "I got this, Lom. Just tell me, they okay? They need anything, anything at all?"
"They're well taken care of for now, but they do need their parents. We'll leave the timing up to Chrissy for now."
I thought our conversation was over, but I could see he was struggling with something. "Lom, I been thinkin' about something the last few days. Do you think you could do something for me?"
"If I can."
"Can you check if the Triumvirate are still wanted dead or alive?"
"The Triumvirate? You mean the first leaders of the Devils' Hole Gang, even before Big Jim was part of the gang?"
"Yeah. I ain't never heard they got amnesty or anything and was wonderin' if you just keep bein' wanted forever? Is that what would have happened to me and Heyes?"
"I do remember posters on them. I'll check when I get to Porterville for you."
