Something red, moving so fast she couldn't get a good look at it and discern what it exactly was, yet it looked so familiar to her, so…
Rachel woke up, immediately hit with another splitting headache, her mouth dry, begging for some water. Still, she lay in bed for a little while longer, gathering herself, waiting till her heart would stop racing so much. She raised her hands and put them on her face, pressing onto her eyes in a hopeless gesture. Like every other night, the dream came back and just like always, she woke up with a headache, not knowing why she kept on seeing that weird red blur speeding, nor whether it was supposed to mean anything. Maybe she should take Caitlin up on her offer and get herself tested just in case, though the very thought of it awoke fear.
She glanced to the side where Harrison was still sleeping and then, she slipped out of bed and left the bedroom as quietly as she could. Most of the nights now she spent with him at his house and she guessed they were slowly getting to a point in which she would officially move in, leaving her own apartment behind. She considered it lucky that he never woke up when she had those weird dreams – she couldn't really call them nightmares since she wasn't scared, just frustrated.
As she left the room, she missed – like she always did all those little things known only to Wells alone – that he wasn't really sleeping, that he was just pretending, lying still and listening for any noise she made, any clue to what was happening within her mind.
She closed the door as gently as she could, then went down the stairs and straight to the kitchen, grabbing a glass and filling it with water before gulping it down right away. So thirsty she was that she immediately poured herself another one.
Sometimes she still had trouble believing that she'd ended up right here – in this fancy house, dating such an influential and rich man that was dr. Harrison Wells. Only that was, of course, not the reason. She simply loved him. When they'd met, she'd never expected that it would lead to this, but she was happy nevertheless. She'd found him attractive from the very first moment his eyes had laid upon her when Caitlin, out of all people, had introduced them. Sometimes Rachel wished her rejection of the other woman hadn't wounded Cait so badly that she'd started to feel embarrassed in her company, causing them to gradually drift apart. It was really a pity. She could only hope that now, when it was all water under the bridge, they could somehow try it again since she didn't really have any friends. Spending all her time with her nose in a book or writing would do that to a girl, though she still loved her inner world and the imagination she had and would never want it gone. It was a part of her no one would ever be able to take away, even if it came with a price. Then again, everything in life did, didn't it?
Still, at the very thought of imagination right now, she felt a pang of fear in her chest again, hoping that whatever was causing those migraines, it wasn't a tumor. Her worst fear ever was to lose her mind or have something wrong with it since it was the very source of her work, her favorite part of herself. She couldn't imagine losing it. What did one truly have without a healthy head…?
To push those disturbing thoughts away, Rachel checked her phone, idly scrolling through pages and social media until… She couldn't really believe it, but the news kept on reporting about some mysterious metahuman called the Streak who kept saving people in Central City. Streak… red streak… that sounded exactly like what she'd been dreaming about and what had been giving her such headaches recently…
She bit on her lip, thinking hard whether she should really visit S.T.A.R. Labs. If there was a place where she could get both the answer to who this metahuman could be and to what was happening with her health, it was there. There was still something else that was on her mind, a simple explanation to why this was happening to her, but for now, she pushed it away.
When Rachel met dr. Harrison Wells, never in her wildest dreams did she think this man would seek her out afterwards and ask her to have dinner with him. Few weeks later, love struck and settling into a relationship that happened very fast, she still had trouble believing it. Harrison Wells was not only an attractive man - a typical tall, dark and handsome - but also incredibly intelligent and it shocked her that despite the fact that they were very different; she a beginning writer of fiction, he a scientist with a clear vision of what he wanted to achieve - he still fell for her. She wasn't stupid, she did finish college and was quite eloquent, but that wasn't enough to even begin to understand his complicated physical equations and the blueprints of the particle accelerator itself. Still, he couldn't care less, in love with her and who she was. He was also supporting her in her career, never treating it as something that had any less meaning than his own. Yes, he was also significantly older than she was, but that was never really an issue. She wasn't scared of an age difference, she only cared about the connection. And they worked good together. She felt like her life had taken a turn for an incredible happy ending, almost like a fairy tale up until… the particle accelerator exploded, of course.
She was thinking about that fateful day again and the horror that followed while preparing coffee in the morning and waiting for Harrison to get ready for work.
He'd insisted she should be by his side at all times, even despite the lack of a degree and knowledge about the technicality of the whole enterprise. She'd done it all gladly, happy to be there for him while he'd been achieving his biggest career dream only to… hear a distant explosion and then, watching it all crumble to ruins.
Caitlin had lost her fiancé that night and even though they'd barely spoken at the time, Rachel had been so happy for her and relieved that they'd both found the right person. And then, Ronnie had died before even managing to marry Cait, all of their wedding plans lying in ruins; and Rachel had briefly lost Harrison in the crowd only to receive a phone call later on from the hospital that he'd been crashed by some falling rubbles. She'd felt like her entire world had just stopped, her breath suddenly becoming so loud to her ears, not to mention the thumping of her own heart. She'd been dangerously close to fainting, but needed to hold on because she'd needed to get to the hospital and see him. To make sure he would pull through.
There had been no one by her side that night and she'd so, so deeply wished she'd had a friend to talk to, to comfort her. Her lonely career hadn't been doing her any favors at the moment and she hadn't exactly met anyone through Harrison since he'd always been working. Calling Caitlin had been out of the question since she'd had it even worse… but Rachel had been sure Cisco had been by her side, which had given her a little bit of relief for the other woman.
At first, they'd told her that Harrison's spine had been crushed and he'd ended up paralyzed. She couldn't see him just yet as they'd been still conducting additional tests.
She'd been waiting for the news all alone, crying and shaking in a hospital hall for the most part of the night while listening to the horrible news about the tragedy and realizing that the ship the S.T.A.R. Labs had been, had been slowly sinking with its captain or his reputation alone. Either way, it hadn't been good. She'd prayed not to lose him. She just couldn't lose him. She'd needed him so much. They'd just barely started!
She'd felt a little better, relief washing over her when the doctor had updated her again hours later. She'd been standing there in her evening dress, shaking from the cold she'd stopped feeling a long time ago, hearing that Harrison would live, that his spine had been badly injured, yes, but he hadn't been completely paralyzed. His ability to walk would probably never come back, but he could still feel below the waist. Rachel had felt a little awkward hearing that assurance from the doctor. He'd known she was Harrison's girlfriend, so he'd wanted to give her as much good news as possible, but she'd just felt awkward and wanted him to finally leave and tell her where the man she loved was, so she could go see him.
And once she had, she'd gone straight to his bed and laid down by his side, sobbing into his neck while clinging to his body. His eyes had been open, directed at the window from which he could still see the smoke hovering over the Labs, from where he could see his dreams evaporating with it.
He'd never talked to her about the accident and the implications of it, never asked her whether she would stay or leave. The wheelchair had appeared in their life and never left and that was it.
She was still there, for good and for bad because she simply loved him. Because he was all she had and she didn't want to lose him and wind up all alone. Because they needed each other.
He never let her help him in any way either. He handled it all alone and in silence, taking lots and lots of time to himself and she let him. She made sure he knew she would always be there and if he needed anything, it was enough to say a word, but beside that, she didn't push. During the time right after the accident, she'd found herself typing all of her emotions, all her love, loneliness and fear into her laptop, creating her first book and getting it published almost immediately. She'd never asked him whether he'd helped a bit with that, having an inkling he'd had, but just letting it go. Her work had received positive reviews and people had loved it, therefore she hadn't felt like a fraud.
Now she needed to come up with the next one. Or maybe make some friends and finally live her life. Or both. She needed inspiration and she knew where she could find it. She also knew what she needed to do regarding her headaches.
She really intended to go to S.T.A.R. Labs to see Caitlin, she did.
Only then, she let herself watch Harrison leave the house in favor of work after kissing her goodbye. And she didn't say anything. She just stood there, biting her lip, letting fear win over and choosing blissful ignorance that she knew wasn't much better.
After that, she was sitting in front of her laptop, staring at a blank page and the flickering cursor, coming up with absolutely nothing and deep down inside knowing exactly why. So, she eventually sighed, then dressed up, grabbed her purse and left the house.
She meant to go straight to the Labs and find out the truth, but instead she made a detour for the Jitters, tempted by the sudden urge to order her favorite cappuccino. No one made it as good as the Jitters and she couldn't possibly resist, making a mental note to herself to pick up Harrison's favorite as well.
The moment she crossed the coffee house threshold, she walked straight into no one else but Barry Allen talking to a pretty barista.
He noticed her immediately as though he was bound to look at the door the moment she walked in and their eyes met, a smile forming on his face.
"Rachel!" He waved at her, somehow seeming relieved, which made her think that the conversation he was having was not a good one.
"Hi, Barry." She came over and then took a closer look at the other woman.
"This is Iris, Joe's daughter. You know, Joe is my adoptive father," Barry explained.
"Oh, hi! It's nice to meet you." Rachel reached her hand out to shake Iris's, a big friendly smile on her face. Then something rang a bell… "Wait a second… I think I was just reading your blog last night! You're reporting on the Streak, aren't you?"
"Yes, I am! Thank you for the recognition!" Iris lit up instantly, shooting Barry a meaningful look that Rachel couldn't really decipher. "I'm studying journalism," she then informed.
"That's great! I studied English Literature and not so long ago published my first book. I'm currently doing research to find inspiration for my second and I'd love to read more of your blog. Who knows, maybe the right idea will come to my head then!"
Suddenly, Iris's whole attitude changed, taking Rachel aback.
"You know what, Rachel? Some of us are actually writing about facts, not fiction," she threw her way, shot Barry one last look and walked away.
"Um… What did I say?" Rachel turned to Barry, feeling completely perplexed by the way she was just now treated. "I didn't mean that I'd steal what she wrote and make it into a…"
Barry waved his hand at that.
"Don't worry. It wasn't anything you said. It's she who should feel ashamed. That's not the way to treat people." He sighed and shook his head. "The thing is, that ever since Iris created that blog and then signed her name to it… we've been afraid with Joe that it would only lead her into trouble. By this constant writing about the Streak, she'll be the first person the enemies of this guy will turn to."
Rachel nodded, pursing her lips. "I can see your point," she then slowly admitted.
"You said you wrote a book? That's so cool! I didn't know that. Can you tell me more about it?" Barry immediately followed with. "Do you maybe want to get a table? Or are you in a hurry?"
She smiled, welcoming the distraction that postponed her inevitable visit to the Labs.
"I just said I'm on the lookout for inspiration, so no, Barry, I am absolutely not busy. Only not sure if I should go out there and place an order. Iris won't be happy to see me."
"Well, then that's going to be an extremely bad customer service. Let me get you something. You just grab a table. What would you like to drink?"
"Cappuccino, please."
Once Barry returned with two steaming cups, Rachel thanked him and then asked, "Has she cooled down yet?"
"Don't worry about Iris, really," he assured her when taking a seat himself. "She's been having a really rough time recently. She and I both, actually. And it doesn't help that we don't exactly see eye to eye right now. Usually, Iris is supernice, but as you can see, she's very sensitive and protective about her blog at the moment. Anyways, what brings you to Jitters? Just the coffee? Can't blame you, it's the best."
Rachel smiled, taking an instant liking to him. Barry was extremely easy to talk to and making her feel absolutely comfortable, which was hard when it came to people. Only a handful could do that and even Harrison hadn't when they'd first met. In fact, she'd felt very intimidated by him and hyperventilated when he'd reached out later to ask her out. Of course, she'd been happy, but it'd taken some serious ice warming for her all the same.
"Um…" She cleared her throat, playing with her glass. "I was actually on my way to S.T.A.R. Labs and I made a detour."
"You wanted to see dr. Wells?"
"Actually… I wanted to see Caitlin."
Barry's eyes grew bigger when she said that and she shot him a suspicious look.
"What exactly did she tell you?"
"Um… nothing… just… just that she tried… you know," Barry sputtered, clearly embarrassed. "I'm sorry. It's none of my business."
"It was ages ago." Rachel dismissed that quickly. "I'm happy with Harrison and I was also so happy that Caitlin found Ronnie. And I feel so sorry now that he…" She couldn't even say it out loud because the very thought of losing someone you loved that way… She'd come so close to that herself.
"Yes. I know how awfully tragic losing someone is," Barry admitted.
"Have you…?" Rachel started, but wasn't sure she should pry.
"My mother. Actually… when I was eleven, I saw this… I can only describe it as a huge ball of lightning in our living room… Then, I was suddenly on the street far away from the house whereas… whereas that… thing… killed my mother and my father was accused of the murder because no one believed me. I was just a kid, after all."
Rachel was speechless for a moment, then she finally said, "My god, Barry, I am so, so sorry."
"Thank you. You know… there are so many metahumans in the city now… it makes me think that whatever I saw… it must've had something to do with it. That maybe I can exonerate my dad."
"I really, really hope you can." There was nothing but honesty in her voice.
Barry was looking at her for a moment and she felt a bit uncomfortable under the scrutiny of his gaze.
"What is it?" she eventually asked.
"Oh, sorry… nothing… It's just… you so easily assumed I was telling you the truth. That means a lot to me."
"We've seen our own share of crazy in this town, haven't we? If both you and your dad say it happened, then it happened." She thought about her weird dreams and flashes about a… well, a flash. Could that somehow be related?
"So, why did you hope to see Caitlin?" Barry then followed up on, reminding her why they were talking about this in the first place.
"I… I was going to take her up on her offer of checking my head," Rachel eventually confessed.
"Are you having those headaches again?" There was true care in Barry's voice as though he was really worried about her. It meant a lot to her, showing her how emphatic he was.
"I just…" she trailed off and then shook her head. "I don't really want to talk about this right now. I need to see Caitlin first."
"Of course. We can walk there together if you want. I was just on my way anyway."
"Why are you spending so much time in the Labs? Are you helping them?"
Barry hesitated before answering the question, "I'm a CSI. They need my consultation from time to time."
"Well, let's go, then!"
The short way from the Jitters to the Labs alongside Barry was very pleasant for Rachel and she almost forgot about the upcoming conversation she would have to have with Caitlin. There were only two ways this could go and she wasn't sure she liked either. Still, one alternative was definitely better than the other.
"Do you want to say hi to dr. Wells first?" Barry asked Rachel when they exited the elevator on the right floor, him clearly heading to the cortex where the team was. It felt so weird for them all to refer to Harrison as dr. Wells and making him feel older than he actually was. Then again, he did carry an air of authority around himself and was not so easy going as to tell everyone to be on the first name basis with him. Scientific environment required a lot of respect, probably because the title was so hard to achieve in such a difficult major.
Rachel hadn't talked to Harrison in the morning about her possible trip to the Labs and wasn't going to now either. She didn't need more worry or uncomfortable questions. She'd rather just talk to Caitlin first.
"Later. I go straight to Caitlin's lab. Just do me a favor and if you see her in the cortex, send her after me, ok?"
"You got it!" Barry waved her temporary goodbye, but then he turned to her again. "Rachel?"
"Yes?" She turned around as well.
"I hope everything's going to be all right and you'll hear the answer you want to hear in there."
She smiled, really touched by the way he cared and the consideration.
"Thanks, Barry."
Caitlin was in her lab, currently looking at something under the microscope and Rachel knocked on the open door before coming in.
Still, the moment she spoke the other woman's name, Cait jumped, releasing a little squeak.
"I'm sorry, I didn't expect you," she then quickly explained, her cheeks burning crimson. "What brings you here?"
"Caitlin," Rachel started, her voice a bit worried, "are you ok? Are… we ok?" The last thing she wanted was for the awkwardness to continue and get worse.
"Yes, of course… It's just…" Cait hesitated, for a moment avoiding Rachel's eyes. "It's a bit awkward, is all."
"Please, don't feel this way," Rachel assured her. "It's all good. I promise. It always was, soo… um… Can we… just be friends? Do you think we can still manage that?"
To her relief, Caitlin smiled warmly, though she remained a bit nervous.
"Yes. I would really like that. I read your book, by the way, and I loved it. Looking forward to what you're going to write next."
"Thank you. To be honest, I'm on the lookout for some inspiration."
"And that brings you to S.T.A.R. Labs?" Caitlin asked in surprise.
"More like… I would like to take you upon your offer. You know, the last time we saw each other... My headaches are not getting any better and…" she broke off, not knowing how to follow up on that.
"You really are afraid, aren't you?" There was care in Caitlin's voice.
Rachel took a deep breath and finally said it for the first time aloud, "I think I might be a meta."
There was a short moment of silence before the other woman responded with, "Ok. What kind of a meta?"
"Aren't you afraid?" Rachel asked instead. "So far, there's been so many of them… and all of them bad. All of them had to be stopped. I don't… I don't want to end up like this, Caitlin. And it's either this or having a tumor in my head, which…" She had to look aside, tears glistening in her eyes.
"Have you talked to dr. Wells about it?"
She shook her head again.
"He's hunting metas, trying to fix his mistakes. How can I tell him that the woman he's in a relationship with may be one of them? I mean, sure, it was bound to happen. I was here when the accelerator exploded."
"Rachel," Caitlin went over to the other woman and placed her hands on her shoulders. "He will not look at you any differently. Metahumans aren't all bad. We also know pretty good ones that do a lot for this city. True, we lost one recently, but it was only because her powers quite literally made her into a ticking bomb."
"I have… flashes in my mind like… visions, but they're over too fast for me to tell what it really is. I have no way of knowing whether it'll stay this way or… or I can somehow hold it for a moment longer to discern what they mean… So far," Rachel met Caitlin's eyes, "I saw a blur. Red blur speeding so fast I felt dizzy and it's always followed by a headache. And last night, I saw the news articles about the Streak. I think that's what I'm seeing, Cait."
Now it was Caitlin's mind that was speeding, thinking hard… thinking back to the day she'd faced Rachel again, to the day Barry had met her and just as she'd shaken his hand, she'd gotten a terrible headache. That had been the moment Caitlin had noticed something was wrong and offered help.
"I'm going to test you for the metahuman gene and I am going to take a look at your brain scan. What I am going to do after is talk to someone and you will have to wait. Please, Rachel, you need to promise me that you will wait and trust me because… I think I know what's going on with you."
Rachel was a bit confused, but did agree to Caitlin's terms. After all, the woman would test her immediately and give her the news she so desperately needed, even if she also dreaded it.
Rachel had already been waiting for a good portion of twenty minutes when sitting on a cot in Cait's lab, the woman still not back. The tests had all been done, but she hadn't heard anything so far and she was getting a little impatient. She wondered why Caitlin needed to talk to someone first and what the big secret was all about.
Finally, when it got close to half an hour, Caitlin finally came back and gestured for Rachel to come along. She led her straight to the cortex where Harrison, Barry and Cisco were waiting.
"Um… hi, everyone," Rachel waved at them, a bit unsure of what was happening. She had heard Caitlin when the woman had mentioned the good metahumans, but somehow she still dreaded that they would feel threatened and would try to lock her up somewhere if she turned out to be one.
"I'm sorry for all the waiting, I truly am," Cait started when standing somewhere in the middle, separating Rachel from the rest, "but before I could tell you what I really wanted to, I needed to ask someone's permission first since it wasn't my secret to tell. To start… yes, Rachel, you have the metahuman gene. We also think your powers will manifest more with time. How do we know that? From experience."
Rachel looked at Harrison, but his expression told her absolutely nothing. He was merely an observer, not shocked nor worried about the news about her powers. Maybe he wasn't used to showing any kind of emotions among other people or maybe he'd already suspected something since she'd been by his side that fateful and horrible night.
To her surprise, it was Barry who spoke.
"That secret is mine."
"Wait… are you…?" Rachel pointed at him. "You're a meta?"
"Not just a meta… Um… It may be better if I show you…." In one moment, he was there and in the next, was gone, just to… be back, but… dressed up in a suit.
Rachel's mouth flew open. "You're the Streak?!" she gasped.
"I don't really like that name," he commented.
"Oh, wow! That is… Au!" She pressed her hands to her head, hit with particularly nasty pain. "Oh god! There's this flash again…" She frowned.
Barry was by her side in no time, holding her up and leading her to a chair and then Cisco was offering her a glass of water.
She accepted it with gratitude and drunk a lot, hoping for her headache to subside at least a little.
"We've got to do something about those headaches," Caitlin said. "I'm gonna hit the lab right away. Maybe I can come up with some kind of a serum…"
"Flash…" Barry murmured under his breath, both him and the rest of the team oblivious to the way dr. Wells was watching them.
"Was it just Barry so far or have you seen any other metas?" Harrison asked when finally driving his wheelchair over to his girlfriend.
"Just Barry, though when we started hearing about the metas on the news, I had crazy dreams that I could never remember… Weird shapes…" Rachel shook her head and frowned, not able to make any sense out of them. "And headaches. Lots of headaches. Is this… Is this dangerous? What I have?" She then turned to Caitlin. "Is my brain ok?"
"Yes. The scan came out clean."
"At least that's a relief."
"Well, it's certainly going to be interesting," Harrison commented.