"I'm sorry, can you- I don't think I got that. Can-Can you say it again for me?"
Worry pinched at the couples face before him yet Shouta could hardly focus. Hardly decipher the reason for it when he let his gaze flick away from the couple across from him as his hands squeezed at the mug between them. He knew the single floor home like the back of his hand. The mess of towels in the linen closet by the bathroom down the short hallway that led to a singular bedroom. The carpet was being lifted up in the corner by the window due to the few cats that wandered through the home.
He knew the wallpaper was being shredded along the window with claw marks from said cats jumping up to the small window. The kitchen was neatly, meticulously scrubbed each morning with items in their rightful places in the small space. The cluttered living room with its games, books, and fandom merchandise purchased over the years whether in support of someone or in a game one liked. A messy yet neat area that he had memorized for years given the countless times he'd been over. A comforting space.
Years spent sitting in this very living room in the recliner while the carpet was dealt with spill after spill. Stain from the red wine spilled on it twice. Incidents that had led to the original carpet being ripped up then replaced begrudgingly by Hizashi. He knew the cabinet holding the coffee and mugs squeaked like no other. Knew the leather couch folded out into a pull-out bed for guests to sleep on. He knew the master bedroom was a wide area with a small, attached bathroom with the barest necessities within.
The smaller bathroom holding a shower and bathtub combination, a sink with a small counter, and a toilet. The mirror that held the medicines and other self-care items within. The bedroom with its dresser and flat screen on it at the foot of the king-sized bed and the small closet in the room. The wild array of colors from green to blue within the home that had always been given flattering accent colors. A bright home that didn't need sound to scream with that lived in feeling. A space where anyone could breathe out.
He'd been over to Hizashi and Oboro's home many, many times in his life from the time they found the small house. It had been an absolute mess that Oboro had voiced his worries about not being worth it. A dump heap that the blonde had insisted they could flip into their space. And they had; the blonde had gutted then helped pay for workers to renovate the home to get it to the pristine state it was in. Personal touches, personal recommendations between the both and input from others made it what it was.
He'd spent nights in the recliner or on the pull-out bed after late nights drinking with the two men. With Nemuri and Tenya if they managed to bring him along. He'd spent afternoons off of work in a gaming tournament with the dark-haired woman and the couple. He'd found himself at their front door countless times after those nights out at the tail end of a date or when his date from his apps never showed up. He'd come over if he was having a rough night where sleep simply wasn't possible for him.
And without fail, each time he was welcomed with open arms by the couple who would always fuss over him until he was far too exhausted to keep his head up. Until he was melting into the couch with the fussing worry and nagging washing over him only to continue the next day. All things that left him warm in the moment. Left him feeling cared for. And aching the next night when he was on his own. He was used to pining. He was used to wanting something he couldn't have. Longing for it so damn bad it hurt.
Became a physical ache that brought tears to his eyes. Kept him awake longing, wishing, pleading for the world to give him something to make it through. To give him what he wanted. To this day, he'd never figured out who it was that had lit that flame in him; Hizashi or Oboro. He had tried over and over to find the trigger for that pining. Had tried to find the source of that longing. The pinpoint where his feelings had crested past friendship to wanting something more from the blonde and blue-haired man.
He never found the reason for that trigger. What had caused him to have such feelings for the both of them when each day had blurred into the next. Another day, another hour, another minute giving him yet another reason for those silent feelings to build up in him. From the times he'd racked his mind for the cause, the reason, it had been nonexistent. As if those feelings hadn't been there one day but the next they had been. Overnight they'd seemed to have come for him until he realized how he felt.
Until he was pining for that chance to be with them. Longing. And by then it was far, far too late. By the time he became aware of his own feelings, Oboro and Hizashi had already taken his scathing advice for them to talk to one another and get it over with. They were a smitten couple who were building a world and life between them that he wasn't privy too. A relationship that only grew stronger by the time they had all graduated high school. And he was left on his own. Left to drown in the sudden realization.
The reality he was too late. That he had failed to recognize it himself leaving him to sit on the sidelines to watch the adoration, affection and love that was traded between the couple. To watch the open affection with that bitter "what ifs" threatening to choke him up. The couple, of course, couldn't have known. He never held it against them when they expressed their love so openly to one another. When they felt no need to hide away those besotted looks traded between one another when the attention was off of them.
He was left drowning in a pining that refused to abate; a pining that left him aching so viciously he couldn't breathe. He wanted it. He didn't know if desire for one man had outweighed the other, but he wanted it. Wanted to be in the know with the blonde and the blue-haired man. He wanted to be showered in that loving affection they gave to one another. How many nights had he spent awake pining so viciously for two men? How many nights did he wonder what it'd be like? To be wrapped up in an embrace by Oboro?
A squeeze tight hug that he always gave him yet to have it every day? To have Hizashi nuzzling his cheeks or shouting those declarations of love at him? The besotted looks aimed his way? How many dates had he been on that ended in him curling away from his partner by morning? Wishing it was someone else with such fervency it left a pit in his stomach that ached? Had him ill by the time the rush wore off? Hours spent wondering if Hizashi's hair truly was as silky as it looked until his fingers were itching to twist into it?
If Oboro's shoulders felt as broad as they looked until he was aching to hug the man just to feel? The desire to have hands tracing along his waist as he inhaled the sandalwood scent of Hizashi's cologne? The smoky, pine scent of Oboro's? How many nights had he stayed awake on that pull-out couch wondering if the quiet creaks meant more or if it was the house? Nights where he wished they would welcome him to the bed just to hold him? To twist his fingers into that fluffy, light blue hair to see if it felt soft as it looked?
To admire the freckles on Hizashi's cheeks and the bridge of his nose? To kiss at his face until he was giggling as he did with Oboro? To kiss at Oboro's face until it was turning red with those deep giggles of his own? How long had he struggled against that desire to merely have them? Just once? It was a pining that was made worse with each passing minute, hour, and day. Made worse throughout the years when the two had announced their engagement. It had damn near toppled him over to an awful point.
A peak where he had quite truly thought of cutting them off. It wasn't healthy for himself to be so blindly lost in his love for two men who wouldn't and couldn't consider having him. Not when they were so wrapped up in each other it was the sickening image of the healthiest love he'd ever seen. He had tried so hard to rid himself of the pining. Of his emotions. Tried once to cut the two men off to keep himself from aching a moment longer but they had refused to let him go so easily. Refused to let him detach.
And how could he tell them? How could he look them in the eye and confess he wanted to be away from them to avoid hurting them? Even if he knew, in the end, it would lead to hurt feelings all around? How did he tell them he was drowning under that best friend title each time the lines were drawn? When he saw the boundaries between a side hug for him and the way Hizashi threw himself into Oboro's arms as he was lifted off the floor? Squealing as he peppered the blue-haired man's face in kisses that returned to him?
He'd wanted an out so badly. To avoid hurting them. To avoid hurting himself. Yet in the past four years he found it the most difficult with their engagement. More gut wrenching than it had been in the beginning of this awful pit of festering feelings. Four years where he had sworn there had been flickers of something between himself, Oboro, and Hizashi. That the spark he felt was returned to him. A moment when he'd been drinking wine after returning to the house with Hizashi with the intent on helping him with his shopping.
When he'd been roped into sitting down at the table as he ranted on about God knows what only to turn to the silent blonde across from him. Finding those green eyes on him with that undistinguishable expression to them that had gotten his heart jumping in his throat. Frozen when those colorful nailed hands had reached out to drift over the backs of his fingers. Covering his hands with that light touch when Hizashi then leaned in closer, closer, closer. He'd been shell shocked by the sudden change in the atmosphere.
When he was watching lips parting slightly with the barest whisper of breath being taken as his heart thudded in his chest with the hope that this was it, it, it. Hoping, praying, wishing it to be only to have the front door opening with Oboro shouting out his greetings. Breaking whatever sudden spell over took the moment when the blonde had jerked away from him. Snapping out of it before jumping up to greet Oboro. However, that expression never left the blonde when he had glanced at him the rest of the night.
Catching his gaze without intending too only to look away quickly. Guilty. And yet it had lit a fire in him. Thrown another bit of kindling onto the longing that had him excusing himself in a tight, croaked voice to leave for the night when it became too much. The several moments when Oboro would nudge him out of the way playfully with his hip or be the first to hug him in greeting. A singular moment he could recall with such clarity being a late night when he'd had nowhere to go. Nowhere he could think of going but there.
When Oboro had opened the door to him after he'd felt wrong after the date that night had turned into a hookup. A night when that physical pleasure hadn't won over the emotional weight he'd been dealing with and the blue-haired man welcomed him in without a second thought. He'd been shoved to the bathroom with a pair of borrowed pajama's thrown at him while the blue-haired man went to make tea. When he'd shuffled out with Oboro handing him the mug then stretching an arm out towards him.
Waiting for him to tuck himself against the man's side and he couldn't deny it to himself even now that he'd been weak. Helpless against tucking himself into the warmth of that sideways hold as he tried to vent without giving specifics. Without going into why he'd been so put off by the date. When he'd rested his head on his shoulder to be hugged close only to have his head tip back and find himself in a moment like Hizashi's. Startled by the sudden change in atmosphere between the both of them in that moment.
Where he found an attentiveness to those blue eyes as they met his without so much as a flinch. Listening to him without a complain. And God knows the way Oboro had been looking at him had knocked him into that stunned state once again. Awed at the way those lashes had lowered ever so slightly with lips parting with quiet breaths being taken. How his own had seemed so loud in his own ears when Oboro's head had been dipping lower, lower, lower with that familiar hope as he'd had with Hizashi in the kitchen.
A hope that surged so painfully he felt ready to tear up. Gasping in those quiet breaths that had been so loud as he held himself still. Waiting, waiting, waiting for it only for that guilt to surge into him when Hizashi had shuffled out with that worried expression. Jerking away from the blue-haired man who hadn't skipped a beat in explaining. Neglecting that atmosphere. That damn mood between them yet he'd insisted in that choked tone he wanted to lay down. After these small moments he'd isolated himself.
He'd felt sick from the guilt over hoping it meant something. Hoping it meant he was getting what he wanted. He felt physically ill from that guilt. He'd never been a crier but God knows that dry heaving from that physical nausea had tears clinging to his lashes. Disgusted for wanting someone, something, he couldn't have. Dirty for needing two people so much he'd do anything to have them even if he knew it was out of his reach. Far too late. God knows he'd give anything to go back and change it all.
Anything to keep from feeling guilty each time he spent a moment alone with either of them. Too scared of spending a moment alone with Oboro and Hizashi that the attraction would win out. That he would slip up. That he had read everything wrong and ruin their relationship. Ruin his own friendship with him. It was another fear that added to his guilt to leave him sick at the thought. He couldn't live with himself if he did something that reckless. If he did something so awful and he lost one or both of them as a result.
It was too much to be alone with them and worry about that attraction. That spark he swore had been returned in those small moments yet he had tried to forsake it. Tried to write it off as his pining, his longing, insisting something was there when it could be in his head. Made up to save himself from being heartbroken. Even if he'd much rather be confronted and have the couple bluntly break it to him that it wouldn't happen. That it couldn't happen. He'd much rather that than the hopeless longing.
The aimless pining that left him wanting more of those quiet moments one-on-one with both men if it meant satisfying that pining no matter how small. He'd much rather lose the longing that had his heart jumping in his throat with hope. He wanted them to tell him to leave it alone. To confront was in front of them all that had gone unsaid for fifteen years now. And yet in the last six months, he'd sworn with or without a moment alone that spark had been there. The return of that attentiveness given to him.
Alert of how they interacted with one another. Not quite flirting but he couldn't describe that awkward atmosphere that left him feeling worse when he indulged in it. A year ago he'd been suspicious with those brief flickers between them but the last six months seemed to be hitting him hard. So hard it left him worried when he stepped over the threshold of their home for the fear something would happen that would be flirtatious. Taken the wrong way by Oboro or Hizashi, depending on the initiator and the reactor.
And then, today, he'd received a text to come over that afternoon. A text he'd been waiting for since Nemuri had asked him if he knew of anything wrong between Oboro and Hizashi. When she'd told him they had both seemed set on edge lately. Tense. As if they had been fighting or were caught up in their own affairs that were shoving a wedge between them. The text asking him to come over. No emojis. No elaboration. A simple request for him to come over with the offer of coffee for him and the dreaded words.
That they needed "to talk" about something. Again, no elaboration nor a single emoji in the typical way Hizashi used them. Oh, it had been sickening the way his stomach had dropped at the sight of those texts. A day of smoking before hopping onto a game with Tenya had been yanked out from beneath him. The afternoon of a planned dinner party at Nemuri's that was canceled for the two men to talk to him. It had him physically ill when he had been refused an elaboration and was instead given time to come over.
It had his hands shaking. His knees were threatening to fall out from beneath him when he'd been pacing his apartment. Worrying, worrying, worrying about what he was heading into. If they were finally putting their foot down after the countless moments between them in the past four years that had been steadily building were coming to their crescendo. If he was finally being confronted with the truth. With walls and boundaries being established firmly with him that would have very reasonable consequences.
To have threat of being cut off if he dared cross them dangling over him. He'd tried so unbelievably hard to bury the feelings when they'd made themselves clear in their final year of high school after that second wondering if they were genuine. When they'd continued to flourish despite the sight of Oboro and Hizashi's healthy relationship. How happily and sickeningly in love they were with each other. And yet the feelings refused to wither but rather grew so entangled he couldn't tell who he had stronger feelings for.
Who he desired, pined, and longed for more. Oboro or Hizashi. But they years had shown to him that he wanted them both. Loved them both equally. That he'd give anything to have them just once even if it was to have a one night stand. A fling for them to experiment and for him to get his curiosities out of his system about them. He'd be happy. Content. He swore it even if he knew the truth that he'd never be with one time. He'd never be satisfied. And yet that text message brought all that fear and guilt.
That fear they knew his feelings and needed it to stop. That he needed to stop hoping for something unachievable. Unreachable for himself. Something not meant for him. And he knew he'd agree because he couldn't lose Hizashi and Oboro like this. But he had been terrified of showing up at their home. He wasn't a man who could be rattled so easily. Wasn't swayed by those intensity driven emotions. He didn't give in easily to the forceful weight of his nervousness or of his anxiety nor did he let it control his reactions.
For hours beforehand he had been going over and over the outcomes of what this meeting would be with the couple. He expected something completely different than what was unraveling as he let his gaze flick between the blue-haired man and the blonde. Said blonde was picking at his colorful nails, the spots of color blooming over his freckled cheeks was absolutely lovely. His lazy bun was falling out slowly but steadily with thicker locks spilling down to his shoulders. Messily thrown together it seemed.
His red-framed glasses slipping down his nose slightly revealed the darker smattering of freckles along the bridge of his nose that always begged for kisses. The deep blue of his cardigan had his softly tanned skin glowing in contrast; it had an equally stunning effect on his hair and eyes making them pop against the deep blue. While Hizashi had initially looked tired, frazzle when he walked in, the blonde seemed keyed up now. Far more alert to the conversation. Even Oboro seemed just as attentive as the blonde.
Worried as he fidgeted in his spot throughout the conversation Hizashi was trying to navigate them through. His cheeks holding soft spots of color that blended into the bronze of his coloring. Fingers twisting into the loose fabric of his pants as bonze skin glowed against the gold coloring of his shirt today. Blue locks styled up into that familiar ponytail since he had let the locks grow out. However, on both men, there was a light stubble littering the lower half of their faces that was more evident on Oboro than Hizashi.
Light blue hair dusting on his upper lip, cheeks and jaw around the goatee of his. Subtle bags beneath blue and green eyes respectively. The blue-haired man's lower lip was chapped too all hell telling him all he needed to know when walking in That Oboro was picking at it. The blue-haired man always ripped and picked his lip apart when he was nervous about something. Even the way he was twisting his fingers into the fabric of his pants or the way he held onto Hizashi's hand between them on and off spoke volumes.
The blue-haired man was always an unbelievably confident person. Bold. Just like Hizashi which merely proved that sometimes two positives attracted one another. Two similar personalities drawn together given both men were loud, bold men. But today said men seemed seconds away from falling apart on him. It had nearly sent him into hysteric laughter at first glance when taking his own ragged appearance. This "tension" between the couple had been a weeklong affair. A week of radio silence to their group of friends.
A week of worry, stress, and absolutely ill at the thought of what this conversation would bring him. However, in all his imaginings of threats to cut him off for his blatant crush on both men. That he would be given ultimatums, boundaries, and a strict talking too by Hizashi. It was to be expected, wasn't it? For years he'd pined after both men. For years he'd drowned under his emotions, and he was breaking. His resolve was shaking slightly, and he was trying, trying, trying, to choke it down again but it was harder than normal
Especially when he'd been seeing those flickers more commonly. The spark that left him eager, hopeful, and disappointed when it was gone the next day. It was more than desire, more than arousal, more than attraction. He loves them. Loves them with an intensity that kept him awake at night wondering why it came so late. Why couldn't he have noticed those feelings earlier? Said something earlier to save himself years of this pining? To notice that he wanted them earlier? Loved them with such a ferocious intensity?
It only took six months of that strange spark to bring this all to the head he knew it would come too. Clear signs of attraction that, at first, would be a start and stop. In the moment scenarios that, just like every other time, left him feeling wrong. Disgusting to even imagine coming between such a strong relationship as that. To want them when they clearly wanted the other. But that conversation he found himself was changing the view that this was going to be unachievable. Had flipped his doubt for disbelief.
He clung to the lukewarm mug between his trembling hands as he tried to wrap his mind around what was happening. The facts, the confession given to him. The bold statement that had flown out of Hizashi the second he'd had a coffee in his hands and was sitting on the couch next to the recliner both men sat in. It was hard to piece it together. To connect the dots of what the blonde had said without feeling as if a joke was being played. A cruel joke that would make or break his relationship with both men.
A test that he would pass or fail depending on his answer. His reaction. A cruel joke that had him treading tentatively with that fear in mind when the blonde shifted in Oboro's lap as he fussed with his fingernails. Deep blue paint being scraped off of as flakes drifted to his lap. Followed quickly with red after he scraped that nail clean, it seemed. Oboro's lip fared no better as the man picked and chewed on it slightly with brows squeezing tightly together as his gaze flicked between him and Hizashi. Restless.
The blonde licked his lips as fingers twisted together tightly when eyes met his. "Oboro and I have been talking a lot the past six months. A lot this past week together just to know where we stand about this, and we've considered every angle of it. If you don't want this then it's perfectly okay! I think I spoke for both of us right now when I said that we both have feelings for you, Sho. We want you and after considering everything, we would want you to be with us if-if you'd want that? If this has gone as long as Oboro says it has-"
"Then enough is enough, isn't it? It's been a long time, Sho, and we've only seen it the past six months, haven't we? The last four years." It was just as mindboggling as the first time they'd said it. His hands felt weak. He didn't- he couldn't piece it together that it was happening. The very thing he'd hoped, wished, longed, and prayed for would happen is happening and he couldn't react properly. Couldn't think when his brain was firing off different rebuttals. "We want you, Sho. Very much."
"And we both love you very, very much, Sho! I didn't think- I hate that we're so late in the game, you know? That I didn't realize how much I love you or how deep it went until recently, you know?" There was a shift when that gaze flicked from him to Oboro who gave a wary look to the blonde. And then Hizashi moved. Climbing off of Oboro's lap to shuffle over to him where he sat down next to him. So close, close, close. "Shouta, I love you. And, if you'll have me, I want you. I want to be with you."
The quiet throb of his thudding heart was loud. Too loud. His stomach dropped with such airy intensity it left him feeling nauseous from the reactions that had him falling apart. Hanging by a thread when he felt heat gathering in the back of his neck. Stinging in the tips of his ears when Oboro was moving from his place in the recliner to shuffle around the coffee table to the couch. Hesitating before sitting down to the right of him with a hand coming to rest on his knee. "And I love you too, Shouta. So much."
His mouth dropped open slightly on a wheezing rush when he looked from the blonde to the blue-haired man. The hand on his knee squeezed at him then. He couldn't- Life didn't work this way. He wasn't the boy who got the boys in the end. He wasn't the stood-up groom who got his fiancé back. This didn't happen in reality. Life wasn't some story where he got them both in the end. It couldn't be that easy. "I- Why the sudden change? Why now?"
Green and blue eyes flicked to one another before coming back to him when he noticed spots of color blooming over freckled cheeks when Hizashi picked at his nails again. "Last year. I was- God, I don't even remember what I was talking about, but Oboro asked if I had feelings for you. And I took time, but I realized that I did. I don't know how, why, or when it started but they did and Oboro told me a little later on he was attracted to you. And we've been talking it over so much like you wouldn't believe!"
"I know a year is a long time to wait to say something, Sho, but we didn't want to confuse it, you know? I didn't want me or Zashi coming to you only to find out they were only surface level if that makes sense? Nem has been joking for years you were pining no matter how many times you denied it. And while we don't know if that's true or not, the last thing either of us wanted was to hurt you. For you to think they were only surface level feelings if they could be more, you know?"
He jumped when hands covered the back of his left hand to curl fingers to his palm and fingers. Pulling them from their absent-minded twisting pluck at his pants to hold onto it when he let his gaze flick back to Hizashi when he got a squeeze. "I know we're so goddamn late to the game that it might not even be a-a possibility anymore, but we've been talking it over for six months now! Over the past week! And those feelings have only grown since that first time Oboro asked me!"
He was being blown out of water he hadn't known he'd been drowning in. Blasted into the air left flailing as he tried to find his grounding. It was an odd thing; to hear that the two men he'd been pining and longing for wee admitting to loving him. Wanting him the way that he wanted them. It would leave anyone scrambling for words. Blinking at the blonde, he licked his lips before swallowing. "Yo-You really want me? You really love me like-like that? Like you love and want each other?"
Oh, it was mortifying to hear his own breathless voice cracking like that. Wavering. It had hands tightening on his sandwiched left hand along with the blue-haired man's hand on his knee. Blonde lashes fluttered as eyes flickered over his face when that worried look pinched at the blonde's pink face. "Yes! God, yes, Shouta, we do, and I know it's really late to it all, but can you forgive us? Can you forgive it that it took us so long to see it? That it took me so long to feel it too?"
"Is there- I mean, is there a chance for it, Shouta? A chance for you to let us try at the very least?" He turned his gaze from the blonde to the blue-haired man when fingers brushed over his cheek triggering that rush of heat from the back of his neck. A mortifying blush that had him pinching his lips together when Oboro's fingers trailed along his cheek bone before coming down to his jaw. "We want you, Shouta. I want you just as much as I want Zashi. As much as he wants me. Can't you believe that?"
"I don't know if I can." Cracking. Wheezing words leaving him when he felt hands squeezing at his when the hand brushing his cheek pressed against it. A thumb slid along his cheek when he felt a hand moving to caress his forearm gently prompting him to look to Hizashi once more. "I don't know if I can believe it, but I can forgive you even if there's nothing to forgive. You didn't notice because they weren't there until recently so there's no "late" to the game. You really love me? Want me like that?"
"Fuck, yes, we do, Shouta! We took a year to just to avoid hurting you, baby, because that's the last thing that should be done to you when it wouldn't be fair!" Oh, it was a jolt of warmth at that small term of endearment. That soft croon of the word when that thumb traced the shape of his scare beneath his eye. A gentle back and forth that had his lashes shutting as he ought that urge to tip his face into it. Not yet. "If you don't want this, Shouta, then tell us, okay? We won't hold it against you if you don't want us."
"Why wouldn't I?" That warm palm pressed to his feverish cheek when he kept his eyes shut. It was easy to focus his words when he wasn't looking at them directly. When he wasn't dizzy this was truly happening; this was reality, and he was getting the one thing he'd dreamed and prayed for. Wished for so fervently it left him longing the next morning. "Why wouldn't I want you both? I came here open-mindedly to accept your wishes to make you both happy. No matter what it was because I love you both so fucking much it hurts."
"Shouta, baby, look at me?" He didn't want to. It was horribly childish but he didn't want to open his eyes to find it was some kind of hyper realistic dream. Didn't want to face the pitying looks he might get as that palm pressed firmly to his cheek. Yet at the stroke along his cheek bone and forearm in unison, he forced his lashes up to find Hizashi so close, close, close to him allowing him to inhale that faint scent of his cologne. "I'm all in. I want you and I love you just as much as Oboro. I'll take however long to prove it to you."
"I will too." Looking to the blue-haired man, his lips parted slightly with a silent tremble as the words clogged in his tight throat. Unable to be squeezed out. Spoken when he gave. He couldn't, couldn't, couldn't deny himself the affection he wanted so badly from the two men he wanted it from the most. Couldn't deny himself a second longer when he tipped his face into Oboro's palm with a shuddering breath. "I'll prove it anyway I can, Shouta. I'll do anything to prove it! A year may not be long to sit on it, but I mean it. We mean it."
He truly was helpless. Pretty, flowery words had always been a weakness to him; long before when he'd been friends with them. Before they had gotten together, he'd found his heart jumping at the subtly suggestive words of theirs when compliments were thrown his way. Flirtatious remarks that were then waved off in good fun. He was helpless against Oboro and Hizashi. Always had been, always will be. "You're really sure? Really sure? I've heard poly isn't easy for many people and I couldn't- can't live with myself if this ruins everything."
"It's not but it takes work. And I think with work that this could be the healthiest relationship if we all put forth the effort to make it work." The gentle caresses along his forearm had goosebumps raising over his skin when he took a deep breath as he nuzzled his cheek into that dry palm. Melting at the rub back it of his hand that squished it gently. His hand was being lifted up with soft lips fluttering over the back of it. "Let's ask him, Oboro, like we practiced? Give him the chance to reject it?"
"Shouta, we're willing to put the effort into making this work if you'd meet us halfway? If you're willing to humor us after all this time?" His breath shuddered out of him when the blonde squeezed at his hand and forearm gently. No, it truly couldn't be so effortless. There was a part of him insisting he was in a stress dream. That he had succumbed to the exhaustion at some point in the night and would wake any second before their meeting time. "Shouta, will you please go out with me? Will you be my boyfriend?"
A wheeze had hands giving him those gentle squeezes. The thumb on his cheek stroked over his cheekbone as the heat burned uncomfortably with that blush. He didn't- This couldn't work. It couldn't. There was no way he would; not with how high strung he felt. What if he got jealous? Upset? What if it crashed and burned before he could be happy with them? If he was too selfish? "I-I can't. I What if I'm too jealous? Selfish? You can't let me ruin this!"
"But what if it doesn't ruin it, Sho?" Again, his gaze flickered to the blonde when he got another caress over his forearm in that comforting rub when he got a soft smile from the blonde. Warm. So, so sweet. "Shouta, I would love nothing more than to have you with us! Would you like to go out with me too? Be my boyfriend too? Be our boyfriend? We want you, baby, and we can go look into therapy with you included! We've been seeing someone who specializes in poly relationships for a while!"
"And we can bring you in as the third partner if need be or someone interested!" He was melting, melting, melting. His old resolve was shaking. Crumbling under his feet with each word leaving the men pressing against his sides. From knee to shoulder with their warmth as hands held onto him with that tenderness to rob him of breath. "Shouta, sweetheart, we'll do this the right way. We don't want to bring you in for just sex or a fling. We want a relationship with you."
"Whatever makes you comfortable, baby! If you want to leave now and think about it, then that's okay! This is a lot to dump on you in one afternoon and if you need time to think then we'll gladly give it to you! Whatever is best for you, Shouta, and makes you the most comfortable going forward!" There was another squeeze of hands when he swallowed against that strange thickness gathering in his throat. "We love you, Shouta, no matter how fresh it is romantically. We've always loved you."
Ah, why did it tug at his heart like that? Why did it have him choking up with that mortifying sting in his eyes? Why was this tearing him apart so easily? That screaming voice insisting it was a dream, a made-up stress-induced scenario, was quieting. Just enough for him to process. To think about if this was real. A trembling breath was taken when he blinked, forcing away that sting with another swallow. "Ar-Are you really sure? Is a year long enough to know? You're absolutely sure of this?"
Husky. Oh, he hated how husky his voice sounded as it broke when free arms were wrapping around him tightly to hold him tight, tight, tight. Hizashi's arm around his chest as his hold on his forearm was abandoned. Oboro's arm around his back. "Maybe it is, or it isn't, but I'm not letting you wait anymore, baby! You deserve to know where we're out but six months to talk about it? See a therapist about it? Shouta, we're ready for you if you're ready for us. Two years really if you round up!"
"Zashi, you can't ask the poor man to round up right now!" A bark of laughter left him then, yet it sounded strangled. Awful to his own ears that had arms tightening in that squeezing hug to which the blonde giggle. A strained, manic sound when he felt the hand in his tightening. "But shitty attempt to lighten the mood or not, it's true. We're coming up on two years and far too many for you, but we are ready for you, Shouta. Will you be our boyfriend, Shouta? Please, be with us?"
He couldn't continue to string this along with noncommittal answers. He couldn't continue holding his breath. Doubting if this was reality when it was showing him again, again, again this was real. Oboro wanted him. Hizashi wanted him. They both loved him and were laying out that confession he'd dreamed of for years. The very words he'd been convinced would never be said. And yet it was happening. And he wants nothing more than this chance. Nothing more than the opportunity to have them. "Yes!"
The hand slipped free from his with a shriek from the blonde that rang with delighted relief. The hand on his cheek pulled away then as arms were thrown around him. Curling around his shoulder with a second pair of arms curling around his waist as he was smothered into chests. Buried into an embrace that had his arms finally moving to curl around Oboro and Hizashi. Clutching them tightly to his side as lips peppered the top of his head in soft kisses. Nuzzling at him as breaths rustled his hair gently.
The scent of Oboro's pine cologne and Hizashi's sandalwood filled each breath he took in the tight space. Scents he'd always caught wafts of throughout his interactions with them, but it was strong in that small space. Had him dizzy from the contrasting scents he dragged down into his lungs with deep breath he took as their warmth soaked into him. He'd expected boundaries. He'd expected to be confronted as a horrible person. He'd expected scathing words, lines, and to never be alone with one or the other.
He'd expected to be cut off by both men for the shameless behavior shown recently with them. That is what he had expected. It would be the only rational expectation after the years up on years of pining that had begun clawing to the surface. Unwilling to be shoved down no matter how hard he tried in the past four years. Longing for the two people he'd never had. A longing so strangling it left him gasping in those early mornings when he woke by himself. When he was shuffling about his small apartment.
Left alone with only the small reminders of both men. When hearing from them yanked at his heart so viciously he felt robbed of breath. Wanting them so badly he'd do anything. Going so far as to try and fill that physical void with those one-night stands. Went the dates that flopped horribly led him to Hizashi and Oboro's front door if he was in the vicinity. He'd thought he was doing good hiding it. That he'd been good about hiding that bitter pill but he couldn't have been more wrong. Been more obvious.
Four years down the drain with both men watching him so intently as they apparently were. Aware of his feelings more acutely in the last year that, somehow, triggered the domino effect he'd prayed for someday but couldn't imagine happening. Couldn't imagine it becoming reality. Dominos that, apparently, were waiting to be tripped. It had only taken a little longer to get there but it felt impossible that the very thing he had hoped, wished, and prayed for was happening. It felt impossible this was happening.
For years he'd hoped and dreamed of a conversation just like this. Dreaming of those first few years he'd lived at his mother's apartment before he moved out. Nights spent awake longing for them. Clutching at the sentimental gifts given to him or small items that held wisps of their cologne. Wanting so badly to be given the chance to have them just once. To soothe the desire. The pining over them. To know if Hizashi looked as soft as he always looked. If the scars on Oboro's skin were as raised as they looked at first glance.
If that light, airy blue hair would twist around his fingers easily. If the blonde locks would be silky between his fingers. To have the scents of their colognes invading his senses. He wanted to know how it would feel to simply hold and curl into them. To have them hold him to give that small stab of relief to the longing. He'd wanted them for so long he could only imagine their relationships crumbling once they knew. Could only fear them dying away for no one could pine after another for so long like this.
Could love and want someone so much without resentment creeping in to kill off that love. That adoration. There wasn't a way that this could have gone on without the bitter feelings of jealousy rearing its head. But this? This was the dream he'd had since their second year of high school. When those feelings had begun to make themselves abundantly clear halfway through it. He'd never imagined in a thousand years that he would somehow luck out and get both of them like this. He had never imagined it would happen.
That they'd ever want him the same way he wanted them. But they were taking that dream and turning it into reality as his hopes were answered. His wishes for something just like this to give him mercy. Lips pressed to his hair again in soft pecks that had tingles racing down his back when he tightened his arms around them again. Earning himself soft hums from them both when arms tightened around him in response. Holding him so tightly between them the way he'd always hoped to be. The way he dreamed of.
It was so easy in the past to satisfy his longings with brief hugs upon a welcoming or a goodbye. When Hizashi pecked his cheeks. When he was given a flicker of physical affection that would give him small memories to satisfy even a bit of that longing at night. Moments that left him wanting to hold on a second longer than appropriate. They'd never been shy with longer hugs but he knew it would only come back to bite him those nights he spent curled up. Using those brief memories to satisfy that desire.
The simplistic want to be held by the very peopled he loved so dearly. So fervently. Using it for nights when he'd curl up in bed with his arms tight around his own midsection tightly. Trying to convince his tired mind that it was someone else rather than his own arms. The things he'd done to hunt down the scents of Hizashi and Oboro's colognes just to make the sensations authentic at night when he felt lonely. He'd tried so hard to find someone, anyone, to fill the longing he had in him that left him aching.
He'd tried to find something on those dates with men he texted with online. Hookups that allowed him to lose himself in one night outside of his longing. One night to be lost in a heat that let him forget about that aching. Trying to lose himself anyway he could even if it was to wake with the disappointment of finding someone different in his bed. He'd done everything he could to remain platonic in his feelings for Oboro and Hizashi. He had gone so far as to do therapy for a few years to work out his emotions.
He could never tell if it made it complex or better, but God knows it helped him. To have one person without a biased opinion to vent too had been unbelievably nice. He felt the blonde shifting then when he relaxed his arm around the blonde when he felt fingers touching his chin. Tipping his head back, lips then peppered over his face in a flurry of kisses that he ecstatically welcomed. Found himself eager to return to the blonde. Targeting those smattering of freckles over his cheeks that he'd always adored.
The darker smattering over the bridge of his nose that drove him crazy. That desire to press his lips to those freckles had been such an overwhelming desire over the years that had done little to lessen. His breaths came shakily when he targeted those freckles delightedly when fingers were coming through his hair. Tugging at the snags and knots gently before that hand was cupping the back of his neck to rub gently at the tense muscles. Shivers. It had that next inhale hitching as he kissed over that freckled face.
The warmth of his blush under his lips as giggles began spilling out of the blonde who was eagerly returning his kisses. Targeting the scar beneath his right eye with fingers pinching his chin gently when he moved to press kisses over that flushed face. Euphoric. He felt lips pressing to the top of his head. The touch of those soft lips to his hot face had his cheeks throbbing lightly from the force of the blush burning there. So frantic to return that affection finally being aimed his way. Frantic to accept it while he can.
An electric jolt of excitement speared through him when lips were trailing down his jaw softly with hitching breaths fanning over his skin. Quick. It was so warm. So, so warm between the both of them as he tightened his arm around Hizashi again in unison with Oboro. Soft kisses trailed over his jaw while he twisted his fingers into the blonde's shirt with hitching breaths. Hopeful. Wanting, wanting, wanting. Pleading this was going to give him what he wanted. That first kiss with the blonde he always fantasized about.
He'd played in his head over and over throughout the years how that kiss would go. How Hizashi's lips would feel under his own. Imagining if they'd be as soft as they looked against his own or if they'd be warm like he hoped they'd be. Soft kisses feathered over his jaw came back up towards his cheek with lips slowing gradually to lose that frantic speed. Pressing to the corner of his mouth with a firm kiss had his breaths hitching in at that rush of excitement. Oh, it had his lips buzzing as they parted slightly.
The desire flickering idly when he felt a quiver to that exhale when another kiss was given against the corner of his mouth where the blonde then lingered. Trembling breaths fanning over it left the spot warm, warm, warm. Had him flushed with that heat when he felt Oboro kiss at the side of his head gently. Fingers kneading at the back of his neck with firm rolls when Hizashi pulled back slightly with eyes meeting his own. Pupils expanding with that smolder. The silent question he'd wanted to see for years.
This was it. This was the thing Hizashi had spent three hours shrieking in his ear about as teenagers after he and Oboro had kissed for the first time. The kiss that Oboro had gushed to him later that day in between classes before they met up with the blonde. He'd had his first kiss but it hadn't been anywhere as impactful as the two men's had been but he knew this one would knock him out of the water. This would blow him away. His first kiss with Hizashi was one he'd imagined, fantasized, and dreamed about.
It had his breath trembling out of him only to hitch on an inhale; a gasp as his breaths shortened when he turned his head. A quiet whine ripping free from the back of his throat when trembling breaths fanned over his buzzing lips when he made the move. Finally, finally, finally made the move he'd been dying too in those quiet, electric moments together. And God, it was fucking everything he'd imagined it would be. It sent shivers down his back at the touch of those soft, warm lips against his own dryer lips.
Touches that allowed him to feel that softness when they'd peppered over his face seconds before. So, so soft. So, so warm. It had his breath rushing out of him on a shaking sigh when lips slid against his own in a caress. A kiss that had his toes curling when an arm moved from its wrapped position around his shoulders to come up. Fingers drifted over his uncomfortably hot cheek before cupping it gently. Like he was something precious. Made of a fine material that would shatter at the harshest treatment.
He felt arms squeezing him tight, tight, tight as lips slid against his in slow, soft kisses that wreaked absolute havoc on him. Had his heart racing against his chest like nothing else had this afternoon. Left him truly breathless when he slid his arm up from its position around Hizashi's waist. Hesitating before reaching up to twist his fingers cautiously into the blonde locks when he got a soft hum from the man. They spilled over the back of his hand and through his fingers silkily; just like he imagined they would.
It earned him a sigh fanning over his cheek when the blonde's thumb moved to roll circles into his cheekbone tearing a whine free from him. He was being kissed with such adoration and affection it had him shaking. Kissed with a tenderness that could reduce anyone to tears. To rip them apart from the inside out. The quiet whispering of their moving lips had a shiver running down his back when arms renewed their squeeze once again giving him that shot of warmth. A kiss was pressed to his shoulder.
It had him shuddering when the warmth of Oboro's breath fanned over the side of his neck before pressing another kiss against it. A light smack broke up that quiet whisper of moving lips as he tightened his fingers in the silky blonde locks instinctively. The light nudge of glasses against his eyebrow and cheekbone were annoying but God if he could ignore it for another caress of those smooth lips on his own. If it didn't take away from the electric shock of that excitement with each slide of those lips against his.
Fuck, he'd fantasized it so many times after the few slip ups where he'd caught Hizashi and Oboro twisted up together. When he'd catch the blonde tucked in the blue-haired man's lap with arms curled around those broad shoulders as kisses were traded back and forht with such enthusiasm it had him curious. Painfully, morbidly curious on what it felt like. To kiss them. It was perhaps one of the first fantasies of his that tore him apart. Ripped him into shreds with that longing after those few instances.
It had his breaths trembling in their shortening, racing intakes when the soft press of Hizashi's palm against his cheek pressed firmly with his thumb moving to caress. Stroke along his cheekbone gently. He could melt. He could turn into a puddle right now and he'd not feel a drop of shame about it. The soft caress of those lips against his had him wanting more, more, more. Fifteen years' worth. Fifteen years going forward worth of kisses from this man. Of course, with every relationship it may not last that long.
This might not last long given how some poly relationships he'd seen had their turmoil. That emotions could flicker and fizzle out for him but God, he could hope he'd still have them two or three years going forward. Be lucky enough to get ten or fifteen years to share with them. He let out a strained him of his own when he felt those soft lips melting against his. Lips that always leaned a bit towards the thinner side were melting to shape to his own. It was an odd thing. Feeling those lips against his own.
Molding and curving to fit with each sliding kiss given that had him leaning forward against the blonde when the hand on his cheek slid backwards. Twisting into his hair before cupping the back of his head to press lightly against the back of his head. Coaxing for a firmer touch of those lips to his own which he happily gave. God, he was thrumming. An endless current buzzing beneath his skin robbing him of breath as those sharp smacks rang out as Hizashi's lips fit to his own. An unfamiliar touch that he loves.
Oboro's fingers squeezed briefly at the back of his neck again with kisses being placed over the back of his shoulder. Felt through his shirt. It had shivers racing down his back when arms tightened around his waist when he squirmed with his own arms tightening around them. Squeezing Oboro close, close, close to him as he moved his lips with Hizashi's. Eager to move them in time with the blonde's causing those sharp smacks to ring out from the change in pressure. Fuck, he couldn't get enough. He felt drunk off of it.
Giddy at the thought of receiving another hit. Another kiss. Those light smacks ringing out had his stomach twisting sharply with that excitement as breaths fanned over his cheek. It was everything he could have ever imagined when it came to kissing Hizashi. Everything he hoped it to be. Hours. He could sit right here for hours with those soft lips on his. With arms wrapped around his waist and Oboro's lips against his shoulder. Kissing, touching, twisting himself into their holds on him with that desire finally being itched.
Finally being eased away. He could stay just like this, between the both of them as fingers kneaded at the back of his neck. With lips sliding lazily, slowly against his own with that firm press allowing him to marvel at that softness. How warm those lips were on his. An odd reluctance twisted into him when he pulled back from the kiss with a smack only to have the blonde chase after him. Lips coming down on his once, twice, three times in sharp pecks that had him leaning in to give a few of those frantic pecks.
Turning away with a shuddering breath before they could be deepened again. For as much as he wanted to sit and have those lips sliding against his until they felt familiar with their fit against his, he wanted something else. He wanted to kiss the blue-haired man silly as well. His face was uncomfortably hot when fingers pulled free from his hair with light tugs on the locks as he swallowed. Shifting in his spot he let his gaze flicker over the blonde's flushed face. The spark to those dilated eyes had his heart jumping wildly.
Choking him with those savage beats at the flutter of blonde lashes when the blonde blinked at him. That blush smothering itself over freckled cheeks beautifully with that deep red that spread down to his exposed collar bones. Stung in the tips of his ears as blonde locks fell from his fading bun to spill over his shoulders. Brushing against red cheeks as lips parted with his mouth hanging open just enough for him to catch the wink of his tongue piercing. Hizashi was so goddamn beautiful. So, so beautiful.
It had tempted him to lean in to catch those parted lips in another kiss but not yet. He'd come back to him, swore he would, as he swallowed before turning. Fidgeting when he turned towards Oboro to find the blue-haired man staring at him with a spark of his own in his gaze. Excited. His breaths hitched on a shuddering exhale at the blush smothering itself that nearly blended into the bronze of the blue-haired man's skin. Spreading down to his collar bones, it was a brilliant red on the tips of his ears.
Pupils contracting before expanding when he leaned forward with dark lashes fluttering down. Fuck, if that first kiss from Hizashi didn't have his stomach fluttering viciously then this tipped him right over. Had his stomach twisting, flipping, knotting up on him when chapped lips came down on his in a sliding caress. Whispering against his as a breath rushed out of him at the sigh over his cheek when fingers kneaded at him. Another pair of fingers then combed through his hair again before scratching idly at his head.
Sending shivers down his back when fingers then combed through to coax his hair away from his neck with those soft, warm lips pressing along the side of it. Trailing over the skin softly before making their way towards his shoulder leaving behind tingles racing under his skin. Pooling into his twisting stomach with the quiet whisper of moving lips ringing out once more as he moved his lips with Oboro's. The blue-haired man lips were nowhere full or thick but fuck if he didn't feel that spark the second they touched his.
If they didn't feel amazing against his own. felt good against his own. Perfect just as Hizashi's had. His upper lip had always been a touch fuller than the bottom, however, with a subtle Cupid's bow that always had him riveted to his lips in the past. It was an off-balance to his lips that wasn't noticed easily by the outside view, but he hadn't been just anyone, had he? He'd always been hyper aware of both men, hadn't he? Despite that chapped state Oboro's lips were in, he was absolutely soaring in his own head.
Giddily euphoric when those lips pressed firmly to his own with that slow speed as a sigh fanned over his cheek again when he felt fingers twisting into his left hand which he happily clung onto. Conjoined hands were then lifted up with lips fluttering over the back of his hand. His knuckles. So many kisses. So many touches. He felt damn near drunk off of them as he moved his lips eagerly to kiss the blue-haired man. Giddy when he received another soft brush of those lips in a kiss so tender, so sweet.
It had him tingling with that rush of warmth straight through his veins as his toes curled against the floor. Moving his lips against Oboro's with that same spark of eagerness to receive another kiss that he could return. To have those lips melting, shaping to curve and fit against his own with each slide. Fighting that urge to squirm with the delight it gave him. He wanted more, more, more. Everything he'd missed out on and more from them while returning everything. Giving them everything he had in him.
Showing them what he wanted for years to give them. Years of desires twisting in his chest. Lifting his hand up, he curved his right arm up over Oboro's shoulder to twist his fingers into soft blue ponytail of his that held them up away from his face. Airy. Slipping through his fingers effortlessly when he tightened his hair on Oboro's ponytail earned himself a shudder exhale over his cheek. Nails scratched gently at the back of his head again as that intermittent smack broke up the quiet brush of thier moving lips.
Another strained hum leaving him when he felt the hand in his dropping down to squeeze at both it and his thigh the best it could. Shuddering when kisses were once again trailed over his shoulder. God, he couldn't get enough. Not of the hands on him nor the lips on him. He needed them so desperately it left him squirming instinctively in his spot. His legs squeezing together against that urge to swing himself up into the blue-haired man's lap. He couldn't. He didn't want to move out of turn or instinctively yet.
Not without knowing what was or wasn't okay for him to do with the two of them. It was all so new. They'd yet to have talks about what was and wasn't okay for him to do. He didn't want to make a wrong move and have someone upset with him no matter how strong the desire was. The want to do as he had always imagined doing with them. Moving his lips with Oboro's had his racing breath trembling when the arm wrapped around his waist shifted. A hand moving to rest on his lower back with a light pull.
To coax him forward to scooch him closer towards the blue-haired man which he happily moved in accordance with. Whining quietly when he felt Hizashi moving with him as the blonde pressed into his back firmly with hands squeezing at him. Nails scratching at him again when he increased that firm press on Oboro's lips. Inching the speed up past that slow, lazy slides. It had lips pressing back harder to his own with that answering speed matching his own as those lips molded and curved to fit against his own.
It was everything, everything, everything. There was nothing he could have hoped for more than this. He felt the arms shifting around him loosen their holds on him when he was tugged forward. Hissing in a breath through his nose, he was dragged towards the right with his legs jerking out onto the floor to keep himself from slipping. Lips broke away from him with a sharp smack as he gasped when he was being pulled up. Forward into the blue-haired man's arms until he was sat on the man's lap.
He stiffened instinctively against the sudden change when hands slid along his waist in a caress. Waiting for Hizashi to complain. To snap it was far too much when the blue-haired man twisted his hips forward for him to sink into his lap for a comfortable position. It had his heart thudding in that sickening one-two hit at the grin curling over his lips; as if he knew exactly what was running through his mind. The playful sparkle to that gaze when he reached up his shaking hands to grab at his shoulders.
A light shake that went with the rest of him when Hizashi shuffled forward to take his previous place on the couch with a playful click of his tongue at him. Prompting him to look at the blonde when hands squeezed at his waist firmly with thumbs moving to roll circles into him as tingles raced up his back. He squeezed at his fistfuls of Oboro's shirt when Hizashi leaned forward with messy locks spilling over his shoulders. His breaths hitching when the blue-haired man turned from him towards Hizashi.
Leaning in to meet him in the middle as he, for once, felt more than content to gawk. To watch as lips met before sliding together with that quiet brush of that first kiss when Hizashi's hand came up to cup the side of Oboro's neck. His thumb, a chipped red, sliding along his jaw gently creating that quiet sound as it dragged over the stubble covering his jaw. He couldn't hope of tearing his gaze away. Such a simplistic thing for two people to kiss yet it had his heart jumping to his throat at the sight of lashes fluttering on red cheeks.
The brilliant glow of Hizashi's tanned hand against the bronze coloring of Oboro's skin. The kneading at his waist as that light smack rang out to break up the whispering of moving lips. He'd always felt shameful. Like a pervert to watch the two kiss in the past and yet he'd always been curious. Had been forced to keep his eyes down. He hadn't wanted to intrude or make the other awkward but now? Now it was thrilling. Watching lips moving as they shaped to mold and curve to one another far faster than they had to his own.
Familiar enough to melt quickly with those initial few slides. It had his breaths catching on quiet hitches at the flicker of heat beneath his skin when the blonde shifted forward for a firmer press to his side when the hand on his waist lifted away to stretch out to curl around the blonde where that hand kneaded at the blonde's waist. Tugging him closer, closer, closer much to his delight as a quiet hum left the blonde. Oh, they were beautiful. Always had been, always will be. Fuck, his head was swimming from the rush.
Admiring everything from the low lighting spilling through the windows with the dimming afternoon light. The brilliant, golden lighting allowing that bronze skin to appear deeper, richer, than it was? Dying the room in that deepening golden light to highlight the curves and dips of the blonde's body he could see effortlessly now when he glanced down? Highlighting a cheekbone? The sharp cut of their jaws? The smaller shadows of trembling lashes? God, it was fucking stunning. He couldn't look away now.
Not even for the sake of appearing to be polite when they would inevitably pull away. He felt another of those flickers of heat beneath his skin that had his breath hitching. A sizzling burst under his skin that settled low along his bones when that light brush of moving lips was broken up by a sharp smack. Consistent. A harder press of lips as they slid quickly with one another, he fought that urge to squirm. To twist and whine at the sight of those lips moving together with such passion it had his stomach fluttering.
Dropping at the sight of it. The scenario, truly, felt like something out of those feverish wet dreams he'd have. When he would fall asleep wondering what a situation like this would be like only for his brain to use made up sensations. Made up bits from his one night stands and his dates. The few relationships he had. But this was so much better than he could have ever thought it to be. How good Oboro felt against him. How soft Hizashi's lips were on his. The silky and fluffy feel of their hair around his fingers.
Those were all impossible to make up now. Far too impossible and he loves that. Loves, loves, loves that reality was so much different than he thought it to be. He felt euphoric. Hot. Watching the blue-haired man and blonde kissing before him with such uninhibited desire it left him choked up. He knew better than to expect sex tonight. With how frazzled he'd been all day, he didn't think his mind could handle it. He didn't think he wouldn't to handle it well emotionally. It would be another of those domino effects.
He'd fall apart with the intensity that would come with finally having sex with the two men he'd been longing, pining and crushing over for years. So disgustingly in love with both of them. It'd reduce him to tears, he was sure of it. Turn him into a sobbing mess to get what he'd wanted all these years. And yet he wanted that possibility to become reality. Surely, the two of them wouldn't hold it against him if he cried? If he teared up during it if they did a have sex? Or would it be easier to do it one at a time?
To overwhelm him less? He wanted to ask yet his throat felt tight. Thick. His lips tingled with that desire to kiss. To flutter his lips over those freckles and to kiss at Oboro's face. To pepper them with the affection that had been clawing at him for years to shower upon them. And he felt free to do it. They had asked and he had happily agreed to it. He was theirs as much as they were finally, finally his. Lips broke apart then with a sharp smack when he felt a flutter to his stomach when green and blue eyes flickered to him.
Fuck.
It was a shot of heat to his stomach at the sight of those blue and green irises rendered to rings of color around those wide pupils. How they smoldered at him like that with such desire it had his breaths hitching audibly on a sharp gasp when he moved. Moved without thinking twice about it to capture Oboro's lips in a kiss when he felt fingers pushing his hair away from his face to tuck behind his ear gently. Sharp smacks ringing out when he slid his lips eagerly against the blue-haired man's who returned his fervor.
He then forced his right hand to release his grip on the blue-haired man's shoulder to grab at the blonde to hold him close, close, close when a hand slid up his back. Sending waves of tingles under his skin when he arched instinctively with a sharp exhale. Lips moved quickly against his in those quick kisses that were returned to him with such enthusiasm it had him smoldering. Had him twisting close to the blue-haired man as a hand slid along his back and another kneading at his waist. He needed them so much.
Wanted them so fervently it had his breaths rasping through his nose as he crushed his lips to Oboro's with that eagerness. The quiet urgency simmering through his blood. Leaving him a shaking mess as he kissed the blue-haired man. Pouring that desire, that affection, that passion and love into that kiss. Showing it the only way he could when his words ultimately failed him. It had Oboro's breaths shuddering over his cheek as those emotions were thrown back at him into the kiss. Sizzling him with those emotions.
He cupped the back of Oboro's head gently as it pressed back to the back of the couch when he arched himself up slightly. He could feel the blonde's fingers plucked idly at his shirt before coming back up towards his hair. Twirling it with gentle tugs that had his stomach fluttering. Dropping airily. He slid his lips against those chapped ones as they grew damp allowing for that sharp smack to ring out deafeningly as hands held him. As if he were just as precious as Hizashi. Someone to be protected and held tightly.
He loves it. Loves, loves, loves it. He could only imagine what it'd feel like to be tucked into Hizashi's lap with hands touching him so tenderly. What he'd feel like beneath him with those soft lips on his. He could die happy. Die right now the happiest he'd ever been in the past fifteen years. In his entire life. A dramatic statement but goddammit, he was howling internally. Shouting, praying, thanking whatever God there was that he was finally having pity taken on him. That something was taking pity on him.
That his life was turning a bend he knew would come whether it was positive or negative. That the three of them couldn't go on anymore with this simmer tension. That he couldn't go on a second longer like this. It had his breaths shuddering out of him with each sharp smack ringing out as his lips moved with Oboro's. A firm press that allowed him to feel the slight fullness of that top lip and the thinner bottom lip of his that had him swallowing down a whine. Shivering when he felt a kiss being pressed to his upper arm.
Tightened his hand on the blonde in response to hold him closer to his side. Clutching the man tightly to him with that desire to have them both closer, closer, closer to him. Needing them to be closer so badly. Needed to feel them both there against him to assure his frazzled mind that this was real. That they were real. He felt Oboro pulling back to break the kiss with a sharp smack when he whined as he chased after those lips. Pecking at them once, twice, three times with a fourth coming with a longer press.
It sent a jolt of heat down his back when he pulled back as he leaned back in the blue-haired man's gasp with a shuddering gasp being taken by himself and Oboro. Turning his head then towards the blonde who leaned in eagerly with those soft, warm lips coming down on his in pecking kisses. Short kisses that rang out sharply once, twice, three times more as he tightened his holds on shoulders desperately. Twisting the fabric around his fingers to hold onto them both when he flew forward for a fifth kiss.
Much like with Oboro's, the blonde pressed his lips to his own for a second longer to send another of those heated jolts through him when the blonde pulled back from him. Taking a shallow, shaking breath when he pressed a kiss to the tip of the blonde's nose instinctively. If that didn't leave him breathless at the giggles leaving Hizashi when beaming smiles were aimed at him from both men. The affection that sparkled in their gazes with that warmth when hands raised up. Abandoning their places on him quickly.
Both coming up to cup his uncomfortably hot face; Hizashi's hand on his right cheek and Oboro's hand to his left. Thumbs slid along his cheekbones when he felt that sharp twist of emotion making his throat tight again. A knot of emotion that threatened to unravel when he blinked against that sting in his gaze when palms pressed to his cheeks to which he tipped his face forward into them. Soft and dry. Thumbs slid along his cheekbones again as his cheeks throbbing lightly from the force of that blush.
He released his holds on Oboro and Hizashi's shoulders respectively then with that light shake when he took a breath. Lifting his hands up, wavering briefly before he was touching the tips of his fingers to hot cheeks. Swallowing against that knot of emotion again, the blonde tipped his face towards the tips of his fingers coaxing him to slid his hand forward. Pressing his palm to that freckled cheek when lips pressed to the tips of his left hand. A flutter over them coaxing him to press his hand to that bronze cheek.
Admiring the heat of that blush melting into the beautiful color. A lovely, lovely color on both the blue-haired man and the blonde when he slid his thumbs in a caress over cheekbones gently. His heart jumping up to his throat when Hizashi nuzzled his face into his palm with a kiss that sent tingles up his arm. Hands pressed to his own hot face firmly when he let out a shuddering breath. It was unbelievable. Reality didn't work this way nor was it so perfect. Life wasn't easy like this. It wasn't some rom-com on TV.
It didn't just hand him something on a silver platter after all of these years. Perseverance didn't mean he would get Hizashi. That he would get Oboro. He knew that from the very beginning that no matter how hard or how badly he wanted to try that it wouldn't mean a thing. He'd always thought his window to be with either of them had closed. Slammed shut when the two began dating and sealed when they'd gotten engaged. While he'd been absolutely crushed with that heartache, he'd tried his best to push through it.
To be there for the both of them. It was agony to be so close yet unable to get the very thing he wanted. Heartbreaking. Wanting to be happy for them was all he wanted and he'd been happy once that heartbreak had eased slightly. It didn't stop his longing, It didn't stop his crushes from snowballing into something acheful. Something painful when he was in such close proximity. And yet by some damn luck, feelings had formed in the blonde and blue-haired man. It had taken hold and they were being returned to him.
Hearing the words he'd wanted to hear after fifteen long years of pining. Of that unrequited love he held for the both of them. Life was giving him both men on a silver platter for him to take. For him to love openly and it choked him up. It was all he'd ever wanted. He didn't believe life worked beautifully like this. Life was cruel. Hard. But sometimes it can be ridiculously, unbelievably perfect. Life could be good. Merciful to him and to others. Life can have its upwards swings and it can have its downwards swings.
It was what he made it, but this was a surprise he never thought would come. A change to his life he hadn't predicted happening this afternoon. And he was tasting that euphoria the longer that hand kneaded at his waist. The longer the two looked at him with such adoration it had his throat tightening. Thick with that mortifying sting to his eyes. The feel of hot cheeks beneath his palms. Lips tingling from the kisses traded, no matter how briefly, between the two of them. But he wanted to ask the question clawing at him.
He wanted to say it and be told back. Needed that affirmation just once more before he could let himself sink into that delight. That joy. He wanted that exhilarated rush to hear them accept it the way they no doubt had. For fifteen years or going on two, it was all too painfully abundant of that spark. He'd do whatever he could to make this work. Make things balanced between the three of them for he wanted it to work. He wanted them both for as long as he could have them. And he wanted to ask that simplistic question.
"Oboro? Zashi?" God, his voice sounded choked. Tight. He could hardly squeeze their names out of that tight knot when he swallowed once more when both men perked up. A hum leaving the blonde when thumbs brushed over his cheek bones again. Just once. One question and he'd believe them. He'd go about this without a second thought. He'd go to couples therapy with them. He'd believe it. "Wi-Will you both please, please go out with me? Will you please be my boyfriends?"
Oh, the warmth aimed his way threatened to make his eyes sting when he blinked it away. The blonde, however, had not a worry about that when he noticed the sheen to those green eyes making them shine at him. Glistening when a laugh burst out of the blonde with that choked quality. "Of course I will! I'd be more than happy to be your boyfriend, Sho!"
His gaze flicked to Oboro instinctively when the blonde turned to him and the sweetness to that smile had him biting at his inner cheek. There was so much affection, such an adoring look it had his heart skipping wildly in his chest when the blonde leaned into the blue-haired man's side. The hand on his waist slid away with that arm curling around him to tug him tightly to his chest. Hizashi to his side when lips pressed to his jaw. "I'd love nothing more than to be your boyfriend, Shouta!"
It had his stomach fluttering with those butterflies at the words spoken with such conviction. Such joy. And he let himself melt into their holds when Hizashi's arm dropped from his cheek to wrap around him again in a tight hug. Curling into that broad chest, he bit viciously at his inner cheek to keep that knot of emotion from overwhelming him when lips pressed to his jaw and cheek in pecking kisses. Euphoria didn't touch that emotion. Joy, happiness, delight too weak. And he could happily go without naming it.
They were his.