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Thank you for reading and please enjoy
Reality Viewing: Naruto the Quirky Villain
-Chapter 4-
'That was the most embarrassing moment of my life.' Mirko thought, a scowl and light blush on her face as she readjusted her clothes to make sure everything was where it should be before leveling a solid glare on the only other person currently in the room. "If you tell anybody about what just happened, I swear I'll-"
"Kick my ass so hard my great, great grandchildren will feel it or something like that," Midnight cut in with an amused roll of her eyes as she dropped a small pink kiddy pail into a hazardous waste bin that was stored inside a nearby cabinet. "Relax will you, I may like to tease people but even I know where to draw the line Mirko."
"Sure you do, and I'm a pacifist." The rabbit woman scoffed sarcastically wiles crossing her arms, making Midnight giggle at how childish her fellow Pro Hero looked. She wasn't offended at all by the accusation since teasing and embarrassing others were some of the most iconic things she was known for, only topped by the sultry showmanship that earned her the title Adult Only Hero.
Hell, even now the purplette had a few snappy retorts on the tip of her tongue that would perfect for this situation. Sadly for Midnight though, she was unable to use any of them as Mei marched into the room with Tsuyu, Mina, and Toru joining a few moments later.
"Phew… that's so much better," The busty pink-haired inventor said as she sank into her spot with a sigh of relief. "My bladder was gonna explode if I held that in for any longer."
"If it was so bad then why didn't you go earlier, ribbit?" Tsuyu asked with a titled head while her and her classmates took their own seats.
"Well I was gonna but I got side-tracked when the idea for The Viewer popped in my head yesterday so I decided to sketch up a quick blueprint for it so I would forget, then figured I might as well get the basic components all set up, and after that I thought it wouldn't hurt to sort out the wiring while I was at it" Mei said, patting the side of her invention with a grin before frowning as she shot Mirko a dirty look. "The next thing I know, I'm testing my new baby with Izuku's help when Ms. Impatient here almost breaks it and it kinda slipped my mind until now."
"Ah, I guess that makes…" The frog girl started say while nodding in agreement, only to stop midsentence when a certain part of the pinkette's explanation registered in her mind. "Wait, yesterday? You've been holding it since yesterday ribbit?"
"The day before actually," Mei admitted casually, already tinkering with an invention she'd pulled out of her pocket and thus completely missing as everyone else stared at her dumbfoundedly with hanging jaws. "There are so many super cute babies to make and taking a bathroom break would have just slowed me down. I've been asking Power Loader-sensei if I could just get a catheter put in since that would save so much time but he just keeps saying how I can't use equipment like that without a proper medical reason."
…
"Oh hey, my baby's done loading." The pinkette said as The Viewer's projection started playing again, snapping the rest of the group from their stunned disbelief.
"Oh, Kurama and Mirko are at it again."
"Son of a bitch, we've become the norm." Mirko muttered with a facepalm while Toru patted her shoulder supportingly upon hearing how casually that statement was made, showing just how used people were to seeing her other self trying (and failing) to catch the illusive blonde.
The citizens of the city of Tokyo were greeted once more to the sight of Mirko giving a heated chase after the rising star of villains Kurama. A few teenagers had taken to start wearing orange hoodies because of how cool the new villain was, and some clothing items were becoming really popular because of it.
"You can catch him Mirko!"
"She's got nothing on you Kurama, show her that you are just way to slippery!"
"I'm honestly not surprised, ribbit." Tsuyu stated as the screen briefly showed a few people wearing Kurama themed clothing or accessories while they cheered the fleeing blonde on.
"Me either, he's just too charismatic and funny to really dislike," Mina agreed with a nod, before grinning deviously as she rubbed her hands together. "The real question is how long for people to start shipping him, ten bucks says the first one is Mirama."
"Ah come on, that one's a total given already," Midnight said with a scoff. "I got thirty that the second one is Ryurama."
"Oh! That's a good one!" Toru exclaimed excitedly.
"Mirama?" Mirko repeated in confusion as the four started tossing different shipping names and pairings.
"It's a ship name, usually made by those who think that people are or should be a couple by mashing their names together into one," Tsuyu explained in her usual blunt way. "In this case they are using yours and Naruto's alias names. Simply put, Mirko plus Kurama equal Mirama."
"Oh, well that stupid," Mirko muttered with a roll of her eyes… before rubbing her chin thoughtfully. 'Though Mirama does sound kinda cute.'
Naruto grinned as he back flipped over a crowd of people, and Mirko landed in front of him. She spun in the air and kicked at him, spinning around and throwing a punch at him the second her kick missed. Naruto had updated his villain costume, instead of wearing a medical mask like usual, he had actually bought a black mask to cover the lower half of his face and neck. Since it was the dead middle of the winter, this was not only to make him look cooler, but to also keep him warmer through the cold months.
"Functional as well as fashionable," Midnight said with an approving nod. "That is what you should always aim for when it comes to costume design."
"Unless you want to end up like Magma Man or Stratogale." Mirko added before her and Midnight bowed their heads briefly in respect to their fallen comrades. The former had forgotten to make sure his whole outfit was resistant to molten rock while the latter suffered from an unfortunate incident with a jet liner.
Mirko was really on fire with her combos.
She threw her power around, and her speed was nothing to scoff at either. Naruto's agility though wasn't something that was easy to handle, even for the hero who dealt with him more than any other hero. His agility wasn't a threat, were it not for the fact that he was so unpredictable, not having the usual thought process of a villain.
Mirko was grinning.
"Uh, why does she look so happy?" Toru asked curiously as the side of her shirt crinkled to show that she was tilting her head.
"Because I like a challenge," Mirko stated, a wistful sigh escaping her lips while she spoke. "Most villains go down in like two seconds so it would honestly be kinda nice to have somebody who could actually make me work for the win for once."
"Or in this case, any victory at all." Mina couldn't help but quip with a teasing smirk which only grew upon the middle finger she got from the trapped bunny woman.
"You're heading down to jail with me punk." Mirko put her hands on the ground, and did the splits, spinning around and throwing a dozen fast kicks his direction.
"Oh-ho, gonna take him to prison personally huh?" Midnight sidled up next to Mirko and wiggled her brows suggestively, earning an annoyed glare from her fellow Pro Hero. "Sounds like fun, should we get the private interrogation room ready?"
"Stuff it you wannabe stripper."
"I didn't know you were into that sort of thing, how kinky."
"Seriously, why are you even allowed to teach children?"
"Cause I'm sexy and everybody knows it~!"
Naruto leaned backwards, and she fired off a downward kick, so he flipped as she shattered concrete. She was wearing replacements for all of the costume parts that he had stolen, and he had stolen multiple copies of things from her, but never the leotard. He had never escaped her in a place where he could steal that without leaving her naked in public.
"You know, for how perverted and dirty that should sound, it actually comes off as kind of sweet, ribbit." Tsuyu said as she tapped her chin.
"Just a little bit." Mei agreed without looking up from the device she was fiddling with.
"In a weird sort of way." Mina added with a thoughtful expression.
Naruto's grin was more easily visible through his current mask.
"Ah Bun-Bun, I really do love it when you're feisty." Naruto leaned forward as she corrected her posture, and tapped his finger against the tip of her nose.
"Aw, he booped her~." Toru and Mina gushed while Mirko blushed lightly as Midnight nudged her side with another wiggle of her brow, though whether it was in embarrassment or frustration was indeterminable.
With her teeth, she made to bite him, but he jerked his hand back. "Now that was just rude, here I am-" Naruto side stepped a punch aimed at his face, and spun around and swung her leg after. Ducking her kick, he reached up and grabbed her leg, her power throwing him into the air. "-just loving that cute widdle button nose you have, and you attack me." Naruto grabbed onto the traffic signal, spun around, and balanced on top of it.
Mirko blushed in anger, covering her nose with her hand even as she jumped towards Naruto again, landing on the traffic signal with him.
Everybody aside from Mirko burst into fits of giggles and/or gushing as they watched the byplay between the battling duo.
"Hahahaha! God damn, that kid is a riot! Hahahaha!" Midnight said between fits of laughter, doubling over as she hugged her stomach.
"Ugh, would you stop it, it wasn't that funny." Mirko grumbled with an irritated huff while her cheeks turned even redder.
She was agile too, and she was able to continue fighting even on the cramped space.
"Hey punk, what the hell are you even doing as a villain, if you're so skilled, why the hell aren't you applying for a hero school? Instead of causing all this trouble." Mirko uncovered her nose and started to throw some punches, her arms weren't even close to as strong as her legs, but she had enough strength in her muscle to hurt a grown man with ease.
"Oh my, sounds like somebody's recruiting for a new sidekick, doesn't it Midnight-sensei?" Mina asked with a teasing grin that was mirrored by the adult-themed hero.
"Why yes, yes it does my dear student. I can't blame her though, I'd love to have such a flexible young man working under me."
As the student-teacher pair spoke, they leaned in on either side of Mirko while their grins turned mischievous. In response the rabbit themed heroine glowered at them with an irritated expression and flushed face, making both burst into fits of giggles.
Naruto dodged by slipping so that he was standing upside down, defying gravity as he looked upwards at Mirko. She jumped off the side and used her hands to hang onto the traffic signal, before she started to throw kicks at him as she hung. He dodged as if he were standing the right way up.
"Uuuurp, that looks so cool but I think I'm starting to get dizzy just watching," Toru groaned queasily as the screen kept spinning and shifting to match the onscreen duo's constantly changing perspective of view. "How do you guys handle that?"
"Years of practice and lots of brown paper bags." Midnight stated calmly like it was no big deal, though if you looked closely you could see the edge of green forming on her cheeks.
"I think the real question, is why are you still single... men too afraid of being choked out by your thighs? Let me tell you, that isn't the worst way to go." Naruto avoided the question completely as he teased her some more.
Once again everyone in the room aside from poor Mirko fell in hysterics at the disguised blonde's statement, while the whitette herself scowled as her entire face turned a bright cherry red.
'HA! I think somebody hit the nail right on the head with that one.' Midnight thought with a grin when she noticed the shame and embarrassment that briefly flashed across both Mirkos faces while the 'real' one unconsciously crossed her legs.
Mirko watched him drop and land in the back of a moving truck, so she swung around and soared through the air, landing in the bed of the truck after him.
"Oh getting in bed with him huh? Spicy~."
"Will you fucking stop that!" Mirko yelled at Midnight, finally snapping as her brow twitching rapidly so rapidly it looked ready to fly off and veins bulging on her forehead.
Snickering at the whitette's reaction, Midnight held her hands up in faux surrender. "Alright, alright, no more double entendres."
"…Thank you."
"Until the next one~!"
"God damn it!"
"No, seriously, if you were a serious villain, I'm pretty sure a ton of heroes would be dead... you would be a real threat to heroes if you weren't so... weird for a villain." Mirko couldn't understand why anyone would waste such skill on something like... collecting hero trophies like this. She would say theft, but he never actually completed his thefts, he returned the item he stole every time, because they were never his objective. "The other heroes just think you're some punk, or an annoying kid, but on your debut as a villain, you took me down... you've never thrown a single punch at a single hero, or threatened even a single civilian." Mirko had never seen this villain attack even a single person, even when they were attacking him.
He only ever evaded them until he was able to take them down in a rather non-violent way.
"That kinda makes him even more impressive as a villain now that I think about it," Tsuyu said as she tapped her chin. "To be able to not only escape but also defeat multiple heroes in an unbeaten streak without actually ever going on the offensive, you'd have to be incredibly skilled to pull that off."
"Which will only make it that much more satisfying when I get my hands around his little neck and…" Mirko trailed off into a series of incomprehensible muttering while clenching her hands so tightly her whole fists turned white.
"You know, I'm starting to think Midori's muttering habit is contagious." Mina whispered to Toru jokingly, getting another giggle from the invisible girl.
Even now, he jumped off the truck when she aimed a high kick at his chin. He rolled across the street and onto the sidewalk, and she was quick to follow him, and try to slam her foot into his chest.
What?
His non-violence aside, she still wanted to hurt him for escaping her so many times.
"I've never really been in a fight, and it doesn't sound like fun to hurt people." Naruto did answer that at least as rolled from his back to his feet. It was getting a lot harder to escape Mirko, she was getting used to the way he evaded her. Usually, he would have already given her a kiss and knocked her out. Mirko, since she was the first person that he escaped from, was something of a special hero. He liked to finish her off the same way each time, an almost chaste kiss to the lips.
She was grinning when she realized the same thing as him.
"Aww, how sweet," Midnight cooed as her grin somehow managed to grow even wider. "He treats you special because you were his first. How's that make you feel Mirko?"
"Die in a fire."
"Having a hard time."
"Of course I'm going to be hard, you keep showing off those thighs and ass all the time." Naruto made a joke of her statement.
"Can't really argue with him there." Mina stated as everyone glanced at the pinned heroine, or more specifically her hero outfit, which left practically nothing to the imagination what-so-ever.
He didn't want to show any of the other abilities of his Quirk relating to his toad nature. The more he revealed about his Quirk, the easier it would be for them to try and find him because of the Quirk registry.
"It's actually kind of sad how many villains honestly forget about that little fact when they go to commit a crime." Midnight said with a dull look as she tried to tally up just how many times she'd seen criminals that thought they'd made a clean getaway be shocked when she and the police would come busting through their door.
She lost count somewhere in the low hundreds.
"It's Kurama and Mirko... IN PERSON!"
"Gonna be late for work, yeah, a hero and villain are going at it."
It was hard for people not to notice them as Naruto made a show of weaving his way through her attacks. Naruto felt the heat pads under his clothes start to lose the heat they were giving him, and he had to grin.
"Looks like Mirko is not the only one enjoying the challenge." Toru said with a giggle, getting a small round of nods and agreements.
"Aaaaaaah!"
"Shit." Mirko whispered when she saw a scream, and saw a flipped car was rolling across the street towards a group of people crossing the road.
…
"That was random, ribbit." Tsuyu stated what most of the room was thinking, blinking in surprise at the sudden interruption.
"That was probably thanks to the unexpected variables programing." Mei said with a grin, the only one completely unfazed by the unexpected change.
She abandoned her prey, and rushed towards the truck. The truck was spinning and flipping out of control, showing that somebody had decided to ignore the speed limit under the icy road conditions. She braced herself, and stared down the truck as it slammed into her. She dug her feet into the street, and was pushed back, slowing down the truck with her body before it could hit the crowd of people that were behind her.
"Oooooh, gonna be feeling that one in the morning." Mirko hissed with a slight wince as she saw her other take two tons of steel right to the face. That would definitely leave her feeling tender for a while, not to mention there was a good chance that that breaking metal could end up cutting or stabbing her, which was never fun to deal with.
The crowd behind her was safe.
The driver wasn't though, he had been sent flying out of the front window when she had used her body as a shield.
At this point the video suddenly changed to slow motion while an indicator on the edge of the protection blinked on reading 'Perspective Mode 15X', thus allowing the group to watch as the unfortunate driver smashed through his windshield and went airborne.
"And that ladies, is why you should always wear your seat belt." Midnight said with a grimace that everyone else shared as they watched the man's impromptu flight.
Her feet dug firmly into the street, and her body stuck in the metal truck and slightly injured, she would be unable to stop the man from flying into incoming traffic.
The driver wasn't hit by a car though.
Naruto, without even thinking about it, jumped towards the man and grabbed him by the back of his shirt, throwing him out of the way of a truck. He was not going to be injured, Naruto had thrown him a clear 20 feet away, so he was going to be hurt, but he wasn't as hurt as Naruto was going to be.
"Shit! Move ki-" Mirko started to yell reflexively as she realized what was about to happen, only to be cut off as the video abruptly switched back to normal speed.
Hit by the truck that nearly killed the man, Naruto was knocked into the air behind the truck, before he was run over by a second car that rolled over him. Cars came skidding to a halt moments later.
...
Silence filled the room once more as everyone stared at the scene in shock, their jaws hanging wide open. Mei even ended up dropping the device she was tinkering with, allowing it to clatter against the ground.
"... Shit..." Mirko whispered when she saw her target was unmoving on the ground, her eyes starting to widen as traffic came to a screeching halt. She dug herself out of the street, her forearms bruised and possibly broken from taking the brunt of the force of the truck. She ran towards the villain's body and saw him laying face down on the other, turning him over, she saw his eyes were closed. "... He..."
"Oh my god." Mina cupped her mouth as her eyes starting to water a bit.
"Is he… is he really…" Toru tried to ask, only end up trailing off each time.
Nobody else could say anything, or do anything for that manner as they just kept staring at the blonde's motionless bo-
Naruto's eyes shot open and he leaned up, lowering his mask when his face was too close for her to see it clearly, and he planted a kiss on her lips.
"Oh thank goodness." Mina and Toru said as the tension immediately vanished from the room…
"That little bastard!"
And was promptly replaced with feminine fury as an angry Mirko screamed at the screen.
Pulling his mask up before she could see it, the poison took effect and she collapsed on the ground next to him.
Naruto looked down at Mirko now that she could barely move, and he tapped the tip of her nose.
"Just kidding, and I'll be taking this... and giving this back to you." Naruto stood up and tossed her a new phone that he stole, after he took her fuzzy neck warmer again. Standing up and winking down at her, Naruto jumped up to the top of the nearest building as more heroes started to arrive.
"You punk! I'll get you!"
"Twist his limbs… bash that smug grin off… show him to scare me like that… need a dentist afterwards…"
"Don't forget the spanking, naughty boys like him need a good paddling." Midnight added amusedly before giggling when Mirko started to nod in agreement until the whitette realized what had been said.
"Will you stop that?!"
"Nope~!"
-Several Minutes Later-
"Oh my god, this hurts so much... fuck... shit... damn, this was the closest chase yet... but damn wasn't it fun." Naruto grinned as he looked at the bruises that were forming on his chest and back, where he had gotten hit by a truck, and run over by a car.
While everybody else in the room hissed in sympathy or cringed at the sight of the blonde's injuries, Mirko gave a low impressed whistle. "For a guy who always avoids taking a hit he has got some serious pain tolerance if he's still able to move around in that condition."
"No kidding, I'm pretty sure he's more bruise than person at this point." Mina said, cupping her mouth again as her cheeks turned a bit green.
His body had moved on its own, and this was the price he had to pay for his act of heroism. "... maybe next time I'll go see how much luck goes with EraserHead or Midnight, I haven't taken anything from them... uuuh..." Naruto groaned in pain.
"Oh-ho~, he wants to hang out with little old me? I best make sure to show him a good time then." The adult rated heroine said sultrily while playfully licking her lips.
Rolling her eyes at the purplette's antics, Mirko couldn't help the vicious grin that formed on her lips. "I am going to enjoy seeing him kick your ass."
"Ribbit, actually I'd say Midnight-sensei has a pretty good chance of beating him," Tsuyu stated, getting the rabbit woman's attention. "She'll know to avoid letting him near her mouth because of his tendency for poisoning is likely well known by now and her quirk could just as quickly incapacitate him as his could her if he's not careful."
"…Fuck." Mirko swore with her arms crossed, doing her best to ignore the smug grin Midnight was sending her way.
Forcing himself to stand up, Naruto started to walk normally, out of costume, in the direction of the orphanage. Right now, the caretakers were on duty so they were watching the kids, but it was approaching 6, and the kids needed somebody to help them with their homework, and make them a snack before they went to bed.
He was going to be hurting tomorrow.
"Awww, that's so sweet of him." Toru gushed as she… did something with her hands, still invisible so can't really tell what exactly, as the projection went back to buffering.
"Sweet sure, but he should really take it easy or preferably see a doctor," Mina said slightly queasily, "Those injuries looked pretty serious."
"Except then he'd have to try and explain how he got those injuries in the first place which would probably expose him as Kurama, ribbit." Tsuyu pointed out as the pink teen facepalmed.
"Right, forgot about that."
'Working through the pain, no excuses.' Mirko thought with an approving nod, her respect for the annoying blonde going up a few notches.
-End Chapter-