A successful call with Escargo Express later, I return to Ness with a change of clean clothes. He's dried off and has a towel wrapped around his waist, which makes me feel a little less awkward about staring. In fact, I keep looking until Ness tells me to set down the clothes and back off so we don't risk what happened back at Fire Spring hurting me.

I'm tempted to argue. After all, it's not like a little surge of PSI energy is really going to hurt me. But for now, I let him do things his way.

And after he leaves is my turn to wash up and get changed. I've spent enough time cooled off that the water of Grapefruit Falls is frigid rather than refreshing, and I barely last a few minutes before drying off and changing into a new set of clothes.

Upon making it back to Saturn Valley, Poo and Jeff catch me and say that we should all have a conversation together about our next steps. Ness insists on staying several feet away from us, which means that we have to raise our voices, but at least he's not at our throats anymore.

"Two sanctuaries left," Jeff says. "Magnet Hill and Lumine Hall. Tracy told us that Ana is in the Fourside Sewers, leaving Ninten to guard Lumine Hall."

"I suggested moving on ahead," Poo says, "But Jeff has no stamina and complained until I agreed to let us rest for the night."

"Good call," I say. "I'm pooped as well."

"You'd think Poo would be the most pooped," Jeff says. After a pause, "You know, because his name is-"

"Do all genius scientists have the humor of an eight-year-old," Poo says, "Or is it only you?"

At this point, I notice that Ness has been quiet the whole time.

"Something on your mind?" I ask.

"You…" He looks up at us. "The three of you should go without me."

Silence. Jeff and Poo exchange a glance, with even Poo looking worried.

"You're our leader, Ness," Jeff says.

"Well, some leader I've been. Getting captured and telling you off, forcing you to play therapist, and oh yeah." He stands up. "Almost killing two of you."

"That wasn't your fault," I say.

"Oh?" Ness says. "I remember what Poo said. That Jeff nearly died because of him. Not that he almost killed Jeff. Answer me, Poo. Did you attack them like I did?"

"Sounds like you already know the answer." Poo's words are even. "Getting stuck on that comparison doesn't help anyone. What matters is what we do now that you're back."

"And I'm giving the answer," Ness says. "You leave me behind. I'm unstable. Deny it, any of you."

I fumble for the right words, Jeff flinches, and Poo looks as impassive as ever.

"That's what I thought," Ness says. "Besides, we don't know for sure that all the influence from the Starmen is gone. They could have some brainwashing code that could activate and make me betray you at the last second."

"You're asking us to prove a negative, Ness," Jeff says. "That's the last conversation any scientist wants to get into. We don't have any reason to suspect that the Starmen possession left any lasting effects on you."

"Oh yeah? What about the way I broke down and psychic lightning started surging through my body?"

"You implied that happened before," I say.

Ness whips his head towards me, and then his eye contact breaks.

"Shit," he says.

Then he walks towards the cave in the back of Saturn Valley. The Mr. Saturns, who normally barely seem to notice our presence, follow their instructions and give him a wide berth. Leaving the three of us to watch Ness storm off into the darkness.

"Well then," Jeff says. "That could have gone better."

"Actually, that was better than what I was expecting," Poo says. "Ness was more present as a thrall than what you two were describing from the others. Worked out for us since he didn't knock me and Paula off into the abyss, but it's no wonder he's like this."

"So what do we do?" I say.

Both pairs of eyes to go to me.

"What?" I say.

"If anyone knows how to get through to him," Jeff says. "It's you."

"But." I glance at Poo. "You're able to get a read on people, aren't you? Can't you use that to help Ness?"

"Well, that read is telling me that he doesn't actually want to be left alone," Poo says. "But I don't know if me confronting him about that will help."

Someone going through a bad phase and then actively avoiding their friends while secretly wanting them. Where have I heard that one before?

"I'll try," I say. And after a pause, "But since we're on the subject. What did they do to make you a thrall, Poo? And do you think any of that is still left in you?"

"Ah, that story is simple. I got jumped while meditating, likely by Ninten and Ana. My memory is a little hazy. They showed me the same serenity they were pushing onto you, and called Starmen in to sustain the effect. I retreated into myself to avoid that push, which left me with only the emptiness. So they took me to Pink Cloud and I continued meditating."

"And you stayed like that for days?" Jeff says. "Damn, maybe there is something to that monk training after all."

"As for lingering effects," Poo says. "It is as Jeff says. There is much about this world that is beyond my reach or comprehension, so I can't be definitive. But I don't feel any different than I did before they took me, and I have no reason to think that there should be lingering influence after you cleared out all the psychic energy they implanted into me."

So Ness shouldn't be a threat to us. It will be hard to make him see that, but I'm glad to have it confirmed.

"Last thing," I say. "Do these Mr. Saturns have a picnic blanket to spare?"

#

A half-hour later, I head inside the cave with a takeout bag and a picnic blanket to see Ness stewing in the corner. Even before I approach, I see a small jolt of psychic lightning run through his body. When he sees me, he hops to his feet and glares.

"What part of storming off into a cave do you not…" He blinks, looking at the takeout bag.

"Burger shop," I say. "I figured you were hungry. You're lucky they deliver all the way out here."

"Oh." His shoulders relax. "Thanks. You can leave it by the entrance and I'll grab it."

"Actually, I wanted to keep you company. Only one picnic blanket, and part of the order is for me too."

"I appreciate that, Paula. But I can't put you in danger. This PSI energy might attack you at any moment."

"PSI Shield α."

As a rainbow sheen coats my skin, Ness raises an eyebrow.

"Now I don't have anything to fear from rogue PSI energy. Can I stay?"

Ness lets out a dry laugh. "To think for years I was fantasizing about sharing a meal just the two of us. And this is how it happens."

I take that as accepting my offer and set up the picnic blanket. And when I pull out the burgers and fries, Ness does sit down across from me.

"Why?" Ness says.

"Hm?"

"Why are you being so nice to me? I was rude on purpose so…" He takes a deep breath. "So that you'd leave me behind and find something better to do with your time."

"Funny. I remember asking you the same thing when you wanted to go on this adventure with me."

Ness nods at that, and we begin digging in.

"Man," he says. "You've really had to be the mom friend today, huh? Making sure I have clean clothes and dinner. Guess I really am the stereotype, aren't I?"

I frown. "Stereotype?"

"The macho guy who can't work out his emotions and gets aggressive whenever something goes his way. While also needing some poor girl to handle all the life skills for him."

Is that all Ness thinks of himself as? It's clear that looking for an excuse to engage in self-pity, and I nearly say as much, but then I think back to our early conversations. Of me being so terrified of being the damsel that my first response after being saved was to hate myself rather than appreciate Ness.

"Well," I say. "If you don't like acting that way, you could tell me what's on your mind."

Ness sighs, and a psychic spark flies off him towards me. He freezes as it does, but the spark dissipates upon touching my hand without even reducing the energy of my PSI shield.

"Doesn't that make me more of a pathetic loser man?" Ness says. "That I need to dump all my emotional problems on you instead of handling them myself?"

"Don't think about that. Please, I want to be there for you."

Ness digs back into his burger, finishing it after a few bites. He licks his fingers, freezes and glances at me in embarrassment halfway through, and then continues after I offer him a nod.

"You're right," he says. "I should have brought this up before. This isn't your first time asking about it, after all."

It isn't? I rack my mind, and I recall one topic I did inquire about. The nightmare Ness didn't want to discuss.

"About a year and a half after our adventure," Ness says. "King passed. He had a good life. I was sad, but it was clear for months before that it was coming. I was prepared."

The pain in his eyes tells me the loss is still there. He pauses, and then continues.

"We had a little family memorial planned," Ness says. "Nothing fancy. Just a chance to get together and talk about what King meant to us." He takes a deep breath. "And my dad didn't show up. Was too busy at work, he said. He just had to go in on the weekend."

Now that Ness mentions it, I don't think I've ever met his dad. I know the man financially supported Ness's journey, but Ness always talked about him as if he were a stranger.

"I had a full meltdown," Ness says. "Screaming, crying, snotty and rolling on the ground. Imagine that. The hero who was plastered all around Onett as some invincible defender of justice losing his shit over a dead dog and daddy issues."

The harsh tone Ness takes with himself makes me wince. A year and a half after our journey means he was only thirteen at the time.

"My mom tried to console me, and my powers went off. Electrocuted her. Tried to heal with Lifeup and it only made things worse. So I ran off into the woods. Camped out for the night by where the meteorite hit. In the end, I only came back because I was homesick. My mom had to console me after she was the one who got fried by my powers."

At this point, Ness is looking past me with haunted eyes. I reach over and put a hand on his leg. He stiffens at first, but then shoots me a thankful smile.

"And that's what my nightmares are about," he says. "Hurting her, again and again. Sometimes Giygas is swallowing her up. Sometimes Pokey is torturing her. Every time, I run forward and try to save her. Whenever I touch her, I electrocute her. I kill her. The last thing I hear before waking up is always the same. The scream she let out when she reached out to comfort her son and got a blast of psychic lighting for her troubles."

He looks down at his hands, sparks flying off of them as his fingers tremble.

"And I miss her," he says. "I want to call her, but I don't want her to hear me like this. I want her to hug me, but I can't touch anyone without hurting them. And I thought that if I pushed you all away…"

"That at least you couldn't hurt anyone other than yourself," I finish.

Ness looks up at me, his eyes wide in surprise. "How did you…?"

"You're as much of an open book as I am. And we're not as different as I thought."

"Hm." Ness exhales, tension receding from his posture. "I guess so. Thank you for listening, Paula. I've never told that to anyone before. Now you're one of three people who knows."

Three? There's Ness's mom, me, and…

"Tracy was there to see it all, of course," Ness says. "And as hard of a time as she gives me about everything else, she has never once used that incident to hurt me. It's one of the reasons I'll forgive almost anything she does."

Ness shakes his head, looking up at the ceiling.

"I really thought I was past this. Getting all sad and homesick when the first thing goes wrong. That was never a part that made it into the stories about our journey, you know."

I can imagine. Ness's image is of a boy invincible, unfaltering. Mentioning the way he sniffled and cried with his mom on the phone doesn't make him look cool or powerful, so of course it was cut.

Why did I ever think I was the only one being shoved in a little box?

"Thank you for sharing," I say. "But there's one thing you said that isn't true."

"Hm?" Ness looks back at me.

"You said that you can't hug anyone without hurting them. And as we've established," I look down at the rainbow sheen over my skin, "That isn't true."

"Paula." His eyes look like they're about to melt. "I'm not pathetic enough to pretend you're my mom and ask for a hug."

"Then don't pretend I'm your mom," I say. "And see this for what it is. Comfort from a…"

I try to say "friend," but the word doesn't come out. And really, both of us have to know on some level that our feelings for each other include more than friendship. I don't know if I can speak that into existence now, not when this conversation is about Ness opening up instead of me being lovey-dovey, but I also can't keep pretending like it isn't there at all.

"Comfort from someone who cares about you," I say. "Comfort from someone who's been on this adventure with you the longest. Comfort from someone who feels at home when you're around, and hopes that she can help you fight off the homesickness too."

I extend my arms out in a suggestion.

"Comfort," I say, "From someone who wants to be there for her favorite person in the world."

When Ness bites his lip, I know I have him. He throws himself into my arms, and I hold him steady. Psychic sparks fly off his body like crazy, but I don't feel anything at all when they hit my PSI shield. He trembles in my arms, two hundred pounds of muscle but as fragile as a twig, and I rock him back and forth. He leans forward so far over my shoulder that his cap falls off, and I start running a hand through his hair.

"I still…" he draws a shaky breath. "I still hate myself for letting you see me like this."

"I know," I say. "And I'm proud of you for letting me hold you anyway. I'll be here as long as you need."

He stiffens. "Don't say that, Paula. It's getting dark out and I don't want you to go. I need to sleep here in this cave and-"

"And I'll fall asleep at your side. All you have to do is say the word."

Ness's whole body shakes as he wracks a sob, once again melting in my arms.

"Stay with me," he says. "Please."