A/N: One of the options when Xanthe catches MC sneaking off to visit Syphax is to pretend to be in love with her. This is based on what happens if you choose this option.
Athena, you freak! Why did you have to go and say that? Xanthe fumed inwardly. This is wrong! You...me...you can't possibly think?
Xanthe, not being possessed by the gift of retrospect, did not immediately stop to think that Athena's unexpected 'confession' was a little suspicious when it coincided with her sneaking out. She believed the other courtesan's words, at least for the moment.
Storming into her room, Xanthe sat down heavily on her bed. Athena and her together? Ridiculous!
But something nagged at her mind. Why was she, one of the scholae's boldest courtesans, be so thrown off by a some silly confession from a woman she couldn't stand, much be in love with? Athena, in love with her. It was ridiculous!
Is it really that bad? some part of her mind nagged.
Xanthe groaned, angry at her own thoughts. Of course she would never deign to feel anything for the untamable yet charming when need be, challenging (even toward the Senate and Marc Antony!), brash woman. So unseemly of a courtesan. Grace and charm and seduction were the key. Not that Athena didn't have all that in spades, but still, her revolutionary behavior was dangerous.
And beautifully refreshing. Sighing in angry admission, Xanthe admitted that she was fond of Athena after all, and it took her this to realize. Too fond. All that jealousy of her was just a front, a repression of her own feelings. Athena's wild, outspoken, risky ways made her so much more than the simpering of the other courtesans. Herself included, Xanthe had to admit.
When Athena returns from where she's going, will I admit I have feelings, too?
And then it struck her. Why, of all times, would Athena confess her feelings tonight? Sure, she'd said it was to get Xanthe alone, but she had been sneaking out before Xanthe had confronted her. It was just a lie to thrown her off the trail.
And Xanthe wasn't sure if she was relieved now that there was no need now to face feelings she didn't want to feel, or grieved because there was no chance now.