If you're still here, I'm so glad. I have no excuse for being absolutely lazy during quarantine! I should've been writing all the time. Please enjoy this update. It's a little shorter than usual, but I just wanted to get something out there. I so enjoy writing this fic so I hope you're still enjoying reading it.
Chapter Forty-Seven (Mareke)
I sat in the saddle miserably as Shuk bounced in front of me excitedly. It was the first year he had been included in his brother's birthday ride, but I could not enjoy the experience we were sharing as a family. I was too lost in thoughts of taking Adnan to Harad in exactly a year.
"Mareke," Aragorn said as he pulled back to ride even with me. There was a warning in his voice. I knew he was instructing me not to ruin my son's day.
I plastered a smile on my face.
"I think we shall picnic here!" Adnan declared when we came upon a clearing near a babbling brook.
"This is a lovely spot," I agreed. I stayed in the saddle as Aragorn and Adnan tied Brego and Fahall to a low hanging limb at the edge of the clearing. Both my son and his stallion had grown so much in the past couple of years.
Aragorn approached me and I handed him our youngest before sliding down to the forest floor. I unhooked the saddle bags that contained our picnic lunch and Adnan helped me lay down the blanket.
"Are you excited for tonight?" Aragorn asked Adnan.
The boy nodded eagerly. It was the first time he was having a celebration that included anyone besides our closest friends. It was still to be a small celebration with only a handful of noblemen and Aragorn's councilors in attendance who had young children of their own. More and more Adnan had been making friends throughout the city.
Aragorn had decided to put a group of the young boys into tactical lessons with Adnan and if it was possible, the boy had begun to enjoy riding, archery and swordplay even more than he had when it was just him in the lessons.
"Eat something," I bid Shuk who was toddling around the perimeter of the blanket, dodging mine and his father's hands.
"Gotcha!" Aragorn exclaimed when he snatched the toddler off of his feet and onto his lap. Shuk squealed with laughter as Aragorn tickled his chubby belly.
I could not help but smile at the sight of them. They were a near identical pair.
I reached over to hand Shuk a hunk of cheese, but he turned his face into his father's chest.
"Oh come now," Aragorn chided him. "Do you not want to be big and strong like your brother?"
I watched Adnan's face flush from the praise.
It was the exact right thing to say though. Shuk wanted nothing more than to be grown up like Adnan. He followed his older brother everywhere, he tried to mimic everything he said and did and he threw the worst fits when he was unable to follow Adnan to a lesson or a get together of his peers and friends.
Shuk took the cheese from me and nibbled on it. He then took some bread, but his greatest delight of all was when Adnan took a small knife out of his boot and began paring an apple, handing small pieces to his brother.
After everyone had eaten their fill, Aragorn stood up. "It looks like there is a nice deep spot over there and I could really use an after lunch swim."
Adnan was on his feet immediately and they both pulled their shirts off. Shuk leapt up even though he did not seem to understand what was going on. He was struggling to pull his own clothes off, but he fell hard on his bottom when his shirt got stuck on his head.
I crawled toward him and helped him out of all of his clothes. He thought about crying, but then realized his father and brother had already taken off for the creek. He went hurrying after them and I followed slowly behind. The guards had long since gotten used to seeing the naked Crown Prince running around.
Adnan went crashing into the water, giving a whoop as he went. In early June, I imagined it was not very warm.
Aragorn turned and scooped Shuk onto his hip before barrelling into the water as well.
"Mother! Join us!" Adnan yelled.
I shook my head and settled myself on the grassy bank.
"But it is my birthday!" he exclaimed with a grin.
"The snows have barely melted," I returned. "I was made for warm water."
Adnan just laughed and shook his head, turning back to his father and brother. Shuk was lurching all around in his father's arms and I could see his teeth chattering from the cold, but he showed no sign of wanting to get out of the water.
My smile slowly slipped into a frown. I tried to remember the last time Adnan had called me "Mama" instead of "Mother." I could not put my finger on the exact moment he had grown out of it.
Just as I felt my eyes beginning to well with tears, Aragorrn set Shuk on the bank of the creek and he came running toward me in all his naked glory. He crashed into me hard, laughing wildly the whole time.
"You are absolutely freezing!" I exclaimed, wrapping him in my arms.
His hair was sticking up all over the place and his lips were a pale shade of blue, but he seemed to have enjoyed himself.
"Come you two," I called over my shoulder as I stood and headed back for the horses. "This is not a normal birthday in our chambers. A few things still need to be tended to."
Adnan groaned as he stepped out of the water.
"You are the one who wanted a bigger party this year," Aragorn reminded him with a chuckle as he trailed us all.
I used the picnic blanket to dry Shuk off before attempting to get his damp body back into his clothes. It was not a pleasant experience for either of us.
When everyone was somewhat dry and dressed, I mounted my horse and took Shuk from Aragorn.
We got many stares as we rode back through the city. Aragorn's hair was still soaked and dripping onto his tunic as was Adnan's and Shuk's. I could feel a wet spot on the front of my dress from the curls of my youngest.
We climbed the levels of the city and when we reached ours, I bid Aragorn take the boys back to our rooms to start having their baths. I made my way to the kitchens to check on the food preparations. Adnan's favorite cook was more friendly than usual as she knew she was making the big meal for the little boy she had always been soft for.
I then made my way to the hall we would be using. It was smaller than the great hall we normally occupied, but still quite spacious and would provide plenty of room for the night's festivities.
"There you are!"
I turned as I closed the doors to the hall behind me and was faced with Eowyn with Finduilas on her hip.
"Where is the rest of your family?" I asked, squeezing Finduilas' bare foot and giving her a smile.
"I left them with your boys. They said you were still working on things for tonight so I thought us girls would come and see if you could use any help."
"You know, I think we are-" I stuttered in the middle of my sentence when Eowyn readjusted Finduilas, pulling her dress across her midsection, which was quite visibly rounded. "I think we are ready to go," I finished faintly.
"I did not want to write to you," she said quietly.
"Why ever not? I am so happy for you," I said, though I was sure my voice wasn't convincing.
"Mareke," she began.
"I need to get ready for tonight," I said quickly, my voice catching in my throat. I turned on my heel quickly and headed back towards our rooms. I stood outside the door for a moment, gathering myself so I would not have to explain to Aragorn what was the matter.
"Everything is just about ready for tonight!" I called brightly, stepping into the sitting room. Aragorn, Adnan and Shuk came out from the nursery. They looked much better than they had after their dip in the stream. "You all look so handsome."
They were all in some ensemble of navy blue and grey.
"You just missed Faramir and Elboron," Aragorn said.
"That is a shame. I am going to get ready and then it should be about time for the celebrations to start." I stepped toward Aragorn and kissed his stubbled cheek. I wanted to linger in his arms, no longer wanting to attend the festivities at all, but I knew neither of those things were an option. "Can you handle them for another hour or so?"
"Of course I can. Take your time."
I had the tub filled for me and then I asked to be left alone.
As soon as the door closed behind the servant, my body was wracked with sobs. I cried so hard I could not breath. It seemed there would never be a respite from the blows I was receiving.
"Your Majesty are you-"
I did not hear the door open or Lady Ioreth enter. She hurried to the side of the tub, actually dropping to her knees. "Your Majesty! What is the matter?"
I covered my face with my hands. "The Lady of Ithilien...she is...expecting once more," I finally managed to get out.
"Oh Your Majesty." Lady Ioreth reached for the plush towel that was waiting for me. "Oh you poor thing. Let us get you out of there and dried off." The woman actually wrapped me in the towel and held me close for a moment.
Once she had realized that our family would not be like others that she had worked for, she had warmed to us considerably and had even grown to enjoy the freedom our lives offered her. She had been with me through every aspect of my life in Gondor and if felt right to have her there comforting me then.
She squeezed my upper arms and then walked to the door, poking her head out so no one would see me. "Send for a cup of the tea that the Queen favors and bring me a basin of the coldest water you can find. Knock on her bedchamber door when you are back."
Once the servants had dispersed for their tasks, she entered my bedchamber and came back with a plush robe.
I felt no shame for her to be tending to me in such a way. She had been dressing me and tending to me for years.
Lady Ioreth wrapped me in the robe and tied it around my flat midsection before taking me into my bedchamber. She bid me to lay down.
"We have plenty of time to get you ready, so you just relax for a bit."
I had not been tired until I had seen Eowyn, but lying there I felt completely drained.
Lady Ioreth left me in my bed as she bustled around the room preparing my dress and jewels for the evening.
When there was a knock at the door she took a tray from the serving woman who had been sent to fetch the tea and water.
She sat next to me once more and pressed a cold rag over my eyes. "We do not want you looking puffy at your son's birthday celebration," she said gently. It felt marvelous after I had gotten so heated from the bath and the crying.
With my eyes covered I felt as though Lady Ioreth could not see me either and so I was inclined to speak freely to her. "Why does this keep happening to me?"
I heard her sigh. "I cannot say, Your Majesty. I know it is hard, but you cannot get discouraged. These things happen in their own time. I have served several women who were older than you and still bearing children."
It was my turn to sigh. "I know you are right, but this is slowly killing me."
"I have known you for a while now and have seen every challenge this life has brought to you in the last few years. This will not kill you." She came back to the side of the bed and removed the rag. "Good as new. We should get you dressed and ready."
I nodded, bolstered by her kind words. I moved so I was sitting at the vanity. Her gentle application of my makeup and her fingers in my hair lulled me into a state of relaxation.
"I think you should wear your hair down," Lady Ioreth suggested.
"That would be quite scandalous. I have never done that outside of Harad." I raised an eyebrow at her reflection in the mirror.
She shrugged her shoulders. "Hair down would be the least of your scandals since arriving here."
A laugh burst from my lips. "You are quite right!"
ooooOoooo
"Lady Ioreth, you forgot to do the Queen's hair," Aragorn said with a smile when we both exited the bedchamber.
Shuk toddled over to me and reached his arms up, wanting to be held.
"I am beginning to enjoy these small rebellions, Your Majesty," Lady Ioreth replied. "You all enjoy yourself tonight." She squeezed my arm lightly before she departed.
"I quite like it," Aragorn said, wrapping an arm around my waist and pulling me close. "Lead the way, birthday boy," he bid Adnan.
Everyone was already gathered when we made it to the hall. Music was playing softly in the background and the wafting scent of the food lent a cozy atmosphere.
A gaggle of children all hurried up to Adnan and the practiced clumsy bows and curtsies to him. He may not have been their prince, but he was still royalty in his own home. I was pleased to see that he seemed uncomfortable rather than arrogant with the proceedings. He waved them away and the group immediately took off to enjoy their evening.
The remaining three of us went to the high table and enjoyed our dinner. Occasionally, Adnan would dart into view, but for the most part he was on his own with his friends.
"Surely he will eat something," I said, a bit concerned.
"Adnan? Have you ever seen him miss a meal?" Aragorn asked with a chuckle.
After the meal, the music started up in earnest and out of nowhere Adnan was at my side.
"Mother, would you start the dancing with me?" he asked, holding a hand out to me.
"I cannot turn you down on your birthday. Nor would I want to." I placed my hand in his and left Shuk fussing with his father.
There was not a large height difference between Adnan and I any longer. I realized how much he had grown in the last year as I put my hand on his shoulder.
I had to choke back tears as my son actually guided me around the floor, as though he were already a man grown.
"Have you been practicing?" I asked.
"A little," he admitted. "Strider said I should."
"It is quite impressive." I had to refrain from putting my fingers in his curls and embarrassing him with too much affection in front of his friends.
When the song was over, we were met at the edge of the dancefloor by Aragorn and Shuk, Faramir and Eowyn and their children, and Beinion, Vanya, Marilla and Brennil, their newest addition.
A few weeks past, we had gone to the naming ceremony for Beinion and Vanya's second daughter, though we had not been named her godparents.
"That was lovely," Vanya said. "And I very much enjoy your hair tonight," she said with a smile. "Perhaps I will wear mine unbound to the next celebration."
"Vanya," Beinion said, shaking his head.
I moved closer to Vanya and peered into the bundle she held. It pained me to do so, but I did not want to seem out of character. I had been pretending at joy for others for so long it was almost second nature.
"You are lucky she sleeps so well," I said.
"It is what I am owed," Vanya laughed. "This one never slept." She tickled Marilla's foot who was propped on her father's hip.
"Neither of mine did," Eowyn said.
"Well perhaps you will have better luck this time," Vanya said optimistically.
Eowyn's eyes darted to me and I felt Aragorn shift to look at her. "Oh. It would seem congratulations are in order," he said. I did not think anyone else could have detected the change in his tone.
"Thank you," Eowyn said, smiling at Aragorn, but keeping her eyes on me.
Over her shoulder, I saw Legolas and Gimli approaching along with the Elrondian twins.
They had lingered after healing Shuk and I think in part they knew I was afraid for them toleave and have something bad happen to my family with no one there to help. They had spent a great deal of time with Aragorn counselling him and I knew he was grateful for their wisdom. They had made no mention of their plans to leave and I knew my family was glad of their presence.
"Just the man I was looking for," I said to Gimli. "Would you walk with me to get a goblet of wine?"
"Of course, lass," he said with a smile.
"Is the Queen alright?" I heard Faramir ask my husband. I did not linger to hear his response.
"I think I would like to get a little drunk tonight."
"Is everything alright?"
"No. Not in the slightest. This is my son's last birthday here with his friends and family," I replied as Gimli handed me a goblet of wine. I downed it in one go and held my hand out for another. "There are babies all around me and I cannot, for the life of me, have another one even as the Realm demands I do."
Gimli glanced at the maid who was serving the ale and wine.
"Let them talk. It is all they have done since my arrival."
"Perhaps we should get some air on the terrace," Gimli suggested.
I set my second empty goblet on the table and reached for a third before I let Gimli lead me away.
I rarely drank and if I did, I had no more than one goblet of wine at a time so the two went to my head immediately, but I continued to sip on the third.
Gimli got me sitting safely on a bench away from the entrance of the terrace, but he seemed uncertain what to do next.
"Might we have a moment with the Queen?" someone asked.
I glanced up and in my haze saw Elladan and Elrohir.
"Of course," Gimli said quickly, eager to get away from my unusually foul mood.
A twin sat on either of my sides, but neither said anything.
Finally, I spoke. "You can see the future as your father could. That is how you knew that Arathorn needed you."
"It does not work how you want it to," Elladan said gently.
"We cannot just call it up and ask for what you wish to see," Elrohir added. "We have no control over when it comes to us."
I sighed and took a long drink from my goblet.
"You will be travelling to Harad next year for Adnan's birthday. Perhaps we should go back and enjoy this celebration instead of lingering in the future," Elladan suggested.
"You do not want Adnan to be missing you." Elrohir took the goblet from my hand and drew me to my feet.
"Feeling better?" Gimli asked when we returned to the group.
"Much. Thank you." I smiled at everyone. "This smaller hall gets hotter faster."
"Ah, but are you not used to the heat?" Aragorn asked.
"Not anymore," I said with a laugh. Everyone seemed to relax then. "I have been spoiled by these northern seasons."
"If you are up to it, you should dance with me," Aragorn said. "All of the little ones have been taken to bed."
I obliged and let him take me onto the dance floor. Graciously, he said nothing about the scent of wine I was sure I was putting off.
"Did you know about Eowyn?" he asked quietly.
"Not until I ran into her this afternoon."
Aragorn pressed his forehead to mine.
"It gets harder instead of easier," I said.
"We have discussed this," he replied. "Our happiness and fulfillment does not rest on having another child."
"I am not sure that is true."
"It may have to be." Aragorn pressed a kiss to my forehead and spun me away from him before pulling me back into his chest.
I gave a resolute nod and we made our way off of the floor.
We stayed up far too late, chatting and laughing with our friends.
Vanya was entertaining us all with tales of Beinion being father to two daughters.
I was relaxed against Aragorn's chest where we all sat at a round table.
Adnan darted by and Aragorn caught his arm. "You are up far too late, birthday boy." We all rose and bid our friends good night before heading back to our chambers.
"Do you want me to tuck you in?" I asked, when we entered the sitting room.
Adnan shook his head and I nodded. Instead of going with him, I wrapped him tightly in my arms and inhaled the scent of his little boy sweat.
"I love you. More than you will ever understand."
"Mother," he groaned.
I laughed lightly. "No one is here to see you embarrassed," I promised. "Get some sleep." I nudged him toward his room. "You had a long day."
I watched him until the door was closed behind him and then I made my way to my own bedchamber.
By the time Lady Ioreth had helped me undress and wash my face, Aragorn was already in bed.
I crawled across the middle of the bed and snuggled against his side. He stroked my back lightly and I began to kiss his neck and earlobe.
"Mareke, I am exhausted," he murmured.
I continued to kiss him and ran my hand over his chest and stomach, not getting the reaction I was hoping for.
"As am I, but.." I trailed off.
"Seeing Eowyn and Brennil is not a good reason," Aragorn said, irritation rising in his voice.
"Then what is?"
"I do not know. You wanting to enjoy yourself!"
"Fine! Then I want to enjoy myself!"
Aragorn forcefully removed my hand and rolled onto his side. "Not tonight, Mareke."
There you go! I hope you enjoyed this! We'll be moving out of this phase for the royal family soon enough so don't worry! If you'd like to review, I would so appreciate it! I'm still open to any headcanons you have for this lovely family!
Happy reading,
Avonmora