Trying my hand at a different space! Recently have fallen in love with TSITP series (books and series alike) all thanks to one of my best friends. I have fallen in the rabbit hole of so desperately waiting for Season 3 and needing some type of finality for the characters. so, this is my take on primarily the books with some of the show's best moments sprinkled in. The story is in Belly's POV unless otherwise stated!

Disclaimer: The wonderful Jenny Han of course owns the characters, storyline, and all the rights. This story is just my interpretation and utmost admiration for one of my newly favorite universes.

Prologue

"I thought you knew! I thought you knew! From the moment we kissed on the beach, I thought you knew!" Conrad exclaimed.
"Then why? Why? Why did you throw it all away? Why? I... I th... I thought that we loved each other," I cried.

"We did," he softly said searching my eyes.

"I guess not enough," I muttered stumbling away from him.

I had thought about that night on the beach ever since it happened. Even though I drank most of the tequila that night to cope with the fact Conrad begged Jere for his blessing, I forgot most of that night. But, that moment? Goodness that moment. It will forever be etched in my brain. The hurt in his eyes, and the shock radiating through my body of my words.

I never knew that Conrad Fisher, the first boy I ever slow danced with and the one I always loved, had felt the same way as deeply as I did for him. Sitting on the veranda of my host family here in Spain, I felt so close but still so far from everyone I cared about.

Susannah had been gone for years: 6 feet under now. Jere: was everything until I realized I could never love him the same after the Cabo/Lacie Barone incident. My big brother always loved me and was in my corner, but never fully forgave me for how I messed up our Fantastic 4: Cousins Beach Edition. Mom, my protector: we found our way through our grief of losing Susannah, almost losing Cousins, and her youngest finally growing up.

Then, there was Conrad. Oh, Conrad Fisher, my first love since I was 10. I hadn't spoken to him since the day I walked out on Jere and a future with him. My dreams were constantly of Cousins Beach, and sometimes he found his way into them. The stolen moments we had of just us at the beach house, endless phone calls while he was at Brown, him basically planning my almost wedding to his brother, and so much more.

There was always more to Conrad Fisher. A more that I wanted to explore for years. He wasn't mine, and I wasn't his. Our lives were separate, no longer intertwined. I was in Spain, and he had made it to Stanford. We were worlds apart (literally). Conrad Fisher, I evicted you from my heart years ago. But, you still have squatters rights.

I was lounging in a slowly rusting metal chair, sipping on a glass of sparkling water. Trying to study when you have a gorgeous sunset as your backdrop is much harder than it seems. Someone knocked on the wood post propping my head up.

I knew it was before I ever looked up immediately, my host mother Carmen. "Hola Tia," I said, smiling up at her. She always smelled of roses and the spices she cooked with.

Carmen set her hand on my head and started stroking my much shorter hair. I did a harsh chop of it in my bathroom using the dullest scissors ever right before I moved across the Atlantic. It was the right decision, studying abroad in southern Spain during the Spring meant hot nights and a significantly easier time getting ready for classes in the morning.

She breathed in a heavy sigh as she quit stroking my hair and quietly said, "Tienes una nueva carta querida."

I loved when she called me her darling, her querida. She was like my second mother. Throwing my legs off the arm of the chair, I spun to face her. Nueva carta: a new letter. I thought it was either my Mom or Taylor updating me on what was happening stateside. Looking up at Carmen, I could tell her face was different than normal when she had letters from me. She was more puzzled and read the envelope as if it was in a foreign language.

As she handed me the ivory envelope, Carmen asked in a concerned voice, "Quién es Conrad?"

My breathing hitched at the mention of his voice. "Who is Conrad?" It couldn't be him. At some point in my life, there had to have been some other Conrad who would write to me while in Spain, right? No, Belly. There's never been anyone but him.

I take the letter in my hands as if it is an ancient artifact that could break into a million pieces if handled improperly. Sure enough it was addressed to me "Isabel 'Belly' Conklin", and it was from none other than "Conrad Fisher" of Laurel Grove Apartments at Stanford University.

Carmen looks down at me confused at the fact this is someone I never mentioned to her before. I quickly tell her that he is just a friend from my childhood, but it doesn't seem to satisfy her.

"Amigo o amante? Sólo los amantes o la familia escriben cartas," Carmen says while scoffing and waving her hand at me as she walks away.

She's right: only family members or lovers write letters. Mom is my mother and Taylor is basically my unofficial sister for as long as we have known each other. Years ago I would've said that Conrad was like a brother to me, out of pure denial for the feelings I had for him. After our history though, I wouldn't have dared to say he was my lover but was so much more than family.

He was my history.

Like I said, this is something new! Currently working on more chapters, so let me know what you think! See you soon!