DISCLAIMER:I do not own "Hawaii Five-O" or any of it's characters. I also do not own nor did I write the lyrics from the song used in this chapter, Katy Perry's "Part of Me".

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

As always, thoughts are in italics. In this chapter, I put the words in bold that Maddie sings. I thought about writing my own lyrics for her to sing, which I will do at times. But other times I'll use songs that are already out there. So, just use your imagination. In this chapter Maddie's singing a couple lines from Katy Perry's "Part of Me". So just imagine it's a song she's writing.

xo

DivaLola

CHAPTER 14

Chin and Malia had heard Steve leave. "What do you think happened?" she asked.

"Maddie's hiding something and it's getting to him," Chin answered.

"I'm gonna check on her," she told him.

"Good idea. Danny and I will find Steve in the morning. He needs time to cool off."

Peaking her head in the door Malia saw Maddie sitting on the floor next to the window. "I take it you saw him leave?" She nodded trying to wipe her tears away. "You've had a crappy night." Malia walked over and sat next to her on the floor.

"Yeah," Maddie said, sniffling.

"You realized you're in love with him didn't you?" She quickly added, "Don't worry, I'll consider the answer covered by doctor-patient confidentiality."

Maddie hesitated, before answering, "Yeah."

"Here, let's watch a funny movie or something. I'll stay with you," Malia stood, reaching for her friend's hand.

"Chin?"

"He's a big boy," Malia laughed. Finally, Maddie took the extended hand and Malia pulled her to her feet. "You guys will figure it out," she assured.

"No, we won't," Maddie said as she climbed in bed.

"What makes you say that?" Malia asked pausing to hear the answer.

Just thinking about it made her feel like the walls were closing in around her. She knew she shouldn't tell her, but she was so tired of keeping everything to herself. "Because we can't. It can't happen for us."

What's that supposed to mean? Malia wondered. She didn't want to push her, so she just let it be. "A mini sleepover!" she said as she got in the other side of the bed.

Maddie softly giggled. "Thanks, Malia."

"No problem!" she patted Maddie's shoulder in comfort. Turning to the TV, "So, what are we gonna watch?" Surfing the channels, she saw there were Three's Company reruns on TV Land. "How about Three's Company?"

Maddie nodded, her eyes feeling heavy. She was still exhausted from the last few months, the emotional night, and the meds Malia had given her earlier, not to mention her concussion. Unable to get comfortable Maddie rose from bed, grabbed her IV bag, and limped to the duffel Steve had left behind. She dug inside until she found a shirt he'd worn. She buried her face in it breathing in his scent as she stumbled back to bed. Standing next to the bed she slipped the other shirt off and pulled this one over her head. Once she was comfortable in bed Malia lightly chuckled.

With Steve's scent surrounding her, Maddie was asleep in minutes. Malia waited fifteen minutes before turning off the TV and heading back to the guest room, figuring she'd stay asleep the rest of the night.

The second he was in his car Steve knew he'd made a mistake. He knew that he should go back and apologize, but his pride was getting in the way. Why doesn't she trust me anymore? he thought as he drove towards his house. He didn't get it. He knew she didn't like telling him when something was wrong because she hated worrying him. However, she'd told him the last time she had a stalker. Thank God she had, too, because it had ended up being someone from her security team. It was why he'd brought Pete on, and why they'd then rebuilt the team with guys they knew and trusted.

Steve pulled up to his house and as he exited his car he realized he was barefoot and that he'd left his bag behind. "Smooth, Steve," he whispered as he went inside, immediately heading upstairs to bed. However, he tossed and turned unable to get Maddie's face from his mind. What if she's hysterical again? he worried. Knowing he wouldn't sleep until he knew she was okay, he reached for his phone. After a few rings Chin's voice came on the line, "You're an ass, did you know that?"

Malia turned to her boyfriend when she realized who he was talking to. "Tell him to come back," she whispered.

Steve sighed. "Yeah, I know."

"Just come back," Chin replied.

"I'm already home in bed. I just couldn't go to sleep until I knew she was okay. Is she okay?"

"What do you think?" Chin angrily said. "McGarrett, swallow your pride and just come back."

"Just tell me, is she okay?" Steve growled, irritated because he knew Chin was right.

"I don't know. Malia went in there after you left. Was in there awhile and now she's back." Chin put his phone on speakerphone.

"Can you ask her?"

"Ask me what?" Malia asked coldly.

Wincing at her tone, Steve gently said, "Hey, Malia... How's Maddie?"

"I left her asleep, but I don't know how long she'll stay that way," she replied, her irritation very apparent. Malia reached over and hit the speakerphone button as she looked at Chin shaking her head.

"She's asleep. That's good," Steve said, relief evident in his voice. "Thanks, Malia."

"Yeah, she took you off speakerphone. Anyway, you've gotta get it together. She's already a mess. Don't be there for her one second and gone the next. Either be there for her completely or not at all. Night, McGarrett." Chin hung up not bothering to wait for a response.

"Yeah, good night," Steve whispered to dead air before dropping his phone on the nightstand. Lying on his back he placed both hands on his head in exasperation. Chin was right. He had to get it together.

Deciding that tomorrow would be different, he closed his eyes.

Nearly two hours after Malia had gone back to the guest room, Maddie jolted awake, sweat covering her body. She'd had another nightmare. She laid on her back hands on her face as she took deep breaths hoping her heart would stop racing and her breathing would normalize. "Pull yourself together, Maddie… things are getting out of control." She knew she had to pretend to be fine, for Steve's sake. He was already worried and upset, and she knew when he found out what she'd been forced to agree to, he'd be even more so.

Knowing she wouldn't be able to go back to sleep, she figured she'd get some work done. She did some of her best work when she was upset. Carefully, she rose from bed and walked to the bathroom where she undressed. Her eyes closed as she smelled Steve's shirt, inhaling his scent. As she removed the shirt her heart ached as sadness washed over her. Clad only in her underwear, she sat on the stone surrounding her huge bathtub. After unwrapping her hand and foot she glanced down at her IV. Malia had put a special seal on it and said she could shower. "She obviously didn't want me pulling it out again," she smirked. She unhooked the now half bag of fluid from the IV, leaving it on her bathroom counter to reattach when she was finished. Maddie climbed in the warm shower immediately hissing at the stinging she felt all over her body. However, she was grateful it wasn't as bad as it had been the day before.

By the time she was dressed and wearing a bit of makeup, it was almost 4:30am. Just as she was headed downstairs she realized she needed to reattach the bag of fluid to her IV. She knew that she needed to take care of herself to help everyone worry less. She would have wrapped her foot and hand, but she wanted to give them a bit of air.

After grabbing one of her favorite sweaters, a large, baggy, grey cable knit boyfriend sweater by Vince, she slipped it on and headed out the sliding glass door off the living room and kitchen. She was grateful no one was awake to see her slow limp. She knew she'd have to walk more normally when everyone was around if she was going to pretend everything was fine. As she exited the door she turned right, passing the pool and outside seating and lounge area. Walking along a stone path she approached what looked to be a large house, completely separate from her main house. She unlocked the thick glass door with the set of keys she'd pulled from a drawer in the kitchen. Stopping just inside the door she closed her eyes, breathing in the scent of her little slice of heaven as it had been months since she'd been home. Walking down the hall lined with her album plaques Maddie eventually turned left into a spacious room. In the middle stood one of her custom Steinway grand pianos. This particular one was six feet long and made of dark east Indian rosewood. As she entered the room she walked out of her slippers. She loved squishing her toes in the plush white carpet, plus, no matter how soft her slippers were, they were killing the cut on her foot. As she sauntered around the beautiful piano, Maddie lightly dragged her fingers along it, eventually ending up on the pristine keys. Pulling out the seriously comfortable and padded matching bench she plopped down and began to play.

She sat there for hours playing and scribbling on a pad of lined music paper, a digital recorder next to her recording everything so she could go back and listen.

Stretching, Pete yawned, his eyes glancing to the right at his alarm clock. 7am, he thought. He was an easy riser, always waking quickly and hopping out of bed. Fifteen minutes later he was showered, dressed and ready to start the day, but not before quickly making his bed. Once a Navy man, always a Navy man.

Before heading downstairs for some coffee, he quietly walked down the hall to check on Maddie and Steve. I really hope they aren't naked, he joked. As he neared the master bedroom he noticed the door was open. "Hmmm." Peering in he saw the bed was made and no one was anywhere in site. "That's weird." He was sure Steve would have tried to keep her asleep as long as possible. Plus, Maddie was never up before him unless she never went to bed.

"Please tell me she slept last night," Pete whispered to himself as he took the stairs to the kitchen. He wandered the bottom floor looking for her. Deciding to check the studio, he walked out the back door. Staring at the studio building he squinted trying to see if there were any lights on inside, but it was hard to tell since it was day. Walking to the studio he hoped that if she was in there she hadn't been there all night. "Yep, she's here," Pete mumbled noticing the door was unlocked. He walked down the hall, following the sound of music. Stopping in the doorway he saw her busily working on a song, lost in her own world. Toeing his shoes off, he walked across the plush, squishy carpet to her.

Although Maddie saw him out of the corner of her eye she said nothing, wanting to finish her train of thought. He'd been working with her long enough to know she needed to finish before interrupting her or she might forget an idea. He listened as she sang and played.

"Throw your sticks and stones

Throw your bombs and your blows,"

Maddie stopped and sang and played the same line again, emphasizing the words differently.

"Throw your sticks and stones

Throw your bombs and your blows,"

She sighed, annoyed, and sang it again differently.

"Throw your sticks and stones

Throw your bombs and your blows,"

Pete could tell she was happy with the outcome as she smiled and immediately grabbed her pencil and began writing the notes on the staff. Stopping, she double-checked the melody by hitting the individual notes on the piano. Once Maddie was sure it was properly written down she hit pause on the recorder and looked at her friend and head of security. "Morning," she smiled.

"How long ya been in here?" he asked, praying the answer wasn't all night.

"A little bit," she exaggerated.

"Hm... let's rephrase. How much sleep did you get?" Pete looked at her, his brown eyes boring into her, his bushy eyebrows raised.

Maddie had decided to not hide so much from Pete. Maybe that would help minimize his worrying over her, which would then hopefully keep him from reporting everything to Steve. "Two hours. I came down around 4:30."

He sighed. "Maddie, you're burnt out. You've got a full day of press and a show on Wednesday. A televised show. And making it harder, the set list isn't the same. You've been required to change it up and add in new material. That means completely new choreography and staged numbers that have to be learned by Wednesday. Not just learned, but they have to be second nature. And from what I understand changes are being made to some of the old choreography and staging for some of the other songs. And the show has to be amazing. If not… who knows what that new asshole head of the label will do. He made it very clear. He was going to give you two months off if you did this. You need those two months." He paused before continuing, "But I have to be honest… I don't know how you're going to pull this off. And let's throw into the mix the fact you have a serious concussion and an injured hand and foot. I mean how are you supposed to dance on that foot? I think the only way you stand a chance of pulling this off and not hurting yourself is if you rest all day and all night. And even then…"

Maddie knew he was right, but his lecture annoyed her. She could do this. She had to do this. "I couldn't sleep, P. I'm sorry that I couldn't, but I thought I'd make use of that time and get started on writing a new song. I have most of the others done. I'll use some of the ones I've written in the last few weeks. It will be fine. I promise. There's no need to worry. My headache is so much better today. It's almost gone. And I don't feel like I was hit by a truck anymore. I promise. I'll be good. The show will be good. And I'll get my two months of uninterrupted, completely work-free vacation time," she told him. However, she was lying about her head being better and about the constant aching in her body.

"Alright." He paused awkwardly, unsure of how to broach the next subject. "By the way... where is Steve?" Pete asked hoping things were good between them.

"Not sure," Maddie answered looking down at her fingers as she played with the piano keys. She was obviously upset, but attempting to hide it. She was trying to act indifferent, like she didn't care, but Pete knew the truth.

Sighing Pete shook his head and rolled his eyes. "Okay... what happened?"

"I don't know. He got upset and left last night," she replied not wanting to go into the specifics.

Damn it, Steve, he cursed. This is your fault she got no rest. He would love to kick his friend's ass right now. Sensing that she wasn't wanting to talk, Pete lightly rubbed her shoulder in silent support. "Well, you know if you want to talk, I'm here."

"Nothing to talk about, but thanks, Petey." No longer staring at her hands on the piano she looked over to him smiling. "You're the best, ya know that? What would I do without you?"

He chuckled, rolling his eyes and shaking his head. "Who knows, Shorty? Sometimes I wonder if you'd be alive. You and your shenanigans..." She giggled as she did put Pete through the ringer, but not so much the last few months. Smiling he said, "How about we get ourselves some breakfast? You hungry?"

No, she thought. The mere idea of food made her want to gag. However, she knew if she didn't eat something they'd just worry about her, so she said, "Yeah. How about in an hour? I'm on a roll here and not quite ready to take a break. Don't want to ruin my flow."

Pete would have preferred getting food into her right then, but he was happy that she had at least agreed to eat. So, he took the win. "Yeah, sure. I'll leave you to it. Holler if you need me. I'll flip the system on."

"Okay, but put me on mute in the house," Maddie told him. "I'm not ready for them to be heard."

"Sure thing, Shorty," he agreed, slipping his shoes back on before walking out.

Now alone, Maddie's back and shoulders slumped forward as her head dropped to her hands. She felt terrible. This was going to be one of the hardest shows she'd ever done.

Pete had doubled back to ask her something, but when he saw her looking so broken and defeated he decided not to bother her. His heart broke for her. She looked like she was being crushed by the weight of the world.

After a few minutes Maddie straightened, un-paused the recorder on the piano and returned to the song she'd been working on. Shaking his head he walked away, his phone already in his hand.

Steve was just leaving Five-O headquarters when his phone rang. Looking at the caller ID, he prepared himself for the lecture he was about to receive. "Hello?" he answered.

"What the hell is wrong with you? I brought her back here so you could help me figure out what's going on, not so you could make it worse!" Pete yelled as he walked back into the house. As he waited for Steve to respond he opened a small closet door in the hall near Maddie's office. Inside was a floor to ceiling rack filled with different electronic equipment. He flipped a few switches and then closed the door and headed to the kitchen where he powered up a TV on the wall. Grabbing the remote sitting nearby he switched to a specific channel. Suddenly Maddie appeared on the screen. She was sitting at the piano in her studio. He immediately hit the mute button. This was how he could keep an eye on her without being in her way.

"I screwed up. I'm sorry," Steve mumbled.

"You have no idea what you've done," Pete told him as he sighed. "Where are you? Come fix this."

"I was just heading over. I couldn't sleep last night, so I went to headquarters. Been working on trying to get something from the text message. Is something wrong?" Looking at his watch he said, "I mean she's asleep, right? She doesn't get up early on days she's not working."

Pete wasn't looking forward to telling him about the show. "Did you get anything from the phone? Figure out who sent the text message?"

"No. Still working on it. There wasn't much I could do with the phone itself until I called in our tech. I didn't want to do that in the middle of the night. Bad enough I'm calling him in on his day off. Anyway, he pulled what he needed from the phone and gave it back to me. I'm sure Mads wants it back... But, I did call Los Angeles. Winston Graves is accounted for. There's no way this is him. I was kind of hoping it was. It would make things easier. I mean, Graves is still completely obsessed with Maddie, but he's locked up. They sent me over the prison records and no one has visited him. When he stalked her 4.5 years ago, he was so in love with her that he didn't want to share her. He wouldn't send someone else to watch her. He's too jealous. I don't think this is him, which means it's someone we don't know."

"How much longer does Graves have on his sentence?" Pete wondered, curious.

"About a year, but he's been a model prisoner. He has a parole hearing in 3 months. Looks like he'll most likely be granted early parole at that time."

"Great," Pete said sarcastically.

"I know," Steve mumbled hating the idea he'd be out soon. "What did you mean when you said I have no idea what I've done?" he asked walking across the Five-O parking lot and opening his truck door.

"Maddie's awake. She needed the rest last night, McG." Pete was stalling.

" Well, when I talked to Chin last night she was asleep. So, she got some right?" Steve hoped.

"Two hours." He took a breath before relaying the bad news. "But because her last couple weeks of shows weren't as great as they should have been the label wanted her to do a show here the other night."

"What?" Steve asked.

"But, Maddie talked to them and was able to come to a compromise."

Steve closed his eyes as he sat in his truck. "What kind of compromise?"

"She has a show Wednesday."

Fuck, he thought, digesting the news. "I guess she at least has a few days until then," he finally said.

"The new head of the label... well, he insisted there be at least 4 new songs in the set," Pete said.

"Which means new choreography and staging," Steve interrupted. He knew what went into her tours. It was hard work. "Damn."

"Yeah, and he insisted there be changes to the current show since this one will be televised."

"There's no way she can pull this off," Steve said. Although he sounded calm, he was anything but.

"I know, McG. She's exhausted."

"Where is she now?" he asked as he started his truck.

"She's been in her studio for hours."

"I'm on my way. I'll be there in ten," Steve told him.

"Okay. Fix this," Pete emphasized.

"I will," he snapped before hanging up. He tossed his phone in the cup holder in frustration before pulling out of his parking spot.