Yoshizilla: Hello, stupid readers! You'll read anything. Go ahead, click on the back button, skim through this chapter.
Disclaimer: Yoshizilla, you shouldn't say that to the audience who are actually reading this.
Yoshizilla: What do you care?
Disclaimer: Good point. But this is Yoshi Kart.
Yoshizilla: Oh. So should I start over again from the top?
Disclaimer: (sigh) Yes.
Yoshizilla: Okay, then.
(Take 2)
Yoshizilla: (clears throat, and holds up green microphone) Ladies and Gentlemen...it's time I got back to updating my most popular and well-known fanfiction I have ever written...which, of course, is Yoshi Kart, and it also happens to be the biggest Super Smash Brothers story ever written...
Disclaimer: Yoshizilla, for a well renowned author, you gloat too much.
Yoshizilla: Well, it's the truth!
Disclaimer: And this seems more like a OVERLOADED crossover-
Yoshizilla: Hey buddy, guess what? Most of the characters who have major roles happen to BE part of the Super Smash Brothers, or are at least related to the characters/stages/items that are in it. Second of all, it's best described as Super Smash Brothers because Yoshi and Master Hand REPRESENT Super Smash Brothers, as do Peppy Ankylosaurus and Dr. Hoshi (who are the only fan-characters that have more appearances in Super Smash Brothers stories than any other fan characters in the history of Super Smash Brothers fandom). Third of all, the-
Disclaimer: (moans and holds ice block on head for no apparant reason) All right, all right, I get it. Sheesh.
Yoshizilla: (grins and chuckles) Thank you. And yes, ladies and gentlemen - I have done the scoreboard prior to this chapter, so in concluding this wonderful race, I'll have the racers finish in the positions that were assigned to them in the scorings. So, I hope you all enjoy, videogame, fanfic, and racing fans, cause here...we...GOOOOOOOO!!!!!
"My, oh my, it's been one heck of a crazy race!" Exclaims a highly fueled-up Master Hand as he announces with high enthusiasm, "The racers are coming close to the finish line, but who's going to win, I'm not so sure of!"
"Well," Taj breaks in, "I believe that Diddy Kong might have a chance. After all, he IS the one who has his name in the title of an awesome N64 racing game."
"...That got translated into a crappier DS version..." Master Hand angrily muttered, which ticked off Taj. Master Hand cleared his throat. "Anyway, here are the people in first place! It looks like Petey Piranha and King Boo are doing their best to catch up, but Ganondorf/Wario and the Star Fox crew aren't thinking so!"
"Or are they so sure of themselves?" Taj asked, smirking and pointing at the huge projectile screen showing the Ankylosaurus Desert race. "Look!"
Master Hand looked up, and to his surprise, Brock and Hikari (who made a surprising comeback) are zooming at full speed towards Petey Piranha and King Boo.
"Well kiss my grits!" Master Hand exclaimed in surprise, "Brock and Hikari are gaining on Petey Piranha and King Boo! But can they still have enough faith to actually win? Find out, ladies and gentlemen!"
Brock and Hikari were zooming towards Petey Piranha and King Boo. Hikari threw a mushroom into the engine, and the car started going faster. Sooner, the two Pokemon Trainers were right behind Petey/King Boo.
Petey turned around and spewed brown goop at Brock, making him blind and turn the car towards the cactus plants. King Boo laughed as he turned to the left and threw a Chain Chomp at Ganondorf and Wario. Wario punched the Chain Chomp away, and he then taunted King Boo and Petey, wagging his butt at them. Petey then grabbed a Bowser Shell and hurled it at Ganondorf and Wario, causing them to crash into the quicksand and slowly sink. As Ganondorf and Wario tried to get out the quicksand by pushing the Gerudo King, Petey took out a red shell and fired it at the two, causing them to fall into the quicksand, too.
Up ahead was the Star Fox. Fox McCloud, Falco Lombardi, and Krystal got into their arwings and started attacking, but alas, Bowser, Mewtwo, and Donkey Kong proved to be a match for them. Bowser fired a bullet bill at Fox, which caused himt to jump back into the Star Fox as he watched, sadly, his arwing crash down into the rough, desert sand. Krystal managed to fire a few shots at the Koopa Klown Car, causing it to malfunction and slowing it down. But she was then knocked down to the rough sand by Mewtwo, who fired mini Shadow Balls at her arwing. Falco Lombardi didn't even had a chance, as he was easily grabbed by Donkey Kong and hurled into Fox, knocking both characters unconcious. Falco's arwing, with no pilot, crashed down to the sand, and exploded.
Petey and King Boo easily passed through the huge debris, and they used a Golden Mushroom to progress further. Bowser fired a Bowser Shell at them, which they easily avoided by swerving to the right. Mewtwo used his Disable ability, and paralyzed the Piranha Pipes, stopping Petey and King Boo in their tracks. As the Koopa Klown Car propelled forward, Donkey Kong threw a Giant Banana behind it, landing smoothly down on the path.
King Boo tried to turn the steering whell, but he had no luck. Petey frantically searched for a mushroom, but all he got were bombs, mines, bubbles, and green shells. As the pair tried to fix their vehicle, Brock and Hikari passed them by surprise. Hikari stuck out her tongue at Petey/King Boo and waved at them as she tossed a triple pack of mushrooms into the car, sending Brock's car even further to catch up with Bowser, mewtwo, and DOnkey Kong.
Petey growled, and he grabbed a lighting bolt, which struck the rough sand and destroyed the Disable ability, allowing Petey and King Boo to get back on track. petey threw a mushroom into the tank, and the Piranha Plants went back into action. Making a right turn and two powerslides on the straight path ahead, Petey and King Boo were smoothly on Brock/Hikari's tail.
Hikari turned around. "Uh oh! The double trouble's back!" She alerted.
Brock growled. "All right, throw a mine at them!' He suggested as he made a sharp turn on the right curve, and a mini-turbo on the left, smaller curve.
Hikari grabbed a mine and threw it down on the path. Petey grabbed the mine and threw it in front of Brock's car - which caused Brock and Hikari to colide into it. King Boo and Petey both laughed as they switched places and King Boo turned the Piranha Pipes invisible. Brock and Hikari switched places, and Brock threw a mushroom into the engine, sending the vehicle forward.
Hikari sweatdropped, screaming as she wildly steered the steering wheel. "B-Brock! I don't think I ever drove a car before!"
"Just think it's like ridin' a bicycle!" Brock screamed, hanging as tight onto the railings as possible. "You'll get used to it!"
Baby Mario and Baby Luigi (in their red-colored Baby Wagon) were both coming down fast the smooth, sand-paved road, fighting off Paulie Pretztail and Fergy Fudgehog (in their rainbow-colored Pinata Kart). The desert winds started to blow hard, too, making the road too gusty to see and navigate.
"Ram him off, Baby Mario!" Baby Luigi piped, taking out a green Koopa shell and throwing it at the rainbow-colored Pinata Kart, tilting it over. He laughed and fired another green shell.
Paulie took out a tennis racket, and switched positions with Fergy, whacking the green shell at the red-colored Baby Wagon. The Baby Wagon was also tilted, but it got up faster than the Pinata Kart. Paulie growled. "Deal with this, you teeth-rotting babies!" He took out some pieces of candy, threw them into the air, and started whacking them at the baby Mario Brothers with his tennis racket.
Baby Mario placed a blue shield around the Baby Wagon, so the candy fell into the ground, not damaging the Baby Wagon in anyway. Baby Luigi took out a bo-bomb, and threw it infront of the Pinata Kart.
Fergy screamed, and he swerved into the left, avoiding the bo-bomb (which exploded a few seconds later), but ramming into Baby Mario and Baby Luigi.
Baby Mario growled. "So, you loike that, eh?" He took out his red minature hammer and started whacking it at the Pinata Kart, causing some dents and fracturing some bolts.
Paulie whacked his tennis racket at the right side of the Baby Wagon, causing one fo the wheels to pop off. The Baby Wagon started screeching on the desert road, leaving its mark behind.
Baby Luigi took his green minature hammer and SLAMMED it down on the front of the Pinata Kart, causing the engine to EXPLODE, and making gas spew out everywhere. In short terms, it made Paulie, Fergy, Baby Mario, and Baby Luigi ALL covered in oil.
"Now look what you done!" Fergy cried out angrily at Baby Luigi, "We're covered...in OIL!" He started to cry. "Great! Now my candy will smell and probably taste like white out!"
"Awww shut up!" Baby Luigi said, rolling his eyes and whacking Fergy in the head with his green mallet, knocking the green-colored Fudgehog out.
Paulie gasped. "FERGY!" He growled and pointed at Baby Mario and Baby Luigi. "You two babies are gonna regret doing that to my best friend!" He grabbed Fergy, placed him gently under the railings, shut the railings shut (halfway to Fergy's stomach), and got into the driving seat, making a mini-turbo as he turned left (Baby Mario and Baby Luigi also made a mini-turbo turning left). Paulie then slammed on the breaks, allowed Baby Mario and Baby Luigi to pass, and slammed on the pedal, sending the Pinata Kart ZOOMING right up to the Baby Wagon, slamming into the back.
Baby Luigi screamed. "Gah! Baby Mario, he's-AHHHHHHH!!" Paulie rammed the Pinata Kart into the Baby Wagon aagain. "-That red Pinata thing is rammin' into our wagon!"
Baby Mario growled, taking out several red fireballs. "The heck he would. Keep driving, baby Luigi!" He aimed carefully at Paulie.
Both Baby Luigi and Paulie made two powerslides on the two left-and-right curves, but by the time they reached the 3rd left turn, Baby Mario threw the fireballs at Paulie, setting the rainbow-colred Pinata Kart on fire.
"Haha! Take-a that!" Baby Mario cackled, giving Baby Luigi a high-five and switching positions.
Paulie screamed, but he was determined to beat the two baby Mario Brothers. He took out a mushroom and threw it into the engine tank, sending the Pinata Kart propelling more. He once again rammed into the red-colored Baby Wagon.
Baby Luigi started crying, holding down his green hat. "Waha! Baby Mario, we're in trouble!" He was slapped by Baby Mario.
"You idiot of a brother!" Baby Mario snapped, handing Baby Luigi a blue, orange-stripped Klaptrap, "Don't just stand there! DO SOMETHING!"
Baby Luigi looked at the blye, orange-stripped Klaptrap, and he gave Baby Mario a thumbs up sign. "Gotcha!" He turned around to face Paulie Pretztail, and threw the Klaptrap at the Pinata Kart.
The blue, orange-stripped Klaptrap started biting at the Pinata Kart, but was easily knocked off as soon as the Pinana Kart made the mini-turbo on the right curve, following the same path as the Baby Wagon.
Paulie smirked. "Heh. You're not gonna make a monkey out of me-" Before he could finish, the Yoshi Series and DIddy Kong Racing bosses pushed him into the rough sand, and did the same with baby mario and baby Luigi.
"What the?!" Baby Mario exclaimed, screaming as he and Baby Luigi were hurled into the air by the bosses, and landed head-first into the rough sand, with the Baby Wagon landing a few feet away from them.
Paulie moaned, his unconcious friend Fergy and the incredibly damaged Pinata Kart a few feet away from the red, yellow-striped Pretztail.
Heppy Ankylosaurus, Shelia the Stegosaurus, Bronto the Brontosaurus, and Boggy the Polar Bear are all racing each other to get past the sky-rising pyramid. Bronto rams his heavy blue kart into Boggy, causing the Polar Bear to spin around and crash into the pyramid wall. Heppy takes out a green Koopa shell and fires it at Shelia, who swerves to the right and easily avoids it. Shelia spills oil behind her, which Heppy slips on and spins around. Bronto comes up from behind and rams into the back of Shelia's stable yellow kart. Shelia whacks her spiky tail at the front of Bronto's kart, knocking the hood off and causing the oil the spew over both Bronto and Shelia.
Heppy uses a mushroom, and he zooms past Bronto and Shelia, and into the pyramid. There, he is attacked by several Dry Bones, who throw their bones at Heppy's light purple kart. Bronto comes thrusting in, piling up several knocked-down Dry Bones and swerves to the right, making amini-turbo on the right down spiral. Shelia uses her hookshot, and attaches it to Heppy, who throws a mine in Shelia's path. Shelia hits the mine, and her kart temporarily stops, but it is dragged by Heppy as the hookshot is still there. Making two left turns on the left downspiral, the three Yoshi Kart racers come into an ancient treasure tomb, where Bronto manages to grab a few coins (how greedy of him). The entrance to the treasure doom closes, and lava starts to flow down the walls. Using the power of mushrooms, Shelia, Heppy, and Bronto all manage to make it out of the tomb alive and go upwards, only to face more Dry Bones. Heppy places a green shield around his kart, while Bronto rams into the Dry Bones and Shelia whacks them with h8er spiky tail. All of them making a powerslide on the sharp right curve, they go downwards once more and make a left turn, exitting the pyramid and making it back into the desert, zooming through the rough sand.
"Gee, this desert is something, huh?" Shelia asked Bronto and Heppy, laughing as she felt the wind in their direction.
Bronto nodded, laughing as well while swerving to the right with Heppy, avoiding a few jagged rocks. "It sure is. Hey, you think we'd be able to catch up to King DeDeDe and Escargoon?"
Heppy got a smirk on his face. "Let's try!" He shouted, and all three dinosaurs slammed their foot son their karts' pedals and went zooming down the gusty desert path, seeing King DeDeDe and Escargoon ahead with Captain Falcon in front of them.
Mario/Luigi, Diddy Kong, Ash/Max, and Peppy/Clario are all speeding down the hazardrous desert, trying to overcome each other obviously.
"Fire the green fireballs!" Mario shouted, steering the Red Fire.
Luigi turned around, and he hung onto the railings with his right hand. He held up his left arm, the green fireballs forming in his hand, and he aimed carefully at Peppy/Clario. He threw the fireballs at the incoming pair, causing the Turbo peppy to spin around and burn. "Oh yeah!"
"Hot hot HOT!" Peppy cried, getting out a bucket of water and pouring it down on the Turbo Peppy. He growled and switched positions with Clario. "I'll show you how it feels!" He started churning up electricity, but the electicity zapped him and Clario (since the water was all over the kart). Both Peppy and Clario remained motionless, their kart paralyzed and stained black.
Max threw a mushroom into the engine tank, and Ash swerved to the right, appearing next to Mario and Luigi. Both of the two pairs made powerslides on the left turn, and started to push each other while making another powerslide on the continous left ridge. Max punched at Luigi, but Luigi whacked Ash's dasher with his hammer, causing a dent in it, and sending Ash/Max spinning around. Luigi then threw a bo-bomb at the pair, and watched both of the boys go up, and fall down, the dasher landing on both of them. "Ha!"
"Hang on, Luigi!" Mario shouted, as he started doing a powerslide on the turbo ramps, which boosted the Red Fire's speed.
Diddy Kong simply used a roccket booster, and he simply turned left as he tried to catch up with Mario and Luigi. He then grabbed a rocket missile and threw it at the Mario Brothers, which collided with them. He laughed and stuck out his tongue. "Suckers!" He then crashed into a tall Pokey, not noticing it.
Mario and Luigi laaughed, and Luigi threw in a triple pack of mushrooms into the engine, propelling the Red Fire to pass the Pokey and zoom off the ridge.
Diddy Kong whacked the Pokey into several pieces by whipping his tail, and he slammed his left foot on the pedal, sending the kart propelling after the Red Fire.
Mario switched places with Luigi, and he threw a green Koopa shell at Diddy. Diddy grabbed the green Koopa shell, and threw it back. Mario whacked the green shell back at Diddy with his hammer. Diddy whacked the shell back at Mario with his flexible tail. The two characters continued whacking the shell at each other.
Peppy and Clario both started to push the Turbo Peppy, and as it started moving, CLario attached a rocket booster, and he relased it, which sent the Turbo peppy zooming. Peppy made a mini-turbo on the left ridge, and continued making mini-turbos through the left ridge, although he didn't go on the turbo ramps. Ash and Max followed suit by switching positions with each other each time they threw a mushroom into the engine, gaining on Peppy and Clario. But unfortunately, Clario threw his yellow fireballs at Ash and Max, burning the pair, and slightly delaying them from catching up. Ash started the engine again, and the dasher was up and running, but it would be a while before he and Max would catch up to Peppy and Clario again.
"Peppy and Clario are catching up to Mario/Luigi and Diddy Kong, who are fighting with each other!" Master Hand announces, "Ash and Max are catching up pretty quick. They're all making mini-turbos through the various left and right turns. Diddy Kong has been hit by the green shell, and Peppy/Clario manage to pass him. Here comes Ash and Max. Max just fired a banana peel ahead of Diddy Kong, and Diddy's car slips on it, making it spin around and lose more momentum. Meanwhile, the bosses manage to get in the lead, but with Bowser/Mewtwo/Donkey Kong, Ganondorf/Wario (part of Bowser's team, BTW), and Petey Piranha and King Boo's sight on first, it'll seem like a long time before he see any winners."
"Don't be too sure of yourself, Master Hand," Taj adds, also announcing, "Brock and Hikari both have a chance, even though they're now farther away from the leaders. Anyways, it looks like Waluigi's group is having trouble with the Chaotix and Humba Wumba's group. Wait, it seems as if the Jinjo in Humba's party fired a bomb and plunged Waluigi's entire group into flames! But Charmy manages to get several shots at Humba's group, slowing them down. Wait, what's this? Boshi and Krunch the Kremling BOTH pass the Chaotix, and are fighting to get first place. But it seems as if they just got blown overboard by the CHaotix, who their leader, Vector, played loud music through their radio and caused shockwaves which caused Boshi and Krunch to spin around...wait, what's this? BARNEY THE DINOSAUR just past by the Chaotix, singing his annoying songs!"
Everyone moaned as they could hear one of Barney's stupid songs playing through the giant loudspeakers.
"It seems as if the Chaotix stopped and covered their ears! This gives Boshi and Bronto both a chance to pass them. Oh, but look! Barney has just been plunged into the air by the gusty, desert winds...and at the same time, both Boshi and Krunch place blue shields around them, blocking the winds! Oh, the excitement, the thrill of this race, eh Master Hand?" He started laughing heartily.
"It certainly is, Taj!" Master Hand agreed, also laughing heartily, "And speaking of which, it seems my lovable, oafish brother, Crazy hand, grabbed Boshi and Krunch and hurled the two characters back into the desert winds, causing them to be sent flying! But now they both transformed their karts into planes, giving them an edge! Crazy hand is now plowing through, but Wizpig has other plans. He's coming up from behind and-HEY, he smashed Crazy hand into the quicksand!" He yelled angrily, "What kind of cheap shot is that son of a bi-"
"Whoa, calm yourself, Master Hand," Taj said, trying to calm Master Hand down in his surprisingly soothe voice, "Wizpig will probably get his. Anyway, here comes the Simpsons. I wonder what will happen?" A few seconds later, the Simpsons are hurled into the green cactuses on the left side of the desert racecourse by Wizpig, who starts to run off again. "And Wizpig just hurled the Simpsons into the cactuses..."
"Told you they'd be a problem, those cactuses," Master Hand hinted, nudging Taj on his shoulder, "Anyway, Blaze the Cat and the Babylon Hunters - Jet the Hawk, Wave the Swallow, and Storm the Albatross- are fighting each other, but only Storm seems to be having trouble. Maybe because he's so fat- AND BLAZE JUST SET WAVE AFLARE, CAUSING HER TO FALL DOWN ONTO THE DESERT PATH! That just leaves Jet to save his group from losing..."
"You won't pass me!" Blaze snarls, firing small purple fireballs at Jet.
Jet manages to avoid them, jumping up into the air. "Nice try, but I'm not going to lose to a feline!" He kicked her in the stomach, pinning her down into the desert path. "That's for my friends, Wave and Storm!" He continued off, navigating through the desert on his hoverboard, when he was blasted by ice eggs.
"Good firing, Kazooie!" Banjo exclaimed happily, driving past a frozen solid Jet.
Kazooie chuckled, blowing her wings as if it was a gun. "No problem, Banjo. It was too easy."
Banjo chuckled, making a left turn on the upcoming stretch, when he noticed a spiny shell. The spiny shell sent him and Kazooie into the air, and both landed back down. Blaze cackled, passing by the bear and bird.
"Get her!" Kazooie shouted, slapping Banjo in the back of the head, "We can't lose to her!"
Banjo nodded. "Right!" He got back in the car, and threw a mushroom into the engine, sending the car blasting down the desert path. Making a sharp right turn, Banjo and Kazooie caught up to Blaze the Cat.
Blaze smirked, using her telekic powers to float in the air. "Peh! You think you two are going to get past me, huh?" She used her telekic poowers to summon rocks from the sand, and threw them at banjo's car, which started to take in bumps.
Banjo gasped in horror. "My car!" He growled, taking out a honeycomb, You'll pay!" He put the honeycomb into the engine, which recovered the car instantly.
Blaze gasped, and she growled. "Nifty trick, honeybear, but THIS won't help you recover your car!" She started firing small purple fireballs at the tires of Banjo's car.
Kazooie pressed a button, and the car turned into a plane. "Didn't expect thus, huh Psychic girl?" Kazooie teased, firing a Clockwork Kazooie egg down at Blaze, which exploded and sent the cat rolling unconcious on the rough sand.
Jet blasted by on his hoverboard, catching up to Banjo and Kazooie, and looking at the unconcious Blaze, smirking and shaking his head. He gave his focus back to the road, and jumped off his hoerboard briefly over a set of jagged rocks as he landed back down on it and continued pursuing Banjo and Kazooie, who were in the air, easily taking down several racers - Bumper and Spongebob/Patrick, for example - who were trying to get passed the difficult turns.
"Jet the Hawk is catching up to Banjo and Kazooie, but it seems as if the bear and bird duo will have more plans up their sleeves," Master Hand announces, "What other characters should we look upon?"
Taj thought for amoment. "Hmm...well, you know, we haven't gotten word on Sonic the Hedgehog, Amy Rose, or Shadow the Hedgehog for quite some time...how about them?"
Master Hand snapped himself (XD). "An excellent idea, Taj! We'll be able to get more coverage on the race than usual, and plus, everyone wants to see the world's fastest thing alive manage to cope in the desert, no?" He turned to the Lakitus. "Cut to Sonic, Amy, and Shadow!"
The Lakitus nodded and saluted, floating off into the air to get coverage on behalf of the audience watching the action-filled Ankylosaurus Desert race.
"Phew," Sonic the Hedgehog gasped, wiping his forehead with a napkin from Amy as he drove, "It's hot as hell out here!" He served past two cacti that popped up in the middle of the road.
Skinner and Otto were coming right behind Sonic, Amy, and Shadow, with Cloud and Sephiroth fighting behind them.
"Otto, prepare to run over the hedgehogs," Skinner instructed, looking at Sonic/Amy/Shadow with a pair of binoculars.
"You got it, Mr Skinner!" Otto punched the gas and started heading towards the hedgehog trio.
Skinner took out a bazooka, aiming it at Shadow's head. "Hasta luego, 'ultimate lifeform'," SKinner chuckled, firing a missile out at Shadow.
"Hey look," Sonic pointed, "That cactus looks like Elvis!" He drove over to the said cactus, out of Otto's range.
"AGH! Quit flicking your hair at me you silver haired bastard!" Cloud shouted at Sephiroth, pointing his sword threateningly.
Sephiroth huffed. "Oh please! I'm better than you!" He kicked Cloud's motorcycle, zooming faster on his own motorcycle.
Haru Glory made a mini-turbo on the left turn, but he didn't realize that coming from behind him were Sonic/Amy/Shadow. However, he slipped on a banana peel left by...
"Good one, Boots!" Dora exclaimed, going down the two ramps without using any mushrooms.
Boots rubbed the back of his head, smiling. "Awww shucks. You want to se something, take a look at this!" He took off one of his red boots, and threw them at Haru Glory, knocking him on the head.
The missile Skinner fired at Shadow instead hit Haru Glory, which blew him up and sent the poor Rave Master into the spiny cactus patches.
"YEEEOOOUUUCHHH!!!" Haru Glory screamed, running around like a moron with the cactus needles sticking in his butt.
Several of the Lakitus snickered as they recorded Haru Glory making an embarrassing idiot out of himself.
Haru Glory continued running around, screaming before Otto accidentaly ran him over.
Skinner sighed. "Well, at least we managed to run SOMEONE over..." He and Otto then screamed as the bus spun around on another banana peel.
"LOOK OUT BELOW!!" Cloud's motorcycle suddenly landed right on top of them
Sephiroth was now seen holding a Super Scope, firing blasts at Cloud at kept damaging his motorcycle. Sephiroth then charged a big shot, and fired it right at Cloud's head.
Cloud ducked over the blast and shot back withe a fire spell, hitting Sephiroth's hair and setting it ablaze.
Sephiroth screamed like a girl. "EEEEEIII!!! My beautiful, perfect hair!" He tried to put it out, and the flare sizzled, ruining Sephiroth's once beautiful white hair. He growled, and pointed at Cloud. "YOU! YOU WILL PAY FOR RUINING MY HAIR!!"
Cloud laughed at Sephiroth. "Let's see the fangirls fuss over you now! Maybe I'll get put in some straight couplings for once! HEHEEEEEEEE!!" He pushed on the throttle and zoomed off, trailing Sonic/Amy/Shadow down the cacti shortcut.
Dora and Botts both dropped several more banana peels behind them as they made mini turbos on right and left curves. On the 3rd left curve, Boots threw back a bo-bomb, which exploded when Skinner and Otto came into contact...
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO(OMG look at all these letters that are stupidly and annoyingly and yet somewhat hilariously increasing the damn word count over NINE THOUSAAAAAAAAAAND for no apparant reason!!! LOL)OOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"AHHHH!!!" Skinner screamed, holding onto Otto as they both landed in quicksand, the parts of the buses coming down on them.
"Looks like Sonic/Amy/Shadow found quite the good shortcut," Master Hand announces, looking at the scene through the projectile screen at the finish line, "It also seems that Cloud has discovered this, too. Although Dora and Boots are the only ones on the main ro-wait, here comes Sora now."
Sora started coming up behind Dora and Boots, his Keyblade drawn in his left hand. "This should be a piece of cake..." He said to himself, smirking with confidence.
Unbeknowist to Sora, he started spinning around on his motorcycle after slipping on one of the badly placed banana peels.
"One more banana peel should do it!" Boots said, throwing the last banana peel he had on the road, and looking back proudly at the road, which was covered with banana peels.
"Son of a biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiicycle!!!" Sora sorta cursed, as he span around eratically, but started heading towards Dora and Boots.
Dora switched positions with Boots. She laughed as she watched in delight Sora spinning around and around on the banana peels. "He looks so funny spinning around. I know!" She took off her backpack.
"Dora! What are you DOING!?" The backpack exclaimed, before screaming as Dora threw it at Sora, whacking him in the head.
But that one whack snapped Sora out of his daze. "Wow! Thanks!" He pointed his Keyblade right at Dora/Boots' engine. "Fire!" He cast a fireball straight at the engine.
Dora and Boots didn't know what would happen, but a few seconds later as thet attempted to do a mini-turbo on the left curve...BOOM! They went into the air, blasted by the explosion, allowing Sora to pass with ease.
"I'm outta here!" Sora shouted, as he tossed himself a mushroom and took off down the road, making a mini-turbo on the sharp left curve, and easily avoiding the quicksand pit by swerving to the right.
Coming from behind Sora were other racers, who will be mentioned but not explained - the Final Fantasy 1 gang, BM Jr/Musashi/Milleniumon, Rocky/Anna/Spice, Charture/Amanda/Silver, and the Straw Hat crew.
Sonic, Amy and Shadow, meanwhile, were heading down the shortcut, passing by many more green, yellow, and even orange colored cacti that looked like Elvis for some strange reason.
"Oh Sonic..." A familiar voice boomed out, chuckling evilly.
"Eggman!?" Sonic looked around warily.
Amy gasped, covering her mouth. "But I thought you were with Scratch and Grounder!"
The familair voice continued chuckling, echoing in the desert atmosphere. "Not anymore. I'm no longer Eggman."
Shadow looked confused. "No longer Eggman? What the hell!?" He exclaimed, sweatdropping.
"From now on," a strange purple eggplant with Eggman legs appeared before them, "I am the Egg-PLANT-man!"
Sonic, Amy, and Shadow all gawked in horror and disbelief, screaming like Japanese schoolgirls as well at the disturbing terror that is Eggplantman.
Some of the yellow cactuses turned out to be Pokey, and they started popping up from underneath Sonic/Amy/Shadow, as well as the Eggplantman, which poked him in the butt. Eggplantman yelped in pain and jumped high into the air, allowing Sonic/Amy/Shadow to escape.
Sonic/Amy/Shadow narrowly escaped the lively pokeys and stiffy cacti, and left the Eggplantman -still in utter pain from the needles - in their dust. But would that truly be the last they saw of the Eggplantman?
"More importantly," Amy asked curiously to the anonymous voice in the desert atmosphere, "Wasn't Eggman in the race with Scratch and Grounder?"
Somewhere in the sprawling Ankylosaurus Desert, both Scratch and Grounder were stuck up to their necks in quicksand.
"Scratch, how the hell did we get from 45th place to here?" Grounder asked, trying to get himself out, but with no luck.
Krusty the Clown drove by in his Clown Limosuine, noticed Scratch and Grounder, shrugged, and continued on.
"Don't leave us!" Grounder called out, before sighing. "Crap. So much for us winning, huh Scratch?"
But Scratch's head had already been submerged into the quicksand.
"Uh oh," Grounder said to himself, before he started moving and screamed, "EGGMAN!! ANYBODY!! SOMEBODY!! HEEEELP!!!" Unfrotunately, he, too, as started to submerge into the quicksand.
Meanwhile with Team Rocket in the rough sand...
"Oh man!" James moaned, putting his hands on his head, "We're in the rough sand and we aren't even going ANYWHERE!" He started sobbing. "We're failures as members of Team Rocket!"
Jessie slapped James. "Get over yourself, James. We're still gonna win." She turned to meowth. "Right?"
Meowth nodded, folding his arms. "Right! And luckily..." He chuckled, opening a hatch, with a red button that said 'EMERGENCIES ONLY'. "...I can use this button when we need an extra boost. And this happens to be an emergency, so..." He pressed the button, and the Rocket Car went ZOOMING across the rough sand, causing Jessie, james, and Meowth to hold tightly to the railings as they all screameed.
Taj turned to Master Hand. "Well, those guys seem to be doing we-Master Hand?"
Master Hand was too busy looking over the status of the race, with charts, telephones, and huge piles of cash and coins surrounding him.
"Sorry, I already got that bet. No, Bowser/Mewtwo/Ganondorf/Donkey Kong/Wario have already been betted on, better luck next time. What, do you think Peach's group is gonna win? Peh, not a chance if Chad the Charmander doesn't use his fire attacks of his. You gotta be kiddin' me. Haru Glory won't win the race if it KILLS him. No, Mario and Luigi aren't gay, shut the freak up. No, I am NOT human, can't you see I'm a floating glove? JoebTheGreat's office, Joeb isn't in right now, can you leave a message?" Master Hand said into the different phones, answering them all at the same time, and at a fast pace, too.
Taj sweatdropped, noticing the Gorons (from the Legend of Zelda series, FYI) have placed more phones, charts, and huge piles of cash and coins around Master Hand. "Wha? What the hell is this...?" He said in shock. He sighed and shrugged. "Oh well. If you can't help 'em, join 'em." Taj squished through the telephones, piles of cash and coins, and charts, and he appeared side-to-side with master Hand, also answering telephones at the same time and at a fast rate talking to all of them.
Yoshi/Dr. Hoshi, Koopa/Paratroopa, Pikachu/Marth/Roy, and the Flying Krock were all having difficulties getting through the gusty desert, even though the Flying Krock was able to fly and the other racers have to go by car.
"Pikachu, lighting bolt, please!" Marth shouted, turning left on the curve. Pikachu handed him a lighting bolt, and Marth used it, zapping Yoshi/Dr. Hoshi and Koopa/Paratroopa, which paralyzed them and also shrunk them. "Good job, Pikachu!"
Pikachu rubbed the back of his head, smiling while Roy took out a few green Koopa shells and threw them at yoshi/Dr. Hoshi and Koopa/Paratroopa. Koopa released his own green Koopa shells at the richocheting green shells, gettiung rid of them. Yoshi followed by tossing a Yoshi Egg at Pikachu/Marth/Roy, hitting them. The two pairs of racers returned back to normal, and Koopa/Paratroopa got a boost from the mushroom while Yoshi/Dr. Hoshi got star power. Making mini-turbos on the smooth right curve, Yoshi/Dr. Hoshi ran into Pikachu/marth?Roy, causing the trio to spin around and crash into a towering Pokey.
Paratroopa took out a red Koopa shell, and aimed carefully at Yoshi/Dr. Hoshi. After Koopa made a turn to the left, and swerved to the right to avoid the jagged rocks, Paratroopa fired the red shell, which collided into Yoshi/Dr. Hoshi. Pikachu zapped the Turbo Yoshi, paralyzing it and Yoshi and Dr. Hoshi. Pikachu/Marth?Roy passed, and Roy grabbed the Koopa Kart with a hookshot, pulling it back behind his group. Koopa fired a green Koopa shell at them, which hit, but the Koopa Troopas slipped on leftover oil. Pikachu, Marth, and Roy all zoomed off and left behind mines and bo-bombs, most of which Koopa/Paratroopa and Yoshi/Dr. Hoshi swerved to the sides with ease.
"Ladies and Gentlemen," Master Hand started, asking the entire audience, "The Ankylosaurus Desert race has finally come down to this. Who will win and take home the glory?"
Taj looked over the commentary booth. "It looks like the racers are all pulling in..." He gasped, and several Lakitus with cameras started to hover around the finish line. "It's...it's going to be a photo finish!"
And alas, the Lakitus started to snap their cameras repeatiately as the racers all zoomed/ran/flew through the finish line, causing huge dust clouds to form. The audience started coughing, but they cheered again as the dust disappeared. The racers then all collasped, completely exhausted and devestated from the Ankylosaurus Desert.
"Wowsers," Taj commented, looking down at the completely tired racers, "They sure must have been through heck, huh Master Hand?"
Master Hand nodded in agreement. "You got that right, Taj." He looked at the audience. "Ladies and Gentlemen, all of the racers will return to the Yoshi Kart Hotel, but first, it's stats time!" He then disappeared out of the announcing booth, in a puff of white smoke.
Taj looked around. "Master Hand? What about me?" He sighed and frowned. "Oh well. Guess that's why I have a carpet," He said, hoping on his magic carpet hovering outside the announcing booth and slowly coming down to the scoreboard.