Roach was bored.
Bored out of his mind and anxious on top. It didn't help that he had been stuck in the hospital for the past few weeks. He hadn't been able to leave his room but for a few visits to Ghost's room, which was only a few feet down the hall from his room. When they first arrived, he had multiple daily trips from different doctors, psychologists and psychiatrists since they couldn't make up their mind about what doctor he needed. Any appointments he had with the psychiatrist they eventually settled on with never really delved into the full depth of what had happened. Which Roach was perfectly okay with. He had enough remembering their time during night terrors and flashbacks, thanks.
But one of his main worries was Ghost. He hadn't heard much about his condition other than he survived. He did get to visit him twice, once after Ghost had gotten out of a very long surgery, and a few weeks after that. Roach was pleased to see Ghost manage to squeeze his hand back, excited to see him open his eyes for a split second. Other than that, he hasn't heard anything else. Any other information about him was either information he already knew, or a simple statement that he hadn't woken up yet.
It definitely did not help any of the anxiety he had about the situation. He was the reason Ghost was in such bad shape in the first place. Maybe MacTavish had a reason for him to not be so in the know about anything, but really it was more nerve wracking to not know. Roach had tried to explain his reasoning to MacTavish, but was met with a stern lecture about how Roach needed to focus on his own healing before he could worry about Ghost.
Roach stood up, pacing the room and biting his lip. He wasn't technically restrained to his room, nothing was stopping him from going to visit Ghost, but every time he did Toad or Archer would somehow show up and distract him back into his room. And a recent development made it harder to argue back.
Roach looked up when the door opened, Toad sliding in and closing the door behind him. Roach raised one arm in greeting.
"Hey bug. Long face, huh?" Toad held up a new notebook and set of pens, tossing them onto Roach's bed. "No news yet?" Roach shook his head as he approached the bed, nodding his thanks at the items Toad brought. "Give it time. They had to induce a coma for almost a month. When I woke up from mine it took me a while to be totally aware again. And I was only under for a few days. His memory is going to be trying to catch up again too, so it's gonna be slow." Roach grabbed the notebook, flipping to the first page and unwrapping a pen and writing a quick statement.
It's hard to just sit in this room. Not knowing anything after being stuck in a cramped cell for two months, and whenever we were separated we had to deal with whatever bullshit? I think I have every right to be a little concerned.
"And we aren't discounting that, trust me. MacTavish has a reason for keeping you guys separate." Toad sat in the chair near the window, digging a small book out of his pocket. Roach frowned, writing again.
Babysitting me so I don't try to see Ghost?
"Nah, I just wanted some peace and quiet. Best place to get that right now." Toad smirked. Roach frowned, holding up the notebook and pointing at Ghost's name with a frown. "Ah, too quiet. You're the perfect amount of silence mixed in with being able to interact with their surroundings." Roach's frown deepened as Toad chuckled, opening his book. Roach aimed his pen and threw, hoping it would hit Toad in the head. Toad just managed to move out of the way, smirking as he looked up to Roach's dejected face. "Your aim is shit, try again." The door opened to CIndy walking in, a slight look of disapproval looking towards the two of them.
"Please don't being teasin' my patient." She chastised Toad, smiling to Roach. "How you feeling hun?" She asked. Roach gave a shrug, waving a hand back and forth.
"How are rounds today?" Toad asked as Cindy pulled out a portable oximeter, handing it to Roach to put on.
"Well, no one's coded yet, so so far so good." Cindy smiled, looking down at the oximeter's reading. "And I know you're gonna ask, hun, but I still haven't heard anything about Simon. Oh, sorry, Ghost. I remember you said he didn't like his old name. Old habit." Cindy gave an encouraging pat on Roach's shoulder, holding out her hand for the tool. Roach handed it over, picking up the notebook and opening another pen.
I forget that you were his attending when he was here last.
"Sure was hun, and I wish I could have seen him again under better circumstances." Cindy's smile fell.
"What was he like back then?" Toad asked, lowering his book. "All we know about him before this mess was that he was a hardass." Roach frowned.
He wasn't that bad. He was strict, sure.
"Because you were teacher's pet." Toad pointed out. "He was never too harsh on you." Roach blinked several times before looking away. "And you were fully aware of it, weren't you, you little shit."
"Well, I can't tell y'all how different he is now, but when I first met him?" Cindy sat on the end of Roach's bed, thinking for a moment. "The first few days he was here he didn't talk much. Super cautious, withdrawn."
"So not at all different than now." Toad pointed out.
"Well after he got a bit better he was actually very sweet." Cindy remarked. "Very polite, was even quite the charmer." Toad coughed.
"Charmer? Ghost? You got the wrong guy?"
"I have excellent memory, thank you Eric." Cindy pointedly said. "And you know one version of Simon, and I know another. He's actually very sweet and considerate." She paused for a second. "Let me ask you a question. A few months after he left…" Roach made an aborted attempt to stop her, writing furiously.
He was framed whatevr u saw on the news wasnt rite
Cindy stopped him from writing further. "I get it, hun. I figured it wasn't like that."
"You're talking about what happened when he got home, right?" Toad asked. "Captain gave me the details after we got to you." Roach gave a small nod, remembering the dark look Ghost had before Meat and Toad had left. Cindy watched Roach for a moment before standing up, patting his shoulder reassuringly.
"I'm about to head out on my rounds. Get some rest, hun, you need it." She waved to Toad, walking out and closing the door gently behind her. Toad sighed after a moment, sliding down in his chair before lifting his book again. Roach stared at the door before sitting cross-legged on his bed, picking up the notebook and pen and doodling. He did a sketch of Toad, and after a long while tore out the page and threw it to Toad. Toad caught it, dog earring his book to look at the sketch.
"Oh, shit this is go-oh fuck you." Roach grinned widely as Toad turned the page over, pointing out the phrase I am big dumdum scrawled on the top of the page. "Draw the captain next." Roach's grin grew bigger, opening a new page and starting another sketch. Toad watched him, smiling slightly as Roach fell into concentration. Roach paused, looking up to Toad before looking back down at his sketch, adding a few more lines. "Why did you look up at me?"
Comparison.
"What the fuck comparison between me and the captain? Roach?" Roach pointedly kept looking down, smirk forming slowly as he continued. "Roach you little shit-" Toad got up to look, pausing when the door opened. MacTavish walked in, looking worse for wear as he closed the door behind him.
You look like you just got off the phone with Shepherd.
"Aye, well, I was on the phone with him earlier." Toad stood up and offered his chair, MacTavish waving his hand dismissively. "If I sit down I'm going to fall asleep and Archer'd kill me for not going to the hotel."
"You okay, sir?" Toad asked. Roach nodded his agreement. Wasn't like the captain to be this exhausted.
"Ghost woke up." Immediately Roach surged to his feet, stopping when MacTavish held up his hand. "He was up for a while, but he went back to sleep."
"At least he woke up. How is he?" Toad picked up Roach's discarded notebook, handing it over so Roach could write.
"Memory's not all there right now. He's pretty tired too, so I'd give him a few days before we all visit him."
You think he'll be able to remember everything?
"Brain's more resilient than that, bug. Plus, this is Ghost." MacTavish stifled a laugh as Toad spoke, Roach glancing to him.
"Ghost managed to flip Archer off for calling him 'shy' and already knew he didn't like Shepherd. He'll be alright."
"Ghost and shy do not belong in the same sentence."
That wasn't the everything I was referring to.
"I know. You're thinking about the last three months." MacTavish said solemnly. Roach nodded once. "No one's sure. Honestly I'm okay with him not remembering."
"Why say it like that?" Toad sat down on the bed, patting it until Roach sat down himself. Roach didn't like the expression MacTavish had as he thought.
"You know what happened to him before. And when we got there. Ghost is not one for sentiments. He keeps it professional, never goes into personal stuff." MacTavish paused. Roach nodded in agreement in the silence. "So when he crashed? He called us 'brothers'." Roach raised an eyebrow.
He didn't speak though.
"He was trying." MacTavish spoke softly. Roach looked down at his paper, chewing his lip before writing.
He...apologized to me. Before Sparrow and Taco blasted through the wall. like it was his fault I had a knife to
Roach stopped writing, his hand shaking uncontrollably as tears fell onto the paper. Toad immediately went in to hug Roach, trying his best to comfort him. He leaned into it, trying to stay in the present and not think about the memory flooding through. The helplessness, the inability to stop his body from doing whatever Gonzalo told him, picking up the knife and staring down Ghost, bleeding profusely and coughing with the knife embedded in his chest. Desperately fighting off the commands, he could only watch as Ghost looked up to him, eyes devoid of anything other than guilt as he of all people said sorry. As he closed his eyes ready for-
Roach recoiled at the taste of lemon flooding his mouth, his lips puckering. He blinked for a few moments, confused until Toad held up a small bottle of lemon juice apologetically.
"Sorry, that sucked. But got you out of that flashback fast, didn't it?" he explained, pocketing the bottle.
"That's an old trick." MacTavish pointed out. "Where'd you learn that?"
"Archer. He said personal experience and never went into it." Toad shrugged. "I never bothered to ask."
Maybe something else to get me grounded? That was not pleasant.
"Nah. Fastest result to date with you. The other things we've tried with you didn't work nearly as fast." Toad gave a wide smile. "Plus gotta keep that scurvy away." Roach stared at him, not looking away as he wrote.
Why did I miss you
Toad faked being shocked, hand flying to his chest dramatically. "After all that effort to rescue you, deep in enemy territory!" Roach laughed quietly as MacTavish patted his shoulder.
"I'm headed to the hotel to sleep. Call if you need anything. Toad, don't antagonize Roach any more than usual."
"Yes, sir." Toad saluted sloppily as Roach waved with one hand, flipping him off with the other. When MacTavish left, Toad picked up his book, opening it back up to his previous page. Roach glanced at him before writing his question.
Not gonna leave just yet?
"Nah, figured you'd need some company anyway." Toad shrugged. He glanced towards Roach. "Plus, we all kinda missed you two so I'm getting some peace time with you before everyone bombards you and I can't get you to myself." Roach pretended to be flattered, batting his eyelashes as Toad snorted out a laugh. "Yeah yeah, now let me finish my book."
Thought you wanted some peace time with me?
"This is peace time. Peace and quiet." Roach flipped him off, Toad giving a thumbs up back.
Bitch.
It's...been a stressful month. Didn't really have a clean cut for this chapter either
But a second job to pay for the absurd amount of gas I have to use to get to work every day is much easier for only like three dollars less an hour right next door to my husbands job takes up a good bit of time, so I might miss next months upload idk yet
But let me know how this chapter is, if I need to fix or add anything to it