The morning was peaceful and the two detectives were enjoying their day off as summer slowly gave way to autumn. Finally able to sleep in for more than a few minutes at a time Hank stayed in bed with his blue eyes shut until he was suddenly awoken by the sound of something glass shattering on the hardwood of the livingroom floor. The shattering sound was followed shortly by Connor telling Sumo to lay down. Grabbing his alarm clock sitting on the nightstand beside his bed Hank noted the time on the digital display at 9:34 in the morning. They both had the day off, they didn't have a schedule to keep, and Connor was always very quiet in the morning.

Something unusual was happening in the livingroom and was something Hank was almost afraid to check out.

"Damn it, Connor."

Hank rolled off his bed tiredly and wiped his hand down his sleepy face as he rose from the bed to check out the commotion.

"You better not be trying to rearrange the livingroom or some other weird shit."

As Hank walked down the hallway toward the livingroom he caught the sight of a small black furred puppy running out of the livingroom and into the kitchen at an excited pace. He paused for a moment as if he needed to stop and think about what he had just seen, but deep down he knew he wasn't mistaken.

"Connor?" Hank called out in a suspicious tone as he reached the end of the hallway and peered at the deviant kneeling on the ground in the corner of the livingroom with a small broom and dustpan in his hands. "Why did I just see a small dog running through the house?"

Sumo went casually trotting into the kitchen after the puppy in question while Connor was on his hands and knees picking up the pieces of the broken lamp on the livingroom floor. The deviant's L.E.D. was cycling a nervous red as he looked up at Hank somewhat anxiously and was too hesitant to respond right away.

"Connor." Repeating the question with more force behind his words Hank demanded an answer. "Why is there a puppy in the house?"

"It's not my puppy." Connor finally answered as he stood up with the glass shards of the broken lamp in his left palm. "I swear that I'm telling you the truth."

"Well that puppy sure as hell isn't mine, and Sumo is a boy so I know he didn't have a secret litter behind our backs." The twinge of sarcasm helped lower the tension in the air. "So, whose puppy is it?"

"Quincy belongs to the neighbors, Mr. and Mrs. Brilstein."

"'Quincy', huh..." Hank scoffed at the response and ran his hand over his bearded chin in irritation. "So, why is Quincy here?"

"I had gone outside to get the mail and Mrs. Brilstein asked if we could watch him while she was out of the house for the day. Her husband fell down the stairs and had broken his arm this morning, and she had nowhere else to place Quincy on such short notice." Motioning toward the center of the livingroom Connor tried to prove his story to ease Hank's mind. "The mail is on the coffee table, nothing important arrived."

"And you agreed to take in the puppy, huh?" In a paternally induced scolding manner Hank crossed his arms in a somewhat impatient manner as he easily saw through Connor's attempt to deflect the questions regarding the puppy. "Are you going to be a volunteer for all the neighbors?"

"I didn't exactly volunteer..." Connor trailed off guiltily and his red L.E.D. flashed to yellow with a little guilt for not asking for Hank's permission. "I... Well..."

"You didn't exactly say 'no' either, did you?"

"I'm sorry, Hank. I should've asked for your permission first."

"Yeah, that's right."

Shrinking down a little Connor gave Hank a timid glance before he spoke up again. "...Are you mad?"

"Annoyed. Not mad." Hank looked at the bits of broken lamp in Connor's hands and then looked about the livingroom. It seemed the only casualty that day was the cheap old lamp Hank had picked up at a garage sale years ago. "Is that all he broke?"

"Yes. I believe Quincy is unfamiliar with bare wood floors." Making sure he didn't miss any glass Connor prepared to dispose of the shattered remains of the lamp. "He slipped and crashed into the side of the table when I let him inside the house."

Hank craned his neck to look inside the kitchen as the black lab puppy was helping itself to Sumo's food bowl. Sumo himself was laying on the floor behind Quincy just watching with absolute indifference as the puppy greedily ate up most of his food.

"Hank," speaking up in a soft voice Connor tried to make amends for his error in judgment. "if I need to find somewhere else for Quincy to stay then I will make the arrangements."

"Here's the deal." Hank held up his hand as he turned to look back at the deviant still holding the shards of the broken lamp and the dust pan in his hands. "He can stay for today, ONLY if you feed him, if you clean up after him, if you keep him from destroying anything else in the house and you let him in and out just like you would do for Sumo."

"Of course." Connor's yellow L.E.D. cycled back to blue with relief and his soulful brown eyes lit up. "I'm sure he'll learn how to properly walk on bare floors in time."

"I'm not talking about him bumping into furniture. I'm talking about him having accidents on the floor or chewing on anything that he can get his little mouth on."

"Like a chew toy?"

"Not exactly. The purpose of a chew toy is to prevent a puppy or dog from chewing on things like shoes, pillows, furniture, small electronics or a cactus."

That last one made Connor's brow arch with righteous intrigue. "...Dogs will chew on cacti?"

"Maybe that was just Sumo..." Hank muttered under his breath as he realized the ludicrousness of his comment. "Look, I'm going to go take a quick shower and then I'm going to get new tires for the car. I better come back home and find everything still in one piece."

"I'll handle it." Connor promised as Hank disappeared into the bathroom to freshen up for the morning. "No more problems."

Feeling less anxious Connor carried the broken lamp and the dustpan into the kitchen to throw into the garbage can and dispose of the shards. As he passed through the kitchen Connor noticed that Quincy was making a huge mess on the floor as he spilled half of the food in Sumo's bowl onto the floor around him as he inhaled the other half of the food.

"Perhaps you should try eating from a smaller bowl, Quincy."

The puppy continued to make a mess as he ate, paying no mind to anything being said to him and having no concerns for anything else in the world.

"Sumo isn't this messy."

Connor observed as he dusted off his hands and grabbed the long floor broom from the neighboring laundry room to sweep up the spilled food from the floor. Sweeping the bits of food into a small pile on the floor Connor finished cleaning up the dropped kibble in time for Quincy to knock over Sumo's water bowl creating a puddle on the floor at Connor's feet. The puppy curiously checked out the rest of the kitchen without even noticing his messes.

"I don't think even Hank is this messy..."

"I heard that." Hank commented as he walked out of the bathroom dressed in a change of fresh clothes. Spinning the car keys around his fingertip by the circular keyring he walked toward the front door and called out to Connor over his shoulder. "Remember what I said. I won't be too long."

"I'll remember!"

Connor watched as Hank walked through the front door while he dropped a kitchen towel down over the spilled water on the floor to mop it up.

"Sumo, perhaps you could give Quincy some lessons in manners before the day is over."

The massive Saint Bernard just stood up from where he was laying on the floor and trotted into the livingroom to flop down on the couch to take an early morning nap.

"Or not."

With the kitchen floor now clean Connor draped the damp towel over the edge of the sink and turned around to focus on Quincy to keep him from making any further messes. However, the small puppy wasn't in the kitchen.

"Quincy?"

Connor's L.E.D. flashed from blue to yellow with worry. Walking out of the kitchen Connor looked around the livingroom but still didn't see the little black puppy anywhere.

"Quincy, come!"

A 'thud' from Connor's bedroom drew his attention quickly and he honed in on the missing puppy. Walking into his bedroom he found his guitar case knocked over from its position in the corner with Quincy trying to find a way to eat the leather siding. The puppy's teeth were too small to do any real damage, but the urge to break the puppy of any bad chewing habits was an absolute must.

"No!"

Connor instinctively scolded as he picked up the puppy from the floor, pried the case from Quincy's teeth before standing up, and then carried the puppy out of his room and pulled the bedroom door shut behind him.

"You cannot chew anything that is not a chew toy."

Holding the puppy out in front of himself length Connor looked Quincy in the face as if the puppy could actually comprehend English perfectly well like a human or android could.

"Do you understand?"

The puppy responded by licking Connor's nose and proceeded to squirm about in an attempt to get out of Connor's hands. Not wanting to drop the puppy or hurt him with a tighter grip Connor gently put Quincy down on the livingroom floor to run about again. The puppy happily walked about the livingroom sniffing at all of the furniture, the walls and the front door with a genuine intrigue.

"Quincy must be acclimating to the new-"

Before Connor had the chance to react Quincy lifted his leg and quickly piddled on the front door as he had his next accident.

"...Quincy still needs a lot of training."

Connor's L.E.D. remained yellow as he returned to the kitchen to gather cleaning supplies from under the sink to mop up the puppy's urine and clean the floor before it had the chance to soak into the floorboards or stink up the livingroom.

"I should've expected this."

Sumo propped his head up on the arm rest of the couch as if he was enjoying watching Connor cleaning up mess after mess after mess. While the deviant was kneeling down in front of the door with the sponge, paper towel and cleaners in his hands the puppy circled around him and began trying to nip at the black fabric of Connor's t-shirt to engage in a game.

"No, Quincy. Play with a toy."

Remaining patient Connor lightly pushed the puppy away from his clothing, but the oblivious puppy relentlessly nipped at Connor's shirt. Using one hand to hold the puppy back and the other hand to finish cleaning up the mess, Connor now realized what Hank had meant when he described something as difficult as 'puppy-training Sumo'.

"You are full of excess energy."

Keeping Quincy in his left arm Connor carried the cleaning supplies back into the kitchen with his other hand and then threw away the dirty paper towel in the garbage. Putting Quincy down on the floor by his leg Connor turned on the tap in the sink to wash off his hands in the water only to hear a strange 'thump' sound from behind him. Turning to look over his shoulder Connor saw that Quincy had found the kitchen pantry and managed to knock a full bag of flour down onto the floor and all over himself.

"Oh no... Not again."

Connor turned off the tap and wiped his hands off on his shirt as he watched the small (no longer solid black) puppy shaking off a cloud of flour into the air. Soon Quincy trotted away and left behind a trail of white paw prints over the linoleum floor marking where he had been. Moving quickly Connor grabbed Quincy before he could leave another mess in the livingroom or down the hallway, and held him in his arms. As flour smeared over his black t-shirt Connor carried Quincy into the bathroom and closed the door on the puppy to keep him contained.

"I better clean up the floor before Sumo gets into it, too."

Staying on top of the messes Connor sighed as he found himself yet again using the broom to sweep up the powdery mess in the kitchen. Half of the flour managed to remain inside the bag, but the other half was either on the floor or in Quincy's fur. With the kitchen cleaned up, yet again, Connor returned to the bathroom and opened the door, only to find that Quincy had pulled down the towels from the rack, knocked over the small trashcan and was now drinking out of the toilet.

"Quincy, no!"

Connor practically snatched the puppy out of the toilet before placing him down in the bathtub to be cleaned up properly.

"How did you destroy the bathroom in only four minutes and thirteen seconds?"

The bathtub was too deep for Quincy to escape from which gave Connor the perfect opportunity to clean up the bathroom quickly before he set about washing the flour from Quincy's black fur. It didn't take too long to re-fold the towels or pick up the trashcan, but getting Quincy to hold still long enough to rinse off the flour and put enough shampoo in the energetic puppy's fur was another kind endeavor.

"I'm sorry about this." The deviant apologized to the whimpering puppy under his care. "But this is necessary."

After enduring Quincy's pathetic whimpers from being bathed Connor wrapped the puppy up in a bath towel and proceeded to dry him off as best as he could before using another towel to hold the puppy close to his chest as he returned to the livingroom. Unwilling to risk another mess Connor just held the puppy in his arms as he sat on the couch next to Sumo and waited for the frustrated puppy to tire himself out enough to finally take a nap.

"Just hold still for a moment." Connor pleaded as he rubbed the tired puppy's ears gently. "That's all I ask."

The front door opened very slowly and Hank walked back inside the house warily. He looked around as if expecting to see some kind of mess, but instead he saw Connor sitting on the couch with Quincy wrapped up in a towel. Casually tossing his car keys onto the bookshelf against the wall Hank sat down in the recliner and just stared silently at Connor for a few minutes.

"Did you succeed in getting new tires for the car?" The deviant asked before Hank had the chance to say anything else. "You were gone for only..." Checking his internal clock Connor realized that he had spent over two hours taking care of Quincy and the puppy's messes. "...Two hours, twenty-six minutes and nineteen seconds."

"Yup." Hank confirmed with a smirk on his face as he studied Connor's demeanor and the puppy sleeping in a bath towel in Connor's arms. "Car's fine. So, how'd it go with the pup? You look exhausted."

"I'll admit it." Keeping the worn out puppy in his arms Connor's L.E.D. cycled to blue and he told Hank the truth. "I had no idea that one puppy could make such a big mess."

"And that's why I won't let you have one. We spend too much time at work for either of us to properly train a puppy."

"Yes. And leaving a puppy outside all day to prevent messes inside the house seems somehow cruel."

"Yup."

There was a soft knock at the front door to which Hank took the liberty of answering. Opening the door he was greeted by Mrs. Brilstein herself and she looked a little nervous where she stood. "Oh, hi." Hank greeted his neighbor kindly. "You must be here for Quincy."

"Hi, Hank!" Mrs. Brilstein appreciatively addressed the senior detective at the door. "Thank you so much for taking care of him for us. I'm so grateful."

With the puppy in his arms Connor walked to the front door and unwrapped Quincy from the towel. As he handed the sleepy puppy back to his rightful owner Connor gave her a kind smile and asked about Mr. Brilstein. "Is your husband okay?"

"Oh, yes. He'll be in a cast for the next six weeks but he's fine. Connor, I can't thank you enough for taking Quincy for me on such short notice. He still needs a lot of training, and can be a handful." Rubbing Quincy's ears Mrs. Brilstein noticed his freshly washed fur and knew he had been given a bath. "He wasn't too much trouble was he?"

"No, not at all." Connor expertly lied as he watched her affectionately rub the puppy's ears. "No worse than Sumo."

To that comment Sumo let out an offended grumble but stayed on the couch as he watched his masters at the opened doorway.

"Thank you again. If you ever need a favor just ask!"

"You're welcome, I was happy to help. Goodbye." Connor politely stated as she turned away and Hank closed the door behind her. "I just hope if this happens again Quincy will be much better trained."

Casually Hank turned away from the closed doors and crossed his arms over his chest as he gave Connor a knowing look. "How many messes did you have to clean up while I was out?"

"...Six." Connor admitted with a notable twinge of embarrassment. "All of them were... unique."

"You don't say?" The senior detective asked sarcastically as he looked at the wet stain in the center of Connor's now dirty t-shirt. "Still want a puppy?"

"Not at the moment, no." The deviant confessed again as he looked down at his messy shirt and quickly walked down the hallway to change his clothes in his bedroom. "For now I think Sumo is all the dog I want or need!"

-next chapter-