His face was stoic, his mouth pursed into a thin line. He sighed and stood to his feet. "I understand and I do agree. You should be angry. However, the blood pulsing through those veins popping out on your head is bit much of a temptation for me. You may not know my history, but blood is harder to resist for me. I will not be far, but I need some air."
A swoosh of sound and a light wind flipped my hair into my face, and then he was gone. I bit my bottom lip.
"I am so stupid! Of course, he wouldn't calm me for no reason. God dammit." I whispered out, mentally kicking myself.
Forcing myself to take several deep breaths while keeping my eyes closed, I was able to calm my racing heart and anger down. It still simmered but I had to be considerate of Jasper. There was no need to harm this vampire. The one who told me honestly what was happening. The only one being honest.
The more I thought about the last few weeks, the more I realized he was telling the truth. I never had free time anymore. One of the Cullens was always around, asking me to do something with them.
Well, everyone except Rosalie. But I know how much she hates me.
I felt foolish. How had I not seen this? It was so obvious once I realized and thought about it. I couldn't believe how I hadn't figured it out on my own. I really am losing my good judgement in the duty of helping and pleasing others.
Walking out the back door onto the deck of the Cullen house, I searched the trees and forest for any sign of the one vampire who told me the truth. A small flash of red had my heart racing until I remembered he had been wearing a red golf shirt today with his khaki pants.
I spoke at a normal volume, knowing he would be able to hear me even if I whispered. "I am sorry Jasper. I shouldn't have been mad at you. Nor should I have lashed out at you. I'm calm now."
Two seconds later, my hair was whipping around my face again and Jasper was standing next to me, staring out at the forest he just vacated.
"Don't worry about it. I knew you would not like it. But, lying is not right either. Although you are getting better at blocking my abilities."
He leaned forward onto his elbows on the deck's railing. He was as still as a statue and if I had not known better, I would have guessed he had fallen asleep. But I knew, even though his eyes were closed, he had kept track of everything and where everyone was around him.
In fact, as I stood there, watching the forest and Jasper at my side, I realized he never stood where he would have his back to anyone. He was always on the outside of the room and when more people came or went, he would always move to continue maintaining his outside placement. It was strange how I seemed to have noticed this subconsciously but that I only consciously noticed it now. Now that he did have someone at his back. The sheer difference from the norm was what drew my attention to it.
Carefully leaning forward to put my arms on the deck railing as well, without getting a sliver, I asked Jasper a question while keeping my gaze forward – focused on the trees.
"Why do you always stand at the back of a room?"