Chapter Forty-Six:
Pandemonium
Jack woke up to a phantom sense of agony. Although the fire no longer burned, he could still so viscerally remember the feeling of the flames consuming him, feeding off his flesh, turning his skin to wax… It was through the ceasing of his searing pain that it dawned on him: Toothless had set Bloodvist on fire, a life for a life, the key to that underworld…
Which meant Bloodvist was now dead.
The ceiling had given way, burying his most feared foe into earth and stone — he knew that his body would never be found.
"What have you done?" Gothel's voice shrieked not far from where he lay, and her piercing voice was what struck him alert.
As soon as opened his eyes, orange and red bathed his sight. Maybe the sky was on fire — maybe there was no sky and their trip through the dais had worked and they were sent straight to the realms of hell; he could not tell. Dark, blood-red clouds paced ragingly on that infernal atmosphere. Most curiously, he realised he did not feel heat, in fact his fingers felt like he had just submerged them in ice. His mouth breathed out foggy gasps as he struggled to his feet.
"Hiccup?" He examined his surroundings.
The group was not far — all trying to stand, still beyond dizzy and bonkers by the sudden trip. The stone archway stood proudly above them, immaculate even through the bizarre landscape of that place. However, there was no veil anymore.
Merida's fiery ginger hair nearly blended in with the sky, the curls waving in the windy air like flames. The girl looked around herself, turning her head sideways until she finally spotted Gothel. The girl's blue eyes narrowed into slits:
"Don't yer dare move a muscle!" She had her wand trained on the Obscurial witch. Gothel, with similar, yet pitch black curls, had a venomous stare of betrayal; her eyes turned to Granger like a snake staring at its prey:
"Whatever you've done to Bloodvist…"
"A life for a life, that's what Haddock said." Hermione Granger had her wand aimed at her opponent's head; her chin up, fearlessly staring her down like her equal: "I've known that place; I've been to the Department of Mysteries ages ago… Someone has to die in order to cross through the veil; it's a monstrous act that pierces through the fabric of the living world. It was the only way to get us here."
"I had you in my aim the entire time, how—"
"You got distracted." Granger stepped closer towards Gothel. "You were so focused on Hiccup that you missed Jack's legilimens charm."
Gothel was beyond enraged. "You've got the girl out."
Granger gave a small nod, still staring the witch down. "I had a good guess; we're here now."
"Here's the deal, yer nutcase," Merida's voice had never sounded stronger than now, as she rounded the witch with a calculating semblant. "We can take care of one Obscurial. There are five of us, and a dragon. Should you do anything, we'll have ye killed then and there. Have 'Ah made myself clear?"
Surrounded by more wands than even an experienced dueller would coward against, Gothel had no other option but to oblige. "You'll need my Dark Magic if you plan to return to the upper world."
"The only reason we haven't killed yer sorry ass. If…" Merida rethought her next words, "No, when you step out of line, we will not hesitate."
Angus, the centaur, stood taller than all the others. Looking at the bare landscape around himself, the creature gave one sight of fright. "These stars are cursed… no man nor centaur should be walking these streets…"
They stood on a rocky, uneven ground. Scattered throughout the ground, several long sticks — or were those branches? He could not tell. Beyond the red and orange glow, he could see wrecks of old structures in the distance, now hazed and faded under that foggy scenario. Jack's eyes wandered from the harsh features on Angus's face to Granger's inquisitive expression, still looking for Hiccup, now more desperately than before…
A bat-like shape shadowed them from the burning sky. Although its sight caused fright on most of the others, Jack stared at it in wonder:
"Toothless?" He muttered to himself.
It was a majestic sight, Toothless's wings seemed to grow as he neared, pitch black into that endless fire. The dragon landed heavily next to them, Hiccup proudly mounted on the dragon's back, so magnificently that Jack felt a sudden sense of inferiority. When he jumped off Toothless, Jack bathed in the feeling of relief that took over his stomach, his heart beating a little easier until he noticed Hiccup's troubled expression, his face scrunched up in annoyance.
"This is not the place I was sent to," he began, pacing back and forth between them. "This is not Helheim, this is…"
"Muspelheim." Said Gothel with an elongated tone. Hiccup stopped dead in his tracks, eyeing the witch for more answers. "This portal did not lead us to Helheim, or Sheol. Look around you, what can you see?"
Confused, the boys eyed their surroundings again, trying to figure out within that red ocean what Gothel wanted them to see — until Jack's eyes focused on the sticks sprawled all around the grounds, the little holes carved into the ends of each… and then he understood.
"Serpents," Said Hiccup, puzzled. "Like the Naga."
"Quite likely." Replied Gothel.
"This is Pandemonium." Hiccup now had his eyes wide open while Gothel gave him a curious smirk.
"Where the demons were turned into snakes, much like Boghavati was inhabited by snake-people, or the Midgard Serpent. Either way, myths always grasp some portion of the truth… these sorry folks have been dead for far too long now."
"If we're in Pandemonium," Hermione had already put her brilliant mind to recall every last mythological history book she had ever read. "Then all we need to look for is a bridge…" the girl's face lit up in desperate understanding. "The myths say that the devil himself could escape Hell through a portal."
Everyone stared at each other in silence, waiting for a plan, anything that promised they would leave that wasteland…
"Find the palace for the king of darkness, find your bridge. By all means, you'll need to sacrifice me again if you intend to leave this place." As Gothel elongated her bargain, Jack began to feel that familiar weight of the incoming trap that came with every compromise. The group threw glances at each other, knowing too well what their options were – Gothel's navigation could lead them forward, but they'd be foolish to forget she acted according to her own agenda.
With a decisive nod, Merida took a step towards the witch, aiming at Gothel with her wand. "Lead the way."
They all turned to the scarlet horizon, putting on their bravest façades as Merida climbed Angus's back, Hermione collected Gothel's wand, and Hiccup and Jack found their way up Toothless hump before beginning their steady march towards the tallest of the structures they saw in the distance. Every last one of them knew they thought the same, they all shared the hope that they would find their way out of that goddamned place. It was the most desolating feeling, such a strange and hollow taste of existential terror…
Yet, Jack cursed himself for finding such excitement in riding with Hiccup on Toothless's back under those circumstances, so far away into the unknown, exploring what could well be the World's End. Yet he couldn't help but bask in that feeling that was having the brunette's body so close to his, his hand resting on the side of Hiccup's torso. It was rather pathetic, he then figured, choosing to focus on the rocky path.
They finally approached what could have been an old stone palace centuries past. This gigantic structure had massive columns that seemed to shoot up from the earth into the sky, this strange yet sophisticated architecture proudly standing, now ruined by the unmeasurable time left behind…
"Abandon all hope…" Hiccup muttered gloomy, his green eyes fixated on the ginormous structure.
"Don't be afraid." Jack muttered against his ears, giving the boy one reassuring squeeze on his sides. For a moment, he feared he had gone too far in his touch, and even when Hiccup seemingly took no notice of that gesture, he decided not to push his luck much further.
The entrance to the palace was one descending slope of earth into an underground tunnel. The idea of entering that place was as terrifying as the thought of staying where they were, under that red, lifeless sky. Hiccup turned to the rest of the group.
"I'll go first with Jack. Mer, Angus, you take the rear: in case anything follows us, you let us know." Then his gaze turned to Gothel. "You'll go in the middle. Try anything and we'll have you dead before you know it."
"Oh, darling, we may not live to reach the other side of this trip, I'd like to hear something more amiable than that." Said Gothel.
"And I'd like to hear the gift of your silence." Hermione poked hard on Gothel with the end of her wand, pushing the witch to the entrance.
The path down the destroyed palace was flanked by tall columns shooting up to high stone ceilings, cracked and burnt and weathered by years of hellish abandon. They were on a dark stone path, moving forwards with equal amounts of hope and fear in their sweating skin, their gritting teeth and their wide eyes. There was this ominous, horrible looming sensation of everlasting loneliness that no one would ever forget…
The group advanced slowly through the dark corridor, eyes wide and alert. Merida and Angus both had their bows and arrows ready. Granger walked behind the Obscurial witch, her wand locked on her skull the entire time.
In front, Jack and Hiccup remained mounted on Toothless, both boys too close for comfort, yet none made any effort to separate their bodies: Hiccup's back pressing against Jack's chest, the inside of Jack's thighs burning sweetly as they braced Hiccup's hips. Both boys let their minds play one hundred possible scenarios where their conversations would release all they had to say, their hearts beating violently in their chests…
The darkness suddenly gave a thump and a flicker: everyone jumped in fright as a line of torches lit in succession, snapping and bursting into a lonely shade of blue — they had reached a huge antichamber with exactly six arched entryways, all showing one dark cavernous path behind them…
"Which one do we choose?" Asked Granger, her eyes studying the many doors in desperate search of a hint. Gothel's lips pulled in her signature smirk:
"I'd say Hell wants us to separate."
"Not a chance." Said Granger, her wand again trained at the Obscurial, yet Gothel seemed less than concerned by her words, more thrilled by the test, to dare and cheat the devil himself. "We're not splitting."
"Let's see just how long your plans will serve you." Gothel concluded, her green eyes evaluating the nearest door before raising her chin to the one in the very middle.
As the group restarted its march, slowly penetrating the entryways of those forsaken corridors, another unsettling feeling took hold of their guts — that terrifying loneliness that carried existential dread... Hiccup was the first to cross the pathway atop of Toothless, slowly entering the dark, abandoned corridor.
"Steady bud, we won't be able to see much here… Lumus!" Said Hiccup, turning his head, ready to see Jack behind him…
His eyes found nothing but the stone wall, the entryway through which he had just passed now inexistent.
The moment Hiccup's body slipped in the portal, something that felt like a giant fist wooshed Jack off Toothless hump, throwing the boy backwards until he landed heavily on the floor. One second later, the entryway had disappeared from their view.
"HICCUP!" Jack screamed, the flickering light of the torches further fueling his terror as he punched the stone with his bare fists…
Merida tried approaching him, tears glimmering in her eyes. "Stop it, Jack, we can't reach him–"
"HICCUP!" The boy half sobbed, his irises glowing red as the Obscurial within threatened to escape.
"Please!" The girl cried out, but for once, it was Gothel's voice who managed to pierce through the beast to make Jack listen:
"You understand now. There's no way around the will of Fate." She spoke softly, and it was the final trigger as they stared each other down, before Jack flung into the Obscurial, exploding into the black matter towards her with savage fury — Gothel's monster, however, was much quicker, evaporating swiftly to the side, taking the quick second of that distraction to dodge Hermione's and Merida's aim, slipping through the nearest archdoor only a few metres away… the stones shook and turned, closing in a second until there was only solid wall where there once was an entryway.
Jack's body resurfaced then, the obscure smoke dissipating in wisps around him with an echoing ring that seemed to last for several minutes. Then came a moment of absolute silence: Merida, Angus and Granger had their eyes locked on Jack's sulking form sitting on the ground.
Hiccup's on the other side, he thought, the image of the boy waiting for him on the other side of those walls driving him to stand again, a new urgent sense of purpose that had his heart racing. These places are meant to test your heart, he acknowledged, taking one deep breath before staring at the very next door, his icy blue eyes examining it thoroughly.
"I'll see you on the other side." He said, not eyeing back before he disappeared behind the next passageway.
"Where are you—?" Merida's inquiry was interrupted by Jack's door closing in on itself.
"We need to reach the bridge before Gothel." Said Granger finally, taking uncertain — although determined steps toward the next door. "Whatever happens in there, don't lose yourselves." She gave a final warning to the girl and the centaur. They exchanged one final nod of encouragement, before together, leaping into their entrances.
"Jack?!" Hiccup called out loud, mounted atop Toothless's back, completely alone. "Damnit!"
An echoing rumble took place. The corners between the walls and the ceiling snapped alive, and very slowly, Hiccup noticed, the ceiling began to shrink. His eyes frantically roamed his surroundings, the corridor shrinking in on itself so slowly, but the stone ceiling had nearly reached his head. Toothless crouched, giving him a few extra inches of space — which were soon consumed by the lowering ceiling.
Screaming, Hiccup jumped off the dragon's back, the dragon giving off one draconian squeak of terror as the ceiling lowered enough to force his head down. "Toothless, stop fighting!" He jumped over to the dragon, holding on to the creature for dear life, his very best hope of ever surviving, the ceiling now lowering far enough to force both him and Toothless to crouch.
"Toothless, stop!" He pleaded, tears escaping his eyes as the dragon kept thrashing under the ceiling, which now began pressing him further into the floor. Hiccup's mind raced, the boy barely in control of his decisions as he struggled for his wand, the space to move his arm increasingly smaller — he only had enough time to aim his wand at the dragon as both he and Toothless began to be squashed into one another: "OCULTATUM!" He roared, closing his eyes…
Two things happened at once: the weight of Toothless disappeared completely, and he opened his eyes to see that the ceiling had returned to its original size.
He quickly got back to his feet, holding the small, terrified dragon gingerly in one hand, the other gripping the wand, illuminating the hollow stone corridors. He gave one resigned sigh. "I guess I ought to do this alone, bud…"
Jack wandered through his own maze with his heart pumping blood, fear and fire… Wand in hands he ran these dark corridors desperately, the blinding light of his wand doing little to light the fear that shook his bones… Every corner he turned at seemed to lead him nowhere but further away from the other side…
"These places are meant to test your heart…" He muttered to himself again, his voice so low, yet it was the only sound in that abandoned place, his only source of any solace… He marched on, his patience wearing off as he chose between pathways, trying to keep in his mind the one that would lead him further down the end of that torment… How had Hiccup made it out? He thought, soon enough remembering that Hiccup had gone with Astrid and Toothless, while he was miserably and desperately alone…
As if sang by the wind, one sweet melodic laughter reached his ears. It was feminine and childish, and its joyous tone pierced Jack's chest like a burning dagger. His blue eyes widened in a mixture of hope and horror:
"Flee?" His voice echoed through the dark corridors in a ghostly cry.
The soft, innocent laughter happened again, and his heart gave a heavy, tight pump. He could never forget the voice of the one thing he loved more than life itself…
Through the harsh light from his wand, he saw the ghost of the reflection of her hair, flowing after young Flee as she ran, almost as if in slow motion, through death itself…
The laughter rang again, and suddenly, it was not fear, but desperation that fuelled his steps, and he dashed into a frenetic run through the endless twists and turns of that bloody maze, chasing for his little sister…
"Jack!"
That voice, so loving, struck his memory with a painful blow — a memory he could never dream to forget… How could he forget his sister's voice, the one that would always wield half of his heart, sounding like a lullaby written by the most treacherous angel and sung by the most virtuous demon… He chased the voice with the most agonising desperation, the shadow of his sister ever so unreachable, like trying to grab smoke with his bare hands…
Hiccup had put Toothless over his shoulder, which the creature clinged to for dear life… if it weren't for the light coming from Hiccup's wand, the only visible thing keeping the hollow feeling in his soul at bay… His mind was desperately analysing that place, tracing back all he knew to this point: it was a test, he knew it had to be. Hellheim had them give life in exchange for freedom. This place felt more like he had walked into a trap; like falling straight into the lion's den. Hell was a place for judgement, he thought, still running, trying to memorise every last turn he took…
The floor around his feet suddenly wavered, the stones cracking and bustling like effervescent bubbles. Hiccup gave a sharp scream as the stones gained a different and terrifying shape: gruesome wax-looking faces formed in the rocks — his heart sank to his stomach, his eyes widened in terror:
"Kill us, please…" cried one through a tremendously pained voice.
"Show us mercy at last…" Whimpered another one.
The smell hit him like a punch to the face — burnt, melted flesh, the stench no human was supposed to experience in their lifetimes…
"I'm sorry…" Said Hiccup, his voice cracking as he tried to walk away from that tormentous floor, however his boot stepped on a disgusting looking head.
"You've killed us, boy…" Said the face. "You've ended us all…"
Hiccup's eyes glowed with tears; he gave out small screams of terror as he stepped on even more faces rising from the floor. "Murderer!" They began chanting, the light from his wand so sharp it gave the faces a disgustingly monstrous feel… He'd never felt that scared in his life, looking away from the burnt faces carved in the stones… "Murderer!"
"I'm sorry!" His sharp mind had now gone dull, too overcome with fear to make sense of his surroundings, trying to escape aimlessly and failing to remember what was it that kept him going… Astrid, he tried thinking, you're here for Astrid! But her face seemed so distant, escaping his memory as if it were years instead of days since he had last seen her…
"You bring death, boy…" A face said right next to his, so close that he could smell its breath of ashes, or count every last scar burnt to the skin… yet Hiccup could not look away.
"I had to…" He replied, so entranced by that horrible face, his mind slipping between where he was and where he'd been, unsure whether he lay in the cavernous floors of hell or in the scorched forbidden forest amidst his fallen foes…
"You had to." Mimicked the face, the stone mouth in front of him so terrifyingly real… "Don't look away, boy! Look me in the eye! Tell me what haunts you, Dragon Rider, our death or our pain? Do our voices haunt you still?"
Hiccup's eyes were locked on the stone head, the ugliest, most gruesome thing he had ever seen, yet he could not dare looking away, deep into those hollow eyes he'd killed…
"Every night." He cried weakly. "I remember everything…"
The face melted further, the stone skin blistering and giving way to the bones beneath, the skull flashing in full view as its jaw widened and gave a penetrating shriek, howling like a wolf tearing its own flesh off the bones... Hiccup's heart raced in his chest, beating so ferociously, like a wild crow clankering its wings to break free — Hiccup tapped his ears, crushing his own skull to muffle the sound…
There was a loud crack, echoing inside his mind, and it was like the edges of his vision were ripped apart and something incandescently hot blazed into his chest.
The noise echoed and ceased, and the pressure in his chest disappeared.
It was so silent at last, and giving what felt like the first gasp of air in his life, he stood up painfully… His heart ached to beat, but that very pain reminded him he was still breathing: it hurt to live — it was agony, he concluded, but it was so real… He could barely remember or care the reason why he'd agreed to endure such hellish torment before he heard the distant footsteps echoing from deeper in the maze:
"...Flee!" He caught that familiar voice, so desperately…
Jack! His heart gave another heavy beat, this one however filled with a different taste of desperation — a purpose filled thirst, something to run to instead of from…
Hiccup began moving again, his feet absolutely unsure of their next steps, however taking each one increasingly more confidently than the last… the hole in his chest was the pain he noticed the most…
The corridors looked increasingly more equal, to the point he had lost complete notion of how had he even made it to that point, but nothing mattered other than finding Jack, his ears completely in tune to the other's cries — those piercing, heartbreaking cries as he called out, again and again; "Flee! Flee!"
There was one very rational part of him that called for his self-preservation, that said that chasing Jack would mean completely losing himself and where he had come from… perhaps two nights prior, he'd have gladly listened to that thought. However, his aching feet ran faster towards Jack, for it felt impossible to abandon him; he suddenly felt like he was all that was worth chasing, when Jack's pained screams began hurting on Hiccup's heart…
With the dim light of his wand, he almost didn't see Jack running across the next corridor, the black hair so blended in the . "Jack!" Hiccup shouted, sprinting faster after him. Jack had been running aimlessly, his robes floating behind his steps, his hands tatting the walls at every turn to keep himself standing. "Jack!" Hiccup called out again, but he did not hear, too frantic, too absorbed in what he was chasing… Hiccup made his legs work faster, so impossibly faster, finally reaching to catch the other boy by his shoulders: they collided with a painful crash, collapsing to the ground.
"Let me go, I need to find her!" Jack cried, thrashing around to get back on his feet, but Hiccup only held him in place.
"Jack, what are you—"
"Flee! Come back!" Jack screamed over him, his mind still entranced by whatever it was he was seeing, or hearing. It took Hiccup a moment to remember the person behind the name, the story behind such a painful quest, and when it did, things snapped into place in Hiccup's mind.
Hiccup's hands found their way to Jack's, unsure whether he even was the real Jack, or another twisted game to play with his mind, but as hard as it was to hold Jack into place, it was more painful to ignore the gaping hole in his chest… this was his Jack, in agony for the one thing he had lost that could never, ever be replaced. This would be more painful than anything he'd ever done to Jack, breaking McNair's hand, casting any hex or jinx he could on his way, those things were nothing; this was the ultimate test.
"Jack, please, listen to me…" Hiccup started, taking a stronger hold on the boy's wrist.
"I need to find her, Hiccup, I need to…" Jack's cries pierced Hiccup's heart, yet he didn't let go, the blue eyes focused on something beyond that Hiccup could not dream to see;
"She's not here, Jack…"
"She's is, look, she's right there!" He cried like a child, so heartbreakingly; his cracking voice made Hiccup stronger, however, trying to keep his sanity when Jack was falling apart... What was it that Azel had told him, why didn't it seem so impossible now to be so kind? But Jack was still thrashing wildly to break free, trying to reach the ghost of Flee…
"You need to let go, please!" His arms had now found their way around Jack's torso, holding him more strongly, cradling him against his own chest. He could not see her like Jack could, but he could imagine her: he'd heard Jack talking endlessly about Flee times and times before, her long brown locks, their identical smiles, full of mischief and wonder, and above all, her eyes, wide and brown, the same shape as his, so beautiful… "You've got to come with me… she's not real, Jack…" He pleaded again, and he'd noticed Jack had stopped fighting his grasp, instead placing his hand on Hiccup's arms, still snaking around his middle.
"She is real…" Jack cried, and it took all Hiccup had not to give away and let Jack chase the ghost of his sister...
"Her love for you is real, Jack… this I know…" He whispered, for his voice threatened to abandon him any time. "But you're real and you're alive — you're here with me... If I let you go, I might never find you again." Hiccup surprised himself with the veracity of his words, he found that he never wanted to lose the grip on Jack's body. "You need to let her go."
He imagined Flee's smile fading into the depths of the cave, deciding to hold on tighter on Jack before he tugged him again, pulling the boy who now barely resisted his arms, and then turning the other way, stepping into the last corner before they caught the first glimpse of light — together, they exited the maze, the final corridor bathing them in so much light it was blinding, the ghost of Flee's last laughter haunting their every step.
I'm surprised there actually are people reading this; if you're here then just... thank you :)
Life's got harder, but better.
There's such freedom that comes when you're out there on your own... I feel like one of my characters, roaming around the desolated world of grown-ups, after cans of soup and fending for my own... but honestly, the view is just spectacular.
I actually made my way to London a few months back - yes, I saw the Harry Potter thingy in King's Cross station, but above that, I went to Covent Garden (the first few chapters of 'ascendant' took place there). What a weird feeling, I wrote of a place I'd never stepped foot on, but it was just like in my imagination, a hundred times better... the streets, the stores, Liberty (my Cruella moment, so chic *). Millenium bridge is absolutely beautiful, and yes, I may have seen some death eaters trying to tear the bridge down.
I'm so in love with life it's intoxicating. I'm self made, no one's paying for my little trips, I'm running around just hopping on weird jobs and making money however I can... I'm smart, tho, so far I've spent nearly a year of this just fine.
Although from all places I've seen, Austria, Scotland, England, France... I've got to say Ireland has stolen a huge piece of my heart... Next on my list is Italy, I'm coming for you.
I have said here before, I struggle with the concept of meaninglessness in our world... in my life, mostly... I'm working on that still, but I think I've got a breakthrough last month; while musing on how nothing seems to follow any particular order or possess any inherent value, until I realised how strangely connected some things are... I remembered Chaos theory, more specifically, the Butterfly effect, y'all know, how a butterfly beating its wings could stir up a massive storm halfway across the world;
I made one friend here, this person who has absolutely *NOTHING* to do with me nor my story, yet I tell you, and I do not exaggerate, we have lived the exact same lives from halfway across the world. I met this person, and it was like wathing in a mirror, everything I've done in my life being reflected in their story, their lovers, their family, their siblings, their traumas, their profession and their hobbies... me, an absolute anarchist, while they, complete communists... it made me think that perhaps I was meant to find this person and love them, as friends I really, really love them... we're meeting in Amsterdam soon enough, Imma pack my greens and I plan on greening out, know what I mean (4:20 xx) but Gosh... I'm so glad I met them. Things sort of fell into place when I realised that perhaps, some things do have a bigger force than any of us could foresee... As my lady Charlotte Gothel would call it, Fate. And Jack, a teaspoon or a dragon.
Life is so worth it... One thing we normalise growing up is how miserable everyone actually is... I wish y'all could see the world under this new light... freedom, man, absolute freedom... god, what a world...