The night spoke with the sound of a thousand creatures – the caws and squawks of raptors and pterosaurs, the unearthly cries of anonymous predators. Nikolai Koshkin had done the night shift many, many times – he had learned. He had somewhere he needed to be.

Eventually, Nikolai turned the corner and walked into the mammoth barns at Ice Age Mount. As he entered, he saw the section Martha and Ellie were being kept in – the two mammoth sisters were kept separate from the herd for now. However, plans to properly integrate them were being drawn up - they needed to be with a herd.

The female mammoth was looking around, quaking like a tree in a windstorm – only having just woken up. According to Jack, Martha and Ellie had been having these little "episodes" since they'd been brought back – Martha in particular. Once Nikolai had found out, he had taken to checking on them at night and providing support for the two mammoths. At his arrival, Martha turned her head and rumbled warmly at him, as if giving him a welcome. Smiling, Nikolai said, quietly, "Did you have another 'episode' again?" Martha's silence was almost an affirmative.

Regarding the mammoth, Nikolai said, silently, "I know what it's like, you know – to suffer in life. Loss has been following me for years - it's been a constant companion." The mammoth gave him a confused look – sighing, Nikolai elaborated, and the truth came pouring out, "I don't remember my father – he died when I was barely two years old. A sniper's bullet, ironically enough. My mother died when I was seventeen – she was run over by a drunk driver, when she was walking across the road. After that… for four years, it was me and my sister. But then…" He trailed off, not wanting to talk any further, as Martha let out a rumble of sympathy.

At this, Nikolai sighed and continued, "And then my sister… died", almost choking the words out, as the invocation of the memory came dancing back. He continued, the hurt coming back in his voice, mixed with a tinge of anger, "I was in some Central Asian hellhole – far away – when it happened. She was abducted one day whilst walking down the road. Three days later, they found her dead in a drain, raped and murdered. The bastards had dragged her into an alley, had… their way with her and when they were done, slit her throat and dumped her for the rats." He paused, before continuing, with a note of pain and guilt in his voice, "I didn't find out until a week later, when I came home and she wasn't there."

At this, he looked back at Martha, a haunted expression on his face "And there I was, alone in the world at twenty-one. And, since, then, I've lost every friend I've ever had – they died. All of them." Looking over at Ellie, he said, softly, to Martha, "At least you and Ellie have each other." The mammoth looked at her sleeping sister, before turning back to Nikolai, an expression of sympathy on her face.

Nikolai sighed and almost chuckled, "Anyway, not everything's about me. You were dreaming about them again, weren't you?". The mammoth's silence was almost an affirmative – at this, Nikolai sighed, "I can't get angry at them. I can't hate them. I may be many things, but a hypocrite is not one of them. I, myself, used to kill." Martha turned to look at him, almost surprised at his statement. Nikolai sighed, "It was what I did – what I was trained to do. And I was good at what I did… too good. 101/89 – 101 confirmed kills, with and 89 unconfirmed. I'm always aware of that figure. Its weight hangs above me every day "

Martha looked at him, almost sadly at this, as if noticing the weight of his regret. "I suppose, in some twisted way, they could be admirable; in their motivations, if not their deeds. They went after you… they hurt you because they were trying to survive themselves. They had some reason for doing it; forgive them for that much. The only reason I have for my killings is that their lives were my orders… which isn't a good reason. They say the worst things in human history were done by people 'just following orders'. And that's true. In the end... I couldn't take it anymore - so I left and found a place where I could wallow in my own self-loathing, waiting for my life to end... but then I met someone who saw the best in everyone, even in me."

The mammoth let out a low bellow – from such an awe-inspiring creature, it was very weak, almost plaintive. At this, Nikolai gave her a pained look. "It gets easier", Nikolai said, "Every day, it gets a little easier. But you have to go through it every day – that's the hard part. And I'd be lying if it stopped hurting, it never will – but it does get easier.". Nikolai placed his hand on the mammoth's massive forehead and her trunk flopped over his shoulder. The mammoth's eyes were sad, but empathetic – despite her own pain, she knew that his was equally as important.

At this, Nikolai smiled – in a way, he and Martha were quite alike. The world had been unkind to them both – it had left them both broken, hurting. But, just as the world had broke them, it had also saved them – it had brought them to a place where they could heal their wounds. It had brought them companionship. They said a burden shared, was a burden halved – and he and Martha could share each other's burdens.

Nikolai sighed. Perhaps it was time he came clean about himself, not just to Martha, but to the two people he had come to care about more than anyone else in his life. They deserved to know about himself.

. . . . .

"Why'd you call us here?"

Nikolai smiled as Jack and Collete walked around, looking completely confused. Nikolai said, quietly, "To chat. There are some things I have to tell you." Jack said, quietly, "Nikolai… you're scaring us. What do you want to tell us? At this, Nikolai sighed – and told them everything – about his family, about how his parents had died… and what had happened to his sister.

After Nikolai had finished, Jack, tears in his eyes, ran up to Nikolai and gave him a hug – a few seconds later, Collete joined in. Nikolai briefly tensed up before responding stiffly to them, as if uncertain as to what to do.

Jack said, through tears, "You're not alone, Nikolai. Not anymore. You have us now. We're your family now." At this, Collete nodded and Martha rumbled in affirmative. At this, Nikolai smiled, "Thank you, Denham. Thank you, all three of you."

BTW, I cried when I wrote this. I hope this has just as much an impact on you.

And this is the big plunge into Nikolai's backstory, as well as giving him some time bonding with Martha - Nikolai and Martha are going to have one of the closest bonds of any in this story, so we needed to establish that connection.

As well as this, it's a change to see the usually taciturn Nikolai get a long monologue.