CHAPTER SEVEN
On my way back from the Distribution Center, I spot Jessica walking along the side of the road someway ahead which surprises me. She's a long way from home and at this time of the day would usually be helping her mother in their tailoring workshop. She turns and waves vigorously which I take as an indication to stop.
"Hey, Jess," I shout as I approach. "Do you need a ride somewhere?"
My purposely light-hearted tone hopefully conveys that her withering stares at the party when Mike and I returned, didn't resonate with me. I don't want to fall out with Jess – we've been friends since first grade. She is one of only two girls my age whose company I can tolerate for long. Angela is the other.
"Not a ride," she calls back as I approach, "but I'd like to talk. Is there somewhere private where we could go?"
There's no bitter ring to Jess's voice but it's not difficult to imagine what's on her mind. I pull Star to a halt and shuffle over so she can sit next to me. As always she's wearing a dress, this time in pale pink, with a cream-colored crocheted cardigan covering most of her arms. Jess only suffers to wear pants or cut-downs when she's obliged to help in the fields, which means she can proudly claim the title of the 'girliest girl in Forks.'
"I need to unload Mom's supplies first if that's okay?" I say when she's settled.
"Sure, I've got the rest of the afternoon free," Jess replies, then adds, "Mom didn't need me for long today. She's gone with Pa to pick up cloth and yarn from the warehouses. They won't be back 'til late."
We travel in silence which is very unusual for Jess until the entrance of Sam's farm comes into view. I wish I had Edward's ability to read minds. It's plain something is troubling her. I presume that it's Mike's indifference, but there could be something else.
"Any news on Sam's injuries," Jess asks out of the blue.
"Only that he's still not making any sense and is in a lot of pain. Two of his sisters have come home to help Martha with his care. The newly married sister's pregnant already so can't. According to my dad, Sam cannot walk or do anything for himself yet. Quite tragic really."
"Yeah, I suppose. Emily's had a lucky escape from that family though, don't you think?"
We both snigger at that comment because Jess is correct. Sam may be as sweet as pie when he's on his own with Emily, but there's no way Samuel would've made her welcome in his home. At my party, he called her family low-lives or something like that in front of everybody. I shudder at the memory because that is a stark reminder that if I'm forced to pick a partner in the next two to three years, I won't just be choosing a husband. The family that comes with him as part of the package will be an equally important choice. Maybe that's why Jess is so keen on Mike. The Newton household must be up there as one of the happiest homes in Lympi.
Jess helps me unharness Star and offload Mom's supplies into the pantry and cold cupboard. Mr Smith, the Distribution Manager, had written Mom a note about the amount of extra credit we'd accumulated since the summer. I leave it on the kitchen table for her to read before Charlie gets home. Thanks to Edward's efforts, there's plenty of credit now for coat material and the labor and I'm going to make sure Charlie doesn't conveniently forget her needs and order something for the farm or himself.
Jupiter wasn't in his normal spot by the range when Jess and I entered the kitchen. He won't be far though. After checking Jess's shoes are suitable for climbing, we take apples from the store cupboard and set off for my hill. On our way past the stable, we spot Jupiter bouncing up and down in front of Star's stall. Now they've become best buddies, maybe next time I go to the beach Jupiter could accompany me. I'd better check with Edward first though. Not everyone likes dogs and Jupiter is huge. His head fits under my armpit now.
Jess and I stop halfway up on a patch that's had the benefit of the sun for the last few hours. The grass dries out quickly there so she won't need to worry about stains on her dress. When we've eaten our apples I ask her what she wants to talk about even though the subject is obvious.
"Mike, Bella. I need to talk to you about him. Look, don't be concerned, I'm not mad about you and Mike disappearing at the party. You're first cousins, so there's no way you two will end up together. I just want your opinion on whether I'm doing anything wrong. You know him better than anyone outside his immediate family. Am I wasting my time here?"
Ouch! How am I to answer Jess's direct question without hurting her feelings? Bella Swan is probably the last person in Lympi she should ask for advice on dating and romance. Being truthful is usually the best path to take, but maybe softening the blow slightly in this instance will hurt Jess less. I don't want to devastate her even more than she already is. Deep breath, Bella, here goes.
"Honestly, Jess, I don't know whether you're wasting your time, but if you really do want my advice, I suggest you back off for a while. Everyone in Forks knows you want to marry Mike. Can you imagine how he feels about that? He only turned eighteen three months ago and as far as I know, he hasn't shown any interest in dating anybody yet. Maybe he's not ready to start hooking up with a girl."
Jessica scoffs at my cop-out. "That's ridiculous, Bella. Everyone's gagging for it by eighteen, especially the boys. I'd get married next week if Mike asked. At least guys can jerk off their frustrations."
I can't stop my eyes widening at Jess's statement. I know what she's talking about of course. A girl can't get through fourth grade without hearing about what boys get up to in the privacy of their rooms and it's always their sisters who spill the beans on them. Genuinely though, Jess has taken me by surprise. I would never have thought the physical side of a relationship would be a factor in her desperation to marry Mike. I have to tell her that not all eighteen-year-olds think like that. Well, I certainly don't.
"It's not ridiculous, Jess. I'm nowhere near ready to date and I'm not desperate for sex either."
"Well, that's because you haven't met the guy you want to spend the rest of your life with. My nights are spent dreaming about what Mike and I could be getting up to in bed, and all the time we're wasting. Makes me want to scream."
I'm tempted to refute that but she's probably right. The only boy or man whom I'm remotely attracted to is Edward, who alas is significantly less of a marriage prospect than Mike. That thought depresses me. I would love to be married and have kids someday, but I know I'll be comparing any prospective partner to Edward which is ridiculous. Besides the annoying fact that he's a Catcher, I hardly know the guy. My attraction to him is purely physical, but not in that kind of physical way ... yet. I have to respond to Jess's accusation though.
"Yeah, I'm not going to deny that no one floats my boat in Forks. But Jess, why the rush? Are you that desperate to leave home? I'm not, and I know I won't be for a long while."
"Yes and no," Jess replies quietly after a pause, and I note she swallows a few times before continuing. "Mom and Pa argue a lot - of course, that's when they're speaking to one another. It's a fact of life that my brother and I have had to put up with for years. There's always tension in our house and I hate living like that. Pa flies into rages at the slightest thing, not just at Mom, but at me and Jack too."
Jess pauses but I don't say anything. There's something else troubling her. She pulls her knees up to her chest and hugs them. Could Jess be hugging someone else in her subconscious or is she hugging herself now? There's a tear in the corner of her eye. I continue to stay silent. Jess eventually continues.
"Lately, Mom has been subdued, Bella. I've asked her what's wrong but she won't speak about why. Last week I noticed a bruise on her lower arm just above her wrist. Yesterday there was an even bigger one on her leg, like she'd been kicked. She says they're nothing, but I'm starting to believe that Pa has hit her. Yes, I want to leave home to live somewhere happy with Mike, but no, I don't want to leave Mom if that's what Pa's doing to her."
Jess wipes her face with her sleeve. I shuffle over and put my arm around her. Jeepers I know my parents argue a lot, but Charlie would never lay a finger on Mom. I'm positive of that.
"Jess, I'm so sorry. I don't know what to say."
"Yeah, it's shit, isn't it. I genuinely don't know how to handle this situation. I'm not brave enough to question Pa about the bruises but I can't ignore them. She's my Mom and I love her.
Jess sobs into my shoulder so I hold her until she's cried out. Dark clouds have begun to gather over the mountain to the north of us which usually means heavy rain is on the way. I whisper to her that we need to get off the hill before it gets slippery and dangerous. Jess nods so I help her up.
On the way down I offer to harness the cart and take her home.
"No, I'll be fine," she says with one eye on the darkening sky.
"I insist," I insist. "You'll get drenched if you walk that distance. Look, while I'm getting Star harnessed up, you go indoors and get a couple of coats off the hooks and tell Mom where we're going."
Jess relents and squeezes my hand. "Thanks, Bella. I can make a start on dinner if I get home before Mom and Dad. That might ease the tension in the house tonight."
On the way back to Jess's, we talk about the party and Jake's attitude towards me which she agrees is bordering on obsessive. She seems to be in a better mood now she's shared what had been troubling her. I hope she's wrong about her father and that he isn't being horrible to her mom. I don't know Mr Stanley well, but I couldn't imagine him doing anything like that but then I didn't know that there was so much strife in the Stanley home.
We're almost at her house when I have an idea to give Jess something else to think about. Because of how my mind was working last night about starting a revolution, I'm going to risk sounding her out with a rebellious comment, purely to test her reaction.
"Jess, I've decided that if I don't meet a guy that I'm happy to spend my life with before I'm twenty-one, I'm going to refuse to marry whoever's allocated to me, and I don't care what the Elders say or do. They can lock me away for good for all I care. I'm determined not to be sold off like a broodmare. Are you shocked?"
Her immediate and almost scornful response is not what I anticipated.
"Yeah, tell me something I don't already know."
"What!" I squeak.
"Oh come on, Bella. You've been building up to this all of your life. We've been expecting you to kick off since you were about twelve. If it hadn't been for Mike making you keep your mouth shut in class, you would've been in serious trouble with the Principal from the third grade upwards."
I go to interrupt but Jess carries on.
"And you're not the only one who thinks like that. We all do. Okay maybe you're the only one who vocalizes that life isn't fair to anyone who'll listen, but we're all pissed about the rules. It's only because I know who I want to marry that I'm not up for rebelling. The others don't have the guts to dare."
"Who are 'we,' Jess?"
"Kids from school, my parents, Mike's parents I guess, practically everyone I know grumbles in private about how restricted we are."
"So are any of the other kids up for rebelling, like me?"
"I doubt it. Nobody in the past has as far as I know. Everyone follows the rules like sheep. There's no alternative, Bella. If you rebelled, for instance, your parents would lose their farm. The Elders won't tolerate anybody standing up to them. They'll come down on you and your family hard."
The idea of starting a revolution instantly becomes less appealing.
"Jeepers, what sort of society do we live in?" I reply angrily. "I guessed I'd get my knuckles rapped, but losing the farm … I couldn't do that to Mom and Dad."
"And that's why we all conform, Bella," Jess replies in a sing-song voice. "The Elders would make your life very unpleasant and would probably relish making an example of you. I know my dad despises the Elders. I've overheard him talking with my uncle about what he would do to them if he could get away with it. They've got us where they want us. But even silly, frivolous, Jessica Stanley, who doesn't give a toss about anything other than marrying Mike, wonders why we have to live like this. I mean, who is benefitting and who are these Elders anyway?"
We sit in silence for the few minutes remaining while I ponder Jess's profound statement, which is totally out of character. When we pull up outside her house on the outskirts of Forks where her mom runs her tailoring business, she takes off the borrowed coat, kisses my cheek, and thanks me for listening to her and for the ride. Her parents aren't home yet so her brother Jack opens the door for her. He waves after he hugs Jess before closing the door. He's fourteen but looks older. From what I've heard recently he's grown into a really nice kid.
Rain is in the air as Star turns towards home. Away from the town, a cold wind is now whipping across the fields causing leaves, twigs, and loose strands of hair to slap into my face. The hood on my jacket is worse than useless. I have to abandon trying to keep it in place as Star's reins need two hands when she's jumpy. Jess's spare coat pulled across my knees and tucked under my legs at least helps to keep my lower half warm and I'm grateful for that.
Crackles in the air tell me the storm is close so I urge Star to speed up. I've never been out this late on my own so I know Mom will be worried sick. Darkness doesn't frighten me, but weather and wild animals do. Twilight is when the nasty ones emerge from their lairs and roam the fields and woodlands looking for prey. Star's ears are constantly twitching now indicating she's just as nervous as me which makes me feel guilty. She should be in her warm stable instead of being battered by the elements. I couldn't have let Jess walk home alone though.
Without warning, Star neighs loudly which makes me jump. I'm even more tense than before because I trust her instincts. I should be looking around to see what's spooked her but daren't take my eyes from anywhere but the road ahead. Debris from the fields is now sliding across our path. Maybe something hit Star's legs and that's what upset her. "Come on Star," I shout encouragingly. "We're not far from home now." Star neighs again but she's not happy. Her head is bobbing up and down. I hope there's nothing out there more sinister than the oncoming storm.
Ahead there's a long bend where the cart has to slow because of the state of the road. Holes that would shake the cart to pieces are more difficult to spot in the half-light so we approach with caution, which is the last thing I want to do right now. Star doesn't need direction from me as she knows the road well. As we get closer to the bend she heads further to the right where there's less damage but is still hazardous. All four wheels are crossing the bumpy part when Star unexpectedly halts, rears up, and throws her forelegs in the air. I'm propelled backward then forward and just manage to stop myself from falling between the cart and Star's backside.
When I've righted myself and have the reins in the right order, I spot movement in the woodland on the right side of the road. In the cart, there is nothing I could use to defend myself. Fear takes hold. Could this be a bear, a wolf, or a Catcher? Whatever is there, I'm too scared to do anything other than encourage Star to get moving which she ignores. She's as frightened as I am.
More movement, and then I see her. A young woman with jaw-length black hair, wearing a long shiny coat in an indeterminate color that almost touches the floor. She steps into the road and stares at me, which is when I recognize what she is. Even in the dim light, her eyes give her away. Despite Edward's assurances about Catchers, I'm still terrified. Has she come to take me away tonight? Is my time really up now?
"Isabella I presume," she says in a light, musical voice.
I can't speak. The woman smiles and takes a step forward. Star snorts and pushes the cart backward.
"Don't be frightened, Isabella. I am not here to harm you, even though you made my brother late for my party. I forgave him though when he explained the circumstances. I'm here for another reason tonight, but Edward wanted me to ask whether you plan to go to the beach tomorrow."
I nod my head.
"He also told me to say don't think badly of us. A member of your community will be gone by the morning but it's not what you think. Now go home, Isabella. There's a violent storm brewing over the mountains. My kind can do many incredible things, but we cannot control the weather."
And then she disappears, just as the first lightning fork blinds me.
Without encouragement, Star gallops faster than she ever has before. By the time we turn into our yard freezing rain is slicing into my face which masks the tears streaming down my cheeks. Charlie runs out of the house in full wet weather gear shouting at me to get inside while he stables Star. I'm so grateful I could kiss him.
After hot soup and two more of Mom's awesome pasties, followed by a bath and a hair wash, my bed is the only place I want to be. The storm has moved westwards but now and again the room lights up followed by a low rumble. The windows are shut tight against the rain which hasn't diminished. I have no doubt sections of the road to the beach will be underwater tomorrow.
Not for the first time I dread the morning. Instead of Samuel raging about Sam's disappearance, a new family will be grieving a loved one snatched by the Catchers. Who will it be this time? Someone I know well and who I'll miss? I do not doubt that at all.
What did Edward's sister even mean by her reassuring words? 'It's not what you think.' How could taking a loved one from a family be anything other than a tragedy? My next decision must be, do I confront Edward at the beach tomorrow? I should be looking forward to seeing him and hopefully having some of my questions answered, but instead, the time has come for someone to stand up for my community against the Catchers.
Before sleep overtakes me I can't help but laugh. The community I'm preparing to defend is the same one I've been trashing for years. But then I remember the actual community is the people and has nothing to do with the way we have to live. My issues now are with the Catchers just as much as with the Elders.
So who do you think will be gone by the morning, and what did Alice mean by 'it's not what you think?' Are Catchers taking people at random, or for a specific reason or purpose? Whichever it is, Edward will have a lot of explaining to do on the beach tomorrow. Feisty Bella won't hold back.
Thanks for all the explanations about the saying 'Way to go.' I think I'm clearer now. It's being used in the UK a lot which is why I asked. Every day is a school day, haha.
See you on Friday,
Joan x