A/N: Hello everyone, I am back with chapter four of this story. Here, the events of "Headhunters" are covered.
Disclaimer: I don't own Gravity Falls
Things began with the Mystery Shack where Mabel and Dipper were watching Duck-tective.
"So, the duck is a detective." said Mrs. Pines surprised.
"Duck-tective is amazing!" declared Mabel.
"I really liked the mystery aspect." added Dipper.
"Which is good considering the hoops network Standards and Practices made the creator jump through." said Pacifica.
"You like Duck-tective?!" asked Mabel, amazed.
"Hey, I have my own interest outside what my parents make me like." answered Pacifica.
"That duck is a genius." said Mabel amazed.
"It's easy to find clues when you're that close to the ground." shrugged Dipper.
"Are you saying you could outwit Duck-tective?" asked Mabel doubtfully.
"Mabel, I have very keen powers of observation." began Dipper, "For example, just by smelling your breath I can tell that you've been eating..."
Dipper sniffed.
"An entire tube of toothpaste." finished Dipper surprised.
"It was so sparkly." said Mabel, toothpaste around her mouth.
"Mabel, we've been over this before." groaned Mrs. Pines.
"I know. I won't do it again." promised Mabel.
Soos suddenly arrived excitedly.
"Hey dudes, you'll never guess what I found!" cried Soos.
"Buried treasure!" exclaimed Dipper.
"Buried...Hey I was going to say that." said Mabel, playfully shoving her brother.
Soos led the twins down a corridor.
"So, I was cleaning up, when I found this secret door hidden behind some wallpaper. It's like super crazy bonkers." explained Soos.
Soos opened the door revealing the figures.
"That was a storage space I built." noted Ford.
"And it still was." replied Stan.
"Woah, it's a secret wax museum." said Dipper.
Mabel was feeling wax Sherlock Holms.
"They're so lifelike." said Mabel.
Dipper and Mabel shuttered at this figure in particular.
"Except for this one." said Dipper.
Dipper was shining a light on what he thought was a figure.
"Hello." said Stan.
Dipper, Mabel, and Soos screamed in fear.
"It's just me, your Grunkle Stan!" declared Stan.
The three screamed louder and ran off.
"That's an appropriate response." snickered Gideon.
"Watch it!" snapped Stan.
"Grunkle Stan, how did you get there anyway?" asked Dipper.
"I made sure there were passages throughout the home in case of danger." answered Ford.
"Like tax collectors." added Stan.
"Behold the Gravity Falls Wax Museum. It was one of our most popular attractions...until I forgot about it." explained Stan.
"How did you forget about it?" asked Pacifica.
"I had...other things going on." answered Stan.
Stan showed off the figures in his collection.
"Some kind of, I don't know, goblin man." said Stan.
"That's Larry King of the Larry King Show." stated Ford.
"Yeah, and he hosted Larry King Live for like...ever." added Wendy.
"I missed so much." mused Ford.
"Is anyone else getting the creeps here?" asked Dipper, shuddering.
Even those who didn't know what was to come had to agree.
"And now for my personal favorite: Wax Abraham Lincoln." said Stan.
Unfortunately, the blinds were left open allowing him to melt.
"Wax John Wilkes Booth, I'm looking in your direction." stated Stan.
This got a round of laughs.
"Don't worry Grunkle Stan, I'll make you a new wax sculpture from all this old wax." said Mabel.
"You really think you can make one of these puppies?" asked Stan.
"Grunkle Stan, I am an arts and crafts master." answered Mabel.
"You sure are sweetie." said Mrs. Pines.
"Why do you think I always have this glue gun stuck to my arm?" asked Mabel.
"Don't ask." sighed Dipper.
"I like your gumption kid." said Stan.
"I don't know what that word means, but thank you." said Mabel.
"See, I'm a good uncle." stated Stan.
"Now you are." answered Mrs. Pines.
The scene cut to Mabel sitting before a massive block of wax as Dipper walked up drinking a soda.
"Dipper!" cried Mabel.
Dipper choked on his soda having been startled by his sister.
"What do you think of my idea? She's part fairy princess, part horse fairy princess." said Mabel.
"It's...different." said Wendy.
"I like it dude!" declared Soos.
"Maybe you should carve something from real life." proposed Dipper.
"Like a waffle with big arms!" declared Mabel, sketching the idea.
"So that's were those dudes came from." said Wendy.
"Or you know...something else. Like someone from your family." proposed Dipper.
"Kids, have you seen my pants?" asked Stan, posing on a briefcase.
"Why are you walking around without pants?" asked Mr. Pines unhappy.
"I lost them somehow." answered Stan bluntly.
"Oh muse, you work in mysterious ways." cooed Mabel.
"Why is your sister talking to the ceiling?" asked Stan.
A montage followed of Mabel making the figure. She, Dipper, and Soos admired it as Mabel covered it in glitter.
"I found my pants, but now I'm missing my..." began Stan.
Stan freaked out upon seeing the figure.
"Stanley, that figured reminded you of Stanford, didn't it?" asked Shermie.
"Maybe...kind of..." answered Stan meekly.
"What do you think?" asked Mabel.
"I think...the wax museum is back in business!" answered Stan excitedly.
The next day, the wax museum reopened. Soos directed traffic, using corndogs, while Dipper and Wendy manned the entrance.
"I can't believe this many people showed up." admitted Dipper.
"I know, right? Your uncle probably bribed them or something." agreed Wendy.
"He bribed me." revealed Dipper.
Wendy revealed Stan bribed her too and they both laughed.
"It was the only way you freeloaders would work!" declared Stan.
Stan then began the opening.
"Please ladies, control yourselves." said Stan.
Three dead-eyed women surrounded by flies were shown.
"Quite the lady killer." said Gideon sarcastically.
"I've had better luck than you." smirked Stan.
Stan then resumed his speech.
"But enough about me..." began Stan.
Stan grabbed the tarp covering the statue.
"Behold me!" declared Stan.
Stan yanked the tarp off revealing the wax figure Mabel created. Soos played fanfare on his keyboard and a few people politely clapped.
"Excellent as always dear." said Mrs. Pines.
"Michaelangelo couldn't have done better." said Gideon.
Stan then introduced Mabel.
"Thank you for coming. I made this sculpture with my own two hands! It's covered in my blood, sweat, tears, and other fluids!" said Mabel.
Everyone was grossed out by the last line.
"Mabel dear, that's something you keep to yourself." noted Mrs. Pines.
"Yeah." agreed Mabel embarrassed.
"I will now take questions! You there!"
"Old Man McGucket, local kook." said McGucket.
"I saw Blendin again running off!" cried Mabel.
"Remember, we did cause a bunch of anomalies he had to clean up." noted Dipper.
"Are the wax figures alive? Follow up question, can I survive the wax man uprising?" asked McGucket.
"Yes, and yes." answered Dipper.
Ford became slightly worried by this.
"Um...yes! Next question!" answered Mabel.
"Toby Determined, Gravity Falls Gossiper. Do you really think this counts as a wonder of the world?" asked Toby.
"Your microphone is a turkey baster Toby." noted Stan bluntly.
"It's weird to see how far Bodacious T has come." mused Wendy.
"Bodacious T?" asked Mr. Pines confused.
"You'll understand later." shrugged Wendy.
"Shandra Jimenez, a real reporter. Your flyers promised free pizza with admission to this event. Is this true?" asked Shandra.
The crowd became restless demanding their free pizza.
"That was a type. Goodnight, everyone!" answered Stan.
Stan used a smoke bomb to escape grabbing the cash register as he did so.
"You shouldn't lie to people like that." said Shermie.
"Hey, that would have been expensive!" declared Stan.
The unhappy crowd departed.
"In your face!" cried Manly Dan, punching a pole.
"Of course." groaned Wendy embarrassed.
Mabel still felt things went well. It cut to that night as Mabel shined wax Stan while the real Stan counted the money.
"Hot pumpkin pie! Look at all this cash! And I owe it all to one person: this guy!" exclaimed Stan, pointing to his wax figure.
Mabel playfully punched Stan.
"Yeah, you too, ya little gremlin!" laughed Stan, giving Mabel a playful noogie.
The twins' parents smiled at this.
"Now you kids wash up. We've got another day of fleecing rubes tomorrow." said Stan.
The smile the twins' parents had gone away.
Stan was watching Duck-tective with Wax Stan. Stan got up to go to the bathroom.
"Need anything?" asked Stan.
Wax Stan remained silent.
"I love this guy! Don't you go anywhere." said Stan.
An ominous view outside was taken before returning to the bathroom where the twins brushed their teeth.
"I'm glad you're still using that shirt." noted Mr. Pines.
"Hey Dipper, want to do a toothbrush race?" asked Mabel.
"Okay." answered Dipper.
"No! No! No!" cried Stan.
"Mr. Pines really didn't want them doing that toothbrush race." said Soos.
The twins ran downstairs.
"Wax Stan! He's been...murdered!" exclaimed Stan.
The now headless wax figure laid on the floor.
"Could it be..." thought Ford.
Gompers was shown outside eating in the glow of police lights. Inside, Sherrif Blubs and Deputy Durland had arrived to investigate the beheading.
"I got up to use the john, right? And when I came back...blammo! He's headless!" explained Stan.
"My expert handcrafting...besmirched. Besmirched!" cried Mabel.
Dipper comforted his sister.
"Who would do something like this?" asked Dipper.
All eyes fell onto Gideon.
"I swear it wasn't me!" exclaimed Gideon.
"It really wasn't him." confirmed Dipper.
"What's your opinion, Sherrif Blubs?" asked Durland.
"Look, we'd love to help you folks, but let's face the facts...this case is unsolvable." said Blubs.
"What?!" asked Dipper, Mabel, and Stan in unison.
"He's kidding right?" asked Mr. Pines.
"You take that back, Sherrif Blubs!" demanded Stan.
"You're kidding right? There must be evidence, motives. You know, I could help if you want." offered Dipper.
"Our little Sherlock Holms." said Mrs. Pines amused.
Dipper shuttered.
"Please don't say that." grumbled Dipper.
"He's really good. He figured out who was eating out tin cans!" stated Mabel.
"All signs pointed to the goat." noted Dipper.
"It was Gompers." confirmed Mabel.
"Yeah, yeah. Let the boy help. He's got a little brain up in his head." agreed Stan.
Dipper gave Stan a grateful smile.
"Don't get all mushy on me." said Stan.
"Would you look at what we got here? City boy thinks he's going to solve a mystery with his fancy computer phone!" taunted Blubs.
"City boy! City boy!" cried Durland.
"You are adorable!" declared Blubs.
"Adorable?" asked Dipper shaken.
"How dare they!" exclaimed Mrs. Pines outraged.
"Blubs and Durland aren't bad guys once you get to now them." shrugged Stan.
"Look P.J.'s why don't you leave the investigating to the grown-ups?" asked Blubs.
The two officers got a message over the radio about someone putting an entire cantaloupe in their mouth so they gleefully left.
"I see the sheriffs didn't change in thirty years." muttered Ford.
"That's it! Mabel, you and me are going to find the jerk who did this and get back that head! Then we'll see who's adorable." declared Dipper.
Dipper let out a sneeze.
"Aw, you sneeze like a kitten." cooed Mabel.
"I think it's cute." mused Pacifica.
The blonde girl immediately realized what she said.
"For a dork." added Pacifica.
"Wax Stan has lost his head and it's up to us to find it." stated Dipper.
Mabel took picture of the crime scene as a collage of suspect photos was shown.
"Why is my picture there?" asked Robbie.
"This is before they knew you were always a jerk." answered Wendy.
"And why is Fiddleford included?" asked Ford.
"He did great a giant robot dinosaur." answered Mabel.
"There were a lot of unhappy customers at that unveiling. The murder could have been anyone." noted Dipper.
"Yeah! Even us!" declared Mabel.
"In Gravity Falls that could be a real possibility." shrugged Ford.
"Could have been Anti-Mabel." said Mabel.
"In this town, anything is possible. Ghosts, zombies, it could be months before we find our first clue." said Dipper.
"Unfortunately, the wait can be agonizing." began Ford, "However, once you find that first clue.
"Hey look. A clue." said Mabel.
"Never mind." said Ford.
"Footprints in the shag carpet." noted Dipper.
"They's weird, they've got a hole in them." said Mabel.
Ford felt pretty confident he knew who the culprit was.
"And they're leading to..." began Dipper.
They followed the footprints behind the chair where they found an ax.
"That confirms it." thought Ford.
It cut to Soos inspecting the ax.
'So, what do you think?" asked Dipper.
"In my opinion: this is an ax." answered Soos.
"Wait a minute...the lumberjack!" cried Mabel.
A flashback was shown of Manly Dan punching the pole.
"He was furious when he didn't get that pizza." said Dipper.
"Furious enough for murder!" exclaimed Mabel.
"Wendy, sorry we thought your dad was the culprit." said Dipper.
"Hey, I would have thought the same." shrugged Wendy.
"Oh, you mean Manly Dan. Yeah, he hangs out at this crazy intense biker joint downtown." said Soos.
"Then that's where we're going." said Mabel intensly.
"No way! I draw the line here!" declared Mrs. Pines.
"It already happened." said Dipper.
Mr. Pines turned to Stan.
"And you let them go?" asked Mr. Pines unhappy.
Stan laughed nervously.
"Dude, this is awesome. You two are like, the Mystery Twins." said Soos.
"Don't call us that." replied Dipper.
"Mystery Twins! Mystery Twins! Mystery Twins!" chanted Mabel.
"What can I say, it grew on me." admitted Dipper.
The two went outside where Stan was removing a coffin from the trunk of his car.
"I'm doing a memorial service for Wax Stan." revealed Stan.
"At least it's not one of the many illegal things you could be doing." sighed Ford.
"Hey, I don't have to always break the law." stated Stan.
"Did you get that from Robbie's parents?" asked Wendy.
"I stole it when they weren't around." answered Stan nonchalantly.
"Something small but classy." added Stan.
Shermie gave Stan a suspicious look.
"Sorry Grunkle Stan, but we've got a big break in the case." said Dipper.
"Break in the case!" declared Mabel.
"We're heading into town right now to interrogate the murderer." said Dipper.
"We've got an ax." added Mabel.
Mabel pulled out the ax and imitated the famous Psycho score.
"That seems like something a responsible parent wouldn't want you doing." mused Stan.
"Exactly." agreed Mrs. Pines.
"Good thing I'm an uncle. Avenge me kids! Avenge me!" cried Stan.
"Remember, I knew they were able to handle themselves." stated Stan.
The two arrived at the Skull Fracture spotting Tats guarding the door. Mabel handed Dipper the fake IDs she made and they were ready to try and get in.
"Sorry, but we don't serve miners." said Tats.
A miner cried out and spat on the ground before leaving.
"Okay, that was good." admitted Mr. Pines.
The twins walked up and Mabel presented the obviously fake ID cards.
"Honey, I don't think that will work." said Mrs. Pines relieved.
"Works for me." said Tats, letting them in.
"Are you kidding me?!" asked Mrs. Pines stunned.
The two entered the bar which clearly was not the best location for children. Mabel walked over someone lying on the floor.
"He's resting." stated Mabel.
"He could be dead." noted Robbie.
Mrs. Pines got anxious at this.
"His chest was moving. He was totally alive." said Mabel.
Mrs. Pines felt a bit better at this.
"Alright, let's try to blend in, okay?" asked Dipper.
Mabel agreed then immediately began getting friendly with a biker.
"Not what I mean." groaned Dipper.
"Oh, come on, everyone needs a friend Dipper." replied Mabel.
"Honey, there's a time and place." said Mr. Pines.
Manly Dan was playing with an arm-wrestling game when Dipper approached him.
"Where were you last night?" asked Dipper.
"Punching the clock." answered Manly Dan.
"You were at work." said Dipper.
"No, I was punching that clock!" declared Dan.
Manly Dan pointed to a clock outside which he had damaged.
"Of course." groaned Wendy embarrassed.
Dipper noted the time on the clock was the time of the murder. He then pulled out the ax.
"So, I guess you've never seen this before?" asked Dipper.
Manly Dan called Dipper a girl then cut Dipper off before he could correct him.
"Great, I'm probably going to have rewatch the whole Manotaurs fiasco." muttered Dipper.
"I wouldn't pick my teeth with that ax. It's left-handed. I only used my right hand! The manly hand!" declared Dan.
Manly Dan ripped the off of the machine and began pummeling the machine with it.
"Get 'em! Get 'em!" cried Tyler excitedly.
Wendy covered her eyes with her hands.
Mabel and the biker were still at the bar as Mabel used her cootie catcher.
"Your wife is going to be beautiful." gasped Mabel.
"Yes!" declared the biker, pumping his arm.
Dipper came and pulled Mabel away.
"But will she love me?!" asked the biker.
"Yes." answered Mabel.
"I'm impressed Mabel." noted Mr. Pines.
"Like Mabel said, everyone needs a friend." said Pacifica.
The twins were walking down the street.
"It's a left-handed ax." noted Dipper.
Dipper showed a list of suspects.
"These are all our suspects. Manly Dan is right-handed, that means all we have to do is find our left-handed suspect and we've found our killer." explained Dipper.
"Oh man, we are on fire today!" exclaimed Mabel.
"Let's find that murderer." said Dipper.
The twins fist bumped. A montage followed but, ever suspect proved to be right-handed. Except for Mikey R. who had both hands in casts.
"Mabel, there's only one person left on this list." said Dipper.
"Of course, it all adds up!" declared Mabel.
The scene cut to the Gravity Falls Gossiper at night.
"No offense kids, but Toby couldn't hack his way out of a paper bag." said Stan.
Dipper and Mabel had brought the police with them. Blubs warned Dipper he'd better be right and both twins were convinced.
'I'm going to get use my nightstick." said Durland excitedly.
"He seems a bit too excited." noted Mr. Pines concerned.
The police kicked in the door with Blubs announcing this was a raid.
"What is this, some kind of raid?" asked Toby.
Durland smashed a lap with his nightstick.
"Yeah, Gravity Falls really need better cops." said Stan.
"Toby Determined, you're under arrest for the murder of the wax body of Grunkle Stan." said Dipper.
"You have the right to remain impressed with our awesome detective work." added the Mabel.
The twins high-fived.
"It's so cute to see you playing together." said Mrs. Pines.
"Mom, this was a serious investigation.' replied Dipper embarrassed.
"Galloping goose feathers, I don't understand!" cried Toby.
Dipper explained what believed what the motivation. Toby wanted the unveiling to be a big story to save his paper and, when it wasn't, beheaded Wax Stan to create his own headline.
"Toby Determined, your yesterday's news." said Mabel.
"Impressive kids." said Ford.
"Boy, your little knees must be sore...from jumping to conclusions." said Toby.
Toby did a dance and declared he had nothing to do with the murder much to the surprise of the twins.
"Then where were you the night of the break-in?" asked Blubs.
Toby showed everyone film of him making out with a cardboard cutout of Shandra Jimenez to their disgust.
"Just when you can't think Toby couldn't more of a werido." said Stan.
"Timestamp confirms it. Toby, you're off the hook. You freak of nature." said Blubs.
"Hooray!" cried Toby.
"But it has to be him. Check the ax for fingerprints." said Dipper.
The police just that and found no fingerprints.
"Of course, you always were gloves to cover your prints. That's basic stuff." shrugged Stan.
Blubs, Durland, and even Toby made fun of an embarrassed Dipper and Mabel.
"Boy, I'd be pretty embarrassed if I was you two." said Toby, as the video making out with the cutout still played.
"Sixer, next time we go to Gravity Falls, remind me to pay Toby a visit." whispered Stan annoyed.
The scene cut to the funeral of wax Stan. Stan thanked everyone including the other wax figures.
"Some people might say it's wrong for a man to love a wax replica of himself." began Stan.
"They're wrong!' declared Soos.
"Wax Stan, I hope you're picking pockets in wax Heaven." said Stan.
Stan suddenly became emotional.
"I'm sorry. I got glitter in my eye!" cried Stan, running off.
"You're taking this really seriously." noted Pacifica surprised.
"That's because this isn't a funeral for Wax Stan." revealed Shermie.
"Then who's it a funeral for?" asked Gideon.
"Me." answered Ford.
Stan averted his gaze.
"We're right, aren't we?" asked Ford.
"I know you were alive. You're too much of a nerd not to survive. But it felt like a death and you vanished after our fight. I felt like I didn't get to say goodbye." explained Stan embarrassed.
"What's important is you're both here now." said Shermie.
Stan was still clearly embarrassed.
"Stan, it's okay to grieve when you lose someone you love. That's something I learned firsthand." said Wendy somberly.
Soos got up and ran after Stan.
"Oh dude!" cried Soos.
Ford noticed something about the Wax Lizzie Borden statue that confirmed his suspicions, but he wasn't the only one.
"The figure of Lizzie Borden is missing her ax." said Shermie.
"Wait...you don't mean..." began Mr. Pines.
Dipper sighed, feeling defeated but, Mabel tried reassuring him. Dipper noticed a hole in the foot of Wax Stan and realized the truth.
"Mabel, the murders are..." began Dipper.
"Right behind you." concluded Wax Sherlock Holms.
The wax figures came to life and Wax Lizzie Borden took her axe back from Mabel.
"The old man was right?!" asked Gideon surprised.
"I knew there was a wax figure uprising a-comin'!" declared McGucket.
"Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh!" said Mabel, worried.
"Congratulations, my young sleuths. You've unburied the truth, and now we're going to bury you." said Wax Sherlock Holms.
"No. No. No." said Mrs. Pines worried.
"We're okay mom." noted Mabel.
"It's only natural for me to worry when you two are in danger." replied Mrs. Pines.
Wax Sherlock Holms congratulated Dipper and had the other wax figure applause sarcastically.
"Nice and condescending." said Wax Sherlock Holms pleased.
Dipper asks how this is possible and Mabel asks if they're magic. The wax figures laugh and Wax Sherlock Holms reveals they're cursed coming to life when the moon is waxing.
"Fascinating." said Ford amazed.
"Your uncle bought us years ago at a garage sale." began Wax Sherlock Holms.
"A haunted garage sale yo!" declared Wax Coolio.
The seller warned Stan about the terrible price of the figures, but Stan thought he meant the twenty-dollar price tag and decided to steal them.
"What?" asked the seller.
"I said I was going to rob you." answered Stan.
"At least he's honest about being a thief." groaned Ford.
Wax Sherlock Holms continued explaining how they were tourist attractions who ran free during the night. Until Stan closed the museum and covered the door.
"I'm still surprised people would spend money on wax figures." said Pacifica.
"Especially since Stan is no Madame Tussaud." added Gideon.
Stan grumbled annoyed.
"Grunkle Stan, why did you seal off the door?" asked Mabel.
"I could tell something screwy was going on. Food disappearing, stuff getting move around. At first, I thought it was Soos, but I checked the security cameras and confirmed it was the figures." explained Stan.
"If you knew, they why were you in that room?" asked Dipper.
"I got nostalgic for those guys. I didn't know they wanted me dead." answered Stan.
"We've been waiting ten years to get our revenge on stan. But we got the wrong guy." concluded Wax Sherlock Holms.
With that, the flashback ended.
"So, you were trying to murder Grunkle Stan for real?!" asked Dipper horrified.
"You were right Dipper; wax people are creepy!" declared Mabel.
Most watching agreed with this sentiment.
"Now that you know our secret, you must die." said Wax Sherlock Holms.
The wax figures backed the twins against a table set up for the funeral. The twins ineffectively threw items at the wax figures. Dipper threw hot coffee onto Wax Genghis Khan whose face melted.
"Your ability to improvise in tight situations is most admirable." said Ford.
The twins grabbed electric candles off the tables and the wax figures backed away.
"Anyone moves and we'll melt you into candles!" declared Dipper.
"Decorative candles!" added Mabel.
Wax Sherlock Holms asked if the twins really thought they could beat them. Dipper and Mabel answered admittedly not fully confidently.
"So be it...attack!" ordered Wax Sherlock Holms.
Dipper and Mabel noticed their parents getting more nervous.
Wax Robin Hood went for Mabel, but she dodged him. Wax Lizzie Borden then accidentally beheaded Wax Robin Hood with her ax. Wax Shakespear attacked Mabel so she cut his arms off with a candle. One arm tried to strangle Mabel so she slammed its fingers into a door.
"Interview this, Larry King!" cried Dipper.
Dipper used his candle to behead Wax Larry King.
"My neck! My beautiful neck!" cried Wax Larry King.
Wax Grouch Marx tried attacking Dipper, but Dipper bifurcated him with the candle.
"Jokes on you Groucho!" declared Dipper.
"I've heard about a cutting remark, but this is ridiculous." said Wax Groucho.
Mr. Pines couldn't help but snigger at this.
"Hey, why is there nothing in my hand?" asked Wax Groucho.
"Yeah, where was his cigar?" asked Mr. Pines.
"Beats me. It's almost like it's been censored or something." answered Stan.
Wax Genghis Khan attacked Dipper, but Dipper dodged him. Wax Genghis Khan fell into the fireplace meeting his end.
"Ha, Genghis Khan! You fell harder than the...uh...I don't know, uh, Jin Dynasty." said Dipper.
"Very good Dipper. China had two Jin dynasties and the second one was overthrown by the third son of Genghis Khan." said Ford.
"Nice. I guess I did learn something in history class." mused Dipper.
Mabel was swinging Wax Coolio's head to knock down other wax figures.
"Dipper, watch out!" cried Mabel.
Dipper cut one of the legs off Wax Richard Nixon then turned to see Wax Sherlock Holms approaching him.
"Alright, let's get this taken care of." said Wax Sherlock Holms.
Wax Sherlock Holms stuck Wax Stan's head on the room of a rhinoceros hanging on the wall the grabbed a sword hanging nearby. He knocked the electirc candle out of Dipper's hands.
"He is way too casual about trying to kill Dipper." said Wendy concerned.
Mrs. Pines notable tensed up at the 'kill Dipper' part. As did Pacifica.
"Catch!" cried Mabel.
Mabel threw a hot fire poker to Dipper and a sword fight ensued. They reached the attic where Wax Sherlock Homs cornered Dipper.
"Once your family is out of the way, we'll rule the night once again!" declared Wax Sherlock Holms.
Dipper looked out the window. Dipper rolled through the legs of Wax Sherlock Holms and escaped.
"Don't count on it!" declared Dipper.
"Impressive thinking." said Ford.
Dipper climbed onto the roof with Wax Sherlock Holms in pursuit. The sword fight continued on the Mystery Shack sign with the 'S' being knocked off by Wax Sherlock Holms.
"That was you?!" asked Stan.
"Technically, Sherlock Holms." noted Dipper nervously.
"It's fine. What's important is you're okay." replied Stan.
"You really think you can outwit me boy? I'm Sherlock Bleeding Holms!" declared the Wax Figure.
Dipper climbed up the sign and went behind the chimney stopping at Wendy's hideout spot. Dipper looked around but, didn't see the wax figure. Wax Sherlock Holms kicked up and raised his sword.
"Any last words?" asked Wax Sherlock Holms.
"Got any sunscreen?" asked Dipper.
Wax Sherlock Holms noticed his hands were melting. He turned and saw the morning sun rising.
"Nice dude!" declared Dipper.
"Dipper is a nerd so I'm not surprise." said Pacifica, secretly relieved.
"But if the sun is rising now then how early did you have that funeral?" asked Robbie.
"I didn't want it cutting into fleecing rubes." answered Stan.
"You know, letting me lead you outside...probably not your sharpest decision." noted Dipper.
"Outsmarted by a child in short pants! No!" cried Wax Sherlock Holms.
Wax Sherlock holms cursed his situation as he melted to nothing.
"See, I told you those kids could take care of themselves." said Stan.
"Case close!" declared Dipper.
Dipper clapped his hands together and some dust caused him to sneeze.
"You sneeze like a kitten! Those policemen where right, you are adorable! Adorable!" cried Wax Sherlock Holms in his last words.
"Jerk." grumbled Dipper.
Inside, Mabel had finished off the rest of the wax figures.
"Amazing, you melted them all by yourself." said Ford.
"Yeah, Mabel's a tough cookie like her Gruncle Stan!" declared Stan proudly.
Mabel asked the head of Wax Shakespear if he knew any limericks so he tried coming up with one.
"Nope!" declared Mabel.
Mabel tossed the head of Shakespeare into the fire.
"That's kind of cold blooded." said Wendy.
"Dude was wax, but he was still alive." added Soos.
Mabel flashed back to giving the Bill controlled Blendin the time rift.
"Not the worst thing I've done." thought Mabel flatly.
Mabel happily congratulated Dipper when he returned unharmed. Dipper removed the head of Wax Stan from the rhino's horn.
"I couldn't have done it without my sidekick." said Dipper.
"No offense Dipper, but you're the sidekick." replied Mable.
"What? Says who? Have people been saying that? Have you heard that?" asked Dipper concerned.
"I was just teasing you broseph." said Mabel.
"We're a team." said Dipper.
"Mystery Twins!" exclaimed Mabel.
Stan returned and saw the aftermath of the battle.
"Hot Belgian waffles!" exclaimed Stan.
"That was the restaurant next to us growing up." noted Ford.
"I have good feeling about Glass Shard Beach. It's Filbrick and Caryn that I can't stand." noted Stan.
Stan asked what happened and Mabel told him what happened.
"I decapitated Larry King." added Dipper.
"There's something you don't hear everyday." said Wendy.
"You kids and your imaginations!" laughed Stan
"I thought you said you knew they were real?" asked Gideon.
"I didn't want them getting mixed up in all the supernatural junk in Gravity Falls." answered Stan.
"On the bright side, look what we found." said Dipper.
Dipper tossed Stan his wax head.
"My head! I missed this guy! I missed this guy!" declared Stan happily.
Stan gave the twins an affectionate noogie when Blubs and Durland pulled up outside.
"Solve the case yet, boy?" asked Blubs.
Blubs added he was so confident the answer would be no he took a long, slow sip of coffee.
"Actually, the answer is yes." answered Dipper.
Blubs spat his hot coffee out into the face of Durland who then did the same. They then raced off much to the delight of the Pines.
"He got scalded!" laughed Stan.
"Can't say I feel bad after they mocked my son earlier." noted Mrs. Pines.
A crash was heard off screen. Dipper asked if all the wax figures were truly gone and Mabel answered she was pretty sure they were. However, it was revealed Wax Larry King's head was alive in the vent. Suddenly a rat showed up.
"So, you're a rat. Tell me about that." requested Wax Larry King's head.
The rat bit his ear off and scurried away with Wax Larry King's head in pursuit.
"So...that happened." said Mr. Pines befuddled.
"Is there any chance Wax Larry King's head would let me study him?" asked Ford.
"I think so." answered Mabel.
"He seems reasonable enough." added Dipper.
"I still don't like my children being a life-or-death situation." said Mrs. Pines unhappy.
"Hey, you can't protect them forever." said Stan.
"Twelve-year-old children shouldn't be in a situation where being killed is a possibility." replied Mrs. Pines angrily.
"Sometimes you can't control what happens. Things are looking good one minute, then you're on out the street the next." muttered Stan flatly.
"You can also learn from the past." noted Shermie.
"Grunkle Stan was a great caretaker!" declared Mabel defensively.
"Yeah, Mr. Pines loves the little dudes!" declared Soos.
"I suggest we continue." proposed Wendy.
"Agreed." said Axolotl.
A/N: So that's where we'll end things for now. I figured Ford would have been smart enough to figure out the wax figures where the killer(s) since he did build an interdimensional portal. There's no way Mabel's "He's resting" line wasn't added by Disney. Speaking of, it's impressive they got away with saying "murder" in this episode. Next time, the events of "Hand That Rocks the Mabel" are covered. Please review.
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