-NAKIRI ALICE-
AUGUST 20
Never in her wildest dreams...
Never in her obscenely wealthy and privileged life…
...did Nakiri Alice ever think her aide would have eyes for someone else.
You must excuse the molecular gastronomy genius's shock; it never crossed her mind. How was it even remotely possible for such an improbable phenomenon to occur? She really couldn't fathom it; that her very best friend and personal guard dog for over twelve years, Kurokiba Ryō, would ever notice a girl that wasn't her since they first met when they were five, not after she begged her parents how she did to let her have an aide and bring him with their adorable family of three back to Japan. (If she can have one, so can I! Hmph!)
That is, until she first saw them together in a way she thought he could only be with her; before, she'd ever doubted that his attention was only reserved for her.
Never in her wildest imagination did Nakiri Alice ever think…
And yet, here she was, wide awake with a hypothesis she never considered being her current reality.
And it was beginning to drive the brilliant food scientist insane.
Looking at the black screen of her cellphone, Alice had been sitting, waiting with a flurry of confusion, angst, and frustration spinning through her features. This weird feeling she just could not place had been gnawing and growing in the pit of her stomach from the moment she noticed the first signs that things were…different.
They were subtle things, things only she would notice because only she knew him so well: an imperceptibly wider distance between them as they walked; delayed responses to texts and missed calls never returned; uncharacteristic arguments in which she had to threaten the silent treatment to win; awkward run-in's throughout the mansion and school grounds that left them shuffling in place, but not uttering anything more than a few grunts before rushing away.
Unlike her younger cousin, the resident emotionally-dishonest ice queen, Alice did not have a problem admitting to jealousy, or any emotion for that matter.
But, this feeling spreading through her was a force of nature she had never reckoned with. So she did not know how to name it, let alone talk about it.
It was a monster, something akin to a stomach bug. It made her sick, sad, and lonely. Worst off, it made her miss him even more, making her more miserable.
Bringing herself back into her body, she taps—okay, bangs— on her blackened touchscreen for the tenth time in one minute. Out of habit. Out of reflex. Out of frustration. Still, much to her expected disappointment, if not surprising dismay, there were still no new messages from Ryō. Like there hadn't been for the last seven hours.
Alice growled inwardly as she swiped left on the endless dating app notification banners and school emails filling her lock screen and found herself in a full pout, wondering what the heck was going on. He didn't even tell her where he was going without her when he left that morning like he usually did— like he was expected to do on any typical day. He just texted her 'good morning' and 'see ya l8r' in that dry, stale way he sent all his texts.
Except, today was different for two reasons.
1. Ryō was granted permission (by Alice, of course) to participate in his hundredth Shokugeki with Hayama Akira. The snow-white-haired foxy Indian chef and master of curry had grown weary of constantly being interrupted during his Shiomi seminars for spontaneous food wars with the demonic chef that Ryō became in the kitchen, so they set a weekly standing appointment on their calendars specifically to "kick his smug ass" (as both bullheaded culinary students pronounced against the other). She stopped attending after the ninetieth draw.
This leads to the second reason today was different: she couldn't be as angry as she wanted to be at his silence because, technically, he had done nothing wrong. She had given him the day off, notably pausing all manners of his assistant duties because…
2. Today was Ryō's eighteenth birthday.
But, apparently, she was a silly, naïve fool to have thought he would just naturally choose to spend his first free day in six months…his birthday, at that…with her. She never even considered that he wouldn't want to. They always did everything together. She was his fairest mistress. He was her fiercest protector. They melded together like iron and silver.
She always got her way. He was always at her beck and call. So it was both too surreal and perplexing for the culinary princess to process—though her phone's lack of activity was evidence enough that he wouldn't spend any part of his birthday with her—until now.
She flicked her lock screen with her index finger and read his last messages for the umpteenth time. There is nothing left to decode or decipher, but she still does it.
'good morning'
'see ya l8r'
…are all that greeted her tearful scarlet irises.
So she waits. Alice could hear the nagging monster give out a long guttural sound, shoving her insides to make more room for itself in her hollowing chest, tearing a bigger chunk out of her already over-palpitating heart to reach its goal.
With each passing second…
She waits. That pit-sinking feeling starts to devour the fresh piece of organ it took slowly, and all Alice can do is clench her right fist over her left breast to keep herself from bleeding out. To wait for the seating pain in her chest to subside.
No, she didn't call him. Why should she? He knows what's going on just as much as she does. A few hours before, Alice mentally talked herself into practicing the deep-breathing exercises she saw on meditation apps and used to calm Ryō's cooking fury. It didn't work, but maybe she would give it another 'gain.
It's okay, Alice. Take a deep breath-inhale-hold-He's coming back-exhale… Sigh. I hope so.
But again, it's useless; she can't seem to calm down her aching heart and racing mind.
As if it were a prayer answered, just as she was beginning to feel her eyelids lose their resolve to hold back the tears welling up in that hole the monster left, Alice heard the main entrance of the Nakiri Mansion door knob turn. It was faint, the sound, but undeniable.
Her limping heart skips a beat, almost leaping out of her chest as she jumps to look at the front door of her grandfather's favorite home. Could it be? She quickly considers hope, sniffing up the trailing snot threatening to run down her nose, and begins to roll her tongue like a newspaper, ready to give him a severe tongue lashing for leaving her to her own devices all day— if only to disguise her deep hurt as a professional reprimand.
But… she pondered without reserve: did he read her mind, like he always did? Was he back to dispel her doubts with reassuring actions, like he always did? Maybe the hours they'd spent apart had been nothing but their busy schedules once again clashing as two of the top ten students in all of Tōtsuki Tea Ceremony and Cooking Academy.
She felt her usual entitled air returning to her lungs. He better be running back, groveling on his hands and knees to apologize!
But Alice couldn't deny that the once inseparable Japanese-Danish chefs-slash-childhood besties had been growing very distant as of late. She hated that she knew why but couldn't deny it anymore, nor could she bring herself to ask him outright. A new feeling for her, for sure. She'd never felt as unsure how to confront him with anything before because she never had to. They didn't hide things from each other. When introducing them to others, her mother likes to inappropriately divulge that they used to take baths together as kids.
So if there were ever a better time for him to reassure her of who she was to him, what importance and value she held in his life…if she knew her Ryō as well as he knew she did…he would surely choose today. It's his birthday, for crying out loud! He was supposed to make her feel special. Yes- his birthday was supposed to be about her because she would undoubtedly make it all about him. That's how their unique dynamic worked.
Alice had been so lost in her thoughts that she forgot she had been reclining in her favorite chaise in the grand foyer since she finished breakfast until she heard the doorknob turn. The Victorian Japanese chaise overlooked her favorite koi pond in the center courtyard on the property where she and Ryō had shared their first…
Yes, that's it, Alice convinced herself. Her most trusted aide had returned. Why wouldn't he? He's home.
The door swung open, and Alice scrambled to her feet, wiping the faint traces of tears from her eyes, ready to see the only person she had been missing all day.
"Oh. Hello, Alice."
The partially-bitten, barely beating heart of Alice Nakiri simply stopped and nosedived into the readied monster's wide mouth.
It wasn't him. Her head sagged, impressively feeling heavier than her heart. She'd hoped it was invisible to the newly arrived and loitering staff. Snap out of it! Alice shook her head to shake off disappointment, not wanting the judgmental tone of the equally spoiled brat and pretentious heiress of the Nakiri empire—and that was saying a lot coming from Alice—to lord this particular weakness over her.
Good thing she did because from the look of things, she was the first cousin between the two to notice a change in the other. A wicked grin quickly spread across her feline face.
"Oh? No snarky remark upon entry, huh, cuzzo? Hmm," she feigned offense, curiously popping her head to the side. "And to think, I wasn't expecting you to be this head-in-the-clouds over your date with Yukihira-kun."
She knows that's not really a dig. And that she has most certainly dished out better. But sue her lapse in fluency in bitch; her heart was hurting.
When Alice first heard Erina's greeting, her brain instinctively prepared a sharp comeback as she always had at the ready for her equally biting kin, fully expecting to receive the same monotonous and displeased nasally pitch her dear cousin held onto. But she didn't hear anything like that.
Instead, Erina's greeting was calm and soft. Even more shocking, her blonde-haired bad-attitude cousin's voice sounded…tender. In fact, she sounded downright kindhearted, which was definitely new. Were Alice's ears deceiving her? Did she even hear a sprinkle of…joy?
Alice has always been keenly perceptive. What else could be expected from one of the top global experts in molecular gastronomy by the time she was nine? People liked to make themselves believe that because she's always so adorably charismatic, and while she wouldn't dare call herself this, a total anime vixen, she should have a pea for brains. But, the too pale-haired and the too pale-skinned girl who would much instead regard herself as a vintage starlet enjoyed watching people realize they were all dumber than her and that she was lightyears smarter than them all.
Nevertheless, her bubbly allure served as the perfect cover for how cunning she was, how much she noticed that others ignored, and just how gifted a food scientist she had become. If Erina Nakiri is the 'God Tongue' of the gourmet culinary world, then Alice Nakiri was the 'Heaven-Sent Child of Molecular Gastronomy.'
So she replaced the blade on her tongue with a more serrated knife and settled her gaze on her cousin. No, that's not it. Alice scanned her cousin's face with more critical eyes and saw the truth.
Her first rival and younger cousin didn't even attempt to look up from the bouquet of what looked to be twelve fully bloomed damask roses in her tight grip. She was too transfixed by the endless layers of deep red petals folding and fanning outward to comment on how pathetically flat Alice's insult fell. This caused Alice to begin wondering if the other girl was her. Had Erina even heard her while she leaned flush against the main door with her eyes closed? From the look on Erina's face, Alice was sure that the answer was no and that the door was the only reason she was still standing up.
Because, if her observations were correct, Erina Nakiri, the Ice Queen herself, looked…
Pleased. Alice heard a small voice finish her thoughts. Erina stood before Alice, looking like she finally understood what it meant to be satisfied. And at that, Alice simply, positively needed to know more! Because the infamously picky taste tester was rarely ever satisfied, and 'pleased and satisfied' were two of Alice's favorite emotions.
"Ahem."
Erina stayed frozen in time and place. Alice slowly shook her head in tempo as her tongue clucked three times in her mouth and did what only a cousin from childhood can do best.
"Erinaaaa, oh Erinaaaa!" She teased. Still nothing. Okay… fine. She'll move to pouty pestering.
"~Mou! Erina-sama! Pay attention to meeee! Honestly!" She balled her fists and pumped them while stamping her left foot like the perpetual four-year-old she is when she doesn't get her way. "And to think, Erina! I thought you couldn't be more pleased to see me than you usually are." Alice winked, turning her pout into a cheeky grin at her star-dazed cousin.
Erina slowly let her head hang to the side in sincere confusion, like she had just remembered that her cousin was standing right in front of her. Her eyes danced over Alice's face, absorbing her cousin's suggestive grin, posh stance, and crossed arms.
Usually, this would irritate Erina because she does not tolerate childish nonsense or any nonsense for that matter. And because it's Alice, she would just roll her eyes and walk away. Alice was a demanding child who grew into an even more demanding teenager. Usually, this would make a blood vessel in Erina's temple pop, and she would lash out, though Alice never seemed to care; Alice also never seemed to know when to read the room or leave her in peace. Usually, this would force Erina to wish her once distant pain-in-the-ass cousin had stayed in Denmark as she had for ten years and not returned to Japan and their family legacy in middle school.
But what she did caught Alice so off guard that the older cousin slammed a hand on the door dangerously close to the younger cousin's head and leaned her body at her waist for closer inspection. She daringly pressed her bosom against the bouquet in Erina's hand, only to be met with a firm but forgiving open palm pushing her doughy chest back.
Erina simply softly replied, "I am pleased to see you, my dear Alice." Alice only saw Erina's violet eyes twinkle with the same purity while she read shojō manga; unless it were the redikomi manga Alice shared with her, then she'd only look flushed and flustered.
"Okay! Where is Erina Nakiri, and what have you done with her?" Alice boomed, her skepticism oozing out at the sincerity in Erina's tone. "What's going on with you, missy?! Spill!" Alice whined, needing to get to the bottom of her cousin's sudden personality change. She loved hearing about the things Erina was too shy and proper to divulge without a little…encouragement. What can she say? Her cousin lived an exciting, if not insanely sheltered, life because Erina's life had always been quite the emotional rollercoaster. At that moment, Alice Nakiri regretted not having a fresh bowl of buttery popcorn in her hand. She should have ordered Ry—
"Nothing…" Erina bashfully replied finally, saving Alice from herself. The heiress didn't look as embarrassed as Alice expected, but there was something…new in her body language and eyes as she spoke. As if she were still stuck in a beautiful fantasy…or an even better memory. Alice just kept a stern but highly intrigued gaze on the increasingly blushing red blonde.
"I said, it's nothing, Alice!" Erina fussed, trying to access that indifferent tone that could even dismiss a housefly, and it would be forced to obey. But she should have known better, considering who she was talking to.
"…"
"…"
"…"
"…" Erina was saying "nothing" to her cousin-slash-frenemy, but to be totally honest, the silence was suffocating her because something was bursting at the seams within her. Something that made her shameless to show how it made her rosy pink all over her face. And she desperately wanted to share it because—Wow!—she knew as well as she knows the chemical compounds in every single ingredient that is blessed to touch her divine tastebuds that she had never felt this way before, not even in her prematurely adultified life.
Erina crossed her arms, hugging herself tightly, the crinkling of the bouquet's wrapping paper filling the Nakiri mansion's main entrance, and released a small calming exhale.
Silently with the same satisfied smile she entered, she slid out of her cousin's face and walked through her mansion (hey, what's her grandfather's is her's by birthright, understood?) to her bedroom on the second floor.
Alice, never one to accept being ignored—although no female Nakiri member ever was—was high on her cousin's heels. "Mou! Erina-sama! Don't just ignore me! Answer me! I bet if I were Hishoko I'd already know."
Alice's pout reached Erina's ears from behind, and all the blonde could do was giggle. She wasn't ignoring the bratty Dane; she simply refused to discuss this important matter anywhere but in the privacy of her bedroom. She needed—no, wanted to share this…this feeling that was blooming inside of her. For once in her whole life, she didn't want to swallow her excitement or shoo away the butterflies from the sight of those she loved and trusted the most. She actually wanted to talk? Erina never wanted to speak, especially not about her emotions. She preferred to reserve her limited conversations to matters surrounding her business, the Tohtsuki Council of Ten and, okay, her boyfriend. She blushed to herself over the latter.
Everything else felt like an utter waste of time discussing, especially her feelings. Why share her feelings with people who could not relate? Why be vulnerable to those who can just as quickly hurt or manipulate you or anything else? There was too much painful history for her to be so carefree…so careless with her inner life. But that was all in the past, too. That was all before today because today, Erina Nakiri had officially been with her dashing chef of a boyfriend for six months.
Six whole, entire months. The prim and proper princess, locked away in her golden cage, never saw it coming. Love is something else.
Typically, it would have been Hisako Arato that she'd talked to about this, even shyly. Hisako, her ever-reliable secretary, loyal and most-trusted aide. Hisako, her absolute best friend in the whole wide world…(well, her other absolute best friend in the whole wide world). Hisako was always the first if not the only person to ever know anything personal about Erina and do anything for her. It had been a necessary precaution when they were younger, but now, it was like breathing air talking to Hisako. Though, coming from a broken and neglectful home, she still was too traumatized and reserved the most profound truths for herself.
And for Sōma.
Hisako was the only other person she wanted to talk about her day with, but Hisako had been called back to her ancestral home for personal matters right before Erina left for her date, so she gave her the rest of the day off to attend to things. If not, the two girls would have already been locked away in her room, gossiping and giggling the rest of their rare lazy Saturday away. Of course, she'd sent her an obligatory—"Hisako! The most unbelievable thing ever happened to me! Hope you are well. Ttyl!"—text before she entered the mansion. But Alice didn't need to know that. It was far more fun watching her squeal and squirm in jealous protest.
Once inside the comfort and security of the younger Nakiri princess's grand bedroom, she closed and locked the door and ran to her cloud-soft bed, sinking her back deep into the mattress like she believed she was floating in a cold pool on a muggy summer day. Erina let out a deep and dreamy sigh as she landed in her freshly laundered sheets.
Alice hopped on the bed beside her, legs folded under, and violently shook her entranced cousin.
"ERINAAAAAA! TELLLL MEEEEEE!"
Erina lifted herself onto her elbows, halfway out of her trance, and quietly said…
"Sōma said he loves me."
The sentence sounded like a stack of plates dropping in her brain. Alice heard squealing in teenage girl excitement before she realized the shrieking was coming from her.
"Whatttt?" It was all so damn shocking and so damn cute to hear that from tight-lipped Erina that, for a second there, Alice was unsure she seriously heard the girl. She doubted Erina had even said a word. But—
"Sōma-kun said he loves me." She repeated it, but more to herself this time. This time, Erina said it with more chest and mental clarity, as if the reality of the implication was gradually setting in. Erina's eyes darted across her ceiling, her heart racing in delight, her breathing struggling to push out her restless lungs.
She…honestly couldn't believe it herself.
"Like, love how we love Grandfather or, like…" Alice's eyebrows furrowed suggestively, "love, love?" Her voice drawled like a seductive geisha. She could barely contain herself. Neither girl could. So they didn't. And they squealed and giggled and laughed from the thrill of it all for five uninterrupted minutes before Alice finally, gasping for air, prodded onward.
"Eeeeek! Okay, Tell me everything and leave out nothing!"
"…Okay."
"Wait!"
"What?"
"Does Hishoko already know about this?"
"Don't be rude! Hisako-" Erina firmly corrected, "…does not yet know." That revelation sent Alice shooting through the open ceiling of Erina's canopy bed.
"Then I mean it: Tell me everything and leave absolutely NOTHING out!"
Erina's face slightly turned into annoyance at her cousin's childish rivalry against her best friend for her attention. The two girls served two very different purposes and roles in her life.
Hisako was there as her aide, intel, hit-woman, her faithful second-in-command, and indeed her most-trusted confidant and best friend.
Alice, on the other hand? Alice was the thorn poking out of Erina's rose stem (that she loved dearly, of course).
But she left nothing out for her cousin, even the things that made her blush and pout so much that she stayed dropping a sweat. As Erina began to recount the afternoon she had with her boyfriend of officially six months (she couldn't get over saying that)- how he picked her up on his sage green motorbike and whisked her away for a Saturday morning ride downtown Tokyo; how he took her to a ryokan that overlooked a breathtaking view of something or another…how they talked endlessly about everything like they'd just met, played multiple rounds of hanafuda, only exchanging comfortable silence for body-tingling smooches…how the couple did this and did that, exploring each other's bodies with some playful skinship…how he showed her this and told her that with his tongue; how they had a picnic under some gorgeous blossoming tree or another and ate an amazing meal, (or she sounded like she said four-course) or whatever. And told her all the reasons why he loved her.
…All Alice could feel was her entire body shutting down. Her hearing was fading, just as her already weary heart weakened even more. Her throat dried, her voice caught, and there was an odd tingling numbness in the pads of her fingers and toes that just…that just…
That just made her long for Ryō.
She had been given a fully immersive replay of the best date her cousin had ever been on. She'd asked for all the details about Erina's day spent with her first serious boyfriend.
Erina Nakiri and Sōma Yukihira, Tōtsuki Academy's number one it-couple and First and Second Seats, respectively. The most influential couple of the 92nd generation had gone on an enviable six-monthaversary date.
It made her wish it were them instead of them. But she asked for it, and while beggars can't be choosers, she will always be wealthy, so she just should've kept her mouth shut.
"Hmmm," she hummed in her signature melodic thinking tone while also trying her best to conceal how deep her envy ran. "I'm impressed. To think that red-haired, scarred-brow devil really finally did it, huh?" She said in genuine awe and happiness for her cousin. She had never seen Erina giddy like this except when she was with Yukihira. Alice appreciated the lightness her friendly rival brought to her rivaled cousin's life and deep eyes. The girl had seen and experienced enough darkness to cover three lifetimes. She couldn't be happier that they had stopped being stupid over the other and finally made their romantic relationship a reality.
"Yeah, I know," Erina quietly said, smiling to herself. She smelled the bouquet in her hand, silently counting all twelve ("Six for our first months and six for our next," the red-haired fox she was dating said in earnest, melting her expectant gaze into his molten gold eyes, before quickly adding with his cheeky grin, "And don't worry, I know they won't all last for twelve months, but I will. And we'll last for even longer than that!")
"Annnnnd?" Alice snatched Erina out of the precious memory. Erina twisted her face in confusion, having not heard or understood what more needed to be said. She had told all that she wanted to share.
"And, what?"
"And! Did you say it back? Do you love him, too, you dodo bird?! Are you in love with him, too?"
"In love?!" She was bewildered and embarrassed as her boyfriend had actually said those words to her, but that was her business.
"Uh, yuh!" Alice replied, knocking on the crown of Erina's thick head of golden blonde hair. "Why else would saying, 'I love you, Erina Nakiri, my bountiful, bosomy prin-"
"Shut it, Alice! He did not say any of that! He simply said he loves me." She cleared her throat to calm her nerves. And yes, I told him I love him, too."
"—cess. Oh, alright." Alice conceded, dropping the act and slightly frowning at her in disapproval. "But, honestly, Erina-cchi. How long will you act like you can't put two and two together? Why are you even the First Seat, anyway?"
"Because I am a far better chef and far smarter than you! Besides, I am also the Director of Tohtsuki, don't you forget it." Erina pointed her nose high and mighty like a princess who knew her place in the world.
"And yet you make Ojii-sama do all your work for you!"
"Because he wants me to have a good work-life balance! Ojii-sama is my interim director, and I do not make him do all my work! I work hard alongside him because, unlike you, HE KNOWS I'M RESPONSIBLE!"
"So?!"
"Soooo?!" They were at an impasse. Both girls shot steely glares and sharp tongues at each other, angry electricity charging between their eyes, both with puffy red faces and tightly crossed arms, unwittingly resembling each other like fraternal twins at that moment—rivals through and through.
But Erina was the one who broke the tension first, clenching her jaw, closing her eyes, and shaking her head like, 'Alice? What am I going to do with you?'
"Love me forever!" She smiled innocently. Her tone pivoted. "I just saying, Erina…"
Alice is finally also calm enough to sing her warning, "You should honestly grow a pair by now and tell him you're in love with him." Erina looked at Alice in shock at her implicit understanding of what was left unsaid. "I know that love is difficult for you to understand and all, but loving someone you date means that you're in love with them. And trust me, I know how you look and act around that boy."
"Not always." Erina dug her shoulders deeper into her pout. "Not for everyone."
"Whatever you say, Princess Erina-sama-"
"Thank you." Erina shouldn't have cut her off. She should have waited before appreciating Alice for anything.
"—Yukihira-kun," Alice teasingly sang. Not even in Alice above-average singing voice did that joke make Erina smile.
Anything at all. "Out of my room! Out. NOW!"
"There, there. Settle down now, you feisty little chihuahua, you."
"Are you just going to continue disrespecting me in my own room?" Erina's voice lowered as she looked the other way.
She doesn't know when it happened, but when Erina turned back to face her cousin, she saw the most sorrowful glimmer in the girl's typically dazzling scarlet eyes.
"Gotta say, though; I am a teensy bit jealous," the platinum-pixie scarlet lightly blushed, trying to hide her sadness behind a curled-up lip. Alice's smiles always reached the corners of her eyes. But right now, sitting in the afterglow of her cousin's happiness, she just didn't have the energy to try.
"…What?"
What was the point in hiding this pain from her only real girlfriend in Japan? Alice liked to believe that feelings were meant to be expressed because who can stop themselves from feeling them, anyway? Well, Erina likes to think she can, but Alice likes to tell herself that she's never wanted to be anything like Erina.
Maybe, until now. She let herself go.
"Alice?" Erina spoke again, alarmed at the girl before her.
Alice remained silent, except for the very quiet tremors moving frantically around her body. The sun was just past setting now, and the late evening's veil cast a ghostly shadow across her already too-pale face.
Erina didn't know what was going on on her bed. This was not like Alice. Erina tries hard not to overthink everything that's wrong with her family. But she knows that through it all, Alice has always been Alice. Alice was jovial and precocious, meddlesome and embarrassingly blunt, playful and loud. But, Alice also always had her back. Alice has always fought for their relationship, for their friendship. Alice wrote countless letters when she moved away even if Erina never got the chance to read a single sentence, Alice has never backed down from defending her to anyone, even Erina's father. And Alice never hesitated to share Auntie Leonora with her on Mother's Day in the absence of her own.
And even though Erina would have much preferred that Alice had just minded her friggin' business initially, Alice never stopped scheming to help Erina keep her haters-turned-lovers relationship with Yukihira on track— because Lord knows she wasn't able to do so on her own. There's a genuine possibility that she would not have even been with Yukihira if it had not been for Alice.
So, yeah, while Alice teased and annoyed and even humiliated Erina at length's end, Alice knew her for who she was, not what she was.
So, while it has been challenging being the Nakiri heiress, and never a relaxing day at the spa having the God Tongue, it rarely felt worth being born into generational fame and fortune. While Erina was the coldest bitch anyone would ever come across because of all her family trauma and prestige, she knew deep down to her bones that she was eternally grateful to have Alice in her life.
As a relative.
As a cousin.
As a rival.
As a peer.
As a (best) friend.
As a sister.
And so, Erina Nakiri, the Ice Queen herself, knew that whatever was affecting Alice this deeply was bad. So it was wrong and would be dealt with accordingly.
And so, Erina Nakiri, Miss "Tolerate-Zero-Nonsense-or-Disrespect" herself, vowed at that moment that whoever was the source of Alice's pain would feel the total weight of her wrath. Because Alice was to be protected, and Erina would protect Alice at all costs.
And Erina Nakiri never went back on her word.
"Alice, talk to me. I want to be here for you."
"He's…interested in someone else."
Erina's entire body felt like she had been dunked in a barrel of ice. Her throat sealed. Two names clashed in her mind like samurai swords engaged in battle.
"W-wh-who?"
Just as soon as she asked, Erina realized there was a third, an unknown name to be wary of. Her stomach churned in apprehension. But also, malevolent energy began to burn through the center of her chest. She quickly blinked to suppress her carnal readiness to know who would be her next kill. Whenever she felt herself morphing into her favorite hunter-shonen manga character, she knew it was a contract a victim who never knew they signed on the dotted line.
And the thing about Erina Nakiri, whoever was her prey, she devoured.
Oh well. She is an Aries, after all.
Her sniffle snaps Erina back to who matters the most right now.
"Alice? Who is interested in someone else?"
"Ryō." Her voice was so small and brittle that Erina almost didn't catch it.
It felt like the sun had begun to rise again. Her chest caved in relief—okay, she isn't talking about Yukihira—but only a little bit.
"Okay… can you give me a little bit more than that? Some context, if you will." Erina mentally slapped herself, hoping it didn't come out as impatient as she thought it was. For once, her intention was not to demand.
But Alice didn't seem to notice or to care. She took the deepest and longest sigh Erina had ever heard from her perfectly thin lips.
"It's Ryō, of course. He's…" she took deep breaths like she was whistling from a shooting pain before she could even continue speaking. Erina felt her heart slightly crack at the shallow and belabored hitches of Alice's breathing. "…been spending more of his free time away from me as of late. He takes any reason or chance he has to not be in my presence. Like," she sniffled a few times, "Take today, for instance. It's his birthday. His eighteenth birthday, and he's not even here!" Alice's pitch had kept rising as she cried until the last word was nothing more than a high-pitched wail.
Erina sighs in relief, releasing a breath she didn't even realize she was holding. Some of her feel foolish and even ashamed for daring to question Yukihira's intentions. Especially after their memorable day date, all planned by him, all intended for her. Then she sighs in sympathy. Of course, this is about Ryō. She rationalized, who else could it have ever been with Alice?
Though Erina definitely didn't keep track of the Danish-born aide's whereabouts whatsoever, she was well aware of his weekly standing Saturday food battles with Akira Hayama, but only because of Yukihira's boring and endless weekly match recaps. Honestly, she would roll her eyes at him; she could just read it in the next day's 'Toh Spo' if she really cared to know. It's not like there wasn't an entire weekly section of the school's daily newspaper dedicated solely to their matches.
Anyway, maybe that's why he wasn't with Alice today. But why wouldn't Alice have just gone to cheer him on? That's what she would typically do; it's what she always did.
But apart from that, Erina did know that today was Ryō's birthday— all birthdays of those living in the Nakiri residence were given in Hisako's daily morning report to her. So, why didn't Alice go today of all days? Where had her usual bubbly, upbeat, and embarrassingly shameless cousin gone because the girl currently sitting a foot away from her was not Alice?
Erina broke her concentration and allowed her gaze to roll onto her cousin. She hadn't known this distance was going on between them. She hadn't known Alice had been holding so much tension in her body. She hadn't even known Alice was capable of feeling anything but happy. She was usually—no—always cheerful and mischievous. But now? Her voice was just above a broken whisper. It reminded Erina of a still hollowed-out part of her own love story…
"H-h-he says they're 'just friends.' That they just have just enough things in common to have things to always talk about, but I'm his best friend! I know him better than anyone else! I know the truth! He's hiding something from me!"
Erina could not picture Ryō talking to anyone about anything other than cooking. She could barely recall a time hearing him speak longer than five seconds and more than four syllables and a few grunts. It's not like the boy was known for being gregarious or even approachable. However, his not saying anything to Alice made her stomach turn. What was going on? Had she really been this out of the loop of Alice's life?
A small judgmental voice reminds her of how much time she had spent with Yukihira since they confessed. She had been cherishing the love blooming strongly between them, making the last six months a whirlwind of the best emotions. She'd had the most fun she'd ever had in life and felt the safest she'd ever felt with someone not hired by or related to her. They'd had countless impulsive food wars that she always won, though she stopped calling his food outright disgusting after the hundredth; their weekly card game nights at Kyokusei Dormitory with the whole residential gang had turned nearly nightly wherever the two steal away to be alone in his room, together. She had to admit to herself—though she would never admit this to Hisako— her relationship with Sōma was the rawest, most profound friendship she'd ever known. But, come to think of it…
A sudden wave of guilt washed over Erina. She had been neglecting her very first friend.
Erina had placed the roses in her lap when they first settled on her bed, but now she gently placed them on her nightstand. Then it caught her eye— a golden Fabergé-style egg nestled in a triple leaf-encrusted base that matched her eyes; it was gorgeous sparkling under the dusty pink evening sun, and staring at it brought her back to when he placed it in her hands the day they became official. Six months ago, she was shocked he had even thought to pick something so beautiful and meaningful to their story (and honestly, since she knew luxury was too expensive for his wallet). It was the first gift he'd ever bought her as his girlfriend.
Now she stared at it, an elegant testimony of their hard-won love proudly perched beside the lovely bouquet's reaffirming promises six months later, sinking further into the tidal waves. Erina sat back on her bed, awkwardly wrapping her arms around her weeping cousin, deeply regretting sharing her joy.
Alice… She squeezed her a little tighter, but only just a little. Even though Erina was the younger of the two, their roles were always reversed for all familial and public intents and purposes. Tried as Alice did to be the mature one of the two only-child cousins, though she knew she was the more emotionally expressive and easily triggered of the two, it was Erina who always held everything together. Especially when Alice was the one falling apart.
Neither Nakiri cousin knew how much time had passed in their embrace, but a light rap at Erina's bedroom door pulled them out of their separate and shared griefs, slowly releasing them from their now very tight embrace.
"You may enter." Erina's voice was even and professional, not wanting to betray Alice's confidence by stirring unnecessary alarm or concern in the intruder. That is until she saw who was opening her door. Then Erina's entire façade turned stone cold.
"…Milady?" The hoarse and dejected voice rang through the silence. Its owner tentatively stepped through the slightly cracked doorframe.
"Kurokiba-san." The sting in Erina's "-san" made the usually dull and stoic aide (that is, when he's not wearing that flame bandana) dip his head somewhat lower than it usually drooped. His signature wavy front lock of black hair that always hung in his eye line slunk with him. Erina had never seen either of them look or act this way. So bleak. So distant. Yeah, she had definitely missed a lot.
Ryō looked up and met Erina glaring at him at the worst time. She eyed the forlorn teen, surveying him like he were her enemy and not the boy who had moved into her family home five years ago. No, worse— she looked at him like he was garbage served to her pure tongue.
Her stare pierced his gaze like she was raining iced daggers down in his direction. He shifted his center of gravity, clearly uncomfortable at their tension.
"She doesn't want to see you right now, Kurokiba-san." Erina eyed the transgressor, making it all the point to ensure he could not evade her cold glaring orbs. And, of course, he couldn't; he was pinned to her bedroom doorpost and in her family house ("house" used loosely).
Then something caught her attention. He was in his Tōtsuki uniform. But it was already well into Saturday evening. He just returned from a Shokugeki, right? …That's odd.
She instinctively rewound her arms, this time gripping them with possessive force, around a balled-up Alice. This time her hold was more sure and, for damn sure, more protective. Alice did not attempt to move or speak.
"You can leave now, Kurokiba-san."
"Milady! Please, let me explain!" Erina dismissed him, but everyone in the room knew he was talking to Alice. At that moment, Erina's eyebrows screwed up, threatening to slap the taste out his mouth by the look of how she slowly rolled her neck when he spoke but didn't move. He dared disobey her orders, to stay in her personal space, and plead to his mistress.
Yet, Erina held onto her steely frown for silent Alice's sake. She couldn't recall when she'd heard Ryō raise his voice above a grunt outside of a kitchen or Alice remained quiet for so long. As for the former, she was learning so many new things about the brawny boy's communication skills. As for the latter, she should've known she wouldn't need to wait too long.
"Leave me alone, Ryō!" Alice piped up, tears flowing anew, shaking a freed arm behind her to shoo him away before tucking her head deeper into her cousin's chest.
"Please, Milady Alice, I wish to speak to you."
"No!" Alice muffled out a pouty shout into Erina's chest.
"Oh, now you want to be formal and remember your place?" Erina crossed her arms severely and scowled. An almost imperceptible glint of irritation flashed across Ryō's red gaze at his mistress's younger cousin before quickly catching and recomposing himself, setting all of his attention on the only person he came to see's back.
"Alice," he said low and desperately. "Please… please talk to me for-"
Then, as if he had figured out a more persuasive approach, he swallowed his words, and Ryō would never admit this, but also his pride, and continued in a more desperate tone.
"Alice, I have something to say and wish you to hear it…Milady."
Erina's eyes bulged at the sudden switch and undeniably loving softness in his voice. She knew it well but certainly never out of Ryõ's mouth. He sounded like Sōma when he was apologizing to her.
Yes, it was official. Erina Nakiri had definitely missed every single sign between her cousin and her cousin's aide. When did this sudden shift in their dynamic happen! Erina's head darted to Alice, waiting to know if she was the only one confused and refusing to buy the boy's alleycat-comes-home vibes.
But Alice simply looked up at her cousin, peering into her stony violet glare. Their eyes connected, and it made Erina slightly uncomfortable to have Alice just staring at her, like that—the tension in her room was too unbearable for this to be a place of rest!—so she redirected her glare back on its object of ridicule.
Alice slowly looks over her shoulder, following the cold stare's line of sight until it falls on an utterly defeated Ryō. He was just leaning there, at the doorway, like his world was coming undone. A small smile slipped through her lips.
Effortlessly removing herself from her cousin's death grip, Alice sprang to her feet and crossed that wide bedroom floor in a single bound. "Okay, Ryō! Let's go!" She was back to her usual cheery voice like nothing was amiss, and she was inviting him to an amusement park ride.
The other two snapped surprised looks at the just-now crying daddy's little girl. She was bewildered. He was relieved— it worked.
"Alice…"
"It's okay, Erina. I'm all better now. Thanks for the talk, cuz." And sure enough, Alice looked exactly like her usual perky, mischievous personality. If Erina had not been with her the entire time, she would have never believed that Alice had shed a single long eyelash, let alone a solitary longing tear. Alice bounced and gave Erina a swift peck on her cheek before whispering in her ear.
"Truly. Thank you." She gave her cousin a warm squeeze and bounded out the door, dragging the long tail of her aide's tie behind her like a leash.
The aide in question willingly but, Erina noted, warily stumbled behind her—"Oh, and Kurokiba-san?" —until he froze. Ryō stood upright and slowly turned to face the heiress still sitting on the massive bed (much to Alice's pouty chagrin).
"…Yes, Milady?"
"Happy birthday."
The demure aide's red eyes flickered in embarrassment before returning dull, and then he gave a quick bow of thanks before shutting her door behind him.
What does Alice even see in that blockhead?
Erina took a long, deep breath. The sigh was of sadness and relief. All that blissful joy she felt surging through her? Gone. She no longer felt as light as the custom quill her boyfriend bought her as a because-you-sign-so-much-paperwork gift. But she did feel a small smile pulling the corners of her lips as she made her way to her adjoining bathroom. Might as well wash off the day and settle into the night. As she dragged her feet to turn on the tub's faucet, the sight of Ryō almost tripping over himself flashed across her mind and gave her great pleasure. She knew Alice. Alice could, and would, take care of herself.
Her mind lingered on Alice for a moment before gliding back to her favorite thought.
Sōma.
She was already missing Yukihira during whatever that was all about— though she would never tell him that or suffer a taunting worse than death (she'd rather not). Teasing notwithstanding, his presence gave her peace the once doom-and-gloom heiress struggled to explain. Explaining feelings was Alice's job, not hers. Though, Erina had to admit, she recognized that same pooling sense of peace in those scarlet eyes when Ryō said her name just before she bounded out of the door. Without thinking, Erina began her extensive nighttime bath routine.
She began arranging and lighting thick logs of warm vanilla candles before adding her favorite salted caramel and lavender-eucalyptus bath salts to the hot water. She liked the water to be hot enough to melt the knots in her back and calves but not boiling her skin off. She'd suffered enough during that battle in the inferno pool against Rindo-senpai as a first-year. Housekeeping had restocked her fresh red and pink rose petals, and as she scattered them into the rising basin, she considered playing some music— maybe the new playlist Yukihira made for her, "because every song on here makes me think of you." Erina blushed pink at hearing her unnervingly honest paramour's voice echo through her ears…sometimes he said things that made her feel like the main character of a shōjo. He was also tender with her and made her life with him feel like a dream.
But she completely forgot about the playlist. Instead, she drifted back to the first part of her day and into her original mood. As the water filled the basin and the salts fizzed in their boil, Erina began humming a childhood tune, went to her shōjo manga bookshelf, and picked up a new one that someone had loaned Hisako to give to her. It had come highly recommended by all of her favorite manga social media influencers. She was just getting around to reading it, and barring the whole Alice-Kurokiba incident mucking up her good mood; this bath was the perfect time to start.
She heard the water gushing like it was nearly full and remembered that she had gotten so swept up with Alice that she forgot to text him. She frolicked across the room to her bed, shocking herself that love was making her frolic in the first place, and swiped her phone. Nothing from Hisako, but that was to be expected until tomorrow morning's report.
But, he hadn't sent her anything either, which made her frown a little because it'd been at least an hour and a half since Yukihira dropped her off. He should've been back at his dorm by now. The bath water gurgling threatened to overflow, so her fingers flew.
Yukihira. You didn't even call or text to check on me?! What if I were in danger! ヽ(ಠ_ಠ)ノ
Also… I will not repeat this but… (thank you for tonight) xx
…you always know just what to do xx
With that sent, she sprinted to the bathroom just to find the tub's basin still fighting on her behalf, keeping the lapping water at bay. She sighed in relief that she would not have to call a maid to come to clean up the floor, thus further delaying her bath and manga time. Slipping into the steamy water, Erina immediately felt the tension of Alice's boy problems melting away. She felt so relaxed and so at peace within herself. Moments like this were when Erina was grateful for her life of luxury. Closing her eyes, she allowed the water and the contoured bathtub to slip her further under until her entire person was submerged.
Sōma-kun.
But something was not settling right within her. Something about what was going on between Alice and Kurokiba made her uneasy. Like she had seen this play out before.
She pushed her head above the still-hot water and sneezed out the water in her nose. The bath salts were working, so she leaned back and stared at the wall-length mirror. Wiping the hot water drenching her face and marveling at how her long golden tresses pooled around her floating body, she got distracted by the sight of her hair. It had gotten to the point where she could fully conceal her nudity under her hair. Suddenly surprised that she quickly forgot all about her bathtub reading plans, Erina grabbed the book on the bathtub's ledge and began to read, her mind never really drifting away from her original thoughts.
It started as a whimsical tale called "Entangled in Ships." It was a shōjo about a group of four pirates who were the best of friends going on fun seafaring adventures without a care in the world, until the main girl, timid Mayumi (a vein popped in Erina's mind), who is also the ship's navigator, falls in love with the ship's captain, daring Yuudai. Yuudai is also Mayumi's best friend and the only reason she's on their voyage at all, much to the bemusement of his longtime girlfriend and the ship's cook, sweet Sakura— though she respects the navigator's nautical skills. Sakura loves Yuudai with all her heart, and she shows it through her cooking though she can't share it with her words. Still, Yuudai knows, and he loves her more than he even loves his ship, The Fair Maiden. But Sakura doesn't know that the ship's master gunner and her boyfriend's rival-best friend, the tough Akako, is actually gunning (heh?) for the captain's seat and Sakura's heart.
As Erina read through the panels, she saw a certain longing in Mayumi's eyes that looked familiar, but maybe the panel artist was just really good at realistic art. Then she began to see the exact words and emotions from Mayumi that Alice expressed: "I know him better than anyone!" Then she began to see the exact words and sentiments from Sakura that Alice spoke: "He says they're just friends, but I know the truth!"
And all the longing, hurt, betrayal, and so much jealousy felt too relatable. Too real. Too close to home. Plus, there was so much crying. Like, there were six panels of Mayumi crying alone in her cabin over Yuudai and even two panels of Akako raging with tears over Sakura. It was all an unruly and dramatic mess.
And she could not put it down.
But as she continued to read, thoughts of Sōma, Alice, and even Ryō kept swirling in and out of her mind.
Mayumi cries into her already soaked pillow., longing for Yuudai. "I know him better than anyone!"
Is this how Alice feels?
"I can't bear how much she makes him happy in ways I can't dare to reach. I thought he was my best friend!" The navigator sobs, losing her way through tear-stained eyes.
Is that how Tadokoro-san felt?
Okay, now, why did she just come to mind? Erina's eyes flared at her reflection. Why would she, of all people, come to her mind while she was in her private time thinking about Sōma and shōjo? Erina's eyebrows automatically furrowed in annoyance at her brain.
Then, four cast iron skillets dropped on her head, one at a time.
Mayumi. Yuudai. Alice. Ryō.
Then four more dropped in succession.
Sakura. Yuudai. Her. Sōma.
Erina slammed the book shut and let it fall barely out of the tub (she had been successful, albeit careless). Her arms immediately fell limp at her sides, the splashing water serving as a slap in the face at the dots her meddling mind was seemingly connecting.
Erina kind of lost herself after that. She just stared at her reflection, not realizing when her consciousness drifted away, but after a while, all her senses dulled as her mind went blank.
Something froze, maybe time, maybe her. She could no longer feel the bath's steam misting her entire body, nor its dew drops camouflaging with the beads of sweat dotting her silken skin, but she suddenly felt hot…entirely too hot. And somewhere, tucked in a little chest rousing itself awake, rattling against its containment, she also felt a nasty heat.
Was it rage? What did she have to be this angry about? Was it shame? Had she done anything warranting it? She could feel her internal temperature rising and the irritation growing, growling to be unleashed.
And it was as if there only needed to be a simple unlatching of the beast from its cage; as she stared into the stoniness that only her deep purple eyes could hold, she blinked.
The latch clicked open.
Erina doesn't know when it happened, exactly, but when every gear assembled into its rightful place in her brain. Her personal bathroom's automatic exhaust fan clicked on, and the now rush of cool air was bringing her back to her senses, bringing her back to herself, leaving Erina to find hard violet eyes melting into soft amethyst ones staring right back at her in the mirror.
"I need to talk to Sōma!" She softly croaked, tears steadily streaming down her drained face.
A/N: if you're reading this, hello! I'm the cozy writer and this is the beginning of a larger, beautifully difficult story I want to tell in this Soma Yukihira Universe (the SYU, if you will). Ryō and I share the same birthday (HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO US, LEO GANG GANG!) So, it's only right to begin the story I'm creating in my corner of the world on 8.20, with love...but only if that is desired by you, the reader, now that you have finished ch/ep1. If you like/love what you read and I'll post chapter 2 next Saturday. If not, this can just be a one-shot with soooooo many loose ends waiting to be tied up. lol ;) so please leave comments, reviews; lmk if you liked what you read and/or if you'd like to read more (because goodness, is there so much more delicious drama to devour)!
-My pleasure! Hope you enjoyed!-
8.20withlove
Disclaimer: i do not own SnS :(
