A/N- Happy Friday! So this chapter was already written when I was feeling better a few weeks ago. I've started on chapter 5 but everyday I wake up and don't know how the day is going to pan out with how I'm feeling. Hoping to get chapter 5 out next Friday but with me also writing 'A Twist of Fate' as well, I won't promise anything. Hope you all enjoy reading chapter 4 regardless! Bethany x
Chapter 4- Mixed Signals.
"Give me 5 minutes," Four says, then walks into the bar at the top of the mountain. He had said he needed to speak to someone inside, but that was it.
"Who'd you think it is?" I ask the group. This thing with Peter has meant he's been trying to show interest, meaning we're now one big happy family.
"Maybe it's his girlfriend," Edward guesses.
"Boring," Uriah chides, "I bet it's his long lost twin. They live on opposite sides of the globe, and meet at a summer camp- they both have one half of the other picture and when they put them together-"
"Uriah," I laugh, "stop plagiarism movies."
"Imagine, though," Lynn encourages, "two Fours. I think I would take the hit and fly home." Her sharp features pull upwards, her grin blinding.
"I wouldn't even want to imagine that," Peter replies, shivering. I feel him step closer, and our sleeves are touching.
"Maybe the twin would be the opposite to him. I don't think the balance of the world would last with two Four's roaming it." I grin as the others laugh, looking over my shoulder to make sure he's not behind me. I squint, trying to see if I can see through the glass doors. They're tinted, so there's no luck.
I feel Peter leave my side, walking over to the slope. He puts his hand over his eyebrows, looking out over the mountain.
Someone tugs on my arm, and I turn back around and see Uriah and Lynn staring strangely at me. "What?"
"What's up with you and Peter?" Lynn asks bluntly.
"You two have been acting strange for the past few days," Uriah adds on. "Is he threatening you?" He comes in close, whispering it to me.
"No!" I defend. "We just, talked things through. The day at the bar. We're good now."
They eye each other. "Don't do that!" I demand.
Uri holds up his hands in surrender, "Can't blame us. It's weird."
"How is it?" I ask. This is going to be just as hard as I thought. "We were all friends before, why can't we be now?"
"Because," Lynn draws out, "that was like 3 years ago. He's not the same."
"Hey, Tris! Come see this!" Peter shouts over.
I shrug to them, "It's worth a try?" I ski over, looking out over the slopes. "What is it?" I squint, not seeing anything.
"Literally nothing." He replies smoothly.
"Nice."
He points at the nothing, then looks at me with a forced smile, "Pretend it's something interesting."
"Is it that hard to give me a real smile, Peter?" I ask, but do what he says. I lean forward, pretend to see what he's pointing to, then look back at him nodding enthusiastically. This is exhausting.
"Tris! Peter! Back with the group." Four shouts over to us. I turn around and move back, Peter hot on my heels. "Try and pay attention." He tries to say emotionlessly. It probably did sound like that to everyone else, but he's staring straight at me. His eyes are burning.
What's with these mixed signals? He holds the door open for me one day, then tries to shoot lasers at me the other.
"We're going up higher, so everyone on the gondola."
I take my ski's off, and walk over to the gondola. They're not as common as the lifts, so it's always fun to get in one. I trudge through the thick snow, my friends just in front. I think we'll all fit in one-
Just as I'm about to step foot on the rubber floor, my feet are taken out from below me. A muscled arm picks me up from around my waist, and I'm moving backwards with them. I gaps, holding on tightly until they come to a halt.
"Let me down, Zeke!"
"Was that not fun?"
I take in a deep breath, trying to slow my heart rate. I push his chest in frustration. "No! Why would it?"
He smiles cheekily, "Well, I found it fun."
I shake my head, finding the smile in me, "Of course you did."
"Tris!" I hear Four shout. I look over at him, and see him hurrying over. When he sees Zeke, he slows down. "What the hell, Zeke? I thought one of my students just got swiped."
"Well, technically she did." He responds smugly. He then ruffles up my hair, and I realise my helmet must have flown off in the process. "Tell Uriah to keep his eyes peeled. I'm coming for him next." He flashes a playful smile, then makes his way over to the bar.
I look past Four, and see the trail of ski gear I dropped. I also see an empty gondola. "I told them to go ahead, they were holding up the line." We walk back over, picking up my things as we do. Four passes me my helmet, and I give him a soft smile.
"Thanks."
He shrugs, walking into the gondola. I follow him on, sitting on the bench opposite. He looks out the window as we head up, keeping to himself.
I find myself unable to do the same, my eyes finding him each time I try to look away. He's young, way younger than any other instructor I've had. He must be around Zeke and Shauna's age. When I think back to the two other instructors, I can now see the age difference. He's good at disguising it. When he puts that scowl on, he looks 5 years older. Right now, though, he looks relaxed, no features pulling in extreme positions.
"Did you need something, Tris?"
Having spaced out, I now realise we're eye to eye. I shake my head slowly, feeling my cheeks heat up. I look out my window, watching people ski and snowboard down the slopes. God, Tris, get a hold of yourself. I can feel him still looking at me, but I don't dare turn. He definitely thinks you're a freak.
I can feel the silence between us creeping all over my skin. How does he deal with this all the time?
"How old are you?" I blurt out. He reluctantly turns his attention back to me, looking bored. "I just mean- you look really young for an instructor, especially teaching advanced…"
He doesn't speak for a moment, instead just watches me with those harsh eyes. I don't think I breathe during those tense seconds.
"I'm 20." He says.
I wonder how much he must have been out here as a child to be at his level now. I'm nowhere near as good as he is, and he's only got 2 years on me. "You must have been on the slopes a lot as a child."
He shrugs, once again, and I feel like I'm getting nowhere with him. Is he really going to warm up? Or are we all stuck with an instructor who's always in the worst mood imaginable?
"Have I done something to you, Four?" I bravely ask, "because if I have-"
He stands up, opening the gondola doors. I look around, not realising we're already at the top.
"Remember your helmet." Is all he says, then walks out the door. I watch him go, feeling the energy rush out of me. Sighing, I grab my equipment, and follow him. So much for progress.
...
"How'd it go with you alone with Four in the lift?" Uriah asks in the boot room.
I hang my ski's up and kick off the heavy boots. "Awkward. He really didn't want to talk at all."
"Did you try?" Lynn asks next to me, sitting on the bench.
I nod, sitting next to her to put my shoes back on. "Yep. One thing I did get out of him was his age. He's only 20."
"Sounds like progress to me," Uriah says, looking impressed. I shrug. It didn't feel like it at the time.
I hear the door open, and look around, expecting the rest of our class to barge in. Instead, Four come in. He goes to the other side of the room, and begins removing his gear.
"Have you ever seen him here?" Lynn whispers to me. I shake my head. I thought he was set up elsewhere.
"Makes sense," I reply, "the other instructors get ready here, too." He must try to avoid us.
"Hey, Four!" Uriah jumps up, swinging on the bench poles. I follow him with my eyes, tensely watching him approach our instructor.
Four looks up, and from what I can see I think he's surprised. He looks behind him, to where me and Lynn are sitting.
I shrug to him, not knowing what Uriah's up to either.
"A few of us are going to the club tonight. Zeke and Shauna will be there so I was wondering if you'd like to join."
He shifts uncomfortably, and I can already tell his answer.
"I don't think-"
"Come on, Four! Maybe we can show you we're not half as bad as you think we are." I laugh, then turn it into a cough when I get a glare from Four.
"You coming, Tris?" Peter asks from the door leading to the stairs. I stand grudgingly, then straighten up when I remember we have an audience.
"I'll be right there," I reply, pulling my hoody on. I walk backwards, "See you two up there." I don't wait to hear Four's response to Uri's invitation, instead pushing Peter through the door.
...
I step out of the shower, grabbing my towel and wrapping it around me. I go to the mirror and wipe off the condensation. I look at my tired face, and rub my palms up and down it. Lying to everyone is starting to get to me. I ran up here when our lesson ended. I came straight into the bathroom, had a shower, and now I have to leave and face everyone. I bang my forehead on the mirror, wanting to disappear. Why did I agree to this?
I take a deep breath, and turn the door handle. Act normal, and maybe they won't say anything.
When I leave the bathroom, I have three sets of eyes burning into me. I forcefully smile, moving to the closet. Lynn hops off the top bunk, heading for the bathroom.
"You're in for it," She whispers as she moves past me. I shoot a glare at the back of her head.
I pull out a simple back mini dress, with spaghetti straps. I chuck it on the bed whilst I look for underwear. When I grab them, I turn back, still feeling their gaze. "Do you two have anything better to do than stare at me?"
I flop down on my bed, still wrapped in my towel. Feeling something under my back, I reach under me, pulling out my old teddy. I place him to the side, and grab my phone. Looking at the time, it's 5 o'clock. I've got ages until we leave.
"Tris," Christina says flatly. I look at her through Mar's bunk. She stands up, and comes and sits on the end of my bed. She still looks rough from skiing, her hair a platted mess. "You haven't shown one bit of interest in Peter since you broke up with him in year 10. Why have you all of a sudden become his best friend?" She looks doubtful.
"Just because I haven't talked to you guys about it doesn't mean I haven't been thinking about it." I push myself up, securing my towel as I go. "He's not at all what we thought he was like. If he was, I wouldn't be going anywhere near him." I look between the two, praying they'll believe me. It's only a small fib. "He's going to be at the club tonight. Talk to him and make the decision for yourselves."
Christina looks at Mar. They do some non verbal communication, then Christina turns back to me. "Fine. But it's still weird."
"Great!" I give them a tight smile. "Now, let's get onto the more interesting subject." I grin at Marlene, "Are you going to make a move on Uriah tonight?"
I watch her cheeks go beet red, and her hands fly up to cover them. "I wasn't planning to," she mumbles, pushing herself into the pillow.
"Come on, Mar!" Christina moans, "You've been at it for nearly 7 years! When are either of you going to find some guts?"
"I don't know," Mar sighs, "maybe I'm just scared that things will change. I like how we are now."
Christina laughs, "You do realise that you could kiss each other if you'd get together? There's a few other things people in relationships get to do-"
"Okay!" Mar exclaims, grinning. "Anyway, you know that we've kissed before. We've just been really drunk each time."
"Right," I say, "so no drinking tonight then. And if he rejects you- which he won't- just say that you were drunk." I shrug. "Easy."
"Easy is going down the green slopes," she shakes her head, "telling one of your best friends that you like like them is not."
"Hey!" Christina says, offended, "The green slopes are hard! Especially the danger of that massive gap between-"
"Yeah, yeah." I interrupt, and for it I get a weak slap on the arm. "Ow?"
Lynn walks out of the bathroom then, settling down next to Mar. Christina is up in an instant, dashing to the door.
"Let me do your make up tonight, Lynn?" Mar pleads, grabbing her damp hand. I watch as Lynn looks down at their hands. Something crossed her face, but it's gone just as quick as it came.
"Sure," Lynn replies. Mar squeals, jumps up and starts rummaging through her make up bag. I try to catch Lynn's eye, but she's looking anywhere but. Lynn's never showed interest in anyone before. And I don't know why I didn't see it sooner. I won't bring it up, not until she's decided to talk to me about it.
"How do you feel about blue eyeshadow?" Mar questions, holding up a colourful pallet.
Lynn, looking less than pleased, shakes her head at Mar. "Don't push it, Marlene."
Mar shrugs, "Okay then, Tris?"
...
The hours go by fast, and before I know it it's 11 and we've just left the hotel.
"I think the boys are already there," Mar says, eyes on her phone. It beeps, and she nods, "Uri's ordering the drinks now."
It's a short walk down to the centre of town, with the village being compact. It takes slightly longer than it should, with Mar and Christina wearing stupidly high heels. Most of the walk is a gentle decline, but it's steep enough that the girls are holding onto me and Lynn for dear life.
"If I can get drunk enough," Christina mutters as the road starts levelling out, "I can take these things off on the walk back."
Mar opens her mouth, but Christina's already on it, "No excuses! No drinking- at least not until you talk to him."
Mar groans, and I laugh, "Better get on it quick, then!"
We get to the end of the main street, and join a small line heading into the only lively looking building. We get through quickly, without needing to show any ID. I appreciate it. Ever since turning 18 at the start of the school year, I have been obsessively ID'd. The man at the corner shop takes personal pleasure in making me get it out each time I come in- even if I'm not buying anything age restricted.
We walk up a narrow staircase, getting closer and closer to the loud music. Christina pushes the heavy looking door open, and I'm blasted with sound.
"There's Uriah!" Christina shouts over the music. I follow her pointed hand, and can just about make the back of Uri's head out.
I turn to look back at Marlene, and see her unconsciously moving back towards the door. "Come on, Mar!" She shakes her unconvinced head at me, her light blonde curls wrapping around her face. "One courage drink?" I try to compromise.
Her eyes flicker to the packed bar, and hesitantly nod. "Great! Let's go then." Lynn somewhat pushes Mar over to our friends, and I follow behind Christina, letting her make a path through the mass of moving bodies.
Like he could sense us, Uriah's head turns around and makes eye contact with me. He grins as I put up a hand in greeting, but then his face falls slightly as his gaze moves to my right. A look of wonder flashers across, and I know he's looking at Marlene. In a tight, light pink dress, she looks like a dream.
"You, uh, ladies look beautiful," he says quickly, his eyes still on Mar. Her eyes are anywhere but. Uriah's always been the only one to bring out her shy side.
"You have no idea what I look like, Uri," Christina chuckles, patting him on his shoulder as she moves past him to stand with Will at the bar. I decide to leave Uri and Mar to it, giving Uriah, to him, a confusing thumbs up. I then grab what I assume is my drink off the bar.
I spot Al a few people down, and decide to solidify my case. I take a gulp of my drink, pleasantly pleased at the cocktail Uri had ordered. "Hey, Al," I greet, plopping myself into the stool next to him.
He gives me his signature teddy bear smile, and I get a strong whiff of lemongrass and sage. "Hey, Tris."
"What are you drinking?" I pry, grasping at conversation.
"Some sort of cheap beer," he shrugs. I see his eyes look down at my dress, all the way down to the cheap trainers on my feet. "You look-"
"Nice, Tris!" Peter exclaims behind me. I turn to him, a mixture of emotions rolling through me. "You clean up well. Kind of reminds me of the party in that field-"
"Peter," I warn, shaking my head ever so slightly, too far. I had hoped he was drunk enough to forget all about that night. 14 year olds and bottles of cheap wine do not mix well.
He rolls his eyes without much care, "Okay, okay." He grins down at me, his usually estranged face quite handsome, "Want to dance?"
I look to the crowded floor, and can think of a hundred different things I'd rather do than dance. One would be stabbing my eye out with a fork.
Like he can read my mind, he groans, "Come on, Tris! You used to love to dance!"
A surprised laugh bursts out of me, and I shake my head, "I don't know where you got that from, but I've never liked to dance."
"We used to dance all the time!"
I roll my eyes this time, "Yes. When we were both 5 minutes away from blacking out." I hold out my drink to him, showing the little that's been drunk, "Definitely not there yet."
"Fine," he sighs. "Let's go to one of the booths then." He turns around, scouting out the area. "Maybe…" His face lights up, and he points to one at the back sandwiched between two other booths, "That one!"
I look at the other booths, and can see why he thinks this is perfect. Nita, Myra and a few other of their friends are seated to the left. And then, when I look to the right, it feels as if my heart has leapt into my throat.
Sat with Zeke and Shauna, is Four. I feel my hands become sweaty and suddenly I don't know if I should go through with this plan. Do I really want Four thinking Peter and I are a thing? Is there a reason I care? I don't know, but it seems that this plan is starting to crack and crumble as each day passes.
"Come on, then!" Peter says, pulling me on the wrist. I give Al the best apologetic smile I can muster, then let Peter drag me to the booth.
He sits down so he's facing Nita, meaning that when I sit down, I get Four's face. I try to keep my eyes to myself, or on Peter, not wanting to make any awkward eye contact with our instructor. The last interaction we had was when he glared at me for snickering at him, but just before that it had felt somewhat natural. Why can't he be an easy read?
Peter shifts in closer, and I struggle to keep my eyes locked onto his. "Hold my hand," he whispers. I cringe, slowly making myself touch his skin. It feels weird and wrong. Hopefully Nita is easily jealous, and this situation won't last long.
"God, Tris, at least look like you're enjoying yourself."
"What's the point?" I whisper back, "She can't see my face."
I down the rest of my drink, and my leg starts to jitter, anxious to go get another. Or maybe I need the toilet.
"Pass me some money," I demand, flipping my hand around in his so my palm is facing upwards.
His brows pull, "Why?"
"So I can buy a drink?" I say flatly. Why else?
He grumbles something, then rattles around his pockets until he pulls out a 20. "Get me a beer."
"Of course," I said sweetly, sweeping out of the booth. I make a beeline to the toilet, needing to clear my head. I resist chucking water on my face, knowing Marlene would be livid if I ruined her make up job. Instead, I just sit on the toilet, reaching my neck back so my head is resting uncomfortable on the porcelain lid.
"-odd, though, right?" I suck in a breath and raise my feet in the air. Nita.
"They haven't said a word to each other for years and now they're all cushy together?" Myra adds, sounding stumped.
"Urgh! Why do I feel like this?" Nita moans. I hear her heels click on the floor as she paces back and forth. "And it's always with her! I didn't have a problem with him dating that girl in year 11 last year!"
I hear Myra sigh, and the faucet turns on, "Maybe it's because it was just a fling with that year 11. You know Peter and Tris have history."
I try to slow my breathing, but my body is in such an awkward position that it's becoming harder and harder to keep still. It's surprising, hearing what Peter has been telling me coming out of Nita's mouth. I hadn't really believed Nita to be jealous of Peter and I, and I certainly didn't think she was jealous of just me.
"Doesn't she have a thing with Uriah?" Nita snides. "Does she want to lay claim to all the good looking boys in our year?"
"Come on, Nita," Myra says lamely, "Tris is nice, she's always been friendly to all of us."
Another groan comes out of Nita, "Stop making me think logically! I want to be angry with someone!"
"Let's go out and grab another drink, get your mind off of him." I don't hear a response, but do hear heels clicking on the floor, and the toilet door opening and closing.
I burst up, feeling dizzy from the sudden change in position. I move out of the stall, watching myself in the mirror the entire time. I shouldn't have heard that, and I wish I hadn't. Something with Uriah? Do people think I have something going on with Uriah? And now Peter? And if Christina thinks Al likes me? Oh my God. What do the rest of the class think?
I stare at myself in the mirror, my eyes wide and warning. The sapphire eyeshadow surrounding my round blue eyes only brings out the colour more. I felt good leaving the hotel, but now I feel overdone. I pull down my dress as far as it will go- which is only inches. I look down at the running faucet, wondering if I should take it all off. I start to become itchy and agitated, feeling uncomfortable in my own skin.
No. I breathe in slowly, then let it out. I force the air into my lungs, expelling just as slow. It doesn't matter what the rest of the class, hell, the school thinks of me and my relationships. All that matters is my friends and I know who I am. Let the rest of the class assume I'm trying to get with every hot boy in the year.
Having settled my uneasy stomach, I storm out of the bathroom, ready to order however many cheap drinks I can until I'm all out of Peter's cash.
As I round the door frame, I come crashing into a hard wall. I smash my face into it, staggering back as quickly as I can. God, I've only had one drink.
A sudden wave of deja vu hits me as I feel large palms encompass my arms. Startled, I look up. Somewhat unsurprising, I find Four's face looking down at me, holding me up from being a mess on the floor.
I tense as I continue to stare incredulously into his deep eyes. Waiting for some type of rude comment or my body to be pushed out of the way-
"You okay?" He asks instead.
If my eyes could widen any further, I think they'd pop out of my face. My mouth opens and closes a few times, trying to come up with something in reply. Alcohol really loosens him up.
"Uh, yeah- yeah! I'm fine! I should really start watching where I'm going- what are the chances of hitting someone as huge as you two times!" I force out a laugh, then think about what I just blurted out. "Wait, no! I don't mean big as in big- I meant that you're hard to miss with all the height and muscle-" My cheeks are burning with each word that slips out my mouth, I try to clamp it closed, hoping to hold off on any more damage. "Please ignore everything I just said," I end weakly, looking anywhere but him.
I hear a chuckle come from where he's standing, and my eyes fling to him. It's true. He's laughing. Or at least as close to laughing as I think he's capable of. His spare upper lip is pulled upwards, and his eyes are just about creasing at their corners. If I had thought I knew how handsome this man was, well, he's off the scale now.
Speechless, I just continue to stare. What happened to this man in the past few hours? Is it really alcohol? I remember watching him interact with Shauna and Zeke on the slopes, how relaxed he had seemed then. Does that mean when Monday comes, he's going to be just as closed off as he has always been?
"I got what you were trying to say, Tris." He ends up saying, leaning into the wall. I put a slightly shaking hand to my forehead. Am I really having a civil conversation with my beastly instructor? His eye brows draw in, and concern takes over his face, "Are you okay?" He says as his hand starts to reach for my shaking one. I'm about to let him take it, but at the last minute pull it back to me.
"Yeah, no, I'm fine- it's not-"
"How much have you had to drink?" He asks instead, taking a step closer. "Do you need me to walk you back?"
I think I'd pass out from humiliation if Four thought I was 10 drinks in, walking me back to the hotel. "I've literally had one," I chuckle, embarrassed, "I don't know why I've got the shakes."
"Sit down for a bit," he instructs, moving me towards the wall. My shoulders start to heat up, like his hands are liquid fire. I do as he instructs, my mind only focused on how his palm covers my shoulders completely. I feel him squeeze me as I sit safely on the floor, back against the cold wall. I look up at him when we're shoulder to shoulder, and see he's already looking back at me.
"I didn't know you had it in you," I say softly, watching him through my eyelashes.
He raises a brow in question, "You didn't think I could be pleasant?"
"Is it really that surprising?" I counter, raising my brows back. I watch as a smirk appears on his face, and I'm beyond grateful to be sitting on the floor. I feel my hand twitch, but shove them into fists. What are you even thinking of doing, Tris?
"So are you going to forget this all happened and go back to ignoring me when we're in lesson?"
He dramatically sighs, turning his face away from me. "Who knows how I'll treat you on Monday. It's more of a mood thing."
I laugh, enjoying his looseness. It's mad to think about how young he is. He seems so much older on the slopes. But when that cheeky smile comes out and his face relaxes, I don't know how I ever thought he was any older than 20.
When his face turns back to mine, I only then realise how close we are. If I were to move just a few inches-
He seems to come to this conclusion at the same time, and I watch as his eyes darken. My attention is brought to his clenched hands, watching the veins contact and release.
I slowly look back up, and can't hold back. Maybe it's the alcohol in my system, maybe it's something else, but I want-
Shrieking from the end of the hallway breaks me out of my daze, and soon there's a good distance between the two of us. A group of girls come bounding down, not even taking notice of us against the wall. They move into the bathroom, happily ignorant to their surroundings.
When the door closes, a heavy silence floods in, despite the loudness from the club. I squeeze my eyes shut in frustration, take a breath, and pretend nothing happened.
I push myself up, then hold out a hand to Four, "We better get back. I'm sure people are wondering where we've gotten to." I give him a half lipped smile, waiting for him to take my hand in gesture.
He watches me for a moment, and my stomach twists. When he grabs my hand, my nerves spike and I feel like I'm burning.
He gets up, and stands there for a moment, hand still clasped in mine. I don't release it first, unable to deny how much I like the feel of his skin on mine. He nods, almost to himself, then removes his hand. "Let's go back in."
I nod after a beat, then trail behind him back to the rowdy club.