"Come on, Latios," Latias said. "The water race is going to start soon, and I want to watch! It's not every day they do this. In fact, they only do it once a year."

"I know, Latias," Latios replied, and sighed. "Why are you insisting like this?"

"Because I want you to come and watch it!" Latias replied. "Come on, it's the festival! And, unlike most people or even a lot of Pokémon, we can watch the whole thing ourselves!"

She nudged him. "Don't think I won't notice if you start sight-sharing to watch the race!"

"I'd just be sight-sharing to make sure you were okay, Latias," Latios protested, then shook his head. "Fine, fine. Let's see what the race is like this year, then…"

He shrugged, then cloaked himself, and Latias did the same.

"I don't see why you find it interesting to watch, really," he admitted. "The humans and the water-types who tow them are so slow."

They dropped into the water, skimming through the canals of Altomare, and Latias replied telepathically instead of vocally. It's not about the speed, it's about the question of who's going to win! And the skill on display, too.

If you say so, Latios decided. Well, I suppose we'll both watch, and I'll see if it's as exciting as you think. Even if it is mostly just about which human brought along the strongest Pokémon.

That's not all there is to it, it's also to do with cornering and things like that, Latias said, then they both emerged from the water in a small side alley – still invisible, of course. Come on, the start line's this way…

Both dragons flew invisibly around one corner, and then the next, and emerged in front of the competitors.

They're still talking, the timer says it's about a minute to go, we're on time! Latias said, then looked at the competitors. Oh, a corsola, interesting choice, and… huh.

Latias, Latios began, are you seeing what I'm seeing?

What, that halfway along is a weird white and gold Pokémon holding the support rope in its teeth? Latias replied. Yeah, I can see that all right. Do you know what Pokémon that is?

I was hoping you would, Latios admitted. I don't think the humans are expecting this either, they're giving the Pokémon weird looks. Except that girl with a Corsola, she isn't, or, it's a different weird look.

Hey, does this mean we don't have to stay hidden? Latias asked.

Latias, Latios replied sternly, trying not to snort. Just because that Pokémon is out in the open doesn't mean that it's safe for Legendaries to be out in the open. That's why we have to be hidden.

I guess, Latias said, then the starting statue began opening its wings. Look out, here comes the race!

She floated upwards, out of the way of the racers as the race began, then a Pikachu bounced off her head and landed squarely on the back of the white-and-gold Pokémon.

Latias, Latios said warningly.

How could I possibly have known that would- oh, wait, the race is going on without us! Latias interrupted herself. Let's watch!

Several exciting minutes later, Ash swam awkwardly to the nearest landing.

It had been a really fun race, even though he hadn't come first. Or even finished. Totodile had really pulled with all his might, sending Ash (and Pikachu) speeding through the canals of Alto Mare – they'd been jockeying for the lead with Misty and a guy with a Wailmer – but then he'd slipped slightly, not made a turn, and they'd gone shooting off down one of the side paths.

Then they'd tried to get back to the main route, but two turns later they'd ended up in a dead end and trying to turn around had just meant the chariot overbalanced and fell over.

"Sorry," Totodile said, treading water. "I got confused."

"That's okay, Totodile," Ash replied. "You did really well, it's just something for us to watch out for from now on, okay?"

He contemplated the landing itself, then reached up with a hoof. It stuck to the lip, and Ash looked back. "Totodile, give me a boost with Headbutt, okay?"

"Sure!" Totodile agreed, his glum look gone entirely, and gave Ash a shove. It nudged him enough to make his leverage slightly better, and Ash hauled himself the rest of the way out of the water.

"Phew," Ash said. "That was an adventure, wasn't it, Pikachu?"

"Yeah," Pikachu agreed. "I wasn't expecting to fall off, but I swear I bounced halfway down."

"I think you did too," Ash agreed. "Hmm… what do we do with the water chariot?"

He reached down, touching it with his hoof, and picked it up. Then let it drop again, because carrying it was obviously going to be way too hard.

"And which way is it back to where Brock and Misty are?" Ash realized. "I don't think I trust myself to even find the water course, let alone on land…"

There was a whispered argument, too quiet for Ash to catch the details of, and he looked around for where it was coming from. "Huh?"

Then a girl came down the steps to the landing, reached past him, and picked up the water chariot.

"Come on, this way," she said.

"Huh," Ash frowned. "Your voice sounded weird…"

"Her voice sounded like a Pokémon's voice, is what it did," Pikachu replied. "This Pokémon form of yours really does just straight up mean you understand everything, doesn't it, Ash?"

"Your name is Ash?" the girl asked. "Pokémon form? You mean you're not always a Pokémon?"

"No, I'm a Pokémon now and always was, but I only found that out a few weeks ago," Ash explained. "Do you know the way to where my friends are?"

"I know the way to where the race course ended," the girl replied. "My name's Latias."

"Are you just going to reveal everything?" another voice asked, from right overhead, and Ash looked up to see if he could see who'd said anything.

If he really concentrated, he could see a sort of shimmer in the air? There was obviously a Pokémon hiding there, and Ash had sort of an idea of what they looked like.

"We're not supposed to reveal ourselves to humans, to stay safe, and he's clearly not a human," Latias replied. "What's the problem?"

"What's the problem?" the voice repeated. "Just because he's not human doesn't mean we have to reveal ourselves. We don't show ourselves to random Aipom or whatever, Latias."

"It's my decision, and I'm making it," Latias replied. "I'm not showing him the Secret Garden or anything."

Latias was happy to tell Ash a bit about Alto Mare, as a local – she'd been around for a long time – and Ash listened as they walked.

"So, uh…" he said, eventually, as they were going through a quiet bit of the city. "What kind of Pokémon are you? The only Pokémon I can think of that can pretend to be human is a ditto, and they're not very good at it…"

"Latias is my species name, silly," she said. "My brother's Latios. We're psychic types, and dragon types. And I'm actually making an illusion, not really turning into a human… I have to be careful not to bump into things with my wings or not bump into things with bits that I don't have, but carrying something like this I just use my real arms and make my pretend arms line up with it."

"That's pretty cool," Pikachu admitted. "So you're actually a dragon… hey, actually, this sounds like it'd help you out, Ash."

"Huh?" Ash asked.

"You know, if you ever wanted to not make it completely obvious that you were a Pokémon, of a species that none of us even know," Pikachu pointed out. "It would be useful."

"I guess," Ash agreed. "Hey, is that a speedboat coming?"

He stopped, looking back along the canal, and saw that there was indeed a speedboat coming.

"There it is," one of the women on the speedboat said. "That's definitely Latias in disguise. And whatever that Pokémon is, it must be rare. Let's capture them both."

"Run!" Latias said, dropping the water chariot. "Follow me!"

"Wait, I've got Pikachu and Totodile-" Ash protested, then started following her because otherwise he'd be completely lost.

Pikachu blasted the Ariados that came out of the speedboat first with a Thunderbolt, then followed after his trainer, then came back and grabbed Totodile before dragging the Water-type along after his trainer all over again.

After several minutes hurrying through the labyrinth of Alto Mare, with Latias leading Ash and his two Pokémon up stairways, down ramps and though tunnels – fortunately none of them narrow enough to make Ash's ring scrape along the walls – they eventually came to a dead end.

"They can't find us in here," Latias said, and kept walking.

Ash watched in surprise as she passed right through the wall and vanished, then looked at Pikachu and Totodile. "Huh."

"Yeah, I agree," Pikachu said, looking behind them. "I still think I could have beaten their Pokémon…"

Latias stuck her head back out through the illusory wall. "Hurry up!"

Ash shrugged, then followed her, and Pikachu and Totodile did the same.

Inside was a beautiful garden, with trees, bushes, several sloped tiers covered with grass, and a swing set off in the distance. There was water, as well, in pools and fountains, and paths to follow that wouldn't disturb the grass… it looked like a lovely, peaceful place.

"This is the secret garden," Latias explained. "It's where I live!"

"Didn't you mention that before?" Ash asked. "To that other Pokémon?"

A blurry outline in the air came speeding towards them, and stopped right in front of Latias.

"Really?" it asked, the blur moving again, and Ash frowned.

He could almost see what was there…

"Latios, it was important!" Latias protested.

"You specifically said, Latias," Latios replied. "What did you say? You said, I'm not showing them the Secret Garden or anything. And now, here we are, and you've shown them the Secret Garden."

"Hey, don't be cross!" Totodile said, waving his arms. "We were running away from the mean ladies!"

"Mean ladies?" Latios asked. "What mean ladies? Why didn't you tell me about this, Latias?"

"They surprised me, they saw through my illusion!" Latias protested. "I panicked!"

"Oh, that's what you look like!" Ash said. "Wow, is one of you shiny? Or are Latias and Latios different Pokémon who are closely related, like Nidoran and Nidoran?"

"What we look like?" Latias repeated, looking down at herself to make sure she was still in an illusion, then up at her brother to make sure he was still invisible. "Can you see us?"

"I guess so," Ash said, shrugging vaguely. "I can see your disguises too, but it's sort of like they're transparent and I can see both you and them at the same time."

He frowned. "Oh! Maybe Noctowl would know what's going on, she's good at dealing with illusions and stuff so she might know."

"Noctowl?" Latios asked, decloaking because apparently there wasn't much point in being cloaked any more.

"Noctowl's one of our teammates!" Totodile said, and clapped his paws. "Pikachu, look, Latios looks really cool!"

Latias cancelled her illusion, completing the process of revealing to Totodile and Pikachu what the Eon Twins actually looked like. "Teammates?"

"I'm a Pokémon trainer!" Ash explained. "I got turned into this and it turns out that it's what I've always been, but I'm not going to let that stop me from being a trainer! Only, I left all my stuff with my friend, they're probably worried about me and I don't have Dexter or Totodile's Pokéball anyway… can one of you show me the way back to where my friends are?"

"We don't know where your friends are," Latios pointed out, which was quite a good point. "And it's not going to be safe to go out there at the moment if those… mean ladies… were able to see through your illusion. Certainly not anywhere they could actually reach you."

"Hmm," Ash said, raising a hoof and striking it against the ground in thought. "Maybe I could describe what my friends look like? You can fly and be invisible, right?"

"I've got an idea!" Latias realized. "Latios, please help?"

"Latios says this feels silly," Latias reported, a few minutes later.

She was floating in part of the Secret Garden, with Ash, Pikachu and Totodile standing around her… but it looked like they were flying a hundred feet above the rooftops of Alto Mare, as Latias used her sight-sharing ability to pass on exactly what was going on around Latios.

"I think it was a good idea, Latias," Pikachu said. "This is amazing, too… hey, Ash, that looks like it might be them! Over by the cafe place!"

"Yeah, you're right!" Ash agreed. "And don't worry, Latios, you can trust Brock and Misty. They helped me save Celebi! And Misty helped at Shamouti, where I had to get Lugia out of danger, and then they both helped me out somewhere else as well but it's private and I'm not supposed to say where it is. Like how if I talked about you guys I wouldn't say Altomare and definitely not the secret garden."

Latias nodded, passing that on, then giggled.

"Latios says that he's not sure how that works but he'll take it on trust," she said. "But that he's not going to lead them to the Secret Garden himself, he's just going to get Noctowl and your bag."

"That's fair," Ash said. "It'd just be nice to be able to tell them that I'm okay…"

"How lost can Ash get?" Misty said. "I haven't even had a chance to tell him I won!"

"In hindsight, I guess we should have seen this coming," Brock replied, leaning back in his seat. "Maybe Noctowl should have followed him, but she's been working hard and it's good to let her get some sleep at the more normal time for a Noctowl."

"I take your point," Misty admitted. "Still, how much Alto Mare is there for him to get lost in?"

"Pi, pi!" Togepi giggled. "Toge-priiii!"

"Well, it's quite big," Brock said, flicking through the guidebook, then showed Misty the map. "There we go."

Misty wilted. "Yeah, he's going to be lost for days unless Noctowl goes and finds him somehow," she decided. "Or Crobat? Could Crobat look?"

"Probably," Brock said, thinking about it. "Then Crobat could lead him back here, but that might take a while."

"Well, it's not like we've got many options," Misty said.

Then there was a squeaking noise.

"Huh?" Misty asked, looking around. "What was that?"

Another squeak, then Ash's Noctowl sent herself out. Her eyes glowed, and she checked Ash's saddlebags to verify what was in them.

"Noctowl?" Brock asked. "Is something up?"

Noctowl opened her wings in a shrug, then lifted the saddlebags with both her claws and Confusion at the same time. A moment later, she vanished, and Misty frowned.

"Huh," she said. "Well, I guess Ash has got himself into something again. Same old Ash..."

Once reunited with the rest of his Pokémon – and his bag – Ash tapped out a text message to let Brock and Misty know that he was fine, but that it was kind of awkward and he might be a couple of days.

Noctowl also listened to Ash's account of what had happened, said that it sounded like he'd somehow picked up Foresight, then fluttered over to a tree and resumed her interrupted snooze.

"You know, you learned that very quickly," Latias pondered. "Maybe you could learn how to do illusions, like us? That way you could look human and so… well…"

She looked embarrassed. "Okay, it wouldn't have worked with those Pokémon thieves because they could see through the illusion. But most humans wouldn't be able to tell!"

"It'd be helpful, I guess," Ash admitted. "And if I could do it myself it'd be great, but I really want to focus on being able to move things around, so Noctowl doesn't have to work herself too hard."

"Well, we're psychic, so we can help with that," Latias said. "Actually, since I'm psychic and Noctowl isn't, maybe I'd be able to tell if you're doing it wrong or not?"

"That would be great," Ash admitted. "Then, uh… well, I do still need to work on training Phanpy, he's my youngest Pokémon and I want to make sure he's ready for the Pokémon League… so I guess I should work on Confusion while Phanpy trains?"

Phanpy sounded enthusiastic about that, and in fact the slopes of the Secret Garden turned out to work really well for Phanpy learning how to speed up or slow down Rollout. Being able to choose whether or not to get to the top of a slope was just the kind of feedback the Ground-type needed to improve there, and it was a pleasant few hours of training, first Phanpy and then Cyndaquil… even if Ash himself didn't make any progress.

After sunset, though, Ash returned his Pokémon – except Noctowl, who was still snoozing in the trees, and Pikachu who didn't like his Pokéball – then sat himself down on his sleeping bag in his preferred sleeping pose.

It was sort of like folding all his legs up underneath him, which kept his ring just off the ground, and Ash quickly drifted off to sleep.

A few hours later, a noise woke Ash up again.

"Huh?" he asked, groggy, and Latios floated into the air not far away. "What was that?"

The noise came again.

"There's an intruder in the garden!" Latios realized.

"Pikachu, Bayleef – come on, let's see what's going on!" Ash called, then an Ariados went flying overhead.

"Vine Whip!" Ash added, nodding, and Bayleef snagged the Bug-type with her vines. She yanked it down, slamming the Ariados into the ground in what probably qualified as Slam for lack of anything else, then there was a flash up ahead.

"Whirlwind!" Noctowl called.

An Espeon came skidding along the path, looking back in the direction Noctowl's voice had been, and used Psychic.

Then Pikachu used Thunder.

"That's two, who's next?" Bayleef asked, breaking into a canter alongside Ash as they hurried to see what was going on, and they caught sight of the two humans from the speedboat.

One of them raised some kind of weird device, and fired out a net of energy that wrapped around Latios and sent him crashing to the ground.

"Latios!" Latias yelped.

"Bayleef, tie them up!" Ash decided. "Pikachu, get ready to battle their next Pokémon!"

There wasn't a next Pokémon, which was convenient.

Latios reluctantly agreed to let Brock and Misty know where the Secret Garden was, but that got a lot less reluctant when they marched the two humans and their Pokémon off to the nearest police station and said that they'd been trying to capture the Guardians of Altomare.

"They said we couldn't prove anything!" Misty huffed, once they got back. "But then someone brought in a Xatu, and the Xatu took one look at them and I guess they have some kind of code? And the police searched them and found that they're both members of Team Rocket. Some, you know, actually dangerous part."

"Huh," Ash said. "So I guess they can prove something."

"Seems like," Misty confirmed. "So, that's nice… now, what do we do for the rest of our time in Altomare?"

"You could visit the museum?" Latias said. "The man who runs it is a friend, he knows about us, and so does his granddaughter Bianca. That's actually who I was disguised as."

"Depends what the museum is, I think," Brock replied, once Ash had passed that on. "If it's a museum of Pokémon Battling then Ash would be really interested!"

"It's mostly about the history of Altomare, I think," Latias replied. "There's a thing there that's supposed to keep Altomare safe, if it's ever in danger, but it's not had to be used in a really long time…"

After completing their night's sleep, the friends eventually met both Lorenzo and Bianca, and Bianca offered to do a painting of all of them. That included their teams, which was really nice of her, and Ash said so.

Then, after another day of enjoying Altomare, Ash and his friends left to return to new Bark Town before the Pokémon League.

"All right, I admit it," Latios said. "Ash may not be a human, not any more, but he used to be one. And his friends are still humans. And it may not be safe to trust all humans – those ones who tried to kidnap me especially not – but it's no different to Pokémon. Some of them are really nice and some of them aren't."

He shrugged, still invisible, as their boat departed. "I think I'm going to miss them. What about you, Latias?"

Silence.

Latios looked to his side. "Latias?"

Then he reached out with his mind.

She wasn't where he was expecting.

Latias!

I'll be careful, Latias sent back. Besides, Noctowl needs someone to trade off with her on moving things around, and this way I get battle training! You've got to admit, Latios, it was a bit embarrassing that I had no idea how to beat a Poison-type… we should know something that isn't running away and hiding. I think Phanpy could have beaten me.

You could have told me, Latios protested.

I am! Latias replied cheerfully, then tilted her head. Hmm…

"Ash?" she asked. "If a Pokémon has a Pokéball, it means they can't be caught by another one, right? Do you have one?"

"Latias?" Pikachu said. "You're here?"

"Yeah, she's been following us since we said goodbye to Latios," Ash answered. "Oh, yeah, I could see because of Foresight…"

He shrugged. "And, no… maybe I should, though?"

"I agree," Pikachu said. "I don't want you to accidentally catch yourself next time you try throwing a Pokéball."

Omake: The Gospel of Oops, part 1 (non canon)

"Really?" Ash asked. "You're sure, Clefairy?"

"Yeah!" Clefairy agreed, bouncing and flapping his fairy wings to stay in the air. "Yeah! Phanpy's a good friend, and being a trainer's Pokémon sounds like fun!"

"I'm a good friend?" Phanpy repeated, delighted. "I'm a good friend!"

"It sounds like you two will get on great from now on," Ash agreed. "So, you know how a Pokéball works, right?"

"I do!" Clefairy confirmed. "Phanpy made sure I knew."

"I told Cleffa all about them!" Phanpy said proudly. "That was before he evolved though. So Clefairy knows even though I told Cleffa. Evolution is funny."

"It is, and it's amazing to see," Ash said, pleased. "So, when I catch you you're going to go to Professor Oak's lab, he's a Pokémon Professor who studies and takes care of Pokémon. But as soon as I get the chance I'll switch someone else out so you and Phanpy can train together, okay?"

"Sure!" Clefairy told him.

"Can I have a Pokéball, Noctowl?" Ash asked his Flying-type. "I'll throw it myself, though, that's doing it properly!"

Noctowl's eyes glowed, and she levitated a Pokéball out of Ash's new saddlebag before putting it on the ground. Ash made sure it was between him and Clefairy, reached down for it, and vanished.

Then the Pokéball vanished too.

"Ash!?" Pikachu yelped.

"Oh!" Professor Oak said. "Ash has a new Pokémon!"

He picked up the new arrival from the PTS, opened it, and Ash came out.

"Oh, so that's what happened," he said. "Hi, Professor, I think I just realized something."

"I think I just realized something," Professor Oak admitted. "Silly of me but I never realized that."

"Now I need to get back to Pikachu and the others!" Ash added. "I don't want to leave Clefairy waiting too long…"

AN:

Yep, they don't know what Ash is either.

The Gospel of Oops is where I will put non-canonical material, basically. In the mainline Ash didn't try to catch a Pokémon before his catchability came up, but the scene's funny so…