The Warriors: From Zero to Hero

Chapter 22

After defeating Nessus and getting from the others except Phil the gang went to go check on Meg

Hercules kept riding on Nessus before he held on to a tree branch and crashed Nessus into a tree Nessus got angry but Hercules punched him into the air for a while before he fell back down into the water with horseshoes hitting his head and Pegasus blew him into the water and stomped all over his body

How was that, Phil? Hercules said

Rein it in, rookie. You can get away with mistakes like those in the minor decathlons, but this is the big leagues! Phil said

(Sighs) At least i beat him. Didn't I? Hercules said

Next time, don't let your guard down because of a pair of big goo-goo eyes! Phil said

Don't be so stubborn Phil. Hercules said

What? Phil said

How did i do guys? Hercules said

Awesome. Punk said

Impressive. Batman said

Spectacular. Sophitia said

Pretty good. Hulk said

See? My friends said i did great. Hercules said

Oh please. Phil said

What? Hercules said

D-oh! It's like I keep tellin' ya. Phil said

Hercules wasn't listening to Phil as he was looking at the woman

You gotta stay focused, and you... Phil said

Pegasus held his hoove for a high-five but Hercules ignored him as well and then he and Phil got angry

(Growls) Pegasus growled

I know right? Phil said

Hercules and The Warriors walk up to the woman

Uh... Hercules said

Can i help you? the woman said

Are you, uh, all right, Miss, uh... Hercules said

Megara. My friends call me Meg. At least they would if i had any friends. the woman said

Oh. Hercules said

So, did they give you a name along with all those rippling pectorals? Meg said

Uh, i'm, um, uh... Hercules said

Are you always that articulate? Meg said

Hercules. Hercules. Said

What? Meg said

My...my name is Hercules. Hercules said

Hercules, huh? Meg said

Yeah. Hercules said

I think i prefer wonderboy. Meg said

Wonderboy? Hercules said

That's right. Meg said

Are you sure? Hercules said

Yeah. Meg said

But... Hercules said

Relax it's just a nickname. Meg said

A nickname? Hercules said

Yeah. Meg said

Okay. Hercules said

So who are these guys? Meg said

Guys? Hercules said

The four people behind you. Meg said

Oh, they're my friends. Hercules said

Your friends? Meg said

Yeah. Hercules said

What are their names? Meg said

CM Punk. Batman. Sophitia. And Hulk. Hercules said

Hey. Punk said

Hello. Batman said

Hi. Sophitia said

Hulk say hello. Hulk said

Nice to meet you all. Meg said

You too. Punk said

Pegasus covers Hercules's face with his wings but Hercules ignores it and continues to talk with Meg

So, uh, how-how-how'd you get mixed up with the, uh... Hercules said

Pinhead with hooves? Meg said

Yeah. Hercules said

Well, you know how men are. They think that "no" means "yes" and "get lost" means "take me, I'm yours". Meg said

What? Hercules said

Don't worry, Shorty here can explain it to ya later. Meg said

(Growls) Phil growled

Well, thanks for everything, Herc. It's been a real slice. Meg said

Wait! Hercules said

What is it? Meg said

Um...can we give you a ride? Hercules said

Pegasus snorts whinnies and jumps to a high branch of a tree

Uh, i don't think your Pinto likes me very much. Meg said

Pegasus? Oh, no, don't be silly. He'd be more than happy to... Hercules said

Hercules got hit in the head with an apple that was purposely thrown by Pegasus

Ow! Hercules said

Pegasus was whistling innocently as if to say he didn't do anything wrong

What's with your horse? Meg said

No idea. Hercules said

Oh...anyway. I'll be all right. I'm a big, tough girl. I tie my own sandals and everything. Meg said

Are you sure? Hercules said

I'm sure. Trust me. Meg said

Alright. Hercules said

Thanks. Bye-bye Wonderboy. Meg said

Meg then left as she walked through the forest while Hercules waved goodbye

Bye...she's something, isn't she, guys? Hercules said

Totally. Punk said

Absolutely. Batman said

Pretty much. Sophitia said

Hulk say yeah. Hulk said

Yeah, oh yeah, she's really something. A real pain in the patella! Phil said

She is so beautiful. Hercules said

Hello? Earth to Herc! Come in Herc! Come in Herc! Phil said

Yeah? Hercules said

We got a job to do, remember? Phil said

We do? Hercules said

Yeah. We do. Phil said

Right...what was it again? Hercules said

Seriously? Phil said

Sorry. I just forgot that's all. Hercules said

You guys remember right? Phil said

We need to head to Thebes correct? Sophitia said

That's right. Phil said

Oh. Hercules said

Anyway. Thebes is still waitin'. Phil said

Sophitia Hercules and Phil got on Pegasus while the others joined them and they left

Yeah. Yeah. I know. Hercules said

Megara walks into the forest and comes upon a rabbit and a small gopher

Aw...how cute. A couple of rodents looking for a theme park. Meg said

Who you callin' a rodent, sister? I'm a bunny! the bunny said

A-And i'm his gopher. the gopher said

The bunny and the gopher then turn into Pain and Panic

Ta-dah! Pain and Panic both said

(Sighs) i thought i smelled a rat. Meg said

Meg. Hades said

Speak of the devil. Meg said

Meg, my little flower, my little bird, my little nut, Meg. What exactly happened here? Meg said

You tell me. Meg said

Cute. I thought you were gonna persuade the river guardian to join my team for the uprising, and here i am, kind of river guardian-less. Hades said

I gave it my best shot, but he made me an offer i had to refuse. Meg said

Fine. So, instead of subtracting two years from your sentence, hey, i'm gonna add two on, okay? Give that your best shot. Hades said

What? Meg said

You heard me. Hades said

It wasn't my fault. It was that wonderboy, Hercules. Meg said

Hades's eyes widen with suspicion after he heard what Meg said

Hercules? Why does that name ring a bell? Panic said

I don't know. Um, maybe we owe him money? Pain said

What was that NAME again? Hades said

Hercules. Meg said

Hades got angry after hearing what Meg said again

He comes on with this big, innocent farm boy routine but i could see through that in a Peloponnesian minute. Meg said

Wait a minute. Wasn't Hercules the name of that kid we were supposed to... Pain said

Yup. Panic said

Boys? Hades said

Yeah? Pain and Panic said

Come here. Hades said

Oh, my gods! Pain and Panic said

Pain and Panic see Hades preparing to grab them

Run for it! Panic said

Pain and Panic try running for their lives until Hades grabs them by their tails extending his arms

So you took care of him, huh? Dead as a doornail. Weren't those your exact words? Hades said

This might be a different Hercules. Pain said

Yeah! I mean, Hercules is a... Panic said

Panic gets choked by Hades who was angry

Very popular name nowadays! Panic said

Pain gets choked by Hades who was still angry

Remember, like, a few years ago every other boy was named Jason and the girls were all named Brittany? Pain said

I'm about to rearrange the Cosmos. Hades said

Hades flings Pain and Panic on the ground turning them into cockroaches

And the one SCHLEMIEL WHO CAN LOUSE IT UP IS WALTZING AROUND IN THE WOODS! Hades said

Hades was very angry that Hercules was still alive after Pain and Panic had failed to kill him but how angry will he get when he hears something else that could also ruin his plans to take over Mount Olympus stay tuned

TO BE CONTINUED