Chapter 49
Part 2 - added 12/23/2023
Part 1 - 11/22/2023
Each breath is quicker than the last. Each step makes the next one more difficult. Each movement makes the pain worse. But as much as it hurts, everything else feels better than 2 months ago. The sunny blue sky along with the fully bloomed trees and the peacefulness of this place brought back the familiarity, the normality, the way everything should- "uhh…sss"
"Kato! no!" Nadia commanded but failed to get Kato to stop chasing the squirrel. Running after it is definitely a bad idea. Waiting for it to come back didn't take long but long enough to misunderstand why it came running back barking. Thank goodness it listens to Amy and thank goodness that guy is smart enough to run not walk. "Who's that?"
"no one"
No one could mean it's just another guy looking for a date but what was he apologizing for? "What does he want?"
"nothing, just talking"
That could be true. That guy could be apologizing for bothering her after getting rejected. But it's daytime not night time. Kato doesn't bark at strangers unless it thinks they're a threat. "Do you know him?" Nadia asked, knowing how crazy it is to think that Kato would understand but getting 1 bark could mean that it does. Dogs are smart. Cocoa was the same way, barking to indicate yes. "Is he a bad guy?" It might not recognize him but dogs do have powerful sense of smell. Two barks is a definite yes. "I think we should follow him." He's very far away but it's not too late. "He could be stalking us." It's not impossible so why doesn't she think so? Even Kato wants to.
"Stop…sss, Kato, sit"
Just like Cocoa, Kato seems to be a sensitive one too. It's moaning like it's apologizing for earlier. Holding on to the leash earlier might have injured her palm but it didn't injure her knee so why does she need to sit down on the bench like an elderly. "you okay?"
"Yeaa, just sore"
For someone who jogs every morning, knee pain is inevitable. Leg pain is too. But if it hurts, then why was she jogging earlier, not fast but still. "Let me see" Nadia said, then realized she was right after Amy tried to prevent her from looking at her leg. This time, it's not difficult to tell that Amy is hiding something since she's wearing long pants in this 80 degree weather which didn't seem odd before but now does. Fear of getting sunburn and attracting creeps are logical but those aren't the only reasons. "What happened?"
(Sigh) The scratches on the palm and the bruise on the knee can be explained with a simple lie but the bandage around the leg would be difficult. Amy had no intention of letting anyone know but now there is a reason to let Nadia know in case she lets Lucy know. Accidents happen but Lucy might not see it that way since she's the one who wanted to take Kato back from Uncle Nick because having a dog adds to the security. It's not Kato's fault but she's still not sure how it started. A walk around the neighborhood suddenly turned into a dog fight. Kato also got bitten but wasn't seriously hurt. The apology from the owner a moment ago was to make sure no police report was filed and he's not getting sued since his dog wasn't on a leash and he couldn't control his dog. "so don't tell her, she will break his leg and she'll kill his dog."
"But…this is just, she wouldn't."
"It's not a chihuahua. It's an infected Cujo." That's exaggerated but it is a dangerous guard dog that Lucy will have no regrets on killing it. "And she will blame herself"
It is crazy to think that Lucy would. That's because Nadia doesn't know about Ezz. Not much is known about her since Lucy refused to talk about it other than taking the blame for her death. But Faith knows, not much but she knows that Ezz is Lucy's forgotten ex and she passed away during an unsuccessful brain surgery that is no fault of Lucy's. But Lucy blamed herself for not remembering her because if she had a year ago, she would've been able to get her the best surgeons. The delay of treatment made it worse. That's true but who's to say that the outcome wouldn't be the same? It was Ezz who chose not to do anything about it because her mother had the same illness. Surgery and chemotherapy couldn't heal her mother. It was Ezz who knew that some day she could die like her mother did so she chose to spend more time with her son rather than take the risk. It was Ezz who chose not to tell her brother until she could no longer hide it. Despite the reasons given, nothing could make Lucy see that there was nothing she could've done to change the outcome. But Faith was right. Forgiveness is crucial and so is support, understanding and a whole lot of patience. Thanks to Will who is still in a coma but showing signs of improvement. So as long as that continues and no one else is getting hurt, Lucy will stop thinking that she's bad luck. Nadia doesn't need to know about Ezz or Lucy's issues. All she needs to know is that more problems won't help with Lucy's memory.
"Don't tell anyone, not even Holly" That needs to be said now that Holly has moved in. As long as she doesn't say, keeping it from Holly won't be difficult. The only one who already knows is CJ. Keeping it from her was impossible. But getting her to understand why Lucy can't know wasn't. It is just an unfortunate incident. CJ didn't find anything suspicious about the owner and agreed that there was no need to tell anyone. "But if she asks, you can tell her." It would be wrong to ask her to lie to Holly. Besides, she's not good at lying.
-next day-
Nadia is good at a lot of things. Cooking, swimming, making others feel better when she had not experienced it herself and apparently, she's getting better at lying too. It must be the previous lies that led her to realize that she wasn't given the entire truth because why else would Lucy be here when she was specifically told not to tell her yesterday.
"When was the last time you saw her?" Nadia asked but didn't get an answer so it must have been a long time. She didn't plan on this but the more she thought about it, the more she realized that Amy's reason for living separately from Lucy temporarily could be another lie. The first time she heard, it didn't make sense but Amy said Lucy was able to regain some parts of the past during her time in Iceland so living apart is to see if it will continue to help. It's important that Lucy does. It could help Max and Will so she believed the explanation given. More problems. More worries. Worries will lead to failure. That makes sense. What doesn't is being asked to keep this from Lucy too. "I didn't tell her about this." Nadia smiled before heading to the bathroom. The promise is not to tell Lucy about the dog bite. She didn't.
Thank you so much. Nadia. Amy said in her own mind since this isn't the right place or time to tell her how she really feels. It wasn't a lie. Living apart is to see if it could help with Lucy's memory but mainly, it's because Lucy wanted to be left alone. If it would help, she would tell Nadia everything but it won't and because Faith said don't tell anyone else, don't ask what happened, don't push her but also don't agree with her which is very confusing advice. Anthony's suggestion to give Lucy space and time to deal with it alone wasn't. He's right. Faith isn't wrong either. The process of healing starts with forgiveness.
"Does it hurt?" Lucy asked after taking a seat next to Amy.
As odd as this question is, it's better than an apology. "Sometimes"
"How many?"
"one" Amy again responded while wondering what exactly did Nadia say to her. Doesn't she know it's just a simple procedure?
"I had all mine out. Couldn't feel a thing. It hurts a little afterwards but just a little. Just don't spit, don't use straw, don't eat sticky foods, no pasta, that will prevent getting a dry socket, that's painful, they say…" Lucy continued to describe her experience when she got all her wisdom teeth taken out.
It has been two months without contact. According to Anthony, she's doing fine. According to Faith, Lucy will never be able to let it go which was disheartening to hear. But that doesn't mean life can't continue on. There will always be a scar but at least now, her heart isn't severely broken. Life will be different. There will be change. That day will come and she'll realize what's more important. Is today…the day?
"…you won't even feel the injection so don't be scared, it's a simple procedure."
"I'm not scared." Amy said, regretting it afterwards since she just realized what Nadia might have told her. "Just nervous" Scared and nervous aren't the same. Anyone who hasn't done this before would be nervous. Anyone who has their love ones here and their hand held would feel better. It has been a long time, so long it feels like it's the first time. As much as she would like this feeling to continue, a patient just came in and it's time to go.
"I'll go in with you."
As much as she would like that, it's not allowed. Even if it is, it's not a good idea because "I don't want him to get distracted. This…will distract him." Amy said in a whisper against Lucy's ear before placing a short kiss on Lucy's face before following the dentist assistant inside while aware that others can see. Even if they can, so what. There are many more things to worry about. All she wants is to let Lucy know that nothing has changed since that night she agreed to leave her alone.
Lucy sits back down, then places her palm against her face. It's just a light kiss, one of many that she got from Amy but instead of being reminded of those moments, it brought back that moment when Ezz did the same on that same spot. Why? To this day, she's still not sure why Ezz forgave her. It wasn't love. It was a paid arrangement, a non-serious rebound fling. She still can't remember but with the details given that night, denying that it ever happened is no longer possible because there were moments that did feel familiar and Ezz's explanation isn't entirely impossible because the mark near her sensitive area did remind her of Brooke. Her strong personality, fearless attitude, wild and unpredictable behavior are similar to that of Brooke's. It happened because of Brooke. As much as she doesn't want to believe it, having no recollection of Ezz proved how she felt years ago. It was a mistake, one that her mind willingly wanted to forget and successfully removed that part of her past. And now, she wished it didn't.
She also wished that everyone would stop treating her like a patient. The surgery took less than an hour. Coming back here wasn't the plan. She had no regrets but now regretting to have told Nadia and CJ what she has been doing everyday since Nadia is more than willing to take Faith's place.
"Enough, that's enough. Thank you."
As good as the head massage feels, too much makes her dizzy. Meditation, deep breathing, yoga, massage and various relaxation exercises were Faith's suggestion to help with memory loss. There's no harm in trying. There's no improvement but it did help relieve the stress. But the guilt still exists.
"I have to go."
Better get going before CJ starts asking questions since she has been very quiet, just staring like she's waiting for the right moment. Nadia doesn't know about Ezz but it's possible CJ does if Bryan didn't keep it to himself like he was told to.
"Why?" Nadia asked but got the same response. It's only 4:00. She was looking at the phone a few times but what's there to do? Is there a need to continue with this living arrangement? Isn't two months long enough to prove that it's not working? Does Amy know she wasn't planning to stay? The answer became obvious a few minutes later after Lucy left. Amy might not have asked where Lucy went but she made the mistake of looking inside the kitchen cabinet longer than she should. No doubt, she must be upset with Lucy. If talking doesn't disturb the healing process, she probably would have a lot to say like CJ who has been very quiet earlier but now thinks there's something wrong. Relaxation exercises help with stress, anxiety, sleep, blood pressure, and many other issues. There's nothing wrong with that so to say that Lucy has been brainwashed is ridiculous.
"You better go after her before she gets too deep."
"too deep in what?" Nadia asked since Amy didn't and is looking confused too.
"Didn't you notice the way she looks?"
Nadia turned towards Amy to see if she noticed anything. Nope, she's still confused. Lucy isn't as thin as she used to be but a little weight gain actually made her look better. The guy at the oral surgery office was staring at her when she didn't have her mask on. Amy, no doubt, must have felt the same way since she couldn't resist giving Lucy a kiss on the cheek even when she knew that others could see. So what's wrong? "She looks fine."
Can't blame Nadia for not noticing but Amy should since she used to be an agent. "meditation, massage, deep breathing? that's what cults do, that's what desperate ones do, she's desperate to remembah" CJ said, holding the urge to tell them how she came up with this because they both would be pissed if they knew what Holly did to help Lucy to remember years ago. "Jesus Christ" That's what Lucy always say. It got her saying it too. That's because Nadia and Amy still don't get it. "How long have you known Faith? You trust her? What's next? What do you think she's-" Okaaay. There's no need to tell them about Holly since the former agent understood but why is she going upstairs?
Amy quickly took the phone out of her handbag. Anthony can be trusted but Faith? She did that night but not as much afterwards. Faith has been helpful but sometimes, her comments seemed like she has another motive because she once said Lucy will eventually realize what's more important which was comforting to hear until she said:
"Brooke did. Brooke realized being with her is more important than her own life."
Getting information about Brooke was necessary to understand what Lucy is thinking but that comment was so inappropriate, it did make her wonder if that was deliberate. She wasn't sure then but now is. Faith, after all, was Brooke's personal nurse and she did say Brooke had always treated her like a friend not an employee. So it's possible she wants Lucy for herself or she's doing this for Brooke. Why else would she say that living apart for awhile would be good for Lucy? It might not be her suggestion since Lucy did say she wanted to be left alone. But two months without contact? CJ is right. Lucy is desperate and will try anything to help get her memory back.
After getting a dial tone, Amy realized it's a bad idea to call since she won't be able to talk clearly with the gauze in her mouth. Nadia would be able to. Nadia won't be able to persuade Lucy but she'll be able to get Lucy to be aware of Faith's intention.
"It's Nadia. No, nothing's wrong. Are you driving? Can you pull over?..no problems, just pull over. Okay?"
Nadia's sweet voice hasn't changed and it seems that her brain still hasn't learned that an innocent face like Faith's can still have bad intentions because why else would she be asking what she should say?
"Tell her don't believe everything Faith says. Tell her you can-" Amy didn't continue since Nadia refused to do as asked. It did seem that way until she said:
"She wants to talk to you." Nadia said.
There's no reason not to take the call at this point. There's a reason to wait to say what's on her mind though. "mhm" Amy hung up while knowing that her one word response would confuse them. That's because there's no need to tell Lucy about Faith because CJ is wrong. "She's going to get her clothing." That's what Lucy said. She's surprised to hear it too. There was also a question after that. It's only 3 simple words but it made her realize that Lucy has changed. Is that…okay? Hearing that question made her heart beat faster at that moment. Of course it's okay. She had wanted to say but a simple mhm was enough.
"She's coming back?" Nadia asked just to make sure since Amy's expression is the same as before. There's no smile. Her left side of the face look swollen with the gauze in her mouth so it's hard to tell.
"mhm"
"Yes!" Nadia said, clapping a few times before giving Amy a hug.
That is good news. There's no need to get this excited though but it did make her wonder if that's what Lucy did after hanging up. There's no need to start preparing for dinner just for Lucy either. "mm-" Amy covered her mouth, then quickly headed to the bathroom instead of telling Nadia that she's not sure if Lucy will come back for dinner since Nadia already left to go downstairs and her mouth is filled with saliva which happens every time she talks. The extraction is painless as Lucy said but she didn't say this would happen. Hopefully, the hole doesn't take more than a week to close because not being able to brush for a day and use mouthwash already feels disgusting. Why today? But if this didn't happen, would she have? If Lucy didn't say what she has been doing, would CJ still think there's something wrong with her?
"Anthony's not there, for a few days now. Did you know?"
No. But so what? That doesn't mean anything happened between them. Lucy asked for permission because of Brooke, because she slept with Brooke which she had always denied it as cheating until that night. Lucy was blaming herself because she believes that's what killed Brooke. That's what Faith said. So to say that Lucy could have made the same mistake with Faith is absolutely absurd. Lucy is desperate but she also can't be easily persuaded. Besides, Anthony would never hire Faith if he doesn't trust her. CJ obviously doesn't since she's texting Bryan to find out more about Faith. It's good to know that Bryan had nothing bad to say about Faith. Not only him, Holly doesn't either and surprisingly found Faith to be easy to talk to, perceptive, talented and funny. Faith is easy to talk to but funny and talented?
"She can sing too." Holly described the time when Faith brought in an electric piano to play for Will. "She said if Will knows how to play, she'll be able to tell the difference." Holly shrugged after Nadia asked how since that makes no sense to her either. Music can help but what difference does it make if the music is played from the computer or live? What also doesn't make sense is why all of a sudden, everyone is interested in Faith, everyone except CJ who doesn't look like the type that reads books especially when she had been spending a lot of time watching movies in the last few months according to Nadia so it's odd to see that she found another hobby. Amy is acting strange too. It's just an extraction. She can still talk yet she doesn't want to because she's afraid it would take longer to heal so she wrote the questions on a piece of paper and now she's looking oddly at CJ who's not paying any attention to anyone except the book. As for Nadia, she loves to make new dishes but not today. The lemon soufflé is delicious though but what's the occasion? "What happened?" Holly asked in a whisper into Nadia's ear after taking a bite of the soufflé that was fed to her while knowing that she might not get an answer since Amy is nearby so she's surprised to get one and is not I'll tell you later. "Really? When?"
When? Good question. Lucy didn't say today but Amy assumed that it is. All she had to do was call like CJ said but for a crazy reason, she doesn't want to. It's already 8pm. Does she still think it's today now that she knows Lucy is with Will and Faith is there too? Or is she waiting just to prove that CJ is wrong? It is preposterous to think that there is something going on between Faith and Lucy. But CJ is right about a few things. Why didn't Lucy say it's today if it is today? Why can't Bryan say where Lucy is 4 hours ago? Where did she go? Why did Faith agreed to stay to take care of Will when she wasn't happy? That's what Amy said. Even she was surprised to learn that Faith didn't quit. Is it because of Lucy? "tomorrow" Nadia said since it's not looking like it would be today.
"ha"
Did she just-It might be just a short laugh but it sounded like CJ did so intentionally. It seems that Amy took it that way too since she's going to sleep. If it was intentional, that's not nice. "What so funny?"
"He finally succeeded in quitting caffeine, now his butt's backed up." CJ laughs.
What? She's texting Bryan, not reading the book?
"Anything he can do? He doesn't want to take medicine or drink that fiber crap."
Sometimes it's hard to tell if CJ is being serious. She's laughing at her own comment. But Holly took it seriously. She's on the floor, showing her how.
"Hold it like this for 30 seconds, then the other, then hold both-"
"oh shit" CJ said.
It doesn't look like CJ is joking around this time. She's going up the stairs in a hurry. Why? There's a bathroom down here. She's calling for Amy. Why? Whatever it is, Amy already knows and is all dressed, ready to go alone if CJ allows her to. "What happened?" Nadia asked again after being told to lock all doors.
"Will's awake." Amy said.
Part 2
That is good news. But it's too early to celebrate. Something must be wrong otherwise Lucy wouldn't have called. There's no need for CJ to come with. Holly would've been a better choice since she saw Will 3 hours ago so she would know more about Will's condition since she's been taking care of Will and she has more experience driving on the right side!
"Haaay!" It's urgent but there's no need to drive like a criminal on the run. "Please don't do that. We don't want cops." Amy looked to the back to see if there are any.
"You want to see her or not?"
Well that's an odd question. Of course. "That's why I want you to slow down."
"She's awake but it could be just temporary, so she can see the ones she loves one last time, that can happen" CJ said.
Understood. It is possible but Will's condition has been improving. Lucy didn't say hurry but she did sound different like she was…scared. God, I hope not. She's never going to forgive herself. Amy takes the phone out with the intention to call Lucy back until she heard an apology followed by an explanation which is unexpected since CJ had said earlier that Lucy is weak when it comes to woman, Lucy has been brainwashed by Faith and she will do anything to get her memory back including sleeping with her. Now she doesn't think so? So what changed her mind?
"I just don't get why you'd still want to be with her, why you still trust her."
This time, CJ's question is not so easy to answer. It's surprising to hear that she feels this way too.
"You're still young, you know. Don't fall into that old maid crap. You still have a lot of time to find the right one. Even if you can't, just freeze your eggs. Get a surrogate. There are many who's willing…."
It's surprising to hear that she has talked to Holly about the process of freezing her own eggs. Even more surprising is how she tried to get Lucy back here by exaggerating the relationship she has with the vet. It didn't work but that doesn't mean Lucy didn't care. Lucy can be arrogant, controlling, insensitive but she has a lot of good qualities too.
"You should give yourself some time to see what's out there. And I think Dr. Oliver is a nice guy."
Dr. Oliver, the vet, is a nice guy. As good as the advice is, CJ failed to understand one thing.
"I love her" Amy thought that would be the end of it until CJ mentioned the cult again.
"You think you love her. You think you can't live without her because you've been with her for so long. She changed you and you don't even know it." CJ paused, letting her words sink in. Thirty seconds of silence is long enough to know that the former agent doesn't want to talk because of her mouth or because I'm driving. Another possibility is she doesn't agree and thinks she's wasting her time in responding. "I just don't get how you can forgive her. She cheated on you."
(sigh) First, Lucy. Now, she thinks I've been brainwashed. As logical as CJ's explanation is, she was hoping no one else knows besides Faith and Anthony. Lucy would not have told anyone else so most likely, Bryan must have somehow found out. It was difficult. She did feel like she had been lied to. Many times, she had asked herself what would happen if she had known that day when Lucy asked her out. Would I have gone out with her? The answer is no. That's why she went back to New York without her after finding out from Aria's spy recorder. Then things happened. That feeling of being lied to slowly dissipated. Then after finding out that it was Brooke's request, she started to understand why Lucy had always denied having cheated. But even so, whether it's for Brooke, love, sex, a mistake, or any reason, it's still cheating. That's what one part of her mind thinks. The other part is willing to put that aside. Years of relationship, can't just throw that away. If her life is a normal one, then it would be easy to. CJ is right though. Many couples do stay together just for this reason. But CJ will never understand until it happens to her. "She didn't. We weren't together then." Amy said before getting out of the car, immediately being reminded of what Kat said years ago.
CJ thought she finally got Amy to understand until now. That was a long moment of silence. "You're making excuses. You know that?" CJ followed in the same rapid pace after getting out of the car. Now isn't a good time to continue but there's no need to stop either. "I was talking about that lawyer chick, Ada, Brie, and Aria. Who're you talking about?"
Amy realized the mistake she made. If Bryan didn't just opened the door, she would've told CJ it's not what it looks like but CJ would probably think that's an excuse too since she was there when Brie slapped Lucy on the face. She was there when Adalyn cried for Lucy. Everyone there could see that she has feelings for Lucy. And now she must think she's right about Faith. They're sitting way too close. From this angle, it did look like Faith was kissing Lucy's face. "What happened?" Bryan said Will lock herself inside the room but he didn't say Lucy got hurt.
"Jesus. She bit you?"
Either CJ has seen it before or heard from Bryan. No explanation is provided yet and yet she noticed the injury on Lucy's forearm that doesn't look like the result of being bitten. That's not the only injury. There's a tissue box and a bowl of used tissues with blood. Lucy's nose has stopped bleeding and Faith has just finished putting tape on the left side of her neck. The explanation from Lucy is short and doesn't make sense. How can she not be sure if Will recognized her? If she does, then why did she bit her? If she doesn't, then why will she recognize me? No noises from inside can be heard. That's a sign that calls for concern. According to Lucy, Will won't kill herself since she threatened to do so to get her to leave and used the furniture to block the door. That makes sense but that's just an assumption. In the condition she's in, it's possible that she could've already fainted.
"Will" Amy knocked on the door. "Will, it's-" She doesn't know my name. Does she? "It's me, the blonde. I helped you. Remember me? You're safe now. You're safe. There's no need to be afraid." Amy again paused to listen for any noises inside. "Hope. Brie knows you're here. She's very worried about you. Remember Brie? You saved her. She's waiting for you." Bringing up the past might cause confusion so let's try something else. "I know you're confused. I was the same way. I was in a coma. I didn't trust anyone. That's okay. You are safe now. You can trust me. Let me show you." Hopefully, that would get her to open the door. If not, Bryan has the tools ready. "Hope? I'm-" There's no need to wait any longer because a cry in agony can now be heard. There's another way to get in but it would be too dangerous to climb thru the window at this time of the night. Using the drill would be faster. Amy quickly took hold of Bryan to stop him from pushing the door open any further since no woman in a vulnerable state would want to see a man. That includes Lucy and everyone else.
Oh God.
Having been an agent, she has seen many grotesque situations before. This one brought back memories. This one hurts the most. Water, piano, pillow, urinary bag, shattered glass from the window, and medical equipment are scattered on the floor. A mess is expected. But not blood and not Will lying naked on the floor, crying and shivering. Amy quickly took the sheets from the bed and put it over Will before calling for CJ. Faith would be the one who can help but not knowing how Will react to Faith, it would be better to have her and Lucy to stay outside temporarily. "You're safe now. You're safe now. It's going to be okay. Ssshh…" Amy continued with words of comfort while holding firmly onto Will and hope that Will is strong enough to get thru this because no one can save her except herself. No one can stop her from hurting herself.
Mental illness. Many people have it. Some are born with it. Drugs, alcohol, stress, trauma, and life experiences trigger it. There is no known cure but there are treatments that can minimize the symptoms. But in Will's case, it'll be a long difficult road ahead to healing according to Faith which is depressing to hear. It's expected though. That's why Lucy wished that Will would have no memories when she wakes up. Unfortunately, the opposite happened. Not only does she remember who she is, she also remembers what she did as Hope. That is shocking. But there is a good explanation. It's because she remembered everything months ago after getting tazed in the temple.
"temple?" Lucy asked.
"It almost killed her, so don't think about trying it." Amy said before going to the bathroom just in case Lucy is thinking of doing it to herself. 11:30 PM is way past the normal bed time. But staying with Will was necessary since she doesn't trust Faith and especially Lucy which is strange until she explained why. Having CJ along helped after all since she was able to get Will to open up. After what happened, she didn't think Will could, at least not so soon. But she's glad that Will did. Talking is the first step to healing. "ow…sss" Amy takes another gulp of water, then let it slowly flow out until she heard noises outside. Why is she so damn stubborn? "Go back inside. Now."
"It's okay. I'm just-"
"It's not okay. She doesn't want to see you." Amy didn't want to say this, at least not tonight. It's because the problem is no longer a problem. There's no need to bring it up again. There's no need to wear the male disguise either. "What were you planning to do? Continue to lie to her?"
That wasn't the plan but had thought about it. Lucy admitted before explaining why. No one knows when Will will wake up but Faith was confident that it will be soon because she said she noticed a reaction. It wasn't a movement. It was a change in brain activity. What caused it? She can't be sure. It could be the song she was singing. It could be the music from the piano. It could be the conversation they had. It could be the change of atmosphere. Staying in a normal bedroom with real sunlight, scent of summer air would be better than being in a bubble. Whatever it is, Faith wanted to figure it out by doing the same thing she did which included talking about Will's past. There's not much that she can say about Will's past since Faith can't know about a lot of things including the incident with the megastar. So she talked about her character, how Will saved her from drowning without the details, and how Will ended up as Hope. It didn't work though. There was no change for a week. But Faith kept saying 'any day now, so be prepared.' Prepare for what? She had no idea what Faith meant until she explained that most coma patients can remember after they wake up. They will be confused at first. Any type of surprise is never good which is a good point because she remembered how she felt after finding out that she gave up everything for a DEB. So what will Will do if she finds out the truth? That's a good question but that wasn't the reason she wore this male disguise. She did because she went to visit Uncle Nick. She didn't take it off because she didn't get the chance to do so and also because she thought of something she never tried. Talk as David. Say the same things she did when she was in the Underground chamber. Reenact those moments that she had with Will including that final moment in the hospital. Ceeba, ceeba, ceeba. She said it many times. It didn't work until she got closer to her ear. The bite on the neck was so sudden and so painful, there would've been lot more blood if Will wasn't weak.
It's me. David.
It was shocking to see that Will could get herself out of bed but that only lasted a few seconds. She had thought that Will remembered since she said 'David' before fainting. Then she realized that Will was only pretending after getting another bite on her arm and a stab on her thigh that would've been a lot worse if it was a knife, not a pencil.
"She's still mad at me?" Lucy asked even though it's obvious. Anyone would be but this outcome is one she never thought would happen because she thought Will would want to know how she got here first. Most likely, she already knew how she was left for dead before she fell into a coma.
"Is that all you did?" Amy asked only because Lucy's explanation is not enough to prove that she's right. Not only stubborn, Lucy can be so clueless. Faith doesn't know either since she was taking a shower when it happened. "Did you…touch her?"
"What? Nnno."
That's the reaction she expected to get from Lucy. But why is she still not getting it? Amy pulled her back from the door.
"There's a misunderstanding. I can explain."
"So you did touch her?"
"Nnno. I was just washing her up. Faith has been doing it. I was just helping out."
"Were you looking at her boobs?"
"Oh my gard. Is that why she, I was looking at the tattoos. I swear to God, I was not"
"Relax. She knows."
"She knows?"
"I told her." It was difficult to get Will to say anything. Thanks to CJ who asked the right questions. CJ did because she had seen others in Will's condition. Will was shivering and crying. She did because she doesn't think it's impossible. She did because she thinks Lucy is a womanizer. Did he touch you? It was shocking to find out that's what prompted Will to attack. How is that possible? There has to be a misunderstanding. It wasn't difficult to come up with an explanation after noticing the empty bucket, water and towel on the floor. But that alone won't make Will feel better. The truth did. "She knows you're not David." Not only stubborn, Lucy can be so insensitive just like CJ said. Why would she still think Will would want to see her now even if she knows the truth? Man or woman, she was touched by a stranger. That feeling of being violated doesn't instantly go away. That's not the only thing she has to deal with. "Leave her alone."
"I just-"
"Go take a shower. Go" Amy pointed to the bathroom while deliberately holding the left side of her face to show Lucy that she's causing her pain. It worked. But that doesn't mean Lucy won't try again when it's her turn to take a shower. So it's necessary to send CJ a message before she does.
A quick shower took 5 minutes. Putting a new bandage around the leg took a few more. That's long enough for Lucy to do a lot of things. She's in bed, facing the other way but that doesn't mean she didn't go out. There's a bottle of water and acetaminophen on the end table so she must have. Did she see her? Amy decided not to ask and slipped into bed and turned off the lights since talking about it now would let Lucy find out about the dog bite wound. It would be impossible to hide it from her since it's summer time. She's used to wearing shorts to sleep in the summer time even if there is air conditioning so Lucy would know there's something wrong if she wore long pants to sleep. Lucy will eventually find out. For now, she doesn't need to know. After what happened, she's probably blaming herself again. Amy reached out with the intention to hold Lucy to comfort her, then decided to pull back after hearing sounds of breathing. Lucy might not have fallen deep asleep yet but Lucy has changed. She's not the same person from 2 months ago. She doesn't need words of comfort to know that this situation with Will is getting better even though the outcome is different from what she expected. She's stronger now, not physically but mentally.
-next day-
…and she's back to having the same irresponsible, bossy behavior like the 18 year old! How could she just leave without talking about it first! Whose idea is this? It can't be Lucy's alone. CJ could have something to do with this since she said last night it would be better to have Lucy stay away from Will for awhile. Faith agreed too but is concerned that Lucy will no longer continue with the meditation and massage routine that she believes will help with Lucy's memory. Is it just because of that or is it because she's not going to be able to see Lucy as often as she used to? More time is needed to tell if CJ is right about her.
For now, nothing proves it since Faith has been as helpful as Holly. It didn't take long for Will to change her perception of her. Who knew music could be so effective? Faith did. Who knew a puppy was all it took to create that smile again? Holly did. She suggested it. Who knew Doc's method of treatment would work? No one. It may have worked but it didn't cure Will's ability to feel pain. Without it, it would be difficult to-
"Jesus, don't do that" It's not CJ's fault but she should have made noises before getting so close.
"so?" CJ said after apologizing.
"So what?" Amy went back to finish washing the dishes instead of looking outside.
"the sooner the better, she said"
CJ must be bored. Why else would she be so concerned in my life than her own? She's not wrong though. But this isn't the time. "It's not safe now, covid cases are still high, and it's not a good time to get pregnant. So get protection." Pivoting doesn't always work but that's to let CJ know that she noticed she and Bryan have been together a lot lately instead of texting. Surprisingly, CJ didn't deny getting back together with Bryan but what does she mean they have an open relationship?
"No commitment. We can still see anyone we want. We're taking it slow."
So does that mean they're not together?
"kind of like yours except we don't sleep together, oh wait, you don't either, so yea, kind of like yours"
CJ has been very helpful taking care of Will and offering to cook, especially in the first week after Will woke up since Will trusts her more than anyone else. But she can be so damn annoying since this isn't the first time she expressed her disagreement with this arrangement. It's the first time she used this method. Continuing to live apart was Faith's suggestion. The first time she heard, she thought CJ was right about Faith. Maybe she is trying to ruin my marriage. But after getting the same explanation from Lucy, Faith's suggestion doesn't seem that ridiculous because Lucy is right. Without Faith, Will would not have woken up so soon. As crazy as it sounds, there's no harm in trying. Two months of meditation, head massage, and relaxation exercises didn't work but it did help Lucy cope with her issues. One more month is not an unreasonable request. Besides, Nadia is helping Lucy not Faith. So there's no need to think that Faith has other intentions other than just wanting to prove her theory. Her explanation doesn't sound like a lie. She truly believes that Brooke would still be alive today if she was able to control herself from having impure thoughts.
"Have you seen her?" No response must mean no. "Well, I hope after 2 days, she still finds you sexy." CJ tosses the towel into the trashcan before bursting into laughter.
That is not funny. CJ might not have said so but she's probably thinking I'm stupid to have fallen for it. It is a really, really bad suggestion but Lucy wanted to try. No one knows herself better than herself. But in this case, she doesn't or doesn't want to admit it. Mediation is known to improve brain health and well-being. Clearing the mind from intrusive thoughts might help. No one knows but it's a very difficult task, impossible even especially for someone like Lucy. If Faith knows Lucy's history, she probably wouldn't have suggested it. "It could still happen. It's not over yet." Amy said just to show CJ that she's wrong about Lucy which didn't work since CJ is laughing more loudly than before.
"I hope she can and I hope you'd know what to do if she asks for another month. Putting your life on hold for something you have no control of is not the way to live."
Amy let out a long deep sigh after CJ left to go to the backyard instead of responding since there's no need to tell CJ that she knows that Lucy won't ask for another month. The only reason she did is because of Will. If Will did not wake up, Lucy would have kept her original plan to move back home. Will's change is what caused Lucy to believe in Faith more than she did before. If it doesn't work after 2 days, she will give up trying Faith's method but she will never be the same as she was before. No one would be able to convince her to stop trying.
But maybe Will can get her to stop sooner. "Are you sure?" Amy asked, surprised to hear that Will wants to see Lucy this soon.
"tonight" CJ said.
Amy didn't have to ask to know what CJ is thinking. The sooner the better. Lucy would be so thrilled. Where are you? It didn't take long for Lucy to respond back but the response via texting is unexpected. Tomorrow? Tomorrow is better than 2 days. But tonight would've been better because tonight's atmosphere is a lot different from the past few weeks. Will is talking more than before, not about herself but asking questions about everyone. Thanks to CJ and Faith, they both have funny stories to share. Who knew that Faith could be this funny? Holly did say that but did she know about this? It's not a song that can win a Grammy, at least not in the old days, but now it probably can because Faith is playing the piano and singing about everyone from her perspective and it's not all nice. But it's funny. CJ must think so too since she's laughing even after being called a smart, nosy, caring fake blonde.
"I'm nosy because I care" CJ admitted, then burst into laughter after hearing the next lyric. It's because she just realized that she's not the only one who thinks that Amy is a germophobe and Faith wants to know how she could be married if she is. "How does that work? Do you goggle with mouthwash after every kiss or is kissing not allowed? Or do you wash your hands and oww"
Amy pulls the cushion back and repeat. That's what she gets. The couch cushion doesn't hurt much. The next would be a punch if Will wasn't laughing. If this is CJ's intention, then she can continue as long as she wants to. Lucy, you're missing this. She may have missed this moment but there will be many more. Who knew it would be this soon? No one did, not even Faith who was as shocked as everyone when she first learned what was being used to keep Will alive. With her experiences as a nurse, not even she could say if Will would be able to get thru this even if she wakes up. But now, there's no doubt that Will can.
-next day-
Will seemed like she was looking forward to it and now after hours of waiting, she looks…nervous? Why? The one who should be is Lucy. Why isn't she here yet? She's late. Amy takes out the phone with the intention to call Nadia since Lucy is probably the one driving until Holly said they're here.
"Wait" CJ said.
CJ's intention last night was obvious. What does she have in mind now? "Why?" Amy asked since she has absolutely no clue this time. Why wait inside? It still doesn't make sense after being told that Will would want to talk to Lucy alone. So? She can if she wants to. CJ's other reason makes a little more sense but waiting inside just to let Lucy know how I feel so she doesn't ask for another month is a waste of time. CJ will never understand but Holly does. She's moving in a hurry too to see Nadia even though they've been talking, texting, and have seen each other just not everyday and not yesterday. Having been living apart with the one she loves for almost a month so that Nadia could help Lucy is the reason she's feeling this way too.
It's too late for the former blonde agent but not too late for Will. "You okay?" CJ asked since Will is still sitting on the outdoor chair and not looking towards the fence door where Lucy would be coming from. "If you're not ready" CJ didn't continue after getting her wrist held onto. "Here she comes" CJ warned in case Will wants to change her mind. There's still time. She doesn't. She is, however, acting weird. Why still ask if that is her when she has already met Nadia? Maybe just surprised how different Lucy looks as a female? "make-up these days can make anyone look-What's wrong?" The grip on her wrist is getting tighter. Will is now standing and holding her heart.
"Does it hurt? If it doesn't, it's normal." Faith didn't explain since she has an idea of what's causing it. There will be time to do so later. Now is time to go to her experimental subject and give her a big hug. One month isn't over yet but 90 days is a clear sign that her method failed this time. "It's okay."
Getting assurance from Faith, Lucy continued to take each step in a slow pace. Thanks to Faith for the heads-up yesterday. Otherwise she wouldn't have waited until today. Why wait? She didn't understand but it seems that Faith knows more about Will than everyone else. She does look nervous. Just like Faith predicted yesterday. Why? Shouldn't she still be mad? Wouldn't she want to slap me, bite me, punch me in the nose again? If she does, then...
Amy looked to the left after hearing sounds of sniffle. It's from Nadia. Everyone else here must be feeling the same way even though no one else's tears can be seen since they're still looking outside, probably wondering what Lucy said to get Will to give her a hug instead of a slap on the face. It's impossible to hear inside here behind this French door but it's not impossible to see that Will's condition will continue to improve. A new life is possible and all of this is happening because of Faith. It was her idea to use this place for Will to recuperate. Only she can get Anthony to agree to live somewhere else. No men is allowed until Will feels comfortable. It was her idea to have a cookout in the backyard instead of ordering lunch. This is a good spot to see and at the same time allow Will and Lucy to talk privately. It was her suggestion to have everyone move in excluding Nadia after Lucy decided to continue with the one month meditation so that Lucy can concentrate with Nadia's help. Surround Will with support and the people she feels comfortable with was effective as expected.
But what the heck did she say to her!
-a few weeks later—
"What happened?" Faith asked since she wasn't expecting this to be the first question when she agreed to meet half an hour ago.
"Did you tell her to continue with your experiment?" Amy asked, knowing how rude her previous question came out but she can't help it since three weeks have already passed and nothing has changed.
"Isn't she living with you?"
Coming here instead of talking on the phone was to see how Faith would react. It doesn't look like she's lying. "She is. But…she's different."
"different how?"
Amy expected that but was hoping she doesn't have to say more than that because she still doesn't fully trust Faith with personal information despite how helpful she has been. "She spends a lot of time with Will but she doesn't want me to go with her and everyday she comes home, she's too tired to do anything else. So what did you have her do?" Nadia didn't find anything wrong with Faith's relaxation techniques but she might not know everything Lucy was doing since she wasn't with her 24/7. She doesn't know if Lucy is taking any special medication to help with stress either. Now that her help is not needed, no one knows what Lucy is doing when she's not with Will.
"Did you ask her?"
Faith isn't dumb so why is she asking a dumb question?
"Physical rehabilitation takes a long time. Mental rehabilitation requires the right person. Will feels more comfortable with her. It's normal. There's nothing going on between them. You don't need to worry."
Faith is not a doctor but she has shown herself to be smart, understanding and knowledgeable in many areas so why is she so clueless now? "That's not what I meant. I just want to know if you told her to keep trying because she's still doing the headstand and the meditation." There is nothing wrong with that but that's because she doesn't know how Lucy used to be. "She never used to do that, headstand sometimes but never everyday. Now, she's like obsessed. She used to like steaks, lobster, ribs, but not anymore." She's becoming a vegetarian like me. There's no need to tell her that since that's not the point.
"Less meat is healthy. Headstand helps with blood flow. Meditation helps-"
"She's different, all right!" That's rude but is necessary since she's tired of hearing the same thing over and over again.
"Meditation helps with anger too. You should try it."
She's tired of being nice too. Faith doesn't look or talk like Doc but that doesn't mean she's not capable of mental manipulation. "I like you. Faith. I am grateful for everything you've done. But if I find out you have other intentions" There's no need to continue since she's certain she got her point across. That look on Faith's face is one that she has seen many times before on those who thought she is just a nice, simple-minded, harmless blonde based on her looks. Faith too has that same 'nice girl' look which is probably why no one thinks she could have other intentions including Anthony who thinks she's a godsend, literally sent by God. Faith is helpful but definitely no angel. Holly didn't find anything wrong with her either but did say she couldn't understand why Faith would take the job as Anthony's personal nurse which is a very good point.
Does Lucy know why? Does she think Faith is sent by God to help her too?
As strange as it is to hear it from Anthony, it's good to know that he hasn't been brainwashed although he has been acting strange lately. He's not the only one.
What's today? Lucy is usually gone by 10AM to go see Will. She was. But why came back? And why is she dressed as a guy again?
"Let me" Amy said instead of asking if Lucy needs help since she's certain that Lucy does. Putting the beard on by herself is not impossible but it would take longer to get it right. Should I ask why? There has to be a reason. It's not hot out there but it is too warm to be wearing a suit and tie. Protecting herself from unwanted attention cannot be the reason unless she's not going to see Will. "You going to see Uncle Nick?" The could be the reason since she did last time. She is but surprisingly that's the only reason. "Why?" Why does Will want to see her dressed as David again? Lucy doesn't know either but thinks it's because Will misses him which is so unexpected, it's actually pretty funny because it seems like the old arrogant, confident Lucy is back. The joke and the wink along with those dimples brought back memories of unforgettable moments that haven't happened for a long time. "There, perfect." Amy deliberately turned Lucy around to face the dresser mirror before wrapping her arms around her waist from behind. "No one is going to know unless they do this." Amy pressed her lips against Lucy's neck and let her right hand slide up to Lucy's chest and the other in the opposite direction. They're bounded but she can still feel them. Apparently, Lucy can too since she's breathing more rapidly. It's not night time but this is a good time since everyone went out. That is until she heard the name Faith. She told her?
"She's just trying to help." Lucy said.
"Hah!" That was deliberate to show Lucy how wrong she is. "She likes you. Did you know?" The reason Faith took the job as Anthony's personal nurse was so that she can see Lucy again. She admitted but didn't tell Lucy. Lucy must have known though since she has had many experiences with women to know the difference between flirting and joking around. But why does she look confused? "She said she didn't know you're married. Why didn't you tell her?"
"There's nothing going on between us."
"That's not what I asked." There's no reason to hide her marriage status so why? It seems that Lucy doesn't have a good reason either since she didn't explain and is again defending Faith just like Anthony did. It's good to know that she's not thinking about or trying to get her memory back again but she's obviously blinded by Will's improvement because how could she not notice what's happening. "Have you noticed how much you've changed?" It seems that she has. Going to sleep earlier and waking up earlier than usual is a good thing. She's not wrong there.
"…My cholesterol's down. Blood pressure's normal. I can drink decaf now and I don't feel sleepy. My hair's stopped falling out and"
"Your hair's falling out?" Amy never noticed but did noticed that she got a haircut on that day of the cookout. That's when she realized she was right about Faith. Everyone looks at beautiful things. But she did more than just looking. She hugged Lucy when there's no need to.
"it's fine now" Lucy took Amy's hand from messing up her hair.
Hair loss happens to mostly men at this age, not many women. It could be from stress or hair dye. Drugs would do that too. Since it's not happening now, then there's no need to think that she's taking any medication. "I know you don't want me to worry but you need to tell me. I'm your wife." Saying that word again instantly sent a shiver down her spine. She always disliked saying and hearing it but now it's necessary. "Okay?" One nod is good. That look of apology is plastered all over her face. The only way to change that is do what she had wanted to do on that night of the cookout but didn't since Lucy wasn't in the mood.
"umm Babe"
Amy continued with the kisses without responding since she had an idea of what Lucy wants to say.
"It's not a good time."
It's not. It would take forever to get her disguise off. The beard, the shirt, and the tie can stay on. Amy took off her own top and pants, then realized she should have done that first because Lucy no longer thinks it's not a good time. Lucy doesn't need to be led to the bed. Lucy doesn't need help in unbuckling her belt either. She still finds me sexy. CJ's right. There's no way Lucy could think like a monk. What was I thinking? No one these days can have impure thoughts unless they live under a rock. For Lucy, all it would take is two words to get her mind excited and off everything else…or not. "What?" An explanation is expected not an apology. Will can wait. The need to go is not a good reason. Amy quickly followed leaving the pants and top on the floor since there's no one else in the house. They could be back at any time but having the bra and underwear on is sufficient. "What's wrong!" Shouting would lead to an argument just like the last time when Lucy decided to leave but this time is necessary because there is something wrong and there's no way to stop Lucy from leaving. "I'm your wife! Why can't you tell me what's wrong!" This won't either but it will let Lucy know how she feels.
"I just need more time. Forgive me. All right?"
Forgive. Very rarely does Lucy use that word. Faith has though many, many times. So many, there's no doubt she is responsible. Lucy's soft spoken voice is another change. An argument did not happen because of the two words Forgive Me along with the question. The way she handled the situation was different from what the old Lucy would have done. The need to know was quickly replaced with calmness, understanding, and acceptance even though no further explanation was given. Only after Lucy left and having a moment by herself did she realize what had happened. Lucy is not one that can be easily influenced so she definitely hasn't been brainwashed. Besides, Faith isn't capable but she is capable of manipulation.
"Why did you tell her?" The question was asked but wasn't answered on the phone. A destination was given instead. There's no reason not to go. Talking face to face would be better. But a restaurant is not the right place to talk. The park isn't either but at least there's no one else nearby. It is a beautiful day to sit on the bench to relax and admire the blue sky with clouds but damn it, the purpose of being here is not to talk about the weather, Iceland or her. Faith's intention is understood though. The only way to get others' trust is voluntarily share more information about herself. But she should know it won't be that easy.
"So? What happened?" Faith asked.
Showing interest in others' lives is what a friend would do to show she cares. But for Faith, she seems to be more interested to see if she's right. "You're right" Amy doesn't want to admit it because Faith's assumption for Lucy's behavior is absolutely ridiculous.
"Details. I need details. What did she say? Did she give you another excuse? Did she try?"
Yesterday's warning worked but she never expected Faith would admit that she has feelings for Lucy. But just because she's no longer thinking about it now that she knows Lucy is married, she should know we're not that close. "Didn't…happen" Satisfied? Apparently not since she used Will's situation to explain why she wants to know which does kind of make sense. Knowing Will's background and how she saved Lucy allowed her to know a little about Will's personality and determine what is needed to help Will recover faster. Details are important but she doesn't need to know how Lucy's eyes lit up in that moment when she stripped down to her bra and undies. She doesn't need to know how Lucy was standing there near the dresser for a moment before feverishly kissing her body like it's the first time she touched them. She doesn't need to know that moaning and the two word command had always been able to get Lucy excited but this time, it had the opposite effect as if the command turned off the switch inside her. She can know about this though. "She said she needs more time, asked me to forgive her." Amy said while knowing that Faith would want to know more but she didn't expect her to ask how far Lucy got. Man or woman, nurse or not, she should know that's inappropriate to ask. "I like you. Faith." She should know where this is leading to too. "You convinced me yesterday but I still don't know why you told her. You didn't tell me you were going to tell her. I don't like surprises. So now I'm wondering again. Are you really trying to help her or are you playing with me?" It's not impossible. Some like to see others' life get destroyed slowly. She could be like Aria. She may not have suggested it but she did say bluntly that the cause of Brooke's death was having made love to Lucy. So it's possible Lucy made an excuse last time because she's afraid it would happen again. That's what she said. Trying again is the only way to prove it. She didn't suggest it but she knew that. So was she lying just to see what I would do or does she really want to help Lucy?
"I lied."
Well that's unexpected. "You what!" Amy didn't say it loudly and instead got off the bench to stand in front of Faith to show her anger. There's no one else nearby but this is not a good place to yell.
"I don't love her. I mean, not the way you love her. I took this job because I was bored and I wanted to see her again, as a friend. You didn't believe me so I told you what you want to hear."
Manipulators always have a backup plan. Does she know that's not convincing at all?
"I told her so she would try again, to prove to you there's nothing going on between us. It worked. That shows it's not severe. She just needs more time. So don't rush her. She will try again. Each time she does, she will take one step further. Then after it happens, she'll do it again and again. Then after a few more times, she'll be back to her old self."
Manipulators can come up with an explanation very fast. But in this case, does she know how ridiculous, inappropriate, and disgusting that sounds? She sounds like a sex therapist.
"I know it's hard to believe because you love her. You think everyone thinks of her the same way you do. That's normal. But if you just take a step back" Literally and figuratively. Faith extended her hands since her private space is getting smaller. "you'll be able to see what I see. She's not flawless."
Amy takes a step back. Criticizing Lucy of her flaws is a good strategy. Lucy is stubborn. She can be insensitive. She can't help herself when it comes to beautiful woman. The way she behaves can give others the wrong idea. Maybe it is Lucy's fault. Joking around can be misinterpreted as flirting. It is Lucy's fault for hiding her marriage status. But the reason is still unknown. That doesn't mean she has bad intentions. All of these are true but none of them proves that she is not attracted to Lucy which she didn't deny, surprisingly. Everyone is attracted to good looks. That's true. Physical attraction takes place first for most people. That attraction does gradually change. But using Brooke as a reason for that change is not good enough even if she said she would never do that to Brooke. Does that mean she would if Lucy never had a relationship with Brooke? It's purely platonic? Possible but sexual desire is uncontrollable. It's hard to believe that she never thought of Lucy in that way. The reasons given aren't good enough except for one which is not difficult to picture but doing so made her want to puke. Eww.
-hours later back home-
Now it's impossible to get rid of that imaginary image. Faith had the same reaction to make her point. Lucy does act like a man in a woman's body. But a female version of Anthony? Anthony in Lucy's body? Eww. Only Faith can come up with that.
"What's so funny?" CJ asked after knocking on the kitchen wall first this time since Amy seems to be in that thinking mode again.
"Hey, they're eating out tonight. You have any plans? If not, can we have some privacy when it's time to eat?" CJ should know why. It's been awhile since she had dinner alone with Lucy. That's why. Amy continued chopping the carrots until she heard:
"I don't think she'd be in the mood."
Something's wrong. There's no reason for CJ to say that because Lucy knows she's been forgiven. Lucy should be in the mood so the only reason could be "Is it Uncle Nick?" It's not. Thank God. Lucy would probably blame herself again if Uncle Nick gets sick again. It's not Uncle Nick but it's not good news either. Somehow CJ found out. She didn't say how but thank goodness she didn't keep it to herself. The dinner for two didn't happen but it wasn't quiet either. With Kato around, the only time there would be silence is when everyone goes to sleep.
Amy slid into the bed, then placed a kiss on Lucy's cheek before saying the three words of love. Trying again isn't on her mind. She would if Lucy wants to. Lucy doesn't. So for now, she's satisfied with getting the same words of love back and having her hand held. After tonight, she hope Lucy would open up to her because she's not sure how long she can keep on pretending. According to CJ, Jake came back but she doesn't know why and only knows that Lucy was back into that same non-talkative mood she was months ago. According to Faith, not wanting to talk about it is normal. So don't push her. Wait for her to open up. Pushing her will only backfire. Everyone has their own way of dealing things. So just wait. Wait? For someone who claims to have many experiences dealing with different types of people, that is crappy advice. How long? One day? One week? One month?
As crappy as it may sound, waiting is the right decision because Lucy's behavior did change after that day. No bad news enabled her to. It's also because Will is getting better day by day after the surgery that had everyone worried. Birthdays is always a good reason to celebrate and make this situation feel normal again. Right now, it's as normal as it can be. But if Scud were here, he would think otherwise. He might ask if Lucy hit her head again because Lucy is again acting like a teenager that can't stand losing so now she's using a rolled-up sock and tossing it into the laundry basket like a ball. Each time she missed, she took a step forward. Each time she made the shot, she took a step back. If she's trying to reach the wall, she'll have to get at least 10 shots in without missing. That'll take her forever.
"Did she beat you at this too?" Amy smiled at her disappointed lover. She deserves it. Sore loser. This is one of the flaws that Faith said about her. She should have given up after losing to Will in arm wrestling the second time. But her ego won't allow her to. She made everyone laugh after losing the third time but that probably wasn't her intention. Now her arm is sore which is probably affecting her throw.
"You think this is easy?"
"I didn't say that." It must not sound convincing since Lucy just tossed the rolled-up sock to her. Playing this silly game isn't what she had in mind after taking a shower but why not? Winning will show Lucy that she shouldn't underestimate anyone especially Will whom she should know is not the same person that was in the Underground chamber. Losing will have no effect as long as there is no bet involved. The first shot is easy. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. This is as easy as it looks. Seven. Eight. Nine. The last shot would be more difficult. "Don't" Amy warned in case Lucy is thinking of coughing again since she did during the last shot that almost made her miss. Here goes. Yes! Amy raised her arms in excitement since she couldn't believe it either. Damn, I should have made a bet. Being this happy over this silly game is silly but this feels normal again. Besides, Lucy's losing face is so damn adorable. Game over. It's time to be serious.
Everyone was worried when Will decided to do the surgery. It's not complicated but for Will, any type of surgery is a risk. Without the ability to feel pain, she won't be able to tell if it hurts or where it hurts. That's the surgeon's biggest concern. Thankfully, after 5 weeks under Holly's and Faith's care, Will was able to heal with no complications. Lucy knew there was no change in Will's ability to feel pain so why would she think it's a good idea to have any type of physical contact with Will even if her intention is to find out what Will is capable of? Arm wrestling is fine. Trying to see who's a better shooter with a knife and bb gun is fine. Trying to see who would win in a fight is not. It hasn't happened yet but they did agreed to a fight in the future which did sound like a joke since Will was the one who suggested it after Lucy lost in arm wrestling. Joking or not, Lucy needs to be reminded:
"If she gets hurt, she's not going to know."
"You think I can hurt her? She broke my nose."
That's funny but that's not truuue. Bone is not broken. Just blood vessels. But Lucy is right. She would've been seriously hurt if Will had the strength. Will isn't that same person that was in the underground chamber. She was trained to protect herself according to Doc who didn't like the term brainwash. She was Brie's bodyguard so she would know more than an average person does. The fact that she was pretending to still be in a coma after she woke up so that she can find out why she was there, why David was there and who David is showed how smart she is. Using her teeth and a pencil to protect herself showed what she's capable of. It's very possible that Lucy would lose. Lucy probably won't admit to defeat though. That's why she's still trying. But when will she get it?
"I think it's great that you two have this type of relationship but don't you think it's…too much?" Lucy is confused. Why? It's so obvious. CJ thinks so too. "Will…likes David. Hope…likes women." Get it now?
"oh c'mon, it's not like that. We're just-"
"I'm not saying there is." Amy interrupted after holding onto both sides of Lucy's face to stop her from talking about what she and Will has been doing for the past few weeks since she already found out from CJ. "I'm saying she's not Will anymore. So don't have any more physical contact with her. Don't hug her. You could give her the wrong idea. Just ask Faith." Surprised? It's wrong to mention Faith since Faith probably doesn't want her to know but it's necessary to get her to understand.
"Okay"
Okay? It's unlike her to just agree especially when she knows "uh" This is like her. Whenever she doesn't want to talk, she does something unexpected. Being suddenly lifted up, then carried to the bed is unexpected. The kiss isn't. This isn't what she had in mind tonight but there's no need to stop Lucy from wanting to show there's nothing going on between her and Will. No amount of meditation can stop her from having impure thoughts. Amy took off her own top, allowing Lucy to continue even though there are still some things she wanted to say since Will hasn't mentioned Brie at all. But that can wait since her brain is too busy processing the different types of sensations all over her body. It may be busy but the noises are hard to ignore and it didn't come from Lucy. "wait, sshh" Oh my god. No wonder CJ wanted to move out. It's not just because there's no need for her to be here or it's too crowded for five. It could be because her room that is now Holly's room is next to Nadia's. What happened to not sleeping together until officially married? Not sure who's suggestion that was but Nadia did say that. Lucy obviously found this funny since she's quietly laughing. "ssshh" Sound waves travel both ways. They could hear. Oh my God. CJ must have heard us too. This is so embarrassing. This feels so weird but it obviously has no effect on Lucy whatsoever. "nmm"
Just like Faith said, Lucy will try again and each time she does, it's one step closer to being back to the way she was before. Just like Faith said, it is better to wait. For someone her age, it's surprising to see how much she knows. That's not impossible. Some nurses know more than doctors do. But how the heck does she know what Lucy would do?
It never occurred to her until this morning after having a conversation with Holly who felt the need to talk about the effects of having too much sex. It's not that much. She had wanted to say but didn't since Holly must have heard to know that it is since she moved into CJ's room. It was embarrassing even though Holly didn't ask any personal questions and only provided information as a medical professional would but as embarrassing as it was, it was useful because she didn't think there was anything wrong since it has been a long time and Lucy has always been that way and she did say the meditation has the opposite effect on her, making her more horny which is funny and could be true too. Only after thinking back to that first night which occurred after that day when Faith said to wait for Lucy to open up did she realize what she missed. Coincidence or did Faith told her to?
-same day later-
"I didn't tell her to." Faith said calmly.
"I want to trust you but you are getting way too nosy, too"
"I didn't. I just made a suggestion. Okay. Wait." Faith leaned back as far as she could while extending both of her hands in case a punch is coming. Suggestion is not manipulation but to this easily triggered jealous blonde, it is. "All I said was we all knew what the outcome was going to be. She couldn't see it. So I told her to take a look at herself now from the way she was months ago. I suggested, she can continue to wait or make it happen now. The outcome would be the same. Guess she finally understood." Faith shrugged into the 'I don't know' gesture to show that she too was surprised that's all it took.
It may have been just a suggestion but it felt intrusive, like Lucy was told to, not because she wants to.
"sso, how was it?"
Warning has already been given so why is she still asking?
"Anything unusual happened? Was it good? Bad, better, was it-"
"That's none of your business."
Faith is smart. Faith is also persistent since she's not giving up. An explanation for asking is given but it still sounds ridiculous. Whether it's good sex or bad sex, it cannot be used to determine how Lucy is feeling. Of course it's not the way it used to be. With Max still in a coma, not being able to reunite with Scud yet, Will's condition, and the craziness that has been going on in the world, everyone is trying to make the situation feel as normal as possible. Everyone is putting off baby plans including Scud and Janet. But as crazy as her explanation is, she is right about one thing.
In the first night, Lucy didn't talk about Jake but Lucy was in a better mood than she was before because that night, she said Will decided to do the surgery. It was surprising to hear because no one thought that Will would or at least, not so soon. Will's decision made her realize how brave Will is and what a coward she herself is which is ridiculous considering everything that she's been thru.
You're a lot of things but you're no coward.
All it took was that and listing her stubbornness, laziness, and bad habits to turn the mood into laughter that eventually led to making love. The second night happened because Will's surgery was a success. The third night happened because Lucy finally wanted to talk about the future which they both agreed that this is not the right year to get pregnant since the virus is still not yet under control and there is not enough data to know if the vaccine would have any effect to pregnancy. Each time it happened, it brought a sense of normalcy. That's how it felt until now.
"sso, the lights were on every time?" Faith asked again even though she has a feeling that she's right since the question isn't difficult unless they did it so many times, she needs time to think about it. But how many times could they have done it? It has only been 5 weeks unless "You two did it everyday?"
"Get out" Amy said as calmly as she could even though her heart is beating rapidly.
"I just want to-"
"Stop being so nosy. That's none of your business!"
"Okay, okay, calm down, breathe" Faith quickly got out of the car to avoid getting yelled at. "Let's go out for lunch next time. I promise I won't talk about this. Okay?" Faith closed the car door without waiting for an answer since the answer is most likely no, for now. Lunch didn't happen today but she's hoping that there will be a next time because she found this blonde, who came all this way to just ask a question, more and more interesting.
Amy inhaled and slowly exhaled several times while trying not to think about it but it's difficult to do so with her eyes closed. It's also difficult to tell what Faith's intention is. She can usually tell with other people but not with Faith since no one has anything bad to say about her other than she is a little naïve, nosy, and some of her jokes are rude. So was that deliberate? Lights weren't on every time but she's not wrong though. No lights were needed during the day. Did Lucy keep the lights on to prevent herself from thinking of Brooke? Who was the apology for? Sleep talking hasn't happened to her for a very long time. So who was she talking to? Who is Faith talking to? This is a safe neighborhood. There's no reason for Faith to be talking to anyone, not even the neighbors. Is she being nosy again? What the hell. Amy stopped looking at the rear view mirror and quickly pulled out the car keys from the ignition since the neighbor or whoever he is just pushed Faith out of his way. What is she doing? Going after the intruder is the right thing to do but she should know the smart thing to do is run away, then call for help.
"He's not here!" Faith said.
She should know that won't stop him from looking for Anthony. She should know he won't be able to get the door open unless…wwhy? It's definitely not a mistake. Lucy would know better than to open the door. It seems that she does. Will does too. Are they expecting him? Why are they both in male disguise? Is that real? Real or not, Will's gun pointed to his head got him to take his hands of Lucy's collar. But why did she tell Will to put the gun down? Why is Will patting him down without being told, acting like she works for Lucy?
"Let's talk upstairs." Lucy said, regretted opening the door without first looking at all the surveillance monitors since she didn't realize Amy was outside too.
"What's going on?" Amy interrupted since now it's obvious that he's not here to look for Anthony. It's also obvious that Faith knows too since she's taking him by the arm and escorting him to the back while talking over him, clearly trying to prevent anyone from hearing what he has to say. "What's going on!" That's necessary since she hates to be ignored.
"See what you did. Now you're putting her at risk." Faith said before returning to the impatient blonde whom she recently found out is not as healthy as she looks. "You need to calm down. Your aneurysm can still rupture. No one will be able to help you if it does. You're lucky last time. So breathe, stay calm. Meditation will help. Now close your eyes and-" Faith didn't continue after getting pushed aside.
Amy followed until the door to the family room is closed. It's not too late to demand an explanation but there's no need to since Faith knows.
Lucy locked door while knowing it's not going to prevent Amy from finding out later but it might be more than she's willing to share if he continues to open his mouth like that.
"Who's she?"
That's expected but he should know he's not going to get an answer so why still ask? "What you doing here?" The meeting was tonight and not here and if he thinks I would let him get so close again, he hasn't learned.
"If you're a man, I'd hit you."
He found out. Not surprising. It's surprising that it took him this long. "She already did. And I would let you do it again if it would bring her back."
Meanwhile
Why is he here? Faith said she doesn't know which could be a lie. One way to find out is eavesdrop. If Faith isn't again talking, it would've made her last response (I don't know) more believable. "sssh" It is wrong to eavesdrop but there's a chance Lucy would keep it to herself again. Mumbling inside can be heard. It's difficult to hear anything else. But noises outside can be heard with ease though. Jake? What's he doing here? "What's wrong?" Faith had said before there's no need to worry but if there's no need to worry, then why is he knocking in urgency? No one knows why he suddenly quit. Now it seems like a lie. Lucy must have known otherwise why would he be here looking for
"Ein! Don't do anything!"
What? What is he planning to do? He doesn't have a gun or knife but there are lots of things inside the family room he can use as a weapon. He's stronger than Lucy. He's
"AH!"
Now is necessary to kick the door down which Jake would've been able to do with a few kicks if Lucy didn't open the door. "You're okay?" Amy asked anyway even though Ein looks more injured than she is. Lucy is still standing but rubbing her head. Ein is not and holding his knee. Ohh. Now it looks like Jake did quit and it's not because he no longer wants to work for Anthony since his behavior towards Ein is not that of someone who's ordered to look after him but rather someone who's more than just a concerned friend.
"What the hell?" Lucy asked since she's still not sure why Ein suddenly became aggressive. One moment he's talking about Ezz again and his failure to notice the ones that are the closest to him including Jake; then after hearing Jake's voice, he again tried to grab on while she was looking at the letter from Ezz. The letter could be fake. But one thing is certain. He didn't come alone for just one reason. "Why do you need that?" Others wouldn't know but did he think I didn't notice? It hurts. People grab on when they're in a vulnerable position but he wasn't in a vulnerable position at that moment. Some uses it for black magic to put a curse on their enemies. He's not that type that would believe in such things. Is he? "My hair, why do you need it?"
"Don't know what you're talking about."
"You put it in your pocket." Others let it go after pulling it but he held on.
"Ein?" Jake asked.
Never did she think that Jake would have anything to do with this. He's confused too. And never did she think that Ezz's child could be hers but Ein does.
-hours later-
Her child? That's impossible. She's not a man. Amy had wanted to say but didn't since there are two other possibilities that she never thought of but Ein did. It's because he thought that Lucy could be a trans-woman which sounded absolutely ridiculous but not to Ein. The other possibility is Ezz might not have used her own eggs because she wouldn't want her child to have the same genetic defect that killed her and their mother which sounded as impossible as the first. Lucy would never have her eggs frozen especially not at that young age. Would she? As impossible as it may seem, it's not to Ein because he was there when he first saw her as a guy sitting alone, looking depressed in a coffee shop in Iceland. He was there to witness her first time in skydiving and many times afterwards when not even he has the courage to do so. If I die, then I die. It was these words and the many times that she put himself in dangerous situations near the waterfalls and the ice caves, and the way she behaved that led him to believe that she's acting like someone who didn't care for her own life. And now, even Lucy can't be certain whether she did or not. If she did, then it can't be because Brooke left her. It must be because she didn't know when she would be killed by her enemies.
"If he is your son, whatever you decide to do, I will be with you." Amy said, holding Lucy in a hug. The truth will be known tomorrow. There's nothing she can do now. Certainly, regretting it won't help.
My son? That's impossible. But after getting Ein's explanation 2 hours ago, some things were starting to make sense. Ezz didn't want to talk about her son. Is it because she's afraid that I would find out the truth? It is for Ein. But he also couldn't continue to pretend that it doesn't matter. To raise his sister's son while knowing there's a possibility that his biological parent is the one who's partially responsible for her sister's death is a tough decision. And so is this. "Don't read that. Please." Lucy said.
Amy puts the book down after reading the back of the cover. There's no need to say please again. It's not an autobiography. It's fiction. It's mystery and fantasy but maybe there is some truth to it otherwise Ein wouldn't have came all this way to yell at her for still not being to remember who his sister is as if that can be controlled. Does he think that this book, written by his sister and recently published, will help? If so, then why won't she read it? Why doesn't she want anyone else to read it including Jake? It would be difficult to prevent him from doing so if Ein wants him too now that they're together. Jake could refuse but would he, knowing that Ein is already upset with him for having lied about Lucy's gender and refusing to disclose Lucy's location which ultimately forced him to snoop into his phone? Would Ein ask him to read it, knowing that Jake was already asked not to? Hopefully, trust between them is not broken to the point of break-up. Hopefully, Faith and Will would be able to control their curiosity. There's only one other person she has to worry about.
"CJ knows." That is out of anyone's control since CJ saw the book even though she doesn't know what happened. If she's asked not to, that might get her more curious. Even though CJ had once said she admired Lucy for her abilities and strength after finding out who she used to be, ever since last year her perception of Lucy has changed from gratitude and admiration to not giving a damn how she feels.
Lucy sighed loudly in frustration since there's nothing else she can do.