As I come to after the flash of white, Ness is holding me up with an arm while a force tugs at my other. And it isn't until Ness yanks me towards him and Poo hoists himself up that I remember that I was holding him. Evidently I let go, so it's a good thing that Poo's grip on my wrist was tight.

I glance over at the sound of footsteps to see Jeff running towards us, battered but not in danger of collapsing, with the Starmen nowhere in sight. And as the noise fades to a steady walk, what's left is the eerie background noise of the Fire Spring's rumbling.

"Thanks for the save, both of you," Poo says, nodding at me and Ness.

"How can you say that?" Ness snaps. "You're my friend and I almost…"

Poo raises an eyebrow. "If it makes you feel better, Paula and Jeff nearly died because of me when I was a thrall. It was an unfortunate situation, but guilt doesn't help anyone."

"And it's that easy for you?" Ness's fingers start trembling. "You were an inch away from dying, Poo. Does your own life mean nothing to you?"

"It means as much and as little as the choices I make with it," Poo says. "Don't say anything you can't take back, Ness. Let's get you out of the heat and get you a cold glass of water, and then we'll talk."

Ness's eye twitches. That's all the warning I get before Poo darts away, yanking me back. Ness falls to his knees, head in his hands, psychic sparks of electricity surging from my body. In a moment of disbelief, I look down at my own hands. There's no way my Thunder PSI could have gone off a time like…

"Shit." Ness looks down at the floor. "Not again."

Again? So this has to be something Ness's body is doing to himself. He grimaces, and the way his chest moves tells me something's coming up right before he bends forward and vomits. Trembling, a thread of spittle still dangling from his mouth, he turns to us with horrified eyes.

"Go away," he says. "None of you were supposed to see me like this."

I move to run towards him, but Poo grabs onto my hand. When I glance back, he looks deep in thought.

"We can give you some space, Ness," he says. "But you have to stay within eyesight. You're getting out of this place, and it won't do for you to collapse from heat."

"This place doesn't cause heatstroke like the desert, remember?" Ness's voice is bitter. "Just leave me."

"I'm sorry," Poo says. "But I'm not taking my eyes off you. That's non-negotiable."

Ness sighs, getting to his feet. "Fine. Let's get this over with."

The three of us exit Fire Spring into the cave, and true to his word Poo keeps us as far ahead of Ness as we can be while still seeing him. During the stretches without turns, this means we're far enough away to talk without him hearing.

"Sorry to step in like that, Paula," Poo says. "I wasn't trying to shut you down, really. I was… worried about what Ness would do. What he shares with you is special. After all, you were his first companion on a previously lonely journey. It's clear he didn't want any of us to see him in that state, but," Poo takes a deep breath. "I think he hated looking that way in front of you most of all."

I blink. Even five years ago, Ness was the dashing hero who rescued me from Carpainter first and Monotoli second. He was my sword and shield, shouldering blow after blow for me with a smile.

How much of that was fear of showing weakness?

"I agree," Jeff says. "Trust me, Paula. He will listen to you. In fact, you get through to him in a way that we can't. But we can't have that conversation here and now."

"The two of you agreeing on something?" I force a smile. "Are we in Moonside or am I dreaming?"

"Given how the three of you described Moonside," Poo says, "I'm starting to believe it was a collective fever dream on your part. So the answer could be both."

Jeff scoffs. "Imagine the religious monk having such a limited ability to comprehend the metaphysical. Disgraceful. If anything was the fever dream, it's your existence. You only appeared to us after we got high on magic cake."

…And they're back at it again. The little banter does make me relax, and Poo is careful to keep an eye on Ness above all else. We manage to get out of the cave without any altercations.

"You want to teleport back home, Ness?" Poo asks.

"No."

Silence lingers into the air until it's absorbed by insect buzzing.

"Then you should come with us to Saturn Valley. We have matters to discuss with Dr. Andonuts."

Ness glares at him. "You saw what happened when you and Paula got close. You want to electrocute those poor Mr. Saturns?"

"Easier to explain the phenomenon to them and have them avoid you than a human settlement," Poo says. "We're not leaving you on your own, Ness."

"And what gives you the right to keep me chained to you?"

"Please, Ness," I say. "There are dinosaurs looking to make you into a snack, and Saturn Valley is safe. You don't have to talk with us if you don't want to, but we at least need to know where you are."

Ness slouches. "Fine. But don't let the Mr. Saturns wander close."

Poo teleports us off to Saturn Valley, and as the world reforms around me I see Ness pop into existence a few seconds later. Poo and Jeff begin telling the Mr. Saturns about what happened to Ness, and after looking away for a second I glance back to see Ness walking out towards Grapefruit Falls. I duck out into the cave after him.

After emerging out at the river leading to Grapefruit falls, I don't see any sign of Ness. He had better not have teleported out of here. Well, downstream leads to Threed, and I doubt Ness is headed that way if he wants to mope off on his own. That leaves only upstream—again, assuming he didn't teleport—in the direction of Master Belch's factory. A place empty and with enough painful memories to be perfect for indulging in self-pity.

It's almost scary how easy it is for me to follow the thoughts of someone who hates themself and wants to be left alone.

I approach Grapefruit Falls to see that Ness is naked and using the waterfall as a makeshift shower, his clothes stacked in a neat pile nearby. Okay, now I feel bad about tracking him. As I turn to leave, Ness's gaze meets mine.

Shit. I tense, ready to endure another verbal lashing, but instead his expression softens.

"I'm sorry, Paula." I can barely hear his voice over the waterfall. "I should have told you where I was going."

"And I should have trusted that you wouldn't run off without a reason. I'll give you some space."

"I meant what I said in Winters, you know. I'm not embarrassed about this sort of thing." A pause. "A part of me hates Poo for being right. Some water and a cold shower takes all the anger away."

I hesitate. It feels weird to stay and stare while he's showering, but now I can't duck away without leaving the conversation unfinished.

"Right, but you do get squeamish," Ness says. "Sorry. I'll let you go."

"No, I…" I take a deep breath, collecting my words. "I want to be here for you."

"Thanks. And thank you for saving me while I was a thrall."

"I'm sorry I took so long. I can't imagine what it must have been like to be dragged away and watch your friend not even care."

"Probably not any worse than a friend breaking one or two of your ribs with a baseball bat."

But that doesn't count when Ness wasn't in control of himself. I open my mouth to say as much, and then realize the point he's making.

"I guess not."

Our conversation drifts into silence. I want to help Ness, but there's only so much I can do to alleviate the awkwardness of chatting while he's naked under a waterfall. Is there another way I can assist? I glance over at his pile of clothes.

"You got a change of clothes?" I ask.

Ness shakes his head.

"Why don't I call up Tracy and see if she can deliver some of your clothes through Escargo? You know how fast they are. Oh, and I'll lie and say you're unconscious so your mom won't be expecting a call if you want to take some time to yourself."

Ness's expression softens. "If you really don't mind."

"Not at all. And I'll bundle your dirty clothes up and send them back to your house so you don't have to keep lugging them around. That all right?"

"You don't have to do that, Paula. Those clothes are all sweaty and gross from me being in the Fire Spring."

"That's the point of replacing them with a clean set, isn't it?"

Ness snorts. "You're being really nice to me after how much of an ass I was to you."

"Well, it's not like you ignored me on purpose for five years or anything crazy like that. What kind of friend would be that petty?"

While Ness hesitates, I keep going.

"And honestly, it's not some huge favor compared to what we did for each other in the past. I fought a barf monster at your side in the factory that's literally right behind where you're standing. Trust me, I can handle some sweaty clothes."

"Point taken. Thanks, Paula."

I gather up his clothes and stuff them into my bag—which really isn't that bad, since the shorts aren't even that sweaty and I can use them to pick up everything else—and begin to leave.

"Hey Paula."

"Hmm?" I glance back at him.

"Do you have a change of clothes?"

"Yeah." I look back at the towel that was by Ness's dirty laundry. "Forgot to pack a towel, though. Oh, but it's fine. I can use Fire PSI to evaporate the water."

"Out in the open by Grapefruit Falls?" Ness raises an eyebrow. "I have an extra towel and my bag. I'll leave it for you, along with the bottle of body wash. Maybe this is bad for my hair, but I use it as shampoo too. You could give that a shot."

"Can't be worse than when we kept teleporting back here to stay at the Mr. Saturn's place with no running water because you were too cheap to get us a hotel room."

Ness laughs. It's more subdued than usual, and the same underlying harshness in all of his words is still present. But it's still nice to hear the sound.

"Reason number five hundred and twenty-seven why I'm lucky the rest of you put up with me. Can't believe I got to take a girl I liked on an adventure around the world and insisted that we stay with weird little critters and no running water instead of getting actual hotel rooms."

Is this the first time Ness has admitted that he likes me? Or at least liked me at the time of our adventure. I'll process that later.

"And I wouldn't trade that adventure for anything in the world," I say. "I'll be back with a set of clean clothes soon, Ness."

His expression softens, and I can only tear my gaze away from him when he goes to get more body wash. And good thing, too. As fast as Escargo Express is, I don't want to leave Ness under that cold waterfall for longer than necessary.

And as I head back, it hits me that the events of the last thirty minutes have been everything I hated about myself for the last five years. I let Poo shut me down, tasked myself with following Ness like I'm his mom, and now I'm doing chores for him like a housewife.

Whenever I deviated from my expected role, I was slapped onto broadcast for the entire country to see. When I tried to express myself, my parents threatened to throw me out on the street. And I told myself that if I could become strong and defiant enough, if I didn't need Ness or anyone else to step in and save me.

But now I've circled back around. I'm the mediator of bickering boys, and the one who makes sure Ness is taking care of himself. I'm passive, acknowledging my role, but I'm not constrained by it. I'm free, letting one event take me to the next, thinking about how to help my friends instead of worrying about standards to resist or be complicit in.

I'm happy.