November 2009

Ziva had been thinking a lot since coming home from Somalia. She joined NCIS again but nothing felt like before.

Her relationship with McGee got stronger, but she couldn't stop thinking about Tony's words.

"Couldn't live without you, I guess" he said with a smile, covered in sweat, dried blood and dirt.

She sat down on the sofa inside her office. She had been going to it every single night after work to let her feelings out, to release all the anguish that comes from a case when she can't save everyone, when something happens that she can't shake off.

She looked at her first case: Morgan Burke, a navy officer that was kidnapped while pregnant and never found.

She remembered how she went to the scene only to find out the sheriff's office had the case.

Gibbs never let her forgive it. "She was Navy. And we never hand over one of our own" he said.

Ziva kept thinking about Morgan, how she was probably still held captive somewhere, just like she had been in Somalia. "Gibbs was right, we never leave one of our own" she thought.

She remembered how scared and alone she felt in Somalia and when she thought she couldn't take it anymore, her torturer brought her to the torture chamber and sat her down.

She was trembling, cold and scared, and thought there was no hope anymore: she was going to die.

When the monster lifted the hood, she saw Tony. The look on her face was only slightly more surprised than his.

"You thought I was dead?" she asked him.

"Oh yeah" he said, shaking.

Only then did she realize what being part of a team – part of a Navy team – really meant, what never giving up on one of their own meant. It was like family.

"My heart saw him as if for the first time and I knew I could now live without him" she wrote at the end of the page, closing the notebook.

A gentle knock on the door distracted her from her thoughts. She turned around to see Odette's face peaking behind the door.

"Hi. It's good to see you".

"I didn't mean to interrupt, I just wanted to bring you your mail" said Odette, walking in.

"Thank you. You're always so kind" said Ziva, taking the pile of letters as Odette handed them over to her. "And thank you for letting me receive my personal mail here. I don't want to risk one anyone it".

"You are the one that is kind, always paying rent in advance to help me. Having your personal mail brought here is the least I could do".

"You're an amazing friend" said Ziva smiling.

"Take your time, Ziva. You know you can stay for as long as you need".

"Thank you"

"We thought we had lost you last summer. I'm here if you need anything" she said, gently caressing Ziva's shoulder.

Ziva looked at her lovingly as tears filled up her eyes.

January 2010

Vance called Tony and Ziva in earlier that day, so they got to the office before McGee.

As they were sitting at their desks, talking about their weekend, Gibbs quickly walked in.

"Morning, boss," said Tony.

"Morning, DiNozzo. Director wants us all upstairs. Come on" he said, walking towards the staircase.

Tony and Ziva quickly followed. As they walked inside Vance's office, he got up from his chair.

"Agent DiNozzo and David," said Vance. "I have asked Gibbs to bring you in earlier this morning to discuss your next mission".

"Mission?" asked Ziva.

"Yes, agent David. We need two agents to escort a witness back to Washington. Her name is Nora Williams" said Vance, "and she is the lead witness in a DOD Fraud case".

"Is that all we know?" asked Ziva.

"I am working on getting Nora's case file to find out more. Gibbs and McGee will work here with me in case there is something else we need to investigate" he said, looking at Gibbs. "But, in the meantime, I need you to leave immediately for Paris," said Vance.

"Paris?" asked Tony, laughing.

"Yes, agent DiNozzo. Is there a problem?"

"Not at all! I've always wanted to visit it again. The beautiful streets and cafés…"

"This is not a pleasure trip, DiNozzo" he said sternly. "She will be waiting for you at the US Embassy: you will have to pick her up and come back within 48 hours. The Secretary of the Navy stressed how pivotal this operation is, so act fast. Your flight back to Washington is already booked, don't miss it" he continued. "I count on your, agent David".

"Yes, sir. We will do our best to protect her until she is safe back here in Washington".

"Great" he said. "Now, go home and pack your bags: your flight leaves in three hours".

"That was a nice flight, wasn't it?"

"Yes" answered Ziva as they walked inside the hotel bedroom. There was a small couch and a queen size bed.

"So, what do you want to do about the bed?"

"Oh, don't worry Tony, I'll take the couch," said Ziva, walking towards the window.

"No way, it's too small for you to sleep in it" he said, looking at the couch and sitting down on the bed "… it's too small for a dog to sleep in it. I'll take it: I've slept vertically before…. plus, I'm the Senior Field Agent".

Ziva turned around and laughed. "I know you. Being Senior Field Agent won't stop you from complaining about your back on the plane tomorrow. I'll take the couch".

Tony looked at her and cleared his throat. "We could both sleep on the bed, you know".

Ziva tilted her head, surprised. "Don't worry, I won't bite. Or snore" said Tony as he smiled, stood up and walked outside to call McGee. Ziva turned around and smiled.

February 2013

Ziva was standing in front of her father's white grave as people were leaving the cemetery after the funeral.

She looked like she was staring into space: she wasn't blinking nor crying, but her mind was being swarmed by rapidly flowing thoughts. As people left, she looked up and saw Deena Bashan standing against a tree and looking around.

She seemed like someone who had just picked up the courage to show up at the last minute to pay their tribute, but didn't want to be seen or actually talk to anyone.

As soon as she saw Ziva looking at her, she turned serious.

Ziva hadn't spoken to her in years but she knew Deena was there for a reason and after not seeing each other for so long, she knew she needed to approach her.

"Shalom, Deena" she said, walking towards her.

"Shalom, Ziva".

"Thank you for coming" said Ziva, grateful.

"You're welcome. Your father was always so kind to me, whenever I came to your house, and I never forgot that".

"Yes, he was. I appreciate you saying that… and bringing back such fond memories," said Ziva.

"I'm very sorry for your loss" added Deena.

"Thank you. It's very good to see you" added Ziva, "We haven't seen each other or spoken in so long…"

"I know, it's been a very long time".

"It's good to have someone to remind myself of good times right now," said Ziva.

Deena held her bag closer and looked around as if to check if anyone was nearby.

"Listen, I am sorry you have lost your father, but too much has changed since you've left and I am just… not comfortable talking right now".

Ziva looked surprised. "What happened?" she asked.

"Ziva…"

"Please" added Ziva, visibly worried. Deena looked deep into Ziva's eyes as if she was trying to pick up the courage to start a long and complicated conversation. "One day we'll talk" she said, leaving.

May 2013

Ziva had just been attacked and was terrified of the possibility of being recognized: she was walking to the hospital as quickly as she could, even though she was limping.

She knew that wasn't the closest hospital but it was where Deena Bashan worked: she needed someone to help her without drawing too much attention and she thought someone who knew her would understand.

Ziva had already called to tell her she was coming, so when Deena came out of the hospital door, she wasn't surprised to see her.

"Hi", said Ziva, removing the black and white pashmina that was covering her head. "Thanks for agreeing to see me. I was attacked at my home yesterday".

"Hi" said Deena. "Where are you hurt?"

"They shot me in the leg. I've removed the bullet but I will probably need stitches".

"Come inside".

Ziva and Deena walked inside, down a long, white corridor and into a small room.

It was dimly lit and there were only had a hospital bed and a cart with first aid items.

"I will have a look at the wound to make sure you don't need surgery and then we'll stitch it up".

"Thanks" said Ziva. As Deena started looking at the wound under a bright, operating room-style lamp, she looked at her and started reminiscing. "You know, when I saw you at my father's funeral, it brough back a lot of memories…

Our lives were so much simpler back then, weren't they?"

"Sure" said Deena.

"And more joyful" added Ziva. "I miss that".

"Listen" said Deena, willing to cut her off as quickly as possible. "Can you go back to your house today? Is it safe or could they attack you again?" she asked.

"They might come back, but this time I'll be prepared" said Ziva, resolutely.

"Please, come stay with me. You need a night to recover. I just want you to rest and make sure the wound starts healing properly" she said.

"Ok" said Ziva. She was getting a strange feeling from Deena, like she didn't want to be disagreed with.

Deena helped her climb the stairs and walk down the corridor into her small apartment.

She helped Ziva sit at the table.

"Thank you for this. Now I feel like I owe you," said Ziva.

"Make yourself comfortable. I'll go get you a towel and make your bed for tonight" said Deena, drily.

Ziva looked at her like she couldn't see the friendly girl she had grown up with anymore. "Is there something wrong?" she asked.

"Why do you ask?" asked Deena, worried.

"You said much has changed since I left and that one day we'll have to talk… and you seem… upset about something".

"Don't you know why?" asked Deena with a serious look on her face.

"I really don't" said Ziva honestly.

Deena sighed. She sat down at the table and looked at Ziva, who was sitting at on the sofa. The space between them was palpable.

"Listen, I have grown up with you, Ari and Tali and because of that I had always thought I knew you. Your family looked great – not perfect, but you three were always together, playing and laughing and your mother was always home, making us snacks and watching over us. I envied that" she admitted. "My parents were busy working doctors and I was an only child. That's why I have always wanted a family like yours. But as we grew, I realised what kind of job your father had. After Tali's death, something changed inside all of you, so much so that when you and Ari decided to follow in his footsteps" she continued. "I got scared. Scared that I would lose my friends, who I saw were just blinded by suffering and a thirst for revenge. But…" she continued, as Ziva's eyes started getting teary. "Never would have I thought it would all turn into a bloodbath" she said, angrily.

"Our job is dangerous," said Ziva.

"That's not it!" yelled Deena.

Ziva looked at her in a way she had never before: she was almost scared. "To this day, I still can't believe you never realized your brother and I fell in love around the time when you both joined Mossad".

Ziva was suddenly taken aback: she never knew this.

"I've always loved his smile" she said, crying. "When we grew up and started sharing an interest in Medicine, we grew much closer. We got together by the time we graduated med school. He was going to propose to me and thenhe went on a mission in the US", she continued. "The last I heard of him was right before you went on the same mission" she continued, her voice raising more and more. "Which I later found out led to his killing!"

Ziva was in shock. She had no idea Deena knew all this.

"Deena, I am so sorry, I didn't know any of this. Please let me explain…" she said.

"I don't need you to explain. You killed your own brother!" said Deena, quickly and angrily standing up.

Ziva's jaw dropped: she never would have expected such a blunt delivery from someone like Deena. She had never seen her that distraught in her life.

"I…" said Ziva, trying to find the right words. "In a way, I had to. He came to the US to harm innocent people, Deena. I'm sorry, but I don't think you understand…"

"I do understand! You think he was just hurting other people but you don't realize he was also hurt. He joined Mossad so his father would be proud but he never was. And as time went on, his gentle spirit disappeared. All that was left were anger and sadness".

Ziva felt deeply ashamed: she had never looked at it that way.

"Your father broke you both and for that I am sorry, but I can't let you try and heal the wound you have caused me. I'm sorry, but you are on your own" she said, standing up to leave.

"Deena, please, I am begging you…" said Ziva "please... forgive me".

Denna looked her straight in the eyes. "I can't" she said. "But at least we've all moved on now. You have mentioned your new colleagues in the eulogy, the ones at NCIS. If that's where you belong, reach out to them, I'm sure they'll be able to bring you the closure you need. I can't" she said as she closed the door behind herself.

"You think he was just hurting other people but you don't realize he was also hurt. Your father broke you both"

As these words were echoing in her head, Ziva sat back down, in shock.

She felt exposed, hurt, but also deeply shaken by what felt like a revelation but was in fact a truth that had always been in front of her and that she never had the guts to see.

Now she felt it was finally time to face it.

October 2013

Ziva walked inside and sat at the large table in the dining room, looking serious; she looked down at the old piece of crimpled, okra paper on the table, picked it up and started reading it to herself. Tony came in through the door, walked towards the table and sat at her right. She raised her eyes to meet his gaze.

"So, what are you thinking?"

"I have to do this, Tony" she said with a serious tone "I have to do this, on my own".

"I know" he replied with a smile. "So, what do you think you're going to write first?"

"I don't know" she said, looking back at the piece of paper she had written as a kid. She turned it around and looked at the blank space on the back. She took a breath and pondered.

"I just know that everything that happened… Ari… that world… that was my father's world. I don't want to be in it, not anymore".

"So, what are you going to do?" he asked.

"I will… leave it behind me, move on, start something new" she said finally.

"Are you going to… let it all go?"

"Yes, I have to" she replied sternly, with tears in her eyes. "Deena is not going to forgive me for what I've done and I don't want to be that person anymore".

"I understand" he replied. His look had a vein of sadness as he bit his lip, trying to stop himself from saying something. "So, I'm guessing you are not coming back to NCIS…"

"I can't, Tony" she yelled. "If I want to let go of that life, I have to let go of the badge".

"I can't imagine you doing anything other than catching bad guys" he said jokingly.

She looked at him and smiled. "I don't know what I'll do. I know I want to start fresh, from here. This is where it all started and… where I need to be to make things right".

"You need to let that go, Ziva".

"I know, I know… I just…I want to make amends. And I think by doing this I'll have the chance to do just that".

"I hope you will".

Flashback

Ziva raised her hands and held his cheeks in between them. She leaned in slowly. The sunbeams gently caressed her curly hair as she stroked her nose against his.

"I'm fighting for you, Ziva" he whispered.

"I know" she said, their noses brushing up against each other slightly.

She closed her eyes and they kissed. They dove into each other, her hands still caressing his cheeks and his hands tight on her waist. Then the kiss intensified, he held her tighter against him and then their lips slowly unlocked.

They looked into each other's eyes as if everything had just changed.

End of flashback

The next morning the sun came beaming through the big window, waking Ziva up.

She rolled over to his side. He lifted his eyes and looked at her with a smile.

"Morning" she said. Her severe, serious look was gone as she was smiling and cuddling the duvet.

The self-blaming Ziva of the day before was gone and she was radiating a sense of peace.

"Morning" he replied, looking at her in the most loving way.

"Tony…" she started, with some seriousness back in her voice. But she didn't get the chance to say what she wanted to as he leaned in and kissed her. They hugged tightly and their naked bodies merged under the covers.

Sunrays streamed in through the glass window as Ziva moved her head on the pillow and slowly woke up.

She sat up on the bed and looked back at Tony, laying behind her.

She looked at her nightstand and saw her Star of David necklace.

As she looked at it now, she remembered the second item on her new list: letting go of the past.

She looked back at Tony with a serious look on her face, pondering all the mixed feelings she was having: she felt guilty, sad and as though all the promises she had made to herself were wavering. She got up, held the necklace in her hands and caressed it. She walked over to Tony's side and gently made the necklace slip into the pocket of his shirt that was laying on a chair. She looked at him one last time: he was still fast asleep and didn't know she had just made her decision.

When Tony woke up and lifted his head up to see if Ziva was in the room, he immediately noticed her necklace was gone from the nightstand.

He joined her in the living room, where she was sitting on the same old, brown sofa they had sat together on the day before. "Morning. What happened to your necklace?" he asked.

She looked at him with a serious look and Tony immediately knew the night they had just spent together was probably going to be their last.

"I'm guessing you made up your mind" he said, turning serious himself. "Your face says it all".

"Tony, I have to do this" she said, looking him straight into the eyes. Her voice was wavering, but she seemed resolute.

"I know" he continued, calmly. "And I know I can't expect last night to change your mind".

Tony was visibly hurt, even though he was masking his words with a smile.

Ziva knew what had just happened between them was going to make it even harder for both of them.

She had made a promise to herself, but she was struggling: for the first time in her life, someone was making her question her choices.

"I didn't want to get your hopes up" she said, almost feeling guilty.

Tony looked flattered as he sat down next to her. "Don't worry about it" he sighed, "It never works out between agents anyway" he added.

In that moment, he knew he had never wanted to be with anyone, anywhere, more than he wanted to be with her.

Ziva was staring at him, not knowing what to do or say. He leaned in, held her head in his hands and kissed her on the forehead, feeling that was probably going to be the last time he ever could.

November 2013

Ziva sat in the bathroom, her trembling hands. Ziva knew what was going on but she didn't want to face it.

She knew she was pregnant. She thought she should be happy, but a deep shade of worry came over her.

How could she bring a child into the world and be a good mother after everything she had gone through? Could she ever let all of that go and try and build a peaceful home for her baby? Her past weighted on her like a heavy burden, but she remembered Tony's words and the promise she had made to herself.

This was her chance to start over. This was her chance to let go of that life for good, once and for all.

She needed a push, a reason strong enough to allow her to move forward without looking back.

Tony supported her in her new beginning, but Ziva never would have thought he'd be the one to thank.

He had just given her the most powerful way out she could have possibly imagined. She immediately felt a strength she didn't know she had: she knew that child was going to be her reason, her most important reason.

She picked up the phone and stared at it for a few seconds, then dialled the number she hadn't had the courage to dial for two weeks.

"Hey, Ziver" said someone on the other end, with a faint voice.

"Gibbs…" she whispered, her voice starting to quiver.

"Yeah. So… what's up?"

"I… I am not coming back Gibbs. I have to start over and I need to do it on my own, here. I just wanted to call you to tell you that".

"You do what you gotta do" replied Gibbs.

"Yeah, and I wanted to, you know… thank you"

"You don't have to thank me, Ziver" he replied kindly.

"And I'm sorry…"

"Don't worry about it. If you're sure about this, it's all good" he said calmly.

A smile appeared on her face beneath the tears.

December 2013

"Aunt Nettie!" said Ziva as she opened her door.

"My Ziva! How are you?" she asked impatiently.

"I'm well..." said Ziva, a bit doubtful.

"As soon as I heard you quit being an agent, I knew I needed to come and see you. I love that you're back in Tel Aviv, but you're the first to leave the agency in our family, so I wanted to know the reason. There is a reason, isn't there?"

"You're not wrong. Many things have changed recently. Why don't we sit down?" she said, pointing at the table.

"After dad died, I felt the needed to come back to these places, see you and old friends again… And that's when I realised everything being an agent made me miss out".

"Oh, come on Ziva, being an agent has always been your heart and soul. I can't imagine you being tired of it already. What are you going to do?"

Ziva paused, cracking a smile as if she was scared of what she was going to say next.

"Aunt Nettie, I have to tell you something" she began, "I'm pregnant".

"What?" said her aunt, getting up so quickly the chair almost fell backwards.

"Ziva, are you sure?" she said, leaning down towards her niece. "Are you really going to be a mother?"

"Yes" she answered, a little shaky.

"Well, that is a job that would make any agent retire for good, even the most passionate" she said, finally. She had to calm down and collect her thoughts before she could say:

"We have to celebrate! Let me go unpack and then I'll take you out to dinner. I can't imagine how happy your mother and father would have been!"

Ziva was happy but also visibly worried. Her aunt picked up on that and immediately leaned towards her, held her face between her hands and said: "This baby is going to be a blessing, Ziva and time will show you just how much. You'll see" she said as she kissed her forehead.

January 2014

Ziva knocked on the dark wooden door and the door quickly opened. A woman with dark hair looked at her with the most loving smile.

"It's good to see you, Ziva," said Orli.

"I've heard you were looking for me. So, what brings me here?" asked Ziva as she walked into the house. It looked like her farmhouse, except the furnishings looked more refined. The clean windows offered a beautiful view on a beautifully groomed garden. As she looked around, Orli kept talking behind her.

"We were looking for you. All Mossad was looking. When the NCIS director called and told us about your resignation, I couldn't believe it" she said.

"I had my reasons" said Ziva, resolutely.

"I'm sure you did. Why don't you sit down?" she said, showing Ziva a big round table with wooden chairs. surrounding it. Ziva sat down and Orli did the same.

"Ziva, Adam told me your news" she said calmly.

Ziva gasped, looking like she didn't want Orli to bring up the subject.

"You're pregnant?" asked Orli, almost tearing up.

"Adam told you?!" asked Ziva angrily.

"He did, but don't worry, he hasn't told anyone else" said Orli gently.

"He shouldn't have told you either. He wasn't supposed to tell this to anyone. I'm never going to trust him again" she said, getting up to leave. Her belly was small, but you could already tell she was pregnant.

"It's my fault" started explaining Orli, inviting her to sit down again. Ziva sat back down, looking away.

"I found out Adam came to see you and I wanted to know how you were. We got to talking and I forced it out of him. When I found out, I wanted to see you".

"Why?"

"I want to help you, Ziva".

"Thank you, but I don't need help" she answered, quickly.

"Ziva… I know that we have never managed to get along all that well, but I'm going to be honest with you: you're all the family I've got left, in a way," said Orli.

"You have your daughters. You have quite the family actually" Ziva pointed out.

Orli sighed. "I meant you are the only other part of Eli's family I have left. And I just wanted to let you know I'm here for you…"

Ziva was still angry with her, but also surprised: Orli had never called her "family" or anything of that nature.

She looked right into her eyes and could see a sparkle of sadness that was never there when her father was alive.

It seemed grief had changed her.

"I know you want to make amends and I commend you for that, but this isn't the time" she said. "Thank you for looking for me, though" she said in a caring and deeply grateful tone.

"Was Tony the one who told you I was?" asked Orli perceptively.

Ziva frowned as if puzzled. "How did you know?"

"When NCIS told me about your decision to leave, I understood Tony had been one to find you" said Orli, almost in the form of a question. "Which seemed so weird to me, given how hard it is to find you when you don't want to be found…"

Ziva smiled and looked down at her hands. "Tony has his ways" she said with a smile. "He's a good agent".

"An agent so good to find you before anyone else, with two agencies looking?"

"He put some pieces together and figured it out" Ziva replied quickly.

"Well…" said Orli standing up "Sounds to me like he knows you better than any of us" she said with a big smile.

Orli paused for a minute, almost like she was trying to find the courage to change the subject:

"I know that you're pregnant, but none of us seem to know who the father it" she said.

Ziva looked straight into her eyes. "Adam is not the father, if that's the question" she said sternly.

"I didn't ask that. What I wonder is where the father is, whoever he is" asked Orli in a tactful manner.

"He's not… going to be a part of this" answered Ziva.

"Is this because he doesn't want to be involved or because he doesn't know?" asked Orli perceptively, like she already knew the answer. Ziva was speechless: she felt as though Orli had seen right through her and felt so guilty.

"Ziva… whoever this man is, he needs to know," said Orli.

Ziva stood up to leave. "I will decide if and when he should know this".

"Is he someone you don't want in your baby's life?" asked Orli, worried.

"No…" said Ziva, visibly upset. "I just want to figure this out on my own before telling him. It's a huge responsibility" she added, caressing her belly, "I have barely come to terms with it myself".

"That's why I said I am here if you need anything: pregnancy is such a delicate time for a woman. It's scary, I know. Please, reach out if you ever need help," said Orli.

"I will," said Ziva. "Thank you".

Orli walked her to the door and greeted her goodbye. Ziva was adamant not to ever call her again but there was something about her demeanour that had changed. Ziva felt it but she couldn't tell what it was. It was almost like… tenderness.

May 2014

"Orli, it's so good to see you. Shalom" said Ziva as she opened the door and welcomed her with joy and surprise.

They had been seeing each other several times since Orli offered her help with the baby.

You could tell they had mended their relationship over the years as Ziva's voice and manners were gentler towards her, even though Ziva didn't feel like fully trusting her yet.

"It's been a while since I've visited and I wanted to come before the little one arrives to make sure you have everything you need" she added, walking through the door.

"That's so sweet, thank you" added Ziva. As they both walked inside, Orli noticed the crib and pram were still wrapped

up in two different boxes parked in the room next to the living space.

She looked at Ziva with a stern look, waiting for an explanation.

"I need to set them up, I know" she said, passing her fingers through her hair. "I've just been a little busy".

"Ziva, what could be more important right now than getting ready for the baby?" she said gently.

"Nothing…" added Ziva, looking away and almost trying to change the subject.

Orli noticed that. "Is there anything bothering you right now?"

Ziva looked at her. "No" she said, "But could you do something for me?" asked Ziva.

"Anything, my dear" added Orli.

Ziva sighed. "When I decided to leave NCIS and stay here, part of me fought that decision and for a moment. I almost thought about going back. I just felt like I should, after everything Gibbs and the team had done for me. I felt I owed them. But then I found out I was pregnant and my priorities shifted. From that moment on I never looked back and I was glad I had quit. It wasn't easy, but I don't regret it. The only thing is that lately I have had this feeling…" she said, looking down at her hands. "Almost like guilt".

"Guilt for what?"

"I guess for not being there, never checking out on them… If something happened to them, I wouldn't even know".

"Ziva, right now you're focusing on this new, precious life that is growing inside of you and that soon will be here". added Orli. "I'm sure none of your NCIS colleagues need you as much as this baby. You'll reach out when you can".

"I know, but I feel so bad not knowing what might be going on with them. I can't help but wonder".

"Ziva, your baby needs you right now. And even if they needed you, how could you possibly help them from here?" continued Orli. "Your position at Mossad is always open, if you ever want to come back: that could be the perfect way to reach out to them again".

"I'm not sure I want to go back. Could you just keep an eye on all of them for me, please?" she asked, pleading.

"Sure" said Orli.

A knock on the door made them both turn their heads and aunt Nettie walked inside with a few gifts for the baby.

"Ziva, your aunt is here! I've brought some things for the little one! Oh…" she said, as she saw Ziva and Orli on the couch.

"It's ok, Orli was just leaving" she said. "Orli, this is my aunt Nettie. You probably remember each other" said Ziva

"I sure do remember" said Nettie, glaring at Orli.

"My aunt is here to help me prepare everything for the baby. She'll stay until after the birth" explained Ziva.

"We'll talk soon" she said as she stood up and saw Orli out. Ziva closed the door behind herself and walked up to her aunt, who was emptying grocery bags.

"Auntie…"

"I am not going to ask you what she was doing here" Nettie cut her off. "We have lots to do before the baby gets here and very little time. Look, you didn't even unbox the crib while I was gone!" she said, pointing at the boxes in the hallway.

"Thanks for being here" said Ziva, grateful.

"You're welcome, honey".

"Ziva, where would you like to me to put this?" asked her aunt, showing her a crib mobile. "Ziva?"

Ziva was sitting on the couch, thinking and didn't seem to be listening to her.

"Everything alright?" asked her aunt again.

"Yes… yes, sorry" she said, turning around and getting up from the couch. She was struggling to get up from the couch, bed and chairs as her due date was approaching.

"I just need to know where this goes" she asked, calmly.

"You can hang it over her crib, it's fine," said Ziva.

"Is something bothering you?" asked her aunt.

"No… I'm just worried about the birth, I guess".

Her aunt looked down at the mobile and hesitated. "You know, maybe having more help around would ease your mind".

Ziva looked puzzled. "I already have all the help I need. You're all I need right now".

"I wasn't talking about help around the house. I was talking about… someone to talk to".

"I don't have a mother to talk to" said Ziva, sorrowfully. "That's who I would need to turn to the most right now. But I have you".

"Thank you, I'm glad I can be of help, but I was thinking about a person a baby would need even more… their father," said Nettie.

Ziva was taken aback. Her aunt had never asked her who the father was before.

"He can't be here because he doesn't know" said Ziva finally.

"Is it because he doesn't want to be in the baby's life?"

"No…" said Ziva, pensive.

"Is it because you don't want him in this baby's life?" asked her aunt.

Ziva got visibly upset. "Not at all" she said. "It's just not the time to tell him. Not yet".

"Ziva, the baby is almost here. This is the time to tell him, whoever he is".

"It's just… I don't know how he could react. Having a child can really turn a person's life upside down. I just need time to adjust to this myself".

"Ok, but his life will change anyway, sooner or later. I believe it's best to do it sooner," said Nettie. She looked at Ziva, opened her mouth as if to ask something she was unsure about. "Could I at least ask who it is?" she said finally.

Ziva thought about it. Adam had already guessed who it was months before and Orli knew as well.

Her aunt was family and she trusted her enough to spill it.

"It's Tony" she said, her voice wavering.

"Tony…" repeated her aunt, thinking. "Wasn't he the one who picked up the phone while we were talking a few years ago? I think he said he was your husband" she asked laughing.

Ziva laughed. "He has always been quite the jokester."

"I do like an agent with a sense of humour. It seems like he cared for your already, even back then".

"In a way, maybe he did," said Ziva, cradling her belly.

July 2014

"I came as soon as I could" said Orli as she walked into the hospital, almost panting.

"I was just there, they said she could be here any minute" said Adam, both anxious and excited.

A doctor walked towards them with a smile on their face. "She's here, it's a girl" she said, as they were sighing with relief.

"That's wonderful. Thank you, doctor," said Orli. "Can we go see them?"

"Just give them a little more time to make sure everything is alright and then you'll be able to go in" she said smiling. Then she walked away.

"That's such great news, I was so worried," said Orli.

"I know," said Adam. "Ziva has been worried for the entire pregnancy".

"And I fear she won't stop worrying anytime soon. But I hope that for now she can just enjoy this moment".

"Here you are. Has the baby been born yet?" said Nava as she walked in.

"Yes, we are just waiting to go in," said Orli.

"You may go in now" said what seemed to be a nurse who had just come out of Ziva's room.

The three walked into a small room. Ziva was sitting on the bed wearing a white gown and holding her baby.

She was visibly tired but also calm as she was gently rocking her newborn and smiling at her.

The little girl had brown hair and was fast asleep in her mother's arms.

"She's perfect, Ziva," said Orli.

"She is so beautiful, congratulations," said Nava.

"How are you?" added Adam.

"I'm tired, but it all went well and that's all that matters" Ziva replied.

"What's her name" asked Orli.

"I think you may know the answer," said Ziva.

Orli hesitated, smiling. She walked closer. "Hi, Tali" she said, gently caressing the newborn's head.

As she cradled her newborn daughter, whispering a sweet lullaby, she felt a presence in the room.

She lifted her face up and noticed a short old man standing by the door. He was wearing a smart suit, big glasses with rounded edges and a dark string passing behind his head. He was holding some flowers in one hand and his hat on the other. "Schmiel?" she asked, with a tone of surprise. A smile spread beneath his white moustache and he started walking towards her bed.

"Ah, my Ziva" he replied with his calm voice, before kissing her on the forehead. "And who do we have here?"

"This… is Tali" said Ziva, lifting her head up to meet his kind eyes. Tali held a firm grip on his old, wrinkly index.

"Well," he added, looking at the baby. "She looks just like her, my dear".

Ziva's eyes got teary and a hint of sadness took over her.

"How did you know I was here?" she asked as he sat back on the armchair next to her bed.

"When I rang you at home three days ago, Adam picked up and told me to talk to Orli saying there was some big news. I knew it could only be one thing. Look at you Ziva, being a mother. Your father would have been so happy"

"Oh, yes, he would have been that." She looked back at her daughter. "He talked about it, before he died. He said he was thinking of retiring and grandchildren. It's like he knew…" she added, giggling, "he knew it'd be a granddaughter. He was seeking peace with Kazmi, but that didn't end well either… for anyone" she continued, turning serious. "Everywhere my father went, there went trouble."

"That's in the past, my dear. Let's focus on the life you're holding now. Many have lost their life so that there could be peace for you two now. You'll see how different your life will be now: how full, how beautiful.

This is your chance, Ziva. You'll see".

"I never thought it'd get a happy ending" she admitted honestly.

"But you do" he said, smiling. "I was expecting to see someone else here with you, to be honest" he said humbly.

Ziva turned serious and she looked away. "It's complicated" she said, after a brief pause.

"A mother has eyes of glass" he quoted "You will do what's best for her, Ziva, I'm sure of it".

"Thank you, Schmiel. For everything. These are beautiful" she said, smelling the flowers.

"You're welcome, my dear. Well," he added, while slowly rising from the armchair "it's time for me to go now. I have a plane to catch. Besides, it looks like you're both in good hands, with Adam and Orli."

"Schmiel…" she called him.

"It will all be alright, my dear. We'll see each other soon" he said, as he put his hat on, kissed Ziva on the cheek and slowly disappeared into the hospital corridor.

July 2015

Ziva was making dinner on the kitchen countertop when Tali started wandering off.

She was such a joyful and playful little girl and Ziva couldn't believe she was one already!

She was already walking, although it was still more of a waddle, and had just started babbling. As she walked round the corner moving her hands and talking to herself in her fun little way, Ziva laughed.

"Where are you going?" she said smiling, following her into the big and airy dining room.

All you could see was Tali wobbling around and her squeaks and babble echoing in the silence.

Ziva felt a sudden, brief feeling of deep loneliness as she realised that, after all, it was just the two of them.

"Come back here" she said, following her. Tali had reached a shelf and was trying to reach something on top.

"What are you trying to get to, uh?" she said as she walked towards her.

"Do you want to see the Paris picture again?" she asked. "What is it with you and old, black and white photos, uh?"

Ziva grabbed the framed picture: it was sitting next to an old picture of Ziva and Ari and a picture of Ziva's family.

She briefly glanced at her sister Tali and her mother in the other frame, then knelt down with her daughter to look at the one she was holding.

"Here it is. Who is this?" she said, pointing at herself. "Is it Ima?" Tali tried to repeat what her mother had just said, but only managed to say a mere "Ma". "And who is this?" continued Ziva, pointing at Tony.

He was smirking at the frame, wearing a dark coat and sunglasses. "Abba" said Ziva, articulating the word out carefully, like she was trying to teach her to talk properly.

Tali pointed at him, babbled a few syllables and then blew some bubbles with her mouth.

Ziva smiled "You always make me laugh, my love" she said as she gently moved her daughter's hair away from her face. "Just like he used to" said Ziva, reminiscing. "Mommy and daddy bickered every day, but we sure did love each other" she said, as Tali turned around and caressed her on the cheek. It's like she knew what her mother needed in that moment.

"And I promise you will meet him someday" said Ziva, hugging her daughter close.

March 2016

Tali run up to the counter and touched the end of a necklace hanging down on a jewelry stand.

Ziva run after her to stop her from pulling it all down.

"That's beautiful Tali, but we are not here to buy a necklace right now" said Ziva, smiling.

Tali pointed at it "Ima!" she yelled.

Ziva laughed "All right, I'll get it, but this is the last gift you'll get until your birthday, young lady!"

Ziva took the necklace off the stand and paid for it at the counter while the clerk waved at Tali.

"Ok, here it is" she said kneeling down at her daughter to show it to her.

Tali held it in her little fingers and smiled. Ziva took it from her arms gently and went to put it on her, but Tali fought her and said "Ima!", pointing at her mother's neck.

Ziva caressed her check. "Do you want me to wear it?" she said, pointing at her own chest.

Tali smiled. Ziva took the necklace, put it on herself and took Tali in her arms, leaving the shop while holding her, with a new symbol of love and hope hanging down on her neck.

May 2016

"Ziva" yelled out Adam as soon as he saw her come in. The sun was shining through the big glass windows at Mossad headquarters. Ziva was holding her daughter and carrying a small bag.

"I came as soon as I could" she replied sternly.

"We need to talk, it's important" he said, caressing her shoulder.

"Who can I leave Tali with while we talk?"

"This agent will take care of her" he said, showing her a young agent with dark hair pulled up in an updo. Ziva looked her up and down, trying to tell whether she could be trusted. Then she handed Tali over to her and the young agent broke a smile. Tali smiled back and Ziva felt relieved.

"This way, Orli is waiting in the meeting room" he said, allowing her to lead to way to the room at the end of the hallway.

"Ziva, it's wonderful to see you" Orli said gently as they came through the door.

"It's good to see you too" said Ziva, with genuine kindness.

"Why am I here?" she asked, going back to a more severe, worried tone.

"Come here, have a seat," said Orli. After Ziva had sat down, she started talking again: "Remember when you asked me to look at your father's old files and make sure there were no open cases or…"

"Or any unresolved situation that might lead someone from my father's past to haunt us" Ziva continued. "That was over two years ago. I was pregnant with Tali and I wanted to make sure no one from my past would come looking for us, so I brought you all the case files I had found at the farmhouse".

"Exactly" continued Orli. "Well, I have found a file that struck our attention. A file regarding Jacob Scott, a former MI6 agent, convicted in 2002 for selling nuclear information to the Russians. His wife, Nika Razin, was killed during a joint operation between the NCIS and MI6 in Turkey, Juniper Strike. She was thought to be the one buying information from him. But this file… this file proves he was innocent and therefore possibly her as well."

"I have heard of this case before, but why would you think this could be relevant right now?"

"Scott has been in prison all this time, but has recently escaped. We figured the first place he'd go would be here,

since this is a very strong piece of information that could release him for good."

Orli looked at Adam and Nava, then proceeded to talk slowly:

"If Scott isn't guilty, his escape must have opened a Pandora's box".

"Whoever is truly behind this will want to find Scott before he finds proof that he is innocent" added Adam.

"And won't stop until he destroys the file" concluded Ziva.

"That's why we wanted to warn you as soon as possible. Scott might lead them to the farmhouse where you and Tali are staying," said Orli.

"I know" Ziva replied quickly "you are afraid they will hunt me down, if they think I must have read it" added Ziva. "We need to find who sells the information to the Russians before they find us".

Orli looked at her with a grave look, as if something else was looming upon them.

"We also need to protect you both. You cannot go home, Ziva. See, there is something else you should know."

Ziva looked worried.

"You asked us to look into every file to find any unresolved cases and I think we might have found something, something beyond Scott's case".

Ziva sighed.

"Your father, your brother and many other agents here at Mossad have operated as moles inside Hamas terrorist groups. In particular" continued Orli, "around a months ago, someone who is believed to have been part of several groups in the area where many agents have operated during your father's mandate has recently escaped from a Syrian POW camp. According to several Mossad sources, we know she is a woman who has been part of several militant organizations," said Orli.

"And who seems to have been the leader of many of them" added Adam. "Her name is Sahar. Our informants have told us that she has escaped looking for an ex-Mossad agent to seek revenge and we fear it might be you".

"Why me?"

"We don't know," said Adam. "But it can't be good".

"We fear it might have something to do with Eli. Considering the fact that he conducted many missions involving the dismantling of Hamas terrorist groups, maybe one of those missions led to her capture, the death of her proselytes or the freeze of her assets".

"And now, after his death, she has escaped to find and torture his closest family member" added Ziva.

"That's what we fear. We don't know much about her…," said Orli.

Ziva looked at Orli both scared and furious. "Not even what she looks like?"

"Not really, other than the fact that she has straight dark hair," said Adam.

"Exactly, that's why you and Tali are in grave danger. We believe it's best you stay hidden until we find out more about these threats" said Orli finally. "In the meantime, a few agents will take you to a safe house".

Orli and Adam stood to escort Ziva out, but she didn't move.

Ziva was still sitting, silent and deep in her thoughts, with her hands in front of her.

"No" she replied, looking up at both of them. "There is something else we could do".

"What do you mean?" asked Orli.

Ziva stood up, walked to the mirror on the wall and leaned on it, thinking.

"There is a better way to make sure Tali is safe" she said, sighing "We can use one threat as leverage for the other".

Orli and Adam looked at each other both puzzled and somewhat scared of what Ziva might be about to say.

"I can stay at the farmhouse until those who might be looking for Scott's files show up," she said. "I will fake my own death, pretending I died during a confrontation with them" she said. Then she sighed as if she was weighing every painful word she was about to say "Then I'll go deep undercover. This will buy me some time to find more information on this woman".

"That is quite the plan," said Adam.

"Ziva, are you sure it'll work?" asked Orli.

"It has to" Ziva continued. "We don't know anything about this Sahar, not even if she is actually after me. But I can't risk it, I have to do this to protect Tali. It is the only way" she continued, trying to hold back the tears.

"Do you think this might work, Adam?" asked Orli impatiently.

"I think so".

"And where will Tali stay once you go undercover?" asked Orli worried.

"I don't know" Ziva continued, her voice breaking. "But I would need to leave and I don't know for how long…. and Tali will not be able to come with me If I do…" she continued, sitting back down. Her voice was about to break. "So much has been taken away from me. I don't want this to end as well".

"I know you're worried about losing her, but you won't" Orli reassured her, placing a hand on her leg. "We will find someone we can trust to leave her to. Who would be best, Ziva?"

Ziva was pondering the situation and the implications. "It has to be someone who knows about my family's pictures…" she said.

"Your family's pictures?" asked Adam.

"Yes, my insurance policy" continued Ziva. She seemed steadfast, sure that whatever plan she had just hatched could actually work.

"Your insurance policy?" asked Orli.

"Yes, my only way out" she said worryingly, suddenly realising what she might have to do. "Tony knows about it… but he can't know about Tali like this."

"What do you mean?" asked Orli.

Ziva looked almost guilty for what she was about to confess.

"Tony… is Tali's father" she said finally.

Orli looked shocked and fell on the chair.

"He is the only biological possibility".

Orli pondered her question well before saying: "Why doesn't he know about Tali yet?"

"It's complicated," said Ziva. "When I found out about the baby, I had already decided to quit being an agent, so I knew it was not going to be a problem for me, but telling another agent they are going to be a parent… this will disrupt his life".

"Hasn't he got the right to know?" asked Orli. Ziva was visibly struggling, almost… anxious.

"I guess… but not like this," said Ziva.

"This is the perfect time to tell him, my dear" said Orli with a sweet voice.

"He won't understand, he'll have questions… I can't just drop Tali on his doorstep without a reason, an explanation…" Ziva argued back, "I've distanced myself too much from him, I haven't told him anything of the last three years… he won't be pleased" said Ziva, shaking her head, terrified.

"Ziva, you won't have to do this alone" said Orli "We will help".

"And Tony will understand," said Adam.

Ziva looked defeated: of all the ways she had imagined Tali and Tony would meet, never in a million years would she have picked this, but she felt like she had no choice.

"Now, go and be with your daughter in the other room. I need to talk to Adam about this".

"Orli… I can't…" started saying Ziva.

"Yes, you can. You're a mother. You're stronger than you think" Orli replied, holding her face between her hands. Ziva burst into tears and sobs started racking her whole body.

As Ziva walked back inside her home, her lips were quivering and her legs shaking. She couldn't believe that was probably the last time she would ever walk inside her childhood home, smell those smells…

At the same time, the thing that frightened her the most was that she wasn't ready to let go of her daughter…

She was standing in front of the mantelpiece, frozen, as Adam walked inside carrying Tali.

He immediately noticed what was going on.

"Ziva" he said, putting Tali down and looking straight into her eyes, "I know this seems impossible, but you'll find the strength to do it. You're the one who said this would be the best way to protect Tali, remember?"

"I will" said Ziva, "but no matter how good my motives are, it won't make this any this easier".

"I know," said Adam. "I'll go back to headquarters now. I'll wait for you at our meeting spot".

"Yes, we'll see each other then," said Ziva, sniffing a bit.

"Ziva, I can't promise you anything but I can tell you this: Tali will be safe. I will make sure she boards the plane with Orli safely".

"Thank you".

"I'll leave you to this now. Take your time" he said, stroking her arm before walking out the door, leaving her with her daughter.

The sunbeams were filtering through the window and she noticed how big the house felt, now that she had to leave it. She didn't know where to start. She knew she needed to gather as much as she possibly could, but she didn't know where to begin to pack her whole life… and Tali's.

She looked down at her daughter, who looked back up at her, holding out Kalev towards her.

That's when Ziva realized that's all they were going to need: each other.

She quickly went through the different rooms, packing a duffel bag with comfortable clothing and gear for herself and a bag with Tali's favourite clothes, toys and… Suddenly her eyes landed on the picture she had shown so many times… it was Ima and Abba, the two people in the world Ziva knew would keep her safe.

She remembered their time in Paris six years before, the first time they shared a bed during a mission and confessed things they had never before to each other… she knew that was going to be the way to show him the way…

She took the frame, removed the back and wrote a coded message on the white space on the back of the picture.

She then stuffed it in the side of Tali's bag.

A few other frames were lined up together with her picture with Tony on that small table in her living room: a picture of herself with Ari, one of herself, Ari and Tali together and a picture of her family.

She took the latter and put it in her bag. Then she knelt down and looked at her daughter.

Their dark brown eyes met and, for a moment, Ziva was speechless. She couldn't find the words or pick up the courage to say goodbye. Her daughter was her whole life: how could she survive without her?

"Tali, I love you. I love you so much and I will fight this for you, for us" she said. "You're going to be with Abba now" she continued, tearing up and cracking a smile. "He will take care of you while I go fight our greatest fight. You'll be in my thoughts everyday and I hope I'll be in yours. I long for the day we will get to see each other again" she said, hugging her daughter tight in a painful embrace.

July 2016

Tony left on a night flight with Tali that night. He looked at his daughter, sleeping with Kalev wrapped in her embrace. He gently lifted a blanket over her, sat back on his seat and looked out of the plane window, staring into the night sky. He crossed his arms, leaned back and fell asleep.

The plane landed a few hours later. Tony was standing in front of a trolley at baggage claim and Tali was sitting on a chair playing with Kalev, when a voice echoed in the lobby, amongst the crowd.

"Junior!"

"Dad!" Tony replied, while turning around to see his father walking through the crowd towards them.

"You're here early. We still need to get our bags".

"Oh Junior, you can't carry them all by yourself. Where's my girl?" he asked, looking down at the stroller. Tali looked up at him with a curious smile on her face.

"There she is! Look what grandpa got you" he said, offering her a present. Her arms reached out and Senior knelt down to caress her with the biggest smile on his face.

"Dad, I told you, no gifts," said Tony.

"Come on Junior, it's just a little something".

"There is no need" he replied with gratitude. "Can you help us carry the bags?" he said while straining to lift the first

"Sure son, I'll have them carried out to our car by our chauffer". At that point a man walked in, introduced himself and offered to lift the luggage and carry the trolley.

Tony thanked him and started walking to the exit pushing the stroller, with Senior by his side. During the car ride Senior helped Tali unwrap her present. Once they arrived at the hotel, he carried Tali to the elevators while Tony followed. When they got into the suite, Senior placed Tali's toys on the sofa. Once she got off the stroller, she immediately run to the couch to play with Kalev.

"What is it, by the way?" said Tony.

"Oh" said Senior "it's a cashmere scarf. Very beautiful. I bought it in Milan, top of its kind. It can get cold here in Geneva" he said, as Tali was using it as a blanket to cover Kalev.

"Nice, but winter isn't coming for many more months, dad".

"So what? I started shopping a little earlier".

Tony walked towards the big window behind the sofa and looked out. "We are not going to stay here in Geneva for that long" he said with a serious tone.

"Why not?" asked Senior worried.

"We talked about this, dad" he said, looking him straight in the eyes while still holding the picture "We have to go to Israel to get some answers".

"I know you have a feeling she is still alive, but…" said Senior, doubtful.

"I know she is, dad" he replied bluntly. His voice was steadfast, as if he was talking about something he knew for a fact.

Senior didn't want to add a single word. He had a feeling she was alive too, but Vance's word felt more certain.

"Ok, Junior. I have to go back downstairs for a while now".

"Still hitting the bar of every hotel you stay in, dad?"

"Not this time. This time I have to meet up with a business associate. A chat never hurt anyone" he said, excitedly.

Tony shook his head. "That's fine" he said. "I have to put Tali to sleep anyway".

"I'll be back before you know it" said Senior with a smile. He blew a kiss to Tali and disappeared in the hallway.

"Granpa will never change," said Tony. Tali turned and smiled up at him.

"I've known that Ima is alive for a while. And you know that too, don't you Tali?" he continued. Then he got up, went over to the chair where her go-bag was placed. He leaned and opened it up, searched it for a bit and then emerged with the photo. He then walked towards his daughter and sat down next to her.

"You know, mom and I worked together. Many years ago, we had to go to Paris for a case. We had to bring a witness back to DC" he continued, as if his daughter could understand what he was talking about. Truth is, he needed to tell that story to someone, someone who couldn't tell it to anyone else because for many years, it had been their secret.

"It was dangerous, we were worried the witness might get killed, so during that operation we came up with a plan – on how to communicate with one another without anyone else knowing. We used this way of hiding messages in frames that our boss made up with his partner many years before "he continued while turning and opening the back of the frame. "We only used this twice in Paris, but as soon as I saw this picture in your mom's go-bag… I knew".

He was weighing his next words like someone who is finally letting a secret off his chest.

"I have wondered about many things since you showed up, like how did mommy find the time to prepare her go-bag if she was ambushed in her sleep?" he was looking up at Tali and his eyes were beaming with something new – clarity. "When I saw this picture – of mom and I, in Paris – I just knew. I knew she had gotten a warning and possibly wanted to tell me something, something more. I knew that if she hid something anyone could find but only I knew how to decode, that meant the message was for me" he said as Tali bent down to look at the frame too.

Tony turned the frame, opened it up and found what seemed to be a coded message written in numbers.

Tali reached out to grab the photo, but Tony stopped her and stood up.

His eyes lit up. "I think I know what this means" he said.

As soon as Orli and Tali boarded the plane from Tel Aviv to Washington, Ziva left to meet the only agent who could help her find the woman who wanted her dead. He was the only one still operative who had gone undercover inside the terrorist cell Ari had led, according to Orli.

She met with him in Lebanon but he couldn't tell her anything as the woman who was looking for her was most likely someone he had never met and therefore couldn't describe. He also couldn't tell her much about where she might be as he hadn't heard from anyone from the terrorist cell since leaving the mission years prior.

She then went to Jordan for a couple of months, following a lead from one of her CIA contacts.

None of those leads led to anything, so she decided to go back to see Adam in Washington.

She hadn't been back since leaving NCIS. She missed Odette, her motherly and wise advice, her guidance and counsel and especially her hut, her safe place, where she had left many possessions, including many of her diaries.

She travelled back to Tel Aviv on a dry summer day, gathered a few possessions and left for Washington.

Ziva had called Odette to tell her she was coming to stay for a few days and when she arrived at the hut she was there, waiting.

"It's so good to see you, my dear" she said. "But isn't it dangerous for you to travel back here?"

"It's good to see you too," said Ziva. They proceeded to walk inside and Odette closed the door.

"Why are you here?"

"I had to slow down for a while, collect my thoughts…" said Ziva, walking around the hut only to notice everything was exactly the way she had left it. "I know it might seem reckless…"

"It is. You don't know where she is, who her followers are...," said Odette.

"I don't, but all the leads so far have led me nowhere. I am here to meet a friend who might be able to tell me where to go next," said Ziva.

"I'm sure you'll find her and put an end to this," said Odette.

Adam met up with her a few hours later. Ziva had settled in the hut, taken a shower, changed into more comfortable clothes. She was sitting on the couch when she heard a knock at the door.

As she opened it, she saw a tired Adam smiling at her.

"Hi" he said, kindly.

"It's so good to see you, Adam."

"I'm sure I'm the first familiar face you've seen in months".

"After Odette, you are" said Ziva, closing the door behind him as he walked in and sitting back down.

"I just don't know if I'm going in the right direction" she said, cutting to the chase.

"I don't have the information you need, I'm afraid. I don't know who she is".

"I know" said Ziva, passing her fingers through her hair. "But I was told by Caleb one of your contacts has worked undercover in the terrorist cell".

"You've talked to the CIA?"

"I've tried following a lead" she said, defensively.

"I don't have those contacts anymore, but I might know someone who could know someone who was involved. I'll tell you more when I gain more information".

"Thank you" she said, standing back up. "So…" she said, trying to hold back her tears. "The last time I saw Tali, I left her with you. How was she?"

Flashback

Adam showed her some of the pictures he had taken.

"She's safe. There she is: I observed them from afar the entire journey. She cried on the plane with Orli but once she saw Tony… "he said as she moved her hands through the picture. "There were no more tears".

Her hands moved on a picture with Tony sitting in the park with a grave look and Tali in the stroller in front of him.

"He put her in a stroller and took her to the park, huh?"

Her face turned serious as she handed them back to Adam.

"You must take these and destroy them, Adam, please". Adam nodded.

"I cannot bring myself to do it" she added, sadly.

"The panic?" asked Adam as she walked and sat back down on the couch.

"Comes and goes after I left Tali, but Tali's safety is not the only thing I worry about. Tony is going to come looking for me... of that I am certain. So will Gibbs" she said.

"They believe the story; they believe you're dead" he said. "Ziva, we will work together: we will find this threat against you and we will neutralize it and you'll have Tony and Tali again," said Adam.

She placed the handkerchief on the bedside table.

"I'm not myself, Adam. I am weak".

"Weakness" he said, taking the handkerchief and placing it back in her hands. "Is not accepting help when you need it, my friend".

"Thank you" said Ziva, caressing his cheek.

End of flashback

September 2016

"Tony"

"Orli"

"I wasn't expecting to see you, not so soon anyway"

"Kort's dead. It took me a few days to say goodbye, collect my things…"

"We've received intel regarding his death" she replied calmly. "We've heard you've left NCIS, too" she continued, with a look that seemed everything but surprised on her face.

Tony turned his head, bend over the railing and raised his gaze towards the golden lights coming from the glass windows.

"Finding out about Tali has definitely shaken things up. I couldn't continue to risk my life everyday knowing I am all she has".

Orli was looking at him tenderly: "How's Tali, by the way?"

"She's ok. Misses her mom…" he replied. "That's why I'm here. I need to find Ziva…" he said sternly. He looked at Orli. His gaze was piercing, like the look of someone who is determined to do anything to find the one they love.

"I told you everything I know," said Orli.

"I know you are protecting her, even though I don't need to know why - she'll tell me that. Have you prepared what I asked you?"

"I have" said Orli, handing him a file. "These are all the homes and properties Ziva has lived in, visited or been to in the last three years and all of her contacts here at Mossad. I've also listed names and phone numbers of all her family members and friends, even those who don't live in Israel".

"Thank you".

"Tony… if you believe she is alive, I have a feeling only you would know where to look. If she is hiding somewhere, I am afraid didn't share that piece of information to Mossad or anyone else among her friends or family circle".

Tony smiled. "I have found her once, I'll do it again" he said, "I'm going to start with Paris".

"Good. We will book a flight for you and Tali. Adam will accompany you, just in case".

"Thank you, Orli, but we are not going to leave just yet. I want to go back to the farmhouse first".

"It was reduced to ashes" said Orli, surprised.

"Still, I need to look for whatever might point me in her direction. If that was the last place she was seen, I can't leave without taking a look".

"Ok, we can take care of Tali while you go there" she said gently. "But before you go, Tony, remember this: Kort was one of many criminals who have crossed your paths. The criminal activities he was involved in, the amount of information he possessed and the number of CIA operations he was a part of have died with him, but that might not be the only person who comes back from your past. Always be careful, every step of the way".

"I will, Director" said Tony, turning his back on Orli and walking away.

"Let's hope you find her before anyone else does, DiNozzo" whispered Orli. For the first time, you could tell she was truly worried about something darker than he could possibly imagine.

Tony was already at the tarmac with Tali, loading bags and her stroller onto the plane.

"Tony!" called out Adam.

"Hi, Adam".

"Orli told me you'd be leaving this morning and I should come and help you with Tali," said Adam.

"Thanks. I need a trained agent I can trust to watch over her when I can't".

"So, what's the plan?" Adam asked impatiently.

"I'll brief you once we get to Paris".

"Orli said you didn't need a place to stay so I'm guessing you've already got one".

"I got that covered," said Tony. "Listen, Adam… I'll need your help once I find out more".

"You can count on it. A car will be waiting for us when we get there and we'll go wherever you want to".

Once the plane landed, Tony and Adam got into a taxi. Tony showed an address to the driver and he took them to a building that was right outside the city centre. They took the elevator to the second floor. While Tony carried Tali in his arms, Adam was walking right before the, holding his gun up. When they got to the right floor, Tony nodded at Adam as a sign for him to enter the apartment first. They all entered the room, walking stealthy.

It was a clean but old apartment, with very few pieces of furniture. It didn't look very airy.

Adam walked into every room, opened all wardrobes and drawers, looked under beds, the desk and table and checked the situation on the streets from the window.

"All clear" said Adam, returning to the front door, which opened onto a living room and dining area.

"The front's clear too" replied Tony, with a sigh of relief, as he finished looking around himself. Tali immediately run off to play with Kalev.

"What is this place?" asked Adam.

"An NCIS safe house in Paris. It's usually where agents hide when their cover gets blown".

"Is this where you expect to find Ziva?"

"No" said Tony, while starting to unpack.

"Ziva's at our safe house" he replied with a smile.

"I don't understand" said Adam, puzzled.

"Well," he continued "years ago Ziva and I had a mission here in Paris. We went to the Embassy to pick up a witness, but this was the house those who assigned us the mission told us we could go in case we needed to hide before going back to DC. I remember Ziva told me about a condo she had, a place no one knew about. She told me that's where she would go if she ever needed a shelter and Washington and Tel Aviv weren't an option. I think she probably went there after hearing about the bombing, since all the properties that ever belonged to her father could have been potential targets. That's where we are going".

"I didn't know she was still alive until I saw this" said Tony as he took out the picture frame of him and Ziva in Paris from Tali's go-bag.

"As soon as I saw it, I opened it up-" he turned the frame and opened up the back "and I saw this" he said, showing Adam series of numbers written on the back of the photo.

"I will need you to keep an eye on Tali while I go check this out in tomorrow" said Tony "I hope Ziva's still there"

"What is this?"

"An address," said Tony.

"Wow, you and Ziva have established your own code system. That's impressive" said Adam surprised.

"It's a long story. Will you help me out with this?" asked Tony.

"Don't worry, Tony, I got your back".

"Thanks" said Tony as he took a sip of water from an almost empty water bottle he had carried during the flight.

"Tony…" added Adam with a hint of hesitation in his voice "I just wanted you to know that nothing happened between me and Ziva".

"I know, Adam, don't worry. Actually, I appreciate you doing all of this for us… for Ziva and Tali. Ziva trusted you and I do too. Now" he said, while getting up from the chair "I have to go put this young lady to bed before she gets cranky" he said, as he got up carrying Tali and disappeared into the bedroom.

"Tomorrow's a big day. Make sure you get some sleep. Night, Adam".

"Night" he replied.

Adam and Tony took turns during the night to make sure someone was awake to guard the apartment at all times, but nothing significant happened. Tony took the 9-pm shift and went to bed at around 2 am. The sun rose early and the sunbeams brightened all rooms. When he woke up at around 7 am, the neighbourhood was still fairly quiet.

"Had a good sleep, Tony?" said Adam as Tony emerged from his room.

His hair was sticking up and he was wearing a loose grey sweat suit with the words "Ohio State" written in big, red letters on his hoodie. "Great, thanks" he replied, while yawning and stretching. Adam was sitting at the table, looking at his laptop and with his gun right next to him.

"You could have slept a while longer. Tali is not even up yet".

"She'll be soon, that little devil" he said with a smirk.

"Are you nervous?" asked Adam

"I'm shaking" he said, serious.

Tony had never been to Ziva's safehouse before, but he knew exactly where it was: in the outskirts of Paris, a small, poorly furnished apartment on the 4th floor of a white, old building with narrow stairs.

He walked all the way up, then along the wooden corridor to get to a door Ziva's coded instructions pointed to.

He broke in and found a poorly furnished apartment. It was dusty but not as much as one would expect for a safehouse that had been hardly ever used in the past 10 years.

He started searching for a clue, a hint, anything that could point him in the right direction.

After an hour of searching, he realised he couldn't find anything. The place was spotless, there were no hidden cameras, bugs or fingerprints. She clearly hadn't left anything behind – or had never walked through that door at all.

As he sat down on the sofa in that empty apartment, his mind went back to the days he spent at Ziva's home in Tel Aviv.

Flashback

"Stop this for him" she said.

"Of course… Gibbs" realised Tony.

"I want to make him proud. He taught me to follow my heart and I have to… I have to do this… alone".

End of flashback

As he thought about her words, he remembered how she had always tried to follow his lead, learn as much as she could from him and… follow his rules. Suddenly, "Never go anywhere without a knife" and "Always look under" resonated in his head like a chant.

He knelt in front of the bed, took out his knife, cut through the mattress and thrust his arm inside the padding. He searched for a while and took out a picture frame.

October 2016

Ziva heard some steps in the hallway. She immediately stood behind the door; her gun raised by her head.

He knocked the way they only knew how. She hesitated, then the door inched open and you could see a face lit by the sunrays that were cracking through.

Her two, dark eyes immediately grew wider. Ziva gasped, then she started lowering her gun.

"May I come in?" Tony said. The door opened more and he walked into what looked like an old and dusty apartment. There was a window on the right side and a sofa facing the door. On the right side, a small round table with two chairs and an old kitchen. There was no food, a visible bed or any of Ziva's possessions: Tony could tell it was a safe house she visited for long, leaving nothing behind her each time, like a crossing point she couldn't afford would trace back to her. He wondered what her life must have been like but soon shook off that through.

He walked in and towards the kitchen table. She kept looking at him like she was scared of what he might say.

"Are you going to say anything?" said Tony, smiling and choking up.

"You found me" she said. He was still looking at her in that same loving but serious way. They both paused for a second and she gulped loudly. "Where is she?" she asked, her voice almost breaking.

Her curly hair was scattered on her shoulders, she had dirt all over her face and fingers. She didn't resemble the strong and fierce Ziva Tony remembered: she simply looked like an exhausted and desperate mother.

"She's safe" he said gently.

"Tony… I'm sorry" she confessed "I'm sorry… about… everything".

He walked towards her and she held her breath. Tony grabbed her neck and kissed her on the forehead. Ziva trembled with relief and wrapped her hands around him. She exhaled. He looked into her eyes and her eyes longing for him to say something, anything.

"You know…" he began, walking towards the kitchen "I wondered how this could go a dozen times on my way here. I've thought about how you'd be… how I would feel… seeing you" he said.

"Tony…" she interrupted him. He turned around and met her gaze.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked.

She walked toward the sofa and sat down, sighing. "I wanted to come back to Washington as soon as you left. I knew I needed to. I am not the kind of person who runs and hides… I wanted to be there for the whole team, I didn't want to leave you…"

"But then you found out about Tali" he interrupted her.

Ziva looked at him a little surprised: it's like he read her mind. "My whole world changed" she said, her eyes filling with tears. "I decided to stay in Israel because I wanted to get away from my father's world, but when I found out about her everything changed" she continued. "I chose to stay… for her. I needed to start over, not just for me but for her too. This was my chance to give her what I never had… a normal life".

"I get it" he said bluntly. He knelt down in front of her "I've felt the same way. I've left NCIS to take care of her".

Ziva looked surprised but soon turned serious.

"This is exactly why I didn't want to tell you: I didn't want you to give everything up".

"Ziva, come on…"

"I mean, I knew I would have had to tell you eventually but I…"

"You what?" asked Tony, visibly upset.

"I didn't think I could, Tony!" she replied angrily. "After I found out about Tali, it took me months to come to terms with it… I was so scared" she continued, on the verge of crying. "Nothing has ever gone right for me. Anyone who has ever come too close has ended up dead. Whenever I would get close to a happy ending, it would slip away. I've lost everything I wanted to have. When I found out about Tali, I got so scared that I would lose her too. She was the dream I didn't want to wake up from. And as they years went on, I struggled with how to tell you… I started fearing you'd never forgive me for keeping her from you for so long. I had seen too much in my life go to shatters, I couldn't stand the chance of losing you too."

"You never would have lost me" he said resolutely. "You have no idea how many times I wanted to come back. Even though I didn't know about her… I felt I needed to come back… for you. And if I had known about her, I would have come for you both in a heartbeat, Ziva" he said, leaning in towards her.

"I'm sorry" she said, saddened. "I just…"

"You didn't believe in us?" asked Tony.

Ziva was taken aback. Neither of them had ever used the word "us" before.

"It's not that…" she said. "The thing is, I was also scared that if I told you we would be pulled back into that world".

"I never would have let that happen."

"Tony, our pasts are so dark… we both know that at any time they can come back and haunt us… and find Tali".

"And you're right" agreed Tony, moving her curly hair away from her face. "But we fought, Ziva. Kort's dead. The threat has been neutralized".

"I know he's dead, but it's not over" she continued, sighing.

"I know you think might never be over: we have our fair share of enemies, but we can't let us paralyze us".

"Tony, you don't understand" she said sternly. "When I got intel about Kort's intentions to bomb the farmhouse, I was already packing".

"What are you talking about?" asked Tony.

"The bombing wasn't the reason I left: it was the means" she continued. For the first time, he seemed confused.

"A few months ago, I received intel about a terrorist cell leader who was hunting me down".

"A terrorist?"

"Yes" she said, standing back up. "But I cannot tell you about this here… nor can we go anywhere. We cannot be seen together. Are you sure you weren't being followed here?" She seemed wary, like he had never seen her before. Almost… anxious.

"I'm sure" said Tony, resolutely. He stood up and walked towards her. "What's going on, Ziva?"

"Someone is after me and they won't stop until they find me… and kill me. That's why I had to leave her, Tony: I couldn't let them find her".

"Who exactly is this person?"

"I don't know. All I know is that it is a woman. Her name is Sahar and she is looking for me, but I don't know where she is or what she is up to. That's why I've had to fake my own death: I did it so she'd let her guard down and I could gain more information while keeping my distance".

"And what are you going to do? Gather information on this terrorist and fight her on your own? What if she has followers helping her cover her tracks, hide and get ammo?".

"It's not going to be easy. She seems to be part of several organizations and possibly have led some of them. That's why I need time: I need to get one step ahead of her".

"Ziva, you can't do this all on your own" he tried to convince her.

"I have to" she replied bluntly.

"No, you don't. I can help you".

"No, you can't. You understand what it's like to be a parent now. We can't leave Tali. She is our priority. She can't lose both of her parents" she said Ziva, her voice almost breaking.

"She is our priority" he continued "But I am worried about you Ziva. I've never seen you this way" he said, trying to calm her down by holding her by the shoulders.

She turned around like she had heard something "You have no idea what these people are capable of. They are not going to stop".

Tony paused for a second. "What happened to you, Ziva?"

Ziva looked at him as if she was on the verge of bursting into tears.

"I…" she started saying. "Years ago, I would have been able to do this without hesitating. But now… I don't think I can do this without her".

Tony could swear she had never talked more honestly and vulnerably before.

"You'll see her again soon, I promise" he said, hugging her tight.

"When?" asked Ziva, pulling away from the embrace, with her voice breaking. "This mission is most likely going to take months if not years".

He looked at her and smiled a little. "Why don't you come and stay with us tonight?" he asked.

Ziva was speechless. "Tony, I can't… she could..."

"You need a break, collect your thoughts…." he continued, looking deep into her eyes. "Just… spend the night with us. The hotel we are staying at here in Cairo is not far from here. You need to see her, I can tell".

Ziva's eyes immediately lit up and nodded slightly.

As Ziva entered the building, she was trembling. It had only been a couple of months, but she was still scared Tali wouldn't recognize her. It was dark as they had decided to go back to the hotel complex in the middle of the night so Ziva wouldn't be easily recognized. Adam had left that morning to go to Belgium to gather some intel, so another Mossad agent watched over Tali. When Tony opened the door, he greeted them and left.

Ziva looked back at Tony, who Ziva nodded. She walked inside, looking around.

It was a simple apartment, with light-coloured furniture. Tali was on the other side of the room, fast asleep in the queen-sized bed with Kalev by her side. Ziva walked quickly towards her, slowly laid down and moved her blonde locks from her face. "My Tali" she whispered. She laid down, embraced her gently and fell asleep holding her daughter. Tony looked at them lovingly. He smiled as he saw Ziva and Tali fall asleep in an embrace, then laid down on the sofa on the other side of them room and fell asleep.

In the middle of the night, he heard Ziva moan in her sleep. He walker close to her and was about to move Ziva's hair from her face when she woke up, startled.

"It's ok, it's me" he said. "You're both safe".

Ziva rolled towards her daughter, hugged her and went back to sleep.

Tony had already seen her like this once, but never remembered her this sweaty.

"What sort of horrible dream were you dreaming, Ziva?" he whispered.

"Thank you" said a voice behind him as he was making breakfast in the kitchen.

Ziva was standing by the kitchen's door. He smiled and served some pancakes on a plate.

"For what?" he asked.

"For everything?" she said, almost phrasing it like a question. "I don't even know what I was expecting when I left Tali with you, but you've done an amazing job".

"It's been the best job in the world" he said. She smiled.

"And I am sorry, for everything" she continued, looking into his eyes. "Sorry I didn't tell you sooner. It's not because I didn't want to, it's just..."

"I know" said Tony, placing the pan back on the stove. "You don't have to explain anything. It's all good" he said, smiling. Ziva smiled back.

Tali woke up shortly after their conversation and walked towards her parents. She hugged Ziva's knees tightly and Ziva lifted her up and kissed her. "My baby! Good morning, Tali!"

"Look what daddy made for breakfast: pancakes!" said Tony.

"Yay!" yelled Tali, putting her elbows on the table.

"They're her favourite" said Tony to Ziva, putting a few pancakes on a plate.

Ziva smiled and hugged her daughter tight, knowing that was the first and last morning she could wake up next to her daughter with a pile of hot blueberry pancakes waiting for them in the kitchen.

"What's this?" said Ziva suddenly. She was caressing her daughter's legs when she felt something on her knee and looked at it. Tali was wearing a heart-shaped, blue band-aid with white dots.

"Oh, it's a band-aid," said Tony. "She fell while we were at the park last week. "Then, remembering Ziva's nightmares and anxiety, he quickly added. "It won't happen again, I promise".

"A band-aid? I could never get her to wear one, no matter how much I tried," said Ziva.

"I had to cut it into the shape of a heart to trust me with it. I told her it was Ima's heart, beating for her, so she could be all better soon. She loved it and hasn't fought it once," said Tony. "She's really into shapes now. She loves building blocks".

"Does she?" she said, shocked.

"Ziva" he said, placing a hand on her shoulder. "You will get this. We will be together and you will have countless mornings to play with Tali. We will have our forever".

June 2017

Ziva hadn't slept in four days. She had been wandering around Israel following a new lead when one of her contacts told her the woman who was looking for her had moved close to the border with Lebanon, planning an attack, and later moved to Jordan. Ziva had just arrived in Amman when someone called her on her undercover cell phone.

Very few knew about it, so she answered and a Mossad agent identified himself and asked to meet up with her to speak in person.

He came to her safehouse in Amman the following day, telling her the director wanted to see her in Tel Aviv as soon as she was done following the lead in Amman.

Ziva got worried: Orli had never called her with such urgency ever since she had gone undercover.

What if something had happened to Tony or Tali? She couldn't bear the thought of that.

She didn't sleep for days as she travelled back to Israel.

When she arrived, she took the bus to the location where Orli had planned for a car to pick her up, which then took her to Orli's second home in the outskirts of the city.

When she walked in, she immediately noticed a striking difference between Orli's refined clothes and furnishing and her scruffy clothes. She had been travelling for at least a month with very few items at that point.

"Thank you for coming so quickly, I know you have a lot on your mind and I didn't want to take you away from your mission without a proper reason".

"Tell me Tony and Tali are ok" said Ziva without taking a breath.

"They are ok," said Orli. "Sorry if I made you believe they were the ones in danger".

Ziva sighed. "Then who is?" she asked.

"Why don't you sit down?" said Orli, showing her the couch and sitting down herself.

Ziva followed the orders, holding her breath.

"This is about Agent Gibbs and McGee" said Orli. "They've gone missing during their last mission abroad".

"What? When was this?" asked Ziva.

"Around two months ago. They went to Paraguay to look for a missing petty officer who was believed to have died there. They managed to find him alive and rescue him but while Agent Torres managed to escape, Gibbs and McGee apparently did not".

Ziva looked raging mad. "How come you haven't told me this sooner?"

"I didn't know about this until a couple of days ago. Information might not arrive immediately at Mossad but we do our best: it's not like NCIS discloses personal information on the whereabouts of its agents that easily. Yet you've asked me to keep you informed and let you know of anything I might find out as soon as I would and within days, I've managed to bring you this" said Orli, handing her a file. Ziva flipped through the pages and read carefully.

"Thank you, I appreciate it" she said, looking back up at Orli. "Do we know anything about their rescue plans? Is there a rescue team in place? Has anyone been there since they disappeared, searched the area?"

"I genuinely don't know. But don't be too concerned, I am sure they're doing their best" said Orli, trying to calm Ziva down.

"Do you know anything else about this mission?" said Ziva, looking back at the file. "Is this the petty officer you were talking about, Matthew Dean?"

"Yes, he went missing in Paraguay and NCIS found out he was there to gather information on a rebel group called "The Revolutionary Armed Council" committed to stealing uranium from the area to resell it to the highest bidder.

Officer Dean went missing as he tried to stop them, possibly captive by the rebels.

Ziva looked up, serious. "And when McGee and Gibbs went to rescue him, maybe they were captured by the same group. I know them, if they had been free, they would have found a way to escape and travel back. If they haven't it means someone is preventing them from moving away from the area" said Ziva, her reasoning almost hazing.

"Ziva…" said Orli with a calm voice, placing her hand on her knee. "Director Vance is the one I talked to about this. He said Agent Torres and officer Dean both saw agents Gibbs and McGee disappear into the woods with several armed rebels coming their way. They heard many gunshots and unfortunately never saw McGee or Gibbs again. Dear… there is a chance they might not be alive".

"No!" said Ziva, standing back up. "I know they're alive, I can feel it".

"Ziva, they might be but the chances are slim".

"They haven't found their bodies, so they aren't dead to me. I will find them" she said, resolutely.

"Ziva, you can't possibly think to go there alone! You're on your own mission, which is dangerous enough already. You're risking your life everyday so that you can reunite with your daughter- "

"My mission can wait a few weeks"

"If you do this, it could blow your cover" said Orli with the most serious tone. "Sahar might find out the truth, that you're alive!"

"I don't care. I can't leave them. I've been running for a year already and I have zero intel on where she is now or what she is planning. Maybe coming back from the dead might be the way to shake things up."

"Ziva, please, listen to me- "

"They're my family too, Orli" she said, looking at her with a look begging her to understand.

"You have to promise me you'll be careful because if she finds out you're alive, she will come after you with no mercy".

"I'll be waiting," said Ziva.

Ziva spent weeks working on gaining as much information as she could on Gibbs and McGee's mission. She reached out to all of her contacts still operating in South America and analysed the area in Paraguay where they had been seen last to locate the hut where they could have been held captive.

Even though all of her contacts believed they were dead, she still hatched a plan to get in and potentially get them out unnoticed. She travelled to Paraguay, met a contact, who helped her find a place to stay to plan her rescue mission and spent months there, turning around every rock to find them.

She analysed all activities in the area to find their exact potential location and waited for the right time to strike, but when she finally did, the rescue team arrived just an hour before her.

After that happened, she stayed in the area for two more weeks and found out some local militants were planning to seek revenge on what happened and as some of them were getting suspicious of the intense activity she was conducting from inside her hut, she carried out an ambush to kill as many as she could with one attack.

She got wounded and had to wait for a wound on her hand to heal before she could leave Paraguay.

She left on a plane to Washington to lay low for a while before going back to Tel Aviv to gain further intel on Sahar. As the plane was travelling over the Pacific, she looked at her hand, wounded and poorly stitched up and heard Adam's words echoing inside her head. "Ziva, this mission you want to embark on to Paraguay is suicide. Please, don't go".

"You never leave your team members behind" she thought as she caressed her own hand.

Then she looked out of the window: it was pitch dark, you could only see the blinking red light of the plane's wing and that's when she realised that she had just flown across the world and risked her life to try and save Gibbs and McGee even though they hadn't even questioned her death after it had been reported.

As she took one of her pills for anxiety, her eyes filled up with tears: she was so tired and yet she was about to start running from Sahar again. Alone, again.

February 2019

Ziva entered the hospital stealthily, holding what looked like a piece of torn paper in her hand.

She knew Bishop has been investigating on one of her old cases, the Morgan Burke case, and had been able to find the one responsible for it all. That had been one of Ziva's first cases at NCIS and she wanted to honour the victim's deceased mother final wish: to tell the kidnapper everything that poor mother felt and wanted him to know.

She slipped in the room through the door and closed it behind herself.

The kidnapper was there, half asleep. He turned around as soon as he heard her come in.

"Who are you?" he asked, with the voice of someone who has just been woken up. He clearly saw she was not a nurse.

"I'm your worst fear" she answered. She locked the door and took out the piece of paper.

"I have something to read to you" she said.

"I don't want to hear you" he replied, fearful.

"You don't get to choose this time" she continued. "These are the words that Morgan Burke's mother wanted you to hear. She waited her entire life for us to find you and say them to you herself. Before she passed, I promised her I would have read them to you and I would have gone to hell and back to do that".

"Who are you?!" he asked again, raising his voice and sounding more scared than ever.

"I am the one who worked on that case for months, over ten years ago. I cleared over twenty suspects and you probably thought it was over. But at NCIS we never stop looking, we never give up on one of our own!" yelled back Ziva. "You have no idea what it's like not to know where your loved ones are. You have no idea what that poor mother went through for all those years" she continued. "So now it's time you shut up and listen because I've waited enough to find you and I'm not going to let you get away this time".

May 2019

A couple of years later she was still on the run, still unsure about why Sahar wanted her dead and extremely tired.

She decided to meet up with Adam in Washington as he had new intel on Sahar.

Adam arrived at the office at sundown and gently knocked on the door.

"Hi" said Ziva as she opened the door. "It's so good to see you."

Adam looked worried but also smiled gently and greeted her back.

"So, what are your news?" she asked. "It's been months since I've last seen you".

"Well, you are not going to like to hear what I have to say" said Adam as he looked for some form of approval before starting the conversation. Ziva looked as if she was impatient to hear him talk, so he said:

"After joining the group, I found out that not only did Sahar find out you are still alive but she also found out that a couple of years ago you reached out to some of your contacts in South America to look for two missing NCIS agents".

"How could she have possibly known that?" asked Ziva worried.

"Ziva, Sahar is bloodthirsty and is trading any information on you or anyone who comes into contact with you with her complete trust. There are agents still operating in terrorist cells that know your contacts and have used information on them as trade goods to keep their cover. Some of your contacts cannot be trusted anymore as she is onto them and I am afraid she knows your whereabouts".

Ziva gulped. "What about Gibbs and McGee?" asked Ziva impatiently.

"I am sure she thought that if you looked for two agents so desperately you were willing to travel halfway across the world to find them two years ago, it was for a reason. She probably thinks they are very important to you and that maybe they could be people to target to get to you…" he answered. "And I fear she has already planned to do that.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

He sighed as if he didn't want to say the words out loud.

"What do you know?" asked Ziva angrily.

"Ziva, I think you should be thinking about yourself right know. Please, look after yourself" he said, starting to walk towards the door.

Flashback

"You're not leaving this room until you tell me what you found!" said Ziva, blocking the exit.

"Sahar has sent her men to bring in Gibbs. She will use him to get to you" he said, finally.

"They'll never take him alive. I must warn him".

Adam grabbed her before she could leave. "Ziva, they find you with Gibbs, you will pay the price… and so will I"

End of flashback

"I don't want you to get involved, acting as our mole inside her splinter group has been dangerous enough, but I can't let Sahar get to them, they have no idea she is coming".

"Ziva, let me help you. I'll warn them. I'll stay here, but you need to leave".

"Where am I supposed to go?" she said, on the brink of crying.

"I don't know, but you can't stay here anymore" he continued. You could tell he was feeling her sense of hopelessness because he was worried too. "Sahar is looking for you. If you leave and the news that you're not in the country anymore gets out, you might hijack them".

"No" said Ziva resolutely. "I know them. I've spent over three years running from them. I've seen what they're capable of and if they think Gibbs knows where I am, they'll torture him for information until he dies. I can't leave now".

She took a deep breath. "It's time to go see Gibbs again".

February 2020

Tony was holding Tali's hand when he lifted his gaze and saw her: she was standing on the sidewalk, wearing dark boots, a green trench coat and her curly hair all ruffled up on her shoulders. She looked tired, but she was smiling, a smile so big he swore he had never seen on her face. Tears were streaming down her cheeks and as he smiled back, they knew: all three of them were finally together, finally… home.