Chapter 259: The Sole Purpose.
"All they could do was smile at each other and laugh awkwardly. They were REALLY bad at this romance thing. But that didn't matter to them at all."
-Frankie_the_Eccentric, The Whispangle Kiss
Meanwhile, at the top of the Down, there was a minor argument about who would take part in Dandelion's rescue mission. Bigwig quickly refused to take part, as he felt he would be more useful leading an assault should the rescue fail. He also forbade most of his owsla from joining the rescue group for the same reason. Some of them protested at this elimination, which they considered unfair; the discussion led to delays in starting the rescue, until Acacia announced that he and Hawkbit would be going. By this point, with time running out, and nobody wanting to argue anymore, Hazel formally tasked them with bringing Dandelion back.
Before setting off, the two rabbits looked at the area from a distance, to see what would be the best angle to approach the crowd without being detected. Acacia in particular seemed excited at the upcoming mission.
-"WOOHOO LET'S GO GO GO!"
-"All right, no need to sound like a mini-Bigwig," Hawkbit grumbled.
-"You're so cute when you're grumpy." Acacia gave a small kiss to Hawkbit's forehead, leading to blushing.
-"Hmm. You don't have to give me so many kisses, and so enthusiastically. We're not a couple like Bluebell and Blackberry, or Hazel and Primrose."
-"It's what you need, it's what you deserve. I don't mind filling you with love. But I can stop if you want."
-"No, no, please continue. It's just that I'm not used to so much affection from someone. Especially someone I only met so recently."
-"There is nothing wrong, I'm on your side. We are on the same team."
-"I guess so. But now we need to go with the rescue, Moss may not hold on much longer."
-"Later, after Dandelion is safe, you can return the favour and fill me with kisses if you want, I would like."
Hawkbit chuckled.
-"Why not?"
The Speaker of the Past was staring at Moss, Vervain, Orchis and Aspen as they had their discussion. Coltsfoot was sitting next to her, alternating between looking at her and those she was looking at. She knew what was happening. Due to her distance, she could not hear all that they were saying, but she could still feel every word. Sensing the disturbance in Moss' mind, as well as the conversation reaching its natural conclusion, she turned to her student.
-"This is the moment I have been training you for."
Coltsfoot was taken aback by the sudden important words.
-"It's time?"
-"It is. You know how this invasion is against the law?"
-"General Woundwort tries to justify it, but you taught me. It is very illegal."
-"They are running out of things to say. It is up to you to save the future and uphold the law."
Coltsfoot recognized the gravity of the situation. However, as the Speaker herself usually handled important missions in the past, now that it was his turn, he was at a loss.
-"What should I do?"
-"You shall have to tell them the story of the branches and spooks."
Coltsfoot shuddered at the mention of this unfortunate tale.
-"Perhaps not that one..."
-"I am afraid so. It must be that one. The disturbance must reach the appropriate amount of time."
-"I really don't like this story...why can't you tell it?"
-"My time here is not long. You are my student, my successor, the worthy one. It is your duty to take over."
Still, Coltsfoot was hesitating. He had always wanted to do something important; and yet, now that he had the opportunity, he would rather not. But, as he thought about it, he came to the conclusion that, as painful as it would be, he would have to do it. He would have to sacrifice his sanity to save everyone else.
-"I'll do my best."
-"I know. Now hurry."
Coltsfoot hurried, running across the crowd of sleeping Darkhaveners. In his rush to get to the spot where Moss and the others were sitting, however, he tripped on one of the sleeping rabbit's paws. Losing his balance, he tumbled until he landed on his back. By that point, however, he had successfully reached his destination. Moss, Vervain, Orchis and all the others were looking at him in confusion. Not wasting a moment, he quickly got to work "saving the future".
-"How would you all like to hear a story?"
-"Uh..."
-"Excellent!" Coltsfoot had not waited for an answer before beginning. "Just a moment, while I take my position..."
He rolled back on his paws and sniffed the ground, searching for the best spot to sit. He eventually settled on a small anthill; while he was smaller than the others, this spot made him look about as tall as they were.
-"Who's this fool?" Vervain whispered in Moss' ear. "Is he one of yours?"
-"I've never seen him before in my life," Moss replied honestly.
-"I wonder what kind of story he has to tell," Orchis said. "You see, I fancy myself as a storyteller and..."
-"Shut up, how can we listen to him if you're talking over him?" Vervain whined.
-"Right, the story." Coltsfoot hesitated a bit, but soon began. "First, first, you need some context. Something about humans. There is something different in the way they eat their food. You see, when us rabbits eat, we just take a bite, chew, swallow. Sounds about right? Elil do the same. But humans don't. You see, they expose their food to an intense fire, or another source of heat, before eating it. This is called 'cooking'. Now that you have the context, let's get to the story itself." He hesitated. "Actually wait, you still need more context. One of the methods of cooking involves putting the food on a stick, and then rotating the stick over the fire so that the food cooks equally on all sides. But what if...what...the food...was..." Coltsfoot's voice was quivering, he was struggling to utter these words, before he finally gave up. "No, I can't, I just can't! I hate sad stories, all they do is remind me of the tragedy of existence..." As he thought back at his teacher's words, and how this was his duty, he gathered his composure once again. "How about a story of El-ahrairah? How does that sound? Everyone loves El-ahrairah! Right?"
-"Not everyone," Vervain whispered in Orchis' ear. "While I was out on my grand adventure, I met this weirdo called Inqwynn..."
-"I'm sure it's fascinating, but I want to hear what he has to say about El-ahrairah," Orchis replied.
-"So, El-ahrairah," Coltsfoot started. "Once..."
-"Remember!" came the distant voice of the Speaker.
Coltsfoot cringed: the Speaker's words were a signal to tell a specific El-ahrairah story, and it was not a pleasant one.
-"I know why he's weird," Vervain whispered in Moss' ear. "That doe who just yelled at him, she's the weirdest I have ever met. If he's friends with her, he is likely just as insane."
-"Oh," Moss replied simply. He was not sure what to make of the situation (Vervain calling someone "insane" did not necessarily mean much), but if this El-ahrairah story, whatever it may involve, kept everyone distracted a bit longer, that would be wonderful.
Moss was so absorbed in his thoughts, however, that he missed the beginning of the story, and only caught up a few sentences later.
-"But it's not about Rabscuttle. It's about another rabbit in his warren...ack what is his name already? Oh no, I forgot an important detail at the worst possible time. I always remembered during practice, but now that it's time to save the world, I'm drawing a blank...anyway never mind his name. There was something that set him apart, it was his fur: it was purple. And our purple protagonist found himself in a perilous predicament!"
Moss was unsure what to make of this: the only purple rabbit he knew was Spartina. Surely this story wasn't about her, was it? As he looked around, however, he saw that he was not the only Watershipper present: a pair of them were carefully hopping towards Dandelion. He instantly figured out what was happening: since Dandelion clearly wasn't moving on his own, it made sense that they would go after him.
Moss kept an eye on the rescue, hoping everything would go well, and that captains Vervain and Orchis would be too distracted by Coltsfoot's weird story to notice. Dandelion opened his mouth, as if he were about to speak, but Hawkbit smacked him in the face first, keeping him quiet. Then came the hard task of scooping him up. Acacia placed his head under Dandelion's; Hawkbit, meanwhile, handled the dangling hind legs. It was a very precarious situation, but eventually Dandelion was on the two rabbits' backs, at which point they were able to hop away back to their warren, slowly but surely.
Once they were out of view, Moss could not repress a grin. He had done it, he had successfully stalled the Darkhaveners long enough for Dandelion to be taken away. His job was now complete. However, he did not want to leave right away: he would at least stay until the end of Coltsfoot's story. Assuming he could understand the ending, as he had missed most of it while he was quietly supervising the rescue. He could hear what captains Vervain and Orchis were thinking, and it wasn't positive.
-"He's doing a really poor job," Orchis whispered in Vervain's ear. "He's not supposed to break character to apologize to his audience. I think he's just too nice to be portraying such villains."
-"THAT's what catches your attention?" Vervain retorted. "Have you not heard the rest of the story? What kind of twisted mind would come up with ideas like this?"
-"I don't mind dark stories," Aspen said. "Suffering leads to growth, one can learn from it. But this sounds like pure sadism, death just for the sake of it."
-"You said it yourself, Vervain: he's friends with the Speaker," Orchis recalled. "Should it really be surprising?"
-"Still, this is insane, even by her standards."
-"...and so the story ends unhappily. I'm sorry you had to hear that." By this point, Coltsfoot was crying, telling this story had been a highly unpleasant experience of him.