Please Don't Leave Me

Chapter Eleven

Buffy had avoided Spike at all costs for the last few days. It wasn't that she didn't enjoy their time together, she just didn't know if she was ready to face him and any feelings he might have on the situation. In all honesty she was scared, over the last few months they had become friends. She relied on him and he was really there for her, more so than anybody else since she had come back.

Tara had stopped by the Espresso Pump on her way back from class, Buffy had just finished her shift and popped a cup of coffee on the table in front of her and one for herself.

"Thanks for coming by" said Buffy sitting down across from her

"Is it bad?" Tara asked her

"I was sort of hoping you could tell me" said Buffy

"I knew this was gonna happen. What did Willow do now? Did she ... she hurt anyone?"

"Wha... uh, no, no, um... Ta-Tara, this isn't about Willow" said Buffy, fiddling with her hands

"I-I thought that's why you didn't want to meet at the house" said Tara

"Uh, sorry, it's, um ... Willow's fine, uh, she, she's been doing really well. You'd be proud of her" Buffy told her

"Good, that's ... that's good. So, so what do you want to talk about?" asked Tara

"It's me…" said Buffy softly

"What's going on?"

"I-I need to know about the spell. The one that ... brought me back. I, I'd ask Willow, but..." said Buffy

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know. I feel ... different. There are things... I don't have emotions… I mean I get angry sure, I can laugh but when it comes to…I-I think ... maybe ... I came back wrong" Buffy told her

"No, Buffy, that's n-not ... no. You didn't" Tara told her firmly

"Can you check out the spell? Just see if there's something that ... Could you just check? Please?" Buffy pleaded

Tara nodded

XXXXX

Buffy entered the house to find Xander and Dawn dancing in the middle of the room, while Anya and Willow sat on the couch watching.

"Are we singing again?" Buffy asked

"Nope, just the dancing" said Xander, spinning Dawn around again

"We're teaching Dawn perfectly synchronized dance steps for the wedding reception" Anya told her

Xander whirled Dawn around into a dip. She giggled delightedly.

"Wanna go for a spin?" Xander asked Buffy

"Uh, think I'm heading more towards an ungainly collapse" Buffy sighed

Buffy walked over and sat between Anya and Willow.

"Aw, rough day?" Willow asked

"Kinda" Buffy shrugged

"You've been going at it too hard, Buffy. We hardly ever see you, what with grinding beans and pounding the big evil" said Xander

"You are looking a little pounded…Just around the eyes" Anya told her

Buffy frowned clearly offended

"Hey, we're thinking of heading to the Bronze later. Wanna come, get all unwindy?" Asked Willow

"Tall glasses of frosty relaxation on me. Nectar of the working man" Xander smiled

"No, thanks. I think I'll stay here with Dawn…Curl up on the couch with a big bowl of popcorn and-"

A car honked outside and Dawn moved toward the door, picking up her jacket.

"...listen to the cars honk?…Where are you going?" She asked Dawn

"I'm ... sleeping over at Janice's?" said Dawn

"And I'm falling for that again because of the surprise lobotomy?" Buffy raised her eyebrows

"It's okay, I checked it out. Janice's mom is picking her up" Willow reassured her

"Oh"

"I didn't think you'd be good so early tonight, I thought you'd be patrolling with Spike" said Dawn

"Spike… he's not around" said Buffy "Can't you just stay at Janice's another night?"

"Her mom's cooking Mexican. She's gonna teach me how to make real tortillas" said Dawn

The horn honked again. Dawn grabbed her stuff and left.

XXXXX

Buffy decided to go to The Bronze after all, Xander and Anya were on the dance floor together swing-dancing as Willow and Buffy watched them in a state of confusion

"We're not going to have to do that at the wedding, are we? 'Cause there's this last thread of dignity I've been desperately clinging to" said Willow

"You're still doing okay, right?" Buffy asked

"Yeah. You know. Some days are harder than the really hard days. It's easier like this, though, when I'm not alone" Willow told her

"I'm sorry I haven't been around that much" said Buffy

"No, that's not…it's okay" Willow reassured her

Xander and Anya finally came back to the table

"Hey, I see sitting where there should be dancing" said Xander

"Come share in the joy of our groove thang" Anya smiled

"And despite that, I succumb to the beat" Willow smiled getting up to join them.

"I think I'll catch the next Soul Train out" said Buffy

"You sure?" Asked Xander

"Oh, yeah, you know" Buffy showed them her empty glass "glass all the way empty. More nectar required"

"Cool, well, shimmy on out when you're done lubricating" said Xander, following Willow and Anya back onto the dancefloor

Buffy smiled widely as she watched her friends

Buffy's smile slowly faded, she walked over to the bar and put her empty cup there and waited for the bartender for a moment before changing her mind. As she turned back around she walked right into Spike

"Oh… Hi" she greeted him

"Hello Buffy" he said softly

They stood awkwardly together for a moment

"So, you've not been around much" she told him

"Figured you didn't want me around after…" he shrugged

"That's not true" said Buffy

"Could've fooled me" he said angrily

"I'm sorry… I just…" Buffy faltered

"I get it, what we did was…" he also couldn't finish his sentence

Buffy looked at him, he looked so hurt by her actions the morning after. She wasn't an idiot she knew his feelings for her, she felt bad.

"It felt right" she told him

He looked surprised at her admission "It did?"

"I don't know what it means or even if it means anything" she said softly

"I'm not going anywhere" he smiled "We can figure this out"

"And what are we figuring out?" asked Xander coming up behind Buffy

Buffy turned round to face him "Uh Spike has some intel on a vampire nest… we were just figuring out a plan of attack, right Spike?"

Spike rolled his eyes "Yeah, what she said"

Buffy took Spike by the arm "So we'll just go and take care of that" said Buffy disappearing into the crowd and out of The Bronze with Spike

XXXXX

Buffy and Spike giggled as they walked through the cemetery hand in hand. When they heard the sound of a woman screaming, Buffy let go of Spike's hand and ran in the direction the noise came from

A woman was running away from the two figures figures chasing her. Buffy flies into the scene and tackles one of the figures to the floor. She fell onto the ground the figure disappearing beneath her. Buffy got to her feet and looked around.

"Huh?" Buffy frowned in confusion

Buffy heard a whooshing noise around her and the sound of a woman whimpering. Buffy turns to see a woman on the floor sobbing.

"It's okay. I'm going to get you out of here. Can, can you walk? Are you hurt?" Buffy called out to the woman

Buffy heard the whooshing noise again and the woman is gone. Quickly she hears a chorus of whispers

"What did you do? What did you do? Buffy... Buffy..." the voices chanted

Buffy put her hands over her ears, looking around anxiously.

"Ow!" said Spike suddenly laying on the ground in front of her with his lip bleeding

"Bloody hell, what'd you do that for?" He asked

"Spike?" Buffy panicked

The voices and the whooshing noise continued, Buffy was fighting a demon along side Spike one minute the next Spike was on the floor again in front of her.

Buffy was now attacking the demon again but ends up punching Spike instead. The woman ran past them again and laid down on the floor sobbing. Spike landed on his butt in front of Buffy, his lip bleeding again.

"Ow! Bloody hell, what'd you do that for?" He asked

Buffy stares in confusion.

The whooshing noise started again and Buffy swung for the demon but ended up swinging at empty air.

Whooshing noise. Something hit Buffy in the face again

Whooshing noise. Buffy held a dead demon in her arms.

Whooshing noise. The demon punched Buffy in the face, her head goes back, blurry.

Whooshing noise. A hand grabbed Buffy's shoulder and she whirled around, still in fight mode, backhanding the woman.

The woman went flying back and over the edge of a hill, falling to the ground and rolling down the hill. Buffy watched in horror, she ran down the hill after the woman

Spike straddled the demon and punches it. He started to get up. "Buffy!"

The demon grabbed Spike's jacket and pulled him back down. Now the demon is straddled Spike and tried to punch him.

"Do you mind?" Spike growled

Spike punched the demon so hard his fist went through its chest. Spike shoved the demon off him, he got to his feet and rushed down the hill after Buffy.

At the bottom Buffy is knelt beside the woman, just staring at her.

"Buffy?" Spike asked

"She's dead" Buffy said softly "I killed her"