Chapter 18 – Bellamy Blake
-Dream-
I was breathing heavy as I peeked out from behind the pillar I was hiding behind. I quickly hide myself when a man wearing the medical uniform appeared from the way I came. When I woke up they'd written on that stupid tablet only questions about me and wouldn't answer any of my questions about my parents or about Jona and his parents. So I'd escaped and I was currently trying to hide from them. Which is more trouble than I thought now that I couldn't hear anything. I'd already had to run from another that'd managed to find me.
When the man or another one of the other clinic people looking for me didn't show up and my breathing returned to normal I peek out again. Finding the hall empty I turn to continue where I was going but run into a body, sending me to the floor with the force. I look up scared I was now caught and was faced with a beautiful woman with long brown hair, hazel eyes, and a tape measure around her neck like the clinic people wore their scopes. Her mouth was moving, her face showing concern, as she crouched down in front of me and offered me a hand.
"No. I have to go to Arrow station." I tell her and she makes a slightly shocked face but it wasn't that face some of the clinic people gave me. The woman's face softened as she slowly took my hand, clearly saying something I couldn't hear or understand. I shake my head tears welling up in my eyes as I try and pull my hand from hers telling her "No. Please. I just want to see my parents and Jona." But she her grip doesn't loosen as she pulls me up and starts leading me down the hall.
I keep trying to pull my hand from hers until I realize we were going in the direction that I'd been trying to go. "You're taking me home?" I question her then as I look up at her. She looks down and gives me a smile and nods before her mouth moves again. My face scrunches and I tell her "I can't hear anymore."
That causes her to pause a moment, her face turning a little sad before she pulls me into a quick hug, one of her hands stroking the back of my head, before she takes my hand again and continues leading me. I was confused until we arrived outside my home. The guard were inside, clearing it of our belongings. Which could only mean my parents were dead.
My breathing picked up as I tore my hand from the woman's and took off to Jona's home. But just as I'm a few steps away I'm frozen in my tracks when a guard comes out of it, carrying some of Jona's father's belongings. Which could only mean that they were dead too. I fell to my knees, the world spinning around me as it blurred from the tears flowing freely from my eyes. This had to be why they wouldn't answer my questions…why I hadn't seen them at my bedside when I woke up…They were dead. My parents…Jona's parents…Jona…was dead. They didn't survive the outbreak.
That's when my adoptive father, Romero Snow, stepped and kneeled in front of me, his mouth moving while reaching out to grab my shoulder. But the something strange happened. Over his shoulder just before he grabbed my shoulder and pulled me in for a hug I could swear I saw Jona appear behind him yelling something.
-End Dream-
That's when I jolt awake. My hair falling in my face as I bolt up and breathe deeply while looking at my hands, trying to calm myself. What the hell was that? Did that actually happen back then? I'm dragged out of my thoughts by a hand grabbing my other shoulder and shaking me gently. I quickly look up in the direction of the owner, an almost concerned looking Bellamy. I blink at him a moment the images from my dream fading from my mind and into the darkness still around us before I look towards Charlotte.
I breathe out a sigh of relief noticing that she was still asleep, the knife Atom gave her gripped in her hand, and I hadn't woke her up too. I then look back at Bellamy signing a quick "Sorry I woke you up." Even though I knew he wouldn't understand it before looking back down at my hands.
He lets go of my shoulders but he doesn't leave, instead he gently tilts my head up with his fingers on my chin so I was looking at him again. "You can talk to me, Butterfly. I meant it when I said I liked it." He tells me, his face a mix of a serious and the indescribable one, as he takes his hand way. I can just stare at him a moment, his face illuminated by the moonlight from the cave's entrance, my heart pounding in my chest.
Slowly I open my mouth before I quickly shut it when I realize what I was doing and look away, my hands clenching into fists in my lap. I'm so stupid. So…pathetic. I want so badly for those words to be true that I believed for half a second, again, the words of Bellamy Blake. I want so badly for Jona to still be alive that my brain is putting those impossible images into my memories.
That's when I feel Bellamy's hand on my shoulder. I hesitate but slowly I look at him. The second my eyes were back on his face he tells me "I mean it Cooper, I like your voice. So tell me…what did you say?" I blink at him in surprise before averting my eyes as I slowly open my mouth and hesitantly tell him "S-sorry I woke you up." His hand squeezes my shoulder so I snap my attention back to him, finding him with a small smile. He then shakes his head and tells me "Don't apologize, Butterfly. I was already up. Charlotte woke me just a few minutes ago with her own nightmare."
I blink at him, surprised by his response. He seemed…different. Like he cared about someone other than himself or Octavia. But that's when I realized what he said and glance back at Charlotte asking "Is she okay?" before looking back at him for his answer. "She's just fine, Butterfly." He tells me before that slightly concerned look comes over his face as he asks "What about you? What's got you crying in your sleep?"
I quickly look away from him. How could I tell him? How could I talk about something I didn't even understand myself to him? How could I tell someone I barely knew about the worst day of my life? How could I tell someone I barely knew about the strange thing that happened in the memory? How could I tell someone I barely knew about me doubting the people who have done nothing but accept and care about me because of the impossible things my brain was showing me?
He hand squeezes my shoulder again but this time I don't hesitate to look at him. "It doesn't matter. You don't have to tell me, just know that, no matter what, as long as I'm around I'll protect you." "Why would you do that?" I breathe out, my heart pounding in my chest and eyebrows furrowed; confused. "Because Octavia likes you." He says, that small smile coming back on his face, taking his hand off my shoulder before adding "And I like your voice." But then the smile turns into his smirk, amusement sparking in his eyes, as he finishes "I'd like to keep hearing it. Even if it's telling me to go screw myself."
I blink in surprise before I feel a small smile come on my face as I nod and breathe out a small laugh. I understood now. Bellamy's concern was tied to Octavia. Just like how I would have let him drop me into that spike pit because I couldn't let him get dragged down into it because she'd accepted me. It wouldn't stop him from messing with me, that much is true, but he also wouldn't let anything too bad happen to me.
His smirk morphs back into the smile as he tells me "Get some sleep, Butterfly." Before he stands and starts moving back to the other side of the cave. "Thank you, Bellamy." I tell him before my face flares and I quickly turn around, lay back down, and close my eyes, feeling as though my heart would burst out of my chest. Even if it was a mistake, I wanted to believe the words of one Bellamy Blake.