LIGHTHOUSE
chapter 19
The hours following their departure from the hospital didn't turn out to be as smooth as Maria and Georg had hoped them to be. The journey in itself had been the easier part despite the challenges it posed, but getting to the train stattion proved to be a major struggle.
Max's sprained ankle slowed their progress considerably. His pace, though not ideal nor adequate for catching the train on time, it seemed to align surprisingly well with Maria's rhythms and diminished energy levels. This was the very first time she was walking a longer distance after her stay in the hospital, but her stamina was nowhere near to its usual levels - she quickly grew winded and out of breath, needing continuous pauses to catch her breat and take a rest. The best way to make it through was to take frequent breaks that allowed both Maria and Max to recover a little and then resume walking at a relatively fast pace, Georg's arm steadily secured around his wife's waist and eyes ever vigilant, alert to scan for any sign of danger.
Despite their efforts, boarding the train was only the beginning of their trials, the moment they got on they understood they were in for a bumpy ride. Georg had wished to offer them a higher-class cabin for their journey, but it would have been too risky, he'd already seen several controllers pacing around the wagon corridors, inspecting for identification and tickets, a control that wouldn't have been just as strict if the three of them, two of which visibly injured, travelled in a third class old, cramped, and rackety cabin.
Max entered first, stretching his leg forward in the narrow compartment and maneuvering his crutches to set them at his side, followed by Georg that after ensuring Maria had sat down completely, raised the small suitcase and put it on the train hatbox. When he joined Maria on their bench she immediately sank into his side, exhausted from the exertion of walking such a lenght. Looking down at her he noticed her chest raising and falling at a fast pace in an attempt to steady her breath after the effort endured.
- "You're alright?" Georg asked in a voice laced with worry, his hand running up and down her shivering arm as she nodded wearily, "you look exhausted darling, why don't you try and get some rest?"
- "No, I'm staying right here with you" she disagreed immediately.
Her breath came in ragged gasps, betraying her exhaustion, yet she insisted on staying by his side.
- "Darling, this is a long journey, it is going to take quite some time. And once we get to Raphael, I doubt the children will hardly leave you a moment's" he reasoned and considered, his lips quirking into a faint grin.
It was true, the children would have been beyond excited to see her again and he knew his hardest efforts needed to be doubled if he wanted to achieve just as much as walking her over the entrance door.
- "I can't wait to see them" she beamed in delight, already savouring the joy she would feel at seeing the seven of them again as her fatigue was momentarily forgotten
- "I know you do" he smiled against her crown, "but sleep now" he then softly urged her.
He needed her to get that rest, the trip would have taken its toll on her otherwise, with consequences not even Doctor Lehmann could have foreseen.
Reluctantly Maria closed her eyes, her long curled eyelashes fluttering close as she succumbed to the lull of the train's rhythmic motion. Sleep claimed her for long restoring hours as Georg watched over her, grateful for those precious moments of tranquility amidst the uncertainty of their journey.
The bustling Parisian avenue greeted them with its enchanting charm. Dimly lit by the glow of streetlamps, the cobblestone sidewalk shimmered with raindrops, casting a magical aura over the city. What a sight to behold, they thought to themselves as they left the train station and entered the city centre. Despite the chill in the air, there was a warmth to the autumnal evening that wrapped around them like a comforting embrace - it all looked so familiar.
Once approached, the carved wooden door in front of them opened wide enough just to allow a pair of female hands to shake crumbles off a tablecloth and a pair of eyes to pop out of that narrow space to carefully watch her movements. But when those same eyes raised, they widened in surprise, quickly prickling with tears. Carmen gasped for the excitement and in a split second her mouth opened ready to scream, incredulous at the sight in front of her.
- "Shh!" Maria promptly stopped her bringing a finger to her lips, a wide smile passing a silent agreement between them - this would be a surprise for the children.
Carmen smiled too, opening the door further with trembling hands to usher the three of them inside with movements ever so silent. Not even the time to step over the door arch that Maria's gaze immediately drawn to the sight of her children, her heart threatened to explode if she didn't hold them right there and then. She had missed those angels with every fiber of her soul, and they were unconsciously welcoming her already with one of her very favourite things: gathered around the table, their voices lifted in song as they set plates and cutlery down for dinner.
La a note to follow so, Ti I drink with jam and bread and- …
- "That will bring us back to Do".
The voice they loved the most in the entire universe filled their ears and finished the tune, thick and quivering with emotion, but still unfailing in warming their hearts with love in a matter of seconds.
The children froze mid-action, their eyes widening in disbelief as they turned to see their mother standing in the doorway. Plates, napkins and glasses clattered to the ground, forgotten as they rushed to her side, their arms enveloping her in a tight embrace.
Seven pairs of little arms wrapped around her, the tightest embrace she had ever been in – stuffing their heads in her neck, leaning into her sides, clutching at her legs – they had all crushed into her open embrace with such intensity that she might as well have been knocked down on the floor. Tears began to stream down immediately afterwards like a tidal wave, soaking every inch of her clothes with a shared happiness that felt like the most powerful thing she had ever felt within herself. Two other arms, strong and affectionate soon joined the embrace, holding and crushing them all into him as Georg approached them.
In that moment, time seemed to stand still as they held each other close, savouring the sweetness of their reunion. They were a family once more.
They were reunited at last. Now, they were complete.
- "We missed you all so much!" Maria managed to choke out after several long minutes. Brigitta and Martha's hands loosened on her just enoughh for her to caress each of their cheeks, her touch a gentle reassurance amidst the overwhelming rush of feelings.
- "We missed you too" the children echoed, their voices a chrus of longing and relief
- "We were scared you'd never come back"
- "We were so impatient to hear your voice again" another chimed in
- "We have so many things to tell you!"
The seven voices overlapped in a jumble of excitement impossible to comprehend for everyone but Maria, she welcomed the joyous chaos and embraced each word and gesture with a heart full of of love. Despite the pounding in her head and the ache in her body, she wouldn't have it be any other way. She needed to take in all their beautiful features again – their smiles, the sparkle in their eyes, the colours of their hair, their heavenly voices – it was like falling in love with them all over again but already knowing they would have been the only people she would have loved for the rest of her life.
The children felt the same way, they couldn't stop squeezing, crushing, and nuzzling into their parents, and as Georg had foreseen, Maria had indeed been trapped right on the spot and still hadn't made a single step forward since their arrival.
- "Children, be careful, you mother is still unwell" his eyes unblinking on Maria as he cautioned, his voice gentle but firm and eyes watching over with a mixture of amusement and concern.
She rolled her eyes back at him adorably, a smile tugging at the corners of her lips despite the ache in her head. She was grateful for Georg's concern, yet she simply couldn't tear herself away from the warmth of their children's embrace.
- "I knew Father would save you!" Brigitta came to hold her hand tight into hers
- "Oh, I am so happy to see you darling" Maria choked out again, "I'm sorry".
It was then that Maria's body crumbled, all she wished was to bury herself into the warmth of their little bodies and never let go. Her head leaned against Liesel's and a new flow of tears was spilled, this time filled with guilt instead of joy.
Soon Georg's hand was at the small of her head to soothe her with caresses, deep inside she knew it wasn't her fault, but her husband was there to remind her whenever she would need it.
The rest of Raphael's family had remained standing around them, Carmen making sure her two little girls remained on their seats and didn't break the touching moment the family was experiencing, tears of genuine emotion streaming down her own cheeks as she looked at them with a big proud smile.
- "Well, doesn't anyone come and say hello to me?".
Their eyes had been so full of tears that none of the seven children had noticed that Max had been quietly standing behind their parents as well, unnoticed, they had no clue on why he was there too but all they knew was that they wanted to hug him too.
Maria's eyes kept spilling deluge after deluge of tears, happiness dazing her in overwhelming waves that caused her to rely entirely on Georg's safe grip of her not to fall down and surrender to her buckling legs.
While the children were welcoming Max, the Bergers took advantage of that surely rare spare time to greet Georg and Maria back, Carmen shifting her from his embrace to hers to hold the young woman as if she were her own daughter.
- "What in the world is all this noise? All the neighbourhood is hearin- …"
The sound of a door suddenly opening allowed Raphael's voice to filter in. His eyes widened as they landed on Maria, his expression shifting from confusion to disbelief in the blink of an eye. Without a second thought, he simply dropped the loaf of bread he has just bought, his sole focus on the miracolous sight before him.
He just couldn't believe it.
- "Thank Heavens, Maria" he pulled her into his embrace, tears streaming down his weathered cheeks.
It was the second time she had seen him crying and she couldn't help but cry more at the sight of him, burying herself in relief into his strong embrace, allowing herself to be swept away by the flood of emotions.
- "Ah" she softly winced when one of his hands brought her face to his neck, inadvertently brushing against her wound, but she did not let it bother her in the lightest and she let herself be guided by his touch, "oh, Uncle, I'm so happy to see you again"
- "I am too, little one, I am too".
Georg stared at the two of them, a sense of gratitute washing over him as he realized he'd made the right choice in entrusting Raphael to care for the children during their absence, that man loved Maria as his own daughter, his affection for her was unmistakable in his eyes as well as in his movements.
The two families were now complete and reunited under one roof, but it seemed that for Maria hugs and cuddles weren't over yet.
- "Aunt Maria, we missed you too!" Else screamed as she jumped off her chair following her brother Erwin in rushing toward Maria.
Louisa, being the youngest of all the children in the room hadn't paid any kind of attention and had flung herself into Maria's arms wrapping both her little arms and legs around her lower body, causing her to gasp in surprise again at the sudden unbalance.
- "I missed you too" she groaned as she eased the little girl better into her arms.
Maria stared at their sweet faces for some moments before her eyes could meet Georg's, lovingly scolding her for the strain she was putting herself through. Well, Louisa was a feather weight normally but with her energies still running low she seemed to weight as much as Kurt. She couldn't help to justify her excitement with a thoughtful gaze but this time she didn't found Georg behind her, as he was a few steps away, lingering in a deep hug with Raphael.
- "I cannot express my gratitude enough, Raphael"
- "You don't have to! I'd do anything for Maria and her family, truly" the man turned his head to the side to meet her sight, still standing up, still surrounded by eleven elated children, "she is very special" he continued sincerely
- "I know …" a lovesick smile crossed Georg's lips as he watched her, "she really is".
After what felt like an eternity of greetings, Carmen finally managed to extricate Maria from the tight huddle of children, walking to lead her and Georg to the upper floor.
Georg had intended to be the one guiding his wife up there, but the moment their soles stomped over the long carpet in the corridor, Carmen was quick to take charge, her arm linking Maria's and walking her ahead of Georg, causing her to silently giggle at him when her arm inevitably slipped away from his own.
- "I've set the guest room for you every week in case of your return ... It's the one on the far left, and it's not too far from the children's so that you can keep an eye on them if you want. There are fresh sheets on the bed and clean clothes for you to change in, I doubted mine would fit you, but Rita has given you some of her old dresses" Carmen spoke incessantly, her hand smoothing caresses on the back of Maria's as they walked further into the corridor and finally entered the room.
It was a sight almost worth of a dream. After the narrow cot of her hospital room, that double bed seemed large enough to comfortably fit all of the seven children, and Maria could have collapsed onto it right that very moment. She could feel the exhaustion seeping into her bones and she couldn't wait to sink into the softness of that thick mattress on the bed. It stood between two bedside tables matching with the high drawer and the wardrobe on the far wall, while at the opposing corners two wide armchairs were set, heavy curtains at the large windows and a small vanity as well. Maria could have hardly told this was not the former bedroom.
- "The bathroom is there and there's all you need to take a bath if you'd like one before dinner" Carmen continued.
Maria's mind was about to burst for how many information she was being given all at once, but the excitement and genuine care in the woman's eyes as she delivered them was warming her heart deeply and all she was able to feel was gratefulness for what that family was doing for her own.
- "You must be exhausted, sweetheart, I hope you'll be able to rest comfortably here" the woman traced Maria's jawline with her fingers in a caring caress, "but if there's anything you need, you just knock the door in front of your room, Raphael and I sleep there, and you can call us anytime"
- "Carmen, this is perfect. Thank you so much for all you're doing, we deeply appreciate it" Maria smiled warmly, giving back a caress as thoughtful as the one the woman had been spoiling her with
- "We'll be waiting for you downstairs" she smiled back before turning on her heels and making her way out of the room and into the corridor.
When the door closed, Georg's eyes met Maria's in the split second that divided her from taking a long step and throwing herself on the bed with another, a groan escaping her mouth as she sunk in the softness of the mattress and relieved her tired body
- "Oh, I needed this" she breathed out, unable to move a muscle from how comfortable she was there.
Georg couldn't help but chuckle softly at the sight, it was the same exact thing she'd done the day they had arrived at their hotel after a long walk through the beautiful Parisian avenues and it was nothing less than delightful to see her laying there beneath him, adorably tired.
- "I don't think going down for dinner is a good idea" he then spoke up, slipping off his coat and dropping it to the floor
- "But I want to stay with the children" she complied, childish and adorable as she could be when she playfully pouted
- "Maria …" he began to object
- "Please" she begged, preventing him from listing all the valid reasons she knew he had to stop her, "please".
Georg could see the fatigue in her eyes, yet he couldn't deny her anything when she looked at him like that. Those doe eyes were the death of him, he had no power whenever their shining blue engulfed and warmed his icy ones.
- "I'll come back here as soon as I feel tired, I promise" she tried to reason as he brushed a stray lock of hair from her forehead.
But funnily enough, she wasn't even halfway through her sentence that a rather large yawn took over her, altering her voice amusingly as she fought to keep it at bay.
When it was over her eyes were back on Georg's, his lips pursed into a line but one that smiled, consciously, lovingly, and yet gently mocking. One of his brows was raised and his eyes sparkled with his familiar wit.
She shouldn't have moved from there at all being already that exhausted.
Georg went as far as to open his mouth to speak before she could stop him.
- "No no, don't say a word" she hushed him, throwing herself back to her former position once her elbows had stopped to sustain her.
Eventually, Maria became so insistent about her plans for the evening that after taking a short bath, both she and Georg joined the others downstairs for dinner.
And once she was back among them, everything went crazy once more.
Even sitting down at the table became an impossible task since even while Georg was sitting by her side, the seat at her other side was free and none of the eleven children intended to miss the chance of dining next to her. She ended up eating most of her dinner with Gretl or Louisa sat on each of her legs and Martha often settled on Brigitta's lap at her side.
She spared herself nothing and was more than delighted to do so, but by the time dessert was being served and the men were planning for some table games, she was utterly exhausted. Her forehead pressed against the palm of her hand as her fingers gripped it, hoping it would somehow lessen the pain, her eyes squeezing and blinking incessantly as her headaches alternated high peaks and tough lows.
Georg noticed it immediately and all it took was one firm yet kind glance for her to understand that it was time to oblige his orders.
- "Alright, I'll say goodnight" she spoke up, raising her hands up in surrender.
Leaving the children down there with just a kiss to their cheeks and plenty of I love yous knowing that she wouldn't have settled them to sleep for another night pained her, but if she was being honest with herself, she desperately needed to lay down, let her lids to shut and allow herself to fall into a deep slumber. Her body was demanding her to do so and there was very little her mind could do about it.
Rita had kindly offered to bring her a cup of hot chamomile to help her settle since the painkillers didn't seem to work their tricks in keeping her headaches at bay, but when she had entered the guest bedroom, poor Maria was so exhausted that not even the painful pounding in her head could have stopped her from collapsing into profound sleep. Hans had been browsing through some of the medical papers he'd left at home but not even he could find a way different from the painkillers she had been already given to help her feel better. She had unsurprisingly pushed herself over the edge, but it turned out to be a positive thing since once she had fallen asleep those headaches wouldn't have bothered for the rest of the night. Even though her being asleep had represented no obstacle to the children that despite the olders' advice, sneaked into the room where she was sleeping and peppered her flushed cheek with tiny and delicate goodnight kisses. Maria begun to stir rather soon under their touch and was fully awake by Martha's turn, her face embarrassed and a little scared as she whispered her I'm sorry, unaware that there was absolutely nothing to be sorry about for her mother. She had awakened in sheer delight at the spoiling of the children, finding it adorable that it was being them to kiss her goodnight and not the other way around for once. But at least this way, none of them would have fallen asleep longing for their long-denied goodnights.
Apparently, for how heavy as her exhaustion was, seeing the children had thrilled such endorphin in her that her sleep had become lighter and she'd been able to catch the steps of people entering their own bedrooms from time to time, including Georg's.
His were the last steps she heard as he tiptoed into the bedroom and closed the door behind himself. She heard him sliding the sleeves of the nightrobe off his arms and draping it at the feet of the bed before perching himself over the edge of the mattress and taking his shoes off. One after the other, placing them silently on the floor beneath him. At this point she expected to feel him crawl to her side and kiss her goodnight, but instead she felt nothing. Not a movement, nor a sound.
Her eyes fluttered open, vainly as it was pitch dark as required for her headaches, but as she slowly adapted to the dim light filtering through the curtains, her narrowed eyes convinced her that he was hunched over, an elbow on his knee and a hand beneath his chin. She stirred, forcing herself into a seated position first and into a leaning forward one later, noticing that her husband hadn't reacted to any of her movements, probably because too lost into whatever thoughts were troubling his mind.
- "Darling?" she kept her voice low but got no answer, "Georg?" she repeated.
No answer yet, which confirmed her assumptions.
She stretched out her hand to find his shoulder and he seemed to slightly flick at her touch.
- "I thought you were asleep!" he finally spoke, his voice clumsy as it was when he tried to hide something, "Are you feeling any better with your head?" he then asked, steadying his tone
- "That's not the matter" she rolled her eyes, "I want to know how you feel" she continued, pushing herself back against the bedrest as her muscles felt weak again
- "Me? The children are safe, you are recovering, we are together again … what could be better than this?" he laughed nervously.
Maria listened in silence to that laughter that, she could tell, was all but a happy one. It was bitter and somewhat angry, it felt as though he was trying to convince himself with those words.
- "How can you say that when you were brooding just now? You seem happy, Georg, but you are not. Talk to me, darling".
The room plunged into silence for a brief pause, enough seconds for Maria to realize something was really troubling him and for Georg that it was being no use to keep his feelings trapped inside him.
Before a first tear could overflow his eyes, his head was buried into her chest, his arms wrapping her from beneath as he crumbled into her.
- "Oh, darling …" her hands pulled him into her from his broad shoulders but soon rambled up to thread through his silky hair.
Tears flooded out, soaking her nightgown, but words did too, a bit muffled by his closeness to her.
- "I want to be happy, really. But I can't forget, Maria. I can't stop thinking of what you and the children have been through, what I put you through. I know you don't blame me but it's almost hard to believe we're actually safe"
- "It takes time for these thing-"
- "Not for me" he interrupted sharply
- "Why not? You're human as all of us and I love you for the way you feel things. This way, so deeply within yourself" her hand smoothed down along the small of his neck
- "Yes, but how do you get over their torment?" he asked, his palm opened hand dropping angrily onto the mattress
- "Georg …" she spoke his name softly, "there is not a right way to get over things. Remember that time back into the hospital that I screamed to you to go away? I said it because I couldn't forget the look on your face when they took me away or when you had to tell me about the baby. There hasn't been a day since then that they haven't flashed into my mind, I couldn't forgive myself for putting you under the pressure of being even stronger for me because I needed you so desperately"
- "But that wasn't your fault" he reasoned, his head shifting to the side as he nuzzled his cheek against her nightgown
- "And it's not yours either" she reassured him once more, "you knew I never meant that, you knew I wanted you to stay. And I'm going to be right here for you as well, as long as you need, whether you like it or not Georg Von Trapp" her voice was warm but became firmer, her eyes unblinking on him now that the nightlamp was turned on.
Their gazes were locked, his angry and helpless, hers loving and understanding. Two of her fingers tucked a black curl back behind his ear before descending down to cup his cheek with her palm and wipe a stray tear away with her thumb. His eyes were dry now and he hung to her words as if they were oxygen for his lungs.
- "I don't mean to be dismissive of your troubles darling, but we know better than anyone else how little it takes to take everything we care about away from us" she breathed before her gaze could lose focus on him, "while I was away, I thought of nothing but being reunited with you and the children, it was the only thing that kept me alive" she looked at him again, "and now we have it, let's try to make the best of it. I know it's hard but I'm not going anywhere, I cannot live without my other half".
As it had often happened, Maria's words spoke directly to his heart, healing his wounds with the understanding of her eyes, the warmth of her voice and the kindness of her heart – things that came as natural as breathing to her but that meant more than life itself for him.
With these thoughts soothing his tormented spirit, he allowed himself to fall back into her embrace, his forehead buried into her neck and her hands held him close and kept smoothing the hair at the nape of his head in gentle downwards brushes of her fingers.
- "Darling, darling, Georg. I should have been more careful, you were being so strong for me I didn't realize you were suffering just as much. You needed me to be strong for you too" she sighed with a hint of sadness in her voice, her eyes aimlessly focused on the wall in front of her as she planted a kiss on top of his head
- "You are, my love. My strength, my guardian angel, my lighthouse, the only star I'd follow whenever the ship of my soul would get lost. I love you more than words will ever say" his voice was low, never so loving, never so sincere
- "I love you more" she was compelled to disagree, her love for him deepening and overwhelming her
- "No, I love you more" Georg replied promptly.
Only then she realized she had brought up a quote they would linger on for hours on end whenever it was mentioned.
- "You are the earth beneath my feet Maria, the first breaths of fresh scented spring air, the sun bringing light into my life …" his words were a soft murmur before a deep kiss against the tender skin of the hollow of her neck, eliciting a shiver that ran down her spine
- "Captain, behave please" she reprimanded him, "this is supposed to be a serious conversation" she discovered her voice quivering as she spoke
- He lifted his head for a brief while to meet her gaze "I am being serious" he stated, before coming back to trail her jawline with kisses
- "Whispering sweet nothings to my ears while- ouch!" she gasped in surprise when his teeth gently grazed her earlobe, "... biting me is not serious. The wine has gone to your head a bit too much" she resumed in a giggle, her eyes closing in contentment
- "Perhaps ... too heady ..." he admitted between hums of appreciation as his lips kept leaving open mouth kisses along her swan neck
- "Make love to me, Captain" she pleaded, her voice barely above a whisper.
His lips stopped their assault at once, pursing in a line just to smile as his weight shifted to his biceps and he came to touch their foreheads together.
- "Darling, you need to rest, you're not well ye-" one of his brows raised as he put all his efforts in resisting her temptation but got interrupted
- "I need you" she corrected him, staring deeply into the blue of his eyes.
Unwilling to wait for an answer, she had closed the short distance between them by pressing her lips to his and as soon as her tongue brushed his lower lip, he discovered himself powerless at her touch and allowed her to kiss him eagerly, deepening the kiss with every passing second.
He responded just as eagerly, the lust in his eyes fuelling hers even if they were closed, his longing and desire for her guiding the touch of his hands roaming all over her body, covering every inch of her skin down to her hips and back up again to her upper back, discovering to his delight that there was no brasserie hindering him. With each touch, each caress, their desire for one another gres, igniting a fire that burned brighter with each passing moment.
As sweet hunger bordered on desperation, she didn't put up any resistance to his delicious lead when his tongue caressed hers, her hands only able to do a quick job of undoing the buttons of his shirt and sliding it off along his strong arms.
He pecked at her lips a couple more times as he helped her peel off his clothes but soon enough, he began his ascent along her heavenly figure, his salted lips in delightful contrast with the delicate scent of lilac of her soft skin, shivering and trembling beneath his fierce passion.
A delicate suck to the side of her neck, a kiss to the sweet hollow between her collarbones, long seconds of nuzzling against the soft skin on top of her chest, each gesture accompanied by his passionate groans and hums as he discovered her body all over again, as though he has forgotten the features of the goddess that he had admired times and times again during their honeymoon.
And while his lips travelled down, her hands could only ramble up, threading her fingers through his dump and silky curls, keeping him glued to her as soft moans escaped her lips over and over.
It was then that their gazes locked, exploring the universe that they mirrored, their heartbeats increased and came to match, their breaths became wheezy with anticipation until their bodies merged, becoming one in the bliss of flesh and spirit.
- "I love you, Maria" Georg whispered, his voice raw with emotion
- "I love you too, Captain" she lovingly tucked a strand of hair behind his ear
Maria's heart overflew with love. In that moment, there was only them and he- he was her lighthouse. Now and forever.
Author's Note: This morning I woke up to some lovely reviews on this story, a perfect gift for my brithday, so, despite an hectic day, here is the next chapter with our beloved couple finally reuniting with the children. I truly hope you enjoyed the reading, stay tuned for the next updates! Sending much love