A/N: Thanks for the feedback on the previous chapters. I love writing this story and the fact that some of you are still reading it makes me very happy. We're heading to the middle of this fic. This one was supposed to be a short chapter, but apparently I don't know how to do those anymore. In any case, there are many important things happening on this chapter which will lead to more important things on the future. I hope you enjoy it!

A DANGEROUS GAME

Two days have passed since the last time Addison and Derek had a moment alone with each other, not since the kiss they shared on Addison's office. They have only seen each other while other doctors were around, or walking past the halls of the hospital, they haven't even had a proper conversation more than a typical "Good morning, how are your patients doing today?" or even worst "you should try the new coffee machine, it's better than the previous one", the kind of typical talk that they could have with any other colleague, or even with any random stranger on a waiting room. Talks cold as ice, as Derek would define it.

She's no longer the Queen of Passive-Agressive, she's being a freaking Snow Queen now.

At some point during those two days Addison even made him remember all of those small talks he had with Bizzy whenever she would visit them; his former mother-in-law had this gift to always find something trivial to talk about to avoid any real conversation about "embarrassing" situations. Like that time when they've visited her for Thanksgiving and The Captain wasn't around because he was supposed to be on a business trip to Amsterdam, to which Addison hinted that it was a bit convenient how he always managed to have a good excuse to leave his wife on those special days, which Bizzy elegantly changed the subject to talk about the Keukenhof Gardens from the Netherlands, from where she got the seeds for the tulips planted on her garden, which helped her to become the president of her garden club… And that seemed to be a talent running on the Forbes Montgomery family, because now that Addison was giving only those kind of talks, it seemed like she had completely mastered that skill.

Yes, Bizzy Montgomery cold. That's all I'm getting now.

Two entire days like that seemed like an eternity, that was a complete set of forty-eight hours since the moment when Addison admitted her true feelings towards the end of their marriage, since the last time when he got anything different from her than a frostbite. Two whole complete days since their lips had found their way back to each other, and still neither one of them were able to stop thinking about it.

Because even when Addison was trying her best to avoid her ex-husband, she had found herself trapped between her own thoughts, remembering not only the kiss but also what Derek had admitted after, that was something that she couldn't afford to deal with, on the contrary it was better to keep everything professional, or at least try to avoid any moment where either one of them could bring that up.

Even though Addison wasn't actively avoiding him, she did arrange her schedule to be at the practice whenever he was at the hospital or vice-versa, and if by any chance she would find him over the halls of St. Ambrose, she would just turn the other way. And even like that, she ended up finding Derek at some time around the practice's kitchen, but luckily not alone, which is how they always ended up having those work-appropriate conversations.

Those talks were better than the thought of Derek admitting that he had enjoyed the kiss that they shared, talking about the new coffee machine was hundred times better than the thought of being alone with Derek, not when all she wanted was to continue where they left things off.

During that time, Addison hasn't seen Sam either, avoiding him was easier than avoiding Derek, mostly because things with Sam had been messy for a very long time, so much that somewhere deep down she knew they were soon to be over, all they needed to do was to admit it, and sooner or later, both of them had to face it instead of keep their relationship hanging on a thread, as it has been over the past weeks.

Which was why focusing on her work was easier, while seeing her patients or while being in-charge of an O.R. neither Derek or Sam were haunting each and every single one of her messy thoughts.

On the third day, she arrived to Oceanside Wellness earlier than other days, arriving early meant that she was able to avoid not only those awkward conversations but also all the people that she just didn't want to see, being there that at that time meant that she had a busy day planned and no one should be bothering her, not with personal things. She had planned all of her day, starting with a check-up for a pregnant patient at 8.30AM, then a second one at 9.30AM and after that, she will run back to the hospital, where she had post-ops to check and a surgery scheduled at 11AM. Addison always liked to push herself to the limit while working, and that morning was a living proof about it, however more than being a hard-worker, that busy morning she had scheduled was some kind of relief, because the busier she was, then the less time she would spend thinking about him.

Because thinking about him was distracting, and when she had busy days, she couldn't allow herself to be distracted, no matter how much she wanted Derek Shepherd. In those days, her personal desires weren't a priority, especially when those desires were directed to the man she was supposed to spend the rest of her life with, the same who had been there, around her for the past week and the same that at that point, she didn't trust herself to be alone with.

How are you still stuck in my head after what? Twenty years? Damn it, Derek.

While trying to get rid of those thoughts for what it seemed to be the 10th time in the day, Addison got into the elevator, pressed the number and just waited impatiently for the doors to close, tapping her feet on the floor repeatedly and crossing her arms, as if with that gesture the elevator will suddenly get faster, or even worse, like if those signs would shake all of her thoughts out of her head. However, Addison's attempts didn't work for things to move faster, because before the elevator doors could even close, there was another person joining her in the short elevator ride, same person who kept the doors from closing and instead got right there next to her.

"Good morning, Addison." Dr. Sheldon Wallace announced with a very polite smile on his face, of course he couldn't even imagine that his colleague wasn't in the mood for those kind of talks, not that early in the morning, and much less when she was trying to simply stop thinking. He didn't get any reply from Addison, so he intended to simply continue his elevator ride, he also pressed the number for his floor and kept his eyes on the little screen showing the numbers to ignore the already strange situation. Addison was being too focused on her thoughts to even acknowledge Sheldon's greeting, but then again, she remembered that he had been sort of helpful over the past, or at least she knew that he was someone who could advise her without any kind of judgmental interaction, and right now, she could use some good advice.

It took her less than two seconds to remove her dark sunglasses and followed by that, she immediately pressed the "stop" button, which didn't really surprise Sheldon as it wasn't the first time that something similar happened.

"You know, when I was just greeting you, it wasn't the beginning of an elevator therapy session." Sheldon protested knowing that once again, there wasn't a way out of this and that he didn't have any other choice than to listening to what Addison had to say.

"Aren't you therapists supposed to help conflicted people?" She snapped raising an eyebrow while crossing her arms again.

"I mean, I do have an office for that as you surely know, but I don't think that's what you want, otherwise you wouldn't be locking me inside of an elevator, which leads me to another question… Why do you think you're conflicted?" Sheldon acknowledged Addison's words, which caught her attention.

"Do you think I'm conflicted?" A little sarcastic laugh left Addison's lips. "I'm not… It's just…" She rambled, making Sheldon a bit confused, considering that he had only used the same choice of words that she had said, however, that didn't stop Addison, she wanted to make her point. "I've been thinking and… Do you think that cheating can be genetically passed? Because, let's face it, I come from a family where this can be our biggest deficiency, my mother, father, my brother… And of course, then there's me. Do you think that's something running in our blood?"

"Well, Addison, I believe you're the expert here on genetics here, and the medical community is surely divided about behaviors being hereditary or learned. I'm sure that you also have your own opinion about it, what do you think?"

"This is not a consult about my medical opinions, Sheldon, I'm seriously asking… Maybe it's something running in my blood, you know? Somehow, I always find myself in a situation where I feel tempted, and no matter what, it always ends up very..." Talking to Sheldon was probably the only environment where she could be completely honest without hesitating. "No, wait, forget that… Have you ever been married?"

"I was, it ended up some time ago, actually."

"So, you're divorced too, you understand the feeling that comes after that, right?" She asked almost begging for an answer. "When does that surprisingly amount of pain is supposed to end? You know, the one that you get once you recognize that things are over. Does it ever end? How can you get over the fact that the one person you used to trust the most isn't longer by your side? I used to think that it would take just few months but… How long does it actually take? Five, ten years? It's impossible that you spend all your life wondering, right?"

"The way that those wounds are healed changes for everyone, Addison. For some it takes months, for others yes, it might take years. For me, personally, it wasn't long, mostly because we were in different places in our lives and we were both aware of that." He mentioned. "But unfortunately, a great amount of people takes longer than that to get over a failed marriage."

"Seriously? You're using a "wound-healing" metaphor on me? Is that your shrink talk?" Addison rolled her eyes, why couldn't Sheldon just say what she wanted to hear? She didn't want to hear anything that could easily be found on any fortune cookie.

"You know; people actually think I'm very good at my job." Sheldon affirmed, however Addison didn't acknowledge that, on the contrary, she made another question instead.

"And what if you think – No, what if you know that my former partner also feels that same way? What if we spent years convincing ourselves that things didn't work because we've reached a breaking point with no turning back, but in reality there were just many repressed feelings and so much that was left unsaid… What if you realize that there might be a slightest chance to get to feel that brief amount of happiness? Is that something that I should avoid?"

"Then we're not talking about getting over a failed marriage, aren't we? You're leading this talk to believe that both you and your former partner still have some feelings that you don't want to get over, am I correct?" He inquired but the only answer that he got was Addison shrugging and leading against the elevator walls, which is why he continued.

"What? No, of course I want to get over him, I mean, of course that I am over him... Over that marriage. I'm just wondering… What if there's still something?"

If there was something that Sheldon had learned over those forced therapy sessions was that Addison always wanted to turn around each advice, which is why he needed to lead the conversation back to the actual issue.

"It's very much likely that there will always be something, the kind of bound you share with a former spouse is something very strong, that strong that most people struggle to let that bound go, or to replace it with another one… There's nothing wrong for you wondering what could have been, but then again, being around an ex-partner might be a dangerous game. There might be many old repressed feelings involved, if things don't end up well again, which in most of the cases they don't, then the healing process might take even longer than the first time around, and it might be harder to get a proper closure." Sheldon tried to explain, but Addison was trying to get her own conclusion out of his words. "But then again, there are few exceptions when former husbands and wives do find their way back to each other and it works better than the first time, but it is unlikely to happen."

"A dangerous game, which might be worth playing. Is that what you're saying?" She inquired, hoping to get any sign of approval on what she's been thinking over and over the past days.

"No, I am just saying that once you cross that bridge, there is not an easy way back."

"Maybe I don't want an easy way back." Addison mentioned out loud with a brief smile on her face.

"It seems like you've already made your own choice, haven't you?" Sheldon asked concerned about how Addison was taking his words, it was like she wasn't even listening to his advice.

"Thank you, Sheldon. You've been very helpful."

Sheldon on the other hand was confused about Addison's reaction. "You know that I am not encouraging you to go after your ex-husband, right?"

Addison pressed again the "stop" button, finally allowing the elevator to keep moving.

"Of course you're not… You're not that good of a therapist."

XX

Just like his ex-wife, Derek had been also focused on his job during the past few days, the day before he had been on the hospital checking Luke's progress, his patient from Seattle was slowly recovering for his last procedure and his results were very optimistic, so much that he was actually considering taking him back to the O.R to finish the procedure that they should've completed on the same day of Derek's arrival. Luke's surgery was a sign of relief professionally, because he had promised his family that he will not only make it, but also that he would leave the hospital being a healthy man, but of course, personally it was a completely different situation because with Luke being ready to have surgery, it meant that he had to work again with Sam Bennett, not only the first time was bad enough but now he has made very clear that Derek's presence was not welcomed by him and he wasn't even trying to hide it.

The man works at the same practice as his ex-wife, but God forbids I show up my face around and even mention the name of the woman I spent a third of my life with, that seems to make him lose his mind. Pathetic… Or afraid?

The fact was that Derek only wanted to do his job and do the best for his patient, no matter how complicated Sam was making it look, because even if he didn't mention anything related to Addison, Sam would still find a way to start an argument.

Pathetic. Afraid. Jealous.

Those were the three words coming into Derek's mind when thinking about how Sam had been acting lately, especially when he didn't have any right to act like that, well… In any case, what might or might not have happened between him and Addison was not anyone's business, especially not Sam's.

But moving on to a better (and hotter) subject, Derek couldn't also stop thinking about his ex-wife. Mostly because they've only had those little trivial encounters in the most inconvenient time, and each time he would try to find her to finally get something less Forbes Montgomery of her, she was always caught between surgeries. And that was only whenever he had a free slot on his also busy schedule, the neuro department had been demanding over those past two days, and that was the reason why he was in Los Angeles in the first place.

On that third morning, Derek had decided to start his day earlier at the practice since he had agreed to meet one of Amelia's patients. He was finding very strange how the life of that work environment was looking more appealing as the days went by, at first he wouldn't understand how many surgeons could even think to work in a place like that, but now, he was starting to see the perks of working on a Private Practice affiliated with a hospital.

Following Addison's cold advice, he headed directly to the new coffee machine to try it, and as expected, she was right. That was something that he would definitely miss once he's back to Seattle… Or maybe he will just ask about the coffee beans and bring some of those back home, at least with that, there will be fewer things to miss from California.

It was right when he was starting to check if there was any sign for the Californian coffee beans, when the ringtone of his mobile phone brought him back to his reality, he took the phone from his front pocket on his jacket and saw a familiar name on the screen, it was again a call from Seattle, same call that he's been refusing to take over during the past few days, because that call would mean that he needed to face the reality he left on Seattle and right now, as complicated as things were in Los Angeles, they were still better.

For one moment he considered to pick-up the call, after all, it was something that he needed to face sooner than later, after taking a deep breath, he was ready to answer but it was when he heard a greeting when he decided to once again decline the call, besides, he could deal with that later.

"Hey… Good morning." Addison announced while stepping into the kitchen, just like she would do with any other colleague because that was how they were functioning now. But after her conversation with Sheldon, Addison wondered why keep even bothering to try to be like that? Especially when she didn't really want to avoid him.

"Addison… Hey. I – Good morning… It's nice to see you." He smiled at her, and Addison couldn't focus when he smiled at her. "I haven't seen you much lately." Derek pointed out, mostly because he couldn't think about anything better to say, it was either that or to mention how great she was looking that morning and considering that they've been talking like colleagues, he was sure she wouldn't appreciate that second choice.

"Yeah, well… I've been busy, I guess you too." Addison pointed out after grabbing a bottle of green juice from the fridge while Derek on his side of the table was grabbing an apple.

"I have, yes. Uh, I didn't think it was possible here but I've been stuck between surgeries and endless meetings."

"Any updates on Luke? The last time I check he seemed stronger."

"He is, if he keeps getting better, we will be able to operate in just a couple of days, which is earlier than we were expecting. This time he will have a proper chance."

"It's so good to hear that." Addison replied with a soft smile.

Great, now we're back to small talk.

"You know; it doesn't have to be this awkward between us." He took the first step because knowing Addison, she could keep on talking about patients all day, or worse, about any trivial thing to avoid their long-coming talk about what had happened and about what both of them had admitted.

"Derek…" She started, but Derek didn't let her finish, he insisted because he couldn't deal with Addison being a younger version of his former-mother-in-law, at least not around him, not when he knew that she wasn't actually like that and was only doing it to keep her distance from him.

"Hear me out. We don't have to talk about it, you said it yourself, we're very much beyond what happened the other day and yes, we're both mature enough to let that go without any consequences if that's what you really want… We don't have to mention it again if you don't want it." He made a pause keeping his eyes on her. "I know you want to be professional and talk only about patients or those ridiculously good coffee beans, but… That's not us, Addie. I believe we can move on, forget about it and go back to be friends… We were good friends at some point." Among other things, he wanted to add. "…Most of the people here at the practice seem very nice, excluding the obvious choice, most of them have even been very welcoming but being honest, you're the one I'd rather to share a cup of coffee with or at least being able to talk as we used to, we're many things but we're not strangers, you know?"

Derek was really hoping that this time she wouldn't walk away, or that she wouldn't turn the conversation into a patient care discussion or one of those talks that only a Forbes Montgomery could hold for so long.

Addison on her side was caught by surprise by Derek's words, of course she wasn't expecting that after days he would finally say that, but she was glad that he did, because that only meant one thing, she was not the only one thinking about it. And if it wasn't for the conversation that she just had with Sheldon, or better said, the elevator therapy session, she would have given him a cold shoulder and walked away, but this time she chose not to do that and staying instead. Besides, she knew that her ex-husband was right, if they wanted to survive the rest of Derek's stay in Los Angeles, then they needed to get over that kiss.

That hot, passionate and hungry kiss.

"Fine. But we can't never mention it again." Addison broke her silence and her coldness from the past days. "And yes, you're right… We were very good friends at some point." Addison noted after smiling at him too, however she didn't agree completely, because even though they did start out as friends, that didn't last longer because as soon as they got together, their "friendship" became much more than just that.

"There was a time where I thought of you as my best friend, you know? So what do you say, Addie? Let's start over as the friendly divorced couple that we were." Derek suggested, even though he didn't want to drop the fact that they had kissed some days ago, he couldn't just deal with her not being her truly self around her. And even though it wasn't much of a win for both of them, it was at least a small step for them to be closer, which was better than being apart, right?

"I don't know what to say, Derek. I mean, I am a very likeable person." She laughed, talking to Derek, even after two days of awkwardness, felt right. As much as things were complicated between them at the end, there was a time where things used to be easy, and right now, that's what Addison needed.

"If you say so." Derek teased. He smiled at her, just on that same way that he used to do it back in their med school days, back when they were just a couple of carefree kids falling in love, the same smile that used to drive Addison crazy, something that happened even to the date.

"They're Ethiopian, specially roasted. The coffee beans, I mean." Addison said interrupting what it might have seen as a staring contest between them, changing her tone to a more serious one. In the meantime, she grabbed the bottle of juice and sat right in front of her ex-husband. "However, the key to a good espresso is the quality of the grinder."

Surprisingly for Addison, that comment made Derek lift both of his eyebrows and burst into laughter.

"Do you realize how much like Bizzy that sounded? That was a very Forbes-Montgomery way to put an end to the conversation, Addison." Derek admitted, finally saying out load what has been on his thoughts whenever Addison would bring that kind of trivial talk.

"What? I'm not… You did not just say that." Both of them were laughing, like if they weren't avoiding each other over the past two days, like the time had stood still and they were still Addison and Derek. "Shut up, Derek."

"Hey, what's so funny?" And suddenly the laughs were over as soon as Sam joined them on the kitchen, this time he didn't even bother to act if he and Addison were getting along, because since the last time they tried to talk and put an end to their relationship, they've been only drifting apart as the days went by.

"Well… It was just… He thinks that I'm sounding like… Never mind, it's nothing actually." She looked at Derek with a much smaller smile on her face, to which he also responded the gesture, which followed Addison standing up from her chair and walked to leave the kitchen. "I- I actually have a patient to see right now… I'll see you both later, I guess."

That small exchange didn't go unnoticed by Sam.

"Yeah, sure. See you around, Addie."

"Addison, can we talk later?" Sam suggested before Addison left the kitchen, sure he didn't appreciate to find her there laughing along with her ex-husband, but he was also aware that he needed to control his temper, or at least that was what everyone kept saying.

"I'm very busy today but I'll call you." Without even waiting for an answer, Addison returned to her office and even though it wasn't visible, she was still smiling after finally having a conversation with Derek, at that point, she couldn't care less about Sam's reaction or what he wanted to discuss, because she was certain that things between them wouldn't change.

Once they were both alone, Derek took a sip of his coffee and looked at his colleague.

"Uh, Sam, I was actually heading to your office to find you. We've got some news from Luke Holloway, he's progressing better than we expect, I would like you to examine him and if everything looks good, we can schedule a date for the surgery." Derek informed, being as professional as he could, besides he wasn't the one picking up fights with Sam, despite of his desire to hit him on the head (which was still very much present).

"Well, I was about to head back to the hospital, I can drop by to check on Luke and sure, if all goes well, we can operate as soon as possible." Sam replied to Derek without hesitation, because the last thing he wanted to focus about was about a patient.

"Thanks for that… But before getting into details about the surgery, I just want to clear the air, because let's face it, we did screw things up the last time and being honest, Luke doesn't deserve that."

"What do you mean that we screwed that up? You keep saying you're the best surgeon out there, I thought that you out of all people could deal with some talking during a surgery, it's usually what most of us do to make the time run faster, you know?"

As much as Derek wasn't appreciating the tone of Sam's voice, he had promised himself that he will avoid any kind of confrontation, especially on their workplace.

"All I'm saying is that I want to know if I have your word to finish this surgery without any complication, because I am more than capable to do it, the question is: Can you?" Derek challenged, because for him, the patient care came first and he didn't mind leaving aside any different he had with Sam to be able to save that man's life.

Coward.

"Excuse me?" Sam asked frowning.

"I am seriously asking, because if you cannot get over the fact that my presence here is intimidating for you, then I will have to find another cardiothoracic surgeon who is willing to work with me, I won't put Luke's life on a risk again because you keep holding a grudge on me each time you remember I was married to your girlfriend."

Sam was starting to lose his patient around Derek, but he couldn't care less, he rather having that conversation there, over the kitchen, than having that same argument over a patient with an open chest on the table.

"I'll do it. Just don't flatter yourself for it, because my only interest here is the patient."

"And that should be exactly your only concern." Derek took one final sip of his coffee, and walked away from the kitchen (and Sam), getting the last word on the matter.

XX

"…So that's settled, we will do the surgery next week, after that, you can keep checking on his progress and let us know how he reacts."

Derek joined Amelia and Cooper to check on a patient, a 13-years old with neurological damages. The consult didn't take as long as they were expecting, because after seeing the scans, they all agreed that surgery was the best choice for the kid, both Derek and Amelia were informing the parents about the procedure. Right after the patient was gone, all three doctors stayed there discussing the next steps.

"Sounds good to me. The parents also seemed to be okay with the approach, I'll call the hospital to book an O.R." Amelia agreed, while still checking on the boy's scans on the screen of her computer.

"Yes, I'm okay with that. He will have a long recovery, but it's the best choice for him." Cooper added.

"So, that's settled then. Let me know once they run the CT and the rest of the exams. Now, if you all excuse me, I need to go back to the hospital to check on Luke Holloway." Derek didn't need to mention anything else, because both Cooper and Amelia knew that was the patient he was treating with Sam.

"So, you're operating again? Do you think you won't try to kill him this time?" Amelia asked, causing her brother to roll his eyes.

"Filter." Cooper added softly looking at Amelia.

"No, I'm seriously asking, because if he can't deal with you, I can do it. At least with me, Sam will keep his control and actually will be able to save Luke's life." Amelia insisted.

"I'm leaving now." Derek announced one more time.

"I think she might be right, I mean, I was there the other night and things were pretty much tense between you two." Cooper added again, as much as he didn't want to get involved into the whole Sam vs. Derek, he was already there.

"Right, I don't think I've ever apologized for ruining the night for you guys." Derek mentioned while turning back from the door.

"Wait, you never actually told me how things went down that night, Derek." Amelia stated, but neither Derek or Cooper gave her any detail about that went through that evening.

"Nah, it's okay. The night would've been boring without that, and just for you to know, we were all on your side. Sam was being out of place." Sure, Sam had been Cooper's friend for years, but being reasonable, it was obvious that he was holding a grudge on Derek.

"I'm seriously considering to start going to these guys' nights of yours, they're way more interesting than listening to Addison, Naomi and Violet talking about babies all night." Once again, Derek didn't even acknowledge what his sister was saying, which made the younger woman roll her eyes, feeling again like that little girl trying to get attention from her older siblings.

"No need to take sides, Cooper." Derek then turned back to look at Amelia. "And you don't need to take over my patient, we've discussed it and agreed to keep our differences outside the O.R." Derek wasn't so sure how much he meant that, but he chose to believe that somewhere deep down that asshole that used to be his friend, was still a good doctor willing to put his patient's needs first.

"Well, we can only hope that you guys stick with that, I don't think Luke can take another mistake by their doctors." Amelia mentioned now in a more serious tone.

"It wasn't my mistake." Derek corrected her.

"I think that the two of them are very capable of going through that without killing each other, or killing the patient. Now as much as I would like to stay here with you Shepherds, I have another patient to check. I'll see you later." Cooper left the siblings alone, Derek once again was about to leave but Amelia stopped him.

"So… I'm just going to ask because you won't say anything otherwise, have you managed to talk to Addie? Or will you two keep avoiding each other until you're forced to get back to Seattle." She asked, being honest since their last conversation the other night, they haven't been able to talk about it, and even though she kept advising both of them, they didn't seem to take any step forward, which for Amelia was a bit frustrating.

"I did, we actually had a good conversation this morning." Derek informed without saying much details about it.

"And?" Amelia asked anxious to know if there was more about the story.

"There's nothing more to add, Amy. We agreed on being friends. And being honest, I'm okay with that. It's the grown-up thing to do, don't you think?" Derek asked rhetorically.

Of course I'm not okay with it, but that's the best I can do right now.

"So, you're sticking with that "friends" crap? You know that's not gonna work, right?" Amelia replied with another sarcastic question, showing a smile on her face, but this time, Derek didn't answer, he simply turned back and walked away to finally go to the hospital.

Little sisters are annoying. And yet, my little sister is goddamn right.

LATER THAT DAY.

"…Earlier you said you wanted to talk about something, so… Here I am." Addison knocked the door on Sam's office and said that while being standing on the entrance. "Is it a good time for you?"

Sam looked up at Addison, he was surprised to finally see her willingly ready to talk to him. "Addison, yes. Come in, though I was thinking that you didn't like to talk about these kind of things here at the practice, I was hoping that we could meet up after work."

Addison closed the door after staying inside and took a seat right in front Sam's desk and in front of him. "Yeah, well… Seems like we've been very busy lately, so if we both have time right now, then why keep delaying the inevitable."

"The inevitable? What are you talking about? I want to speak about our future, Addison." Sam suggested, hoping that again, Addison would fall for his words, because after weeks, he was finally ready to talk about it… Sort of.

"Our future?" She asked raising an eyebrow in disbelief. "Sam, is there even such thing? Because going over our last conversations, or even the last times that we've been together, it doesn't seem like there's something like that in store for us." Addison pointed out, and no, she wasn't just saying that because of how she's been feeling towards Derek lately, she was just tired of dealing with Sam and having that same fight all over again, mostly because neither of them seemed to be brave enough to end things for once.

"What if we do have a future together? I've been doing a lot of thinking over the past few days, and I've come to the conclusion that I love you, and that means that I might get ready to consider having a baby with you. Isn't that what you wanted from me?" Sam asked, hoping a different kind of reaction from Addison, but surprisingly, things were completely different as how he expected.

Why would he even say it like that? He makes it sound like he's doing me a fucking favor!

Addison he thought in disbelief, Sam was really unbelievable.

"You might get ready to consider it?" She repeated, quoting Sam's words. "Doesn't that leave us on the same place that we are right now, Sam?" She challenged him on his smart choice of words, maybe in another time, Addison would have fallen for that, and would even be grateful that he would consider it, but not this time, she wasn't going to do that.

"That's the only answer I can give you right now, Addison. What can you expect? You already know my reasons, the fact that I can think about that possibility should be enough for now."

"What can I expect? I don't know, Sam. Oh, yes, maybe that the idea of having a baby with me doesn't sound like a choice you're making because someone is pointing at you with a gun on your head, or you can at least make it sound more less like a sacrifice you're willing to make so I can keep you warm at nights. This is a decision that you should be all in, or not… And obviously, you're not even ready to "consider it"" Addison said air-quoting those last two words, how is that only now she realized how disappointed her relationship with Sam turned out to be?

"And that's exactly what I am telling you, I am considering it."

"And tell me? How will that work? What if I get pregnant at some point? You won't be involved until you're done considering it? Tell me, what does that even mean?"

"Addison, it means that I am considering the option, not that I am going to impregnate you right now."

Does he even hear his own words? If he says "considering" one more time, I swear to God…

"Are you, Sam? Are you really considering that you want to raise a child with me? That you want to do that all over again because you love me that much? Or is it something you're considering because you saw me and Derek laughing this morning and you're feeling threatened?" She said it, because even though Derek wasn't part of that discussion, she just knew that Sam would bring him up eventually, so she preferred to take that step and ask him right away. He had been avoiding her for days, now once he saw her with Derek, he wants her to think he's changing his mind? He's known her long enough to know she's not that naïve.

"Now that's just ridiculous. Are you even listening to yourself?"

"No, come on, tell me how ridiculous it is. You spend days, weeks avoiding anything related to that conversation, or even avoiding me. Then suddenly Derek shows up and whenever he's around you try to act like we're still this magnificent couple, you start acting in the ways we promised not to act in front of Naomi…"

And now she didn't only bring Derek, but also Naomi, after all she had been one of the affected sides caused by that relationship, and Derek deserved the same respect that they agreed to give her.

"…And not only that, you start arguing with him any time that you have the chance, that you don't even care if you're with our friends or inside an O.R, you still make it unbearable not only for Derek but for everyone around. And now, out of nowhere, after not even talking to me in days or not even acknowledge the fact that we're supposed to be still together, now you suddenly want to "consider" to have a baby with me, the same day when you see me and Derek talking on the kitchen. Does it sound ridiculous? Because for me those are just facts, I know you well enough to know you're smarter than that, Sam."

Sam crossed his arms and looked down for one moment, he didn't want to admit that Addison was right.

"Fine, then what are we supposed to do? Because I don't think either of us can deal much longer with this situation."

Of course he wants me to say it, he can't do it and he won't.

"We have to do what we should have done weeks ago, Sam. We're breaking up. This time for real. I won't make you do something that you don't want, and as you said it yourself, this situation is unbearable for both of us."

"Before you go, I just want to make sure… Are we really breaking up because you want a baby? Or is it because of Derek Shepherd?"

"I think you know as much as I do that we've been over long before Derek's arrival, he doesn't have anything to do here."

"Right, now say it like you really mean it, Addison."

Is this the same guy I used to call perfect and with no flaws? What was I even thinking?

She didn't even give him the satisfaction to answer that, so without saying any additional word, she left Sam's office to return to her own.

Did I really just break-up with Sam?

She wondered, mostly because she was expecting this sudden sadness to take over her, usually she wasn't someone who takes each break-up lightly, when Derek left her she didn't only get drunk all day, but also she wanted to eat everything on her sight. She was expecting to have a similar reaction after walking out on Sam, but surprisingly that wasn't the case this time.

The only thing she was feeling was a void inside her, she had risked many things to be able to start a relationship with Sam, but now, all of that seemed worthless because they weren't able to make it work, but not even that thought was making her feel the sadness that she was expecting to get after a break-up.

She was more upset about Sam's words, than the actual break-up.

Are we really breaking up because you want a baby? Or is it because of Derek Shepherd?

Of course it wasn't because of Derek, though the fact that she had kissed him and hasn't been able to stop thinking about him had played also a big role in there, but still that wasn't the main reason, because why on her right mind will she end a relationship for the ghost of what she and her ex-husband used to share many years ago? That wasn't even reasonable and she was too smart for that.

Sam was wrong, as he was in many things, Derek was not a reason for that. They didn't even act like a couple anymore, why should they keep holding onto something that didn't exist anymore? Addison knew that breaking up with Sam included that her friendship with Naomi was damaged for no reason, and that most people were right when they implied that a relationship with her best friend's ex-husband wouldn't go much farther.

Why didn't I see it before? My best friend's ex-husband, that was just messed-up, even for me. Being fair, my husband's best friend wasn't a very proper choice either.

She did love Sam at the beginning, she was even happy thinking he was the perfect man to her, but as everyone knew, perfection didn't exist and of course, as everyone, he had many flaws, even though at first she was convinced that he didn't have any. But then again, that was the same thing that she thought when she started dating Derek, of course she was still on her early twenties and perfection didn't seem so complex back then.

That also made her think, how was that her own self had everything figured it out at that young age? She was so confident about everything, from when she started in Med School, she just knew that she would become one of the best surgeons in the country, which she did, when she started dating Derek, she was confident that someday they would get married and again, she wasn't wrong. When did she stop being so assertive about her choices? Clearly that younger version of her was smart enough to decline Sam's invitation to go out on a date, how was that years later she changed her mind about him?

Maybe she should start to think again like she used to back in the day, when she wouldn't second guess each of her choices, she was just there doing what felt good, just like Amelia had advised few days ago, and being honest, that's when she has been at her happiest.

It was then when she wondered, why would have the twenty years younger Addison done in a situation like this? When she wanted to feel better and to get over a break-up that she knew that eventually it would hit her.

Then she thought about it, there was only one proper choice. Just like that, she knew what she needed to do.

Addison took her cellphone from her bag and dialed a number. She had to wait for at least five seconds until getting an answer.

"Derek…" She sighed after mentioning his name, hearing his voice in that moment was a sign of relief, besides if she allowed herself being completely honest, probably he was the only person she could allow to see right now "I need you."

"Addison? Is there everything okay? I – I wasn't expecting to get a call from you, do you need me for a consult?" He asked confused, the last time he received a like that from Addison, it was because Archer was dying, and still even then, he dropped everything call to help her (including his plan to propose to Meredith), why would be different now? Still he was glad to hear her voice.

"No, nothing like that, it's not about a consult is just that…" She looked down, while holding her phone strongly against her ear, she cleared her throat before saying anything else and sighed, Amelia was right, she needed to stop thinking about the others and start thinking about herself.

"Can you… Would you go over to my place? I… I need you." For some reason, it wasn't until then when her voice started to break, she didn't say anything else, she was only hoping to hear a response from him.

There were a thousand of things that Derek was expecting to hear on that phone call, but listening to Addison say those words out loud wasn't one of them, but still, as surprised as he was, he answered the only way he knew how.

"No need to say more, Addie. I'll be there."

A/N: So, yes... There will be more Addek on the next chapter! Also, Addisam is finally over guys! I know it has been frustrating seeing him through most chapters (I am even surprised on how much I've writen about it) but he's part of the story, hopefully, they're now over for good, let's see how that changes things between Derek and Addison in the following chapters, as they're slowly getting closer. This is also the first chapter that doesn't have any flashback, usually they complement some of the main parts but in this chapter I thought it was better to focus on the present.

I am trying my best to keep the weekly updates, but with the holidays getting closer, I might take a little bit longer to publish the next chapters, I am already working on the next one but let's see how the week goes.