The Warriors: From Zero to Hero
Chapter 33
The Warriors were happy Hercules won the fight against the hydra and the muses were singing a song for him but Hades was very angry
While the gang was celebrating Hercules's victory we head back to the muses
From that day forward, our boy Hercules could do no wrong. He was so hot, steam looked cool. Calliope said
(Oh yeah!)
(Bless my soul.)
(Herc was on a roll.)
(Person of the week.)
(In every greek opinion poll.)
(What a pro!)
(Herc could stop a show.)
(Point him at a monster and you're talkin' S.R.O.)
(He was a no one!)
(A zero a zero.)
(Now he's a honcho!)
(He's a hero!)
(He was a kid with his act down pat!)
(Zero to Hero in no time flat!)
(Zero to Hero!)
(Just like that!)
(When he smiled the girls went wild!)
(With oohs and aahs!)
(And they slapped his face.)
(On every vase!)
(On every "Vahse"!)
(From appearance fees and royalties.)
(Our Herc had cash to burn.)
(Now nouveau riche and famous.)
(He could tell you what's a grecian urn.)
(Say amen.)
(There he goes again.)
(Sweet and undefeated.)
(And an awesome ten for ten.)
(Folks lined up.)
(Just to watch him flex.)
(And this perfect package packed.)
(A pair of pretty pecs.)
(Hercie he comes he sees he conquers.)
(Honey the crowds were goin' bonkers.)
(He showed the moxie brains and spunk.)
(Yeah!)
(From Zero to Hero.)
(A major hunk.)
(Zero to Hero.)
(And who'd have thunk?)
(Who put the glad in gladiator?)
(Hercules!)
(Who's darin' deeds are great theater?)
(Hercules!)
(Is he bold?)
(No one braver!)
(Is he sweet?)
(Our favorite flavor!)
(Hercules!)
(My man!)
(Hercules!)
(Hercules!)
(Hercules!)
(Look at my.)
(Hercules!)
(Hercules!)
(Hercules!)
(Bless my soul.)
(Herc was on a roll.)
(Undefeated.)
(Riding high.)
(And the nicest guy.)
(Not conceited.)
(He was a nothing.)
(Zero zero.)
(Now he's a honcho.)
(He's our hero!)
(He hit the heights at breakneck speed.)
(From Zero to Hero.)
(Herc is a hero.)
(Now he's a hero.)
(Yes indeed.)
Hades was very angry while he was practicing shooting at targets
Pull! Hades said
Pain and Panic pull out a target and Hades shoots a fireball at it
Nice shooting, Rex. Meg said
I can't believe this guy. Hades said
Tell me about it. Lobo said
Indeed. Vilgax said
I mean i throw everything i've got at him. And it doesn't even... Hades said
Hades sees Pain was wearing something below
Pain? Hades said
Yeah? Pain said
What are those? Hades said
What? Pain said
What are those? Hades said
Pain was wearing Hercules's trademark sandals on his feet
Um...i don't know. Pain said
What? Hades said
I thought they looked kinda dashing. Pain said
Are you kidding me? Hades said
Huh? Pain said
I've got 24 hours to get rid of this bozo, or the entire scheme i've been setting up for 18 years goes up in smoke and you are wearing his merchandise! Hades said
Panic interrupts them by slurping some cola from a Hercules trademark plastic cup
What is that? Hades said
Huh? Panic said
What is that? Hades said
Uh...soda? Panic said
Soda? Hades said
Yeah. Panic said
Soda? Hades said
Thirsty? Panic said
Hades yells and causes a small earthquake in the area
Whoa. Lobo said
That was intense. Vilgax said
Sorry. I needed to blow off some steam. Hades said
Yeah. Lobo said
Clearly. Vilgax said
Anyway. Did you two take care of those other people? Hades said
Nope. Lobo said
Nope? Hades said
Yeah. Nope. Lobo said
What do you mean nope? Hades said
Well uh... Lobo said
Yeah? Hades said
Uh... Lobo said
Yeah? Hades said
We failed. Vilgax said
What? Hades said
I said we failed. Vilgax said
Failed? Hades said
Yes. Vilgax said
So they're... Hades said
Alive? Yes. Vilgax said
Are you kidding me? Hades said
Yeah. Lobo said
We are sorry. Vilgax said
Are you kidding me? Hades said
Well well well. Meg said
What? Hades said
Looks like your game's over. Meg said
Excuse me? Hades said
Wonderboy is hitting every curve you throw at him. Meg said
Really? Hades said
Yeah. Really. Meg said
Oh yeah. Hades said
What? Meg said
I wonder if maybe i haven't been throwing the right curves at him. Hades said
What? Meg said
Meg, my sweet. Hades said
Don't even go there. Meg said
There's gotta be something. Lobo said
Maybe he has a weakness? Vilgax said
Weakness? Hades said
Yes. Vilgax said
That's it. Hades said
I'm sorry what now? Meg said
He has a weakness. Hades said
Really? Meg said
Yeah. Hades said
No way. Meg said
See, he's gotta have a weakness, because everybody's got a weakness. Hades said
Again. Really? Meg said
Yeah. Hades said
Example? Meg said
I mean for what? Pandora, it was the box thing, for the Trojans, hey, they bet on the wrong horse, okay? Hades said
What's your point? Meg said
We simply need to find out Wonderboy's. Hades said
So you wanna know his weakness huh? Meg said
Yeah. Lobo said
Of course. Vilgax said
Obviously. Hades said
No way. Meg said
What? Hades said
I've done my part. Get your little imps... Meg said
They couldn't handle him as a baby. Hades said
So? Meg said
I need someone who can...handle him as a man. Hades said
And that's me huh? Meg said
Exactly. Hades said
Not gonna happen. Meg said
Oh come on. Hades said
Hey, i've sworn off manhandling. Meg said
Well, you know, that's good because that's what got you into the jam in the first place, isn't it? Hades said
Wait...she did something? Lobo said
You could say that. Hades said
What is it? Lobo said
I have a story for you guys. Hades said
A story? Lobo said
Yeah. Hades said
Tell us. Lobo said
I want to hear it as well. Vilgax said
Okay. Hades said
Please don't tell them the story. Meg said
Too bad. I'm telling them and you should hear it as well. Hades said
(Groans) Meg groaned
You remember don't you Meg? Hades said
Yeah. I do. Meg said
You sold your soul to me to save your boyfriend's life. Hades said
Stop. Meg said
And how does this creep thank you? Hades said
Stop. Meg said
By running off with some babe. Hades said
(Groans) Meg groaned
That's pathetic. Lobo said
Very pathetic. Vilgax said
Yeah, it is. Hades said
Did you really have to tell them the story? Meg said
Yeah. They're cool. And besides... Hades said
Besides what? Meg said
He hurt you real bad, didn't he, Meg? Huh? Hades said
Look, i learned my lesson, okay? Meg said
Which is exactly why i got a feelin' you're gonna leap at my new offer. Hades said
Which is? Meg said
You give me the key to bringing down wonder breath and i give you the thing that you crave most in the entire cosmos. Hades said
What's that? Meg said
Hades then whispers two words to Meg's ear
Your freedom. Hades said
Meg drops a pot after hearing what Hades said
Seriously? Meg said
Yeah. Hades said
My freedom? Meg said
Yeah. Hades said
You're kidding. Meg said
I'm not kidding. I'm serious. Hades said
Oh. Meg said
So what do you say? Hades said
(Sighs) Meg sighed
You find Wonderboy's weakness and i'll let you. Hades said
(Sighs) Meg sighed
Come on. Hades said
Meg thought about it for a moment until she decided
Alright. I'll do it. Meg said
Great. Hades said
But after this, we're done. Okay? Meg said
Of course. Hades said
So where is he? Meg said
He's probably at some fancy house or something. Hades said
Alright. I'll go with that. Meg said
Good luck. Hades said
Whatever. Meg said
Meg then left to go find Hercules and find his weakness
So if she finds his weakness. You're gonna let her go? Lobo said
Yup. Hades said
Are you sure? Vilgax said
Of course. Hades said
Hades has sent Meg to go find Hercules and see if she can also find his weakness stay tuned
TO BE CONTINUED