Please Don't Leave Me
Chapter Twelve
Spike dragged Buffy away from the woman. Buffy was in a state of shock but he managed to get her home and put her into bed before he went back to the woods to dispose of the body.
There's no way he was losing Buffy over an accident like this, he grabbed the woman's body and decided to dump it in the river. It wasn't a bad idea, any prints that Buffy had left would be washed away so even if they did find the woman they wouldn't be able to link Buffy to the crime.
He got back to the Summers' house to find Buffy gone, he knew that she wouldn't be able to live with the guilt of what she had done. He knew she would've gone to the authorities so he headed for the police station.
He finally caught up to her in an alley across from Sunnydale PD
"What do you think you're doing?" He asked her
"The right thing. For once" she told him
Spike grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her back into the alley. Buffy struggled against him. He spun her around and threw her to the ground.
"Sorry, luv. Can't let you do that" he said
"I have to tell them what happened" Buffy argued
"Nothing happened" he told her
"I killed that girl"
"Demons in the woods? Time going wonky? They won't believe you" he told her
"I'll show them" Buffy said
"Show them what?" He said coolly
"What did you do?" Buffy said angrily
"I took care of it"
"What ... did you do?!" She yelled
"What I had to. I went back and I took care of it. It doesn't matter now. No one will ever find her" he said firmly
A couple of cops rushed by them, getting into a nearby police car
"Where'd they find her?" One of the cops asked
"The river. She washed up half a mile from the cemetery" the other cop told his partner
"Oh ... balls" Spike rolled his eyes "There still isn't anything to connect this to you"
"It doesn't matter"
"It wasn't your fault!" He argued
"I killed her!" Buffy yelled
Buffy walked towards the police station but Spike stood in front of her
"You're not going in there" he told her
"I have to do this. Just let me go" Buffy pleaded
"I can't. I love you" he told her
"No, you don't" Buffy cried
"You think I haven't tried not to?" He asked
"Try harder" she begged
She started to leave again but Spike is suddenly behind he. He grabbed her and pushes her farther up the alley.
"You are not throwing your life away over this" he told her
"It's not your choice" said Buffy
"Why are you doing this to yourself?" He asked
"A girl is dead because of me, Spike" she cried
"And how many people are alive because of you? How many have you saved? One dead girl doesn't tip the scale" he reminded her
"That's all it is to you, isn't it? Just another body!"
"Buffy-" he said "Please don't leave me"
"If you love me, just let me go" she pleaded with him.
He looked at her and watched as she walked into the police station.
Buffy walked inside and went over to the front desk, Spike burst through the door after her, trying not to bring attention to himself
"No, no statements. Not until I get confirmation" said the police officer on the phone
"Excuse me. I-I need to..." Buffy approached him
"Uh, I'll be with you in a sec" the officer responded
He pushed a button for another phone line "Sunnydale PD. Yeah, the phone's ringing off the hook here"
Buffy turned away, and saw Spike lingering at the door.
"Listen, you got an ID on that body yet? Yeah? Okay, shoot" said the officer writing down the information
"Katrina ... Silber. S-i-l-b-e-r"
Buffy's expression changed when she heard the name of the woman. She remembered Katrina was the ex girlfriend of Warren, he must have something to do with this.
Buffy backed away from the front desk and retreated outside, Spike was confused but followed her anyway.
"What is it luv?" He asked
"The girl, her name is Katrina… it's Warren's ex girlfriend. He has to have something to do with this" said Buffy
"I'm gunna kill him" said Spike
XXXXX
The next day Buffy called the gang in for research. Buffy needed to know what happened last night and why time was going all wonky to make her believe she killed Katrina.
Anya had found the demon relatively quickly she showed her a drawing of the demon
"Is this what you saw?" Anya asked
"Yeah, that's it" said Buffy
"Mm. The Rwasundi. Very rare. Um, its presence in our dimension causes a sort of ... localized temporal disturbance" Anya explained
"So that's why time went all David Lynch?" Buffy asked
"Right. Uh, human perception is based on a linear chronology. Being exposed to the Rwasundi for more than a few seconds can cause, uh, vivid hallucinations. And a slight tingly scalp" said Anya sitting beside her
"So that's it. These things just made you think you killed her" said Willow
"She was probably dead long before you stumbled across her" Xander told her
"It wasn't the demons. It was Warren. He knew Katrina. He had something to do with it, I know it" said Buffy
"How can you be sure?" asked Willow
"You always hurt the one you love" said Buffy looking over at Spike who looked away from her
"We need to find Warren, and the others. Whatever they've done, they're not gonna get away with it" said Buffy
XXXXX
"Are you sure?" Buffy asked
Tara had just got finished telling Buffy that the spell that brought her back was completely fine and that she should be back to normal
"I-I've double checked everything. There's nothing wrong with you" said Tara
"Then why do I feel this way?" Buffy asked
"Well, I said that there was nothing wrong with you, but ... you are different. Shifting you out of ... f-f-from where you were ... funneling your essence back into your body ... i-it, it altered you on a basic molecular level. But it's all just surfacey physical stuff. It wouldn't have any more effect than ... a bad sunburn" Tara told her
Buffy was close to tears "I didn't come back wrong?"
"No, you're the same Buffy" Tara smiled
"You must have missed something. Will you check again?" Buffy asked
"Buffy, I-I promise, there's nothing wrong with you" Tara tried to reassure her
"There has to be! This just can't be me, it isn't me…Why do I feel like this?"
"Like what Buffy?" Tara asks s
"Spike and I…" Buffy started
"Oh…Oh, huh. Really" Tara got it
"He's everything I hate. He's everything that ... I'm supposed to be against... Don't tell anyone, please" said Buffy
"I won't" Tara promised
"The way they would look at me ... I just couldn't..." Buffy cried
"I won't tell anyone. I wouldn't do that" Tara told her
"Do you love him?" Tara asked
Buffy stared at her with tears in her eyes, she couldn't answer. She didn't know if she did or not.
"I-It's okay if you do. He's done a lot of good, and, and he does love you. A-and Buffy, it's okay if you don't. You're going through a really hard time, and you're..."
"What? Using him? What's okay about that?" Buffy asked
"It's not that simple" said Tara
"It is! It's wrong. I'm wrong. Tell me that I'm wrong, please..." Buffy sobbed
She slid off the table onto the floor, she knelt down and put her her head in Tara's lap. Tara put her hands comfortingly on Buffy's head. Tara stroked her hair gently as she continued
crying.