Responding to reviews
Tjm: Bridgette just got out, same with Courtney not to mention her arc is worsened if she merges + Izzy is funny and she actually shines in the merge. Glad you found the April Fools joke funny.
"Last time on Total Drama Island…" Chris began the recap. "The Bass and Gopher teams were disbanded into a Battle of the Sexes challenge that put their taste buds to the puke test. With bovine testicles, live bug insect pizza, and liquid roach juice on the menu, not only was this the single biggest retch fest this host has ever seen, but Owen's obscene consumption habits finally paid off and scored a big win for his comrades. While the guys set sail aboard a weekend retreat on the S.S. Lap o' Luxury, the girls set down territorial tape, forcing newcomer Bridgette to choose sides, that didn't last long though since she was sent packing due to not wanting to eat dolphin weiners. Now that Heather's drawn the line, will Leshawna cross the line? Will Gwen shreds the line? And can Lindsay recognize any line that's not a tan line? For the answers to all these cliffhangers and more, stay tuned to the most exciting episode yet on Total. Drama. Island!" Chris ended the recap.
(Theme song)
The episode began with Heather, Lindsay and Leshawna sitting on chairs in front of the dock while Gwen was sitting on it and they were all glaring at each other. Suddenly a fly landed on Heather's face, she tried to swat it but was hit with a magazine by Lindsay.
"Ugh!" Heather groaned in pain.
"O-Oops…" Lindsay said.
"Lindsay, you are a total–" Heather tried to say but was interrupted by a boat noise. The guys came back with the cruise and Owen, Trent, Duncan, DJ and Harold were dancing on it. They slid down the boat and landed on the dock.
"What a weekend! Woowee!" Duncan said.
"Oh, sweet mother of mirth! You can't buy that kind of fun!" Owen agreed.
"I think Owen and DJ took a real shine to those lovely ladies who served us hand and foot." Duncan said.
"Hello! The spa treatments? My alligator elbows, totally gone!" DJ said, showing his elbows.
"Ooh. Like velvet." Owen said, looking at his elbows.
Confessional: Leshawna
"Psh. Those should've been my alligator elbows getting the hand and foot treatment!" Leshawna said.
Suddenly a crying noise came from the boat.
"Ooh. Sounds like Geoff's still having a hard time accepting Bridgette's been kicked off, huh?" Owen said.
"Yeah. He's so weak." Duncan said.
"I'll go get him." DJ said and went towards the boat.
Confessional: Geoff
"Baby come back! Any kind of fool could see! S-Something... something, uh... about you! Hey, Bridge! Sendin' out mucho love to... wherever it is that the Boat of Losers takes you!" Geoff badly sung.
"Come on man." DJ said as he came out of the boat with Geoff.
"That a boy... hug it out!" Owen said and hugged Geoff.
"Come on man, my girlfriend got voted and you don't see me complaining!" Duncan said.
"Actually-" Harold tried to say but was interrupted.
"Don't say anything." Duncan said which made Harold shut up.
"Anyway man, Bridgette being gone happens, you still got your mind in the game." Duncan asked.
"I don't know man. Going on without Bridge is like… Oh... is that bacon? Aw, crap! Did I miss breakfast?" Geoff said as he smelled Duncan.
"I'll take that as a yes." Duncan said.
"Anyone care for a chocolate coated cherry blossom?" Harold asked the girls who were all glaring at him while holding a plate of chocolates. Leshawna responded by throwing a slipper which hit the chocolates and sent them into the water. "No!" he whined.
"It's okay, dude. The ladies are just a little jealous." Owen said.
"Yeah, who can blame 'em? They can barely stand each other, and meanwhile, us guys are tighter than family! Guys rule!" Duncan cheered.
"You got it." DJ said.
"I love you guys." Owen said.
"Yeah baby!" Geoff cheered.
"Wicked!" Harold said.
"Listen up, campers! As of right now, all teams are officially dissolved. From here on in, it's every camper for themselves!" Chris announced from the loudspeaker.
"Ahem, well, uh, it's about time we flew solo." Duncan said as the guys all glared at each other.
"Oh-ho-ho, I am feelin' that! Bring it on, Chris!" Leshawna said.
"Then get ready for this!" Chris said from the loudspeaker as a boat carrying an angry looking Eva came to the dock.
"You're frontin' me." Leshawna said.
"What? But that's impossible." Heather said.
"Aw man, what is she doing here?" Harold said.
"Back by popular audience demand, it's Eva!" Chris said from the loudspeaker.
"That's right. I'm back. And just to be clear, not only am I gonna kick butt, but I'm giving special attention to everyone who wronged me!" Eva said.
"Wait a sec. You said no one is allowed back." Gwen told Chris.
"I did?" Chris said from the loudspeaker.
"And once you leave…" Gwen reminded.
(Flashback) "And once you leave on the Dock of Shame, on the Boat of Losers, you can never, ever, ever, ever come back." Chris said.
"Oh yeah. That. Yeah, I lied." Chris said from the loudspeaker.
"You can't do that, it's not fair!" Gwen complained.
"Whoa. Girl, you're reasoning with a loudspeaker. That just does not look good." Leshawna said.
Suddenly Eva started angrily glaring at Heather. "So, Eva, whatcha been doing since you left the island?" Heather asked.
"Taking anger management classes. You must have wanted me to take them since you stole my MP3 player to get me voted off!" Eva said as everyone gasped.
Confessional: Heather
"Great. Suddenly due to rage-o-holic, I'm the biggest target." Heather facepalmed.
"Oh please, you would have been voted off anyway considering how angry you are all the time, seriously take a chill pill!" Heather said.
"Why you-" Eva tried to say but was interrupted.
"I mean… she's got a point." Geoff said.
"What? What did you say!" Eva angrily said.
" She was an audience favorite?" Heather whispered to the loudspeaker.
"Not really. But we liked her. Also returning to camp, it's Izzy!" Chris said from the loudspeaker.
"Oh, no!" Eva said.
"Huh?" Lindsay said, confused.
Izzy yelled like tarzan as she swung from a vine and landed on the dock. "Hey guys! It's good to be back at camp! Even though I never actually left the island. I've been living in the woods all this time!" Izzy said.
"But I thought the RCMP hunted you down." Gwen said.
"They tried. But being a wilderness survivor, I was swift-footed and avoided capture. Once I was safe among my animal brethren, it was just me against the harsh elements." Izzy replied.
"You call this harsh? It's been warm and sunny all week." Leshawna said.
"Not where I was! But luckily, I was able to take refuge in the beaver dam. Yeah, I befriended the family of beavers who lived there and together, we foraged for nuts and berries. Boy, I could use a bag of nachos right now. Haha. So, what's new with you guys?" Izzy asked and bit into a raw fish.
"Uhh… nothing?" Heather said.
"Good!" Izzy replied and bit into the fish again.
Confessional: Izzy
"Man it's good to be back, it really wasn't easy living in the woods." Izzy said.
"All right, campers! Report to the amphitheater where you'll learn all about this week's challenge! Ksh. McLean out!" Chris said from the loudspeaker and turned it off.
"Woohoo! Another challenge! Partay! Hahaha. Gimme ten!" Owen cheered as he offered a high five to Duncan.
"Uh, dude, you heard the loudspeaker. It's every camper for themselves." Duncan said and left as the cruise left as well.
"Aww… no more partay…" Owen sighed and left as well.
Cut to Eva entering the girls cabin. "What's with the tape? Somebody better answer me!" Eva asked.
"Me and Heather here got a little uh, territorial. But we're all cool now. Right, Heather?" Leshawna replied.
"Absolutely. Want my bunk, Eva?" Heather said as she pulled out the tape.
"Ew, no! I hate top bunks. I want this one. Unless this freak has a problem with that." Eva said as she pointed at Gwen's bed.
"Sur-" Gwen tried to comply but was interrupted.
"Okay, you know what? You can get all up in her face, but don't forget we're all here to win." Leshawna told Eva.
"Got that right, Sister Thunderthighs." Eva replied.
"Oh, oh, oh. Tell me that the macho mama with butt cheeks tighter than my weave did not just say that!" Leshawna replied.
"Whoa! Time out!" Gwen said, trying to end the conflict.
"Can't we just talk this out over low-cal snacks?" Lindsay asked.
"Whatever. I'm still gonna win." Eva said and left after placing her luggage.
"Hey, thanks for stepping in." Gwen thanked Leshawna.
"Oh, my pleasure. Nobody disses Shawny's thighs." Leshawna replied.
Confessional: Leshawna
"That girl is getting on my last nerve!" Leshawna said.
"Cut to a stadium where Chris was on and all the campers were sitting on chairs in the sidelines. "Welcome to your next challenge! The time-honored game of torture. Say Uncle! You are all about to be out through the tests of endurance so insane, that some of 'em sent our interns to the emergency room. If you back down from the challenge or do not last the required ten seconds, you will be eliminated. The winner will not only be safe from elimination, but will win this luxurious trailer. Yours to take home at the end of the summer." Chris explained
"Torture? Exciting!" Izzy said.
"What kinds of torture?" Leshawna asked.
"Why don't you ask my lovely assistant?" Chris said as Chef came wearing protective gear.
"Heheh." Chef giggled.
"All right. Let's do this. Duncan, you're first up. Let's spin the Wheel of Misfortune to select your torture." Chris said and Duncan came to spin the wheel. The wheel landed on a turtle image.
"Turtles? What's a turtle gonna do?" Duncan asked.
"Turtle puck shots! Our interns spent weeks collecting the grumpiest, angriest, crustiest, hungriest old snapping turtles on the island. While you stand in the goalie net completely unprotected, Chef will fire off turtle slapshots. If I were you, dude, I'd protect my coconuts. This could get ugly." Chris said as Duncan got in front of the goalie net and covered his kiwis. "If you can stay in for ten seconds, you'll go on to the second round." he finished.
"Ready, set, go!" Chef said as he started launching the turtles at Duncan. He dodged some of them but ended up being hit by one.
"Oww!" Duncan yelled in pain as he was bitten by four more turtles, one in the kiwis, and collapsed.
"And Delinquent moves on to the next round! Isn't this fun?" Chef snickered.
"Yeah, it's a riot." Duncan groaned.
"Whoa. That was harsh." Trent told Gwen in the audience chairs.
"Don't talk to me." Gwen replied.
"Are you still mad about the whole "burying you alive" thing? I thought you got over that!" Trent asked.
"Uh, yeah. I tried to not say anything about it but I'm still annoyed." Gwen replied.
"I'll never forgive myself for that one. You know, you're totally the last person here I'd leave buried in the sand if I had a choice." Trent replied.
"Really? Huh, that's kinda sweet I guess." Gwen replied.
Cut to Lindsay on the stage. "Next up, Lindsay!" Chris said as she spun the wheel and landed on a marshmallow.
"Marshmallows? Don't we get that in the end when someone gets voted out?" Lindsay asked, confused.
"Your torture is... marshmallow waxing! Chef is gonna wax your face with hot marshmallows. If you can take the pain for a full ten seconds, you can go to the next level." Chris said as he made Lindsay sit on a chair.
"Oh, I so need this. I've been dealing with nasty razor stubble for weeks. Try not to wax off my tan, 'kay?" Lindsay told Chef.
"I kinda don't care." Chef said as he dropped the hot marshmallow on Lindsay's face as she screamed in pain as everyone looked at her in cringe.
"Ah! Ow!" Lindsay said as Chef pulled the marshmallow from her face.
"Ouch. That had to hurt." Harold said.
"I don't think I would've made it through that one." Trent told Gwen.
"That's because guys are total wimps when it comes to two things: beauty and pain." Gwen replied.
"You got that right." Trent shuddered.
"Oh my gosh. I can't believe how smooth that is. Thanks, Cook." Lindsay told Chef.
"It's Chef." Chef replied as Lindsay's eyes widened.
Cut to after Lindsay got back in the audience. "Well done, Lindsay. Since you didn't even complain once, you get to choose who goes next." Chris said.
"No thanks. Ow!" Lindsay said as Eva pulled her hair toward herself to whisper in her ear. "Uh, oh, wait. I changed my mind. I choose… Heather. With lake leeches. Because she's a backstabbing lying little lowlife traitor. Grr." she said.
"Lindsay!" Heather angrily said.
"Sorry Heather, it's just that I don't want my hair to be ripped out- Whoa!" Lindsay said as Eva shoved her aside.
"It's payback time. Traitor!" Eva said as Heather gulped.
Cut to Heather on the stage. "It's payback time." Eva said again.
Confessional: Leshawna
"Eva was gunning for Heather bad since she got her out. I'd understand if she wasn't being a jerk to everyone else in the process." Leshawna said.
"Oh. And if your victim can last ten seconds without saying uncle, you get eliminated instead, which means you lose your chance to win this!" Chris said.
"Let's get this over with." Heather said as she got in the pool of leeches.
"Sorry again!" Lindsay yelled.
Heather grunted in pain as she sat in the pool and jumped out while yelling. "Ooh... Close shave, Geoff. Nine and nine one hundred-thousandths of a millionth... Whatever. It's not ten. You're out. You can return to your new seat. Owen, you're next." Chris said as Heather got back on her seat ,which turned into a pillory, while glaring at Lindsay.
Cut to Owen on the stadium wearing wooden shorts. "Wooden shorts? Big deal." Owen chuckled.
"We'll see about that." Chef said and brought a woodpecker.
"Ah!" Owen yelled and covered his kiwis.
Cut to Gwen on a chair on the stadium. "Stand still, kid." Chef said and pulled out her nosehairs.
"Ah!" Gwen yelled in pain.
Cut to DJ on the stadium being strangled by a snake. "Uncle!" DJ yelled, being the second one out.
Cut to Geoff on the stadium wearing a coat of bees. "This isn't so bad." Geoff said as Chris spun the wheel.
"Our next challenge will be... spending ten seconds in a wooden crate with Sasquatchanakwa. Tough one. Geoff, you haven't complained in a while, so you can choose the next victim." Chris told Geoff.
"Eva. Eva. Eva. Eva." Everyone silently cheered.
Confessional: Geoff
"I didn't want to piss off Eva like I did before but everyone wanted me to do it! I couldn't resist!" Geoff said.
Confessional: Leshawna
"Eva's hardcore. I was thinking that she could actually pull this off." Leshawna said.
Confessional: Gwen
"If he picked Eva and she made it out alive, Eva was gonna be so ticked off." Gwen said.
"Eva. Eva. Eva. Eva." Everyone continued cheering.
"Sure, whatever." Geoff gulped as he looked at Eva.
"Here's a toe tag, surfer boy. You'll be needing it for later." Eva threatened.
Cut to Eva on the stage in front of a crate. She entered it and fought something in it off-screen. She got out of the crate wearing a hat, gloves, and boots made out of Sasquatchanakwa while smirking.
"Eva stuck it out, so Geoff is out of the game! Reckless choice by Bridgette. Still, let's give her props for sticking it to a teammate. Now let's see who showed less courage than Eva and cried uncle." Chris said as Geoff's seat transformed as well.
Cut to Trent jumping on rocks with skunks below them. "Ew! Love the skunk jump!" Chris said as Trent was sprayed by a skunk and collapsed.
Cut to Gwen wearing headphones while cringing. "And the new-age music torture." Chris said as Gwen took the headphones off.
Cut to Chef about to cut Lindsay's hair with a chainsaw. "And a little visit to the Wawanakwa Hair Salon." Chris said as Lindsay ran away.
Cut to Harold looking at a shoe made of goo. "And the mystery goo." Chris said as Harold tried to put his feet into the shoe but it ran away before he could.
Cut to Chef angrily looking at Duncan on the stage. "And the berating from Chef!" Chris said as Chef started scolding Duncan. "Your life is nothing. You serve zero purpose. You should kill yourself now. And give somebody else a piece of that oxygen, in the ozone layer, that's covered up so that we can breathe inside this blue trapped bubble. Because what are you here for? To worship me? Kill yourself! I mean that with a hundred percent with a thousand percent." Chef said as Duncan collapsed in shock.
Cut to Owen eating ice cream. "Oh, and who could forget the old ice cream brain freeze?" Chris said as Owen finished. "Woohoo!" Owen cheered but then immediately started screaming and holding his head.
Cut to after everyone but Leshawna, Izzy and Eva were eliminated. Izzy was on a chair and Chef zapped her with electric eels. "Clear!" Chef said as he finished the zapping.
"That was great! Hit me again!" Izzy laughed.
"Uh, sure?" Chef said as he zapped her again as she laughed crazily.
"Izzy, who's your next victim?" Chris asked.
"Ooh, ooh, me! With a poison ivy spa treatment!" Izzy said.
Confessional: Leshawna
"Is it just me, or is that girl some kind of crazy?" Leshawna said.
"It's Chris. Yeah, yeah. She wants to do it. Okay." Chris said to someone on the phone. "Okay. The judges will allow it, but they wanna know why." he asked.
"I just wanna see how it feels." Izzy shrugged.
"All righty then." Chris said.
Cut to after Chef put the poison ivy on Izzy. "Time's up. Chef, remove the poison ivy." Chris said.
"No, no. It feels great." Izzy said.
"Seriously?" Chef facepalmed.
"You stuck it out, but sadly, you eliminated yourself due to taking too long to end this." Chris said.
"Look how big my lips are!" Izzy mumbled as she pointed at her swollen face as Chef removed the poison ivy.
Confessional: Izzy
"That stuff was so soothing, they should do that instead of massages or something." Izzy said, lips still swollen.
"Eva, you're up. All right. After twenty rounds of torture, we're down to two steely competitors and the sudden death round. Will you make Leshawna do a challenge or do it yourself?" Chris said.
"Let's see what Thunderthighs can do, wouldn't wanna make her lose by just watching." Eva said.
Confessional: Leshawna
"I did not make it this far to quit now. That trailer is bank, and it's got my name written all over it. Whatever he's got to throw at me, I'm gonna do." Leshawna said.
"Leshawna, it's up to you. Your final challenge is... The Grizzly Bear Log Roll." Chris said as Chef spun the wheel and it landed on a grizzly bear.
"The grizzly bear say what?" Leshawna asked.
Cut to a bear in front of the dock on a log. "Molotov the Bear performs with the Russian national circus and has been the European log-rolling champion for the past twelve years. To win, you must last ten seconds on the log while avoiding certain death in the piranha-infested water." Chef explained.
"Leshawna, you could back out now." Chris said.
"No way! I've seen scarier looking faces at the mall. I'm going in!" Leshawna said.
Cut to Leshawna on the log with the bear. "And... go!" Chef said as the bear started rolling the log.
"Ooh... Whoa. Whoa! Ooh." Leshawna said as she almost fell but was able to pick herself up. The bear smirked at her. She replied by glaring and ran even faster and stomped on the log, making the bear stop and sending him into the piranha filled water as they all bit off his fur. "Ha! And that's how I roll!" she cheered.
"Leshawna wins! So Eva is out!" Chris said.
"What?! No way!" Eva angrily said.
"Way. She wins the challenge, invincibility, and the grand prize!" Chris replied.
"Whoo! Yes, baby! Whoo! You lose, I win! You lose, I win! That's right, baby! Yeah!" Leshawna cheered as she went toward the trailer and hugged it.
"While Leshawna checks out her trailer full of food and we check out her blood pressure, the rest of you can go to the confessional booth and vote off a camper. Other than Leshawna." Chris told everyone else who all looked upset.
Cut to the campfire ceremony. "Okay. So first up, we ran out of marshmallows." Chris began the ceremony.
"No! Life, why must you torture me so?" Owen whined.
"First, grumpy girl. Not only were you the first one out in the challenge, you also got exposed as a sneaky bastard!" Chef called out Heather who looked annoyed.
Confessional: Heather
"Why does he need to remind us every single time? Just get on with the damn ceremony already!" Heather said.
"Crazy girl, you made the final 3 in the challenge and were doing extremely well, and yet instead of trying to win you decided to eliminate yourself for a poison ivy spa treatment!" Chef called out Izzy who's expression didn't change.
Confessional: Izzy
"That poison ivy treatment was so worth it though." Izzy said.
"Finally, Rage-o-holic, you pissed off everyone in a single day and failed to win immunity despite being in the final 2, putting a giant target on your back!" Chef called out Eva who still looked angry.
"I've reviewed the confessionals and I have to say, there's lots of hate on in this group, which is awesome! While I normally protect your privacy, in the spirit of airing your dirty laundry, I'm gonna go live with your confessionals!" Chris said.
VOTES:
Confessional: Heather
"Since Leshawna's immune, there's no other choice but rage-o-holic Eva." Heather said as she drew demon horns on a picture of Eva.
Confessional: Duncan
"I vote for Heather because after what Eva said I know she's behind Courtney getting kicked off. You'll pay for that, toots! If you're watching this on cable, I miss you babe." Duncan said as he showed a picture of Heather with a skull on it.
Confessional: Gwen
"Eva's a freak. So, see ya." Gwen said as she angrily scribbled on a picture of Eva.
Confessional: Leshawna
"Eva needs to chill the heck down." Leshawna said as she showed a crossed out picture of Eva.
Confessional: DJ
"Eva's nuts. Sorry again." DJ said as he showed a crossed out picture of Eva.
Confessional: Geoff
"It's gotta be Eva. Unless I can figure out who snagged my lucky hat." Geoff said as he crossed out a picture of Eva.
Confessional: Lindsay
"I just can't get over how smooth this is. Anyway, I vote off Ava 'cause she's scarier than Heather, Laquisha, and Greta combined." Lindsay said as she drew on a picture of Eva.
Confessional: Trent
"Eva I guess, no reason not to." Trent said as he drew on a picture of Eva.
Confessional: Harold
"I vote Eva, I'm just gla-" Harold said as he drew on a picture of Eva but the video was suddenly cut.
Confessional: Izzy
"Eva's pretty fun! Anyways I vote for Leshawna, cause wouldn't it be so funny to vote for an immune person?" Izzy said as she scribbled on a picture of Leshawna.
Confessional: Owen
"Eva's kinda scary." Owen said as he drew a pizza on a picture of Eva.
Confessional: Eva
"Unless they wanna leave in body bags, they better not say my name. I vote for Heather." Eva threatened as she showed a picture that couldn't be seen due to how many angry scribbles were on it.
"Lots of dirt revealed there, huh? But in the end, it was still nine votes against Eva. So, adios." Chris said.
"What?! This isn't the end of me! You better watch your backs! I'm not done! I'll get my revenge!" Eva yelled.
Cut to Eva on the Boat of Losers wearing a straightjacket.
"I'm not done with you! Oh! And Izzy lied! She wasn't in the woods! She was–" Eva yelled as the boat went out of sight.
"Wow. She has issues, huh? Party at Leshawna's new crib!" Izzy said as everyone cheered and went to the trailer.
Cut to Sasquatchanakwa in the cave wearing the hat, gloves and boots Eva was wearing as well as a barrel as it looked at itself with a mirror while a bear wore Katie and Sadie's clothes and squealed "Eee!" to imitate them as the episode ended.
Merge: DJ,Duncan,Geoff,Gwen,Harold,Heather,Izzy,Leshawna,Lindsay,Owen,Trent
Eliminated Campers:
12. Eva
MERGE
13. Bridgette
14. Courtney
15. Tyler
16. Noah
17. Cody
x. Izzy
18. Sadie
19. Katie
20. Beth
21. Justin
x. Eva
22. Ezekiel
Eva and Izzy are back like in cannon. Not a fan of how Eva's elimination was handled in this episode but I improved it by making her anger be directed at Heather and serve some relevance by exposing Heather so im fine with her here.