A/N: Hello people! Sorry for the long wait. I promise the next update will be in a few days. Enjoy ;)
Santana didn't stop to think. She took off as fast as she could, not caring that she was bumping into people as she ran after Sophia. Her heart was in her throat, beating to fast and so hard she wouldn't be surprised if she had a heart attack. Brittany was calling after her, asking where she was going, what was wrong, but Santana couldn't answer. She needed to find Sophia.
She ran passed the stall Sophia had been at, where Aubrey, Kris and Grace were still standing, giggling. She didn't stop to talk to them. She couldn't stop. There was a horrible fear rising in her. A horrible fear that the skinny blonde man who'd chased Sophia was the same skinny blonde man she'd met in a bakery. The same drug addicted, recently incarcerated, skinny man who had just shot and killed a cleaning lady.
Santana ran faster, desperate now to get to Sophia.
"Mami?"
Santana skidded to a stop, turning to see Sophia come out of a tent she'd just run past, with Jessie right beside her.
"Sophia." She breathed, rushing forward and pulling her into a hug. Tears fell involuntarily from her eyes. She squeezed Sophia harder as the adrenaline left her body and her hands began to shake. "Oh my god Sophia."
"Mum…" Sophia said, sounding like she was straining.
"Santana?" Jessie asked, frowning. "Is everything okay?"
"Where's the man what was chasing her?" She asked, wiping her tears harshly. "Did you get him?"
"He was a kid." Jessie said. "Teenager. Thought he was being funny."
"He had a mask." Sophia said, pulling away from Santana. "And he jumped out to scare me."
"A teenager?" Santana asked, her brain struggling to make sense of what they were saying.
"Yeah." Jessie looked around. He found the boy quickly. "There." He pointed.
Santana followed his direction, finding the lanky, blonde boy standing with another boy who was wearing a bloody white sheet, laughing.
"A teenager." She repeated.
"Yeah. He scared me." Sophia said, cuddling into Santana's side. "Twice. He has this spider that he kept trying to put on my shoulder. That's why I ran."
Santana exhaled heavily, feeling light headed as the last of her panic left her.
"Sometimes I really hate boys." Sophia was mumbling. All Santana could do was hug her closer.
Brittany came walking up to them, her eyes wide and confused, with a frustrated pack of boys, and Kaycee trailing behind her. Behind them were Sophia's friends. They laughed louder when they saw her.
"Santana." Brittany called, walking faster. "What happened? Why did you run like that?"
Santana shook her head, holding Brittany's eye contact to communicate that she in no way wanted to talk about it now. Brittany frowned.
"Sophia," Aubrey said, giggling, "you shouldn't have run like that. He only chased you cause you ran."
"I thought it was a real spider." Sophia said, pulling away from Santana.
"Me too." Grace said. "I would have run but I was too terrified to move."
Aubrey rolled her eyes, walking right up to Sophia. "She's only saying that so you won't be mad at her for laughing at you. Back there she said she'd never run from something like a spider."
"I might let her think I'm mad for a while." Sophia said, smirking slightly. "See how far she'll go to get me to forgive her."
Aubrey giggled. Santana narrowed her eyes, cocking her head. That laugh sounded a little too much like the sniggers she and Quinn used to make freshman year, watching someone be slushied.
"Who chased you with a spider?" Kyler ask, frowning.
"That boy." Sophia said, pointing to the two boys.
"How do you think he would like it?" Jesús asked, drifting to Kyler's side, both of them staring at the teenagers.
"I don't think they'd like it all." Kyler said. "I bet he's scared of snakes. I saw one that looks so real in one of the stalls."
"We could use masks too, see if he runs off screaming."
"Yeah." Kyler grinned.
They both turned to Brittany.
"Mama can we have some money please?" Kyler asked.
"I shouldn't let you do this." Britany said. "But okay." She took out her purse and handed them a few bills. "Don't get into any actual trouble okay?"
"Promise." Jesús said gleefully.
Kyler turned to Mateo. "Coming?"
Mateo looked unsurely at Brittany, then Santana, then back at his brothers, who were both looking expectant.
"Ummm."
"Are you coming or not?" Jesús asked.
With a glance at Sophia, who still looked slightly shaken up, Mateo nodded.
"Yeah, I'm coming."
Jesús and Kyler broke into identical grins. Jesús pulled him forward, ruffling his overgrown hair.
"Nice." Kyler chuckled. "Let's go get them."
He, Jesús, Mateo, Nicholi, Ryan and Kaycee took off running.
"Go with them please." Brittany asked Jessie, who nodded and followed the group of kids.
"I think I'll stay with the adults and leave them to it." Jean said, chuckling.
Antoine said something to his father in rapid French, then walked leisurely in the direction Kyler and the others had gone in.
"He wants to see what a bunch of ten year olds come up with." Jean translated.
"Oh I think he'll be surprised." Brittany said, walking the rest of the way to Santana now that there were less kids between them. "When Kyler and Jesús decide to be naughty, they're a real trouble making duo."
"I believe you." Jean laughed.
"Mami, can we go on the Ferris wheel now?" Sophia asked.
Santana felt like a lump had formed over her vocal chords. She looked down at Sophia, baffled by the fact that Sophia didn't even know what had just happened. No one knew. No one knew that Santana's worst fear had just played out. Even though she now knew it had just been a stupid prank, she couldn't shake the feeling. Right now all she wanted to do was take all of her kids home.
"You don't want to see your brother's revenge in your honour?" Brittany asked, filling the silence that had began to stretch on as Santana struggled to answer.
Sophia shook her head.
"They don't want to go on the Ferris wheel. If we wait for them to play their prank they'll say we should go to the haunted house, cause you promised they could."
"Alright. Jean are you up for the Ferris wheel?"
"Sure." Jean shrugged.
"You guys go ahead." Santana said when Brittany turned to her. "I need…" She looked around, floundering for an excuse, "uh…the bathroom." She finally said.
Brittany frowned, taking yet another step to her. Santana shook her head, stopping Brittany in her tracks.
"You guys have fun at up there." She said, smiling at Sophia. "Take lots of pictures for me."
"Okay." Sophia said happily. "Let's go." She said to her friends, leading the group to the Ferris wheel. Brittany stayed back.
"Santana what happened?"
Santana swallowed, watching Sophia walk away, fighting the urge to call her back.
"Santana?"
Santana licked her lips.
"I thought I saw Kevin."
"Here?" Brittany gasped.
"Yeah. I thought that's why she ran."
"Oh…god" Brittany said solemnly, pulling Santana into a hug. Santana found herself fighting a sudden rush of tears, Brittany's embrace only intensifying her emotions. She took a deep breath and pulled back.
"I need a minute." She said. "I'll go sit in the car."
"Okay." Brittany said, still looking worried. "Do you want me to join you-"
"No." Santana said quickly. "Stay with her. I'll feel better if you're with her."
"Okay." Brittany nodded. She pulled Santana into another quick hug. "Call me if you need me."
"I will."
Brittany pulled back, kissed her, and then let her go.
Taking another deep breath, Santana turned away and headed for the car.
She might as well have parked in another country for how far the walk felt. She couldn't help looking around, every tall or blonde man setting her on edge. By the time Santana was getting to the car her heart was racing again. She leaned heavily against it, taking deep breaths. The thought of Sophia coming face to face with the man who had given her nightmares for two years after Santana and Brittany had adopted her, the man who'd given her such fear and trust issues that Santana sometimes saw that flash of fear whenever they left Sophia somewhere, like she still wasn't sure they'd come back for her. The thought of Sophia ever seeing him again made Santana want to throw up. It made her want to take her car and drive it into every blonde man she could see.
Just sitting here wasn't going to help. Her skin felt like it was crawling, she needed to do something, but she didn't want to scare her kids. They were having such a good day and the last thing she wanted to do was give them something to worry about. So instead, she drove to the hospital.
Mr. Greyson wasn't in the ICU, which thankfully meant he was fine. He wasn't allowed non-familial visitors, the nurse told her with a huge smile, but she would make an exception for Santana. When she asked for an autograph Santana obliged, knowing it was probably what she wanted in exchange for breaking the rules. When they got to his room, Santana was glad to see that he was sitting up and talking.
"Knock, knock." The nurse called as she led Santana in. "Mr Greyson you have a very special-"
"Oh my god!" The lady sitting beside Mr. Greyson's bed shot out of her chair, backing up all the way to the wall. "OH MY GOD!"
Mr. Greyson laughed.
"Mrs Lopierce." He said, dipping his head in greeting.
Santana let out a long breath, and with it the guilt she'd been feeling over Mr. Greyson getting shot.
"Glad to see you're alive Mr. Greyson."
"Holy shit Will she knows your name." The woman, still pressed up against the wall, hissed loudly.
"Santana Lopez-Pierce." Santana said, walking forward with her hand outstretched. Tripping over herself, the lady rushed to shake it. "Nice to meet you."
"Oh my gooooood" She said under her breath.
Again Mr. Greyson laughed.
"Meet my sister Vivian."
"What…what….what are you….?" Vivian's eyes were darting all over Santana's face and her hand, still holding onto Santana's, was shaking.
"Doing here?" Santana finished.
She nodded vigorously.
"Well Mr. Greyson-"
"It's none of your business who my friends are Vi."
"You're friend?!" Vivian asked shrilly.
"Yes. Now do you mind giving as a second to talk?"
She looked pained at the suggestion. She still hadn't let go of Santana's hand, which Santana found very amusing.
"I promise not to leave immediately we're done." Santana said with a kind smile, "maybe you and I can chat a bit?"
"Oh my god I would love that. I would love that so much. Okay, I'll give you a minute. Call me when you're done."
"Yeah." Mr. Greyson said.
"You better call me!" She said threateningly, moving forward to slap Mr. Greyson's foot. As she did so she pulled Santana forward, making her stumble. "Oh" She gasped, turning back to Santana.
"Maybe I can have my hand back?" Santana laughed.
"Right, sorry." She chuckled nervously, finally letting Santana's hand go. "See you Santana Lopez. I will see you right?"
"Yup." Santana nodded. "I'll be here."
"Okay. Bye Santana Lopez."
"Bye." Santana laughed.
Vivian walked to the door and opened it.
"I'll go get something from the cafeteria while I wait for you to finish talking to Santana Lopez."
"Vivian get out of here!"
"Okay bye Santana Lopez." She waved excitedly. Santana waved back. Vivian shut the door.
"She's a fan….if you couldn't tell."
Santana's smile faded slowly as she turned back to Mr. Greyson. She sighed.
"What happened?"
He shrugged. "I have no idea."
"Did he freak out when he found you-"
She stopped short as Mr. Greyson shook his head.
"I hadn't even gone in."
"So…?" Santana walked up to the bed.
"I was lurking around, trying to come up with some kind of plan. House keeping came at eleven, like it did everyday. She walked right passed me. I remember she looked at me funny, like she wanted to ask what I was doing but didn't get paid enough to care. I played it off, told her something about leaving my key in the car. As I was walking away I heard yelling, then suddenly a gunshot. I barely had time to turn around and the next thing I knew I was shot, lying on the ground in more pain than I have ever felt in my life."
Santana took the seat Vivian had previously been sitting in, dropping her head into her hands.
"I'm sorry." She said heavily.
Mr. Greyson shrugged. "My job's dangerous sometimes, and you warned me."
Santana shook her head. "I never thought he'd outright…shoot you. I knew he was dangerous but….he killed her. She's dead. You could have died too."
"Drugs." Mr. Greyson said simply.
Santana looked up at him. "And now he's out there. I don't know where he is and he's clearly lost his fucking mind."
"Since I've been shot for you, can I ask…." He trailed off. Santana raised her eyebrows. "Who is he to you?"
Santana licked her lips, sitting up straight. She could see why Mr. Greyson deserved to know who Kevin was. If she'd been shot she would like to know what she'd been shot for as well, but she didn't want to tell him. She didn't want to say out loud that he was connected to her children. They were hers and Brittany's and she had yet to ever vocalize anything different.
"Someone very loosely connected to my family." She decided to stay. "He went to jail years ago but just got out, and I was worried he'd try get in touch."
"Were you hiding from him?"
"I'm a celebrity. My life is very public, I'm all over the tv and magazines. It's not a very efficient way to hide from someone is it?"
"No." Mr. Greyson chuckled, his head falling back against the pillows. "But I guess it's not really hiding if he didn't know who he was looking for."
Santana narrowed her eyes, cocking her head.
"I've been a private investigator for a long time Mrs. Lopierce." Mr. Greyson said. "Even without all the information, it's not hard to put a few pieces together when you're watching someone's every move for weeks."
"Fair enough." Santana said. Trying not to let her mind dwell on the fact that Kevin was still at large, Santana cast around for something to say. "Um…so how long will you be in here for?"
"Ten days at least."
Santana cringed. "I…should I….I feel like this is my fault." She stammered, looking around the room. "I should cover your medical-"
"No." Mr. Greyson said forcefully. Santana's eyes snapped to him. "First, I have great insurance, so don't bother paying, and second…." He sighed, "It's no more your fault than the cleaning lady's."
Santana frowned. "How? You were in there because of-"
"And I got shot because she went into his room…in theory."
"Oh." Santana nodded. "Yeah but-"
"The only person whose fault it is, is that psychopath Kevin's."
"What am I going to do?" Santana asked heavily. "I don't know what to do from here. I can't keep…"
She realised suddenly that she was talking to a virtual stranger, so instead of finishing her thought out loud, she took in a sharp breath and stood up.
"I wanted to come make sure you were okay. I was really worried that the news wasn't exaggerating for once."
"Well…" Mr. Greyson held out his arms, smiling. "As you can see, it'll take more than one bullet to kill me."
Santana couldn't smile. She knew he was trying to make light of the situation, but someone was dead, even if it wasn't him. Maybe she couldn't be blamed for that, but she still felt bad.
"Yeah, thank god." She said honestly. "But now that I know you're okay, I'll let you rest. I left without telling my family I was going so I should get back."
"Okay." Mr. Greyson nodded. "She'll kill me if I don't at least try so…what about my sister?"
"Oh." Santana fought a groan of irritation. "Right, yeah. Call her back."
She took a deep breath, getting into the headspace she usually got into for meet and greets. That was the only way she was going to be able to make it through what was likely to be at least half an hour of dealing with an energetic, enthusiastic fan. The last thing she wanted was for Vivian to think she was cold or unfriendly just because her mind was miles away.
Vivian was walking into the room less than a minute after Mr. Greyson had called her. She walked straight to Santana and gave her a hug.
"Hi Santana Lopez." She said happily.
Santana plastered on a smile and hugged her back. "Hi Vivian."
As soon as she could, Santana excused herself and left the hospital. She'd signed about ten different things, which Vivian had bought from the gift shop in the hospital, and taken several pictures. She also knew everything about Vivian and Mr. Greyson's family. They had another sister, who was in college, their parents were divorced and both lived in Arizona, in the same town as their grandparents and where Mr. Greyson and Vivian had grown up. Vivian and Mr. Greyson were roommates, had two dogs, Bailey and Walker, and lived in a two bedroom apartment.
Santana felt she'd engaged more than enough, so she didn't feel bad for leaving, even though Vivian tried everything short of begging to get her to stay.
When she got back to the park, she texted Brittany. She didn't think she could go back into the crowd; her anxiety was already back just being in the parking lot. So she simply told Brittany that she'd wait in the car until they were ready to go home. She played candy crush for several minutes, and then called Emma to talk about her upcoming tour rehearsals. Brittany and the kids came back while she was still on the phone.
"Mami we got into a-"
Santana held up her finger to stop Jesús' loud announcement.
"Oh sorry." He whispered, climbing into the car.
"Wednesday is fine. I don't want to audition any dancers to tell you the truth Emma. By now you know what I'm looking for. Why don't we just use the same dancers from my other tour?"
Brittany opened the passenger door, dropping her purse on the floor and her phone by the gearbox.
"They got into a fight." She said, a giggle behind her words.
Santana frowned. She turned back to look at the kids and found them all soaking wet.
"What happened?" She asked.
"I was trying to tell you, we got into a fight!" Jesús said excitedly.
"Hang on. Emma, the kids are back. Can we talk later?"
"Sure Santana. But before you go I need you to say out loud that you will be there tomorrow to audition your new drummer."
Santana chuckled. "You know it was annoying when you treated me like a kid when I was twenty four. I'm thirty now…"
"I'll stop the day I trust you to act like an adult. Let me hear you say it."
Santana rolled her eyes. "I will be there tomorrow to audition my new drummer."
"Pinky promise?"
"Emma!" Santana laughed.
"Alright see you tomorrow Santana. Say hi to Brittany for me."
"I will. Bye."
She hung up.
"Emma says hi."
"Hi." Brittany grinned. "So you're going to the office tomorrow?"
"Yeah." Santana pouted.
"Can I come too?"
Brittany and Santana looked at each other, shocked.
"Yeah Soph." Santana said. "Of course you can."
Sophia smiled, then climbed into the back beside Kaycee.
Santana raised her eyebrows at Brittany. Brittany shrugged.
"So you got into a fight?" Santana asked.
"Yeah." Kyler giggled. "With the boys who scared Sophia."
"A water fight?" Santana clarified.
"Yeah. Mateo started it." Jesús said proudly.
"What?" Santana chocked. Brittany nodded.
"They were being really mean." Mateo said. "They kept calling us babies."
"Me and Jesús wanted to fight them." Ryan said. "But Antoine wouldn't let us." He mumbled angrily.
"Thank god right?" Brittany whispered to Santana. Santana nodded.
"Then Niki came out of nowhere with a water gun and shot one of the boys right in the face!"
"Then they got mad and started chasing him. So we all went and got water guns and chased them around instead."
Then they got even bigger water guns-"
"And you got into a water fight." Santana finished laughing.
"Yeah." Jesús and Kyler said.
"So it sounds like you guys had a good day."
"So good." Mateo said.
Santana couldn't help but smile at how proud of himself he was.
"So are we ready to go home?"
All kids were now seated with their seatbelts strapped.
"Yeah." They all said.
"Great."
As Santana started the car, Brittany leaned into her.
"How are you?"
"Better." She said honestly. "I went to see him-"
"What?! WHY?"
Santana's eyes widened as she turned to Brittany.
"No, no, Mr. Greyson. At the hospital."
"Oh." Brittany exhaled. "Okay…and how is he?"
"He's fine. He'll be out in a week and a half."
"Good." Brittany said, clearly relieved. "Will you stop beating yourself up about it now?"
Santana gave a small smile. "I think I can start trying to let myself off the hook, yeah."
"Good." Brittany took her hand and kissed it.
Later that night, as they were all getting ready for bed, Santana got a text that had her feeling so relieved she had to fight tears.
"Britt!" She yelled, her voice cracking slightly as she rushed to the bathroom where Brittany was showering.
"Yeah?"
"They got him."
"Who?"
"Kevin." Santana said urgently. "They caught him in Fremont, at a gas station."
"Oh my god." Brittany hastily wiped the water from her face. "They got him? How do you know?"
"Eve just texted. She said she's been following the man hunt and the police just put out a statement saying they caught him."
"Oh my god." Brittany, unlike Santana, could not hold back her tears of joy. "It's over! He's gone for good right?"
"Definitely." Santana nodded firmly.
"I can't believe it."
Santana leaned heavily against the sink, shaking her head. The weight that had been lifted off her chest was so huge it felt like there had been an actual obstruction, keeping her lungs from being able to expand fully and with just one text she could breathe. They didn't have to worry endlessly whenever they weren't with their kids. She could sleep without worrying about Kevin stalking them, showing up out of nowhere.
"It's actually over." She said, letting out a long breath.
"Come here." Brittany said. Santana's body obeyed without her having to think. She simply felt herself drift towards Brittany, collapsing into her open arms. She didn't care that she was getting wet, in fact she barely noticed. Brittany hugged her tight, letting out a long deep breath as well. Santana felt like she could stay like this forever, but after about a minute Brittany pulled, back, wiping away some tears.
"Wanna hop in here to celebrate?" Brittany asked, smirking to try and lighten the mood.
Smiling, Santana shook her head.
"Actually…I think I'm gonna go check on Sophia."
"Honey she's fine. She doesn't even know there was anything to be worried about."
"I know but…I just want to check."
"Okay." Brittany said sofly. "See you in a bit."
Santana left the bathroom and went to Sophia's room. She was sitting cross legged on her bed, combing her hair, music playing softly from the ipad beside her.
"Hi mami."
"Hey mija. How are you doing?"
"Good." Sophia said. "I'm not really sleepy though."
"Mhh." Santana hummed thoughtfully. "You know what I used to do when I couldn't sleep at night?"
"Call mama?" Sophia said cheekily. Santana laughed.
"No." She sat down on Sophia's bed. "I used to watch movies. Sometimes it would work and I'd fall asleep halfway through."
"And if it didn't work?"
"Then I got to watch movies all night long." Santana grinned.
"Abuela and abuelo would let you watch movies all night?" Sophia asked, amazed.
Santana shrugged. "They weren't really home a lot, but yeah they didn't mind."
"Cool."
"Hey," she tapped Sophia's foot. "What do you say you and I watch some movies?"
"All night?" Sophia asked with wide eyes.
"If we can make it." Santana laughed.
"Just you and me?"
"Yeah. An SMLP date night."
"Yes!" Sophia said excitedly. "Yes, yes, yes."
"Okay. Let me go get my laptop."
"Okay."
Santana quickly went downstairs to get her laptop from the dining room. She checked in on Jesús and Kyler on her way back, surprised but happy to find Mateo in the room with them. The lights were off and they'd built a fort between their beds, which they were all inside.
"What are you guys doing?" She called. They all screamed, which made Santana laugh, then they all poked their heads out of the fort.
"Mami you scared us!" Mateo said. Santana could barely see his eyes, his hair had grown so long it was falling over them completely.
"Sorry," Santana giggled, "I didn't mean to."
"We're playing a video game." Jesús answered her.
"With the lights off?"
"Yeah."
"Okay." She ignored the soda can she could see from between the sheets, deciding to let them have their fun. Like she'd told Brittany, it was summer after all. "Niki come here papi."
Mateo crawled out of the fort and walked to her.
"Yes?"
Santana knelt down, pulling him into a hug. He hugged her back, resting his head on her shoulder.
"I love you my baby." She told him.
"I love you too mami."
Santana hugged him tighter, feeling a lump form in her throat. She pulled back and kissed him, then with a sigh, stood up.
"Alright…are you okay here?"
"Yeah." He grinned, returning to his brothers. Santana blew both Jesús and Kyler kisses.
"I love you boys."
"Love you mami." They said together.
"Okay. Sorry for scaring you, carry on." She shut the door as they scrambled back into the fort.
Sophia was ready in bed when Santana returned, her ipad no longer playing music.
"What are we going to watch?" She asked excitedly.
"You choose mija. Whatever you want to watch, I'm happy with."
"Okay."
Santana handed her the laptop, then climbed into her bed. Sophia used one of her pillows to prop the laptop up and then snuggled into Santana.
"Let's check Netflix." Sophia said. Santana could only nod.
She was glad she was behind Sophia, because her emotions were getting the better of her. She looked down at Sophia's face, watching the way her expression changed as she looked through the movies. All she was seeing right now, was the tiny three year old that had walked into the social worker's office, a cut on her leg, wild hair cascading down her back and so much fear in her eyes. All she could think about were all the nights they'd woken up to Sophia crying, all the times she'd clung to Santana's neck, refusing to go to school, or be dropped at Quinn's or go near any man at all. She and Brittany had worked so hard to make her feel safe and loved, and heal the trauma she'd gotten from Kevin, who'd abused her physically and emotionally. He couldn't be called Sophia's father, Santana couldn't call him Sophia's father, even in her own head. And now that he'd been caught and was no longer a threat to her or her kids, Santana felt the need to make him understand the non-existent role he played in Sophia and Mateo's life.
Maybe she'd pay him a visit, just to make sure he knew who Sophia and Mateo's parents actually were.
Brittany woke up the next morning in bed by herself. She wasn't surprised by this, because when she'd gone to kiss all the kids goodnight Santana and Sophia were still watching movies. So she'd expected Santana to fall asleep in Sophia's bed. She stretched, yawning wide, content to just lay in bed for a few minutes.
The year was going by so fast. Too fast, for her liking. Quinn's wedding was in less than a month, and in a week's time she and Santana would officially be married for twelve years. It didn't feel like twelve years, but at the same time it felt like fifty. The fact was that even when she'd only known Santana a year it had felt like she'd known her for her entire life. Brittany barely remembered what her life had even been like without Santana. Who had she been? She met Santana when she was fourteen, so Santana had been around for more than half her life, and they had another sixty years together, if they both made it to ninety, which was Brittany's plan. That thought excited her. The thought that she had so many more years to look forward to with her best friend. She couldn't have imagined their lives now, ten years ago, so she knew the next ten, twenty, thirty, would all bring something new. How would she changed? How would Santana change? What would stay the same?
For one thing, she knew she would never stop being amazed by Santana. She hoped to death that each of her kids found someone like Santana. Someone who was their biggest fan and number one cheerleader, and partner in crime and voice of reason and rock, when everything went downhill.
This year had been tough on both of them. From adjusting to Santana being back at work and having to tour, to everything with Kevin. They'd been tested this year, more so than Brittany could remember in a long, long time. It had felt really bad at times, with them barely speaking to each other or fighting whenever they did. There had been miscommunication and anger and frustration, but they'd always managed to find their way back to each other and fix things. So Brittany wasn't worried. Whatever the future brought, she knew they'd make it through, together.
She decided that even though twelve wasn't a milestone year, she would give Santana an anniversary to remember. Their tenth year of marriage had been easy and fun and hadn't felt like much of an achievement, but this year…Brittany felt like they needed to do something big to celebrate.
An idea began forming in her mind. She didn't want to go too big and interfere with Quinn's wedding, but it still needed to feel extra special.
Brittany grinned up at the ceiling as all the pieces began falling into place. Oh yeah, this was going to be fun.
Santana woke up at a quarter to noon, an hour after all the boys had woken up. By which time Brittany ad already made breakfast and gone out for a bike ride with them after eating, and come back to find Santana cuddled under a blanket in the back porch with a cup of coffee.
"Hey," she smiled.
"Hi babe." Brittany said. "You finally woke up huh?"
"Barely." Santana groaned. She did still look exhausted. "We slept at four."
"Wow." Brittany chuckled. "That's longer than I thought you'd make it."
"I shouldn't have done it." Santana said, shaking her head. "I really am too old-"
"Oh shut up." Brittany laughed, sitting down beside her. "We're not old."
"I feel like I pulled an all-nighter! I am so tired B!"
"That's because we travelled and haven't actually rested since getting back."
"Mh." Santana grunted, taking a sip of her coffee. "And now I have to go audition drummers."
"Fun." Brittany cheered.
Santana merely shook her head.
"What about Sophia? Is she still gonna come with you?"
"Let's see what time she wakes up." Santana laughed. "But I don't think so."
"The one time she actually wants to go to the studio and you blew it." Brittany teased, shaking her head. "It might never happen again you know?"
Santana giggled. "I'll take last night over a day in the studio."
Brittany cuddles closer to her, resting her head on Santana's shoulder.
"How was it?"
"Good." Santana smiled.
"Do you feel better?"
Santana took a moment to answer, which told Brittany all she needed to know.
"It'll take a while for the adrenaline and…stress of it all to fully leave our systems." Brittany said, "Even though we know he's been caught."
"Yeah…"
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"There's not really much to say B." Santana said quietly. "I got scared yesterday, that's all."
"It'll go away."
"On it's own?"
Brittany shrugged. "Maybe?" Santana shook her head, letting out a long breath. "What?"
"I just feel like everything's so…I don't know…unresolved or something."
"He's been caught though babe-"
"I know but it was all leading up to something and now…" She let out a frustrated sigh. "He asked to see us, then I met him without knowing it was him, then he's getting high and shooting people. It just doesn't feel resolved to me."
Brittany rubbed soothing up and down Santana's arm.
"Give it time."
Again, Santana shook her head. "I don't know."
"You don't know what?" Brittany asked, sitting up slightly.
"If time will be enough for this."
"What else can you do?"
Santana didn't answer, but there was a look in her eyes that Brittany didn't like. Before she could question it, Santana was taking in a sharp breath and smiling down at her.
"What are your plans for today?"
Sophia did end up waking up in time to go with Santana to the studio. Brittany and the boys decided to spend the day at home. It seemed the jet lag was finally catching up with her kids as well, because Mateo even took a nap just after Santana left. Even though she really wanted to join him, there were several loads of laundry that needed to be done, and Brittany still needed to actually mentor Ryan and Kaycee. She wanted to spend a bit more time teaching them how to choreograph to get them ready for another competition in October.
Kaleb brought them over just as Brittany had put the third batch of clothes in the drier, and they all headed down to her dance studio. Three hours later she called it a day. They climbed back up to the main floor to find Quinn in the living room.
"Quinn!" Brittany said happily. "When did you get here?"
"An hour ago…ish." Quinn stood up and hugged Brittany.
"Why didn't you call?"
Quinn shrugged. "I didn't need to. Hi." She smiled and waved at Ryan and Kaycee. They waved happily before running out to join Jesús and Kyler who were in the swimming pool.
"You remember my partner Kaleb right?"
"Of course." Quinn shook his hand. "Nice to see you again."
"You too." Kaleb said. "Where's your baby girl….Abby?"
"Addy. Addison." Quinn corrected. "And she's with my finance."
"Ah."
"You didn't bring Addy? Then what are you doing here?"
Quinn narrowed her eyes. "You're the one who was complaining about me not spending as much time with you since I had a baby."
"I was kidding." Brittany chuckled. "I'm always happy to see you."
"Damn right." Quinn sat back down. "But I'm actually here so you can help me with my seating chart."
"Quinn are you kidding me?" Brittany groaned, dropping dramatically onto the couch. "How can you possibly still have more wedding prep tasks?"
"You have to do seating as close to as possible in case people cancel or there are last minute RSVPs."
"Why don't you just let people sit wherever they want?"
"Because I do not want any drama at my wedding. I have to manage relationships, egos and personalities in order to make sure everything goes smoothly."
"As if Santana will let anyone cause drama."
"Yeah well…" Quinn smacked her lips, "she hasn't seen my dad in a while."
"Oh crap…I forgot he was coming."
"Yeah, with his wife, so my mother is going to be a pain. Then where do I sit Shelby and Beth? And the glee gang? Do I really want them all on the same table?"
"No." Brittany said immediately. "That's a recipe for disaster."
"Exactly." Quinn said smugly. "Hence, the seating chart."
"Urgh, fine. Are you going to do the whole 3D thing."
"Later. For now I just need to create a draft."
"Okay what do you need?"
Santana gently swiveled her chair left and right, her arms crossed over her chest and head resting back on the head rest. Three drummers in and she honestly couldn't tell the difference between them. You could tell her it was the same guy each time and she wouldn't have known. When the drumming stopped, she sat up straight and uncrossed her arms. He was breathing a little heavily, looking hopefully at her.
"Um…" She stood up. "That was really good. Thank you."
"Yeah no problem at all. I can go again, maybe play something else?"
"No, that's fine." Santana held her hand out to stop him as he was already getting his sticks ready to go again. "Just a question…"
"Yeah?"
"Have you listened to any of my music?"
The drummer seemed taken back by the question. He stared blankly up at her. When all she did was cock her head, he nodding quickly.
"Yes, of course."
"Right. Besides the ones who learned to play for this audition."
He swallowed.
"I uh…I mean I've heard them-"
"Name one." Santana cut off what was shaping out to be a pathetic lie.
"Uh…there's one…I think it's called….someone to love…"
Jade snorted, not even bothering to conceal her laughter. Lucas turned off his keyboard, shaking his head.
"I mean I can listen to them, I liked the few I heard. If you want I can go listen to them all, like if I get the gig of course I'll…you know…"
"Yeah…thanks for coming in." Santana said. "This isn't going to work though, unfortunately."
Looking very disappointed, the drummer stood up and left.
Santana walked back to the couch, where Sophia was lying down, and dropped on top of her. Sophia screamed.
"Mami! Get off!"
"I can't. I'm dying."
"Mami." Sophia giggled. "You're heavy."
"I'm not that heavy."
"You are! You're squashing me."
Santana gave it a few more seconds before moving off Sophia and sitting beside her.
"Well, that was a bust."
"Was there any difference between him and the last guy?" Jade asked.
"I was thinking the exact same thing." Santana said. "Urgh this is so boring! Can't you guys just do this without me. I'll perform with whoever you pick."
"Yeah right." Lucas laughed, sitting in the office chair Santana had previously been in.
"First of all, it's your bloody band, so you have to pick its members," Jade said, "and second, we're not the ones always firing the damn drummers cause we don't like their personalities in the first place."
"That's not true." Santana held up her finger in protest. "I fired Malek because he fu-" she looked down sharply at Sophia. "Sorry honey, I need to block your ears for a minute."
Amused, Sophia nodded. Santana clamped her hands over Sophia's ears.
"Malek kissed me, in case you both forgot, and on top of it all was developing feelings for me, or something." She let go off Sophia. "How was I supposed to keep him in the band?"
"Fair." Lucas said.
"And before that Luke retired, I didn't fire him."
"What about Asher?" Jade asked with a smirk, cause I recall you saying you couldn't stand to look at his face anymore."
"Mami" Sophia giggled. "That's so rude."
"That is mean, I didn't say that honey. Jade is lying." She gave Jade a look that told her not to contradict her. "I fired him because he had bad body hygiene, and always stressed me out with how long it would take him to learn a set."
"Warren?" Lucas asked, spinning round only to catch himself on the table and stop abruptly. "He was a good player."
"But his pre-concert anxiety was beginning to rub off on me."
"Yeah I have to agree with Santana there." Jade said. "Watching the man throw up right before a show really threw off my groove."
"Yuck." Sophia crinkled her nose in disgust.
"At this point I might actually just use Jesús."
"Does he want to?" Lucas asked.
"Of course." Santana laughed. "Do you know my son? What kind of question is that?"
"We all know you cannot employ your ten year old to be a full time member of your band."
"Eleven." Sophia and Santana corrected at the same time.
"My bad, eleven."
"Urgh….sigh." Santana said dramatically." In a few years maybe."
"We'll find someone." Lucas said.
"Not from this batch of jokers." Santana said, turning to look at the door. "It's like they're all…straight out of Julliard or something. Where's the passion?"
"You want passion?" Jade asked. "Maybe we're looking in the wrong place."
"What do you mean?"
"Think about it, did Lucas or I audition for you?"
"No I was handed a fully formed band. I don't know who chose you."
"Well…we didn't audition for anyone. We were both in bands, playing dive bar gigs every night, and we got recruited."
Lucas nodded, a fond smile on his face.
"So what are you saying?" Santana asked.
"We need to go out and find a drummer in their element, doing what they love because they love it, not because they want to be signed by a huge label. That's where you'll find your passion."
Santana bit her lip, thinking. She definitely did not want to stay in here all day, listening to the same thing over and over, and she really needed to find a drummer so they could start rehearsals for the tour as soon as possible.
"Okay." She finally said, standing up. "Where do we start."
"A jazz bar." Lucas said at once. "No better drummers in the world."
"Besides maybe rock," Jade said, "but that's not what we play so."
"Alright come on Soph," Santana said, pulling Sophia up, "are you up for a field trip?"
It was interesting to Santana how unbothered Sophia was today. She hadn't complained about being bored, even though she obviously had been at the studio, and she didn't complain when they were getting to the fifth club. They'd heard some good drummers at each one, more inspiring than the ones who'd come to audition, but none that really called out to Santana. Now they were walking leisurely down the street, all with ice cream cones that they'd stopped to get at Sophia's insistence.
"Heads up." Lucas said, nodding his head to the left. Santana saw three men with cameras pointed right at them.
"Oh boy…" She sighed. "Soph." She took Sophia's hand. "There's some paparazzi there okay? So don't let go of my hand."
Sophia nodded, eyeing the paparazzi.
"They just want good pictures right? What if we pose?" She asked. "Will they leave us alone?"
Santana grinned. "It can't hurt."
"Let's do it." Sophia said.
Again, this was very unlike her, but Santana didn't question it. Still holding Sophia's hand, the two of them struck several poses, smiling and waving at the paparazzi. They didn't come over, thankfully, and as they walked away Santana realised they weren't following them either.
"Genius." She said, bending to kiss Sophia's head.
"Thanks." Sophia grinned.
They arrived at the last club on their list for day. It was getting too late to be entering these kind of places with Sophia, so Santana planned to keep looking tomorrow if this one yielded no results.
"Last one, then we go home for dinner kay?" Santana said to Sophia, scratching the back of her neck.
He pointed at Sophia. "It's past seven. No kids past seven."
"She won't drink, we promise." Jade told the bouncer as they walked in.
"I hope not." He laughed.
Inside was a bit emptier than the previous places. Waiters and bartenders seeming to be getting ready for opening.
"I guess this is one of those late night ones." Lucas said. "That open at ten."
"Looks like it."
They walked right up to the very small stage the band was testing on.
"Hey." Santana called. The lead vocalist turned to her, her eyes popping as she recognized her immediately.
"Oh my god!"
"Yeah it's the greatest day of your life." Jade said. "You mind if we listen to you warm up?"
The whole band seemed too stunned to speak. They looked at each other with the same shocked, wide eyed expression.
"I know it's kind of weird." Santana said, "but as you can see I'm here with my daughter," she draped her arm over Sophia's shoulders, "so I can't exactly stick around till this place opens up." She gave a light laugh.
"Right." The singer chuckled.
"But we still want to listen to some nice live music before we go home. Right honey?"
"Yeah." Sophia nodded shyly, her cheeks pinking slightly. She shrunk into Santana's side. "Please?"
"Aww." Santana heard the bass player coo.
"Yeah of fucking course." The singer said. "Of fucking course we'll play for you, you're fucking Santana Lopez. We'll do whatever the fuck you want."
"Mh" Santana clenched her jaw as Sophia giggled at the excessive cursing.
Jade nudged Santana's side. "That's what you used to sound like."
"Shut up."
The band started to play. For the first song they were all very tense, focused on Santana rather than on performing.
"Baby you wanna see what it feels like to sit at a bar?" Santana asked.
"Yeah!" Sophia said excitedly. "Can I order something too."
"You can order a root beer float if they have one."
"Yes!" Sophia stepped away from Santana, skipping to the bar. Santana followed behind her leisurely.
Like the band, the bartender recognized Santana. So though she knew from his expression when Sophia asked him that he didn't have root beer, nor the vanilla ice cream required, he told Sophia that her root beer float was coming right up. Santana just smiled in thanks.
"And for you?" He asked, putting up a valiant effort to keep his voice from shaking.
"Virgin daiquiri."
"On the house." He said, eagerly moving to make the drink.
"No that's not-"
But he moved away before she could finish. Ah well, she'd just leave a twenty on the counter before leaving.
"I can't wait to be a grown up." Sophia said, swinging her legs which were feet from the floor.
"Oh yeah? Why's that?"
Sophia looked at her liked she'd asked a stupid question.
"Look." She threw her hands up, gesturing round the room. "You get to come in here all the time, and hang out with your friends and listen to good music and order fancy drinks."
Santana laughed.
"Yeah, you're not wrong I guess."
"How come you and mama don't go to places like this all the time?"
"We used to, before we had kids." She teased, widening her eyes meaningfully. Sophia frowned.
"Really?" She asked. "You don't go out because you have to stay home with us?"
Santana smacked her lips. "Pretty much."
"That sucks" Sophia said sadly.
"Don't be silly." Santana laughed, gently shoving her head. "Mama and I love staying home with you guys."
Sophia's nose crinkled. "Why?"
"We kinda love you four…in case you didn't know."
"Yeah but...still."
Santana shrugged. "You're the best things in our live babe. Going out and listening to music gets boring after an hour or two, but you kids are awesome all the time. Mama and I go out once in a while, just not all the time. We had enough if it in our early twenties. Trust me."
Sophia cocked her head, clearly thinking hard.
"What?" Santana asked, laughing.
"I love you too mami." She leaned over, hugging Santana awkwardly. "In case you didn't know." She smirked.
"I know baby."
"Here you go." The bartender placed Santana's drink on the counter.
"Where's mine?"
"Sorry…" His eyes flicked to Santana, like he was waiting for her to get upset. "Five more minutes. Please."
"She'll wait. No rush. Mija you can taste mine."
Sophia happily picked Santana's fancy glass. "It looks like a smoothie."
"Sweeter than a smoothie. Taste it."
As Sophia sipped her drink, Santana refocused on the band. They seemed to have forgotten that she was there, which was her plan by removing herself from their line of sight to sit at the bar. They were having more fun with this one, the bass player and lead singer were clearly dating, if the way they were looking at each other as they sang into the same mic was any indication. The drummer, Santana noticed, had her eyes closed. She watched her for the entire duration of the song, watched the way her features changed, how she smiled after doing something particularly difficult, or playful, like when she spun her sticks. She kept her eyes closed the entire time, like she didn't care about the crowd or lack-there-of, or even the rest of the band. It was just her and her drum set.
Santana took her appearance in for the first time, paying attention to who she was.
She had shaved both sides of her head, and a bright blue streak in the remaining shoulder length brown hair. She was wearing an oversized basketball jersey, with a black x over the jersey number that looked like it had been written in marker. Then there was the large scar Santana could see even from this distance, that covered the entire length of her right arm from her wrist to just above her elbow. She flicked her hair back, and Santana saw another scar on her neck.
The song ended and Santana realised that she hadn't paid attention to anything but the drummer.
"Here you go." The bartender said, handing Sophia her root beer.
"Thank you." Sophia bounced excitedly in her seat as she took it.
Jade walked over to them, smiling, and Santana knew they were thinking the same thing.
"What did I tell you?" She asked when she reached them.
"Yeah you know what you're talking about sometimes."
"You like her don't you?"
"I do, but I want to talk to her first. I don't want to be looking for a drummer two months from now. I need this one to last."
"I hear you." Jade nodded. "So what do you want to do here?"
Santana took a minute to think.
"Will you stay here with Soph?"
"Sure." Jade shrugged.
"Thanks. I'll be right back."
She walked right up to the stage, climbed up it, and stood beside the singer.
"I got the bug." She said, the mic picking up her voice and projecting it throughout the room. "Mind if I perform something?"
"Yes! I mean no! No I don't fucking mind at all."
"Yeah. Um…I don't know your songs…but um…did you know any of mine?"
The bass player and singer looked at each other, much like Sophia had just looked at Santana. Like she'd asked something stupid.
"Yes we know your fucking songs. Are you kidding?"
"Great." Santana smiled. "Uh…can you do me a favour and not curse so much? My daughter can hear you."
"Oh sorry, sorry." She slapped her hand over her mouth. "No problem." She said from behind her hand.
"Okay so…why don't you guys pick whichever song you know best and we can do that one."
It took a few minutes for them to decide, but they finally settled on one of the songs from her last album, BSP. Santana wasn't surprised. That seemed to be most people's favourite.
She let the lead singer sing the melody, adding harmonies or backup instead. What she really wanted to see was if the drummer would play the song exactly, or change it up. She was glad when she heard subtle changes that kept the integrity of the song but felt like the drummer was inserting her personality into it. Santana suspected she would actually play it even more different, but was holding back because Santana was there. When the song ended, she was more than glad they had decided to stop auditions and come to where the performers were. She was going to have to say an extra thank you to Jade.
"That was awesome, thanks for letting me crash your warm up."
"Any time. Seriously any fuck-any time. Every night if you want."
Santana laughed.
"What's your name?"
"Leah."
Santana looked at the bass player.
"Cameron."
"Nicole." The pianist said.
"Sadie." The drummer said last.
Santana nodded.
"Do you like playing here Sadie?" She asked.
Sadie shrugged.
"It pays the bills and let's me do what I love. That's all I care about."
Santana had to fight back a smirk.
"Well…not to poach your drummer…" she said apologetically to the lead singer, "but I'm looking for a drummer. It'll pay more than just the bills and let you do what you love." She shrugged, pretending not to notice the drummer's eyes widen dramatically. "If you're interested, come by the studio-you know which-"
"I know which studio." she nodded.
"Okay. Yeah come by, let's talk."
Santana turned just in time to see Jade wiggling her eyebrows comically.
"Why are you always a fool?" Santana asked, walking towards her.
Jade sniggered.
"It keeps me young." She jerked her head at Sophia. "This is fun and all, but it's getting late."
As she said it, a group of people walked into the bar, clearly already drunk.
"Yup. Time to go mama." Santana told Sophia. "Finish up."
Sophia looked wearily at her drink. "I can't finish all this right now." She whined.
"You can go with the glass." The bartender told her. "Please, in fact I insists."
Though she didn't want to agree, Santana also didn't want to wait for Sophia to finish her drink. The more people that came in, the more likely a crowd would start to form around her, a drunk crowd no less, and then things would get dangerous.
"Thank you." She said sincerely, taking out a twenty from her purse.
"No, no, it's on the house."
"No." Was all Santana said, before taking the glass from Sophia so she could jump off the stool and they walked out.
"You better finish it before you get home love." Santana said, "otherwise you know your brothers will."
"I don't mind." Sophia shrugged. "Except Niki."
Santana hadn't even frowned fully before Sophia was adding a hasty "kidding"
"Mmmh" Santana said suspiciously. "You better be kidding. Come on let's go tell mama I took you to five different bars."
Giggling, they began their walk back to the studio.
When they got home, Sophia went straight to Quinn, hugging her tight and staying cuddled into her side on the couch.
"Hi mama." She said with a wave.
Santana giggled as Brittany turned with narrow eyes to Quinn.
"I will steal your daughter the way you've stolen mine, I hope you know that."
Quinn laughed. "You can try."
"I am exhausted." Santana said, sitting beside Brittany.
"Well you didn't sleep much."
"Yeah…I should go to sleep now if I'm going to have any hope of waking up in the morning."
"Why do you need to wake up in the morning? Are you going to the office?"
Santana hesitated. She'd been thinking all day about what she would do, to get the closure she needed with Kevin, but she hadn't yet come to a conclusion on whether she would actually do it. Yet suddenly, as Brittany stared at her, it was like she knew exactly what she wanted to do.
"No" she finally said, "I'm…I want to-"
"Tia what's this?" Sophia asked, pointing at the seating chart.
"I'm trying to organize where everyone will sit at my wedding."
"Why?"
"Cause I want people to have a good time. I don't want people to start arguing, or be bored at their table you know?"
"Oooh." Sophia nodded. "So who are you going to sit with?"
Santana, Brittany and Quinn laughed.
"Who do you think?" Quinn asked.
"Theo?"
"Yeah." Quinn laughed. "But you and your mums too. We'll be at the high table, like royalty."
"Cool." Sophia smiled.
"Oh I wanted to ask you, are you happy with the way your dress looked at your last fitting?"
"Yeah." Sophia nodded. "It was perfect."
"I think so too!" Quinn said happily, "You're going to look so beautiful honey."
"We both are. I can't wait for you to get married Tia."
"You and me both." Quinn said seriously, kissing the top of Sophia's head.
Sophia yawned and before she'd even closed her moth, yawned again. "I think I'm going to take a nap."
"It's not a nap at night." Brittany giggled. "That's just going to bed."
Sophia slumped dramatically over Quinn's lap. "Urgh Tia will you carry me? I'm too tired to walk."
"Here." Quinn pulled the blanket from beside her and dropped it on Sophia. "Sleep here. Cause I love you honey but I am not going to carry you anywhere."
"You couldn't even if you wanted to." Santana laughed. She stood up and stretched, yawning as well.
"I am gonna go shower, then take a nap too."
"Take me with you." Sophia said, holding out her hand.
"I can't carry you either babe. You're best luck is mama."
Sophia turned to Brittany, pouting.
"Come on." Brittany's chuckled, standing up. "Hop on my back."
"Yes!" Sophia climbed onto the couch then onto Brittany's back. "You're the best mama."
"Hey don't forget who took you to a bar."
"What?" Brittany frowned, adjusting Sophia on her back to a more comfortable position. "Wait you took her where?"
"A club." Sophia said, bouncing. "It was so cool. I sat to at the bar and even ordered a drink-"
"A root beer float." Santana said, at Brittany's baffled expression.
"What where you doing at a club?"
"Looking for a drummer." Sophia said.
"Yeah." Santana nodded. "And I think I found one. Plus it was almost completely empty."
"You think you found the drummer that you're going to keep for the next four months?" Quinn asked.
"I don't plan on changing drummers for at least a year."
Quinn scoffed. "Right. And what about when he falls in love with you as well?"
"I'll have you to warn me."
"Like you will even listen. I warned you this time but you ignored me."
"Fall in love with you as well?" Sophia frowned. "What do you mean Tia."
"She means like her fans." Brittany answered, seeing Quinn's wide eyes and knowing she had no idea how to answer. "Mami's fans fall in love with her and her music."
"Why is that a bad thing for her drummer?"
"It's a little unprofessional."
"Ooh."
"And on that note, let's get you to bed hun."
"What about dinner mija?" Santana asked, just remembering that neither of them had eaten.
"I'm not hungry."
It was still early, barely eight o'clock, so Santana didn't feel okay about letting Sophia go to bed without dinner. She'd almost definitely wake up hungry in the middle of the night, considering the last time they'd eaten a proper meal was before leaving the house.
"No baby." She said, "go eat something small please."
Sophia whined loudly as Brittany let go of her legs to let her slowly drop to the floor.
"You don't need to serve a lot, just enough so you don't get a tummy ache."
"Fine." Sophia muttered, before sulking into the kitchen.
"Good catch." Brittany said.
Santana nodded "I should probably eat something too. I don't want to be waking up at five in the morning cause I'm starving."
"Oh that reminds me, where are you going tomorrow morning?"
Santana went serious at once, staring hard into Brittany's eyes. A part of her didn't want to say what was on her mind. A huge part of her didn't want to tell Brittany that she'd had Eve find out where Kevin was being held and called to find out what time visiting hours were. She knew she would be able to go and come back without Brittany ever knowing, and she knew exactly how Brittany would react to finding out that she was even just entertaining thoughts about going anywhere near Kevin. She didn't really want to deal with Brittany panicking again, with the look of fear that would take over her features and the desperate way she would beg Santana not to do it. The lie was on the tip of her tongue. Brittany didn't suspect anything, and since she was actually planning on going out to try find another potential drummer it wouldn't really be a lie.
"Britt," She said, taking a deep breath, "I'm going to tell you this because we talked about half-truths and hiding things, and I promised I'd do better."
Brittany frowned. "Okay?"
"But me telling you this isn't me asking permission or opening it up for discussion. Not that I don't care what you have to say, you know I do-"
"Santana" Brittany said, taking a tentative step forward. Quinn sat up, looking concerned.
"I'm happy to hear how you feel about this but I am going to do it. I need to."
"Santana what are you talking about, you're scaring me."
Staring right into Brittany's eyes, Santana said six words she never in a million years thought she would.
"I want to go see Kevin."