Merlins POV

This day was not going how I had hoped, I stared at the trees willing the pain from the magical push to wash away and climbing to me feet to protect Arthur. Both the knights were fighting morgana, surprisingly not thrown off by the fact that they were still standing.

"Wait." Morgana shorted stopping her defense, "I think we have a lot to discuss"

Morganas eyes found mine, emotions swerling in her eyes, regret, anger, confusion, and hope.

She's still looking at me when she says

"Infact let's all take a seat and talk"

That morning*

This trip hadn't gone as planned. You send Arthur to get a few horses and he comes back with not only the horses but also gwain.

Can he do anything by himself?

As I thought my ruful and frankly somewhat vogulger thoughts, gwain sat on his dappled mare trotting along.

This was all after our talk about my magic, goddess he knows about my magic. Arthur 'can't keep a secret for ten minutes' pendragon knows that I can use magic and I am still alive and well.

"Arthur"

I jumped in my saddle looking over at gwain who for once had been mostly silent for the horse ride.

"I forgot to ask, where are we going anyway?"

My jaw hit the dirt, I had to take a deep breath before I said. "Arthur didn't even tell you we were going to fight morgana?!" I waited for gwain to say "gotcha mate! I know we were going to be fighting her."

But he just looked excited. He turned on his horse to face Arthur. "you should have led with that mate" his jesting tone removing any accusations from his words. He turn back to me "now Merl's tell me, what is it like kissing a king?" His eyes exposed his attempt to restrain his mirth.

"GWAIN! SO HELP ME ONE MORE WORD AND I WILL THROW YOU IN THE STOCK'S"

As if he was enchanted Gwain kicked his horse into a light trout, shouting over his shoulder "so hostile to your courters best friend, that's no way to win his heart." Half finished he had to kick his horse into a full gallop to escape a red faced Arthur.

I simply watch them as they ride away, still shocked at all of it. Arthur knew, Gwain would know soon, and yet here I was. Alive and well with no threat of burning, watching my best friends jesting like always.

I pinched myself just to make sure I was awake. "ouch."

Rubbing the abused flesh as I kicked my horse into a gallop and caught up in time to hear Ather say "alright, that's it! You are forbidden from going to the tavern for a whole fort night!"

You would have thought he had sentenced Gwain to death by pyre. After a quick pause he got a mischievous look on his face, "well then I guess Merlin will have to swipe me some when he goes. Which is only when you are being a brat, on second thought that might be too often"

Arthur just rolled his eyes and looked at Merlin, "so how does this work? Do you need anything for it? I mean you know..."

"Nothing, just myself."

Gwain looked at him then at me and suddenly his face light up with an epiphany. "Oh so the slow sod finally figured it out! Lance owes my a pint of ale."

Gwain looked over to arthurs and my shocked face, "what, youve been using magic since I first met you, the more magical thing is how Arthur took so long to see it."

"Hey!" The indignice in his voice was clear.

I just sat there, first Arthur, now Gwain? Would I have been able to make magic legal if I had just asked? Could I have been working with them this whole time?!

"Nothing, just myself."

After a shaky inhale I changed topics fast enough to cause whiplash. "We should get going if we want to reach Morgana's before the pultus wares off."

"Merl-"

I do the location spell without uttering a word, unable to talk about this right now. "Come on it's this way" I point out the direction as a kick my horse into a gallop.

So desperate to leave the conversation behind that I missed Arthur and Gwain share a sad look.

AN: im a ghost, now you see me know you dont.

hi guys, as i mentioned this one is very slow going cause of college and general life things but at last, a new chapter for you guys.

one of the most challenging things about writing a fanfic of character i already love is writing revels that are true to the characters.

im not sure if i got these ones right but I did my best!

see you in who knows how long! and thank you for sticking with it