NOTE: Hiccupped_Studios has provided some beautiful art for this chapter, but because of formatting rules on fanfic, I cannot embed or link to it here. You can find it on the Ao3 version of this story. My username is still gigi256 and it is featured at the end of chapter 32.

ROSE

"Hey, I was wondering where you went?" Dimitri stood in the empty entryway to my new mini-gym, checkered pajama pants slung low on his hips and hair still ruffled from sleep. I had been so lost in my own head that I hadn't even heard him come over. Granted, he was practically silent when he moved, so maybe he just snuck up on me. I reached towards the little table holding my phone and grabbed my water bottle. He watched as I took a long sip, eyes raking over my throat in an almost hungry manner before asking, "How long have you been down here?"

"Depends. What time is it?" My traitorous mind had pulled from sleep way too early. It was as if something in the back of my mind was whispering, 'it's his last day; you better make the most of it.' Any rational person would have taken that to mean 'stay in bed and cuddle' until well after the sun had risen, but I never claimed to be rational. Plus, he had looked so peaceful, and I knew that he wouldn't have many opportunities to sleep in once he went back to work, so I didn't want my tossing and turning to wake him. Instead, I figured I could work off some of my growing anxiety and hopefully be ready to face the day with a smile once he was finally awake. I hadn't even bothered to change into proper workout gear, deciding that my sleep shorts and oversized shirt would do well enough for an impromptu weight session.

Dimitri pulled his phone from his pocket, the harsh blue light giving him an odd glow for a moment. "It's just about seven now."

"About an hour, then." It certainly felt like more. "Sorry. I hope I didn't wake you."

"You didn't, not really, but I think I eventually realized you weren't there, and then I couldn't get back to sleep. Figured I'd come to find you." His eyes quickly flit to the dumbbells resting on the bench in front of me. "What are you using these days? 20lb?"

"Fifteen pounds...or seven kilograms, I guess. I'm still getting used to the conversion stuff. Either way, I figured since I didn't need to build the muscle as much as just keep my endurance up and stay toned so I dropped a little and added more reps." Our conversation was a little stilted as we tried to swim in the safe waters of training and exercise, but I think we both were trying to avoid acknowledging the silent countdown clock ticking second by second in the back of our minds.

Dimitri nodded absentmindedly before fully stepping into the room and crossing the small space between us. As he got closer, he stripped off his shirt and gestured for me to scoot up a little on the bench until he could settle behind me. A beat later, his arms were around my waist in a solid embrace that grounded me to the moment. There was just here and now. I wasn't sure how he did it, but things always seemed more manageable in his arms. One touch and all my worries were forgotten, even if it was only for a little while.

I felt his kiss in my hair. And then another. Then the rough line of his jaw, still dusted with stubble, brushed against the soft skin beneath my ear. I hissed, pressing closer to the sting rather than pulling away. I craved it. I craved the burn that was so sharply contrasted by his hot breath fanning over my cheek like a gentle breeze.

"Grab the weights," he commanded in a low growl that left me shivering and all too eager to comply. I whimpered when he nipped at my ear. "Hold them at your side, and don't you dare let go. Do you understand?"

I nodded, ready to do anything he asked as long as he continued to touch me. As I scrambled to grab the weights, he tugged on my shirt and pulled it over my head, leaving us skin-to-skin as I leaned back into him with a dumbbell hanging to either side of me.

His hands began to wander, gliding along my waist and stomach before meandering upwards past my breasts. Five fingers wrapped around my neck, and suddenly it was like I couldn't breathe. It was a gentle hold, but one that still stole each plea for his touch away from me in little gasps and pants. The weights I was holding felt so much heavier than they had before. They pulled me down. Kept me immobile. They kept me at his mercy as his hands laid claim to every inch of my body.

I arched back into him when I felt a gentle pinch at my nipple, his fingers circling the bud away a minute later to soothe the sting.

"Do you like that, Roza? Do you like my hands on your body? Your breasts? Do you like it when I touch you like this?"

I nodded quickly, trying to ignore the growing burning in my arms. It would have been kinder if Dimitri had handcuffed me or something. At least then, I could fight my restraints rather than being forced to rely on my own discipline.

"I like it too. I like seeing how much you squirm when I touch you." Dimitri hummed in approval, a teasing sound that rumbled over my skin as he played with me. Even though he hadn't restricted my breathing, I all but gasped as Dimitri released his hold over my throat and let my head fall back against his shoulder. He caught my lust-laden eyes for a moment, his slightly lifted brow wordlessly asking me, 'Too much?'

God, no. It was perfect. Every time he touched me, it was perfect. And when he could see that I wasn't going to protest his little act of controlled possessiveness, he gave me a saucy grin. Something told me that I'd be wearing his hand like a necklace again in the future.

A pull against the waistband of my shorts caught my attention as Dimitri edged one hand beneath the loose cotton fabric. He didn't slip under my panties, however, deciding to taunt me instead as he lightly rubbed one finger up and down the gusset so casually that I was tempted to scream. Or beg. Or both.

I knew he could feel how turned on I was now. I'm sure my underwear was soaked, but I didn't have the mental ability to feel embarrassed about something like that. Instead, I tried to rock against his touch in a desperate plea for more and earned myself a deep growl as he pulled his touch away for a moment.

I whimpered, crying at the loss. "You're being mean." My arms started to shake a little without his caress to distract me.

"And you're being a brat. Keep holding tight to the weights." He waited for me to adjust my grip a moment before he started playing with me again. "Боже мой. The things your body does to me. Do you know how hard it was to just keep from staring at you constantly? I must have been so obvious, but you were—you are—just too captivating. Too tempting. I couldn't resist."

While he had been anything but obvious at first, I did remember a few early moments here and there where I'd turn to ask Dimitri a question during practice, only to catch him glance away quickly. Those little looks turned into touches that lingered too long, and everything pretty much snowballed from there. I may or may not have helped things along, though. It's amazing what a good sports bra can do.

I moaned, nearly dropping the weights as Dimitri pushed aside the thin fabric of my underwear and dipped a finger inside me. He had so thoroughly primed me that he slipped in easily, and he was able to add a second finger a moment later. With one hand on my hip and the other gently sliding in and out at an excruciating pace, I felt him pull me closer to him until his hard length was pressed firmly against my bottom. If we had stripped down, it wouldn't have taken much for him to bend me over against the bench and take me however he pleased. The very thought made my pulse against his fingers for a moment.

"Mmm." He hummed as if I was some delectable treat made just for him. "That's it. I want to feel you let go. I want to watch as you fall apart in my arms. Come for me, Милая."

Oh, how I wanted that too. I needed a little more, though, and Dimitri was happy to provide. His lips wandered across my neck and shoulder, kissing, nibbling, and biting again and again at the tender skin. Each little groan from him vibrated against me and made me purr. Then I felt a second hand press against my sex. The gentle thrust of Dimitri's fingers had gradually increased, but it was his other fingers that now circled my clit that really pushed me close to the edge.

Every muscle tightened as I braced for the promised pleasure right there in front of me for the taking. Just a little more. Just a little more. That mantra repeated again and again while I struggled to breathe. Oh god, I couldn't hold on. I was going to fall. My arms burned painfully as I tried to hold on a little longer. It was useless, though. I was putty in Dimitri's arms, helpless under his touch.

I cried out, not bothering to silence myself as I came undone. Twin thuds sounded on either side of us as I finally dropped the weights and clawed at Dimitri's arm to keep him pressed deep inside me as I rocked against his fingers. A second, smaller wave followed the first as Dimitri whispered loving words from behind me. I wasn't sure if they were English, Russian, or Greek because all I could process was the flurry of sensations around me. The thrust of Dimitri's fingers. His hot skin against my back. The tickle of his breath against my cheek as he spoke. All I could do was feel, and it was all so overwhelming.

Eventually, gradually, I came back to myself. The world shifted back into focus once more, and I was eager to return the favor. However, before I could reach for him, Dimitri stood, picked up the forgotten dumbbells, and placed them back on the storage rack. The lingering bulge behind the fly of his pajama pants, while incredibly enticing for me, seemed to be of little concern to him. Once he had finished tidying us a moment, he handed me my shirt and slipped on his own.

"Don't you want…" I gestured to his hard-on.

He brushed off my unfinished question. "Later, I promise. I'm pretty sure if you so much as think about touching me, then I'll end up taking you against the wall so hard the entire shed would crumble around us."

If he was trying to dissuade me, saying dirty things like that wasn't helping any. His words were incredibly tempting, but I shook off the lingering post-orgasmic bliss before I begged him to prove his promise. I offered him a dramatic sigh, heavily laced with faux-annoyance. "Well, I guess we can't have that. It would be a shame to destroy all this hard work."

He smirked and then offered me his hand. "Come on. I'm pretty sure you woke up the entire neighborhood, so Mama's probably up and starting on breakfast. Let's go grab some showers and get ready for our adventure later."

It didn't surprise me that we were able to hike through my usual running trail at a pretty decent pace. It was a bit of a disappointing surprise to learn that the additional section wasn't nearly as long or challenging as we had both been hoping for. After a short, steep rock-filled area, the hiking trail leveled off pretty quickly, and it was less than an hour before we reached the summit. Admittedly, the view was spectacular, but I wasn't sure if it was much different than the ones I treasured on my runs. It certainly wasn't worth the extra climbing.

Unable to find another reason to waste the next couple of hours on the peak, we were about ready to pack it in and call it a day. As much as I selfishly wanted to keep Dimitri to myself for a little longer, he'd probably appreciate spending a couple of extra hours with the kids. Perhaps we could set out a blanket in the back garden and share the picnic we had packed with them. The littles would love that.

However, as we started our journey back down, Dimitri noticed a small, nearly hidden path off near the treeline. I wasn't sure if it was some sort of official hiking trail, but if it was, it had been long abandoned. That didn't stop us, though. Every so often, we'd have to push back some overgrown vegetation or a fallen branch, but curiosity and the sudden sense of adventure kept us moving forward through the thick trees.

I was grateful for any bit of shade I could manage right now. One of the best perks of ditching the nocturnal schedule was being able to live my life in the sunshine. The downside? I had to deal with the heat. Now that we were slowly approaching midday, the temps were starting to spike. The weather had been warm all week, pleasantly so for the most part, but today it looked like we were going to have one of the hottest days of the summer so far. Even in my lightweight tank and shorts, I felt like I was sweating through my clothing. The jacket I had started with earlier this morning was now tied around my waist and had been for a while. I wasn't sure how Dimitri was managing in full hiking pants and a longer shirt. It seemed like the only concession he had made to the heat was scrunching the sleeves up to his elbows. I swear, nothing fazed the man.

While we tried to stay side by side on the rough trail as much as possible, there were areas like the section we were on now that narrowed to the point of forcing one of us ahead of the other. More often than not, Dimitri urged me ahead of him with some 'ladies first' nonsense that I was pretty sure was just an excuse to check out my ass as we walked. When I tried to call him out on it, all he did was shrug and give me a little smirk that convinced me that I wasn't too off the mark.

I checked the time, knowing all too well that minutes could quickly turn to hours when it was just the two of us. Just as I was about to suggest turning back and returning to the main trail, where they had picnic tables set up for public use, I heard the sound of rushing water. A creek? But it seemed stronger than that. A river, then? But as far as I knew, the only river in the area was the Ob, and that was down in the valley. The brush still hid the source of the sound, but we were walking straight toward it. With each step, it grew louder until the dense trees began to thin and revealed something so unreal I thought I might've been dreaming.

"Is everything okay–" Dimitri paused beside me, suddenly struck by the same view that had left me speechless. "Oh, wow."

It was hard to mask the tone of wonder as I looked around at the pure beauty in front of me. "Did you know about this place?"

"No. I had no idea it was here."

The clearing looked like something out of a fairy tale. A forested oasis in so many shades of green that I didn't have names for all of them. Even the lake that sat in the middle of it all was a clear, greenish-blue that practically begged for us to dip our toes in. On the far side, a dark wall of rock rose up, scattered with dozens of thin, white, ribbon-like waterfalls that poured from somewhere beyond where we could see. It seemed like even the ground beneath our feet was enchanted, carpeted in grass and moss with little white, pink, and purple flowers poking through like stars in the night sky.

Baia, in general, wasn't a noisy place, but here, no more than a two-hour hike from where I called home, the only sound was that of the birds and falling water. It was a place where you could totally forget the world. Which meant it was perfect.

Neither of us said anything as we set our packs aside, mutually deciding that this was the place we'd be stopping for lunch without needing to confer with the other. As Dimitri dug through his pack for something, I stepped closer to the pond. No matter how magical this place seemed, I was pretty sure there weren't any monsters or mermaids hiding underneath its surface. Still, just to be safe, I picked up a small, flat rock and flicked it across the lake, watching it hop and skip across the surface a few times before finally sinking into the deep with nothing but ripples left behind. When the ripples eventually faded into the smooth glass-like stillness again, I kneeled next to the water line and dipped my fingers in. It was cool, but that was an almost pleasant contrast to the heavy heat around us.

Without thinking too much about what I was doing, I kicked off my shoes and pulled my tank off. I was halfway to shimmying out of my shorts when Dimitri noticed.

"What are you doing?" He asked with obvious amusement in his voice.

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm going swimming." I was now only in my underwear and was debating whether or not to keep them on. The last thing I wanted to do was make the hike back in damp underthings, so I took them off as well before wading in. The sudden chill made me shudder, and when I was finally far enough to cover my chest, I plunged my whole head underneath.

When I emerged, I saw that Dimitri had moved closer to the shore, arms crossed across his chest as if he was about to scold me for doing something so ridiculous. There was a small smile ghosting across his lips, though, and between that and the playful glint in his eyes, I knew that his 'disapproval' was more for show than anything else. "It has to be freezing in there. You're going to catch a cold or something."

"It's not that cold, see?" I moved my arm in a wide arch across the surface of the lake, creating a fan of water that sprayed toward him. He jumped back, but he still wasn't quick enough to totally get out of the way. Several dark splotches of water were scattered across his shirt as he glared at me for a moment. I tried to hold back my grin, but I knew I had failed miserably. "I told you it wasn't that cold."

A second later, I was shrieking and scrambling into deeper water as Dimitri stripped down and chased me. It shouldn't have surprised me, but Dimitri was as adept at swimming as he was with almost everything else and caught up to me quickly despite my kicking and splashing. The moment I felt his arms come around me, I was under the water again. I struggled to the surface and sputtered a bit through my laughter, but any desire to run away from my captor was gone the moment I felt his body pressed against mine.

We played like children for a long while, laughing as we threw water at each other or tried to dunk one another. Curious, I eventually swam towards the curtain of water on the far side of the shore. Where the center of the lake had been impossibly deep, the water varied over here. There were a few spots where Dimitri could easily go under the water without touching the bottom and other places where the water was so shallow it hardly came up to my ankles. There was a sweet spot, though, that let me stand on the ground but still have just over half of my body submerged.

I let the waterfall wash over me. First, just over my arm as I cupped my hand and tried to catch as many drops as I could before my palms overflowed. Then allowing it to pour over my back until I got used to the heavy weight of the cascade. Finally, I stepped into the rain-like spray as if it was some sort of cleansing shower, allowing the stream to flow over my entire body, working its way through the strands of my hair and spilling across every inch of my skin. I could feel Dimitri's stare on me, the sensation almost as physical as the water itself. With my eyes closed, I couldn't tell exactly where he was, but I could sense that he was nearby, so I didn't startle as I felt warm hands on my hips. His palms glided up my curves, fighting the torrent across my stomach and waist until he had my breast cupped in his hands and his face tucked into the hollow between my neck and shoulder. Even through the water, I could feel his kiss. I leaned back into him and moaned as I felt the distinct pressure of him on my lower back.

"You're so beautiful, Roza," he whispered just over the rushing sound of the falls. "I could watch you for hours."

I wrapped one arm back around his neck and tangled my fingers in his wet hair. "Just watch?"

"No," he admitted after a moment. "You're too tempting not to touch."

At that, he twisted me around, and his lips crashed hard and insistent against mine. The cascade blinded me, so all I could do was feel him as we came together. Had we been in public, our actions would have been obscene. Here though, in the quiet haven that must have rivaled Eden in its beauty, it felt right to be with him like this. It felt right to be kissing him naked under a waterfall.

We never went beyond kissing and touching, but even that felt just as intimate as almost anything else we had done during Dimitri's trip here. I wasn't sure how long we stayed under the water, but it was the sound of my stomach that eventually pulled us back to shore and the picnic that Dimitri had packed for us.

I didn't bother dressing as I laid out on the picnic blanket, fully content to let the warm summer sun dry me while I sipped on some chilled wine that Dimitri had brought in the cooler. Like so many other things I had left in America, legal drinking at eighteen wasn't a problem anymore. I had partaken in plenty of beer, wine, and liquor right alongside Dimitri and his family without anyone ever saying a word. It almost made me laugh how Dimitri had refused me even a single sip of alcohol on my last day back in Spokane, but now, only a few months later, he didn't care one bit. In fact, as I drained the last of my first glass, he was quick to offer another.

"Just one more," I said, knowing that I needed to stay hydrated—with water—for our eventual hike back into civilization. Anything more than a few drinks would only make matters worse for me in the long run.

Dimitri had put his boxers back on but was otherwise just as naked as I was as he dished up two plates of herby kasha salad as well as a bit of the cold, roasted chicken from dinner last night. He lounged back against a rock as I settled on my stomach, both enjoying our lunch with easy conversation. The reality of tomorrow didn't touch us here, so we kept our topics to strange hypotheticals, such as where we would live if we could live anywhere in the world together. Neither of us had ever sunk our toes into a warm sandy beach, so we made abstract plans to visit somewhere like Hawaii, Fiji, or another tropical paradise one day. I also learned between bites of fresh strawberries from his mother's garden that he'd rather be a fish than a bird, but only if he could be a fish on some colorful reef. Me? I'd rather fly and travel to my heart's content.

Eventually, though, the sun had gone from high above us to casting rays of light and shadow between the trees. There was still plenty of daylight out, but it was time to head home so Dimitri could spend one more evening with his family before leaving early in the morning.

"We'll come back," he promised as we finished getting dressed and packed, picking any sign that we had been here in the first place.

The hike and drive back to the house were quiet but pleasant, only broken by the odd moment when I realized that I couldn't find any sign of the waterfalls or lake on any map of the area, even with the satellite images.

"It's almost like it wasn't even real," I noted, zooming in and out around the area I knew it should be. Dimitri shrugged off the suggestion, stating that it would just remain ours then.

The beat of my heart was like a ticking clock throughout the rest of the day. I tried to enjoy every second, even though I knew that they all just added up to the moment Dimitri would leave. While we were all smiling, there was a heaviness in the air. It seemed like everyone was trying to make the most of the evening in their own way. Olena must have whipped up a dozen different dishes as if the food would entice him to stay another day or two (which, admittedly, would have probably worked with me). His sisters recounted good memories from their childhood, unfortunately admitting that there was no actual evidence of Dimitri being dressed up time and time again as a little kid so he could be fake married to all of Karo's friends. Even Zoya, who was too young to know what was going on, made sure to stick around her uncle.

It was late into the evening when we all eventually accepted that the night would have to end. Dimitri regretfully passed a sleeping Katya back to Sonya, but not before closing his eyes for a second and kissing the baby's forehead. It was almost as if he was trying to memorize the moment. He did the same with the other two littles. Poor Paul had woken as Dimitri tried to help him to bed, and it was almost heartbreaking as a half-asleep Paul begged him to stay a little longer.

"Don't go, Uncle Dimitri." Big crocodile tears formed at the corner of his eyes, but he sleepily rubbed them away before they could fall. "I'll miss you too much if you go."

Dimitri pulled him into a tight hug, sighing and looking like he wished he could say yes to his nephew before pulling back and clapping him on the shoulders. He leveled him a serious look. "I promise I'll come back soon. Until then, though, I want you to be kind to your sister and cousin. Take care of them, your Mama, and everyone else, okay? Be strong and brave. I am very proud of you, and if you ever miss me too much, just let Aunt Roza know, and she'll help you call me, okay?"

Tears threatened everyone as Dimitri moved one by one around the house, hugging each of his sisters. Karo had volunteered to wake up before the crack of dawn to drive him the two-hour trip to the airport. Karo had insisted that she had things she had to do up in the city anyways, but I suspected she would have offered either way.

When he said goodbye to Yeva, she patted him on the cheek with a "Приятного путешествияи. Не забывайте тех, кто любит вас больше всего."

He nodded. "Прощайте" The word sounded heavy as if the sentiment was less of a simple 'goodbye' and more like a 'farewell.' Dimitri had once admitted that it would take more than old age to kill Yeva—something I wholeheartedly agreed with—but time came for us all, eventually.

When the clever old bat picked up on his concern, she pinched his cheeks and muttered something quickly. I didn't catch all of it, but I'm pretty sure it was along the lines of 'I'll be fine, you foolish boy.'

"Mama," Dimitri gently chided when he saw his mother's silent tears. Olena was valiantly trying to hold a smile but caved when her one and only son embraced her. "Please don't cry."

That only made Olena's tears come faster as she replied, "Come back soon, Mitya."

"I will. I swear." He held her a second longer before she pulled away and gestured to me, urging him towards the last person he had to say goodbye to.

Dimitri reached out silently, stealing my hand in his and guiding us upstairs so we could say our goodbye in private.

He offered me the bathroom first, insisting that he had a few last things to gather before bed. By the time he took care of his nightly routine, I was already lying in the bed, face down into the pillow.

I counted to ten, then twenty, as I tried to will myself to breathe and hold back the tears that wanted to fall. I planned to be strong tonight, but watching Dimitri say goodbye earlier had torn at my best intentions. I wanted to put on a happy face for him. I wanted to smile and tell him that everything was fine. We'd be okay. I'd be okay. But truthfully, right now, t didn't feel like anything was okay. Everything…hurt.

The bed dipped a little beside me, and I squeezed my eyes shut against the barrage of sadness that was still trying to push through. Dimitri's gentle touch nearly pushed me over the edge.

One, two, three, four…

"Why won't you look at me?" He asked, breaking the silence and smoothing my hair back in an almost meditative way.

I sniffled, scrunching my face up and pressing into the pillow for a moment before deciding just to tell him the truth. "Because I'm crying. I know I shouldn't, but…"

"It's okay, Roza. You don't have to apologize." I felt the bed shift a little as he slipped under the covers and pressed closer to me. "I'm upset, too. Trust me, if I could stay here with you, then I would."

A part of me wanted to suggest that he could stay. Technically speaking, he didn't have to go back to Court. All he would have to do is give up his entire life for me. No big deal.

Obviously, I couldn't ask that of him, though. Even I wasn't that selfish.

Which is why I didn't want to make this any harder on him. I didn't want him to see me fall apart. I didn't want to give him any reason to feel worse about what our reality meant. Dimitri already knew.

He pressed closer, fingers wandering over my curves and valleys in a lazy, familiar way. His skin felt hot against mine, and I relished in the comforting warmth. I had stripped down before sliding into bed, not even bothering to pretend that our last night would be spent anywhere other than in one another's arms, and it seemed like he had the same idea.

He tried to entice me towards him with little touches and kisses, but for some reason, I felt stuck. My body refused to find shelter in his embrace. When he brushed my hair to the side and pressed his lips to the back of my neck, I finally broke. The tears that I had struggled to hold at bay finally broke through in gentle sobs.

"Shh, Roza. It'll be okay, I promise." In one swift motion, he shifted until his body covered mine, blanketing me with his strength while mine crumbled. "I love you. No matter the distance, no matter the situation, that will never change. I will always love you."

I hazarded a glance over my shoulder and offered him a bittersweet smile. "Я тоже тебя люблю."

His eyes softened for a moment at my promise, only to heat a second later. He shifted my leg a little, making room for him as I felt his body line up with mine. The now familiar pressure at my sex made me gasp a little as he asked, "Let me show you?"

I nodded, and a heartbeat later, my tear-born whimpers were replaced with ones tinged by pleasure. I wasn't sure I'd ever truly get used to the fullness I felt whenever Dimitri pressed into me. I wouldn't say I was empty without him, but whenever we came together like this? It was glorious.

It was like how I felt stronger with him beside me. We had trained better side by side. We had fought better side by side. Worked better side by side. I felt like I could take on the world because I knew someone had my back. It wasn't an 'other half' situation because Dimitri and I were both complete people in our own right. Together though? Together we were so much more.

Dimitri had stilled after that first thrust, allowing us both a moment to enjoy the pure physical connection. I knew the stillness was testing him, though. His heavy pants against my nape made that clear. He wanted to move and bury himself inside again and again. He wanted to take control and bring us to the brink of that high we could only manage together. And, dear god, I wanted that too.

"Охуеть," He said, the curse washing against my cheek and making me shiver. "How the hell are you always so tight? You feel…" One of his hands found mine beside the pillow, and he laced our fingers together as he gave a shallow thrust. "...you feel like perfection."

I gripped his hand harder, the action serving as a reflection of how I tried to tighten against him everywhere else. He let out a deep groan, a wordless begging for permission to let go. Looking over my shoulder, I found his lips and kissed him in a frantic, messy way that spoke of need and desperation. "Fuck me," I whispered against his lips.

I was expecting my words to open a floodgate, releasing a torrent of movement that would all but drown me. I expected hard, almost punishing jolts. That's how it usually was between us. One spark and we became an all-consuming wildfire that didn't care about anything other than the heat burning between us. It suited us and what we had together.

Instead, his thrusts slowly rolled into me like waves. Each one was slow and deep, over and over again, until it created a rising tide of pleasure. He wasn't fucking me; he was making love to me in a way that almost seemed more intense than what I had initially asked of him. I moaned as he buried himself so fully inside me I had to wonder if he could physically get any closer. I could feel every single inch of him, and yet I still wanted more.

As careful and gentle as this moment seemed, there was a part of it that was still punishing. Dimitri was still blanketing me with his body, but besides his hand, there was very little of him that I could touch. It left me at his mercy because matter how much I tried, he always was just a little out of my reach. I had to satisfy myself by just gripping the sheet and succumbing to his whims as I pleaded in little moans and whimpers.

"Tell me, Roza." A couple of sharp thrusts made me gasp and his voice deepened into a low growl. "Tell me your body is mine. Tell me your heart is mine and mine alone."

I nodded into the pillow, stifling the pleasure-filled cries that were trying to escape. In one quick motion, Dimitri flipped me and pinned me underneath him. Everything stopped for a moment as I stilled under his gaze. There was no other way to describe it but heavy. It made it hard to breathe, impossible to move. It was like a physical weight on me.

"No, Roza." His words weren't one of chastisement. They weren't a demand but a plea. "I need to hear you say it. I need to hear you say that you are mine. I need to know that no matter the distance or situation, I get to keep you. I need to know you're mine because all that is mine to give already belongs to you. You are my everything, and I'd do damn near anything to make you happy. If you asked for it, I'd happily give my life just to see you smile and hear you say that you love me. So please, Roza. Please. Tell me that you are mine because I am wholeheartedly yours."

I reached up, grateful to finally be able to touch him properly, and ran my fingers through his hair. "I'm yours, Dimitri. You know I am."

He smiled, a brief look of relief flickering in his eyes as if he was momentarily worried I would say anything else. Maybe I should have been offended that Dimitri would doubt me, but I felt a small hint of sadness instead. What could he have lost in his life that would make him question that I would rather be anything other than his, even for one moment?

He tilted his cheek into my hand for a brief moment before turning and kissing the palm. The brush of his well-trimmed beard tickled, and I had to hold back a little laugh. Even muted, my laughter drew a smile from him. His lips trailed small pecks down my wrist and forearm as I reached for him again and pulled him towards me. The soft, lazy kiss and the slow thrusts that accompanied it lingered as if we had all the time in the world to simply enjoy one another. No countdown, no impending goodbye, just this moment here and now.

It couldn't last forever, though. Eventually, the gentle waves of our lovemaking turned into rapids. Lips clashed with teeth, little nips intermingled with kisses, and the desperate heat that we had been holding at bay finally made itself known.

"Oh, god!" I cried out, unable to stay quiet, as Dimitri hitched my leg up higher. The new position had each thrust brushing against some spot inside me that left me gasping for air. I really hoped the others were sound asleep because, between my cries and the rhythmic thump of the headboard against the wall, there was a pretty good chance that we were loud enough to make things awkward at the breakfast table. At least it wasn't a shared wall.

We tried to make the moment last, pausing and exploring different positions to stave off our final high whenever we crept too close to the edge. I had given into several orgasms through the night, much to Dimitri's cocky and self-satisfied amusement, but his self-control held frustratingly firm. Even my mouth wasn't enough to shatter him. But eventually, even he couldn't hold out any longer.

Laid out underneath me as I rode him, with his head thrown back as he chanted my name and rubbed frantic circles over my clit, he finally snapped and pulled me down with him. He grabbed my hips, pulling me tight against him as he thrusted upwards and filled me. I could feel him pulse inside me, echoing the way my body spasmed around him in near-desperation. It was almost more than I could bear. The culmination of everything finally released in a way that left me both satisfied in my pleasure and casting a longing shadow now that the moment was over and reality was beginning to surround us again.

Dimitri held me as he rolled us to our sides and gave me one final deep kiss before letting me go with a sigh. Silence fell between us as we regained our breathing, and our heartbeats slowed back to a relaxed rhythm that tried to lure us to sleep. I wasn't ready to close my eyes quite yet, though.

"One day, Roza," he whispered, hand still gently dancing across my skin. "One day, there will be no more goodbyes between us. Only good mornings and good nights, but no more goodbyes. I swear."

Tears danced with his promise. I knew that day was far, far off on the horizon, but I could almost imagine it. I had seen glimpses of it all the last week or so. Loving looks and open embraces without care of who was watching. Doing dishes together and laughing as I flicked bubbles at him. Playful moments, quiet moments, happy moments that would have been impossible in the life I had once expected for myself. Things were still hard. Incredibly hard sometimes. But I had hope now. I believed Dimitri. I wasn't sure how or when, but I knew that he was right. One day we wouldn't have to count the days to when he came or went. One day we'd be together, sharing a life that, right now, we could only imagine.

Visions of the future mingled with Dimitri's loving smile as my eyes grew heavy. "Don't leave…" a yawn interrupted my quiet request. "Don't leave without telling me goodbye."

He kissed my forehead one last time. "I promise."

"Roza." Someone brushed my hair back as they quietly called me out of my dreams. I cracked open a tiny bit as I finally recognized Dimitri's voice. He knelt beside the bed, only a breath away from me. His face was shaved clean now, and the sight was enough to remind me of what was happening. Quickly distracting me from the pain, he cupped my cheek in his hand and brushed a thumb across my skin. The pure regret in his eyes tugged at my heart. "I have to go, Roza."

I shoved down the part of me that wanted to scream 'no' and beg him to stay, but I held strong. I knew I wasn't fooling him, but at least I wasn't making things more difficult for us. I tried to sit up for a moment, but he urged me back against this pillow.

"It's early; you should go back to bed. I just wanted…" His words drifted briefly as a flash of pain in his eyes caused him to grimace slightly. He gave me a quick kiss before resting his forehead against mine. "What I really want is to crawl back into that bed, hold you in my arms, and never let you go. I need to go, though. I need to."

It was almost as if he was trying to convince himself.

"You need to go," I echoed, trying to make things a little easier for him. "I'll be okay. Plus, this isn't actually goodbye. Right? It's not like we can't talk on the phone or…" but it wasn't the same. This trip proved that. Could we survive on daily phone calls? Sure. But it would never be the same as being together like this. "You'll be back soon."

He nodded. "I'll be back soon."

A soft knock at the bedroom door drew both of our attention momentarily as Karo peeked through. Her eyes pleaded for forgiveness as she asked, "Are you ready, Dimitri?"

"Yeah," He said to her before turning back to me. He gave me a slow, tender kiss but pulled back before it could turn heated. "I love you, Roza. I promise I'll be back soon."

"I love you, too."

With that, he finally stood. His eyes were filled with regret and yearning as he lifted his duffle bag. And as he adjusted the strap on his shoulder, he gave me one last lingering look and left. I listened for several minutes before I heard the front door close and Karo's car start. As the sound of the engine faded into the distance, the tears began. With nobody left to witness, I shifted over to the other side of the bed, where the covers still held on to Dimitri's warmth and let them fall freely.

Author's Note

Special art from Hiccupped Studio is available on the Ao3 version of this story. My username on that site is also gigi256. I'm unable to upload art here so you'll have to view it there. Sorry about the delay but I hope I made up for it with an extra-long chapter with plenty of love and angst. Also, by popular request, I'll be sticking translations at the bottom of each chapter now, just to make things easier on you guys.

Question of the week: Dimitri and Rose mused about going on a tropical vacation together one day. Where would your ideal vacation be?

Thank you all for reading and I hope you have a wonderful week.

"Боже мой" = my god

"Милая" = sweetheart

"Приятного путешествияи. Не забывайте тех, кто любит вас больше всего" = Have a nice trip and. Don't forget the ones who love you the most

"Прощайте" = Farewell

"Я тоже тебя люблю" = I love you, too