AN: This story follows on from my previous reader insert story! The Spanish is meant to translate to 'I will look after your little girl' whether it does or not, I'm not sure as I used google translate.
You lay curled up in your surrogate Mother's arms as you have done everyday since the night that it happened, one year ago today in fact. Ever since that night, nothing had been the same... you had never been the same since he had violated you repeatedly, all because you had been kind to a bartender. You flinch slightly in Olivia's arms and she hugs you tight, gently pressing a kiss to your forehead.
"Hey... it's ok baby, you're safe. Mama's got you..." Olivia cooed, gently pulling your curled form onto her lap and rocking you back and forth as you bury your face into her chest. You feel scared and anxious, your heart physically hurts and you wished that it didn't. All you want is for things to be the way they were before! All you can do is close your eyes and hug her tight, nuzzling your face into her chest.
"Hurts Mama... he's taken my whole life away from me! I will never be free... I'll never be the same!" You hiccup and she just cradles you in her arms as though you're a child. You wish that you could stay here forever and be safe with her.
"I know, little one. I know how much you're hurting... you just tell Mommy all about it. That's it sweetie, Mommy's here... I won't let him hurt you again! Todays the day!" She whispers and your eyes widen slightly, how could you forget!! Today was the day that you faced your abuser in court! Today was the day you would find out if he would go to prison for everything he'd done to you.
"What if... what if he hurts me? What if he says awful things about me and the judge and jury believe him? What if..." You begin to work yourself up and Olivia stops you by pressing kisses to your forehead, cheeks, nose and mouth. It's so maternal that you just lay against her, finding comfort within her arms.
"Y/N you've already done the hardest part; you survived what that prick did to you... besides, do you really think he would try anything after what I did to him in the Precinct?" She whispers softly into your ear, the scent of her Miss Dior perfume wafting into your nose and you hiccup gently. A little smile etched across your face as you remember exactly what your 'Mama' had done!
It was a month after you had been assaulted and you were still no closer to finding your ex partner. You had been on edge continually, always wondering whether he was following you or would turn up at the Precinct to hurt you at any given moment. The last couple of weeks had felt different to all the other times; it started off by feeling like you were being watched everywhere you went, your cell phone ringing continuously and then mysteriously hanging up and packages constantly being sent to Olivia's house from an unknown sender and deep down you knew... he was back! On this particular day, you were in the Squad room with Elliot and you felt the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. You felt as though you were being paranoid so you just ignored the feeling for a while, it was only when Fin, Amanda and Nick got back that it kicked off.
"Y/N!! You fucking whore!!" Immediately you whirled around and screamed, it was the worst scream that the three had heard and they were frozen in their seats from shock! You backed away from the man who violated you so badly barely a month before and you realise that the other three had no idea what this prick had done; both Olivia and yourself deciding not to tell them, at least for the time being.
"Leave me alone! Stay the fuck away from me! I won't let you touch me... Not again!!" You screamed and picked up a chair, barricading yourself from him. By this time, the other three had figured it out and ran to your side. They all screamed at him and got in his face, they screamed so loudly that no one heard Olivia and Chief Dodds emerge from her office.
"What is all this noise?" Chief Dodds boomed, stopping you in your tracks and making you run towards Olivia; you just wanted your Mommy.
"Mommy! He's here... he's come back!! Make him leave... I don't want him here!" You yelped and buried your face into her neck as you sobbed pitifully, you feel her arms encase you lovingly and she rocks you from side to side... almost sending you off to sleep because you feel so safe in her arms. Olivia looked up and the maternal fire in her eyes made Elliot, Fin, Amanda and Nick recoil back, Chief Dodds just stared incredulously at the six of you and then at the man who was the cause of this hysteria.
"What on earth is going on? Detective Y/N are you quite well? Since when is Captain Benson you're Mom? Have I missed something here..." Chief Dodds trailed off noticing Fin and Nick's small smile; it was common knowledge that Olivia was the Mom that you'd never had. Olivia just cuddled you tight for a couple of minutes and brushed her fingers through your hair.
"Mommy's here, sweetie. You're safe... I won't let him hurt you! Not again... here go stand with Elliot!" Olivia cooed, allowing you to let go of her and move over to Elliot who just scooped you up into his arms like an infant. Immediately you buried your face into his neck and sobbed for both him and your 'Mama' to make it go away. Chief Dodds just stood there completely dumbfounded as he watched the scene in front of him.
"I know what you've done! I know EVERYTHING!! You're lucky that I don't knock your teeth out after what you did to MY baby! I'm giving you one last chance to leave!" Olivia snarled squaring up to the man who had taken everything from you against your will. You hide your face in Elliot's neck and cry for him, you cry for the only man who's looked out for you and tried to be a Dad to you.
"Daddy!" You wept anxiously and gripped his neck tightly, your face buried into his shoulder so you missed his look of shock but also a look of paternal love that marred his features. It was obvious to the others just how much he loved the fact that you were calling him Dad, the only person who didn't find it cute or endearing was Chief Dodds who was livid with the situation.
"She was asking for it! She wanted me to fuck her... she didn't say 'No stop!' She said, 'No don't stop!'..." Your now ex boyfriend had smirked and Olivia jumped on him, knocking him down to the ground before punching him across the face. Nick, Amanda, Elliot and Fin watched on with a mixture of shock and admiration whilst you just buried into Elliot's shoulder and clung to him tight.
"Captain Benson!! What the hell do you think you're playing at?!" Chief Dodd's screeched, making a move to grab Olivia from off of the man that she was laying into. Fin blocked him from grabbing Olivia and let out a cheer.
"Go Liv!!" He cheered loudly, ignoring Chief Dodd's scream of 'Detective Tutuola! Stop encouraging her!' It was only when your ex was a bleeding mess did they finally pull Olivia off of him and have another Detective arrest him.
"Mommy! Mommy..." You wept anxiously; worried that she'd been hurt by him and also worried that Chief Dodd's would have a go at her. Olivia snapped out of her rage immediately and came rushing to you, carefully taking you from Elliot and snuggling you protectively in her arms.
"Shhh, I've got you. You're safe honey, I've got you... Mommy's here!" She cooed, taking off her favourite sweatshirt and wrapping it around you. It felt safe and warm... it was so comforting that you fell asleep propped up against her and she sat down on the chair, cradling you to her as though you're a young child. Olivia glanced up at the rest of the Squad and nodded her head, confirming their suspicions without actually saying it. She looked up at Chief Dodd's and cringed; she'd never done anything as unprofessional as what she had just done and was surprised to find him grinning slightly before schooling his features.
"Chief, I'm so..." Olivia had begun and he'd shook his head; in his eyes that prick had deserved it! Once he realised what this animal had actually put you through, his attitude had completely changed.
"Just don't do it again... Mama Benson!" He joked and the others snorted, so he did have a sense of humour! What you didn't realise until later was how they were all plotting how to prosecute the sick son of a bitch for everything he had put you through!
Coming back round to the present, you shake your head slightly to clear the thoughts from your mind. In that time you had realised that Olivia had left the room to get you both some breakfast and was now back with two massive stacks of chocolate chip pancakes, your favourite breakfast.
"Thanks Mama..." You whispered and picked at it, your nerves were all over the place due to the trial and Olivia could sense this. She waited until you had finished with your breakfast before wrapping an arm around you and pulling you in close to her.
"It's ok... I'll be right by your side the whole time! I won't let him victimise you again... it's going to be ok, you don't have to put on a brave front... not anymore!" She cooed and you nuzzle your face into her chest and stay there for a little while, allowing her to comfort you and take away some of the pain.
"I still feel so disgusting... it's been a year! I should be over that by now..." You trail off and Olivia tilts your chin up with her finger and nuzzles your nose with hers as if you're her own baby. She leans back and cradles you to her chest, pressing kisses to your head.
"Y/N you are not dirty, you are not disgusting! You've had a part of your body stolen from you against your will and it's not your fault; he hurt you, he violated you... he did this and it wasn't your fault, it's not your fault baby..." Olivia whispered and your lip began to shake, the tears falling down your cheeks like a waterfall.
"I know, little one! I know... Mommy knows, Mommy understands..." Olivia laid your head back down on her chest and stroked your hair, she just allowed you to cry for everything that had been done to you.
"I'm scared..." you whisper and feel Olivia's arms tighten around you so tight that you let out a small squeak. You feel her sit you both up and she cradles your small face in both of her hands, very gently rubbing her thumbs across your tear soaked cheeks.
"I know, sweetheart. But you'll be safe... you'll be safe!" She cooed and pressed a kiss to your cheek, keeping you in her arms until you had to go and get ready otherwise you'd both be late for court.
"Come on Y/N... let's get ready and get you the justice you deserve!" Olivia whispered and you nodded, hoping that they would see how awful he was.
It took a couple of hours for both you and Olivia to get dressed and get to the courthouse in time for the trial. You were awfully touched when you saw the entire Squad standing outside of the Courthouse.
"You all came?" You whispered and your face crumbled, you just fell into Elliot's arms. He'd become a father to you over the last year and you felt safer when he wrapped you up in his arms, allowing you to snuggle into his chest.
"That's right, sweetheart! Of course we all came; we're a family and we all love you so much! You're so loved Y/N! Daddy loves you..." He whispered that last part in your ear and you smiled softly, pulling away from him and hugging the other members of your makeshift family. You felt so safe, especially when Rafael took you into his arms and cuddled you tight.
"He won't know what's hit him when I question him on the stand mi amor!" He whispered protectively and you both let out a small giggle when you hear your surrogate mom speak as well.
"Or when he sees me watching him! I swear if he says one thing that I don't like then I'll be straight over there and..." Olivia trailed off once Rafael started to shush her, anxiously glancing around making sure that your ex's lawyer was nowhere near any of you.
"You could cause a mistrial Liv..." Rafael chided gently and rubbed his forehead, gently releasing you from his hug. You all stood there for around 20 minutes until the court officer called your case... you took a deep breath and began to walk to the room with Olivia and Elliot either side of you. You freeze up when you see your ex and his lawyer coming towards you, a smug grin on his face. You began to shake, knowing that your ex and his lawyer had planned this on purpose.
"Barba! Fancy seeing you here!" Buchanan smirked slightly, he'd always given you the creeps as well! Just his whole demeanour he was like a shark... Olivia could tell that you were frightened and she stood in front of you, allowing you to literally hide behind her back.
"Wow... aren't you brave! Picking on a frightened kid... MY kid no less! You and that scumbag that you're protecting need to back off otherwise I'll break your jaw!" She snarled towards your ex and looked Buchanan up and down, almost as though she was disgusted.
"I'd break yours as well Buchanan but you don't have a jaw to break!" Olivia snarled, not breaking eye contact with any of them. Buchanan moved closer and Rafael jumped forward, ready to split the two up if he had to although secretly he was very proud of his friend.
"Are you threatening me Detective?" Buchanan said angrily, his face turning red from how furious he was getting... or maybe it was from his high blood pressure, no one was really sure. Olivia spoke very matter of fact and it had all of your friends fighting back smirks and giggles.
"No it's not a threat, it's a promise. Oh and by the way, it's Captain... not Detective! If you're going to speak to me then at least get my rank right! Come along, sweetheart!" Olivia spoke gently to you and ushered you inside, carefully shielding you from the two morons who'd made you scared and ignoring Rafael's mumbled chastising about being professional and not threatening fellow lawyers which could be bought up in chambers! Once you were all sat down and ready, Judge Donnelly sat down and glanced towards the jurors and the other people within the court room. You sat so close to Olivia that you were nearly on her lap and she squeezed your hand tightly.
"Good afternoon Ladies and Gentlemen! Let's begin... so Mr Buchanan your client is being charged with rape in the second degree... how does he plead?" She said, putting her pen down and looking at the two men.
"Not guilty, your honour. This charge is ridiculous, it's just drunken sex that Miss Y/N has regretted after the fact! Yes, it was bad judgement but rape... not a chance!" Buchanan said firmly, rolling his eyes when Rafael stood up and defended you. He went to bat for you; defending your honour, your integrity, your personality... he defended you so much that Judge Donnelly had to step in.
"Mr Barba... Mr Buchanan that is enough! Whilst I sympathise that this is one of your own, Mr Barba there is no need for swearing and referring to Mr Buchanan as a stuck up prick. That is unacceptable... one more remark like that from either one of you and you'll get a 500 dollar fine... do I make myself clear?" She rubbed her forehead, trying to relieve the impending migraine that this case was causing her. Both men agreed reluctantly and proceeded without incident, for a while at least.
"Your honour, I'd like to call Y/N to the stand..." Rafael said softly, feeling sympathetic when he watched you get up and make your way to the stand. Your legs were shaking and you sat down, watching as Rafael spoke to Olivia and you could only make out a few words.
"Liv... I'll look after her, yo cuidaré de tu pequeña!" Rafael said softly, only switching to Spanish when he was in high stress situations which this was! Not just for you but for all your friends/family as well.
"Y/N I'm so sorry that we're here today under these circumstances... so, in your own words can you tell me what took place on April 2nd 2023?" He said gently, moving over to stand by your side so that you could look at him and not at the animal who'd hurt you. You took a huge deep breath and begin to talk, the words flowing from your lips before you could stop yourself.
"Well... H/N and I had been having some problems within our relationship; we were both working a lot and not spending time with each other, so we decided to go out for some dinner and drinks!" You spoke softly, your eyes going watery and red as you start to talk.
"We went out and everything was fine... it was good, we had a nice meal and we spoke... it was so normal and then we went to this cocktail bar after dinner and everything changed! I went up to the bar to get us a drink and I started to talk to the bartender, he was just a kid! But it made H/N so angry... he uhm... he dragged me by my arm out of the bar and he screamed at me... he called me a whore, a slut, a cheater he also said..." You were interrupted by Buchanan standing up and loudly screaming 'Objection!'. This caused you to flinch anxiously, still struggling to cope with sudden noises.
"Hearsay!" Buchanan added and Rafael turned around and glared at the bully who was hiding behind his law degree, he was fuming at the way he had scared you and he snarled angrily; ignoring his own advice as he laid into the man who was throwing his weight around.
"Let her talk! It's not hearsay when we have 5 witnesses as to what he said! So shut up or I'll..." he quickly stopped himself from going any further; he knew that Judge Donnelly was giving him a lot more leeway than usual and he was grateful for that.
"Mr Buchanan! That is enough..." Judge Donnelly added, glancing sympathetically in your direction before schooling her features. Rafael smiled kindly at you and put his hand on the top part of your arm, helping to keep you grounded and calm.
"Then what happened?" He said softly, reaching for a glass of water for you when your mouth went dry and you sip it slowly. Desperately trying to calm yourself down as you relive the worst experience of your life and in public as well!
"He... he dragged me to my apartment and he smashed my head against the wall and pulled me up by my hair... he said that if I wanted to act like a whore then he would treat me like one. He dragged me into my bedroom and raped me... he raped me for hours until he got bored! He hurt me so badly and he just didn't care! Once he... once he left I rang my Mama... uh I mean my boss, Captain Benson and she came and got me from my apartment!" You're in tears at this point and Rafael hates to push you further but he needed to hear the last part... he can see that you're unravelling rather quickly and it's beginning to concern him; he was worried sick because he knew that Buchanan was going to absolutely tear you to shreds in front of the jury and the rest of the room.
"She drove me back to her place where I disclosed to her what had happened... she took photos of my injuries and inspected them to make sure that they weren't life threatening! Please stop! Please!" You wail and Olivia gets up from her seat, ignoring Judge Donnelly who was telling her to sit down. She ran across the room and you get up, flinging your small arms around her neck and sobbing harshly.
"It's ok, Y/N. Mommy's here... Mommy's here! You did so good, sweet one. You did so damn good and I'm so proud of you!" Olivia whispered, growing increasingly concerned when you weren't calming down like you normally would. She cooed softly and rocked you back and forth, pressing kisses to your forehead.
"Your honour, I request a short recess before Y/N is cross examined by Mr Buchanan! As you can see she's absolutely inconsolable..." Rafael said softly, glaring at Buchanan as he mumbles things under his breath. It's stuff you can't hear but you get the gist of it.
"So granted... we will break for a late lunch and reconvene in two hours!" Judge Donnelly nodding firmly, banging her gavel down on the surface. Olivia gathers you up in a huge cuddle and gets you out of that room and into Rafael's office, getting ready to spend the next couple of hours comforting you.
After the two hours were up, Olivia and Rafael walk you back into the courtroom. Olivia kept pressing kisses to your cheeks and every part of your face that she could reach. You lay your head on her shoulder, how you wished that she could be sat there with you. They both get you settled down and calm, only sitting back down when Judge Donnelly told them to. You felt sick as Buchanan approached you, you felt physically sick.
"So Y/N why are we here? We all know that you're trying to frame my client for something that he didn't do! Morning after regrets is not rape!" Buchanan said sounding so condescending that you bring your knees up to your chest, beginning to self soothe.
"Objection! He's badgering her!" Rafael said with a growl, he recognised exactly what you were doing and he began to get worried; he could see you begin to regress right before his eyes. Judge Donnelly frowned, not liking the tone of voice that Buchanan was using towards you. She knew that he was a harsh and inappropriate quite a lot of the time however, she had never seen him be this blatantly cruel.
"Watch your step Mr Buchanan! I won't have bullying in my courtroom!" She said and he softened slightly, only a little but it was enough to where she was happy for him to proceed. You glance up fearfully, seeing your ex smirking at you was terrifying and you began to shake.
"So why didn't you scream? I mean if I was being so badly raped then I would've screamed so why didn't you?" Buchanan said, feigning confusion when Rafael screamed at him. This was too much... you felt as though you were being raped all over again.
"I did scream... he had his hand over my mouth, begged him to stop. I can't do this... can't be here leave me alone! Just please stop... please!" You get up and just run from the courtroom, at this point you're not yourself and you've regressed so far back that it's not safe to question you anymore. What you didn't know was the way Olivia ran up and punched Buchanan across the face and getting a 500 dollar fine, Judge Donnelly being soft on the punishment because she knew how close the two of you were and Elliot lunging for him as well! It had descended into chaos and all Olivia could do was worry about you and what they'd put you through.
"You arrogant son of a bitch! How dare you..." Rafael hollered, poking his finger into Buchanan's chest.
"Do you have any idea what you've just done to Y/N?! You've essentially helped rape her again! She's traumatised and she's run off and no one can find her... I swear to God, you'd better hope we find her safe and unharmed otherwise I will hunt you down! I will make sure you're disbarred, you're a disgrace!" Rafael had to be held back by an officer and Judge Donnelly was at breaking point.
"Never in my 40 years have I been so disgusted by a lawyer's behaviour in my courtroom! We will proceed without Y/N's cross examination by Mr Buchanan... we don't need it!" She banged her gavel on the surface again. Olivia got up and walked out of the courtroom, determined to find you and also to stop herself from killing Buchanan and your ex.
It had been an hour or so since your meltdown in court and you were wasted. You were the drunkest you'd ever been and you were still drinking more, determined to make it all stop. You reached for another shot of tequila, only stopping yourself when you felt a gentle hand on your wrist and you knew... you knew that it was your Mama.
"Y/N... honey. No more... that's enough, come on I'm taking you home. Hush, little one... you're safe! I'm here, you're ok!!" Olivia cooed and just picked you up in her arms, cuddling you tight and rubbing your back.
"Mommy..." You sobbed anxiously, allowing her to stroke your hair and get you out of the bar and to her car. She gently put you in and buckled your seatbelt in, she also opened up your window so that you could have some fresh air.
"I'm here... Mommy's got you and I'm not letting you go, I'm so sorry darling. Let's get you home and into a lovely hot shower, fresh pyjamas, a hot chocolate and we can snuggle in bed together and just talk if you want. How does that sound?" She coos at you whilst she's driving and you begin to feel a little safer again, that's all you want. You just want to feel safe.
The drive lasts for around 15 minutes or so and then Olivia pulls up, securing the car and getting you out. She just picks you up onto her hip with ease, listening to your drunk rambling and allowing you to cuddle her. She shut the front door behind you both and locked it, gently placing you down and allowing you to stumble to the bathroom.
"Can you help me Mama?" You whisper and she lovingly helps you to undress and place you into the shower, helping you to wash yourself and your hair. She talks to you with so much love and compassion that you just want to cry and cuddle with her, you feel like you've blown it and that he will get away with this. After another half an hour or so, Olivia lifts you out and wraps you up.
"Come on, Y/N. Let's get you dry and into some warm pyjamas! Then I'll make you a tea..." she soothed and led you through to her bedroom, drying you off and putting her nicest pyjamas on your body. She tucks you up into her bed and goes off, quickly making you a hot sugary tea and then climbs into bed next to you.
"I'm sorry Mama... I've blown it!" You whisper and Olivia kisses your cheek and cuddles you tight, gently running her fingers through your hair and providing you with so much love and comfort.
"Y/N it was not your fault! Buchanan was awful to you... Judge Donnelly was furious with him and they've decided to go on ahead without your cross examination!" She cooed and kissed your cheek, hugging and spending as much quality time with you as she can.
"I may have punched Buchanan in open court!" She blushed and you stare at her completely dumbfounded, never ever had Olivia done anything like that before. You lay on her chest and cuddle her, beginning to sober up and feel safe.
"Also Rafael nearly got fined... it was an absolute circus in that courtroom because of him! How dare he bully you in that way! I want Buchanan to pay for everything that he's done to you!" She rubbed your head soothingly and kissed your cheek.
"I love you all so much! I love you... I love you!" You whisper and lay yourself down, still traumatised and still in pain. Olivia lays with you for hours and settles you down, allowing you to close your eyes and tell her how much she means to you. She means everything.
"I love you!" She coos over and over again until you are asleep on her chest. You know that your safe, secure and loved when she's here.
It was 4:00am in the morning when Olivia's cell phone rang, sleepily she answered it and flinched. Rafael could be so loud in the mornings.
"Liv I couldn't wait any longer! We got him... he's been found guilty and he's never going to hurt her again! He's going to be in prison for such a long time... that moron admitted it!" He scoffed and Olivia had to stop herself from screaming; her baby was safe and no one was going to hurt her again...
"Thanks Rafa... I'll speak to you in a couple of hours; I don't wanna wake her!" Olivia spoke affectionately and hung up the phone. She stroked your hair and whispered comforting words whilst you slept.
"You got him baby! He's never coming back..." she spoke quietly and snuggled you close to her; you were safe and he was never ever coming back. You didn't know it now but in just a few hours time, your life had been changed forever in such a good way.