Techno was no stranger to hating himself.

For a while after his parents died, he would blame himself for what happened relentlessly. After all, Techno had been in that car too. Yet they died and he didn't, so clearly he must have been doing something wrong. He was seven years old, lying under the sheets of a cold, unfamiliar hospital bed, wishing that he could have gone with them. Then he wouldn't feel that immense guilt clogging up his throat all the time.

As Techno got older, he learned better.

Accidents were just that. Accidents. No specific person was at fault for the rain that fell the day before or the temperature dropping far enough to turn the thin layer of water on the street into a major risk. His Dad couldn't have prevented the car from slipping. His Mom couldn't have stopped incoming traffic from crushing the metal into deadly jagged pieces.

And Techno, sitting in the backseat, distracted by the bright lights outside, couldn't have done anything.

But maybe that's why this time, hating himself was easier. Because taking Tommy away from his chances at living a happy, normal life was a choice Techno made. Selfishly motivated by not wanting to end up alone again.

And as it turned out, he ended up by himself anyway.

His hand slid down against the wall, leaving a little streak of blood behind. Techno was terrified, because he knew coughing up blood was a bad sign. He couldn't go to a doctor or the hospital. They'd ask him all sorts of questions and they would find out where he had run away from. In itself that wouldn't matter much, Techno would resign himself to going back. The group home could be his fate for a few more years until he became old enough to actually get a job and take care of himself.

The problem was that they would want to know where Tommy had gone.

The caretakers at the group home would tell authorities that Techno had taken another, younger kid with him. They'd badger him into telling them where Tommy was. They would go and take Tommy away from Phil and Wilbur, surely.

Techno didn't want that. He didn't want to be the reason Tommy ended up without a good family again.

He had gone to the park to get their stuff but found he couldn't stay there. He didn't want to be where Tommy would come looking for him. If Techno died, he didn't want Tommy to find his cold, curled-up body either. Techno watched his parents die, watched their eyes glaze over and look all droopy and weird. He couldn't do that to Tommy. So he bundled the few possessions he called his own up in a backpack and threw the sleeping bag over his shoulder, then left. He wandered around the streets for a while, shivering. It was cold out and Techno never got around to stealing a better coat for himself. After a while, the rain started. Techno had to look for cover.

Without realizing it, his feet had led him back to a familiar place.

Techno remembered this. It was a little storm drain tunnel at the edge of the city, leading into the dried-up river. The concrete was cracked, betraying how long better sewage systems had taken the place of this drain. But it provided a perfect place to rest, to hide from the elements. When they first ran away from the group home, Techno and Tommy had spent two nights sleeping in there before finding a better spot.

And it would serve perfectly to keep him dry tonight.

Techno crawled into it, nails scratching against the roughness of the surface. His knees hurt from pulling himself up, and he was instantly incapacitated by a coughing fit again. Once it passed, Techno barely had the energy left to let the sleeping bag slide off his shoulder so he could lie down on top of it, winding his tail over his trembling body.

He closed his eyes, not so much falling asleep as feeling his thoughts be pulled towards the darkness behind his lids. Then he was gone.

"Fuck, this would be so much easier if only he had a phone."

Tommy bounced his leg in the backseat of Phil's car, ears flicking at the harsh words. He kind of wished he could enjoy this, getting to sit in the car he'd admired so much previously. It was really cool on the inside too, all leather and dark. Tommy thought that it would be the sort of car a superhero would use. Or an FBI agent.

But it was Phil's car, and Phil was trying to find Techno, cursing under his breath. It put him on edge. Tommy didn't like adults who got angry like that.

Phil was helping him though so he wasn't going to complain. Phil promised that they would bring Techno back together. In Tommy's eyes, that did kind of make Phil a hero too. He was scared that his brother was going to die.

Tommy didn't want Techno to die.

"Hey." Wilbur reached over to squeeze his wrist lightly. Tommy tried not to gasp and scratch at him out of instinct, hating to be touched right then. "It's going to be okay. Try to breathe."

"Yeah," Tommy said. It came out all terrified and choked. He could barely gasp.

"I can't see shit right now," Phil complained, bringing the car to a stop. No matter how much the wipers went back and forth, the rain was making it hard to look through the window. "We have to wait for the storm to calm down. It should only be a few minutes."

"What?!" Tommy could feel the panic rising again as Phil killed the engine. "We can't wait, what if he's hurt? You said we'd find him!"

"And we will," Phil said, making a deliberate effort to keep his voice calm. He turned around in his seat to look at Tommy properly. "But we're not going to be of much help to him if we crash into a lamppost somewhere, yeah? Waiting is better."

"But-" Tommy had automatically started to reach for his seatbelt. He wanted to leave. He wanted to get out of the car and search for Techno himself. But Wilbur grabbed his wrist again, firmer now.

"Dad is right," he said. "Sorry, Tommy."

Tommy bit his lip, then nodded. He didn't know where to search anyway. They already went to the park, that was the first place they checked. And all their stuff was gone. He didn't know where else Techno could possibly be. It was late at night and dark. The library would be closed. Techno didn't really go anywhere else.

He was out there alone, cold. Techno always kept Tommy warm.

"How long have you been living on the streets?" Phil asked.

Tommy frowned at him, not wanting to answer at first. Techno had told him how dangerous it was for him to tell adults. He always said that if they knew, they'd get separated.

But Techno was gone either way. And Phil already knew they'd run from the group home, Tommy had told him when Phil took him inside all confused and concerned about finding him on his doorstep in the middle of the night. Tommy didn't know why Techno would do that, would abandon him like that, except that he must have had a good reason. Techno wouldn't leave him unless something serious was going on. Tommy wasn't angry. He was just terrified.

"A while," he said. "From before the summer."

"Shit, Tommy, that's like… half a year. More than that. How did nobody ever search for you?"

"I think they did," Tommy said. "We used to hide a lot more, at the start. But they must have given up."

Wilbur sat back. "I had no clue and I saw you guys almost every day."

Despite the terribly hollow feeling in his gut, Tommy managed to quirk a little smile. "Yeah, we were pretty clever, huh?"

"That's not the word I would use for what you two did, mate." Phil pulled back one hand from the steering wheel to rub at his face. "Living on the streets like that? It's dangerous. You're both lucky nothing worse happened."

"We did fine," Tommy said more confidently. And maybe a little defensive on Techno's behalf. He took very good care of Tommy, they managed on their own. They didn't need Wilbur or Phil. Not before this.

"You lived in a bush," Wilbur deadpanned at him. "How the hell were you two relatively clean despite that?"

"We washed in the fountain at the park," Tommy said.

"Holy shit-" Phil started to laugh at that, sounding closer to desperation than real humor. Tommy crossed his arms, feeling the little toy car weigh down his pocket. He took it out to start playing with it, hoping to distract himself.

"What about when it rained? The bush wasn't watertight, was it?" Wilbur asked.

Tommy shrugged. "We had a little tarp. Or we'd hide inside the library. It only got really bad once or twice, we'd take cover in the-" He stopped, eyes growing wide. "I think I know where Techno is."

When Techno woke up, he could hear this really annoying beeping noise.

He scrunched up his nose, cracking his eyes open. He expected to be cold but he wasn't somehow. Did he crawl into the sleeping bag before passing out? He couldn't remember. His nose burned from a sharp, stinging smell. Shifting, the horribly familiar feeling of a scratchy blanket covering him made itself known. Techno knew exactly what that felt like.

He had woken up in the hospital before.

"How are you feeling?" A voice asked. Techno knew that voice too.

"Been better," Techno said. He kind of turned his head to watch Phil sitting in a chair next to the bed. "Where's Tommy?"

"He's downstairs, getting some food at the cafeteria with Wilbur." Phil got up and stepped to the side of the bed. "He's also the one who told us where to find you so you better give him a big thank you once they're back. If we had been any later, things could have ended way worse for you."

Techno blinked, taking those words in. Apparently, he hadn't given Tommy's memory enough credit. A little embarrassing, honestly.

"Did you hear me, Techno?" Phil cut into his thoughts. Voice rising. "They're giving you antibiotics through the IV right now but the doctors will want to keep you overnight. You could have died if we hadn't found you."

Looking up at him, Techno shrugged. "So?"

It's not like he wanted to die, but it also didn't really matter to him. He was glad to get a last chance to see Tommy again, even if it meant having to face his completely justified anger. Techno knew Tommy would be mad at him - and he had every right to be. But after that, they would ship him off to the group home and Tommy would never want to see him again. Dying would not have made a difference.

"'So'?! What do you think Tommy would have done if you'd died?" Phil asked, cheeks a little red. Techno didn't know what this guy wanted from him, they barely knew each other.

"That's why I left him with you guys," he said. "So he wouldn't end up with strangers."

"You really think that-" Phil stopped, and shook his head. "We'll unpack all of that later. I already spoke to the social worker, Tommy can stay with me for the time being."

That was a relief. Techno must admit that a tiny part of him had been scared that Phil wouldn't want to take Tommy in and would send him away. He didn't think Wilbur would let that happen, but Techno simply didn't trust adults.

Yet here Phil was, keeping watch at his bedside. Taking care of Tommy. It was nice, if a bit unexpected.

The door to the room opened and Tommy basically lunged across it immediately at seeing Techno awake.

"Techno! Are you okay? Does it hurt anywhere? The doctor said they were scared you were going to stop breathing! I got to ride in the ambulance but it wasn't as cool as in the movies." Tommy was pretty much rambling at this point. Techno put his hand on his head to stop him, scratching slightly between his ears.

"I'm fine," he said, coughing. "And I won't stop breathing unless you squeeze my lungs like that."

Tommy let up on the embrace a tiny amount, though not much. His tail was wagging. "Fuck you, by the way. You're an ass for leaving me like that."

Techno opened his mouth, considering if he should bother to explain why he did what he did to Tommy. He'd expected Tommy to be a lot more pissed at him, and relief flooded him at knowing Tommy didn't hate him. He didn't want to sound like he was making excuses. "I'm sorry," he said instead. "How did you know where to find me?"

"I remembered the storm drain from when we ran away," Tommy said.

"You're looking a lot better than when we found you too," Wilbur added, walking around the bed to stand on the other side, with his father. His comment made Tommy's face fall. The memory of what Techno must have looked like then, pale and unmoving, made Tommy cling to him a little tighter.

"I didn't mean to scare you," Techno said lamely.

"I wasn't scared," Tommy said quickly. The statement would probably be more convincing if he wasn't holding onto Techno for dear life. As if the older boy would get up and try to run away or something. Techno was attached to several wires and tubes and stuff, so he wouldn't be able to even if some part of him wanted that. Especially since Phil gently took Wilbur by the shoulder, expression a little hesitant.

"Techno should rest," he said. "We'll head home and come visit tomorrow."

"Can't I stay here?" Tommy asked.

"I'm afraid that's not allowed," Phil said. "I promise I'll talk to the doctor soon and we can figure out something more permanent."

Techno frowned, not getting what Phil meant. Before he could ask, Tommy was shoving a weird fluffy white thing into his face.

"Okay, but then this guy will have to keep Techno company."

"What's this?" Techno took the ball of fur from him, turning it over to reveal extremely sparkly plastic blue eyes. They were kind of hideous, staring straight into Techno's soul.

"It's a polar bear plushie! I got it for you from the gift shop," Tommy said. Wilbur very loudly cleared his throat. Tommy pursed his lips and side-eyed Wilbur. "Fine, we got it for you because technically Wilbur used his money." But then he leaned close to whisper into Techno's ear. "It was totally my idea."

"Thanks?" Techno said, putting it on his bedside table. Tommy immediately picked it up to return it to his side, tucking it in under the sheet alongside Techno's arm.

"Come on now," Phil said from the doorway. Techno could see a stern-looking nurse in the hallway, tapping her foot waiting for them to leave. Visitation hours were already over, and since they weren't technically Techno's family, he wasn't sure they were even allowed to be there. He patted Tommy's shoulder, the gesture a bit clumsy thanks to the IV.

"Go on, I'll be here tomorrow too."

Tommy nodded, shuffling his feet next to the bed for a full three seconds longer before finally giving Techno a quick hug again and following Phil to the door. Techno watched them leave, seeing how Wilbur put an arm around the younger boy's shoulder.

It was hard to tell if the pain inside him was because of pneumonia or something else.

Phil said he'd work something out to let Tommy stay. And despite Techno's selfish nature, he had to be happy about that.

Tommy made four different drawings for Techno to hang up in their room.

"Don't you think you're going a little overboard with the sparkles, mate?" Phil asked, watching him smear glue all over the red roof of the house he'd drawn so he could cover it in glitter. Tommy felt it would make the house look more luxurious. And their future house had to be super fancy, if it was going to have all four of them living in it. They would probably have twenty bedrooms and sixteen bathrooms and a home cinema and a pool.

Maybe even two pools.

"I think it looks nice," Wilbur said.

"You're not the one who is going to spend the next two weeks sweeping glitter from beneath the couch," Phil answered. He didn't actually make Tommy stop with the art project though.

Tommy was in a good mood and he wasn't going to let Phil ruin that.

All the way during the drive to the hospital, Tommy was bouncing in his seat. Phil spoke to the person behind the front desk for a long time, and showed them the papers he had gotten from the social worker. Apparently, their coming to visit Techno yesterday was a bit of a crime. Tommy didn't know how something could be a crime if all they were doing was making sure Techno was okay, but that was fine. All he cared about was that today, they were definitely allowed to be there. Phil finally got the desk lady to understand that and she nodded, gesturing for them to head to Techno's room.

Techno was sitting up in his bed, dissecting a gross-looking ham and cheese sandwich.

"After eating out of trash bins for so long, you'd think you'd be a little less picky about your food," Wilbur said as they walked in.

"You told them that?" Techno asked Tommy.

"They were gonna find out anyway," Tommy shrugged. Sure, he agreed that hiding it from adults was smart before but Phil and Wilbur already knew. There was nothing left to hide. And there never would be any need to hide ever again. Tommy was thrilled.

"The literal trash food was better than this actually," Techno told Wilbur.

"I'm glad to see you're a bit more lively. The doctor said your results were better than they expected, so you'll probably be allowed to leave today." Phil sat down in the chair again, starting to use a pen to fill out some of the documents the desk lady had given him.

"And you're not going to jail!" Tommy added happily.

"Jail?!" Techno repeated, a little alarmed.

"Juvie," Phil corrected easily. But then his face got more serious. "Techno, you do realize that what you did was technically kidnapping, right?"

"I-" Techno swallowed. "I mean, it's-"

"It's fine," Tommy said quickly. "I totally told them I wanted to run away with you and we had a grand old time. And being a criminal is cool anyways, we're criminals too. We were trapezing yesterday."

"Trespassing," Wilbur corrected him. Tommy flipped him off, which made Phil chuckle a little and Wilbur gasp in mock outrage.

"Phil knows all the people who work at the social worker's office," Tommy said. "So he got you a get-out-of-jail-free card."

"That's a bit of a hyperbole," Phil said. Tommy rolled his eyes, because Phil had an annoying tendency to use words he didn't understand. He was just trying to share the good news! "But I do know some people there, yeah. I used to foster kids. So we can figure something out that will keep you from getting into too much trouble."

"I-" Techno started again but stopped himself this time. He looked down, staring at his sandwich. "Thank you."

He didn't look very happy. Tommy didn't understand why.

"Where am I going then?" Techno asked, softly.

"Hm?" Phil asked. He was still filling out the papers.

"If I'm not going to juvie, where am I going?"

"Phil has a big spare room, we can fit a bunk bed in there," Tommy said. "But I get to have the top bunk. Calling dibs now."

But that just made Techno's brows furrow more. Tommy only saw Techno look like that a few times. It was never a good sign.

He remembered the night they ran away, Techno's hands carefully waking him up and pulling him close. How his heartbeat was hammering away in his chest, so scared and uncertain. Tommy hated that. He hated it, hated it, fucking hated it.

"I mean after that," Techno said. "Are they sending me back to the same group home, or…?"

"What? Didn't I just tell you about the bunk bed?" Tommy skipped over to Techno's side, waving his hand in front of his face. "Did getting sick damage your brain or something?"

"I'm not doing this much paperwork for a temporary placement, mate," Phil added.

Techno finally looked up from his sandwich. His eyes were wider than Tommy had ever seen them. "You want us both to stay?" He sounded sincerely gobsmacked about it.

"Why wouldn't we?" Wilbur asked. Techno swallowed uneasily and shrugged.

Tommy started to take out his drawings, a little crumpled from where they'd been sitting in the inside pocket of his coat. "As if I was going to let them separate us. I'd have to bite somebody. You know, I still could. Bite somebody, I mean."

"Please don't," Phil sighed.

"Anyway, look at these drawings I made for our new room." Tommy eagerly shoved them in Techno's face.

"They're- They're wonderful, Tommy." Techno took them from him. His hands were shaking.

"Are you crying?" Wilbur asked loudly. He leaned in closer, as if trying to peek at Techno's face. But he was holding the drawings up to his cheeks.

"No, I probably just got some glitter in my eyes," Techno said evenly.

Tommy huffed. "Bitch! There's a very normal amount of glitter on there!"

Played anger aside, Techno cracked a smile and wiped at his eyes with his sleeve. And that was enough to make Tommy happy.