My name isn't important, or who I was before I opened my eyes to discover the world I've suddenly found myself in.

And chances are, this story won't be too.

While I'm not necessarily a party animal, I used to be quite the degenerate while partying. Booze, pills, snow, you name it and I've probably had a friend or two that got me into it, god knows how many videos there are of me on people's phones doing something stupid while drunk, high or both. The only difference being, I don't think I've ever had something so strong it'd thrust me right into the world of attack on titan or make me this contradictory when describing myself.

Of course, this isn't the type of story where I'd play mental gymnastics to justify that I wasn't actually in some Japanese man's coked-up fantasy that "vaguely" mirrors real-world events, but still inside of a car that is most definitely not a Honda Civic, trying to get some sleep before heading to the airport.

I decided, for my sake, that I'd be better off to accept everything around me as the truth.

And what is the truth anyway?

Skepticism and doubt, as René Descartes would put it, both seek to establish this foundation of knowledge that was absolutely certain and indubitable. This line of radical doubt, questions the reliability of the senses, and even that of the external world beyond one's own self. But this isn't a lecture philosophy, it's there to say that I am skeptical of this new yet familiar world I find myself in; I do doubt that the familiar upside-down faces I'm staring back at are those of real, breathing, thinking beings, I am quite uncertain of the credibility of the pain and nausea I'm currently experiencing.

While Descartes's argument has been a great subject of debate in the real world, I am not in the real world. No offense to Isayama, but these people's creator was a man with a self-admitted body hair/cuckolding fetish. I am not personally one to judge, but for me, that is reason enough to doubt everything around me even by a little.

But thanks to my time on the internet, I've concluded that ultimately, it is what it is.

Also, the two "s's and the second ,"e" in Descartes are silent, but only if you're an annoying person.

A mentally challenged friend of mine once said everything was a 50/50, you either wake up in the morning or you don't, you either go to work or not, that 6th and final chamber of the revolver of which you are certain there's a bullet inside either kills you or doesn't. In that same line of thinking, I'm here or I'm rotting in an alleged Honda Civic and my decaying, endorphin secreting brain is flashing me these images.

So, that's how I came to accept that I am in fact, Eren Yeager.

And that fact scares me.

A part of me was unsure at first, but as soon as I heard this inner monologue that to me sounded exactly in the voice of one Eren Yeager and remembered the vague events in my mind. I quickly concluded that I'm back at the start of the story, where Eren originally ate shit in front of everybody and fell upside down during that balance test.

And that's where I currently was, hanging upside down, staring back in embarassment at the cadets and instructors alike. That bald fucker Shadis would pay for this.

To be honest, It's a good thing I was Eren, I'd have probably killed myself if I was anybody else, especially Reiner. I was a bit surprised I wasn't Floch, but then again, I already had been, in a way.

Try as I might, I could not bring myself back up, pathetically struggling to rise to my feet as those around me watched with barely contained laughter. The thing is, it really was hard to get used to a new body, especially that which is half my age compared to my previous life, and less developed on top of it. It was like perpetually using too much strength to pick up a bottle you thought was a bit full, only to find out it was empty.

So, being the calm and collected person I was, I endured and slowly adapted.

"EREN! CAN YOU HEAR ME!?" Some asshole shouted at the sky, startling me and those around him.

"WHAT!?" I called out in frustration from my position, upside down and flailing desperately.

He blinked, everyone's eyes now on him. "You're terrible at this!" he hastily deflected. The trainees burst into laughter as I ground my teeth begrudgingly. I dislike being the butt of a stranger's joke, not one bit.

"Nice one, Floch! serves him right for that shitty tough guy act he put on yesterday!" Jean (Who I immediately recognized.) patted him on the back from behind, wheezing.

"Oh, it's just Floch." I muttered slowly to myself, before promptly giving up attempting to get back on my feet. "Floch's cool I guess." I calmed down and waited until they lowered me from the training posts.

Once I was back on my feet, I did a small walk of shame as I scanned everyone and everything around me. Inwardly, my heart was beating in a way that felt like it could come bursting out, a palpable anxiety in my chest to match, this icy feeling seeping through my sweaty back and crawling over my skin. I found Mikasa among the crowds of cadets and joined her side, that's what Eren would do right? Or should I try to look for Armin?

"It's fine if you don't get it on your first try, Eren, there's always next time." She assured me, and I curtly nodded at her without meeting her gaze. I tried to think but my mind was drawing blanks, I sighed under my breath and looked around with a bored expression, still coming to terms with what's happening to me.

And then, a thought occurred inside my head, I wasn't just in attack on titan was I? I've seen stuff like this before, I'm being watched in Live or animated form or my thoughts, actions and surroundings are being written about in a mediocre way that vaguely shows the setting I'm in and to those unfamiliar with the beginning of the story, I might as well be in the heart of Paris being gawked at by disappointed Chinese tourists and it wouldn't make a difference in terms of what's happening around me.

Yeah, this was the training grounds for the cadet corps southern division alright, just north-west of Trost. The place looked arid, the gusts of wind felt warm, we were about to enter the summer, beyond the clearing where the training camp sat there were a few surrounding forests. Did I mention the sky was blue and partly cloudy? A group of Pre-teen and young teen cadets are standing around me, all of them look much older than their actual age.

It's been close to ten minutes since my mysterious transportation here, if anyone can hear my thoughts, I doubt it will ever be explained. The best-case scenario is that those three and a half nights of not sleeping are finally catching up to me. I wondered why the starting point always had to be this training ground, why not Shiganshina? Would it have killed me to start there before the wall fell? Was I that unlucky that the world decided not to risk a stray boulder being hurled my direction?

Floch walked up to the training post, since when was he so good at balancing himself like that? Looks like Mikasa has competition.

Oh right, I guess this is the part where I go on tangents about what my motivations are and what I plan to do in the future. So, I am Eren, currently twelve years old, have the power of a god laying dormant inside of me, and I'm in a world of giant cannibals, great. Well... there are worse fates, I could have been (Reincarnated into?) a Liverpool fan.

Thankfully, I was writing my fanfic just the other day so I remember quite a lot about this world, I should probably write some important stuff later so I won't forget, because I'm only human after all. I suppose that, in the end, I'd like to see an ending that Eren never got to achieve for himself. I've known for a while now that, that scenery, was a nothingburger in my own opinion. I wanted a real scenery to feast my eyes upon, and that meant doing the rumbling.

Some might argue that it's too extreme, and that with my capabilities I should strive to seek a more peaceful resolution but between being surrounded by comically racist xenophobes and getting to watch them turn into hot paste beneath my feet as I enjoy ultimate power, the latter is more appealing. Let's not kid ourselves here, this is a power fantasy through and through, you want peacekeeping? Join the united nations.

Now, the key question that will plague my thoughts for the next few metaphorical paragraphs of my psyche. Do I have the energy to play out this story the right way, or my way?

The right way, which is to meticulously plan everything (But I'll keep that hidden.) and train for about five chapters worth of development to show my growth as a character both mentally and physically then ultimately end up not doing anything too drastic in fear of deviating too much from the main canon, maybe interfere here and there and pray to god it doesn't backfire but in the end I'll be doing more reaping than sowing so it doesn't matter.

Or I can do it my way, which is to kill all the bad apples as soon as I'm able to figure out how to transform and then run to hug my half-brother and tell him how much I missed him.

I stroked my metaphorical chin as I thought about this and considered both options.

One held promises of a fun and engaging story, with "cleverly" disguised plot holes that could be swept under the rug with enough development and plot twists that kept you on your toes all to make you forget this story has several glaring issues, while the other one was a one-shot.

I suddenly frowned, I am in a story aren't I? What happens if I reach the end? Life goes on? Everything goes black? I'm eternally stuck in the last written scene in limbo? What if it's one of those stories where it just ends on a terrible cliffhanger?

After all, the few stories in which Eren Yeager gets to have a happy ending are ones where he gets his back blown by Levi Ackermann.

Oh right, speaking of Levi, I need to think about the literal, living, thinking beings surrounding me and what I plan to do with them in the future. This wasn't one of my stories anymore, where I had to be unbiased to all my characters, I've been a Yeagerist for years now. I agree that Erwin was the right choice, that the rumbling was justified, that Floch was right, and that Eren- I, did nothing wrong. I never let it bleed into my writing too much, but I agreed to all of these points.

I looked around, spotting Reiner, Bertholdt, and Annie. Afterwards, my eyes fell on Armin, Jean, Mikasa, Sasha and Connie. There wasn't really a seething rage within me seeing all of them again, their betrayal might have upset me a little, but here? They were just another face in the crowd for me. Of course, the first three would need to die for my convenience and the rest would need to be kept in check. I wouldn't want my indifference to be mistaken for complacency.

Unlike Eren, I'm not that emotionally attached to any of them, save for few of my favorite characters. It wasn't my mother that I had condemned to be eaten by titans; it wasn't my father that passed on his powers to me, this wasn't even my home... but it might as well be if this turns out to be more than just a fever dream. This training ground, these people, this entire island, no, this entire world, it was now my playground. And I only say that because I am pretty much god, I just uhmm... you know, Need to find my half-brother first and give him a fist bump.

I grimaced a little, thinking back on all the shit Eren had to originally go through. I had my fair share of scraps in the past but... I've never felt what's it like to be impaled by a piece of wood, or to have my limbs chopped off regularly, or to bite down on my hand hard enough to draw blood. Hell, I've never even broken a bone in my body yet let alone getting my head chopped off by an Anti-material rifle.

This was definitely going to suck really fucking bad before it gets better for me, I casually felt the muscle I had on this new body to get an idea of what I'd be working with and then sighed again. How the fuck am I supposed to gain more muscle on a diet of stale bread and half-assed vegetable soup? This isn't something that gaining a few memories from Historia could fix.

I carried on regardless, for now, I had to blend in with the masses and pretend everything was alright. But inwardly, I knew I needed to think this through carefully.

Mikasa and Armin hadn't noticed the subtle shift in character, partly because I remembered that as long as I kept looking pissed off and grunted every once in a while, they wouldn't question my behavior for now. That was another thing, this girl next to me was the Queen, prime minister and speaker of my fanclub and she can currently read me like a book. She knows my social cues better than I can recite the alphabet, she would know if something was up wouldn't she?

And then there was Armin, I needed to avoid giving the colossal titan to him, I'd rather have him inhaling crack like it was oxygen than to ever allow him to consume Bertholdt ever again. Advocating for peace is one thing, but inheriting incompetence from another shifter was an entirely different can of worms. If things go smoothly, my Armin would not be doing fuck all for four years speaking to some terrorist in a crystal coffin. My Armin would be putting more people in coffins for the sake of the ocean.

In case it wasn't obvious by now, I was already thinking about genociding billions outside of this island. Merely out of sheer spite than anything, but only if it was necessary. Then again, I should probably give peace a chance first, hmmm, no, I have a feeling that peace wouldn't be possible. I have to do the rumbling but ONLY in the case of self defense, BUT if an opportunity for peace presents itself, I'll take it! But in the end, I'll do the rumbling no matter what, and that was final.

My intentions are super clear and obvious, see?

"If you write, you update, if you procrastinate, you abandon, if you don't write, you can't fanfic!" - UberKreisler 2023 AD, talking to himself as he watches all of his stories sit without updates for months.

With that said, the test was finally concluded for the day and it was time for us to... I'm not sure, they never show what happens in between scenes. I followed after the rest as they made their way to the barracks, most opted to change out of their uniforms and into something casual, the rest remained as they were and lingered around the barracks to chat.

I myself found myself listening in to a conversation between Connie and Thomas, I had nearly forgotten that guy had I not been writing about him in one of my fanfics. I sighed again, and frowned, remembering that I had absolutely no idea how to balance myself on that ODM training post. My foot tapped nervously against the wooden floor, I had to go practice that shit before I get myself booted out of this training camp.

Once enough time sufficiently passed and I felt well-rested, I stood up to resume the task, bringing Mikasa and Armin along with me. You know, to stay in character in front of them. I knew full well my belt was tampered with, but if the original Eren could do it, then I wouldn't bitch my way out of this.

Mikasa helped strap me to the post, and I nodded at Armin was about to lift me up when suddenly a distant voice stopped us.

"Stop it!" He barked. We all paused our exercise and turned to face him.

My eyes widened, it was Floch. I inwardly panicked at this, I had forgotten about him completely! How ironic! What the hell would Eren say in this situation? I racked my brain to think of something then blurted out the first thing that came to mind, improvising on the spot.

"What the hell do you want Forster?!" I demanded in agitation, Mikasa stepping in front of me to shield me. Floch sneered at the Oriental girl without a single ounce of fear, standing his ground against her. "I'm not in the mood for more of your stupid jokes!" I added, hoping he'd leave so I could carry on.

"Armin, right? Don't raise him, he'll hurt himself." Floch advised the blonde-haired boy who in question raised an eyebrow at him, completely ignoring me and pissing me off as a result.

"Could you fuck off? I don't have the time to deal with you right now." I growled at him, if I didn't get this down soon, the story would change too much!

Armin looked sheepishly at the both of us, unexpectedly, he turned to me, "Let's talk things out first, Eren. He might be able to help us!" He enthusiastically reasoned with me and I gritted my teeth in frustration before ultimately relenting. This day couldn't get any fucking worse anyway.

"Fine, but nothing is stopping me from kicking his ass if he does something stupid." I warned Floch fixing him a glare, I know what he's capable of.

"Great, I'm glad you can be reasoned with." Floch spoke as he removed his ODM belt. "Take this, put it on instead." Floch spoke, before tossing the belt towards us. Mikasa intercepted it mid-air and gave him a curious look.

"Your belt?" Armin questioned before a spark lit up in his mind. "That's right! We didn't stop to consider if it wasn't your fault! Eren! Your belt could have been faulty!" He beamed as he turned to me, filling me with perplexion, what was happening right now?

"What the hell's the meaning of this?!" I puzzled, "You had everyone laugh at me earlier, so why do this now?" I added, wasn't he just supposed to make fun of me and that's it?

Floch was in the middle of leaving before he stopped and turned to face us, smirking. "Are you seriously complaining? I just felt bad for you that's all, if that fat ass Lucas could do it then something must have been very wrong for you not to be able to." He replied, before shrugging. "Besides, I've seen the way you tried to balance yourself, it didn't look natural so It made me suspicious that something else was going on." He concluded, stunning us into silence.

"That's..." I trailed, unsure of what to say.

"Well? Aren't you going to try it?" Floch asked.

We blinked, snapping out of our stupor before Mikasa moved in to help me remove the wires attached to my malfunctioning belt, but Floch left before he could see me pull it off. By the time he reached the mess hall I excitedly shouted up at the sky after getting this down on the first try, god was I a fucking natural, I impress myself sometimes.

But then I suddenly froze, hanging from that training post and gazing ahead with a sudden look of realization. Floch wasn't supposed to do any of that, none of that was canon, he practically didn't exist before the return to Shiganshina and yet here he was helping me out on day one, this isn't the canon storyline. And then it struck me like a freight train.

I've been inserted into my own fucking story.

"Oh man, this is getting pretty intense, I wonder what happens next?" - UberKreisler 2024 AD, while reading the latest chapter of Seeking the devil and forgetting he's the one who has to write what happens next to find out.

I watched him from across the mess hall as he went through his silly little mental breakdown.

His friend Gordon was placing breadcrumbs on his greasy head and that other one, Sandra, was chastising him for it. This was strange, not going to lie, it was like watching your kids at the playground, except you knowingly let your son fall face first to crack open his skull without lifting a finger. Watching the scene unfold was eating away at my patience, I have to speak to the guy after all, so why did I have to fucking write an interaction between them in the first place?

I sighed. Me and my pretentious writing...

The bell suddenly rang and I excused myself, leaving Armin and Mikasa behind with the rest as a I handed in my bowl and spoon. I knew full well where the redhaired bastard would walk to, after all, I wrote it.

Seconds turned to minutes, and before I knew it, I saw him approaching as I waited behind the corner then grabbed him from behind and dragged him back before slamming his back against the wall. He looked back at me with wide disbelieving eyes, his mouth opening and closing several times in shock.

"E-Eren, what are you doing?"

"Let's cut the shit, you're from the future right?" I immediately said, and watched as he went through several emotions before his gaze widened in awe this time.

"Y-you're here too? I'm not the only one..." He muttered under his breath, I swear I could hear relief in his voice. His gaze suddenly steeled with worry. "What the hell happened? Did you finish the job? Why are we both back here, Eren?"

It was my turn to be caught off guard now, I froze, not knowing what to say.

Yo Floch, thanks for the contribution buddy! But uhh, no, we didn't finish the job. In fact, I didn't finish anything! I died on purpose and then our home got nuked a few generations later and I did it because I was an idiot! Also I did it because of my friends, mostly Mikasa, since it's what Ymir wanted. And only Ymir knew for sure why any of that happened the way it did!

Yeah, he'd kill me on the spot, in fact, I once wrote a scene like that as a joke.

I decided to just lie to him, since he'd be doing quite a lot of that himself in the coming years. "I did it, Eldia is saved... but, for some reason I'm back here again and apparently you are too." I said, as I drew back my hands from him, "Had you not approached me like that, I would have thought I was the only one."

His eyes shone brightly back at me, and I could have sworn I felt a pang of guilt in my heart. "So... our homeland was saved? The people there can live free after all... We did it?! It wasn't... It wasn't all in vain!" He cried out in joy, tears building up in his eyes.

I had to urge him not to shout, in fear of nearby listeners. "Keep it down!" I hissed in a hushed tone.

"S-sorry, I'm sorry, you're right. I just can't help myself." He replied in a flustered manner, wiping away the tears with his sleeves as he chuckled warmly. His eyes suddenly hardened. "So, we must do it all over again." He stated solemnly, "Can't say I'm looking forward to it, but with you here, I'm actually excited to see the stupid looks on their faces when we take 'em by surprise."

I nodded, giving a smile of my own. "Seems that way to me. Reiner, Bertholdt, and Annie need to be dealt with immediately. I've been thinking of how to take them down ever since I got back here. I just need to get over the initial hurdle of my first transformation." I lied, but I was determined to make it right to him.

He hummed back at me. "Then it'll be a cake walk this time around, those three bastards back there won't know what hit 'em."

"Yeah, this is good actually. We're on the same page then?"

"We were ever not? Of course," Floch nodded. "We build back up from scratch, we have commander Erwin to work with this time too, and the government won't pose any threat thanks to you, so we can start moving from the shadows as early as now if you'd like." He offered, damn, why didn't I write him this way in my original story? Oh right, it'd be over in five chapters max.

"If I remember correctly, we'll be going on missions outside the camp, those could be great opportunities to not only get the hang of your titan shifting again but to ambush those three when they least expect it." He supplied.

"Of course." I nodded. "I think... I'd like to make new plans this time around, our first run was heavily dependent on luck and the incompetence of our peers. I'd like something more stable. Think we can get that Reiss bastard as our new host?" Floch intially looked confused, before I elaborated. "Zeke nearly got the drop on me when I activated the founder, this entire plan would have all been for nothing had I not acted swiftly."

He gave me a look of understanding, visibly unsettled at that near possibility. "I see, so you'd like someone less experienced with being a titan to act as the conductor for the coordinate." He concluded, and I nodded back at him in confirmation.

"Precisely."

"Smart, can't risk something like that again."

"Also.." I trailed, there were a few important people I needed to remind him about. "There's Ymir in the picture too, and Historia. We need them."

His eyes momentarily widened. "Shit, I forgot about Ymir, she's been dead that long already so I couldn't even remember her face. She had the Jaws didn't she? We can't let her give it back to Marley again." He said, giving me an impressed look. "Good call, it would have totally slipped my mind."

"Indeed." I said, trying to sound cool, he really knew how to praise a person.

He extended a hand forward, smirking. "So, partners again?"

I looked down at the hand, then met his eyes and nodded. "You bet your ass, Forster." And with that we firmly shook hands.

I suddenly frowned, it felt like something was missing from the picture, something I've yet to think about. Let's revisit the facts, I'm in the world of Attack on Titan, I've been inserted as Eren Yeager, I'm in the past with so much knowledge, I have so much power that it's not even funny to think about, and the world's most active shooter is shaking my hand.

What else am I forgetting? What else do I really need in this coked-up self-indulgent power fantasy I find myself inside of? What could be that crucial piece of the puzzle that would make me feel whole? What do I, as a character with my quirks and flaws need a the moment more than anything?

My eyes lit up with a realization, several names flashing through my mind, how could I have been so blind?! It was obvious from the start.

Floch, Historia, Mikasa, Armin, Ymir, Annie, Jean, Connie, Sasha, the list went on.

I looked Floch dead in the eyes and spoke with sheer confidence and determination.

"I need a harem."

Floch wasn't sure he heard right.

"What?"

End of first chapter, thanks for reading!

As you can tell, this is a very very serious story and I will need my readers to approach it with a high level of sophistication before they even think of reviewing it, you need to have at least 200 IQ to critique me and give me your opinion, as a matter of fact, you'll need to email me an approved IQ test score before you think of letting me know what you think so far.

Anyway, jokes aside, hope you enjoyed readng this new story and see you again soon!