It's always such a familiar feeling
One you never truly forget
It hides in the unexpected
And jumps out when's it's unwanted
I'm aware of my thoughts
But it's like I ignore them
Every "Why?" And every "How?"
"How could they?"
"Why am I like this?"
Or maybe I just ask them so often
That I've thought of every possible answer
Maybe some part of my brain tries to quiet those thoughts
And it works, but never forever
Eventually those thoughts become every thought
An overwhelming force
That feels like you may never escape it
Then it's gone, just as quick as it came
It's just a matter of living with it
The disappointment to yourself, and others
I've grown comfort in my sadness
I know it will always be there
Hiding in the deepest depths
Prepared to ruin my happiness in seconds