Ugly Ducklings

Joann Hartwick Maternal Grandmother POV

I knew from the beginning the kids would be more focused on material things and money instead of being kind and helping others. It wasn't as obvious when they were really young, because a lot of kids are learning the process of sharing and accepting each other's differences and playing well with others. We noticed that Veronica did show signs of being possessive of things. She always took but never gave back. When she wanted something she took it, not caring who got hurt in the end. In the beginning it was small things like toys or food. She was extremely jealous and didn't want anyone to have anything better than she had. She wanted everything. We spent a lot of time apologizing for her behavior and righting the wrongs she did. It was frustrating and embarrassing, to say the least.

The older she got, the worse she became. She treated everyone like they were beneath her and should be thankful she let them be around her. She was always too focused on being popular and having everyone worship her. The allowance we gave her she used to buy attention from her classmates, she tried to call them her friends but she never really had any. The people she considered her friends were just riding her coattails to enjoy the money she spent on them. No matter what we did we were not able to change their thinking.

I don't think Veronica ever found happiness in family or friends. I take that back. Her brother Bruce and her have always been super close. She never found fault in anything he did, no matter what it was. It's like they worshipped each other. Not in an improper way but it is unsettling. I'm pretty sure Bruce worshipped Veronica because she would give him money whenever he needed or asked for it. I guess it's not too hard to see from that perspective, but I can't imagine how it would be that Veronica thought everything Bruce did was good. He blew through his allowance on partying, drinking, drugs and who knows what other illicit things he got himself into. Preston and our attorney were always going down to the police station to get him out of his messes, without alerting the public or media. He was quite the embarrassment.

We tried to make them "earn" their allowance by having them do charity functions and be stand-out citizens donating time and money to the greater cause. Unfortunately, that didn't work the way we intended. Veronica would show up to make her appearance and do nothing to help. Preston insisted on giving them an allowance. I can remember the endless conversations between the two of us. I've never been so frustrated with him in my life but he did make some valid points, but they always ended on the same note.

"Preston, why do you insist on continuing to provide money for Veronica and Bruce? All you're doing is adding fuel to the fire and they're learning that you're willing to give them anything they want, even if they fail to do the things we ask of them. They just go through the motions to appease us knowing you'll give them what they want anyway. It's frustrating." Crossing my arms over my chest, I let out a frustrated huff.

Preston looks at me and sighs, "Joann, I agree with you one hundred percent. Our kids are selfish and spoiled. We've tried whatever we could to make sure they were raised right, and to some point we were successful in that. Unfortunately, no matter what we do to change their way of thinking, it seems to fall on deaf ears." Disappointment weighs heavily in his eyes when he looks at me. "However, they are our children and in a way, we created this monster of materialization and selfishness. I feel it's my responsibility to make sure they are taken care of. We've already set up their trusts, maximum of $5 million dollars each with a stipulation that they can't access those funds before turning twenty-one. That's a start."

Sighing, I shake my head. "Yes, I guess that is a start. We'll be done with their allowance considering they will have their trust and we'll be done with that responsibility. Veronica is just going to have to get a job if she runs out of money. Bruce, on the other hand, will need to clean himself up in order to even access his trust. I'm not funding the illicit things he's been into."

"I don't know what else to do. We've tried everything and nothing seems to work. It seems like the social and financial status are the most effective way to get our point across. We've outlined the details in our wills so they cannot be contested or changed." Preston affirms.

We silently look at each other for a few moments. Who knows what he's thinking.

I stand and as I'm walking to the door I hear, "Things will be ok. They have a way of working themselves out. You'll see."

Sighing, I respond, "I'll let you get back to your work. I love you."

I'm perplexed that Preston isn't as bothered by all this as much as I am. He seems so…disconnected. Maybe he's in denial. Maybe he doesn't really know what is being churned out by the rumor mill. After all, he isn't the social one here, he's the businessman and he doesn't like to get involved in the 'fluff' as he calls it.

Unfortunately, the rumor mill can sometimes be more accurate than it should be. However, it's like the game 'Telephone.' When the original information is presented it's accurate. The further along it goes, the more things are either added or taken away from the original information. With the information that's been spewing out from various trusted resources I'm absolutely astonished and mortified to the point that I'm not even sure what is true and what isn't.

Veronica never did anything to show she cared for anyone other than herself. Except for Bruce. They have always been thick as thieves and the older they got, the more secretive they became. He was in and out of jail and we had cut off his allowance. I don't know how he survives in jail but my suspicions are that Veronica is supplying him with funds among other items. Bruce won't have access to his trust until he's stayed out of trouble for a minimum of five years.

I wish I could say that I've never been so disappointed in Veronica but that just isn't possible. She has done some selfish and mean things to others in the past, ever since she was little, but the way she's treated her own daughter Rhiannon is absolutely disgusting and despicable. I never thought I would see the day that I would want to end all ties with either of my children, let alone both of them, but there are some things I cannot ignore. I have to find a way to approach my husband Preston with my thoughts and feelings and I am worried that he will think less of me.

I needed to gather my thoughts and emotions before I went to him so I decided to go for a walk around the property for some quiet time. The pond that was located on the northwest corner was a good mile and a half from the main building and always calmed me so I headed in that direction. I am aware that I'm being followed by my personal security and after all the years we've had them they've kind of become like family and we trust them completely. I haven't expressed my thoughts to anyone, choosing to keep my thoughts to myself for the time being. Until today. I can't pretend I'm ok with how things are going.

"Hello Val." I greet him quietly, my voice full of melancholy.

"Ma'am." He replies as he steps in beside me, matching my stride. It's actually comical considering he's an extremely tall Pacific Islander and naturally takes long strides. His 6'7" height compared to my 5'6" reminds me of King Kong and Jessica Lange in the 1976 version of King Kong. I can't help but give a slight smile.

The sound of our shoes crunching on the cobblestone footpath accompanying our comfortable silence. We make our way to one of the many gazebos scattered around the pond and take a seat. Quietly, I gaze across the tranquil water and watch the gentle ripples reach out from the paddling of a pair of beautiful white swans and their goslings. The fairy tale "The Ugly Duckling" comes to mind and the irony doesn't escape me. Well if that isn't a slap in the face. How appropriate.

"Ma'am? Is everything ok?" I jump slightly when I hear the deep rumble of Val's voice next to me.

Slowly, I turn my head to address him, "Oh! I didn't realize I said that out loud. My apologies." We make eye contact and after a while I avert my eyes and sigh.

"Val, Do you see those swans? How beautiful and elegant they are? They match each other perfectly. However, when you look at the two goslings, they are not pretty or even cute. They are dingy and their color is dull and drab. I can't help but see the comparison to Veronica and Bruce. My focus is not on the adults but I'm thinking more about the babies. A parent can hope and dream their kids will grow into beautiful people and glow with their caring and nurturing hearts. There isn't a parent in the world, past or present, that I know of that has hopes their children are selfish and enjoy inflicting pain on innocent people." I pause, trying to gather my thoughts. "Sometimes I'm amazed that such unattractive offspring can come from such beautiful parents." I turn my head and angle it upward to look at Val. "Does that sound conceited? That's not my intention, I just don't know how to explain my thoughts."

With a kind smile he answers. "Ma'am, there is no need for you to think that is conceited. You are simply making an accurate observation."

I'm silent, anticipating his next words.

Clearing his throat and taking a deep breath he continues. "Joann, it saddens me to see you like this. I've been with you since the kids were born. You've done everything you could to raise your kids to be kind and caring adults. It's been a struggle at times but none of the painful bumps were your fault. Sometimes things are the result of genetic hiccups and sometimes they are a result of environmental influences. In this case, both Veronica and Bruce had access to money and having the life similar to that of a celebrity. You and Preston tried to withhold money from them when you realized that was their priority. It's hard to tell your kids 'No' to things but as a parent you have to. Unfortunately, the lack of money did nothing to change their ways so Preston started giving them their allowance again. You shouldn't think that you are a failure as a parent. You aren't. You were simply given two children who focused on things rather than people."

I sit in silence, gazing across the pond, watching the family of four paddle on the water. The ripples they've created flowing out from the epicenter of their feet and reach out, touching everything in their wake. I'm reminded again of the effects that are felt both near and far by the simple act of paddling. I can't help but feel like I've failed to protect the innocent people who have come in contact with my children. I feel my eyes start to tear up, afraid to say the next words aloud because then it makes things real and that terrifies me.

"Val? I feel like I've failed, as a parent and grandparent and woman, to protect the innocence of my granddaughter."