Just a little Stabler chaos...
Sure ya wanna do this?"
"What? Getting a little scared huh?" Liz's eyes twinkled a little, entertained by her brother's obvious hesitance.
"Nah," he was clearly offended by her assault on his pride. "I just don't want you to feel second best for the rest of your life." He grinned wryly.
"Won't happen," Liz winked.
"Alright…if you say so." He grinned.
"Okay everyone, be quiet so I can explain what's going to happen." Kathleen clapped her hands.
"Lizzie's about to kick Dickie's ass…that's what's going to happen." Eli's disembodied voice came from the iPad on the table.
"Language," both Liv and Elliot said simultaneously. They had Noah and Maureen's boys watching the event.
"Uh. Thanks for that," Kathleen jumped back into her explanation, "They will be competing in three areas and a fourth round worth double the points. We will be testing genetic superiority, overall intelligence, dexterity, and a surprise fourth round topic."
Kathleen glanced at the array of family in the room and noticed the shirts Maureen's boys were wearing. Each twin worn a different shirt. One read Team Lizzie and the other read Team Dickie. She pointed back and forth between Seamus and Kieran, "Nice. I love this."
The boys grinned and high-fived each other.
"Now… for obvious reasons," she glanced at the crowd of young children lined up on the couch. "There will be no alcohol consumed through the course of this competition." Kathleen paused for dramatic effect, and received a grateful smile from the parents in the room.
"To test which twin has superior genetics they will be participating in the gallon challenge. We are going to see can survive a gallon of milk first without spewing it everywhere. "
"Oh gross," Maureen said without thinking.
"Good Lord," Elliot groaned.
Olivia shrugged, "At least they aren't knocking back shots in front of my twelve year old son."
"Only like 5% or something like that, of people can actually do it so the person who can, obviously received the better genetic material."
Elliot leaned towards Olivia, "I bet I could beat you."
Olivia rolled her eyes. She was not even close to considering drinking a gallon of milk to prove her superiority. Plus she stopped drinking milk forever ago. She nudged Elliot's knee with hers, "I don't know if you noticed, but the oat and soy milk kick isn't a taste preference." She shrugged, "Around 45 I became lactose intolerant…"
His eyes widened in exaggerated disbelief. "Damn Benson, the universe does hate you."
She laughed wryly. "Don't I know it." A flirtatious grin danced across her face, "But if I had to choose…I'd choose you over lactose any day," she couldn't keep a straight face when she said it, and ended up bursting into laughter.
He shook his head, "that… that was.." he laughed out loud at the horrible line, but leaned in to kiss her anyway.
"Boooooo," they were interrupted by commentary from the iPad propped on the table in front of them. "Come on Liv, that was…ew I don't know…I know you have better lines than that."
She just laughed, but Noah popped in front of the screen to add, "I know right. You at least get a break…I live with them," he said in mock disgust.
"You have my sympathy, little man." Eli said seriously.
"Thank you," Noah said, obviously feeling justified.
Liv pulled out her phone, and Elliot leaned over her shoulder a bit to see the screen. "What are you doing?"
"Scarring your last born son for life," she said while staring at her phone. She glanced up. Her heart warmed when Elliot's eyes flicked to Noah without hesitation.
She stopped what she was doing and pressed a lingering kiss to his lips, "I love you." But then she added. "But not that one." She pointed to Noah. "I meant the college aged one."
"Ah," he said in enlightenment.
"Uh are we doing this?" Kathleen said loudly, and everyone's attention returned to the twins sitting accross from each other at the table.
Noah pulled two gallons of milk from the fridge and sat them down on the table.
"I got skim," Katie provided, "it's supposed to be a little easier."
"Bring. It. On." Dickie said dramatically.
"I have a scoring system, but you guys seem antsy so go ahead and get started."
-000-
Olivia —— Eli
O: Mocking me huh?
E: Come on Liv. It was pretty bad.
O: There are kids here…what was I supposed to say? Oh here are a couple I've been waiting to try. Let me know how they would go over with your dad.
E: Please no.
O: How bout, "Do you want to commit a sin for your next confessional?"
E: I was worried things were going to get graphic. That one's funny. Good Catholic angle.
O: Okay…how bout, "Do I have to sign for your package?"
E: Oh my God. Nope.
O: Oh how about, "I must be a beaver because I'm dying for your wood" ?
E: Ahhhhhh stopppppp
O: lol
E: I apologize, and I will never mock your flirtation techniques ever again.
O: Damn right…
-000-
Eli—Elliot
E: Your girlfriend is straight up savage.
El: Something tells me you probably deserved it.
E: (shudder) no one deserves that…
El: Well, next time you try to give her shit, remember she is ruthless in return.
E: Yeah. I know. Now.
El: Lizzie looks like she's going to puke.
E: Damn. I was hoping she'd win this one.
Don't worry rounds 2-4 coming soon.