- Baek Ah -
It had been a long day of travelling, made worse by the torrential rain that had pelted down for the last quarter of his ride. Baek Ah left small puddles with each footstep along the palace corridor, thankful there was no one in sight to witness his bedraggled state. Even his thick wool cloak had succumbed to the downpour, swelling in thickness and weight, so that it now resembled a battered farm rug more closely than a tailored garment.
The wind was still howling outside, but the smooth wooden floor cushioned the sound of his footsteps and he could feel the heat of the palace slowly seeping into his stiff fingers, making him grateful for the shelter.
The room So had given him was large and tastefully furnished. It was his to stay in as long as he pleased, though he had found himself looking for more excuses to leave with the passing years.
Baek Ah peeled off his wet layers and set them aside for the servants to deal with. His limbs were weary. He hadn't travelled much lately, and while it was a distance that could be covered in a day, speed had come at the cost of his leg muscles.
I'm never drinking again, he thought, groaning as he bent down to pull off his wet socks. His head was aching.
He was already imagining his soft pillow, his eyelids growing heavy, when a loud voice ripped him from his daze.
"It's been months since her visit and you're still sulking?" It wasn't a flattering tone. The Queen's anger was painfully clear, even from down the hall.
"Leave me in peace," So sighed.
"It's pathetic!" Yeon-hwa continued, obviously indifferent to those who might overhear. "How will the kingdom thrive under such a weak leader?"
"How will my heir survive with a demon for a mother?" So snapped in reply. Baek Ah froze. It was unlike So to rise to the bait. He usually showed more restraint.
Careful, Yeon-hwa, Baek Ah thought. You've touched a nerve.
"Threatening guests with poison!" So's voice was laced with disgust. "Are you sure you're human?"
"Someone had to clean up your mess." Yeon-hwa said, sounding eerily calm, as though she'd simply swatted a fly.
There was a weighty silence, and Baek Ah knew, even without being able to see Yeon-hwa's face, that she immediately regretted her words.
"What did you say?" So's tone was measured and dangerously sharp.
"Let go! You're hurting me!" Panicked whimpers echoed down the hall.
"What did you do?"
There was a long pause. Baek Ah could picture So's grip twisting tighter, and it seemed an age before Yeon-Hwa finally relented. "You think I'd let any bastard compete for the throne?"
"You didn't…"
There was a crash of china.
Yeon-hwa yelped. "You'll harm the baby!"
Baek Ah pictured the rage in So's grasp. Would he actually hurt her?
So gave a furious cry. A door was thrown open and footsteps rushed down the hall.
"Baek Ah!" A fist pounded on his door. The shadow outside sounded desperate. Baek Ah didn't really have a choice. He slid the door open for So, who looked as pale as one who had just woken up to find himself in the underworld, with no memory of how he'd been mortally wounded.
"I think Yeon-hwa's done something… Something terrible." So's breathing was shallow, his face a ghastly shade of grey. "Was Soo with child?"
Baek Ah sat down. The time had finally come.
"She was." The words seemed to stick in his throat as he said them. Was . An awful thing, that word. A past with no future. A pathway with no continuance.
So's breath caught. "When?"
"Last winter. The baby died." Eun-ha. She would have been 100 days old by now.
"But why? What happened?" So was gripping the doorframe now, his knuckles white.
He doesn't want to believe it.
"I think you know."
Baek Ah had wanted to deliver the news gently, but his throat tightened with revulsion.
After everything Soo did for you - why couldn't you protect her?
So stumbled backwards, as though trying to escape the blow. "The letters! I knew something was wrong!" A strangled sound escaped his lips.
"No wonder she couldn't bear to look at me…" He was talking to himself now, wringing his hands with a frenzied expression. "I have to go to her. I have to explain."
"No." A cold voice split the air. Yeon-hwa was clutching a pillar, teeth bared in pain, her enormous belly straining beneath a scarlet robe. "I'm hours away from having this baby. You. Are. Not. Leaving!" She spat each word, neck stretched forward and veins bulging. It was a horrible image, like watching a shaman exorcise a spirit through ritual possession. Baek Ah was both appalled and transfixed.
"You're insane!" So said, spinning on his heel and starting down the hall towards the courtyard.
She's in labour, Baek Ah realised.
The pain briefly cleared from Yeon-hwa's face and she laughed. It was a manic sound, like someone on the edge of a breakdown. "I'm like this because of you! You just had to make it obvious in front of everyone, didn't you?" Her face twisted with hatred. "'I still love you'", she parroted. "You and your precious Soo-yah! You didn't give me a choice!" There was triumph in her voice.
Is she talking about that moment at the celebration?
So suddenly stopped walking and looked back, horror dawning on his face.
Oh Yeon-hwa, what have you done?
Another contraction seized her and she doubled over, hands balled into fists. As it passed she started laughing again.
"Go! Yes, run to her! You can apologise in person. But I'd be quick!" Yeon-hwa's eyes flashed as her lips pulled into a thin smile. "I hear that area is overrun with crime."
- Hae Soo -
The bed was unbelievably cosy. With each deep breath Soo could smell the soap she'd made for Jung, a citrus scent with subtle notes of thyme, and warm sunshine was kissing her hair. She was reluctant to open her eyes. With drowsy slowness she reached a hand to the other side of the mat, patting around, but when she didn't find the solid form she'd been expecting, she blinked and sat up. Jung was gone.
Sunlight was peeking through the shutters. She wrapped a blanket around her shoulders and padded to the door, spotting a sheet of parchment as she passed Jung's desk. It was a note.
You looked so peaceful - I didn't want to wake you. I'm needed in the village, but I'll be back later. Stay safe while I'm gone. Love, your dear husband.
She ran a finger over the word "Love".
He's never said that before, Soo thought, but then the memories of the previous night came back to her.
"This feels like a dream," he'd said, running a hand down her arm.
"A good one, I hope," Soo murmured, tucking her head against his shoulder.
He'd kissed the top of her head. "I never thought… I never dared to hope for this."
She remembered the way he'd looked at her after that song in the forest, and the way his eyes lit up whenever she was in a good mood.
I guess he has said it before, she realised. He's said it in a thousand ways.
Soo slipped into the clothes she'd worn the day before and was about to start pinning her hair when she caught sight of the reflection in Jung's mirror. For a second she didn't recognise the person in front of her. The flushed cheeks and cascading hair; the rosy lips and flawless skin; it was the face of someone who was not just healthy, but glowing. Her lips were drawn upwards with an inverse form of gravity. When had she last looked this happy? Had she ever? She suddenly couldn't be bothered with an elaborate hairstyle. She plucked a navy ribbon from Jung's bedside and pulled her hair into a ponytail.
It was hard to keep a bounce from her step as she headed towards the dining room. Min Jee was already waiting for her at the table, expression neutral as they greeted each other. Soo was immediately suspicious.
"Did you sleep well?" Soo asked, somewhat hesitant to open the floodgates.
"No. I didn't get to sleep for a long time," Min Jee said, lifting her eyes from the table and fixing Soo with an intent stare. "Jung broke a vase, and the sound gave me a horrible fright. I thought there might be an intruder in his room."
Soo squirmed a little in her seat. "Oh?"
"And the wind was also very loud." Min Jee continued, refusing to break eye contact. "It almost sounded like voices at times."
Soo ducked her head. "Really? I didn't hear that."
Min Jee raised an eyebrow. "You must have been very soundly asleep, my lady. When I knocked at your door to see if you were safe, you didn't even stir."
Soo pressed her lips together. "Mm. I slept extremely well."
The corner of Min Jee's mouth twitched. Soo wasn't imagining it. There was a definite twinkle in her eye. "I imagine I'd sleep well too if a strong wind was calling my name."
Soo spent most of the morning bored out of her mind. She tried to distract herself with sketching and reading, but her attention span was disastrously short, and her brain seemed fixated on only one thing. One person, to be precise.
She had already been back to Jung's room several times, partly to check that he hadn't returned early but also to reassure herself that her memories weren't the product of some fever dream. Jung's note was tucked in her pocket, but she had to restrain herself from pulling it out again. The paper was already becoming worn from the number of times she'd folded and unfolded it.
On Jung's desk she'd found a small notebook, with all the observations he'd jotted down about village life and the stories he'd gathered for her when she was sick. She'd resisted reading it at first, in case it was a diary, but after glancing at a few of the pages she convinced herself that it was more of an official record than a private journal, and so he probably wouldn't mind.
The exception was the poem he'd written. The one about Eun-ha. As she stared at the words she realised she wanted a copy of her own, so she pulled out some parchment and transcribed the poem in her own delicate calligraphy.
While she was waiting for the ink to dry, she pictured the shrine they'd visited the day before. Maybe the heavens listened after all.
Soo couldn't suppress the wild, giddy-making joy that bubbled up whenever she thought of Jung. This man whom she'd known for seven years, but had only really gotten to know recently. The way he looked at her. The way he said her name. And the trust. The feeling of safety. It made her bold; it made her feel like anything was possible again.
Whatever higher powers had led them to this point - she suddenly wanted to give thanks.
I should go back to the shrine. It was not a logical thought; she knew that much. But after so many painful years, it was hard to let go of the superstition that her joy would soon be crushed by misfortune.
Soo dressed in her riding hanbok and snuck past Min Jee's room. It didn't take long to saddle Nae-Cha, but she hesitated at the stable entrance.
I'll just go there and back as quickly as possible.
There was a break in the rain, but the sky was still smothered by dark clouds.
No one will be out in this weather, anyway.
A mean wind was whipping through the courtyard.
I'll take my bow, just in case.
Nae-Cha was not impressed by the dripping trees and muddy slope. Soo had been forced to dismount soon after entering the forest, because the path she'd previously taken with Jung was now littered with branches. Some areas had completely disappeared under a landslide of dirt.
Soo guided Nae-Cha around each obstacle, but after walking for several kilometres through the dimly lit trees, she realised there weren't any familiar landmarks. She wasn't lost, per se, but she was no longer confident about how to get to the shrine. Or home, for that matter.
"We need a better vantage point," she told Nae-Cha. The horse tossed her head in agreement.
Soo led them up a rise, aiming for the highest point she could see. It was tough going on the soft ground, her feet sinking deeply with each step and the cold earth sucking at her shoes. She was breathing heavily by the time they got to the top, but at least the workout had cleared her mind.
She gazed around the hillside beneath them. The power of the storm was impressive to behold. Trees were standing at unnatural angles, debris littered the forest floor, and what used to be small rivulets were now overflowing streams.
In the distance she could see a wooden structure. It had somehow survived the wind, though it looked small and flimsy from the height she was at.
"Come on, Nae-Cha." She started down the slope. "Where there's a hut, there's a path."
As they got further down the ridge, she could make out a clearing with some scattered signs of life. There was a fire pit and a wood pile, as well as some old pots and dishes.
A burst of colour moving through the trees made Soo stop short. Nae-Cha snorted behind her, clearly unhappy that their progress had halted.
Someone was walking towards the clearing. Squinting, Soo could make out a white and blue jacket under a long black cloak. The man's hood was pulled up, obscuring his face in shadow, but that wasn't the detail that made Soo uncomfortable. It was the clothes themselves. Even at a distance she could tell they were finely woven, and not at all in line with the shabby hut before them.
He doesn't belong here.
Soo pulled Nae-Cha behind a cluster of trees. "We don't want to bump into any murders," she whispered. She didn't think Nae-Cha was particularly concerned, but her own heart was suddenly racing as she reached into one of the saddle bags to retrieve her bow. The ridge she was following led away from the clearing, and the trees were growing thickly in this area. If she continued down the hill she might be able to slip away unnoticed.
She looked back towards the clearing. The man was entering the hut.
"Let's go," she tugged at Nae Cha's halter, suddenly eager to be gone.
They were further down the ridge, almost near the flat, when she felt the hairs on her neck prickle. She spun around to check they weren't being followed.
The hut was still visible through the trees, though from a lower angle. The front door was hanging open, and the person she'd seen earlier was backing out. He was dragging something heavy. Soo narrowed her eyes. Her mouth fell open in shock.
It was a body.
The hooded figure bent down and inspected the body thoroughly, patting along the victim's sides, rummaging through their clothes, and then stretching back to full height.
Soo had watched a lot of crime dramas in her past life. She wouldn't say she was obsessed, but she liked the problem solving aspect of those shows and had enjoyed stringing clues together until there was a clear explanation.
The scene in front of her made no sense. The hooded figure was well dressed and moving calmly. The body - a man by the looks of things - was stiff; his skin the sallow grey colour of the long departed.
Why would bandits target a place like this? It didn't look like there were any valuables around. And in any case, the hooded figure didn't fit the profile. An acquaintance, perhaps?
As she stared, the figure pushed back his cloak to retrieve something from his pocket, and she saw the gleam of a long sword hanging at his side. Silver and tortoiseshell - she'd recognise it anywhere.
Jung?
She took a step forward. Was he investigating another death?
Who would kill this poor man in the middle of nowhere?
Jung was still examining the body. He'd pulled out a notebook and was making notes. Soo gazed around the surrounding forest, thoroughly confused. "No murder without motive." It was the tagline of her favourite show.
There's really nothing out here, she thought, until a small movement caught her eye. She squinted. It was like tracking the progress of smoke through the night sky. The shape was so camouflaged, so subtle, she felt sure she'd lose it if she blinked. It seemed to both fly and creep, hurtling towards Jung down the slope. And there, in its wake, another shape was trailing. A duplicate shadow, only a few metres behind, dressed entirely in black and clutching a long blade.
An ambush.
After so many years in Goryeo, the sight was both terrifying and familiar. Of course, Soo's weary mind whispered, it always comes back to this.
It was hard to tell, in those dizzying seconds of slow-motion horror, whether her stillness was a product of calm or shock, but she knew to her core what was coming next.
The men were running straight at Jung, swords raised.
Jung was facing the wrong way, his attention still fixed on the body.
He won't see them in time.
It was too late to call out a warning. Even if Soo screamed, Jung would only look up - not behind.
The men had nearly reached him, and for a second she tried to squeeze her eyes shut to block out the images to come.
The blood. The endless blood... I can't take it!
Nae-Cha sensed the danger and whinnied sharply, breaking up Soo's thoughts for a moment. Through a haze of panic Soo could hear Baek Ah's words.
"Eyes open, Soo-yah."
She glanced down. Her hand was still wrapped around the bow. In a reflex born from countless hours of practice, she drew forth an arrow and notched it in place. Then, with a single grounding breath, she raised her arms and let the arrow fly.
It flew in a perfect line, soaring straight across the clearing and thudding into the first man's chest as easily as it had pierced straw targets.
I hit him. For someone who had never even hit a bird, the realisation that she'd struck a person was horrifying, but she didn't have time to dwell on it.
What happened next was a blur of fabric and limbs. The first figure, stopped short by Soo's arrow, let out a strangled cry as he toppled forward, face crunching into the dirt. Jung, hearing the cry, spun on heels and drew his sword, raising it just in time to block the blade of the second man who had closed the distance between them.
One on one in a sword fight, Jung was unrivalled. He parried and swung with graceful precision, his movements measured, as though it were dance. The abruptness of the attack and the shock he must have felt were barely noticeable in his reaction, and it wasn't long before he had the upper hand. With a final swing Jung cut the stranger down, then cast around the clearing, looking for the source of the arrow.
Soo's eyes had flown back to the hill, where new shapes were passing through the trees.
There's more! And they have horses!
"Jung!" Soo shouted. He spun around sharply, face suddenly pale with fear. She pointed up the hill. "Run!"
Jung's eyes locked on the distant riders, and he didn't need telling twice. Ducking under branches and sidestepping logs, he sprinted down the hill towards her.
Soo stuffed her bow in the saddle bag and pulled herself onto Nae-Cha's back, arms shaking with adrenaline.
The same hazards that had slowed her earlier progress were now hampering the riders on the hill. Even with bows, they can't reach us yet. They're too far off.
"Soo-yah!" Jung shouted as he leapt past the final few obstacles. "Pass me the reins!" She held them out, and he pulled himself up in front of her. "Hold on to me tightly," he said. "We'll need to go fast. It will be harder to balance." He sounded so calm and in control, as though it were simply another riding lesson. "Yah!" He shouted then, urging Nae-Cha forward.
The horse could undoubtedly sense their fear. Nae-Cha's ears flicked back and forth as they picked their way through the remaining trees, the ground too treacherous for any decent speed. Soo clutched Jung's waist, trying to mimic his movements for greater balance, but it was hard to feel confident with so little visibility. She couldn't see anyone over her shoulder, but she knew for certain they were still following.
It was a trap. She thought of the reports Jung had received from the village. But why target him?
When they reached open ground Nae-Cha broke into a run. The clouds were still thick above them. It couldn't have been later than mid afternoon, but already the light was growing dim. The fields that had seemed so magical a few weeks before now felt dangerously exposed.
We just need to get home, Soo thought. Then we can raise the alarm.
She squeezed her arms tighter around Jung's waist.
They were nearing the river when the first arrow whistled by. Soo felt the wind of its tail feathers brush past her ponytail, missing her by inches. Jung turned back to check on her, horror plain across his face, then lifted his eyes, searching for the source.
Another arrow flew past, burying itself in a tree up ahead of them. It was then that Jung pulled sharply on the reins, forcing Nae-Cha to break her stride and turn.
But that's the direction they're coming from! Why would he -
Jung cried out as a third arrow bit into his leg. Soo felt her vision contract.
There's an arrow. In his thigh.
Nae-Cha tossed her head and whinnied as Jung lurched forward, losing his grip on reins.
No-no-no-no-no-no-no. Panicked thoughts were filling Soo's head. She tried to block them out.
The arrow can be removed. There are doctors.
But before she could convince herself further, another arrow thudded into Jung's shoulder.
No-no-no-no-no-no-no-no-no.
A horrible groan escaped Jung's lips and he started falling to one side. Soo pulled sharply at his waist to correct his balance. "No! Stay on! We're so close!"
"Soo-yah," Jung said, and his voice no longer sounded calm. "You'll be faster without me." There was a desperation to his tone.
"Don't say that! I need you." Her vision was becoming blurry with tears. She blinked them away furiously.
She reached past Jung to grab the reins, urging Nae-Cha forward. There was a copse of trees by the river. They could hide there for a while. Find help.
She would get them there.
I can.
I will.
It seemed like they were going to make it until, just a few metres before their goal, a hand reached out and grabbed Jung's cloak, pulling him off to one side. Nae-Cha felt the weight on her back suddenly shift, saw the shadow of the assailant and squealed; a piercing, desperate sound. The horse spun in a jagged circle, nearly throwing Soo to the ground. Jung's foot was still caught in the stirrup, and he was dragged hopelessly through the dirt, like a puppet in a horror show.
The man who had grabbed Jung was knocked backwards, dropping his sword somewhere among the weeds. He was a similar build to Jung, but with a chilling look in his eyes. He turned to Soo, a resigned expression on his face, and reached up to grab her. Soo kicked at him, a scream coming from deep inside her chest, her right hand fumbling at her belt. The man clawed at her leg, trying to find purchase.
You. Won't. Get me.
Soo's fingers curled around metal and without pausing, she pulled free Jung's knife and plunged it into the man's chest. There was an awful crunching sound as metal hit bone. The man gaped and stumbled backwards, staring at the knife as though he'd never contemplated being on the receiving end. He toppled to the ground with a gurgle.
"Jung!" Soo cried, craning over the horse's side to see his face. She tried to free his foot, pulling at the stirrup in the hopes of twisting it loose, but another arrow landed with a sickening thud, this time in Nae-Cha's neck.
There was a squeal and a scream, and suddenly Soo was on the ground. Her breath was knocked clean from her chest, and she lay there for a moment, stunned and wheezing, before the hopeless realisation hit her.
This is the end.
I don't want it to be the end.
It took every ounce of willpower to pull herself up.
Nae-Cha, driven wild by pain and fear, had bolted towards the river and skidded down the bank. She was lying on her side, panting heavily, her eyes wide and glassy. The sight pierced Soo's heart.
My beautiful... What have they done to you? But she couldn't stop and help. She needed to find Jung.
Soo staggered down the muddy bank, reeds jabbing at her legs. The area around Nae-Cha was clear. Had Jung crawled free? The light was growing dimmer, as though the sun were setting hours early, and Soo squinted through the dimness.
The man who had grabbed her was lying motionless on his back, and she could see riders approaching on the horizon, but there was no sign of Jung. She was running out of time.
"Jung!" Her cries were muffled by the rushing of the river. The rain had caused its waters to swell, and it surged at the bank in violent bursts.
She could hear someone calling her name from far off, but she ignored it. She stumbled further down the bank, clutching at the long grass to stop herself from falling.
"Soo!" The voice was getting louder. It was then that she spotted Jung. He was clinging to a branch downstream, water churning around him as he struggled to keep his head from going under.
"Soo!" The voice had almost reached her now. She looked up.
Her heart dropped.
It was So.
He was standing at the top of the bank, staring down at her with undisguised panic. His arm was stretched out towards her, as though he could pluck her from the danger in an instant, if only she would give him her hand.
He's here. He actually came. A year ago Soo would have been thrilled. Back then it was all she had dreamed of; but now the scene was all wrong. He wasn't the one she wanted to see there, standing safe on high ground.
The terror in So's eyes; it was the look of someone who was about to lose the only thing they'd ever held dear, and Soo could recognise it, because it was everything she was feeling in that moment.
She turned back to Jung. His grip was slipping on the branch, head falling dangerously low in the water, and the sky was almost black now. In a few seconds she would lose sight of him completely.
"All we have is what we choose."
As she stepped towards the water, she threw a final glance over her shoulder.
The danger from the palace had found them, but she knew it wasn't So's fault.
I'm sorry, she thought, hoping So could read the message in her eyes.
So's expression twisted, a wordless cry forming on his lips.
Soo couldn't pause to hear what he might say. She plunged into the river, kicking out in the direction of the branch. The current was fierce; the water brown and littered with debris. She knew it was hopeless almost immediately, but it was too late to turn back.
Jung had lost his grip and was sinking beneath the waterline. Soo kicked with all her strength, the heavy fabric of her clothes dragging her down, but the current carried her closer until she'd finally reached him.
She grabbed Jung's arm as his head slipped beneath the surface, grasping at the branch he'd been holding to keep them in place. He was too heavy. She was swallowing too much water.
If I can just hold him a while longer, someone will rescue us.
There was a sickening crack as the low-hanging branch broke free from the tree.
Soo's head was suddenly under.
They were both under.
The world was black.
"Why did you still like me after all those years?" Soo had asked Jung the night before.
"I couldn't help it. It didn't matter where I went… You were the only one I saw."
Soo's hand tightened around the fabric of Jung's sleeve, and as the water pressed down, she was glad she could spend a few more moments by his side.
"Just don't go anywhere." He'd told her from the other side of the pillow. "I've grown helplessly dependent." Then he'd kissed her nose, beaming at her through thick lashes.
Perhaps it didn't matter, in the end, how fleeting happiness could be. She'd do it all again, just to see that smile.
I choose him, she thought.
And then, like a candle flickering out, there were no thoughts left at all.