AN: Here we go. The fourth chapter of the Darkest Arc. I hope you're all quivering with excitement. I for one sure am, since my air conditioning is going and I can't feel my feet!

Also, in case anyone was wondering how to get to the discord, I'm pretty sure my profile has a link to it. If not there, then there's one for the Forum and then the Forum has the Discord address in 'Discord Accord'. Check it if you want to discuss My Craft with fellow readers.

Also, leave a review. I enjoy reading them.

Disclaimer: I don't own Minecraft. If I did, I'd add Clown Wigs.

Chapter 159

Close to the Heart

[Cobb]

Back in the Asmodeus.

Or rather, it wasn't the real Asmodeus, since it was floating in a black Void and the doors led off into random locations that couldn't possibly fit in a wooden airship. It was some sort of mental image for me. The place I felt most at home within?

It was a hub for my other mental organs. The voices I assigned to parts of myself. Compassion, strength, wisdom, intellect, kindness, anger, helpfulness.

Those same pieces were all jumbled up and broken after I fell apart. It was so bad, I couldn't even recognize my friends when they attacked me as phantoms.

But now, with my Brain – my intellect – back where it belonged, I could remember and see everything. I could think things through again.

I was still missing some parts – some I wasn't ready to accept back – but now, maybe I had enough to distinguish between my friends and my enemies. A part of me didn't want to know the truth… but another part asserted that until I came to grips with it, I'd never truly recover from… whatever this was. I had to fix myself. I had to know the truth.

If not…

Brief flashes of myself lashing out at my phantom friends in the rain assaulted my mind. That had happened because I gave in to my anger. I gave in to Blood.

Now, Blood was firmly locked away. It was cut off from the light. It had to be, because I didn't like what it had made me do and what it had made me almost do to Noman.

I passed a hand over the hollow pocket in my gut. It was partly filled, now. I had Bladder, Lungs, Liver, and Brain. My Stomach and Heart I was still without.

Another brief flash of the incomparable pain I felt when I tried to reclaim my Heart. The unfathomable sorrow and anguish…

I gripped my hoodie at the memory before walking down the wooden corridor towards the bridge.

I opened the Brain door back up and slipped inside.

Before, the door had led me to the Stronghold. I was convinced it was the same Stronghold beneath Daymonte – the one where I encountered Lenz.

Now, I was surrounded by the complex machinery of the Redstone Fair. Everywhere I looked I found machines boasting impressive innovations on how to harness the red dust.

"This was where I…" I trailed off, trying to find the exhibit where Lenz tried to make a button behave as a lever. It didn't work then, maybe it'd work now.

Maybe I'd have to fight phantom Lenz again.

I gripped my empty fists. I didn't have a trident like before – not even sure why that materialized – but I didn't want a repeat of before. Me killing all my friends. Even if some of them weren't my friends and they were trying to kill me, I…

I shook my head. There had to be a better way of doing this. There had to be a way to convince myself he wasn't an enemy.

But he and Floyd and Jade were all fighting one another. One of them had to be bad. One of them had to be a cultist. Either that, or it was all big misunderstanding.

I… I got to think things through. I eventually decided. Why else would my mind change this room from the Stronghold to the Fair? My mind is telling me to work out the suspects from start to finish. To figure out where my instincts went wrong in trusting them, if at all.

I had my Brain back. I could think things out. I could analyze their everything from what my eidetic memory remembered. And if there was a discrepancy that didn't fit…

Then I'd have my culprit.

"Hooookay…" I breathed out before starting from the beginning with Lenz.

"Lenz is a Redstone Engineer. He's a nerd." I started, speaking my thoughts aloud. "Nerds can't be cultists. They need people who can kill – ah, but then, he had crazy archer skills despite being a nerd. Hm."

"He was… presenting at the Fair when I met him." I tried again. "He had an invention that he stole the idea off of from the inventions littering the Stronghold. He had been investigating that locked down Stronghold for a while. The same Stronghold that Herobrine and the First Ten broke open to battle a Dragon, according to the Journals I read."

"He was searching for Jeb's lab down there. He found a lab, but it was actually Herobrine's. That's why the original copy of Advanced Mob-Slaying was down there. It was Herobrine's lab. He had the book last."

"And he was experimenting with Hybrids like that Creeper lady or that Ghast woman or Noman's Slime sisters. Was he making them? And was that why Lenz wanted to find the place? Was he really a Lieutenant scouring the Stronghold's ruins for signs of his lost Founder?"

"He ran from me." Immediately, the Redstone Fair swirled into a new scene. The lower levels of the Redstone College where I pursued the engineer. "He tried to kill me." Another swirling change into the stone corridors of the Stronghold. "He defended the Herobrine books and was so eager to translate the back-page secrets written in Jibberish."

I bit my lips, the assumptions and accusations painting a dark picture of Lenz heading a group of cultists.

"He knew I was the Billionth. The cultists are looking for me because they think I know where Herobrine is. I don't, but that wouldn't stop them keeping tabs on me. He sought me out and joined me so easily…"

A shadow was passing over the engineer. A dark, dark shadow that had his features twist into something more vile. Was it true? Was Lenz really a cultist?

"But then… he defended Halstatt with me."

A brief light sparked, dispelling a fraction of the darkness building up around Lenz.

"He fought against a Griefer army and against a Hacker to protect Halstatt. That might speak more about his skills as a Lieutenant, but…"

"…He saved a life."

The scene swirled to a small village with a thunderstorm raging above and Griefers laying siege to a gap in the wall.

"He saved Solara, the Ringwood guard." I repeated, clinging to that one selfless act. "Cultists believe in Next Life. They believe that death is a type of liberation. Solara was wounded and unconscious. Nobody would fault Lenz if she died in the heat of battle. And yet… he kept her alive."

The tiny light broadened, spreading across Lenz's face and softening his features.

"He fought at my side. He came to help against Alec, a Hacker."

"He saved others when the Creeper Herd hit. He kept them alive. He rescued Floyd and I from Hunderprest and his army of dogs. He carried Alexicon, a feeble librarian, to safety when she couldn't move. There wouldn't have been any chance for the cult to recruit him or for him to get 4Blite to sign the Mission Update book."

The light spread to the ends of Lenz's arms and legs, completely dispelling the darkness and making him so bright he was blinding. It was a light made up of all the lives he could have lost yet saved anyway.

"Lenz is a Beginner." I said, resolutely. Even better, I believed it. "He isn't my enemy. He's my friend."

As soon as I uttered those words, the Phantom Lenz materialized before me. But, unlike before, I didn't even flinch. I looked to him with complete and utter faith.

He smiled behind those tinted glasses and dispersed into motes of brilliant light. Behind which there was a door.

I stepped through and found myself back in the corridor of the Asmodeus.

I sighed a sweet breath of relief. "That's one down…"

My attention turned to the Stomach door. Floyd and a missing organ awaited me.

"Let's keep up the momentum…"

When I opened up the door, it was the same scene as last time. Miner's Warren. The decaying, decrepit buildings where Floyd had first rescued me from cultists.

The same place where Floyd had lost his friend, Silent. Soul had been there at the time too, the three separating after encountering Spring and Parker.

There was a blur of smoke behind some buildings. I caught it and took a step back, realizing the Phantom Floyd was coming. I had to think fast.

"Okay. Okay. Floyd. He ran into me – literally – while fleeing the cultists that killed Silent. He was also a nine-digit, like me. Too high a number to be invested in the Endward Cult. He would only have been in Minecraftia for a few days longer than me. Good start."

I jogged down the empty street of Miner's Warren while keeping an eye out for smoky blurs.

"He lost Silent to them and fled, leaving Soul to fight on his own. He came to regret that and sought out Soul, begging for forgiveness. The betrayal and frustration between Floyd and Soul had been genuine, so Silent truly died."

"But… could Floyd have survived another way?"

"What if he was caught by Spring and Parker? He was caught by those two cultists and begged for his life, offering to join them instead. They accepted and let him live. Could that have been how he joined them?"

I could feel the Phantom Floyd watching me from somewhere. The sky was darkening rapidly. Any moment, he was about to strike.

"But then, why rescue me from the cultists?" I countered my own theory.

Elsewhere, the Phantom Floyd receded into the shadows.

"He saved me from Spring and Parker. He didn't even think I was the Billionth. I told him my number was nine-hundred-ninety-nine-million nine-hundred-ninety-nine-thousand nine-hundred-and-ninety-nine. Neither of us knew I was the Billionth, so he had no excuse not to kill me."

"Plus, he was unfamiliar with the Angel of Death. Carys attacked us, and he had no recognition of her."

The scene changed to my duel with Carys on a wooden bridge over a pool of lava.

"No, Floyd was innocent then. No chance of him being a cultist at the time. But what about later?"

The scene changed to the woods outside of Ringwood on our trek to Daymonte. Floyd, plagued by guilty nightmares, unable to sleep. He was truly hurting.

Another scene change. The Silver Intent base under the Granger Barn in Ringwood. The revelation that Floyd was 'dead'. The first instance of what it felt like to lose a part of my World.

"Floyd fought with Teal, a Lieutenant. He discovered his Hacker powers. He was pushed off a cliff yet survived. Could he have made a deal with Teal?"

It was a stretch. Least of all because of the way Floyd, Cara, and Soul had described Teal. A bubbly terror that could snap necks with a flick of the wrist. She wouldn't have spared a Hacker at her tender mercy. She wouldn't have spared Floyd.

The scene changed again, and it was outside Ringwood with a herd of Creepers closing in on the Kingdom.

"Floyd jumped in to save me from 4Blite. The Lieutenant had left awfully fast after that, but he had been trying to capture me anyway. If Floyd were a cultist, wouldn't he have helped 4Blite acquire me?"

The scene changed again. This time, to the treetops of Jolin where Floyd had run so fast down the corkscrew path of the Gift Tree to rescue Princess Alaqua from a gruesome fate.

"That, more than anything else, proves his innocence." I spoke absolutely. "Floyd felt awful about being a Hacker. He felt like the world hated him. He wanted to make amends for all the bad things his people had done. He convinced us to stay and foil the Berserkers' attempt on the Princess' life. His voice was the loudest and he was the proudest once his Hacker speed saved the day."

"A cultist wouldn't have gone as far."

"And his open hatred for Herobrine after discovering the truth – that was genuine too. He despised Herobrine for manipulating the Hack Clan and being the Founder of the cult that killed his friend. He would never join them. Not in a million years."

There was a shadowy blur of movement as a dark whirlwind came hurtling down the street towards me. I spun on the spot, staring the oncoming Hacker down.

"You're no cultist." I said.

At the last second, the Phantom stopped. He looked at me with those eyes of black and nodded once before doing the same as Lenz's Phantom and vanishing into motes of light. An orange glow remained, however, around where Floyd's gut had been.

It was filled with warmth that diffused into me as I gazed upon it.

Stomach.

It floated towards me unbidden before sinking through my hoodie and settling beside my Liver. The hollow pocket resealed itself by another portion. Instantly, I felt a great strength welling up inside, like I had the power to do anything.

The hollow pocket shrank to around a fist-shaped size at my chest, nestled between my Lungs. One part was left missing. My Heart.

Blood was missing too, but I kept that part of me far away. I wasn't prepared to revisit it right now. I couldn't accept my anger.

I was unsurprised when a door materialized before me. I gripped the knob and walked out, back into the corridor.

I looked upon the last door. The last suspect.

Jade.

I hesitated only a second before pulling at the knob and stepping inside.

Again, I found myself amongst Jolin's treetops.

"Okay, Jade." I said to myself. "Let's review."

"Well, look who it is. Fancy seeing you back here, pig-killer."

I stiffened. That unsettling, husky cadence that had me reaching for a weapon that wasn't there and turning to face her.

Carys_Angel.

There she was, sat on the edge of the fence posts acting as railing for Jolin's suspended bridges. She was relaxed and with a smug smirk with that wicked diamond scythe in her lap.

I took a half-step back, realizing I had nothing to defend myself with. If she attacked, I'd be doomed.

"Already on guard, hm? As you should be." She nodded, pleased.

"…I was hoping I just imagined a scythe-wielder coming to my aid." I said, causing her smirk to widen.

"Ah, so you do remember that. If it makes you feel any better, I too was hoping I was just some figment of your braindead psyche." She hopped off the fence, making me tense, only to stroll past me, swinging her scythe. "Though, I'll admit, it was funny when you thanked me for saving you from your girlfriend. I would have burst out into laughter if I wasn't some dark Phantom thing. You're really messed up in the head, aren't you?"

I ignored the insult. I couldn't exactly dispute it anyway. I was messed up in the head to be talking to her like this.

"…Why'd you do it?" I asked, watching her carefully. "There's no universe where Carys-fricking-Angel saves my life."

"That's not true, though, is it?"

I thought for a moment before sighing. "Alright, there is, but I don't mean when she saves my life just so she could torment me with my friends' death."

She nodded happily at that, walking down the suspended bridge towards the Gift Tree. Against my better judgement, I followed her.

"So? Why'd you help me?"

She shrugged. "It's not like I'm the real Carys_Angel. I'm just how you remember me. My thoughts are just how you figure them to be. I'm whatever you envision me as."

"Is that right?" I paused, a small smile coming to my face as I thought really, really hard about something.

In a flash, Carys was decked out in a light-pink tutu and a rainbow clown wig. She frowned and an angry tick mark or two emerged on her forehead. It was a sight I'd never see in the real world, but would be forever ingrained in my head until the day I died. I should have been doubled over in laughter at the embarrassed killer. It should have been the funniest thing in the world!

Yet, strangely enough, no laughter bubbled forth. There was mild satisfaction, but... I couldn't laugh at it, even though I should have been. I just didn't have enough passion for it.

My missing heart may have been the reason.

"Hilarious." She muttered dryly before tearing off the offending articles with particularly violent ripping sounds. For good measure, she stomped on the clown wig where it let out a pitiable squeak before bursting into fine motes of light.

Even if I didn't find any humor in dressing Carys like a ballet-dancing clown, it still helped to make me a lot more comfortable with the Phantom. It wasn't really her, so I had nothing to fear. Probably.

"So, why are you here?" I asked again. "This is supposed to be the inner sanctum of my Heart. No offense, but I can't imagine a place for you here."

"Love and fear. Two sides of the same heart." She offered. "I'm your greatest fear—which is flattering—because I represent the death of all your friends and the end of your World. And that hasn't changed."

Instantly, the Phantom Carys was standing before me, scythe tickling my neck. The scene around us darkened and I felt her breath against my neck.

"I will stop at nothing to avenge Mr. Piggles and make you suffer for what you did to me."

Surprisingly, I wasn't scared. Maybe it was because my friends weren't here for her to kill and this was all in my head, but I found myself looking at Carys without fear.

"I still don't get why you of all people would save me from Jade."

The tense atmosphere retreated in a blink as Carys released me with a tired sigh, like she was talking with a toddler.

"Are you so dim, you can't even figure that out?" She looked aggrieved. "Oh, woe is me to have to explain a man's own thoughts to him."

"Just tell me. Or do you want me to add a clown nose to your ensemble?" I leaned back as a jutted finger nearly stabbed me in the cheek.

"You," Carys began, "can't tell the difference between your friends and your enemies. That's what started this whole 'inception' crap in the first place. If you see your friends attacking you as enemies, wouldn't it also make sense to see your enemies protecting you as friends?"

I paused at the idea, not willing to admit she was right. Or rather, how I thought of her was right – ugh, too confusing. Bottom line, I couldn't tell my friends and enemies apart. Except I was making progress! Lenz and Floyd were cleared. And I didn't even have to think on Carys.

"You're definitely my enemy." I said flatly. To that, she only smiled mysteriously.

"If you say so."

"I know so." I insisted, watching as she walked off to the side. "You're not a part of me I care about. You're only here because, like you said, I fear what you represent. You're trying to kill my friends."

"There are worse things one can do. Just ask your girlfriend." She crooned, making me swallow my next string of insults. She laughed as she hopped back onto the fence and jumped off.

"See you in your nightmares." She promised darkly before vanishing from sight.

I grabbed at the hole in my chest, unsettled by that last, chilling promise and the other words she said.

"Should have just imagined her as a puppy or something."

I tried to put it out of my mind as I made my way across the suspended bridge and towards the central Gift Tree. Jade's Phantom was still lurking somewhere, but if this place followed the same strange logic as the other locations, the Phantom would only appear as an enemy so long as I thought them that way. I just had to think and reason away the possibility of Jade being a cultist, then I'd be fine.

As for reclaiming my Heart...

The pain was still fresh in my mind. Maybe it would lessen if I proved Jade's innocence...?

"Hmph. Carys doesn't know what she's talking about." I tried to shrug off, taking the first steps of the corkscrew path up the Gift Tree. "Jade's been helping us since day one. No way she could be bad."

But then why would Floyd and Lenz think otherwise?

"...I just need to look over the facts. Start to finish."

As I kept climbing the wooden steps, the jungle scene swirled and changed before my eyes. It wasn't a jungle of high trees anymore, it was the Origin Forest outside of Ringwood.

"When I first met Jade, she was helping those fresh spawns fight off Spiders and Mobs. I came to her rescue, sure, but she saved all those people. A cultist wouldn't—"

'We got caught in the middle of it before we could reach the walls. The others… they…' Jade let out an aggrieved sigh. 'I barely escaped through the trees. The Creepers were all over them. There was nothing I could do.' She held herself tightly. 'There was nothing I could do…'

I stopped mid-step, remembering what she herself told me. The fresh spawns never made it because of the Creeper Herd. That's what she said. So then… all those lives I saw her save… died in the end…?

After a moment of contemplation, I resumed my ascending walk. The scene beyond swirled and changed until it was the Origin. Specifically, it was in the aftermath of Floyd and Thed's epic clash.

"She—Jade followed us. She helped us stay a step ahead of the guards and bounty hunters. She didn't want to approach us because she was nervous around a Hacker like Floyd. A cultist would have no reason to aid us in avoiding the authorities. If she were a Lieutenant, she would have just killed us—"

But that wasn't right either, because 4Blite hadn't.

4Blite had me dead to rights during the Creeper Herd attack. He could have killed me. But then he saw my name.

'You're…' 4Blite spoke softly, looking me up and down. 'King_Cobb. The Billionth…'

'…Where is he?' 4Blite asked with what I could only describe as barely restrained excitement. 'The Founder! You know where he is! You must!'

'…I can't kill you. Ember warned us not to… tch! Of all the people to interfere! Or maybe it's because it's you that you're interfering here now. Either way… I can't let this opportunity pass. You're coming with me.'

From that, I knew a couple of things. The Endward Cult knew my name and number. They wrongly thought I knew where their Founder was and would keep me alive for that information. A mysterious Ember—4Blite's Executive—warned them off of killing me.

Thinking like that… wouldn't it make perfect sense why Jade protected me? Wouldn't it make perfect sense why she was essentially stalking our group all the way from Ringwood to Jolin? I never questioned her before, because she claimed to idolize me for my efforts in Halstatt, but…

Why hadn't I thought deeper about that?

"She… she had a linked map…" I kept going, my steps growing more and more sluggish. "She got it from the fresh spawns we helped at the Origin—"

That's what she claimed anyway.

I bit my lip, thinking back. At the time, it had been easy to accept that Jade—a seemingly innocuous parkour master—had stolen a map just to follow us. But, given her mastery with her Cutlass, it would stand to reason that she could have… to get the map… killed…

I thought back to the maps. The white blip that always remained in Ringwood. The white blip that never left. That always proved that the fresh spawns had made it to Ringwood… or at least their map did. And how strange that I never saw it move to someplace else, as if the fresh spawns were content to spend the rest of their lives in the same place. It had never been missing. It was always held. Always kept on the radar. Always present and stationary. It was always too perfect.

Again, why hadn't I thought deeper on that? That's easy. I had a full plate coming to grips with Carys' reappearance in Zeppil, accepting Noman into the team, and getting over the discovery of the cult's Founder.

At the end of the day, though, I guess I just didn't care for them as much as I thought. I could barely remember their names. I hardly knew them.

But I knew Jade.

"She confessed her insecurities." I muttered, the scene swirling again to that of Zeppil. "She admitted her skill with the Cutlass and the guilds that saw her only for what they could get out of her. She confessed her true skills. She ran away in tears when I didn't immediately accept her, but she came back and we smoothed things out. She could be herself around us again. She even swooped in to save me from Leadstripe—"

But then… she chased him. And lost him. Despite her parkour skills. Despite her sword skills. Despite Leadstripe being weakened and fleeing, he eluded her.

'C-Cobb! I… I didn't lose him yet!' Jade panted, her voice shaking. 'I-I found all these alleys, and I didn't know which to pick, so I r-ran down the first one, and hit a dead end. Then I doubled back and t-tried the next one, and then the next…' She trailed off, trying to catch her breath. 'H-He has to still be around. I'll find him! I swear!'

'I could have finished him! I had the skills! I wasn't trying to hold back anymore…'

If she wasn't holding back anymore, how did he get away from her?

Because she let him…

Again, the surroundings swirled and blurred, becoming the dry mesa of Akasha. Specifically, the natural formation that was Indrad Rock.

"Someone had to plant that book there…" I muttered. "It could have been anyone, but… Jade could scale it. She was looking to kill Nephrait."

Then, there was what she said in the Pit. The easy lies. The way she commanded those imprisoned cultists as if she had done it all her life.

'I'm a Lieutenant.' Jade lied smoothly.

She could lie smoothly. Like when she pretended to have no skills.

'That… would be because I'm from the North.'

A Northern Lieutenant could ask 4Blite for a favor. And what was written in the Mission Update book was startlingly specific. As if the writer was intimately familiar with the situation.

And hadn't Jade argued the most that McGahn was truly a cultist?

'Why are you still holding onto that thing, Cobb? Get rid of it. Nothing but bad memories.'

'Well, how else can you explain that book? It was signed by a Lieutenant and made clear references to both McGahn and that klepto. It was in the councilman's office. He's our guy!'

'Oh, come on. Are we really second-guessing ourselves? Have you read the Mission Update?'

'Maybe he was… cocky. Complacency. People so sure they won't get caught that they start to believe it and they make stupid mistakes. They trip up.'

'But the book was signed. You can't forge a signature.'

She had kept arguing. She was the last to accept what I realized was strange about that book. She was desperate to put it behind her…

And then, the very same night, the conflict had happened. Floyd and Lenz against Jade.

I didn't realize I reached the tops of the corkscrew path until I nearly bumped up against a wall. It was a wooden building with a single door. The scene surrounding the Gift Tree had shifted to Void black. No more memories to check.

I turned back to the door and reached out, my hands fumbling with the knob before pulling it open. My eyes widened as I found myself ushered into an extravagant great hall. It was the same one in Cloud Castle on the night of the End-of-Games Celebration for the Parkour Games. There was the table laden with food, the slot-machines in the corner, the packed dance floor…

Oh…

The faceless dancers parted, forming a wall of bodies in the shape of a loose circle. Standing in the dead center, wearing her familiar form-fitting, green leather jacket and somehow looking more beautiful than ever, was Jade.

She wasn't glaring at me like some evil Phantom. In fact, she only just noticed me. She smiled a brilliant smile that would have melted my heart if I had one. She approached at a casual pace, the faceless dancers staying out of her way and subtly urging me to meet her halfway.

I stood right where I was.

When she got close, I could smell the faint scent of apples. It was stronger now, as if my senses were heightened. She looked better. She smelled better. Everything felt pleasing to the senses. It was all so attractive.

But I was thinking with my head now. Not my heart.

She giggled in that beautiful way she did as she held out a hand, inviting me for a dance. She knew I had two left feet, but she didn't care about impressing this faceless crowd. All she cared about was enjoying her time with me. And me enjoying my time with her.

I looked at the hand as if it were a weapon before I slowly tilted my gaze up.

When our eyes met…

I couldn't feel anything. No anger or love or sadness. I just… looked at her. I met those orbs I often compared to amethysts and just… poured in every ounce of what I thought on the walk up here.

I assaulted her with every suspicion, every hint of evidence, even some of the fantastic theories that I could never truly prove, but would always linger in the back of my mind. I threw it all out at her. And the face I showed from it?

It spoke of the deepest betrayal. Of things that could not easily be mended.

Now I knew why even touching my Heart brought on unendurable agony. When my Heart separated from me, it was to protect me—or maybe to soften the blow.

"You're a Lieutenant." I whispered, stepping back and away from her waiting hand.

It dropped at my words and Jade's other arm reached for her Cutlass. Her eyes flashing dangerously as she intended to end my life then and there.

Before she could, the entire great hall winked out of existence. The table full of food, the faceless crowd, the attacking Jade. They all vanished.

All I was left standing in was an empty, black Void. A door awaited me.

As did my Heart.

It was glowing gold and hovering in the darkness, just waiting for me to claim.

"Jade is a cultist." I repeated, hardly believing it despite proving it to be true. Before, I hadn't thought with my Brain. I left all the thinking to my Heart, and that's how Jade got close to it. She appealed to my emotions and fooled me into thinking she…

I remembered the kiss we shared in my room. I remembered the parkour training. I remembered our date in Akasha and the Sweeping Edge III Enchantment she gifted to me.

There was a dull feeling where my chest was and I subconsciously reached for the hole there. So close to my Heart, I could feel almost an echo of what it felt.

I knew that attempting to reclaim my Heart would bring back the same agony from before. It would feel worse than death. That was what my Brain was telling me.

It would make me feel again. And what I would feel would be a storm of swirling emotions that would make me unpredictable and stupid. I'd be worse than useless with my Heart back, and maybe I'd even give in to Blood again.

Heart and Blood.

I couldn't find the point of them right now.

I left that Heart floating there in that dark, empty Void. I turned from it and walked right out that door without a second glance.

Who needed a Heart anyway?

[Noman]

I momentarily forgot how to breathe when Cobb sat up from the bed. Two whole days after his fever broke he had been lying on that bed with barely a stir. But now he was up. His eyes were open. Duller, true, but he just woke up from a very long nap.

"Cobb!" I cheered, nearly tackling him before remembering the Severe Shield would have killed me. Instead, I got up and moved to be directly in his line of sight. I had no weapons and showed him my empty hands in case he thought I was a threat. "You're up! Are you okay? Do you need anything?"

His mouth worked and he tried to say something only to cough. He wet his lips and swallowed dryly.

"Water…" He rasped.

"Of course!" I leapt at the request, taking out a bottle I filled from a nearby pool. I offered it to the fisherman and watched as he guzzled it down.

"Food…" He said next, though his throat didn't sound as scratchy.

I was so happy he was up and eating, I handed him one of my rare Enchanted Golden Apples. He savaged it with his teeth, swallowing every morsel. It was then he took stock of the Severe Shield over his chest.

"Why am I wearing this?" He said, confused, before he tugged it off and returned it to me. He didn't need it anymore now that he had something in his stomach. His Hunger Meter had life again, and it was fast filling up with how much Cobb was eating. He tore through the last of his Cooked Mutton and gratefully accepted the porkchops I offered. I didn't stop standing over him until both his Health and Hunger Meters were back to full capacity. Then, I sat down and breathed out a hysterical sigh of relief.

"Thank Notch." I laughed/cried. "Thank Notch…"

"Sorry I worried you." Cobb said, his head bowed low.

"You better be." I reprimanded. I felt I was owed it after the scare he had put me through. "You just up and collapsed. You had a high fever too. I didn't even think Crafters could get fevers."

"How long was I out?" He asked, gazing around the makeshift shelter.

"Let's see…" I had to think since most of my time had been spent splashing Cobb with potions instead of watching the cycles of the sun and moon. "It's been four days since you collapsed. You missed the Bounty Days, but that hardly matters compared with your health. You were starving for almost the whole time. You couldn't eat. I only managed to keep you alive with splash potions and the Severe Shield."

"Really?" He went pale, feeling around his chest for some reason. "Four whole days? It felt like less…"

Maybe for him, but for me it was four days of panicked bumbling and terror. The whole time, there was always that niggling doubt that he would never wake up. It was a miracle I got any sleep while caring for him.

"Is it just you here?" He asked, his arm weakly reaching for the sword at his belt while he glancing around. The action had him teeter slightly off the bed, and I reached out to support him.

"Yes, it's just me." I nodded, sensing the inevitable unpleasant topic coming on. "Cobb, about what happened four days ago…" I trailed off, unsure if bringing it back up would cause a relapse.

"They were fighting, I know." He took the choice out of my hands before sliding out of bed one leg at a time. "It was such a shock that I… I guess I knocked myself out."

"For four whole days? Is that possible?"

"Must be. It happened." He shrugged. "It was a lot to process at the time. I couldn't—I'm good now, don't worry."

"Are you sure?" If you asked me, he didn't look okay. His movements were weak and his eyes looked so tired and empty. He needed more bed rest. Just until he regained his strength.

"I'm alright." He said again, though it looked like he was addressing the bed covers. "I'm okay."

"I think you need to rest a bit—"

"I need to talk with the others." He cut me off. "Floyd. Lenz… Jade. I need to speak with them."

"They're not here, though. They don't know where we are. Cobb, I stashed our maps away and hid ourselves here after they fought one another." Noman's eyes darted. "Cobb, they accused each other of being cultists."

"I know…"

"I don't think you're in any condition to confront them right now—"

"I know who's lying." He insisted, pushing himself out of bed only to collapse against my shoulder. I struggled to hold him up. "I know the one… I have to see them…"

"You… you know who the cultist is?" I asked, his words getting the better of me.

"…Maybe."

"Maybe?"

"I have to see them to be sure." He persisted in trying to stand, but I held him still.

"Cobb, look at you. You can barely walk. You should wait until you're fully rested before—"

"Not for this." He shook his head. "It has to be sooner rather than later. This needs to be done."

The way he said it—the finality in his tone—made me realize how exhausted he truly was. Whatever he experienced while he was under, it had deeply affected and changed him. This was a man who underwent the worst kind of ordeal and wanted it seen through to the end. And that end was within sight.

"Please, Noman, help me."

"…Alright. I'll do what I can."

I took the full brunt of his weight as I carried him over to the chest and handed him his dyed leather tunic. He weakly tugged it on and I helped set it properly across his torso. Our maps were waiting and he seemed to want us to carry them immediately.

"We'll be drawing them to us with this." I warned. "Are you sure you're ready to face them?"

At that, he let out a humorless chuckle.

"I already have…"

[Floyd]

It was the fourth day of searching when we got an indication of Cobb and Noman's whereabouts. Their blips just suddenly appeared on our maps.

"Are we sure it is them?" Lenz asked, though he was already turning the Asmodeus in their direction.

"It has to be." I nodded, my Hacker smoke finally diminishing. My anger with Jade had burnt hot, fueling my powers. But four days had given it time to cool, and finding a hint on our missing friends made me relieved enough to snuff the dark vapor for now.

I had been keeping a careful watch over the maps in case Jade's blip appeared again. Instead, I had watched Soul's blip in Akasha start to make its way towards us. It seemed he had concluded his business with Captain Obsidian and was eager to retake his spot with the Beginners. Considering the situation with Jade, we needed all the help we could get.

But now, Cobb and Noman's blips were back.

"Should we be concerned?" Lenz asked. "Nowhere said he would kill us if we approached, and he has the means to do it."

"No, they're inviting us." I assured. "They wouldn't be revealing their location after keeping it hidden for so long unless they were ready to talk. And this time, we have the advantage over the snake girl. Her blip is nowhere to be seen." I grinned viciously. "Let's see how innocent she looks when we're the only ones who show up. That reptilian backstabber won't have a leg to stand on."

"We should think on what to say." Lenz advised. "Clear, concise bullet points to get our facts across. We cannot leave room for them to doubt us, otherwise Jade will have a foothold."

"Right. We'll set Cobb straight." I nodded. "He's gonna take it rough—rougher than we last saw him."

"I must admit, I have never been in a relationship before." Lenz commented while steering us towards Cobb's blip. "Tell me, are break-ups that devastating?"

"I haven't had a girlfriend either, Lenz. But seeing how the two kissed and dated…" I trailed off, remembering all the lovey-dovey moments and looks the two shared. I never would have imagined Jade was faking it all. "Cobb's going to take it bad."

"How bad?"

"As bad as it gets. But as his friends, we need to be ready to save him from whatever bad place this confrontation lands him. We'll be there for him, and we'll keep Jade as far away as possible."

Lenz stared out the window, his tinted glasses reflecting the setting sun. "Do you think Cobbert would have been better off if he never pursued a relationship with her?"

"I don't think it really matters. He still saw his friends fighting. That's what triggered him."

He hummed noncommittally, glancing between his map and the controls. "We should be close. I am going to dock the ship underground so that Jade cannot locate us. We can walk the rest of the way."

Through Lenz's exceptional piloting skill, we got the Asmodeus nestled in the dirt amongst a bushel of trees. The airship's wooden frame and sails phased through the solid blocks of the ground before he parked it. Then, we climbed out of the bridge's window, impressed with our hiding spot.

"I'd like to see Jade find us now."

After that, we took out our maps and followed the white blips. It was a bit further than Lenz said, but we eventually found ourselves in a clearing. Ironically, it was the very same clearing Cobb collapsed in four days ago.

Cobb and Noman stood there, waiting.

Better still, Cobb was up and standing on his own two feet... sort of. He had partial help from Noman who was propping him up with one arm. He had the Severe Shield on too, expecting a fight.

I opened my mouth to say something, only for a feminine voice to beat me to it.

"Cobb! Thank goodness you're okay!"

I whipped around, smoke flaring. How the hell was Jade there!? She didn't come up on our maps! There should have been no way for her to track us! She couldn't have come here through luck!

And yet, there she was. She stepped out from the trees and into the clearing, though she kept a wide berth from us. I could feel my MultiAura prickling under my skin as I gazed upon her easy expression. She had no right to be concerned for Cobb after what she'd caused!

Her voice seemed to stir something in Cobb as he held himself up without Noman's assistance. He looked to the three of us with duller eyes than I ever saw from him.

"Noman, what happened?" I asked. "What have you two been doing for four whole days?"

"Resting." Noman offered simply.

"Is Cobb feeling any better. He still looks tired." Jade sounded concerned, the little snake.

"He's been through a lot." Noman spoke vaguely. Then he tensed. "That's far enough you three." We all stopped in our tracks. "You want to talk with Cobb, you talk from there."

"Oh, come now. Some of us actually care for our friends." Jade had the gall to say. "Besides, we can't all be cultists."

"All the same, please keep your distance."

Jade frowned, but folded her arms in acceptance. I was half tempted to blow everything and make an attempt on her with my Hacker speed. But with Cobb watching, I wasn't going to give Jade the satisfaction of throwing the first punch. Officially out her first, then brutally maim her. Jade wouldn't stand a chance if Cobb and Noman knew the truth about her, and she must have had the same thought because she was already trying to win points.

"I'm fine with talking from here." Jade nodded towards me. "Just keep an eye on Floyd over there. He really wants to kill me. He's wanted it ever since I revealed his true colors."

"I want to kill you alright." I spoke through my teeth. "You're a Lieutenant of the Endward Cult. You've been acting like our friend while secretly plotting to—"

"Stop." Cobb muttered. His voice may have been weak but it carried across the clearing. He looked at each one of us, fanned out before him. "I came here to get this done. I came here to find out the truth."

One of his hands rested over his chest.

"I'm going to ask each of you a question."

[Jade]

Sometimes, my brain surprised me with how clever it could be. Ember always said it was because I learned from the best, but I liked to think it was because of all the unpredictable curve-balls being thrown at me during my time with the Beginners and how I had to adapt to survive.

Hitching a ride on the Asmodeus? Great idea. But pretending to jump off to get Lenz and Floyd to lower their guards while secretly stowing away on the roof? Brilliant.

And it paid off. I didn't need to access my map to find Cobb. I just had to wait for Lenz and Floyd to dock it in the ground before following them to the meet-up point. Now, we were all on equal footing before Cobb and Noman.

Except I knew him better.

I knew him at his best and worst. I knew his fears and joys. I even knew the taste of his lips on mine.

Floyd was already arousing suspicion with his plain loathing of me. He admitted as much, and my fingers were instinctively hovering over my splash potions in case he made a move.

He was so fast he'd definitely land a hit from this close before I could counter, but so long as I paralyzed him, I could turn it around. If he attacked first, Cobb might just jump in to rescue me regardless of his uncertainty over who was the true cultist. I just had to keep provoking Floyd while maintaining my innocent persona, and I'd handily win Cobb's trust back.

"I'm going to ask each of you a question."

I was caught by surprise by the frank bluntness behind those words. Cobb's voice sounded different somehow. It was a direct, no-nonsense statement that impressed upon me how severe the fisherman had taken this betrayal. Of the four days he was missing, I had no idea how many of those he spent knocked out. It had to be recent, though, given how exhausted he looked. He was swaying with the breeze and Noman stood ready to catch him should he topple.

Yet, despite appearing weak, there was a certain determination in Cobb's eyes. No warmth, though. Not like before.

He's changed…

"The questions I'm about to ask," Cobb continued, "will determine which of you are cultists and which of you are truly my friends. Therefore, I ask you to only speak the truth."

He gazed at each one of us before raising a hand to rub at his eyes.

"I'm tired." He sighed wearily. "I'm so, so tired and I want this done. Not because I take any pleasure in solving this horrible mystery, but because I want to put this behind me as fast as possible. I know this isn't some sort of misunderstanding. One of you is the traitor." He spoke it like a malediction and I had the odd thought I would burst into flames.

No, I've got nothing to worry about. I can convince him. I thought confidently.

"One of you is the traitor," he repeated, "and your answers to these questions will prove it. Speak honestly. Answer truthfully. If you do…" He closed his eyes, the words taking all of his energy just to be spoken. "If you speak the truth, I give you my word that you will not be harmed. You'll be free to go."

"What!?" Floyd shouted from my right. "Cobb, you can't let Jade—!"

"You'll be let go." Cobb cut off. "I just want to hear the truth from your mouth. Lie, and I won't give a single, lonely fuck about you. Lie, and I won't care if the others tear you apart. Just speak the truth. Confess to it. Just this once."

A silence settled upon the clearing as the sun continued to set. The Mobs would be out soon and I could tell that everyone wanted this settled before then. Cobb wasn't messing around though. He wanted the truth. No more lies. Not after what they'd done to him.

He won't know. I tried to convince myself. He didn't tell when I lied before. He's not like Ember with her Soul-Gaze. He won't be able to tell a truth from a lie, or even a half-lie. No matter what the question is, I've got this.

"Very well, Cobbert." Lenz broke the silence. "We will honor your request and be completely candid."

"And what's happened in the dark," I cottoned on, "will come out in the light."

Floyd shot me a look. He wasn't happy about that line. I couldn't just say nothing like him, though. That would made me look more guilty. At least I wasn't simmering in silence like some broody gargoyle.

"Ask away." Floyd finally said, folding his arms. Another classic mistake. Liars folded their arms defensively. He didn't even realize what he was doing, the amateur. Not like me. I could wear the mask. I was the Poisoned Dagger.

"Alright then." Cobb said before facing the first person. "Lenzington." He used his full name. "Are you a cultist?"

…What?

That was the question!?

What kind of—I expected a lot. I expected questions about alibis, questions about beliefs, clever attempts to catch someone out in a lie. But never did I expect such a straightforward query. What, did Cobb think his little speech would deter us from lying? Did he think we'd be too scared to say anything but the truth?

HA! He had a lot to learn about people. He was nowhere near Ember's level of detecting bullshit.

At the direct question, Lenz paused for a moment to lower his tinted glasses and look Cobb directly in the eye.

"No. I am not a cultist."

Cobb held his gaze for a good twenty seconds before slowly turning away to the next person in the line.

"Flawwed_Floyd." Cobb used the full name again. "Are you a cultist?"

"You know the answer to this."

"Say it." He commanded testily. Behind him, Noman shifted, the threat of the Severe Shield clear.

Meanwhile, I internally laughed. He was just making himself look worse by dodging the question. Even one as simple as that.

"No." Floyd said simply. "No, I'm not a cultist. I've never been a cultist and I'd rather die than join Silent's killers."

Again, Cobb held his gaze for a few moments before slowly turning to the last person. Me.

Alright, here we go.

I put up my routine mask, staring Cobb down as he turned to face me. Before he could even open his mouth, however, I saw the look in his eyes.

I killed a lot of Crafters in my time with the Endward Cult. Mostly through betrayals and backstabs. And they were usually backstabs if I had a say in it. I couldn't stand to see the look on their faces when I turned on them, specifically the Newbs. They were just so innocent and fresh, their looks of betrayal were a mixture of confusion, anger, and fear.

Those eyes were always the worst for me to look at. Even with the knowledge they were passing on to a better life, those eyes always stuck with me. Probably because it was a look that said, 'I never thought you would betray me. Why?'

That was the exact same look Cobb was tilting my way.

"AceOfJades." He spoke slowly, the long name unfamiliar to him. "Are you a cultist?"

Most times when you asked a question, your voice rose and fell—the tones more akin to waves of the sea. When Cobb asked, it was all one tone. One, flat tone. Not even a question.

That, coupled with the look he was shooting me—like I was the lowest thing in the world—shattered every one of my carefully built masks. He broke through all the defenses I put up and I found myself facing Cobb at my most vulnerable.

"I-I…" I stammered for words, my breath stolen from me like it was an all too familiar make-out session with the fisherman, only this time there was no love. No pleasure. There was just Cobb and those dead eyes of his silently asking me 'Why?'

"Jade." He said. "Are you a cultist?"

I was blowing it. I was blowing everything. I had to say something. I had to come up with a lie. I had to paste the masks back together or else risk losing what I had with the fisherman. I had to explain myself. I had to convince him it wasn't me. I had to… I had to…

"Just say it." He hissed under his breath. Yet I heard every word as they ripped through me.

He knew. He knew everything.

Nothing I could say would change his mind. I knew that now.

Suddenly, his simple question had my throat drying out and my tongue going numb. My mind was drawing a blank, and that's something someone never wants to happen in a crucial moment like this.

No lie would work on the fisherman. Already, the other Beginners were looking to me and my stammering silence. If I looked, I bet Floyd would be smirking.

I said the only thing I could. The only thing that could ensure my survival, even if it was a slim chance.

"…Yes."

I spoke the word quietly. So quiet that all but Cobb would have missed it. And once that word was dragged out, there was nothing left but full disclosure. I thought I knew Cobb well enough to lie to him again, and yet he blew my expectations out of the water. He had a habit of that.

Now, I didn't know what he'd do. And that scared me.

"Yes, I'm a cultist." I said loud enough so that everyone could hear it. "I'm a cultist—A Northern Lieutenant." I didn't know why I was being this honest, just that I felt compelled to speak the truth to Cobb as some way of atoning.

Would he even care how much I shared? Was there any point to keep anything from him? I already 'confessed' once while withholding more. Now, my words probably meant less than dirt to him. He didn't even react.

The others did, though. Noman tensed, reaching for his shield and Severe Shield. Lenz drew his bow and Floyd was about to forgo weapon and just barrel into me.

"Stop." Cobb called out, stopping everybody. "Don't attack."

"Cobbert, she just admitted to—"

"I have more questions." He interrupted, weakly taking a step forward. "Drop your weapons and keep away from her."

"Why?" Floyd asked through gritted teeth and swirling smoke. "Anything she says is just going to hurt you more. If you can't do it, I'll gladly—"

"I have to ask this, Floyd." He said. "I know you and Lenz enough to trust you as friends. Please, trust me to do this."

Those words seemed to have the needed effect as Floyd's Hacker smoke fizzled out and he wore a conflicted expression. He clearly wanted nothing more than to kill me, but he backed down instead. Lenz and Noman lowered their weapons too.

And then all the Beginners arranged themselves behind Cobb while he faced me. The lines were clearly drawn. What hope did I have fighting all four of them?

All I could do was answer his questions.

And they were tough.

"Was it all an act?" He started. "Is anything I know about you true? What parts are made up and what parts are real?"

"I had a husband. Jack_Pall. He was abusive and nearly choked me to death. He died to a cultist—me—when I stabbed him with this Cutlass. I joined other guilds with the intent of leading them to their doom." No point in sugar-coating it. The reveals had the others recoiling in horror, but Cobb remained unsettlingly passive. "They abused me in a different way than Jack—they used me for my skills. Some even used me for my body. It made it that much easier to send them off. When I wasn't infiltrating guilds, my subdivision and I targeted Newbs." Still no reaction from him. I expected anger, but... his eyes were as dead as ever. "I killed the Newbs during the Creeper Herd." I threw out, looking for a flash of emotion. Nothing. "I killed the Newbs with the linked maps from the Origin. To get us coal, I had Mirabelle write her own suicide note before killing her… and Beatrix. I framed McGahn and Nephrait to try and save you."

"Do you care about me?" He asked next, as if the previous information didn't even matter. "Do you love me?"

Of course I cared for him. But were my feelings love? They grew from such a shitty place—I never expected my deadened heart to beat again. Love had been the furthest from my mind after the trainwreck that was Jack_Pall. And yet... Cobb was... Cobb was...

"Yes..." I whispered. "I think so. I… I do."

He didn't immediately go to the next question. He grabbed at his chest, frowning slightly. My words had some kind of effect and there was a flash of something in his eyes. It was smothered a second later.

"Why did you frame and try to kill Floyd and Lenz? Did you think that'd make me happy?" His voice grew harsh. "Did you think layering lies atop more lies would make anything about this okay? I can lie too. I can say something like 'I don't care that you tried to kill my friends.' Or 'I know you were lying to protect me'."

"I did protect you!" I shouted back, hurt by his callous disregard for my love. "I couldn't let you learn the truth from them. They'd say it all wrong! They wouldn't tell things from my perspective! They would have colored your opinion of me and there would have been nothing I could do to change your mind. I offered them a chance to keep quiet, but they refused. They wouldn't listen. I had no other choice!"

"So then, after you killed them and accused them of being cultists, would you have explained to me that truth in time?" I bit my lip at his accusations. "Do you think I would understand after a few weeks? A few decades, maybe, after more and more lies piled up and I was too deep to be without you? Did you plan on telling me at all? Or were you prepared to take that lie to your grave?"

"…"

Cobb breathed heavily, swaying with the breeze. Saying those things had taken a lot out of him. Noman moved to help, but Cobb stepped away, holding up his hand.

"...How many innocent people lost their lives so that you could keep this lie?" Cobb asked. "How many lives was it worth? How much blood is on your hands?"

"Lives aren't lost, only exchanged." I defended. "And so long as it wasn't a part of your World, do you care who died? They're empty names and faces."

"Mirabelle. Beatrix. Troy. Guile. Gina. Nance. Wyatt. McGahn. Nephrait." He listed without batting an eye. "And all the Newbs and guildmembers that paid the price. I'm sure they all have names and faces. You would know since it says so on the Heads you gather."

"…"

"What was your plan going in?" Another hard question. I wished to just skip them, but knew this was no college exam. "What were your thoughts, what was your goal, what changed and when? Do you regret any of what you've said or done? What's your plan now?"

There was so much to cover there. I took a moment to gather myself, thinking back to what changed and when. It had been happier times, then. Simpler too. Not like now.

"…Going in I was to keep tabs on the Billionth. I… wanted to kill the Billionth, but Ember—my Executive—said no. She said to only infiltrate and win your trust… and heart. But this infiltration wasn't like my others." I quickly added. I desperately added. "The Beginners were a small, tightly-knit guild. It was more like a family. The interactions were closer to what I got with my fellow Lieutenants and Executives. I grew close to all of you. You made me care. You didn't try and abuse my skills. Once you accepted them in Zeppil, I could finally be myself. I didn't have to pretend to be weak or hesitant. I just… couldn't be a Lieutenant. I cared more as we went on. We kissed because I wanted you to feel like you weren't alone. It was completely genuine." I wanted him to know that more than anything else. "I didn't want to be fake anymore."

"I grew to care for you, Cobb." I kept going, the words coming directly from the heart. They were always there, just beneath the surface, yearning to break through my calloused shell and be known. "You weren't like Jack. I felt safe with you. I wanted to be with you more. I wanted to protect you. I did everything to keep you safe. If I have one regret it… it would be that it took me so long to realize what you mean to me. No, it's… I regret going into this thinking you were all marks. I wish I could have done both and cared for both sides. Cultist AND Beginner."

"But you don't regret the killing."

His words were like a bucket of ice-cold water. That's what stuck to him?

"…It's not killing. It's sending them off to a new life." I answered, fighting to keep my voice under control. "I believe in 'Next Life'. This life is only fleeting. If you'd all just get that, then you'd see that nothing irreparable has been done. Mirabelle and Nephrait and all the others, they're experiencing a new life in the next realm. There's no reason to be angry."

"Except, Mirabelle and Beican might not be together. You separated a married couple. You broke up true love to keep this," he pointed between the two of us, "going. They'll have to find one another again because you orchestrated their deaths in this life."

"They'll find one another again."

"But will it be the same them?"

"Even if the body changes, the soul persists. They might not remember or know it's them, but their souls will feel the connection. If not in the next life, then the life or lives after."

"The Endward Cult or the Beginners? Which one?"

His latest question had me shutting my eyes in denial. It was a question I kept wondering to myself in my wildest dreams.

"…Please don't make me choose. Ember taught me to stand up for myself. She taught me how to fight. She's my friend. She looked out for me. She gave me her weapon. She's my Executive. I feel like I belong with the Endward Cult."

"And us?"

"The Beginners are my friends." I assured instantly. "I've fought beside you all. I've helped you out of tough spots—I've done the dirty things you couldn't to protect you because I cared. And I care about you, Cobb. The training, the dates, the dance, the flirting, the kisses, the nights we shared each other's warmth." I felt a rush of affection for the impassive fisherman before me, so why wasn't he feeling the same? Why wasn't he professing anything? "I love you. I love you!"

Why did he ignore that and go on to the next question!? Did he... did he even believe me anymore?

"Did you only grow close to me because you thought I was the Billionth? Does knowing that another is the Billionth change anything?"

"No, it—I mean, it changed something, but not how I felt for you." I hurried to explain. "If anything, it made me want to bring you over to my side even more!"

"Your side?"

"I meant the Endward Cult's side."

"You just said your side."

"I meant to say the Endward Cult's side!" I bawled. "You can join us. You and your friends. You're not the Billionth, so the others have no reason to distrust you. You already stood up for Herobrine—you know he wasn't all bad. You're halfway to becoming one of us." The words came out in a rush of desperation. "If you join us and rise through the ranks with the skills I taught you and a Hacker by your side, you can become an Executive no problem! Join the Endward Cult and we can change Minecraftia together! You don't have to run and hide from the Angel or Kingdoms anymore. They'll be the ones running scared! And they'll regret ever hunting you down. Please, Cobb, join for me. Do it, and we can spend every day together. Full disclosure and honesty. No more secrets."

"Because I'm not the Endward Cult's destroyer."

"Yes!"

"Because I'm not the Billionth."

"Yes!"

"Because I'm not Noman."

"Ye—!" I stopped short, but I was too late. The damage was already done.

"What'll happen to Noman?"

"I… I don't know." I admitted. "Ember will probably want him to locate Herobrine, but… after that, Noman would have to die. He'd be too big a risk." i struggled to explain. "The Endward Cult wouldn't accept him. Not least of all because of his code of pacifism and that destructive artifact given to him by Notch. B-But, maybe I can convince Ember to—"

"I'd never join the Endward Cult." Noman said—I forgot he and the others were even there. "I'd never allow them to go on killing Crafters. All life is precious, Jade."

"Same here." Floyd echoed. "The world already fears Hackers. Joining the Endward Cult would just be a retread of everything I hate about my powers. And after what happened to Silent—"

"Oh, Herobrine above! Are you even listening?" I cursed, fed up with explaining this one point of dispute over and over. "None of the dead are truly dead, guys! They've moved on to a new life. Silent is probably waiting on you and Soul to show up—"

"Don't talk about Silent." Floyd warned, his smoke wafting off of him. I ignored him, though.

"None of what we're doing is permanent. None of what we're doing is wrong. We're ferrymen, ferrying passengers from one side of the river to the other. Death isn't the end. The only way forward is endward."

"There is no moving forward from this, Jade." Floyd said.

"You claim that the soul persists without any credible evidence." Lenz went on. "It sounds more like conjecture. Even Redstone Engineers have to operate based on substantial evidence. Without experiments to test a hypothesis, it can only be guesswork. There is no return."

"I'd love to think that Winslow isn't truly gone." Noman added. "I want to believe he's in a better place, but joining the Endward Cult and killing more won't help that. It'll only add to the pile that I have no way of knowing is in this life or the next."

"Have a little faith." I assured. "Stranger things than Next Life have happened, people."

"Why should I believe anything you've said or will say when you can lie so effortlessly?" Cobb asked suddenly, moving us off the topic of dispute. He wanted to know why he should trust me.

"Because this is full disclosure." I answered back with no hesitation. "All of it. From the heart. And you know it."

At my words, Cobb frowned deeply and there was the makings of a scowl forming.

"I know it? I thought I knew a lot, but I really didn't. I thought I knew you, but I really didn't. Instead I thought with my heart rather than my head. That's right, Jade. I loved you. I loved you right back. I would have done anything for you—maybe even some of the same things you did for me. But I don't know if I love you or the fake you."

"There was no fake me!" I screamed. "It was just Beginner Jade or Lieutenant Jade near the end. But both of them loved you, and both of them still love you!"

Again, Cobb gripped his chest and swayed. He shrugged it off faster, however, and had his response ready.

"…I believe you."

My heart soared. "Then—!"

"But I can't join the Endward Cult."

"…"

"The people I care for. They care for others. They want to protect more than they want to destroy." He explained infuriatingly. "They would never be alright with what the Endward Cult is doing. But more than that, I… can't accept what you're doing."

I flinched as if struck. "What…?"

"I build bridges. I put worth in connections and relationships. The bond is the strongest thing for me. But for you, you… break."

"…"

"You splinter. You tear asunder. Guilds and Crafters are torn apart due to your actions." Each point had me curling in upon myself. "And you just… kept doing it. You kept pretending to be something you're not to infiltrate and poison whatever you touch. So what if they were jerks who used you? If you felt that uncomfortable working with them, you should have told Ember as much and dropped it! Nobody made you take the work. Nobody made you befriend people just to stab them in the back."

"I-I had to! It was my mission!"

"Then maybe the Endward Cult were just using you too!"

I gasped at the accusation. How... how dare he... The Endward Cult was the first place I felt I belonged. Ember never manipulated me into doing anything I didn't want!

"You and I… You breaking bonds and me forging them." Cobb went on, ignorant of my internal flash of anger. "We're so… dissimilar. But we love each other. And… I wish you'd just told me this from the start. Or if not then, then when you started having second thoughts. But you only had those second thoughts because you're in love, not because you realized that killing is wrong. And… it's not the ideal way, but it's something. I want you to change your mind. I want you to figure it out on your own. I want you to give up on being a breaker and just be a Beginner. No more killing Newbs. No more gathering Heads. No more betraying people. Not even the Endward Cult if you decide to side with us."

I blinked in surprise, the words confusing me. What was he suggesting?

"That's right, Jade. You're not swaying me. I'm swaying you. I want you to stay with the Beginners. I want you to leave the Endward Cult because they're muddying the bright soul I've seen within you. And… I'm not gonna lie, it'll be hard." He spared a glance to the Beginners behind him. "Joining us and acting like nothing happened. It'll probably be the hardest thing any of us have ever done. Trying to make this okay. Trying to make this work. It'll be a hell of a lot harder than just swinging swords at one another. But… but I want you to see that you're on the wrong side of things. Remember all the good we did as the Beginners, even if you were just pretending to be one. Only this time, you'll be one for real. And… and we won't ask you to betray your Executive or the Endward Cult."

Floyd and Noman looked alarmed at that, but I beat them to it.

"But it'll happen. One way or another. You're going to fight us. That's what your friends want." I tilted my head down, glaring dully at the grass. "That's what you'll want."

"All I want right now is for you to forgive yourself and for us to start over."

"I can't just start over. After everything I've done. You're being selfish, Cobb." I chuckled humorlessly. "You're putting your wants ahead of all the people I've liberated. You're even putting yourself ahead of your friends. You think any of them want me around? Look at them!"

If he just turned around, he could see why this would never work out. The bridges had been long burnt. I burned them myself. But Cobb didn't give up.

"I want you around. And if you're willing to turn over a new leaf, they'll give you a chance."

"And that's your solution?" I scoffed. "After we tried to kill each other?"

"I almost killed Noman just the other day." He revealed. "But I didn't. And you didn't kill Floyd or Lenz. Nobody is dead."

"A lot of people are dead." I spoke coldly. "And I know you know that because you don't believe in Next Life like me. You, of all people, believe that those people are gone for good and yet to find it in yourself to forgive me." Another dry chuckle. "You really are too good for me, aren't you?"

"Please, Jade." He extended his arm, palm up. "Take my hand."

"…" I looked at it hesitantly, the weight of everything starting to crush the life out of me.

"Take it now while you still can. Take it and become a Beginner again. Take it and we can find a way to work this out. Together. Please, take it, Jade. Otherwise, I know you'll regret it for the rest of your life."

It was so tempting. The offer of a clean slate. And yet, I felt something holding me back from taking his hand and hugging the life out of him.

Maybe he and his friends could forgive me.

But I couldn't.

"…I can't."

"Yes, you can." He urged. "It's not too late."

"It is, though. You won't have me believe that all I've done is for nothing. It can't be. And I can't turn my back on Ember."

"Then…" His hand dropped, hanging loosely at his side. "That's it, isn't it?"

"Cobb, please…"

"No, Jade." He took a step back and away. The distance between us never felt larger. "I won't ask you to betray people. Not like your Executive made you do."

"Please," I begged. "Join us, Cobb. We can be together if you just—"

"I'm going to stop you, Jade." He cut off. "I'm going to stop you and your Executive. You won't have your way."

At that, I could only laugh bitterly. "You can't win against Ember, Cobb. She's even stronger than Carys and she can see through lies greater than my own. She can read anyone like a book."

"Then I guess I'll just have to have a twist ending for her."

"Pfft." I hid a snicker behind one hand. "That's corny, even for you."

"My name is Cobb." He pointed out with a forlorn smile. "But I'll make it happen."

That was it, then. Neither one of us could sway the other.

After today, we were enemies.

"And what about me?" I asked, looking pointedly to Floyd and the others. No more questions to ask. No more reason to keep me alive.

"As promised, you're free to go." Cobb gestured to the forest. "None of us will stop you."

"COBB!?" Floyd raged.

Lenz echoed that sentiment. "Cobbert, she knows too much. About Nowhere's mission and the artifacts. It would not be practical to just let her escape. We should capture her."

"We should kill her!"

"No." Cobb was above their anger. He should have wanted my blood the most. Why was he just letting me walk away? "She answered truthfully. She leaves. No fighting. No capturing. No killing."

"You sure? You might just regret it." I told him.

"Just go. I can't… I can't look at you anymore right now."

Ouch. That... actually hurt.

"…Okay." I nodded. "I'll leave, then."

"If I ever see you again, I'll be the last one." Floyd threatened. With Cobb giving his blessing for me to leave, he was little more than a muzzled dog.

I looked to Cobb as he averted his eyes and kept a stone cold silence.

"…Last chance to come with, Cobb."

Silence.

"Alright, your loss." I half-turned away, expecting some last string of words.

Silence.

I looked back. "…It really won't be all bad. The Cult. It'll be like a second family."

More silence.

"Plus, I'll be there." I added with a slight cough. Some sort of lump was forming in my throat. "I would have figured that'd be enough. Remember all the times we—?"

"GO!" Floyd screamed, smoke radiating off of him in pulsing waves.

"Alright, alright. I just… wanted…"

He really wasn't going to say anything else. He was just going to keep averting his eyes, ashamed to even take one last glance at me.

"...t-to…"

My voice trembled and my eyes misted, and yet he refused to give me the time of day. I snapped, then.

"DAMNIT COBB! Why aren't you screaming at me!?"

I rounded on him, completely ignoring how the Beginners armed themselves. I couldn't care less. I had tunnel vision and Cobb and his fucking refusal to acknowledge me kept setting me off, lending fuel to my anger.

"Why aren't you hurling the worst insults imaginable at me!?" I screamed.

More damn silence!

"Why are you just standing there with your mouth shut!? I can't tell what you're thinking! Would you just say something!? Anything would be better than this cold disappointment! ANYTHING!"

I was demented. I racked my brain for anything I could say to get a rise out of him. I wanted him to yell at me. I wanted anger! I wanted loathing! I wanted him to reign blows upon me if that would make him feel something!

"You think you're too good for insults!? Huh!? You think that by not screaming at me, you're the one in the right and I'm just the crazy, reptilian, psychopath killing Crafters!? That I should back down and take your hand and forgive myself!? Well I can't!"

It wasn't enough. He didn't utter a word. I had to dig deeper. I had to twist the dagger in just to get him to open his trap!

"Oooh, but you are good, Cobb! Too good! Too good to kill Mirabelle for the coal! Too good to frame an asshole like McGahn! Too good to kill Nephrait after she stabbed you in the back, just like you're too good to kill me now when you know we're just gonna have to fight one day!"

Nothing worked. He just kept that infuriating silence. Tears were streaming down my face as I screamed my throat raw.

"Still not gonna insult me!? Then I'll do it myself! After all, if we're truly dissimilar, then I'm just the cold-hearted bitch who preyed on Crafters' fears and weakness and played them time and time again to get what I wanted!" I threw my arms back and laughed. "My subdivision and I liberated tens of thousands of Crafters over the years and led guilds to ruin! You weren't the first person I kissed! What I did with you was tame compared with what I did with them! And they all died for it! Because I'm just a venomous, poisonous, toxic girlfriend! How does that make you feel!?"

He bit his lip, holding it all in. I was close. So close to making him explode.

"Well!? Are you still not going to say anything!? Agree, disagree, defend me, loathe me? Still not a peep from you? Lips sealed? No more words to fail!? What is it with you!? Why aren't you in tears!? Why aren't you an emotional wreck like me!? WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU!?"

"I—" He cut off and I almost goaded him further, but then he said the rest.

"…I just don't have the energy for it."

His words had my anger fizzle out into nothing.

"I'm not speaking from my Heart, Jade." He continued, still refusing to look me in the eye. "Right now… I've had to deaden my Heart, just to get everything out. My Heart's in the wrong place. I've just had to piece myself back together, and even I'm not sure I've picked up all the pieces. I don't feel anything except like shit. Gray, dismal shit. I'm mentally and emotionally exhausted. I just don't have the energy to be mad at you right now."

It felt like the ground had just opened up beneath me, swallowing me up to fall into some black, inescapable void. It wasn't that he was too good to be angry. It wasn't that he was too bad to claim what we had was nothing.

He was a broken man with a broken heart. And I was the one who smashed it.

"So I'm not going to yell at you, Jade." He whispered. How I wished he'd just scream at me. "I'm just saying bye."

"…I'm sorry."

It was all I could manage before I ran away from my mistakes. I ran and ran as fast as my toned legs could carry me. I ran so fast that my tears flecked off my face and into my billowing green hair. I ran away from the Beginners and my romance with Cobb and the broken heart I left in his chest.

But no matter how far I ran, I could never get away from the truth.

I was the lowest piece of garbage there was.

[Cobb]

My fleeting strength lasted as long as it took Jade to flee the scene. Then I collapsed onto my back.

"Hey, Cobb..." Noman said, full of compassion instead of alarm. He knew how much of an ordeal that talk had been. All the Beginners had seen me confront my girlfriend and say goodbye.

"...I thought I could change her mind." I mumbled, idly running a hand over my cheeks and coming up dry. I couldn't even cry. My Heart really was in the wrong place. There was no anger, either. No Blood.

"She meant a lot to you..." Noman said, kneeling down. "It's okay to cry. You don't have to hold it in around us."

"Yeah, we won't think less of you." Floyd nodded before attempting to break the tension with a joke. "We're not Soul, after all."

The joke wasn't funny or properly timed, but even if it was, I wouldn't have laughed. I had no mirth. No grief, but also no joy.

If I reclaimed my Heart, I'd be feeling the worst kind of pain—the kind that couldn't be replenished with a few potions and porkchops. I was better off without that burdensome organ. The others seemed to think something was wrong with my dead eyes and lack of emotion, but I couldn't be better. I wasn't an emotional wreck like Jade was. I could think clearly with my Brain.

What good was a broken Heart anyway?

"We should have caught her." Lenz said, looking to where Jade had vanished in the treeline. "She knows so much about us."

"I would have done it, you know." Floyd stressed, kneeling down to my level beside Noman. "I'd get it if you couldn't, Cobb. Lenz and I, we could have... you know... made it quick."

I did know. I knew exactly what he meant. I had thrown the idea around on the walk over. In the end, though, I couldn't go through with it. Not with someone I fought with. Not with someone I loved with. It would have been the same if any of them landed the killing blow. Jade would haunt them for the rest of their lives. Who cares that she was a traitor working with the Endward Cult. Killing her would compromise the others in some way. They might say otherwise, but it would. It definitely would.

Better to just let her go.

"I'm sorry you couldn't convince her." Noman lamented. "But I'm proud that you tried. Where there's life, there's hope."

"She will be going back to the Endward Cult." Lenz reasoned. "We could have deprived them of a powerful ally. Instead, she will be going back with gifts. She knows who the Angel of Death is. She knows about Nowhere and the artifacts. She knows we have that trilogy of Herobrine books—remember she wanted copies." Lenz took out the books and looked to them contemplatively. He flipped to the jumbled text of the back pages. "I wonder why the interest...?"

"If she goes back to the Endward Cult, we won't have to hold anything back." Noman said resolutely.

"Yeah, she made her choice." Floyd said before looking down. "I can't believe she killed Mirabelle and Beatrix. She even comforted Delaney! All the while knowing she killed her friends. That snake..."

"She confessed to a lot." I commented, leaning on Noman as he helped me up. "Honestly, though... her admitting she loved me was probably the hardest."

"Really? Why?"

"It would have been easier to hate her if it was always fake from the start." I sighed. "Budding feelings just complicated matters. Either way, that was the real Jade that just blew up at me."

"You should have blown up right back."

"Don't have the energy." I repeated.

"Well, we will let you get plenty of rest in the airship." Lenz assured before glancing to the sun as it dipped beneath the horizon. "We should head back, though. Mobs will be out soon."

"That... sounds nice." I sighed, letting Noman and Floyd help carry me. "Hey, I want to go to Ringwood."

"Wasn't that always the plan?"

"No, I mean... I really want to go to Ringwood." I tried to make them understand. "I don't care about being wanted. I just want to enter that kingdom and meet with Wynn. I want to tell her everything and..." I trailed off, unsure of what I really wanted right now. My emotions had no outlet.

"You want her to comfort you." Floyd filled in.

I nodded as we exited the clearing and into the thick Birch Forest. Lenz was leading the way, his bow drawn and keeping an eye out for Mobs.

"I feel like she might be experienced enough to know what I'm going through." I offered in lieu of explanation. "I want to talk with someone new. I want her opinion on things. I want... I want to know if I'm doing this right..."

"Doing what right?" Noman asked hesitantly. "Cobb, you can cry, alright? Just let it out. Bottling things up won't do you any good."

"...I can't."

"Yes, you can. There's no shame in—"

"No, I mean I really can't. I shut down my Heart." They didn't know about the organ voices. I needed some other way to explain. But how could I explain the bizarre dream sequence that lasted four days? "I compartmentalized my emotions..."

"Compartmentalwhat?" Floyd asked. "What are you talking ab—ow!?"

Floyd rubbed his nose after suddenly walking into Lenz's back. The engineer had stopped cold, his head swiveling around a seemingly ordinary group of trees. However, judging by his erratic movements, I could tell something was wrong.

Something was very wrong.

"Where's the airship?"

[Jade]

I was the lowest piece of garbage there was.

I wiped furiously at my tears as I piloted the Asmodeus. All those piloting lessons with Lenz had paid off. Flying in a straight line was hardly a problem, and my straight line flight pattern was putting the Birch Forest and the Beginners far behind me.

My map was still stashed in my ender chest. No way to track me. Noman might try to catch up with his Bottes Zephyr, but there was a difference between flying up to a stationary airship and flying up to a moving airship with a head start.

Even if he did try and show up, he could only carry maybe one person with him. I had enough paralysis potions for that. I was so torn up, I could kill any of them without a thought.

Not if Cobb was with them.

Just thinking of his name brought on wretched pains in my chest and fresh tears. I wiped at my face with my sleeve, glaring furiously through hot tears as I aimed the Asmodeus for Mt. Mur and the kingdom beyond. I may have failed my mission, but I got some great souvenirs. Less than those Herobrine books, but more than the Beginners would ever guess.

"I bet they're wishing they killed me now." I half boasted, half cried to myself. Fuck. I couldn't let the cult see me like this. Especially not 4Blite.

It was true. I was the lowest piece of garbage there was.

Time to test just how low I could go.

Inventory (Cobb): 1 Book {Mission Update}, 1 Leather Tunic [Dyed Green, Mending I, Unbreaking I], 1 Diamond Leggings [Projectile Protection IV], 1 Iron Boots, 1 Fishing Rod {Backlash} [Knockback II, Luck of the Sea III, Unbreaking III], 1 Diamond Sword [Sweeping Edge III], 1 Banner {Beginners}, 64 Cobblestone, 61 Cobblestone, 1 Bed, 36 Dirt, 6 Coal, 18 Flint, 12 Jungle Wood Logs, 56 Jungle Wood Planks, 7 Torches, 1 Crafting Table, 1 Clock, 1 Lava Bucket, 1 String, 60 Emeralds, 1 Ender Chest, 4 Snowballs, 9 Gunpowder, 7 Raw Porkchops, 22 Rotten Flesh, 1 Book {How to Kill Stuff for Numb Nuts}, 1 Book {Advanced Mob-Slaying}, 1 Book {Mobs of the Nether}, 1 Map {Minecraftia}, 1 Book {Citizenship Information}, 1 Paper {Ringwood Entry Pass}, 1 Paper {Zeppil Entry Pass}

[EXP: 28]

Inventory (Floyd): 1 Mob Head {Creeper}, 1 Diamond Helmet [Projectile Protection IV], 1 Diamond Chestplate [Projectile Protection IV], 1 Diamond Leggings [Projectile Protection IV], 1 Iron Boots, 1 Iron Pickaxe, 3 Iron Ingots, 47 Dirt, 1 Fishing Rod, 1 Furnace, 2 Cooked Mutton, 1 Crafting Table, 1 Minecart, 1 Bed, 1 Boat, 1 Emerald, 1 Iron Sword {Weak}, 1 Diamond Boots [Projectile Protection IV], 1 Iron Leggings, 16 Gunpowder, 3 Ender Pearls, 1 Splash Potion of Invisibility {6:00}, 1 Iron Chestplate, 1 Iron Leggings, 1 Map {Minecraftia}, 1 Book {Citizenship Information}, 1 Paper {Ringwood Entry Pass}, 1 Paper {Zeppil Entry Pass}

[EXP: 32]

Inventory (Lenz): 1 Leather Pants [Dyed Brown, Curse of Binding I, Unbreaking III] {Weak}, 1 Leather Boots [Dyed Brown, Curse of Binding I, Unbreaking III], 1 Shears, 2 Levers, 5 Redstone Torches, 1 Bed, 9 Redstone Repeaters, 3 Redstone Comparators, 23 Redstone, 17 Blocks of Redstone, 2 Hoppers, 3 Pistons, 2 Sticky Pistons, 48 Cobblestone, 1 Minecart, 1 Compass, 25 Gunpowder, 1 Bow, 21 Arrows, 14 Jungle Wood Planks, 1 Crafting Table, 5 Cooked Mutton, 64 Emeralds, 1 Ender Chest, 1 Map {Minecraftia}, 1 Book {Airship Piloting 101}, 1 Book {Notebook}, 1 Book {How to Kill Stuff for Numb Nuts}, 1 Book {Advanced Mob-Slaying}, 1 Book {Mobs of the Nether}, 1 Book {Citizenship Information}, 1 Paper {Daymonte Entry Pass}, 1 Paper {Ringwood Entry Pass}, 1 Paper {Zeppil Entry Pass}, 1 Paper {Akasha Entry Pass}

[EXP: 15]

Inventory (Noman): 1 Diamond Sword [Sharpness I], 1 Diamond Chestplate {Severe Shield}, 1 Leather Boots {Bottes Zephyr} [Dyed White], 1 Black Shield {Slight Shield} [Blue Cross] {Weak}, 1 Flint and Steel, 1 Bow [Infinity], 1 Bucket, 1 Bed, 1 Crafting Table, 2 Ender Pearls, 1 Phantom Membrane, 1 Splash Potion of Healing II, 1 Splash Potion of Healing II, 1 Splash Potion of Healing II, 1 Splash Potion of Healing II, 1 Splash Potion of Healing II, 1 Splash Potion of Healing II, 1 Splash Potion of Healing II, 1 Splash Potion of Regeneration II {0:22}, 1 Splash Potion of Regeneration II {0:22}, 1 Splash Potion of Regeneration II {0:22}, 2 Cooked Porkchops, 1 Book {Citizenship Information}, 1 Paper {Zeppil Entry Pass}, 1 Paper {Akasha Entry Pass}, 1 Arrow, 1 Map {Minecraftia}, 4 Enchanted Golden Apples, 1 Diamond Helmet, 1 Diamond Leggings, 1 Diamond Boots

[EXP: 26]

AN: How much suffering do you - ?

Y E S

I'm expecting a lot of Jade hate in the reviews and discord. Yes, she stole the Asmodeus, and she's left a poor, broken-hearted young man. Poor Lenz...

Oh, and Cobb, I guess.

Next time, the Darkest Arc will fulfill an old promise of mine. One I intend to keep. No matter how much it hurts...

Look forward to it, dear readers.

FAV. FOLLOW. REVIEW. PM. FORUM. DISCORD. SERVER. POPTARTS.