Apologies for the slight cliffhanger and 3 month wait after the previous chapter. You'll soon see that it was only the start :) I am a couple chapters ahead now so will try to post with a bit more regularity - at least until this situation in the plot is resolved.
As always, I very much appreciate all reviews, follows, favourites, etc!
That evening, I am busy packing my bags. Madeline is very helpful, and insists I only bring with me what is absolutely necessary, and that she can send my other luggage after me. As the Gardiners cannot spare someone to accompany me on such short notice, and I am to travel post, it is better to travel light.
She also reminds me to write some notes to my London friends to explain my hasty departure. My explanation to Monsieur Breton is longer, as I want to keep working with him, and the only way I can is if we use the post. I know that he is very wary of having any correspondance intercepted. I suggest that I keep working on my side, starting off from where I remember, and I consult him with any questions I have, without revealing any secrets. I plan to return to London within the month - I just really need to be with my family right now. Madeline, sweet soul that she is, agrees that I should return soon. "Perhaps you might stay with us indefinitely," she even suggests. "You are so good with the children, and it truly is a delight to have you with us. Your mother and sisters could perhaps reside at Netherfield until we find them suitable accommodation."
I really love Madeline! It's such a relief to know I could be welcome here, where I spent such happy months!
On the carriage ride to Meryton, I reflect on what this will mean for me. I guess I will have to say my goodbyes to Longbourn for good, as Mr Collins strikes me as the resentful sort, and I did refuse him quite determinedly. I even ghosted his letters, although those blew over rather quickly - after three weeks he didn't send any more.
If our family can trespass on Jane's hospitality while we look for an appropriate place for Mrs Bennet, Kitty and Lydia to stay, I think we should be all right. I'm going to have to reign in Mrs Bennet quite a bit in her spending, but with only the three of them they should manage with a manservant and a maid of all work.
By the time I arrive, I have a good, simple plan of action in mind: pack our belongings (including father's books), hightail it to Netherfield, and reconvene. I hope Lizzie and Jane will be able to take some time from their husbands to help - and I hope they won't take this news too badly. Lizzie's reaction, especially, could be volatile. She and Mr Bennet definitely had a special kind of rapport - she's the only one of us who was even remotely interested in the classics, Mr Bennet's area of expertise, and I think Mr Bennet did enjoy having a bit of attention.
When I arrive, the house is silent. I head to my mother's room, and she tells me everything about how Mr Bennet was discovered (collapsed on his desk, his face on a book), how she has had to deal with everything herself as "Kitty and Lydia have been practically useless". I try to reassure her as best I can, but she keeps setting herself off, and after a few hours I start wondering if it was wise to go to her directly.
I'm saved by the dinner bell - she insists I go freshen up after my long travel, "especially as Mr Collins is here!"
I have to work really hard not to roll my eyes at that one. I'm pretty sure Mr Collins must hate me by now.
When I'm about to leave, after squeezing my mother's hand one last time, she looks at me with teary eyes and says "You're a good girl, Mary you'll do what's right," with a tremulous smile.
Now I'm getting worried for her.
As I head down to dinner, I'm intercepted by a harried looking Kitty. She hugs me hard. "Oh Mary, it is good you are finally here! Mr Collins is saying some very strange things, that he is our guardian now, and Mama has taken ill, and even about you! I don't know if he has the right of it or not, and he wanted a tour of the house to know what state it's in, and he wanted to see the ledgers - it's good that you're here!"
I blink, surprised. I wouldn't have expected Mr Collins to cause quite such a stir when he arrived barely a day ago.
"Come now, Kitty, everything will be fine. Let's take this one day at a time. Luckily we only have dinner left today."
She gives a weak laugh at that. Hooray!
Dinner is a strange affair. Mr Collins greets me with enthusiasm. I wouldn't have expected that from him after I refused him. He's calling me 'my dear' - is this really cousinly love? I'm too tired to get into the whole topic, although I'll probably have to set some boundaries tomorrow.
Kitty and especially Lydia don't seem too affected by our father's death. Mr Collins is - as always - in a talkative mood. His favourite topic is still Lady Catherine, who is very much the chorus of his song, but now he's added a small solo along the lines of 'oh now that I'm a landowner I'm not that far from her Ladyship's status and oh the responsibility for such an estate, this is a challenge indeed, and oh my poor cousins what shall I do with you and -'
Wait. Rewind that last bit. I start to really pay attention to what Collins is blathering on about.
"I am, after all, your legal guardian now your esteemed father has passed. I don't think it proper for me, a bachelor, to live with three unmarried young cousins in my house, with only your mother as chaperone. No, indeed. And, my dear Mary, your wishes were so clear in your last letters, I think you and I can only see things in one light. Certainly this is a period of mourning for you and your sisters, but with the banns already read, we may be married in a fortnight. That way, having my wife's two younger sisters and her mother residing in my residence is not an impropriety at all - indeed I believe it is natural and right."
Oh. My. God. I think my heart might just have stopped.
I don't even know what to tackle first: Mr Collins is not our guardian - is he? I need to ask Uncle Phillips. I did not send him letters, the plan is to go to Netherfield not stay in Longbourn, and why on Earth is he talking about marriage?
Lydia bursts out laughing. She really knows when to time her moments, that girl.
"Her face," she wheezes to Kitty, who I can see has absolutely no idea what to do with all this.
I rub the bridge of my nose. "Lydia, there is nothing funny here. Stop that. Mr Collins, I must admit my mind was wandering at first when you spoke. What letters?"
He turns to me with a curious look. "Why, the letters we have been exchanging since January, of course! At first I was worried you wouldn't answer, but your excellent mother assured me you only needed an assurance of my love, and after a few weeks you responded. I must say, I didn't expect you to be quite so… ardent in that last letter. But I agree with your plan wholeheartedly. We must marry. Thankfully the banns were first read before your father's tragic departure, so I think it not too improper to move forward with the wedding."
I turn to Kitty and Lydia. "The banns were read?"
They look confused. "We didn't go to church last Sunday - that was the day that Sally found Papa," Lydia explains, a bit more somberly. "But this is the first I'm hearing of this," she assures me.
"It is of no matter, anyway. Mr Collins, as always I am flattered by your attentions, but I will not marry you. My mother, sisters and I shall remove to Netherfield tomorrow so we do not disturb you in your new home. We shall have to find some sort of an agreement in order to separate what belongs to us or to the estate, but I'm sure with the help of our solicitor, we shall find common ground. As for our guardianship, as Kitty, Lydia and I are still under the age of 21, I'm sure that my father has planned for our Uncle Gardiner to take that office, or perhaps my brother Bingley."
"My dear cousin, you can't be serious!" Collins hit the table with his fist and stood. "I have some rather compromising letters written by your own hand, which prove that you wish for me to be your husband. You have suffered a great shock, perhaps you have forgotten. Here," he grabs a bunch of folios from his jacket and hands them to me. "To refresh your memory. I suggest you read them in your room tonight, and tomorrow morning I expect a better answer to my kind advances."
I've long thought Mr Collins a buffoon - before meeting him, even. This is the first time I'm a bit scared of him. During his last speech his voice raised gradually, and when he said his last word a bit of spittle flew from his mouth. Kitty and Lydia are equally cowed - Mr Bennet was never angry or loud, so this display is a first in our house.
"Very well. Thank you sir. Good night. Come on, Kitty, Lydia."
We all converge to my room. We settle on the bed. I'm trying to decipher the letters Collins gave me. I don't understand - these missives are signed by me, in my handwriting, but I certainly didn't write:
Oh, Mr Collins, how I regret that day in December when I refused you! I so long to see you again, your letters have made me quite fall in love with you. Please, I cannot bear to be separated from you for much longer, let's tell the world about our engagement! My mother can arrange for the banns to be read at church this Sunday, like we agreed. I cannot wait for the moment I shall see you again!
The rest is more of the same.
I look at the posting address - this letter is from a week ago, sent from Longbourn. Except I most certainly wasn't in Longbourn then.
"Kitty, Lydia, what do you make of this?"
Now that they've seen the letters, they can't just dismiss Collins as slightly touched in the head. He wasn't just spouting nonsense, he was led to believe that I returned his feelings. My prime suspect is currently sleeping in her room, but maybe - maybe - Kitty and Lydia thought this would be a fun prank?
The looks they give me - completely nonplussed - tells me they aren't the source of this.
"Good. Good," I mutter, as I rise and leave my room.
I burst into Mrs Bennet's. She is sleeping, but I don't care. I shake her awake.
"Wha - oh, Mary, there you are. Why did you wake me?"
I thrust the letters in her hands. "What is this?" I demand.
She looks at them, starts, then reads through a couple. Or pretends to.
She turns to me, beaming. "Oh, Mary, why didn't you tell me? With everything happening with your father, this is very good news indeed. We shall have to wait a few weeks for the wedding, but I'm sure Mr Collins won't mind. I -"
"No, Madam, this isn't good. Nothing in this whole situation is good!" I blurt out.
Mrs Bennet looks at me, mouth opened in shock. I've never raised my voice before. Maybe I should have. Maybe she wouldn't have thought this stupid, stupid ploy would work on me.
"I did not write those letters. And I refuse to stand by what was written in them. Who wrote them?" I grind out.
Mrs Bennet has regained her spirits somewhat. "How should I know? This is your handwriting, I should tell you off for writing such scandalous things," she demurs.
"They are addressed from Longbourn - I have been in London these past months. Did you write these letters?"
"How absurd! Why would I do such a thing? But I'm afraid you're quite stuck with Mr Collins now, my dear - the banns were read this Sunday at church. Mr Collins sent me a letter arranging the whole thing."
I see red. How dare she?
"And you didn't think to ask me? Why would you do such a terrible thing? You have ruined my reputation, and all for naught, because I swear that I will not marry Mr Collins!"
"Hush, girl, don't say such nonsense," she reprimands me, clearly not listening. "You must marry Mr Collins, especially now that your father is dead. Where shall we go if you do not marry?"
"To my Uncle, to Jane - hell, we could live somewhere else, anywhere else!"
"But it is so comfortable here," she complains. "I am close to all my friends. I don't wish to be a guest at my daughter's house."
"You have ruined my reputation, engaged me to Mr Collins without my consent, all so you could be comfortable? If you stayed here, you would be a guest in my home! And after what you've done, I don't want you as a guest of mine," I growl.
"Done? I haven't done anything," she protests weakly.
I scoff. "Really? You had them read the banns at church for a wedding I did not consent to! I'd say that's quite something!"
Mrs Bennet opens her mouth, probably to protest once more. I interrupt her. "Not one more word out of you. You disgust me. I refuse to see you ever again. Pack your belongings, we are going to Netherfield tomorrow."
I can't bring myself to look at Mrs Bennet's face as I leave.
Gaah! How is this happening?
